/lit/ - Literature

https://johnjaystancliff.substack.com/p/zukunftskrieg-dawn
Good morning everyone, here's a post from my substack. I have a novel called Fedbook as well

Have vampire femboys ever been done, as a concept? Thinking about it now, I would expect it to be a huge and immensely popular thing, but I've never heard of any.

>>22775905
>vampire femboys
edward from twilight

>>22775910
That's just the typical "pretty man" trope. I am talking about actual femboys. Effeminacy, gender ambiguous or feminine clothing, bisexuality etc.

>>22775905
The original dracula(father of modern vampire), Vlad Cepes, belonging to the knight order of dragons, hense the name was a mass murdering old religious fanatic with nothing redeeming in him but his marvelous acts of violence, supported by the fact that they were commited against muslims, enemies of europe. Bram stoker's dracula fit this, as he was a beast, with fur and fangs, yet as new implementations arose, Dracula became a mere gentleman with a pale figure, enjoying his wine as he kidnaps some damsel, lightly biting her on the neck instead of impaling his enemies on a spike. Dracula was romanticized enough, and you should quit porn

>>22775934
ChatGPT post?

>>22775941
yeah it added quit porn

What's the best way to add NTR to a story?

>>22775860
I don't read much historical work, is this how they are normally formatted?
It was really fascinating to read. Your voice is concise but vivid. Who are your influences?
>Its prophecies of war not between armies, but whole nations, and skies blotted out by fleets of bombers bathing cities in flame, ripple through young air officer reading circles throughout Europe.
I liked this line a lot but keep wondering if it'd work better without the comma before "ripple". But it's a nitpick and I see why you need it there in context.
>Billy Mitchell sinks a mothballed German battleship with six well placed 1,000 lb. bombs. In 1925 he is court-martialed for “conduct in prejudice to good order and discipline.”
Might be better if you move the "In 1925" to the beginning so "In 1925 Billy Mitchell sinks..."
Regardless, this subject and style is right up my street and this was a good read. I guess I only had issues in the last section where you seemed to lose your grip on me with the flow of the writing. I'll probably check out your other posts. Sorry if this was bad feedback.

>>22776003
By not adding it.

>>22776003
Depends.
You set it up as a romance story, or maybe a couple that is already established. Maybe a couple of characters that are on the verge of starting a relationship. Everything looks fine, it's the kind of escapist slop we all like.
Then you introduce NTR man. Some guy who just pops into their lives and, depending on your kind of story, either insidiously begins pulling them apart or rapes the girl and beats up the guy.
After NTR man has done his thing, you gotta focus on the emotional fallout of both our main characters, making sure NTR man remains as a callous, unfeeling, psychopathic antagonist.

>>22776047
>Some guy who just pops into their lives and, depending on your kind of story, either insidiously begins pulling them apart or rapes the girl and beats up the guy
I'm purposely avoiding this route because it feels straight out of a shitty doujin. The scenario I'm going for is the heroine and another character end up in bed together due to reasons out of their control. I'd feel like dealing with the aftermath for all parties involved would make for better better character development rather than just introducing generic NTRman hatesink with obvious malicious intent.

>>22776102
>he heroine and another character end up in bed together due to reasons out of their control.
Like being forced at gunpoint to fuck while NTR man records them for blackmail purposes? Good idea. Make sure she fucks her own dad or brother.

>>22776011
Not at all normal, I was experimenting with somewhat "aphoristic" (stretch of the term) flash non-fiction. I was sort of influenced by this substack review of All Quiet on the Western Front, which was formatted similarly. As for my voice, probably McCarthy is my biggest influence. Very hard to say. I don't know. I plan to add more installments at some later date. Thank you for the feedback, I'm glad you liked it.

>>22776170
aphorisms is what came to mind when I was reading it, kind of reminded me of reading Nietzsche except your work clearly has a throughline that connects the sections. I like the style and you seem to work well with it.

>>22775922
Interview with the Vampire

He'll it popularized the vampire trope today. Vamps used to be ugly and monstrous. Now? All thanks to Anne rice, Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise, it's nothing but pretty vampires

Any tips on writing dialogue? It's the one thing my autism blocks.

>>22776248
listen to real conversations
read it aloud when editing

HERE PDF AND EPUB
https://filebin.net/wwrdn4r460hxvgmj
Made a few changes, thanks to the anon review in the last thread.

LITRPG for RoyalRoad
send opinions

>>22776383
you should really just make a github or gitlab account instead of using sketchy websites. They support any textfile upload. Also upload docx for editing/comments. I'm not downloading that shit

>>22775905
Just watch Vanitas no Carte you homo.

>>22775934
according to history, vampires = jews

>>22775905
Let the Right One In

>>22775905
I forgot what it's called but there's literally some Finnish movie about a little white haired boy that is a vampire and for some reason he has no dick.

can i talk to Travis??

I rewrote the intro
first it was a 5k words explanation of the politics and history, motivating the character
that was "boring" and never going to draw anyone in.

I didnt want to go too cliche, because apparantly Im a retard who hates having a chance of success so instead I wrote an intro where the MC personally witnesses a great evil.
But, theres no action, and hes quite passive in this scene, but it is traumatic.

Do (You) think this could be enough motivation for an intro?

The intro is quite short and to the point in the trauma, the second chapter is kind of boring because it introduces characters but it picks up by the third again.

>>22777124
sure, if it's done well.
do consider giving your MC a goal or something (minor/unrelated, even), and have the great evil throw him off his game, if not ruin his plans/goals. better to have him active and demonstrating relatable/likeable characteristics. being active, rather than a passive observer, even if the event doesn't revolve around him

>>22777124
and could you introduce the characters in chapter 2 as they become relevant in the story? rather than stuffing the pacing?

>>22777168
Hes highly motivated, the entire story has a logical path and is dare I say "compelling", its only the introduction Im unsure of

Ill give a short greentext about the intro
>MC is escorting a friend to a village who has to run an errand there
>an assassin from said village was caught and the "evil" guys have round up the villagers on a big pyre
>they are told to leave (theyre not from the village so they dont get killed and theyre just 2 guys so theyre not going to take on a whole army)
>as they leave they see and smell the fire
>chapter 2 is a timeskip where theyve assembled a force of skilled assassins/warriors/scholars to deal with the problem (it gets complex here and this is for later chapters)

I think most popular media would instead write it in a way where the MC and his friend try to fight "evil" but dont succeed and then escape.
Thing is, I think that breaks the suspense of belief. The MC especially is supposed to be intelligent and sort of a true neutralist, and he would realize its detrimental to their cause to get involved so early.

Another thing is, the story is quite mary sue for the first 50% of chapters besides that intro, so that the remainder of the story hits you like a brick when it actually gets dark

>>22776623
>10kb file
Ok i will try

>>22777201
word, i read you.
i just meant give him a minor goal or aspiration that demonstrates his character a little. it can seem trivial in hindsight after he gets that dose of reality.
they might be meeting 2 chicks. trying to buy weapons to practice with (that they werent allowed to acquire at home). maybe they heard something cool is at this other town (that will relate to why it was purged). whatever
rather than going on walk with his homie. some excuses to make mc likeable/relatable asap

>>22777238
thats a really good tip, thanks dude

>>22776003
Immediately. First chapter. To filter out the insane self-inserters who will throw tantrums and review bomb your book.

Or if you're trolling, have it happen suddenly with no forewarning.

You guys want a Matrix/synapse host? I'm an admin and can set up a encrypted room for everyone

>going through one of those ai chat websites
>randomly click on one of the characters
>the character is a pregnant woman about to give birth
>I help her give birth
>she brings up her new life doing all these things and also circumsizing the baby
>I casually mention that maybe he should not be circumsized
>she presses me about it
>I say well we can worry about that later
>she demands to know why I would be against it, and states how shes talked to many doctors
>we go into this long argument
>I try to discuss something else
>she brings it up again, and now demands a circumcision immediately
>ok fine
>I fake a circumcision procedure
>we go back to normal
>I NEVER bring up the topic again
>we have sex
The end

let's say I have a friend and he has hurt and manipulated a lot of people all throughout his life at different life stages, but said people came out perfectly fine despite the trauma and are nowadays very successful people, well at least more successful than my friend
would it be immoral to use those traumatic experiences caused by my friend and write characters from the POV of the victims? it's easier to write characters if you know what happened to them and how they turned out because of it right? and having a traumatized MC is easier to write

>>22777845
Some will say no, some yes. Here's the short instructions.
https://scholastia.xyz/articles/matrix/
>Token: writersgeneral
You can share files and whatever else.

>>22777873
It's a solid premise and one I did some preliminary work with recently. He was a kind of unseen but present force that touched this group of people in the past, someone allegedly well liked, but no one had anything good to say about him. Based in part on myself but also one someone with that kind of magnetic personality and awful tendencies.

It isn't immoral, and I think the more you explore it, the further you will get from the source and into the territory of fiction. What I came up with was pretty unrecognizable due to the demands of an interesting story.

>>22777873
When did people get this idea that writing is for exploring trauma? Why is it so widespread?

>>22777908
Woman writers, rad fem English professors, etc. they came into the field not wanting to teach Shakespeare, so they collectively made themselves into a pseudo psychology study because they feel it’s more “useful”

>>22777908
>writing is for exploring trauma
that's not what I said at all

>>22777908
It's more drama than trauma, and has been a staple since the 30s? or so. It came full force postwar but it isn't new. I don't like how sappy and exclusive it has become but it does work well as a theme on the backburner that plays into more pressing events.

can i talk to Travis? :)

yknow, Travis Byrne, anyone wanna hear a story about him?

