/lit/ - Literature

so we're gonna have one of these, an unreal, and an &amp thread up all time? :eyeroll:

>>22314661
It’s very funny because I’m pretty sure an unaffiliated troll is responsible for all of these threads. But even if the threads are an awful shit show, which they will be, they’re still free advertising, so I doubt anyone involved will complain

>>22314661
Gotta keep the hype alive to remind Farmer to hurry up with United Airlines 2.

>>22314661
These threads are being made by Gardner because the general rule is that you can have one thread up about a given topic at one time, and the jannies typically leave the first one up.

Why is he doing it? Shortly after Kabbalah of the Crocodile came out, Gardner came onto the Unreal discord to offer a shoutout video exchange with &amp and Unreal, but his terms were idiotic so both publications declined. Afterwards, one of the &amp editors went off on a huge rant describing “Gardnerization.” The process of Gardnerization is when someone sees another artist studying/practicing a new concept and then immediately cobbles together a low effort version of the same idea so they can claim credit for coming up with it first. Because that’s how they define success, so obviously everyone else does too. Two days later, Gardner released Horror’s Call Adventure (a cheap imitation of Ogden’s multi-author CYOA project) and then tried to take credit for the work Hartley did to inspire other authors through &amp, which several authors claimed as their motivation to advertise books on /lit/.

At one point, they all realized they were annoying people on /lit/ with their Drama Kid antics and discussed starting a general containment thread. And now we’re here.

>>22314792
Card won.

>>22314683
heres an excerpt from my entry into the genre
----------
The wizard brings the belt up to Hank "OK now for this part of the ritual you have, to be blind folded because that's very, important for receiving all the wisdom of the ages" the wizard explains as a matter of fact. "I understand and even though I'm, a little scared I really want to know the secrets, of the universe and so I will do this" Hank assures even though he wonders what is about to happen.
The wizard ties his belt around Hank's eyes and makes a knot in, the back when in faster than an instant Hank smells a really, bad smell that seems to be coming from the, belt and his eyes begin starting to water. "Wow that smells really bad is this, really necessary I don't know if, I can take this for very long" Hank pleads even though he's in no position.
"Quiet you little bitch I mean the blindfold is part, of the test and it's also a crucible because the man who emerges, from this ritual will be different than the man who, entered and isn't that all anyone can really ask for" the wizard assures Hank of his wisdom.
"OK if you say so but I hope it doesn't, take too long to receive your wisdom because my eyes are, making tears and not because I'm sad" Hank tries to relate his newfound experience. "This is only the beginning because now you have to, suck the truth of the universe out of a tube and the tube is, smelly and wrinkly and it will be all you can do to with, stand it but it's absolutely necessary for the ritual" the wizard explains with his years of knowledge.
"If you say so" Hank acknowledges "I do and also you may hear me make sounds during, the ritual but those are just magic words in an unknown, language and are also necessary for making sure you get all, of my wisdom so are you ready to start" the wizard gives last minute instructions and now his voice is shaking even more than it was earlier when it was shaking a little and Hank noticed that it was beginning to shake.

>>22315073
"I am ready" Hank states and that is all he can say because then a, tube gets shoved in his mouth and as promised it tastes really, bad and Hank winces and hopes he receives the wisdom really soon. "Ungngng" the wizard says as he begins the mystical incantation. The wizard says other magic words as the tube slides, in and out of Hank's mouth for reasons he can't understand but soon he, hopes he will and obviously it's part of the magic.
"No teeth!" the wizard suddenly shouts as the anger moves through his lips. Hank hopes he hasn't disturbed the ritual as he opens his mouth a little by a slight amount so that the magic can happen more better. It seems all is well as the wizard goes back to saying, magic words in the unknown language he talked about to Hank in, the past though to his untrained ears they mostly sound like moans.
The tube moves faster and faster then with a sudden motion it, moves slower and the wizard at the same time utters one long magic word that, sounds a lot like the other ones except for its length. Hank consults his memory and he believes that someone farted at about, the same time as the final magic word but he, can't smell anything that smells different than the tube.
The tube finally leaves Hank's mouth and Hank is grateful but then the wizard says with much weariness in his voice "swallow the wisdom and then the ritual is done". Hank realizes there is something slimy in his mouth but true to his devotion to the wizard he lets it slide down his throat and immediately realizes that something profound has happened.
"Why was it slimy" Hank asks even though he's in, no position to question the wizard "It's like ghost ecto plasm which, is also slimy there's a connection" the wizard imparts the profound truth. "Oh that makes sense so when do, I begin to start feeling the wisdom and oh yeah by, the way at what point can I see again" Hank doesn't want to sound ungrateful.
The wizard unties the blindfold which reveals to Hank the wizard standing, there and now he is sweating and looks tired which Hank decides is, probably the after effect of casting the spell all though he, doesn't want to ware out his welcome here.
The wizard stumbles back to his robe and begins trying to thread the belt into the loops again but he's having a hard time of it and Hank realizes what the wizard must of gone through to impart his knowledge in such a short time and hopes the wizard is OK and is no worse for weare.