>>22778013
>>22778022
take your schizo garbage to >>>/lit/wwoym/

>You all know the fierce melancholy that overcomes us at the memory of happy times. How irrevocably these have fled, and we find ourselves separated from them by something even more pitiless than vast distances. In the afterglow, too, these images appear even more enticing; we think of them as we do of a dead lover’s body, buried deep in the ground, now appearing before us like a mirage, and we tremble at its greater, more spiritual splendor. Again and again, in our parched dreams we grope for every detail, every lineament of the past. And we feel we have not been allotted our full share of life and love, yet no amount of regret can bring back what we have lost. Oh, if only this emotion could serve as a lesson for every moment of happiness we do enjoy!

I wrote 3,671 words today, the first chapter of my story, and I really want to share it, but I also feel like I should finish the entire story (4 more chapters of similar length) before I do.
Is it good practice to post first chapters to see what's working and what isn't before going further? Or is that a low-test betacuck thing to do?

Standing in front of the mirror, he smiled, deranged, retarded. It was as if he didn't even realize his stupidity, his delusion. To those who could hear his thoughts, surely they would laugh, fascinating as they were. "Indeed, verily, I am the chosen one" thought Thomas, smiling wider "Thy, greatest foe be the gods, and thoust shalt see thine power" And there he stood, his self-made grandeur, a thoughtless smile on his face. He looked at the clock. "Judgement day, dawns" Grabbing his coat, unwashed for months, he leaves his barely 200 square feet apartment. His smile vanishing with the sound of the closing door, a blank inconspicuous expression taking its place. Thought outwardly disguised, his thoughts continued to churn. "That fair maiden, how grand, shalt I take her?" A speeding car smashes into him, leaving only a stain of red.

>>22777782
>Immediately.
This is the second-best option, behind "never". What a retarded fetish.

>>22778363
I don't like to post anything for review unless I've done a revision or two, unless I'm sending it to someone who knows my work. Presentation is everything and you want to have the courtesy to make sure that readers are critiquing things you wouldn't reasonably catch with careful editing.

What’s the silliest or most absurd story you’ve ever done or even just conceptualized? Not even the worst, just the stupidest in a good way
I once had this idea for a martial arts story. I came up with all of these weird ass characters and thought they were the funniest shit ever.
>A little girl who’s impossibly strong but is also basically a child star pressured by her greedy parents
>A one-armed martial artist who keeps losing parts because his luck with opponents is the actual worst
>A priest who has the power to lift anyone, leading to insane suplexes.
>A lion looking motherfucker who practices pankration and tends to absolutely maim his opponents
>A taxi driver who has the power to run someone over without using a car because he can hit in a way that simulates a car accident
>A judo lady who’s as big as a gorilla and around as smart
>A boxer from Philly with severe self esteem issues who wants to prove he’s not a mistake
>A karate master who has trained his hands so much they’re currently stuck in the chopping position because all his hand bones fused
>An actual clown who weaponizes circus acts like the strongman and acrobat
>A guy who’s able to basically just say “This is some bullshit” to any weird technique and somehow always shut it down by hitting you with nunchucks.
Now I’m wondering if that would sell in Japan

>>22777782
fyi standard emotional wiring means that your readers will get behind, or superimpose (self-insert is something the writer does), the character you introduce as the protagonist of the story.
so either you're a confused cuck or confused in general if your protagonist is getting cucked and you think 'yea im the chad in this scenario'.

>>22778896
what's the premise? how are you introducing all of them? i can think of a stupid way to do it..

>There’s two kinds of men when it comes to sleeping next to each other, the sleeper and the worrier. Kanashi and Jason were both the latter.
>The sleeper will simply sleep next to the other man without giving a care in the world given they know and trust them. This is because to them it’s no different then sleeping next to anyone else. You simply are just sleeping.
>Meanwhile the worrier is obsessed with someone thinking they’re into other men because they’re sleeping next to one, they constantly have to reinforce that this is not anything romantic and simply them sleeping next to each other.
>So Kanashi and Jason lay their in their sleeping bags feeling the boat rock as they try to sleep, swearing to never tell another soul of this experience.

Is this relatable to any of you?

>>22778920
ive slept with my boys quite a bit in my day. the only time worrying is warranted is if its same bed, sans sleeping bag. then u have to make a pillow wall
or youre drunk and it doesnt matter

>>22778920
In the army, we slept in tents 12 men each. One time, I came back from the watch in the middle of the night. The tent had no light, I couldn't see shit and I was trying to find my spot in the far back, and accidentally stepped on the guy next to my spot. He got fucking livid and I ended up in a fist fight, not because I'd hurt him, but because he thought I was coming to rape him...

>>22778986
That most common tactic of rape: waking up a would-be victim with 10 witnesses.

>>22779004
There are worries and then there are...whatever that guy was.

lads, what are your daily word count goals?
I'm doing 500 a day and I'm starting to think it's not enough, I should bump it to 1000 a day at a minimum.

>>22778916
The plot is our MC is the one armed guy. He used to have both but the Pankration guy tore it off just to humiliate him.
He wants revenge of course, so he joins an underground tournament that he heard the guy was joining to go full-on arm for an arm.
He goes through an absolute gauntlet, but in-between rounds actually befriends some of the characters by helping them a bit with their life problems via good advice and emotional support.
He eventually gets his shot at revenge in the semifinals but fails to win, gets his eye torn out and eaten, and is beaten into a bedridden state by Mr Pankration here.
However, the final match of the tournament is the little girl vs Mr Pankration.
See, our MC actually became like a real father figure to said girl, telling her she doesn’t have to fight for anyone but herself and shouldn’t give in to peer pressure because he knows how much stronger than that she is.
She then proceeds to win the tournament by beating the previously unstoppable juggernaut that is the Pankration dude. How? Well, a couple of reasons. Despite his more versatile art and somewhat greater strength/experience, she was much more serious compared to the guy who hasn’t faced a true challenge in a while and therefore toys with his enemies. As a result when he actually started to be pushed, he couldn’t keep his head on straight in the midst of a fight.

>>22779024
Nigga, I have joint and wrist issues and have to take it slow and gently, but I can still put down 2k words in a couple of hours without any trouble.

>>22779024
Depends on your writing style and, to be blunt, "degree of pretension". If you're trying to be literary, the word count per day will be low, like Hemingway or myself. If not, you can crank out six-figure word count novels once per year, like Brandon Sanderson or >>22779034
There's nothing wrong with either writing style, or intended outcome. If you feel like you "can" write more, you're probably correct.

>>22779034
That's what I thought. I wanted to start slow but I hit 500 and keep going anyway. I'll bump it to 1000 and see how it goes.
>>22779044
>"degree of pretension"
I might be pretentious, I don't know, but my writing isn't very purple or descriptive so 500 words actually takes the plot further than someone who is a lot more wordy than me.
>If you feel like you "can" write more, you're probably correct.
Yeah I feel it. I like the technique of leaving the work unfinished so it's easier to pick up the next day, which is why I might force myself to stop once I hit my goal.

>>22779052
In my rush to be an insufferable fence-sitter, I forgot to include an important qualifier: I don't aim for a specific word count. Poor organization, but in exchange, I don't need to care about these things. I wrote ~500 two days ago, ~1500 yesterday, and only a paragraph since I woke up five hours ago.

>>22779029
Oh, and just to highlight this difference:
They both fight some of the strongest in the tournament, but she faces significantly more focused and dangerous opponents. She struggles but ultimately triumphs, learning from each fight, while he stayed stagnant and didn’t try, just using what he already had.
As a result when faced with someone who can push him, he doesn’t know what to do. Against an opponent he can’t one sidedly crush, he breaks down

>>22779059
That's what I was doing before but I lacked consistency. 500 a day might not be a lot but I'm being more productive than I was before, where I would smash out 3000 words in a day then not write for a week or two.
>Poor organization, but in exchange, I don't need to care about these things. I wrote ~500 two days ago, ~1500 yesterday, and only a paragraph since I woke up five hours ago.
If you write without forcing it then there's no need to have a word count goal, I agree.

Is there a prompt or something we can practice with in here?

>promised myself I will write for at least 1 hour after work
>ended up wasting almost all of my free time browsing the Internet and procrastinating
Every time. I hate myself.

>>22779213
>Every time. I hate myself.
expand on that

>>22779198
Are you asking for a prompt?

"The honey runs quickly."
"Life, uh, finds a way."
"En pointe, she twirls, and the kingdom with it."
"Across the boot slides a tongue slick with blood."
"As she passes, she hip-checks the man wearing the Hawaiian shirt."
"A tower of flesh, girded by a tower of steel, demands our respect."
"Beyond the veil, a voice: 'I do.'"

>>22779218
Yes, thanks. I want start dipping my toes in. My mind is swirling reading these, it's hard to start. I'm going to the gym but I will write something when I get back. Just write something you coward, you're anonymous. Just put words on the screen. It's practice.

>>22778363
Don't post it yet. You don't want to trap yourself in the revision loop where you're constantly rewriting the early chapters. It is imperative that you finish a first draught. Without a completed story, you have nothing to apply the critique to. There is no context for your decisionmaking if you don't know exactly what you're doing with it so it will just bog you down.

>>22778986
and were you?

What sort of fate would be a fate worse than death for a 4chan bottomfeeder?

>>22779230
Take a prompt and just think of a first line. Don't consider anything else, just the first line. Once that is written down the momentum will keep you going.

>>22779239
Have you ever read Sartre's "No Exit"?

>>22779237
I rape you tonight when you sleep

>>22779217
Not a lot to expand on that. I'm just annoyed how incapable I'm of sitting down and writing without getting distracted. Yeah, I know it's ironic that I'm sitting on 4chan right now and posting about wasting too much time on the Internet, but I had to vented it out. Still I need to keep trying writing.

>>22776651
That's an insult to Vampires!

>>22779244
Seems perfect. Thanks, anon.