>>22315073
United Airlines was funny because it was a painfully accurate portrayal of Gardner’s stunted worldview and childish writing. Like, there is absolutely nothing Gardner can say or do to convince anyone that he has not been made the victim of a justified literary flaying. Your thing is just a poorly-written rape joke.

Give me a book without descriptions. Nothing beyond: "PLOT as he walked through the dark forest PLOT"

>>22315090
>expecting Boswell to be able to write
Boswell is the only person on /lit/ with less talent than Frank. It doesn't surprise me that he fails to parody him.

>>22315090
its a parody of the turd himself, his writing "style", and his cocksure cluelessness, as well as his stunted worldview
this happens after receiving the wizards wisdom and eating a hot dog (which for some reason unknown to him sounds really good right now)
----------
Hank is continuing to perambulate along the boulevard when a few minutes later he feels a gurgling in the region of his stomach. He denies the gurgling and restates his previous statement that he's a big boy now and can have anything he wants on his hot dog. His stomach continues to gurgle and now Hank is not feeling very well atall. Then out of nowhere Hank realizes he is starting to commence feeling sick and has to find, a trash can really quick so he doesn't make a mess even, though his mommy is no where to be seen she'll still find, out because she has eyes in the back of her head and somehow always, knows that it was him that made the mess.
His eyes alight upon a trash can and he runs, for it and puts his head inside the opening and throws up all, the good hot dog he just ate. Even though he tried to apply years of throwing up knowledge to, his present task he still feels chunks of food go out his nose and now his, nose tubes hurt with what ever it is in throwup that makes him sting in side. Hank can't be sure even though he is usually absolutely certain about, everything thanks to his wide spread knowledge of stuff but maybe he, even tried to throw up out of his ears because now they hurt too. Hank is concentrating very hard on throwing up and is ignoring the world around him in a zen, like manor and that's deliberate so that's why it takes, him a long time to realize some lady is yelling at, him for no reason probably just that time of the month.
"Hey you student master what the funk do you think you're doing" he finally makes out what the lady is saying to no one in particular. Hank looks up and notices that the lady is staring right at him in, her ladylike way and although usually that means the lady is hot for, his body this time he feels it's different for reasons he can't extrapolate. Hank has no idea why she is staring at, him so the obvious answer is that she's, stupid and doing it for no reason at all. Hank guesses probably correctly that the lady has lid a very, sheltered life and therefore in conclusion she has never seen, anyone throw up and so he feels the need to explain the, details of real life living to her.

>>22314683
which one? the one that got hit by a missile? or was that one twa?

>>22315112
"It's called throwing up lady and it's a perfectly natural thing for a person to do when they just ate a hot dog even if they're really good at eating hot dogs some times these things just happen so what's your big problem anyway" Hank begins to try to repair the damage done to the lady from years of neglecting her basic duties of humanhood.
"You just threw up all over my baby that's what the problem is you pesthetic mother trucker" Hank thinks he hears the woman say but she's screaming so, loud that he finds her words hard to make out and in any case she totally, has the hots for him and that plus her womanly hormones are effecting her, judgement obviously but Hank will power through it like he does for all, his copious female troubles after all that that's a cross he, has to bare for looking so snazzy in and out of his robe.
Hank decides to try to smooth things, over with his natural charm "Well I had to find a place to throw up real quick so I, wouldn't make a mess all over the side walk I suppose you would have preferred, that or something and what was your baby, doing in a trash can anyway" he schmoozes in his classic way that he does when, he's the most popular guy among all the ladies in his room that he, imagines when no one else is around so he amasses lots of practice.
"That's not a trash can you suited cypriot that's a baby carriage" the lady starts making stuff up just to hurt Hank's, feelings but he's used to this sort of jelosy and so it, rolls off his back like a steel, ball baring down the neck of a swan. Hank looks at the trash can and it does sort of, look like a baby carriage in the cents that it has, wheels and a reticulated cover and blankets, inside but otherwise it's definately a trashcan. Hank is sad and he shakes his head side to side because he, has to share this world with a lady dumb enough to put her, baby in a trash can and wheel it around like that's, something a normal perosn would do or some thing.

>>22315115
Hank makes an amazing discovery that shakes the, foundation of the entire conservation to its core "Hey wait that's not a baby that's a little, dog why did you call it a baby did the, stork bring that to you or something" Hank triumps with the knowledge in his posesion of where babbies come from. "Well I consider my dog to be my baby which, is perfectly normal and anyway lots of people do that" the lady tries to make herself sound less, insane but Hank is too clever for her and it doesn't work.
"Look at the dog he is eating the throwup he, doesn't mind that I through up on him so why do you" Hank swoops in for the grand finale that will cement, his legacy in the anals of history of people who argue, with other people because it's their job to do so. The lady is speechless and so she doesn't say, anything and instead chooses to bask in Hank's old-time folksy, wisdom like he hails from another place not like Chicago. She starts shaking and Hank rolls his eyes because he knows what's, coming next but they're in a public place and she can hardly rip his robe, open and commence starting to get it on with him even, if she really wants to it's just not done like that.
"I don't let my dog eat throwup he only gets natural foods with, the finest ingredients and never any meat because I'm a, vegetarian and so I decided he would be too" the lady suddenly blurts out a series, of words in the language of English. "Your dog obvsiouly needs some throw upin his diet other wise why, wouuld he be eating it like it was going out of stile" Hank lowers the boom on this whole sorry epsiode. "In fact you should be paying me for, feeding your dog yeah how do you like, that so make with the dough already" he ends on a triumphant note which is, not unlike an E flat dimfinished cord whatever that is.
The lady pouts and scoffs since she can barely contain, herself any more since her womanly parts are awash with blood and, pining for Hank's manly body but rather than admit the obvious she, stomps away in order to get away from the, man that is turning her world up side down. "Hey you owe me money for that throwup" Hank shouts but she soon is lost in the crowd of the big city and she fades from sight like it was all some sort of dream. Hank would like to place the lady under the rest but, he can't seem to find a cop after all where are the cops when you need, them but as an aside he did take care of the problem himself so who needs cops.

>>22315111
lol your dumber than cartman trying to guess mysterions identity
https://youtu.be/sFWhgcLl-Rk?t=50

>Boswell was right about Gardner
It hurts

>>22315121
Let's be fair. Gardner was also right about Boswell.

>>22314661
I'd rather have more /hyperlit/ desu

>>22315121
Can I get some Boswell lore? I read Playtime's Consequences and the dude is a straight up sociopathic autistic little gerbil man but I seriously doubt he's hanging around on /lit/ harassing Gardner two years after no one cared about his book.

>>22315257
then why did reviewanon give his book 4 stars and limbo's rainbow 1 star

Gardner is shilling his crap again: >>22315548
Someone else is counter-shilling: >>22315826

Bump

Bump

Dead general. Gardner won.

>>22317892
not until he decides who wrote United Airlines and then writes a parody of that author's work

>>22317892
>>22317963
and answers >>22315427
gardner must have the memory of a goldfish

Let this shit die

>>22318802
not until gardner stops dodging his obligations
so in other words this general will go on forever

>>22315116
>1300 words about barfing on a dog
i kneel

Gardner is shill-spamming again...
>>22319408
>>22319439
Consider showing him how much you love his public self-stroking with a report for "advertising or begging".

>>22319453
Good work /lrg/! They're gone.
And for my trouble, I got banned for 15 minutes.
Once again, Gardner abuses his mod access.

>>22319474
>banned for 15 minutes
LOL that’s the pettiest shit I’ve ever seen

Bump

>>22319474
Gardner is scum desu

>>22319474
Post the real message Tyrone

>>22319474
dumbass ban evading nigger

>>22319474
>banned for "reposting/spamming" for making 2 posts
>in response to gardner's latest shill-spamming sperg-out
utterly pathetic
gardner is an insecure bully

Come up with the plot for United Airlines 2 and tell us what new and fleshed out characters you would want to see!

>>22322150
How about "Call Of The White House"?
Through a series of unexpected coincidences, Gardner becomes the President, and proceeds to run the U.S. right into the ground, all the while cheered on by Americans, who have become as stupid as he is.

>>22322150
After discovering Call of United Airlines, the real life Gardner leaves his Chicago penthouse for the first time and sets out to track down the author. As it turns out, the real world has more twists and crazy villains than anything ever dreamed up in the Horror's Call series.

>>22322209
Maybe the horrors were the calls we made along the way.

>>22322150
Call of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act. More /lit/ writers and schizos.

>>22322639
yes

>>22322639
What writers didn't make the cut of United Airlines?

>>22322798
How about including characters from the /lit/ books themselves? Can you do that?

>DMT MACHINE ELVES??

>>22322997
It's probably safer to include parodies of said characters, so as to stave off harassing DMCAs from an insecure bully.

>>22323667
What was the ad?