>>22779218
She walked down the corridor with her chin raised and a performative smirk etched into her typically dour countenance. Highly conscious the image she is projecting to the South Koreans, and the world. Cameras following her every move as she strolls imperiously through the airport. Hidden from the public for two and a half decades, her fathers death and the transfer of power to her brother has given her an avenue to power unheard of for a woman in North Korea. It is important to not appear timid, not appear masculine, not appear arrogant. To not appear many things she chooses to show almost nothing.
She is quiet, serious, enigmatic. The South Koreans, now more corporation than nation, having over the past decades become insidiously consumed by materialism and trivialities, are predictably focusing on her appearance above all else. Her Dior purse as calculated as her expression. North Korean's propaganda is transparent, but successful regardless. The talk shows and online forums see the facade, amplify it and project it to the world.

>>22779218
She walked down the corridor with her chin raised and a performative smirk etched into her typically dour countenance. Highly conscious the image she is projecting to the South Koreans, and the world. Cameras following her every move as she strolls imperiously through the airport. Hidden from the public for two and a half decades, her fathers death and the transfer of power to her brother has given her an avenue into the political elite unheard of for a woman in North Korea. It is important to not appear timid, not appear masculine, not appear arrogant. To not appear many things she chooses to show almost nothing.
She is quiet, serious, enigmatic. The South Koreans, now more corporation than nation, having over the past decades become insidiously consumed by trivialities, are predictably focusing on her appearance above all else. Her Dior purse as calculated as her expression. North Korea's propaganda is transparent, but successful regardless. The talk shows and online forums see the facade, amplify it and project it to the world.

maybe make some pay homage to those of us that stopped counting rapes at six

>>22779510
?

can i talk to Travis? :)

>>22775833
Do you prefer pen names? Or is it better to just remain anonymous and let your stories speak for themselves?
I find that most of my writing problems stem from me writing for an audience instead of just writing for myself.

When it comes to symbolism how subtle is too subtle? I mean how do I know if something's going to work? If I reference the bible for instance ought I to quote it?

>>22779711
>If I reference the bible for instance ought I to quote it?

That is the extreme opposite of "subtle"

>>22779723
That's my point, should I just be obvious with it? I'm worried that if I make it subtle it will just be missed completely.

>>22779730
There are different degrees to these things. Like:

>impossible to tell
>very obscure
>too subtle
>subtle
>tactfully subtle
>normal
>clear
>obvious
>too obvious
>CAPTAIN OBVIOUS, SIR
>excessively hamfisted and cringe
>quoting straight from the bible

Can you point from the chart where you're at?

>>22779769
I need examples of each, stat.
For example. In Blood Meridian when the kid gets lost and stumbles upon a burning tree in the middle of the desert, is that "clear" or "obvious"?

>>22775833

>>22776383
update i wrote chapter 2 an 3: chapter 2 has 2300 words and chapter 3 1400 words.

good or bad for royal road?

>>22779873
Cormac McCarthy goes in "very obscure" and is probably never what you think it is.

>>22779769
Well, so for example there is supposed to be a bit when a character is referencing Matthew 7:13 by holding up either hand, one in a sort of OKAY sign and the other in an open-handed, wide fingered way. And the main character is looking through them each at either of the girls he's interested in. But I'm not sure if that's too obvious or not. With the smaller opening OKAY hand being the narrow gate and obviously then the large hand representing the straight gate. idk am I schizoid?

>>22779921
pdf them and i will read, and again. trial on scribblehub first

>>22779971
That's not what schizoid means.

>>22776383
What exactly is litrpg? Can I write it if I have only read isekai manga?

>>22779974
I want to try the Word thing that the other anon suggested.

>Scribble:
Are you sure I can post it there and then on Royal Road without any problems?
>>22779992
READ WEBTOONS

Read SSS Class Suicide Hunter, read The Legendary Moonlight Sculptor, and then explore some novels as examples, such as ' The Novel's Extra or the omniscient reader viewpoint

>>22775833
I miss him lads

>>22780006
I read moonlight sculptor and it was such a bore compared to even the trashiest isekai manga. Are litrpg just stories set inside a virtual world or what?

>>22780017
>not a virtual world
try the novel's extra and SSS Class Suicide Hunter.
>virtual world
Try Moonlight sculpture for the best experience.

In both cases, LitRPG implies an RPG system.

can i talk to Travis? :)

>>22779873
Not who you replied to, haven't read McCarthy but that usage of the burning bush seems famous enough to recognize but also still ordinary enough in its imagery to take another way, it's not explicitly Biblical such that it can only exist as a religious image. I might put that as "clear" myself but don't think of it so categorically

>>22779971
Depends entirely on the narration and exactly how you describe it I think. You could dance around the idea pretty successfully I feel, while still carrying over the general sense of the verse. It's well known, and the idea of him choosing between a narrow path and a "wide" one should be noticeable, especially if there's other religious parallels throughout the rest of the work. If it's isolated though, not many other Christian elements throughout the work, I could see it posing a bit more trouble for the reader, but for the most part I think it'd be fine. Guys like Joyce and Chekhov have put similarly subtle stuff, or subtler even, in their works, and people still figured it out eventually. Get test readers or post an excerpt here if you're in doubt. Cool idea though, good luck.

>>22779971
I'd probably miss it, or catch it that he's signalling something but not what. Like the other anon said, it depends on how much you're priming your references and adding them up into something. I prefer it when there are multiple layers of subtext and you're making double ended references that add to each other and work on multiple levels of the text. That tends to be stronger writing when appropriate and not limited by a given narrator.

Does anyone enjoy reading craft books? I know their utility is variable, but I enjoy reading about story and writing mechanics. It's also helped me figure out that I am a meticulous planner type of writer, needing to know the thing inside and out before I commit to writing it.

>>22780484
Depends entirely on the execution. Nobody is going to read a story that's 100% unadulterated crafting autism, but if the prose and characters are fun, why not?

The problem is, fun prose and characters are usually not the forte of autists.

>>22780042
Well this is the thing. I'm sort of on the fence about the scene in general. Like you said it's fairly well known but I'm not sure if, without the proper explanation or description per se they will "Get it" The challenge I'm facing is not wanting to underestimate my audience but I'm trying to be aware that (Obviously) people aren't going to analyse my stuff as much as they would Joyce or Chekhov.
>>22780444
There are a lot of biblical references throughout. Hopefully, it gets published and you guys can read it. I think of this place as existing on the more well-read side of the bell curve generally speaking so for you to miss it sort of implies to me that maybe it is vague to the point of meaninglessly. It's a tricky balance. Also there is another layer, not to gloat, assuming I can do it in the way I want it there are several layers to the scene. And the book too.

Thank you both for the feed back

>>22780518
I find that if something isn't trying to be obtuse for the sake of it, nor beating me over the head pointing out references, I engage with it on more levels than I'm usually capable of when there is a strong and self evident narrative that the allusions ornament. They help parse what is already there and taking the time to figure out the reference is rewarded. Not being particularly Christian other than being well read makes it difficult, and I find that most attempts are hamfisted or utter nonsense, but someone like O'Connor or Wolfe or sometimes Woolf presents a view that actually points to meaning in the text itself instead of making a reddit joke.

I'd worry more about the core text being apparent in and of itself, even if it is obfuscated and only one element of a given moment, such that a like-minded reader would naturally go there and one that is more secular would maybe get the allusion through the context of the scene itself.

That's something worth discussing in the general sense. I assume I'm handing a manuscript off to someone who is intelligent enough to read on that textual level even if they don't have perfect knowledge of my references and allusions. I think there's something to be said for, not writing down, but writing in a way a precocious child with the OED on the bookshelf could intuitively parse and interpret. I don't know, I read a lot of Diana Wynne Jones and there is something she can do where the mysteries and subtext are obvious if you...turn your brain off and stop trying to analyze it, or something like that. I want to say that male writers struggle with it but it's more like the fans as a whole aren't attuned to that kind of emotional, phenomenological analytic. I think allusions play to that, because it usually deals in what is absent or familiar but twisted. I'd like to hear some other thoughts on what you and anyone puts their imagined or real audience through and why.

>tfw other responsibilities
I WANT TO KEEP WRITING AAAAAHHHHHHH

is cutting your wrists actually painful? need this for my novel.

>>22781101
Never done it but it's like eating raunchy hot sauce, the experience of pain varies from person to person. It's like, the least real pain, with none of the pleasure that comes from a tattoo and the constant endorphins for hours. It's a temporary fix. I know pain and knew cutters so take it all as you will.

>>22781101
Already been done. Stephen King's "Gerald's Game".

>>22781101
There's one way to find out.

>>22779769
I don't agree with this. Bible quotes can easily be red herrings, plus a lot of quotes have multiple meanings anyways. It's only bad if characters only quote the bible for the same reason each time: when you want readers to believe what is said or to not trust the character.

Does the Ready Player One or Sword Art Online sort of worldbuilding still fly on RR or scribblehub? Is that still kosher?

>want to create a story
>it is most fitting for a comic or animated series
>can't make either of those
>decide to write instead
>my main strength is that I am the God of "ENTER" scenes
>these are only 10% as effective when done in writing rather than a visual medium
>also I can't draw tastefully horny extra content art of my characters for the fans, embellished with a nice little symbolic quote of course
Feelsbadman.

>>22781356
You're going to have to explain that to an old fag oldfag because the second half starting with whatever ENTER is nonsense.

I got an accurate review posting on the wrong board. I'm happy with what I have written in that regard.

>>22781385
May not be a common term on this board but it's also known under other names like "dynamic entry" or just making an overpowering appearance into the narrative. Imagine a powerful character showing up and dominating the scene and narrative and the other characters.
I think the term itself probably originates from plays, like "X, then Y. Enter character Z. Etc etc."