Guess who's shill-spamming again...
>>22323622
>>22323475
>>22323348
Let's see if I get banned as quickly as that poor sod from yesterday...

>>22323673
Behold, the ad/video that F. Gardner doesn't want you to see:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mic9tc7gDZ4

>>22323830
wtf why was he censoring this? I thought the video was mentioning him and he was being a sperg.

>>22315399
Nice digits.
What's hyperlit?

>>22323929
Because Gardner has burned through thousands of dollars, all of his self-respect, and the patience of everyone on 4chan in a desperate bid to become "le wacky 4chan wrong idea man" so anything which threatens that has to go. Meanwhile...
>something Gardner doesn't like gets posted
>thread goes unbumped for 8 hours
Really makes you think.

>>22323680
More of his crappy shill-spamming...
>>22324307
>>22324767
Reporting, and defeating, his sperging out is definitely part of any /lit/ renaissance.

>>22324953
F Gardner should do us all a favor and kill himself expeditiously.

BUMPP

>>22323680
>>22324953
All of his shill-spam posts got archived, and the only replies were either him samefagging, or anons ripping him a new one.
Just how clueless can he be? Does he have a total lack of self-awareness? Does he think the tactic that failed the last several hundred times is going to somehow work? Is he surprised to find the /lit/ catalog is watched closely by people who are totally sick of him? Does he think his meme is coming back?
He doesn't even seem human. He genuinely seems more like a tulpa...

So &amp best of comes out this week, right?
Or is it just &amp 018?

>>22326919
>he actually thinks the &amp best of is gonna come out

KEK

>>22326937
No, I only wanted your (You)

>>22326919
July is over and still no best of, very disappointing desu

>>22326891
It's probably a mixture of Sunk Cost Fallacy and a personal grudge against /lit/ for rejecting him.

>>22327642
Why not just have someone ghostwrite horror books instead of selfpubbed memebooks? Seriously. Just braindump schizoshit to a developmental editor and get a ghostwriter to do it. I wouldn't even be mad.

>>22327642
So it never occurred to him to...I don't know...improve at writing?
His quality plateaud at a very low elevation, to put it diplomatically.
Is this sperging out his way of admitting he knows he's writing as well as he ever will?

>>22327579
Lol wha the fuck did u expect? Shit aint happenin juss move on

>>22327650
I can't imagine there are many people who would find satisfaction in that.
>>22327666
Who knows? He's been at this for two years. If you think failing for this long is exceptional, you haven't spent much time in the online creative writing sphere. No doubt you could go into /wg/ right now and probably find someone who's been polishing up one novel for five years now and has not measurably improved it over the rough draft in any way, just changed a bunch of words around.

Bump

>>22327579
>>22327703
Fuck July.
I'm hoping to release today, which will really only involve dumping a GDrive link to a PDF in a thread. Might as well save(?) myself some bullshit by saying that now.

Was hoping I could crank out all the last things earlier and throw it onto /lit/ before dawn, but nah. Gonna try to get some sleep and hopefully get it off my plate later today. (ha)

>pic related
Not a very visually interesting spread of pages, but oh well.

>>22328426
Pic related is a better visual indication of the style in general; but it's from an older revision, so footers have changed a little and the text might not be aligned correctly in this one.

see ya fuckers

>>22328429
>Suburbpunk
>fathers
>father's**

>>22328426
>>22328429
Ari delivered bwos. Unreal in shambles.

>>22328429
Dno how I feel about two columns (depends on page size I guess) but this looks very good

>>22314621
>Krake's Law
qrd? google doesn't give me anything

>>22328426
>>22328429
Long live Powerpunk.

>>22328563
Anything that's a quadruped will, if male, fuck a white woman, and if female, be fucked by a white man.

>>22328548
Not every page is done two-columned, though since the pages are 8.5x11 it's generally the most compact way to get text on the page while keeping readability good (spanning the margin space with one wide column blows for reading); I'm working with a lot more pieces than an average &amp issue would hold, so density is important here. Anyway, pic related (though not final, same with everything else) is an example of a non-standard page spread that eschews the the full-spread dual-column style. Trust that I was pretty deliberate in the things that I did, so this isn't just something I'm slapping together without intention or forethought.

I'll also say now that this will probably need another day or two, though I doubt anyone who actually wants this thing to release gives much of a fuck. Not that I want to hang around in these kinds of threads, but I figured another sign of life would be good. Saves me some of the fear about sniping, at least.

>>22329141
Nice. I plan on buying this one.

>>22329285
I'm glad to hear it. It'll take me longer than the PDF to get it up on a printing service (planning to use Lulu), but hopefully not by much, and it should be a little cheaper than standard issues of &amp by nature of being only in black and white provided I can pare down the page count a bit.

>>22329340
Is it gonna be posted on the &amp website

>>22329553
No clue, I got nothing to do with &amp officially. My plan is to do a simple Github Pages site for it (doesn't require purchasing/renting a domain nor any hosting costs), considering the thing is ultimately unofficial and kind of its own entity. I look at it a little like a relic I'm trying to preserve, and I think making a simple, independent webpage without hosting concerns would be the most resilient option. It also gives me a little more control over it, which is important since I had to get copyright permissions for one of the illustrations I used, requiring a commitment to non-commercial use (likewise for a lot of the leniently-copyrighted stuff I ended up using). Ultimately the PDF will be floating around outside of my control, but having my own landing page looks better.

>>22329920
Cur? Since when are you a tripfag?

>>22327770
Failing to succeed as a writer for a long time is normal.
Refusing to accept the failure & relentlessly shill-spamming, same-fagging, and self-stroking to LARP as a success, as if everyone else is too stupid to see right through it...suggests a pathological level of narcissism.

>>22329920
looks mid desu

>>22330418
Since all the bullshit in the spring (and ongoing); I don't plan on sticking around once I release the thing anyway. And here's a little proof:
drive.google.com/file/d/14-TZPozX3fi2nKArBqHAjneG-mdx35hJ
(shared from the Google account I made last fall to organise everything).

>>22331181
Not everything is going to look exciting. My aim since the start has been to keep it relatively simple and maintain good readability/legibility, with illustrations mostly serving to complement pieces and break up the text (though there are a lot more than I originally envisioned). After the thing is done anybody can go and dump some sprinkles on it if they need the extra pizzazz.

>>22331263
>drive.google.com image
ew

>>22331263
>drive.google.com/file/d/14-TZPozX3fi2nKArBqHAjneG-mdx35hJ
Nice

>>22331263
Disgusting

>>22331263
>>22331277
>>22331407
>>22332030
I'm not clicking the IP grabber. Give me a detailed description of the image.

>>22332047
Download Tor

>>22331263
Bro I need a link to buy a physical copy

>>22332454
with isbn, bebbe!

>>22314621
Where is Legacy of Totalitarianism on this chart?

>>22332047
He just posted a picture of himself.

>>22332687
Ah, that takes me back.

>>22331263
>I don’t plan on sticking around
Good.

>>22331263
That photo is fucking gross

>>22329920
>requiring a commitment to non-commercial use
Amazon for zero dollars, or how will you print without commercial?

>>22329920
isn't all of &amp published into fair use?
it's very clear on the website

>>22336552
Migrate.

>>22336559
We just had a honeypot last month.

>>22336719
And what did that amount to? While you were doing your "honeypot" we've been building a magazine. Be more productive with your time.

>>22329141
>two days later
>still no best of

Typical.

>>22335980
The company Lulu allows you to put up print-on-demand items on their "bookstore" without collecting revenue, i.e., they will print it at-cost and I won't make a cent off it (some earlier &amp issues were hosted this way). You can also try arguing cost recovery if you figure the amount made will be below or equal the cost to produce, and while sometimes that argument is accepted, it's obviously murky; that's beside the point anyway since it'd be a silly risk and I don't want this thing to be out there to make money.

>>22336089
I'm talking about a specific photograph I got permission to reproduce; that required emailing the photographer's agent and signing an agreement saying I wouldn't alter it (beyond converting it to greyscale) or use it in a commercial work, among other things.

The written works (and logos, etc.) in &amp get dedicated to the public domain ("fair use" is a different thing about how you use something, not a class of copyright), but a lot of the illustrations/photographs are "stolen" (the editor has admitted to taking a lot from /p/, and he talks about it a bit in that interview he did with Unreal). So I can do what I want with the writing, but illustrations were all sourced from outside of &amp, taking care to respect copyright (normally this means public domain or Creative Commons works).

Even if this whole thing is pretty minuscule and unlikely to get attention from stingy copyright holders, I didn't want to put it out there and risk having it get taken down at some unknown date. Resilience, or whatever.

A side note on commerciality, being public domain means a work can be used by anyone for any purpose, including for commercial purposes. So if a company wanted to throw writing from &amp into an advert (and fucking with it to whatever degree they see fit), they'd be within their rights provided they gave attribution. No compensation for or permission from the author necessary. If you look at a place like Wikimedia Commons, most works (my guess, and excluding things that enter the public domain by law, of course) are released with a Creative Commons non-commercial licence.

>>22336925
Oh you know me, pal.

What is this thread about

>>22337940
Not your pal. Don’t give a fuck about your shitty word project. Just wanted to take the opportunity to mock you for your laziness and constant delays. &amp doesn’t need assholes like you associated with it. Release your Now That’s What I Call &ampTM and then do us all a favor and fuck off.