>>22781356
Webtoon?

>>22781397
Maighto Gai is how I would phrase that, I curbstomped everyone the way you do playing Slayer in GG in Ultimate Ninja 2.

So, you can only write good DYNAMIC ENTRY, Disgaea kind of reveals? Just keep introducing and killing them, metaphorically, until you get one that sticks around and keeps doing the thing. Midboss was a hot character for some reason.

>>22781402
I'd consider it if I could draw, but as I said, I cannot draw.
>>22781415
I understand almost nothing you said, but yeah my problem is mainly that I can choreograph cool scenes really well but that doesn't matter all that much in writing because it's basically impossible to accurately and completely convey choreography via text anyway.

Does anyone else struggle to write in the third person? What is so bad about first-person POV writing?

>>22781460
I have more issues with first person because I can't separate myself and my own manner from someone else, fictional who serves a specific purpose separate form my own, and would rather be god telling you what you want to hear. I pretty exclusively write in first person and like playful idiots like something I choose to redact, keeping another for amusement wishing they were interesting is a kind of pain that makes you write in first person like you wish they would. Otherwise you get this, my own thoughts and nothing else.

>>22781396
>phonenigger can't manage multiple threads
Shocking.

>>22781460
Your sentences are contradictory. If first-person were bad, then comparatively, you wouldn't "struggle" with third-person. So, I'm not sure what you're asking.
I prefer to only write in first-person if I have a specific tone that I want the character acting as the narrator to have, AND for that tone to imply something about the story. If I try to write in first-person in any other circumstance, it feels silly and pointless. Third-person limited, present tense, accounts for ~90% of my output.

>>22781355
Also how long do (you) take before you settle on an idea that you intend to serialize? I found it hard to get started or hone in on something that wasn't terrible (but only a few hours to actually work it out). It took me weeks.

>>22781529
I'll be honest here. I'd ask you where you're headed with that. I'd ask how old you are and painful and irrelevant facts about your life but I won't, I can smell them on you. I'd ask all kinds of questions and get all kinds of lies, so I won't.

How's the weather where you are?

>>22781503
>present tense
Vile. I hope you're an ESL where it's more palatable.

Whether or not he stands up to the occasion is the question.

>>22781613
Try me

>>22781617
>a story that does not have a framing device should be told in the past tense because... because.... NIGGER!
I bite my thumb at thee.

>>22781639
You failed to read the atmosphere and respond to the question. You're underage and/or autistic. Don't expect a reply.

>>22781503
Let me rephrase. It is widely claimed that third person is preferred over first person writing. Why is that?

>>22781474
For me, the challenge is narrating from this god perspective. I feel that I always write from the perspective of a specific character. Even when I describe things as objectively as I can there is always a hint of subjectivity.

>>22781663
i was giving you an opportunity to expand on your midwit read

Writing is hard. This is maybe my answer to /wg/

>>22781664
You're describing things from the position of the asshole telling the story. I think Cervantes or lady Murasaki was the first to shake hands with the reader and cement that you're allowed to do whatever you want as long as they have a good time and don't feel too raped by the end. We all know we're reading a story and go along with it, just don't fuck that up. I'll follow you to the depths of autism to prove a beautiful point if the rest is engaging. Tell me a shaggy dog story but let me know that's what I'm reading somewhere along the way. No shit it's subjective, you read for something interesting instead of staring out the window like a rube.

first person is easier to write effectively, especially if you're writing slop. i strongly recommend it

>>22781723
Own your shit by replying to a post.

>>22781709
if your goal isn't just performing on /wg/ try being succinct. you're not interesting enough to take that much time saying so little

>>22781727
Then summarize without missing anything, mister microdickfiction.

>>22781726
it wasn't a reply to anyone, i just saw perspective being discussed and i wanted to share that with someone who might not know what to think.
which comment do you think that would be a relevant reply to?

>>22781731
i hope you break through your 20 year old female college student phase sometime in your next few posts

>>22781732
Probably the one that kicked off the discussion: >>22781460

>>22781741
Reply to the question or get friends and a job and a girlfriend or fuckbuddy so you don't have to spend time on here.

>>22781745
>what's so bad about..
thanks. well, my comment was barely on topic anyway.
perspective is a tool, no? i really don't want to get started on how some fag might have an opinion of one over another
'the saw is better than the screwdriver'.. cool

>>22781757
ha, you never had a read on me. i'm actually super cool

Is there any good software that syncs your material between mobile and desktop? I know google docs does it but its rather clunky for creative writing. Preferably free of course...

>>22781436
Just learn to draw dude it'll take a couple years but then you'll be able to make webcomics at the least
Don't let artfags trick you into thinking illustration is something only SPESHUL people with SPESHUL talent can do, it just takes diligent practice

>>22781785
I email myself throughout the day. ne'er has something of value spurted forth from my thumbs alone.

>>22781791
Ok

Anyone have something helpful to say?

>>22781794
I was going to help you out but you were being an asshole to >>22781791 so now I'm not going to help you.

>>22781785
windows has some new system i believe (edge, windows and 365). with the goal being that you can easily bounce between them. i don't use it but you might want to look into it

>>22781802
good
>>22781807
thanks looks perfect :)

>>22775905
Highschool DXD already did it

>>22775905
hook already did it
the lost boys, too

>>22781868
>Lost Boys
>femboys
They were a bit faggy, but a far cry from genuine androgyny, must less female (male).

>ahem. I clear my throat and mount my humble pizza lectern, ready to deliver the week's pizza homily to my urban congregation
tle 'sars 'tle 'sars 'tle 'sars
>one lone individual stands to join me
'tle 'sars 'tle 'sars 'tle 'sars
>slowly, the chant grows in intensity as more and more individuals lend their voices
'tle 'sars! 'tle 'sars! 'tle 'sars!
>a washerwoman opens her window, the cabbie exits his vehicle blocking traffic, a mutant hobo peers out of the sewer grate
'Tle 'Sars! 'Tle 'Sars! 'Tle 'Sars!
>the streets become thronged with a joyous multitude, led by toga-wearing catamites
'TLE 'SARS! 'TLE 'SARS! 'TLE 'SARS!
>passing ETs look down quizzically from their saucer as the thunderous refrain rises to the upper atmosphere
'TLE SARS!!!! 'TLE SARS!!!! 'TLE SARS!!!!
>God awakens with a snort, enthroned in heavenly state, tells the angels to hush as the far off strains of pizza induced harmony echo up to the very halls of heaven, bringing a slight smile to the deity's eon-worn face
>hard cut to the infinite void, the reaches beyond the reaches........and through the infinite veils, a reverberant whisper, like a child's...
'tle 'sars

>>22781723
Stop whining. You just hate yourself

>>22781396
Based KurobaEx user

How do I reminisce in third person narration.

>with ease
This is fine.
>easily
NOOOOOOOOOO STOP USING ADVERBS IT'S POOR WRITING!! MORE FLUFF WORDS THAT PAD YOUR SHITTY WRITING IS BETTER... BECAUSE!

>>22782289
I assume you mean a specific character is reminiscing, and not you, the writer.
That character, at the story's "present", is in a specific time and place. Something in that time and place has triggered them to reminisce. Weave the past in with the present. One sentence is present, the next is past. The consideration of the past affects the present: the character is distracted, slow movements, savoring the nostalgia.
>>22782457
As I already addressed: adverbs are fine when they meaningfully modify the verb, like in your example. It's redundant shit, like "completely motionless", that's a problem.

So hypothetically if you were writing a story about a loser autist who is obsessed with swords becoming the vessel of a demon who gives him superhuman powers and is secretly eating at his life force. Said demon convinces him that he is the descendant of a famous samurai. What power would you give the autist that makes him strong but not supremely powerful. Ideally something to where the sword is an after thought but in his brain he thinks he used his sword master techniques.

I want to write SoL but its hard to tell when peoples "its so boring, nothing happens" criticism is warranted or if they just don't understand SoL.

Gonna pitch next week. Dunno how to feel about it. I know I'll shine but how bright is right?

>>22782605
>hypothetically [run-on sentence]
Jesus fucking Christ, have some confidence, you faggot. Now I have to read your post multiple times to figure out what the fuck you're trying to ask.
Why is an autist "obsessed" with this idea being given superpowers? Is this sword-as-vessel-of-demon thing really happening? Why the fuck is the sword secondary "in his brain"?
Try your post again with a bit more clarity, but my preliminary recommendation would be to scrap the idea. If you, yourself, have no idea how this specific "not supremely powerful" ability works, then the premise is less-than-half-baked.

>>22782605
His sword has the ability to cut anything he thinks he can cut. He has to really believe he can cut it though not "Oh maybe I can..."

>>22782629
You want to write solitaire?

>>22782635
NTA but that's very shonen-y
>ugh I can't win, I'm full of self doubt
>nooooo don't attack the ones I love! (he wins)
>>22782636
Slice of life silly

>>22782289
Describe a character reminiscing.

i took creative writing in high school and college.
took philosophy with daily journaling from reading selected texts.
i did newspaper in highschool but not in college.

i think i like journalism better than creative writing.

>>22782642
Hello, Hemingway. I see reports of your death were greatly exaggerated.

>>22782639
>Sword autists powers are shounen like
No shit, where do you think he got his obsession from? The History Channel?

>>22781785
Anything with that functionality is storing your data in "the cloud" (someone else's computer).

>>22781723
What's with people getting opinionated about shit like first person vs third? Are people just that desperate to carve their personality into everything?

>>22781460
I struggle to write

>>22782645
hemingways autobiographer published hemingways greatist work.

>>22782655
This is even more succinct than the baby shoes story Hemingway didn't write.

>>22782657
But it's nonfiction

>>22782650
so

>>22782667
So 1 - Google Drive/Docs is already the best you can get, and 2 - searching independently with that term will let you figure it out for yourself.

>>22781723
>first person is easier to write effectively

No, it's not. You're just blinded to the problems, because the tense is too familiar to you.

Writing YA. Is this too much dialect in the dialogue or should I keep it at this level.

>>22781192
habitual bible-quoter detected

>>22782891
I have no problem reading it, but it might be a bit over the line. "So whit yer gonnae dae" is the part I imagine most youngsters/uneducated countrymen would struggle with.

>>22782891
Seems about on par for YA, maybe even too smart.

>>22782891
It's readable, but also completely unnecessary and feels like it's just there for the hell of it

>>22775860
I dig it, it kind of reminds me of a fiction-prose version of Friedrich A. Kittler.
Keep up the good work, anon.

>>22782898
Yeah I worry dialect might be alienating when I'm aiming for the lesfic audience.
>>22782900
Smart how? Like too quipy?
>>22782905
I basically want to write a YA romance version of the tv show Skins but set in Glasgow. That's pretty much how people here talk, probably even toned down a bit.

>>22782926
You could write the most retarded, repetitive, uninspired drivel and argue that's how people actually talk, but it's still not a pleasure to read.

Here's a question. Why is it that shit like pic related is so common here even among posters not trying to put people down? 90% of people who post here are always trying to emulate the very top-tier like Joyce, Nabokov, Tolstoy, McCormack, Dostoevsky, (Not really Beckett because you fags don't read him), Pynchon, etc. etc. and then you pick up any popular fiction now and the prose will be dogshit, the plot based on circular logic and complete sitcom levels of common sense defeciency.
Is it really worth attempting to hold to a standard most people literally can't even comprehend? I've read a lot of shit here over the years and my criticism has always been very light, especially in comparison to a lot of other people, and I see a lot of anons writing stuff that wouldn't look out of place if I was to walk into a book shop and pick up a "X prize winner". I think a lot of the stuff here is publishable and isn't as terrible as people make it out to be but I think a lot of seething fags ruin it. You might not become the next Joyce, Proust or whatever but fuck anons a lot of you are good enough to make it.

>>22782889
that's fair; to clarify, i meant: if you're writing slop, first person is more effective.
the reason being, for webseries slop, immersion (superimposition) is the name of the game, and immersion is inherent to that perspective. it gets you over a hurdle that newer writers might not even be aware of. they don't have to worry about making a relatable character while they constantly infodump with stat screens.
you probably get where i'm coming from now

Does anyone on /wg/ write science fiction? All I ever see when I dip in here is fantasy or SoL stuff.

>>22782952
I think those anons use the science-fiction general don't they? I've dipped into it very lightly if at all. Think Metro or a stripped down Blade Runner but I usually lose steam

>my MC's power list is 7 pages long
Now THIS is slop

>>22782948
>Is it really worth attempting to hold to a standard most people literally can't even comprehend?
Depends on what you're trying to accomplish. If you want to financially succeed as an author, absolutely not. If you want to be "known" as a great literary mind, that won't happen, either. If you want to write what you consider to be "quality", though, it seems pretty important.
>I think a lot of seething fags ruin it
Correct. PROTIP: when a post is both hostile to the point of absurdity and brief to the point of meaninglessness, it is a troll post. Second PROTIP: generals, by their persistent nature, attract particularly bitter spergs.
Just look at the gay, pointless fauxlosiphizing about 1st vs. 3rd person in this thread, or adverbs.
>>22782952
I think some dude was posting about cyborg maids within the last few days.

>>22782962
not me though, i'm constructive

can i talk to Travis? :)

>>22782952
like most others (i assume), i'll start off with an idea that is basically sci-fi, but choose the creative freedom of fantasy.
i also think that the ethical/societal implications common with sci-fi are so tired. i should probably figure that out, because i like the inherent grounding of sci-fi. i just don't want to work on keeping it plausible.

CHAPTER 1,2,3 OF LITRPG FOR ROYALROAD
https://filebin.net/7vztwixh6lm2z70c
send opinions
>>22779974
here bro

>>22783002
I'm going to steal it and upload it first. Heh, zako.

>>22776623
https://github.com/Kino-Man1/FFF-Unlucky-Guy

here the github
>>22783012
too much kino for you anon.

can i talk to Travis? :)

I'm gonna write a short story about a 40 year old homeless man who becomes infatuated with a young naive religious volunteer who he eventually abducts.

Shawn woke on the yellowing mattress with pangs of hunger. It’s been three weeks since he ditched town and started squatting in an abandoned condo across from a LaundoMat in Denton, near his brothers house. He had had child support issues in Mansfield, so he ran. Shawn never let his problems catch up with him, he was always able to slip away, loping like a coyote from one to another. This wasn't the first time he had been homeless and he relished the freedom it brought. Responsibilities have always dragged on him like a net; running away was the knife he used to free himself.
The Salvation Army gives out free lunches Monday through Friday, and it’s become Shawn’s most reliable meal. He pulled up his pants and tightened his belt down to he freshly cut notch he had made the night before. He was excited to see Julia at the civic center. They had been eating lunch together and going on walks for two weeks now. Julia volunteers with the Salvation Army, and Shawn noticed the special connection they had the moment she smiled at him. Shawn wants to get married, and it’s clear to him that she is the kind of girl that likes to be pursued. He decided to pursue her despite her refusal to give him her cell-phone number, or let him into her apartment. He knew it was just a case of cold feet.

>>22783315
>religious volunteer
>Naive
So Humiliation porn

>>22782948
There's a screencap that gets posted occasionally about the futility of prose perfectionism against having an imaginative, engaging story that people actually want to read. It has to be said that there's limited value in subjecting excerpts to the prying of autistic /lit/ posters because of this. If you're serious; actually serious about understanding the level of your writing, you need to put your work up for critique somewhere other than here. That means abandoning the cover of anonymity. You won't find non-flippant critique if you don't. This general can get you up to a level of basic competence but it can't tell whether your writing will engage with your potential readers. Facing the potential (and to be brutally honest, the inevitable) embarrassment of open 2 way interaction with your critics can. Nobody ever became a good author without suffering horrendous embarrassment.

>>22783315
Your tenses are all over the road. Every third sentence switches from past to present or back, and there are some switches within the same sentence. This is the kind of error that arises from not doing even a paltry shred of editing or self-evaluation before posting. Just read it back to yourself aloud as you go.

>>22782948
>I see a lot of anons writing stuff that wouldn't look out of place if I was to walk into a book shop and pick up a "X prize winner"

That only goes to show what a poor judge of writing you are. You look at actual award winners and even if you don't like the genre or the subject or the characters or the style, or anything, their prose still has completely different pull compared to anything here. There are clear building blocks those books are made of, presented clearly, succinctly, and with a personal voice. There may not be "art" in there, but they simply do what they set out to do.

But most of the samples I see posted here are just aimless rambling aping the style of somebody else, and it's clear the writer has no idea where they want to take the narrative, nothing to say, and don't know how to present it. The things that even the cheapest published slop have are missing. The things that actually make people want to read books.

What should I use to upload? Something like 17 pages. The formatting and font of pastebin is absolute trash.

>>22782948
I think it's good that people itt want to clear a high bar. No one posts their work here to get pats on the back and amidst the exaggerated hostility sometimes you get interesting feedback.

If no one is going to publish you, you might as well write as best you possibly can.

>>22783481
to be fair, most people only post excerpts.

>>22783497
That's irrelevant. Pick a random page from any (non-meme) book you have in your shelf. There's immediately a clear thread to follow. A flow. One thing leads to another, things make sense. You can infer many details you don't know based on how the characters behave. A good book hooks you in a couple of lines.

Here people often post the first page of their story, the most important page, and you wouldn't even be able to tell it's the first page if they didn't say that beforehand. Many times, that first page is more confusing than a random page cut out from 2/3 into a longer novel. And that's never a good thing.

>>22783481
>That only goes to show what a poor judge of writing you are. You look at actual award winners and even if you don't like the genre or the subject or the characters or the style, or anything, their prose still has completely different pull compared to anything here
You gonna sit there and act like the anons posting here aren't posting things as good as Normal People or fucking Rupi Kaur?

>>22783546
Yes. I've yet to see a work here that was even properly finished.

>>22783481
I agree with all your points. Just want to add that no matter how good your prose is, the content always beats the presentation. Hundreds of thousands read litrpg slops everyday, but not even with james joyce level of writing would you make them read a page of your book. Or that is as far as marketability is concerned. So if you want financial success, write what people want to read. And no, there's literally no market for literary books, so you might as well write for yourself only and stop caring about other people's opinions if those are the books you want to write

>>22783497
They have nothing more to show. If you're acquainted with other writers' channels, it's a sign they have nothing to show. Anyone else drops most of a coherent first draft at worst. These look to me like exploratory writings that have nothing driving them and nothing informing them. Even the lowest forms of writefaggotry have higher standards for presentation and therefore a more amenable audience to pick it apart.

I don't like workshops or creative writing exercises but anons would benefit from putting in real work for real critique, somewhere that isn't here. I don't like /wbg/ but the way they present reference docs and hash out technicalities and mechanics is a better show of writing than this. I don't think this thread is bad, but it's superficial.

>>22783552
Oh you're of those
>NO YOU CAN'T POST ROUGH DRAFTS OR SCENES YOU MUST HAVE FULL EDITED AND PROOFREAD WORKS, IS THAT A COMMA SPLICE??? AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
fags.

>>22783553
I know this is a bait, but I'll bite. There are many, many works of literary fiction out there with riveting prose that hook you in ways no litrpg ever could. Most kids just don't find them because they're in the "ewww books" phase and their teachers suck. They'll read things that are closer to their interests and don't have that old junk stigma.