>>22337940
>I don't want this thing to be out there to make money.
Incredibly based. Too many retards and hacks trying to make a buck off this place. True art thrives in the absence of profit motive.

>>22338462
>True art thrives in the absence of profit motive.
While this is true, it's also a tremendous cope used by people who are largely unappreciated. I think you're the first person I've seen utter that phrase without it being an excuse for their own continued failings.

>>22337999
Lit Renaissance General. Few authors trying to make a serious push to advance the art or something

>>22337999
Discord trannies talking about themselves in third person.

>>22338479
My failings are due to me being STEM first, and /lit/ is one of a few hobbies.

>>22337940
there are people who create and people who walk in circles

>>22328448
(Thanks.)

>>22338534
This.

>>22339078
that's a 'dumb' apostrophe, unlike the one in "couldn't" 2 lines above...

>>22340383
((Thanks.))

I swear I've been going through and normalising all of the punctuation (proper quotes, apostrophes, em dashes), but I slapped that one in straight from the keyboard. Forgive me, anon. Plus I swear the things multiply; I thought I'd done a pass over each piece, yet I seem to find new fucked up punctuation hidden somewhere every other day. I'll being going over it all page by page before release anyway.

>>22329141
>three days later
>still no best of

Embarassing.

Why is it that every time I begin to take an interest in Christianity - in numerology, its certain aesthetics, the esoteric traditions, theology, et cetera - and then actually speak to a Christian, I feel nothing but repulsion from Christianity and hatred toward them?

They speak so earnestly and confidently about their faith and how they "know God" and "know Jesus", which is completely and utterly alien to me.

>>22340537
Religion is pretty broad, encompassing different communities with different traditions and interpretations. Many people that in them are normal people that do not dig into the ethics and supernatural the way that you do. "Knowing God" can mean something quite different for an individual, even under the same church roof.
What exactly disgusts you about it? Do you think it is jealousy or disappointment? Are you exploring this feeling in your writing?

>>22338103
Seconded.

>>22340463
Fuck off Ari Coon

>>22314915
Card only knows how to lose

ARISE

>>22330730
All lots shills are delusional narcissists desu

>>22330730
I've been in online writing communities for a long time. When I started, the big thing was trying to become the next Cracked.com. You and your e-buddies would make each other laugh over IM or proboards or whatever, and that would make you think you could be entertaining to a larger audience. Most people who gave it an honest shot moved on with their lives when it didn't work out. But I can think of a dozen people I've known who became legendary within small circles because of their incredibly stubborn refusal to either improve their writing or give up. They'd churn out daily articles of flaccid half-jokes about "10 Reasons Why Cartoons From My Childhood Totally DUNK NUTZ On Today's Cartoons" and then fill up their own comment section with sockpuppet praise for themselves. When people would offer advice, they'd reply with something along the lines of "I'm way too creative to follow any rules" or "let me tell you about my own personal comedy formula I've developed." When you'd really lay into them, they'd always try to take the route of "I'm actually very successful, I have emails from literary agents who I've rejected and sitcoms who want me to write for them, but I make enough merchandise sales to stay independent. Haha, no, I won't show you any evidence of this whatsoever, I don't have anything to prove to a jealous little troll like you."

What sets Gardner apart is that he actually follows through on the idiotic legal threats they all make when the audience they've chosen to inflict themselves on gets fed up with their bullshit and starts mocking them instead of ignoring them.

>>22329141
>four days later
>still no best of

LMAO

>>22326891
I can't believe I understand this post. Completely. I read her book not knowing who she or Tao were. I guess I thought I should, like I thought I should read Lena Dunham's book. I read her book and I understand this post.

>>22345169
No one should read Lena Dunham’s book

>>22346150
Idk I read it a few years back and it was weirdly interesting, in that it gave deep and penetrating insight into the mind of a deeply narcissistic and privileged person with a warped sense of entitlement.

>>22340537
"I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ." -Mahatma Gandhi

>>22329141
>five days later
>still no best of

As expected.

>>22346768
Go make your own magazine then, whiner.
Who died and made you princess?

>>22346792
Stop seething and start working.

>>22346819
Not affiliated with &amp.
Why don't you start working on your own, princess?

>>22342125
Card is trans now

I’ve been working on a story for the past 4 years and I’ve gotten a bit autistic about it. It’s very ambitious in scope with several different characters, plotlines and thematic elements. I envision it as a large story that depicts 21st century life for young people growing up and I want it to be just as representative of our era as novels like War and Peace or Great Expectations are representative of their respective eras.