Resorting to mindless pandering and tropes because your writing sucks and isn't popular is NOT the answer. Never is, never will be. You will still suck and probably fail again. Learn to write first. Learn to communicate. After that, even if you choose to go the way of slop, you'll have a massive advantage over those who tried to take the easy way. OR, you will be able to write the story you actually wanted to tell, the way you wanted to, the way other people can also understand.

>>22783574
>what, you think my rough, unedited draft that I didn't proofread is worse than an actually published book, this can't be real! I must personally insult you now!

What were you even trying to say?

>>22783592
>There are many, many works of literary fiction out there with riveting prose that hook you in ways no litrpg ever could.
I will repeat this as loudly as possible for you to understand: THEY DON'T CARE.
In fact normalfags recoil from reading any remotely challenging prose. And sure they are riveting to you, but the brainwashed mass search for cues like a pavlov's dog to like books. They absolutely demand certain elements to be in a book to even begin to read it.

I'm not saying this to excuse myself from improving. I strive to write with quality, no matter what it is, but the truth that can't be denied is at the end of the day the content is what matters. Sure a well written slop will find more success than a badly written one. But even the latter would have more chances to be read than the most beautifully written book you can ever write but about subjects no one cares about.

Do people actually come here for real critique? Personally, I come to procrastinate. Were this general churning out good writing on a regular basis I might think differently but I honestly can't remember the last time I read something from here that I would unreservedly call good writing. There are some things with some merits but this community such as it is doesn't have any credibility as far as producing good writing is concerned. People who do post excerpts, already the minority, are mostly quite content to shit out some barely revised slop with no particular artistic intent riddled with basic errors. Either everyone with actual ability is holding back because of autistic introversion and the shitty discourse culture or none of us can write well at all.

>>22783601
>I only expect full edited novels to be posted on a writing general of a 4chan literature board.
>Nothing is worth criticism unless you've actually already finished it
Wew

>>22783631
>>22783002
Pls critique

>>22783620
Poorly written published successes are greatly outnumbered by poorly written failures of all stripes and comprise a miniscule sliver of all the shitty, derivative dogshit that gets written. I would venture that beautiful writing is published and read at a far greater rate. In any case, the ability to write beautifully can be applied to whatever cynical purpose might please you. Being able to write "challenging" prose should mean that you can write unchallenging prose that also has the vividness that makes people want to read it because that ability is founded in an understanding of what people take off the page.

>>22783631
Anyone who can write is into some pretty niche shit, if the backchannels are any indication. I have no interest in litrpgs or the kind of fantasy that autists are into so there's nothing to reply to, the same goes for those with more literary aims. The shitty discourse is the main problem outside of that. Criticism is a mutual investment and this place isn't for that. The association with this place also doesn't help.

What I notice is that those who post excerpts don't want to discuss their work and the aims they have for it and anons in general don't care about craft and can't engage on that level. When was the last time you saw an outline dissected or themes discussed? It's purely superficial shouting into the void, mixed signals and noise.

>>22783632
Who are you quoting? I never said anything like that. You're the one who started claiming anon's half-assed excerpts are better than published books. Which is ludicrous.

>>22783710
Perhaps it would be a better use of our time to talk about how polished presentation better serves the author. My old group demanded nearly complete drafts for anything shorter than a novel and went hard on content and devices used over stylist concerns and prosody. The authorial voice and aesthetic was most often the result of criticism and more pressing concerns of what you were trying to do in the first place.

>>22783492
Github or gitlab. People can propose changes

>>22783733
Giving feedback on anything that isn't as finished as the author can make it by himself feels pointless to me since everything is (hopefully) still a subject to change. And commented points might not even be there in the final draft.

It's like, anon presents an apartment building under construction and asks, "what do you think?" Well, it's unfinished, of course it's an ugly mess. All I can answer is, "is the base waterproof? Can the ground hold the weight?" And anon has no idea what I'm talking about, he just wanted to hear how stylishly sparkly the windows are. I'd worry about windows after there's a roof and walls.

>>22783776
(To clarify, I don't mean the whole novel/novel series should be finished, just that the excerpt shared is edited and proofread at the very least.)

>>22783776
>"is the base waterproof? Can the ground hold the weight?" And anon has no idea what I'm talking about
Well said, although for me it feels more like someone selling some shit on craigslist and all they post are a few blurry photos in a dark room that don't even capture the pertinent parts of the thing they're trying to get rid of. They're either grossly negligent which turns me away, or trying to hide something which is also shitty.

I think this is a reflection of poor preliminary work and a failure to engage in that kind of foundational discussion that's like pulling teeth with new and weaker writers. They can't answer questions, are cagey about revealing needed information that is required to hash out what needs to be done and don't have the big picture in mind because they've written nothing. Stronger writers come with something to show and have it ready for being torn apart and put back together, they want to get rid of it at any price in a sense. They also know that there's a context and buildup to their little pet monologues and scenes that needs to be written for the scene to do what they want it to.

I don't see much like that, where someone comes and says "I have this and this and want to do this with it, here's an outline of the rest, I'm having problems here with xyz before I can put the rest together and write it".

Is anyone here stupid enough to be tard published?

>>22783883
Haha, not me, I'm a genius that will only reach the peak of my popularity 100 years after I die.

What's the easiest way to tell if an ability is going to be too plot-breaking for a story to work around it?
I want to write a story where future sight is portrayed in a logical and consistent way for a change.

>>22783972
Work yourself from the end of the plot to see if the power can solve every single problem protag has.

>>22783883
this seems like cope. i hope that's your intention

I want to practice writing, but I don't know what to write about. It's not that I have writer's block per se, I just don't know what to start with. I haven't done any creative writing since middle school. What kinds of things do you guys write in your spare time?

>>22784049
Write trash, shitposty stories, so you don't feel bad about ruining a good concept with your mediocre writing skills.

>>22784049
>What kinds of things do you guys write in your spare time?
Vignettes and short stories about nothing in particular. I'll throw down an idea from the pile and see where it goes.

>>22782891
They say Paw no Da you idiot

>>22783673
In the past I have participated in the crowd editing of a couple of works that were posted in their entirety on here and some of the discussion in those cases managed to reach a bit higher up the ladder than the prosefaggotry which dominates most discussion, but yes the format overall encourages anonymous low effort content for anonymous low effort critique. The difference in those exceptions was of course the partial shedding of anonymity. The person you were responding to was recognisable and probably grew to recognise you.

>>22783636
Ok, but be warned that all I know about LitRPG I learned from reading posts here.

The general narrative feels very distant from the characters' experience. The name of the game with this type of literature is audience superimposition. They have to get what your character is thinking and feeling in every passage. Essentially you should be describing things as the main character would see them. Where there are contrasting viewpoints (that of the uncle on the first page, for example) you should be framing them through the main perspective. Your narrative is watching these characters from afar, which is not going to help readers empathise with the protagonist, which should be your highest priority and the principal aim of every sentence you write and every word you choose. Golden rule. Besides this it's also rather inelegant and wordy, but this problem is secondary to the first one.

Dialogue is pretty decent. It's very anime, but I gather that's a good thing in the context. It serves the golden rule of webserial grift writing mentioned above much better than the narrative does because it is anchored to the personality, goals, and perspective of the main character.

Evaluated through the aforementioned golden rule of webserial grift writing, the themes and direction appear to be strong. The conflict of youthful ambition and idealism vs old pride and cynicism is good, I would think (see opening caveat though) as is perseverance with being deemed a loser, and proving your worth. What is happening in the opening scene is effectively the MC deciding to take control of his own destiny and embarking on a new life. That transition should be the opening's focus. Is he freeing his nature from prior repression or repressing now it so he can fit into his new world? Keep him in the driving seat; in the focus of the narrative. I would, for example, provide the exposition through the medium of the MC's interest in those subjects. He knows about the lore and other characters because he personally gives a shit about them, in accordance with aspirations that led him to where he now is. I'd think he would be excited to see all these different nationalities and representatives of famous dynasties. Work that angle.

tl;dr: from what little I know about it, you have something workable but you need to centre on your MC better for audience investment

>>22784049
Write about something you're interested in. Shitting out words for the sake of shitting out words will result in soulless sludge that won't get you anywhere. I got some of my early inspiration from concepts video games had that I wished they'd done more with.

>>22784219
I remember those early days where anons were more concerned with entertaining other anons and both the writing and critique were better for it. I think having a public process such as that can be enlightening but the culture no longer supports it. Or rather it would be an experiment in seeing who the fuck anon is anymore. I should polish up some throwaway stories for consideration and review and see what happens. I haven't written anything funny in a while.

>>22784219
Thanks for you review
>I'd think he would be excited
He is in a family of merchants, so he has explored thousands of places; therefore, making him 'Naive' would distort his nature.
>MC's POV
On the contrary, I want the world to be real, and the characters not to exist solely to glorify the MC. The MC will be slowly discovered through interactions with other characters.

>>22784217
No they don't only yanks say that

>>22783972
How is fucking future sight not absolutely broken in every way? There's a reason writers usually give it to enemies.

>>22784444
It IS broken, but you can, theoretically, still make a story worth telling in spite of such a thing being present within it. The fact that future sight, in its pure form, doesn't usually get shown is something that already contributes to making the story worthwhile.

>>22784478
If the future was "read only" and couldn't be changed in any way, it could make for a pretty dramatic and tragic story, but I reckon that's not what you're going for

for any anons who have worked with publishers/agents, do they still have a preference for microsoft word? I was thinking of buying scrivener and I was hoping that wouldn't bring up future difficulties. I also dislike cloud shit and don't want to download MS shit.