But the problem is that I don’t want to be blunt with all the ideas and conflicts. I care more about showing instead of telling. There’s very little plot and there’s no real protagonist, rather I have a network of interconnected characters and motifs. Because of this I focus more on images, episodes and symbols. For me this works better with cinema than it does a novel. So far I’ve written this story as a screenplay instead of a novel but I feel kind of self-loathing with how much effort I put into it since it’s virtually impossible to become a filmmaker. Maybe one day I’ll write it as a novel and hope it’s as good as I want it to but I’m poor at writing prose (plus many of the aesthetic devices I’ve outlined are specifically made for film). Yes this is all pretentious as fuck but literature and art are very bad these days and we need ambition in order to make stuff that’s worthy.

>>22347780
Did you mean to post this to >>>/lit/wg/?

>>22314621
Brenda sellers was wrong

>>22349124
/thread

>>22349124
Nah she was spittin fax

>>22349124
>>22349126
>>22349654
All going to Russell!

>>22329141
>six days later
>still no best of

KEK

>>22350252
and you're still just whining about it, instead of making your own
many such cases

>>22347236
>now

>>22347236
always_has_been.buttdrippyhomosexual

>>22314621
You’re having a manic episode.
>weeee we’re about to go on a great adventure!! Something BIG is on the horizon!
What a nightmare

>>22352304
Card is a tranny who is also dating a tranny

>>22353636
Trannyception

>>22329141
>one week later
>still no best of

Sounds about right.

>>22355498
If it sounds right, then why don't you seem happy?

>>22350117
Who is Russell?

>>22356369
only Brenda knows for certain

>>22355877

>>22356430
He’s prolly one of her skitzo hallucinations.

>>22357141
kek
all signs point to yes

>>22354868
Her name is Johanna Davina Card now. Show some respect.

ARI PLEASE STOP BEING A KEK I LOVE YOU BUT THEYVE BEEN WAITING SO LONG. I MEAN FUXK MAN PLEASE

>>22360035
Give it a rest. The guy is a fucking joke. He’s not gonna do shit.

>>22356369
Jack Russell.

>>22361287
the terrier?

>>22362385
No the man

>>22323958
A series of threads made in like 2020 or early 2021 (I forget) in which anons made up fake literature. It's somewhat more difficult to make fake fiction compelling so it was mostly people making up philosopers and literary critics. I was pretty fun but there doesn't really seem to be any large desire to bring it back and it did get a little stale nearing the end there. If you want you can read some of the &amp articles from the period and see some /hyperlit/ related material.

>>22363313
/hyperlit/ was BASED. Good times.

>>22359285
Source?

>>22364963
An AI-generated picture of him as a her, obviously. Can't get more credible than that!

>>22365956
Nah the pic is from Card’s OnlyFans

>>22366500
You actually subscribe? LOL faggot

>>22366749
Yeah Card’s bussy is bussin

>>22367798
saying it ironically is still makes you a faggot

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWge4lR3ds8

>my youtube thing is going well, and i've got a long term plan

how are the other /lit/ regulars going? labuschange, woolston, eggplant guy, et al.
y'all doing good?

anyway, everyone, I have become convinced that we are all going to make it

>>22367811
Kys they/them faggot grifter

>>22367811
maybe you will
i sell a copy of a book maybe every 6 months

>>22363948
It was, I posted in those threads pretty regularly and I thinkbit was quite fun. Not much interest in reviving it unfortunately.

>>22363302
So, the English parson who served as vicar of Swimbridge from 1832 to 1872?

Culture's dead. Nothing "new" is going to emerge, it's all a recurring loop. Until this civilization finally dies, at least.

>>22370906
Quitter.

>>22370906
Based Nihilist

>>22371647
Nihilists go extinct.

>>22372171
That’s the goal.

>>22372222
Then why not kys now, nihilist?
What are you waiting for?

>>22372787
i think he took your advice
hope so

>>22314621
how tf this dead thread been up for so long

>>22374309
Unreal Press trannies bump it every time it reaches page 10.

>>22374309
Are you jealous that there's organic interest in this subject?

>>22373368
>>22373518
Here are Gardner's latest pathetic attempts to stroke himself in public.
The jannies just deleted them.
Such a fine day today.

>>22374519
He's been steadily losing to Card ever since they both switched over to YouTube

>>22374639
redpill me on card

>>22314621
>It feels like there's a feeling
Filtered

>>22375163
He's a retard who shills his youtube channel on /lit/, constantly claiming he's "made it" as a youtuber despite having bought his 4k subscribers from a content farm. I don't know whether he's constantly lying about being successful despite that these lies don't work, or if he's deluded and genuinely thinks his "youtube thing is going well".

>>22370906
That doesn't even make sense. When did this loop start? Unix is only ~54 years old, tcp/ip is only 43 years old. The web is only 34 years old. So is the what 10 years long? 15?

>>22367811
>how are the other /lit/ regulars going?
Not that well, but better than last year.
>anyway, everyone, I have become convinced that we are all going to make it
I believe this too.

>>22376223
I don't recall ever seeing Card shill his YouTube channel.
Who would notice, what with the incessant babbling of the groundskeeper.
Also, unless Card generated those graphs, where did they come from? I call bullshit.

>>22378075
The groundskeeper is stroking himself in public again.
Feel free to express how much you appreciate his advertising/begging.

>>22377692
>where did they come from? I call bullshit.
Yeah it sounds like BS to me too.
Stuff like
>purchased a content farm channel that was posting Elsa+Spiderman/stolen Tiktok content
How would you know? No-one would look at that channel before Card owned it That's way too specific

>>22378401
Okay Card. Keep doing damage control.

I’m assuming pic related is Jason Bryan’s new website?

>>22329141
>two weeks later
>this thread is somehow still up
>still no best of

>>22377692
Shut the fuck up, Card. Why are you making youtube videos with your face now? You're ugly as shit.
For your information, the graphs come from https://socialblade.com/youtube/channel/UCesQjbJwtICijFPNF1aWffg
>I don't recall ever seeing Card shill his YouTube channel.
>>/lit/thread/22371684
>>/lit/thread/22363927
>>/lit/thread/22289493
>>/lit/thread/22275333
et al.
Please just kill yourself already.

Gardner's fraudulent DMCAs have gotten him banned from purchasing ads on 4chan.

>>22380604
Source?

>>22380604
Now if only his fraudulent DMCAs could get him banned from Amazon. That'd be sweet.

>>22380345
No one cares about your stalking. Get a life.

>>22377692
>>22378401
>socialblade is fake news designed to hurt me
This is a new level of cope.

>>22382232
Fuck off Card

>>22380345
Lol what a pathetic faggot

Ironically Rosemary and Thyme. Parsley was a hanger on

also: nigger jew

>>22382232
KEK, cope harder

>>22382456
TIL about socialblade.
You're still a stalker. Get a life.

>>22382456
TIL about socialblade.
You're still a stalker. Get a life.

>>22382456
TIL about socialblade.
You're still a stalker. Get a life.

>>22385930
>-360 views in the last 30 days
wha

>>22386136
He probably deleted a video, or had one flagged by YouTube and taken down.

>>22386362
&amp mogs gardner

>>22387436
and &amp does it without his daddy paying third worlders on fiverr for views/likes/subscribes!

>>22386362
Common &amp W

>>22385930
>You mean someone noticed my constant shilling?
>S-s-s-sssstalker!
Why are you so ugly?

>>22388442
He looks coked out

>>22387436
>>22388220
But Gardner has you beat in every metric?

>>22388931
except the one both of those posts are replying to? are you really this stupid?

>>22389038
>look guys! We beat a guy in monthly views
>who cares if he hasn't uploaded a video in 50 days. We beat him!
I thought Card was the one coping here? Were you jealous of the attention he was getting?

>>22389336
Seethe all you want, you explicitly stated “every metric” in blatant ignorance of the metric already posted in which Gardner was beaten. You’re a fucking idiot.

>>22389402
100 subs vs 900.
3k views vs 55k views.
Cope. Seethe. Dilate.

>>22389489
D vs C+
kys, meds, touch grass

>>22389499
>social blade rank
That's so cute. I bet you believe the estimated earnings too.

>>22389515
See >>22389402

4chan is not directly responsible and even if it were, those days are dead. an author who is ahead of the trend wont get published because it wont be recognised as viable. you would have to have previous success before trying something new. the fact that there's no strong stylistic vision is actually the good part. getting sucked into a genre or concept hivemind is stagnation and if you train your writing on some wannabe new trend and it doesn't get picked up, you wasted your time.

any writer doing their own thing, even if shitty, is far better than some pseud wannabe trendsetter only creating something specific with the hope it will catch on, not because they like it.

knowing whats popular is only relevant if you're looking to trad publish. self published work is niche can be anything as long as one builds an audience. and trad publishers will not accept off trend work unless you have a track record.

>>22389554
This isnt new. Proust had to use hos own money to publish In Search of Lost Time because editors refused the book.

Maybe the next revolutionnary writer is currently writing fury fanfiction online because it pays the bills

>>22386362
that BAS unboxing vid is a workhorse
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPGQrzYBxtM

>>22389817
I think I can decode the author’s letter to the editor. Stay tuned.

>>22389941
from the video? you're not gonna gleam much