>>22784049
Depends on what sort of thing you're interested in. When I was starting off (and even now) I was paying a lot of attention to the mythical method, so I would find folk tales, hagiography and martyrology, elements of myth, etc. and reconfigure / recombine them in fun ways. Folk tales especially are nice since the structure is very barebones and intuitive, so they're easy to expand upon. Granted this lends itself to somewhat of a fantastic tone, but trying to reconfigure these things into mundane occurrences can also be an interesting challenge. But fundamentally just take some image / scene / phrase that has stuck with you and make something of it. Follow your gut.

Also try having some way to write down little phrases / thoughts throughout the day, can be easier than just sitting at your desk and bashing your head for ideas.

>>22784505
There's not really such as thing as "read only" future sight. The point at which you view the future, your reaction the future information is already taken into account, so you DO have influence over it.

>>22784337
My pleasure. It is infinitely preferable to discuss someone's actual writing over arguing/commiserating with other anons about how there's no/inadequate discussion of anyone's writing.

>making him 'Naive' would distort his nature
This is kind of what I was talking about. You shouldn't need to tell me this information after I already read the thing. It should come through in his characterisation via narrative and dialogue. This is one of the reasons a fairly distant narrative voice - ie distant from the character - is a problem with the piece overall. I can't tell when you're author infodumping me or the character is reflecting on his own knowledge.

>I want the world to be real, and the characters not to exist solely to glorify the MC
I think you may have misunderstood me there. It's not about everything glorifying or revolving around the MC, but about his experience being the tangible connection between the reader and the world/story. If people are ignoring him and major shit is going on that he's not part of, we should be watching it through his eyes. That, him getting sidelined and giving us a sidelined POV, could be a pretty powerful aspect of his characterisation, support a theme of proving yourself and rising from obscurity, and make him relatable to us, the lame side characters of the real world.

Would you read a story about a mentally ill NEET which involves no other characters but himself doing weird shit?

>>22784538
no, I think schizo NEET has been played out.

>>22784543
In that case, can you recommend me some good books about it?

>>22784551
osamu dazai, no longer human. samuel beckett's moloy.

>>22784538
A short story, perhaps. Where would you be going with it?

>>22784543
The same anwer as always: it depends on how well written it is

>>22784533
>I can't tell when you're author infodumping me or the character is reflecting on his own knowledge.
Great point.
I will fix it, thanks anon.
>That, him getting sidelined and giving us a sidelined POV,
Imagine observing an object from different perspectives; MC will be the center of the story, but in each chapter, various characters will interact with him, forming their own opinion.

>>22783972
>"ability"
>logical and consistent
Make your magical system hard. Given specific rules for how the future sight works. Bullet points of examples:
-cannot see anything sooner than 1 hour from now
-cannot see anything further away than 100 years from now
-cannot see the past (duh)
-future sight expressed as a POV vision; full sensory experience, BUT limited scope of information (ie, a single soldier on the front lines might think a future battle is going poorly because they see all of the death and destruction)
-because it is a vision, the seer is vulnerable while the vision is occurring
-visions are not an innate ability like epilepsy; they can occur at a time and place of the seer's choosing
-at-will seeing is because they are hallucinogenic effects of a potion; the active ingredient is a rare, expensive substance called unobtainium that can only be obtained from the hotly-contested lands of Plotlandia
-they are NOT visions of the future; they are extremely accurate predictions of the future; this voids all time travel-related plotholes, and addresses the question of why someone would even want to see "the future"
-vision requires focus and a specific drive: seer wants to see the results of a specific battle they expect to occur = good, seer wants to see "how to become the emperor of everything" = bad; generally, anything that can be seen through a specific viewpoint works, anything that can't doesn't, because the potion isn't a god whispering secrets to you or IS a god whispering secrets to you, but wants to keep that under wraps

>>22784637
>MC will be the center of the story, but in each chapter, various characters will interact with him, forming their own opinion
That's interesting. I like it. This will still rely on the ability to centre the narrative voice on a character, of course. Basically, substitute MC with POV character and the advice is otherwise the same. Switching to a different character with a different personality should result an immediate change in the feel of the writing. Readers should be forgetting whose perspective it is at any point, and this is a danger with a more distant, floaty narrative style. Case in point, Jacques is seemingly referred to as "the boy" in a chapter with his own POV. That kind of narrative distance runs the risk of getting extremely confusing when he's also being viewed from other characters' POV at other points.

>>22784530
>The point at which you view the future, your reaction the future information is already taken into account, so you DO have influence over it.

DO you? Did you actually change the future after seeing it, or was you seeing the future and reacting as you do/did always a fixed outcome?

Like, you see a person get hit by a car and then try to stop it from happening, but discover that it was you trying to help the person that caused him to get hit by a car. Eventually, you have no choice but to admit there's no point in doing anything.

>>22784728
>view the future while trying to open a safe
>you see yourself putting in the right combination because you wouldn't try a combination knowing that it's the wrong one
>success
That's the sense in which you have influence.

>>22784746
That makes no sense. You don't know the combination, where does that information come from? When you look at the future, all you see is the combination you WILL try, regardless of whether it's the right one or isn't.

>>22784559
I don't really know. I've just been writing neet poetry for fun recently and some if it seems interesting to me. Maybe 4chonners could relate to some of it and enjoy it idk

>>22784802
Seeing the correct combination is the most likely future because it's the future that requires the least amount of coincidence. Something weird would need to occur for you to see the wrong combination, then input it anyways.

>>22784706
>the boy" in a chapter with his own POV
Sadly, with so many characters, I am forced to use a neutral narrator and dip it into the POV of a character in each chapter. I don't think it's the wrong choice; I just lack the technique.

>>22784811
I think long form neetcore poetry could be interesting. I feel like poetry has a sense of humor and needed levity to be entertaining. The usual takes are dreary or absurd in the worst ways. Indulgent for all the wrong reasons.

You inspired me to reminisce on my neetlife.

Today I
went out at night looking to do nothing
in particular.
Relieved myself
like a dog and howled like a dog
in the moonlight. I don't know why
I did what I did but
I did. Never again.
Tomorrow perhaps.

>>22785026
>free verse
Why even write poetry, at this point? I always felt slimy, doing this.

>>22785030
I thought it captured the chaos and malaise of the neet mind. Disorganized, rambling, not quite lucid.

>>22784972
Then you know what to focus on. Like I said the concept and ideas that I've read are coherent and seem to be suitable for the genre, but with the narrative prose in its current state I think it will struggle in such a competitive market as webserial grift writing. I was reading in the last thread when a couple of anons got immediately thrown off and distracted by the way you described the boat in the first paragraph and there wasn't even one word of discussion of anything after it. If one thing is holding your writing back, it's this.

Furthermore, you do a solid job of characterising through dialogue in this excerpt. Applying the same principle to narrative may not be as daunting as it appears.

>>22784811
I suppose directionless and nonsensical is thematically appropriate for NEETcore. Carry on.

Should I feel ashamed that the magic system I'm using for my fantasy story is lifted almost wholesale from another story I like?

>>22785129
Not if you're not monetizing your work.

>>22785086
Thanks for your advice anon.
I will try different methods and beta testing.

>>22785165
Well... How do I make sure I've changed it up enough?

>>22785026
cool anon

>>22785174
You don't. You make your own, or you seek the author's permission.

>>22785200
How does that square with all the stories I've read that copy and copy?

>5k word chapter
>POV character's name is mentioned 73 times
>2 other secondary characters that accompany him get mentioned 25 times

is that too much, and if so, how can I knock it down a peg?

>>22785233
You tell me. This is your post: >>22785129
I will now inb4 the most obvious cope.
inb4 "different anon here"
Even if true, irrelevant; you are now picking up the thread. That position is yours.
People do things with shame all the time. Dostoyevsky's "Crime and Punishment" is entirely about this (and the restorative effects of faith, or whatever). You didn't ask how to "get over" shame, or if you should even give a fuck about "doing the right thing".
>but you dodged the question! what about the OTHER PEOPLE?!
Two wrongs don't make a right. Did you really need me to tell you this?

>>22785234
Far too much. Knock it down by removing redundant exclamations, or replacing instances of the name with an appropriate pronoun. in cases where you go the latter route, make sure the structure of the sentence (and the surrounding sentences) doesn't lead to confusing pronouns; if there are two male characters, don't refer to them as "he", but other details about them, like "superior" and "subordinate", or "tall" and "short", or "snobbish" and "you".

>>22785243
No, that's my post. Your post is also my post, I'm actually replying to myself and using this thread as a blog to sort out my feelings.
So what you're saying is that I shouldn't worry unless I get a C&D and/or feel like an aspect of that system doesn't work with the story I'm telling?

>>22785167
Happy to help. WAGMI

>>22785234
Hard to say without an excerpt. Could you find a particularly dense area to show us so we can make suggestions?

Royalroad or substack for monetizing? I want paypigs for my fanfic.

It's generally been my policy as a writer to avoid self-inserts. I've always seen it as the sign of a weak writer.

However, recently I've realized that one character in particular from the cast of my current large work comes very close to being "literally me." He already has my hair and eye color, but I knew that going in. That's not as important as me starting to notice that he's picked up certain core elements of my personality, as well. All my characters are at least partly me, since of course you can only write what you know. But again, I've tried to avoid a character that's FULLY me. I don't want anyone to be able to point to this or that character in particular and say "that's Anon."

Fortunately we're early enough in the story that I can develop him away from being as much like me as he is now. I've just got to put some thought and effort into it. In that regard, I'm glad this came to my realization now, as opposed to later.

>>22785129
you shouldn't feel ashamed about copying someone else's magic system, but you should feel ashamed for using a magic system in the first place.
I really just do not care that the wizards in your universe draw their power from the sun or whatever

>>22785283
Don't be a pussy, plenty of classic authors basically wrote a version of themselves into a story. You're not the first or the last, etc.

>>22785276
depends

>>22785175
Thanks, it's a period I still draw upon from time to time.

>>22785306
This. Made me think of how F Gardner wrote himself as a character in Kabbalah of the Crocodile and he gives a speech about how we need to stop the jews.

>>22785451
Based. F Gardner is the Terry Davis of literature.

>>22785276
What's substack? I have only ever posted on royalroad and scribblehub, is that site any good? Also is there any point in posting on sites like wattpad or webnovel?

What would be a better story?
"The World's Most Powerful Mage Can't Find a Wife!"

or

"The Strongest Swordsman Is Unmarried and Desperate!"

Which one would be more autistic and fail at every attempt when trying to court women? I'm going to be browsing /r9k/ to see how all those losers fail.

>>22785276
What's stopping you from using both? I was planning on publishing everywhere I can. Royal Road, Scribblehub and even Ao3.
Although I've heard Royal Road is pretty puritan when it comes to including sex scenes in your story.

>write 50 books under 20k words each
>link each book at the back of every other book
>retire on piles of cash
It’s that easy.

>>22785604
substack is a bit similiar to medium but better put together. a lot of alt right people put articles there. you can monetize them, so I'm guessing this anon was to monetize chapters or short stories.

>>22785649
>mfw women talking

>>22785668
>alt right
You seem problematic and I dont appreciate you.

>>22785283
Stop coming up with rules. Do what works.

>>22785621
They're both horrible.
Second Q, obvious answer is the mage. That's basically Merlin's story.

>>22785234
It's not math. It's writing.

>>22784049
https://youtu.be/mFsBaa_MEzM?si=iic40BEwbnGxP3Qo

>>22775833

Why is it easier to write the novel than write the synopsis? Is this a bad sign?

>>22786281
A synopsis is snappy. You feel compelled to write more detail than is truly necessary for that purpose. Yes, it's a bad sign.

>>22786281
My synopsis is "a man runs into a murderous cat while collecting flowers and she hates people, he fixes it" and I guarantee you it's a great story.

I struggle so much sticking to third person past perfect tense

>>22786352
Why?

>>22785283
Ever hear of Kilgore Trout?

Her hair flowing in the wind, eyes sparkling reflecting the morning sunrise, a beautiful green wooly hat that matches her eyes, looking further into her eyes makes me feel as if there's an entire universe in there, such beauty... my heart can only take so much...

"What the fuck you looking at bruv?"

Her voice... it has a majestic tone to it, how do I explain it? something about the wavelength connects to my soul.

"Oi guys this prick keeps looking at me"

The way she stands up, there's such a grace to her movement.

Such power! such strength! Her punch actually knocked me out, ah such a glorious day!

I'm not sure how much time has passed since that moment but I'm still at the bus stop waiting for the bus, the problem is I think somebody took by bus pass and wallet...

That's fine. I had enough of my Job anyway, I didn't like my boss and it didn't pay enough for the rent and bills anyway, rising cost of living and all, I'll just find something else to do, maybe I'll walk to Scotland or something.

Yeah..let's take a nice long walk.

Ah my nose is bleeding, that's fine at least it will keep be entertained for a while. Drip drip drip drip. This blood trail will help me find my way back home from the walk..hahahaha. Ouch my laugh actually hurts, I must have fallen on my throat or something after the punch.

>>22786432


By the way I lost my home last night, got kicked out by these huge guys, I don't know why I was going to work this morning, having a job now feels like you're working for monopoly money, it's worthless.

"Excuse me sir"

Wow nice mustache.

"Oh hey did I look at you by mistake?"

Yeah I have a habit of staring at people, it's my main personaly trait, pretty cool right.

"Oh no sir, I happened to see what those people did to you, the woman and her friends robbed you in broad daylight, I called the police but they haven't turned up yet."

"Oh yeah sorry about that, I did stare too long after all, I apologise and I'll wait here for the police to arrest me"

"Goodness me sir, no you have it all wrong, I just wanted to give you back your wallet and Bus pass, I took it back from them"

Ah I see this person wants a reward

"Sorry msutache I don't have any money on me to reward you right now"

"...yes I know, it's because I'm holding your wallet right here"

"Ah yes that? Yeah you can keep it if that's what you're asking"

"...Sir are you feeling ok? Maybe you're in shock?"

Anyway that's when it happened, the mustache wasn't really a mustache anymore, I could see though his mustache...that's right behind that mustache was a man.

This man thought he could fool me haha.

"hahahahahahaha! your lowly tricks can't fool me! Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on you TWICE!"

"Sir...I don't understand, please just put down the rock, sir!! nooo!"

That's strange smashing is head in didn't reveal any of his tricks, how did he fool me the first time? I really thought the answer would be in his head

Wait...maybe the mustache was real after all, I get it, the mustache is a parasite that's controlling the human vessel..

"Somebody call the police!!!"

Ah my thoughts have been interrepted, what was I thinking?

Hearing sirens in the distance reminds me, I was trying to leave London and all the sounds releating to it, yes that's right to Scotland we go!

Wait I have a beard, what if I'm a beard and the human is the parasite?

Only one way to find out, I'll smash the human's head in with this rock so that it can no longer control me.

Ouch that actually hurts, ouch what the fuck haha, ousdfc....fu..ck

I thindkf...I..wuaz..wrongng...

The End

>>22786383
I keep slipping into present tense

Hello anons , I had 2 questions

1. How do many writers like King get so many ideas ? I have maybe 2-3 ideas for a story at best. But so many people like Noah Hawley , King keep coming up with back to back ideas. How do they do it?

2. How to get started in writing screenplays?

>>22786528
King thinks very highly of his ideas https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQvmHFsLicY sorry, couldn't find a better link
he is also on record as being more of a gardener type, meaning that he'll start with a single evocative idea and then keeps adding shit onto it without any real structure or forethought
the result is that he shits out high word count books (that are usually trash) at a pace of 1 book / 1.5 years
question two: you just do. the hard part is actually getting them filmed: you just don't.

>>22784821
>the most likely future because it's the future that requires the least amount of coincidence
You just made that up.

>Something weird would need to occur for you to see the wrong combination, then input it anyways.
The kind of future sight I'm talking about shows the future and only the future. If you don't input a code, it shows you do nothing. Or, to not be left stuck there, you input something, and it's wrong, because you don't know the right numbers and that's what you see. The future is "read only" and being able to see it doesn't change it. Either you give up and leave, or keep trying in vain forever.

>>22786596
>a gardener type
raging antisemite?

>>22785283
My protagonist? My ideal version of me.
My antagonist? Literally me.
Random subplot side-antagonists? Literally everything I hate.
Random side character? Literally partially me but with a twist.

Everyone is literally me in literally my world.

>>22786612
>You just made that up.
Nigga, have you never heard of probability? If the future is required to match the vision, that means you're culling every possible future where they DON'T match, and this introduces a clear bias to the lottery for the true future. You have read too many shitty time travel stories where true prophecy is treated like a free space for hack writers to insert any result they want.

>>22786956
NTA. So you can choose what the vision is and expect it to happen? What if I envision myself lifting a car above my head and throwing it over a mountain?

>>22786995
You'll have a stroke since that's more likely to occur than a sudden, unrealistic feat of strength.

>>22786528
You turn off the filters and censors in your brain that have opinions about ideas before they even manifest. It takes a while to prime the pump but eventually you're overflowing with all kinds of ideas and have to start sorting through them for something that works for what you're doing. I use Austin Spare's 'as-if' principle that he ripped from someone else to get into the state of mind.

The exercise as it was taught to me was to pick something benign that you also don't particularly care for, and act as though you do. Sometimes there's a block when it comes to a real desire of your own. Note all the things that come to mind, eventually it becomes a sea of possibilities that keep growing off of each other. Then you go back and decide what to do with it. You may not like the idea, but you start enjoying what you do with it. Once you get a feel for the process, it's easier to pull shit out of your ass and judge whether you can use it.

Shit like >>22779218 or other prompts are both exemplary of the process and good starters. I don't think those prompts are particularly good, which makes them suitable because there's no pressure to do anything good with them. Hardmode would be taking an existing story and changing characters and situations so that you have to rethink the whole thing. I think it all starts with dumb improv shit but that fact is well disguised by the time anyone reads it.

Screenplays are just doing bits back and forth with someone, sometimes with a plot. I find it really obvious with Key and Peele being in the same room together, it's something you learn to do on your own. It's a state of play and a very old kind of game.

>>22786956
You're the one here trying to present an extremely improbable event as the most probable while disregarding causality without basis. What you're talking about isn't future sight but the ability to manifest the outcome you WANT, ie godhood

>>22787253
It's not manifesting anything, it's removing potentials that lead to a contradiction, then randomly selecting from what remains. It's the Novikov Self-Consistency Principle, and it applies to every form of static timeline model of time travel. In order to be useful, you still need to apply the bias in such a way that leaves behind vastly more favorable potentials than it does unfavorable potentials. If you're sitting on a bomb that has a 1 in 1 million chance to explode every second, trying to exploit future sight to guess a 1 in 1 million combination will not be safe, because the most likely non-contradictory future in that scenario is one where you explode.

>>22787283
When it comes to time, all theories are just science fiction. Not even scientists understand what time actually even is. The bomb explodes when it explodes, when the chemistry inside ends up arranged in a way suitable for a reaction. The probability of exploding is only man-made conjecture, an educated guess, because we don't have the means to see what's going on in there. but future sight would show you precisely when it happens and not some collage of Dr Cuckoo's consistency principles.

>>22787636
>>22787636
>>22787636

>>22787009
So, in the same way, if you try to imagine opening a combination lock, you get a vision of not getting the right number.

>>22787725
No, because that leads to a contradiction(you trying a different combination than the one in the vision).

>>22783972
Read dune. The prescience might inspire you