/lit/ - Literature

Why does the catholic church ignore the church fathers?

>>22081178

But if Jesus was born for the sole purpose of serving as a sacrifice for our sins, then God knew what would happen. So the Jews were merely the vehicle to carry it out, as ordained by God. Same as when God hardened the Pharoahs heart. So how can you blame them when God decided to use them for the most important act he ever carried out? If the Jews didn't kill Him then someone else would as it had to occur, as was supposedly prophecied. Contradiction upon contradiction.

>>22081222
>still doesn't understand free will

more like fartin Heidegger

>>22081266
Free will really isnt compatible with Christianity

>>22081175
gonna work on my parent's land clearing out some overgrown forsythia that I'm apparently highly allergic too, so I'm happy to be rid of it.

I have a lot of thoughts and emotions going on in my mind right now. I keep jumping from memory to memory, recalling how I felt at the time and then reflecting on how I feel about it now. The general view I have of my life as whole is that it's been a big mess. There's never been a time in my life where I've had stability. And now here I am, well into adulthood, totally unfounded as a person because of it. Only now do I have a sense of direction and maturity enough to handle what I need to do. But even then I still feel stunted and weak because I know my situation is precarious. If say my dad died tomorrow, I'd be fucked because I still depend on him for a lot. I could never achieve the basics in life because my life has always been like a hurricane. And now I'm just totally overcome with frustration woth who I am and where I am. At 24 I'm only just barely achieving the things that everyone else had down at 18.

There's nothing I can do, nothing I want to do. I don't want a job, I don't want a career, I don't want to play this ridiculous game of life anymore. I'm middle aged now and can't believe how insane it all is. Childhood was something else. I often think the problem is that the 80s and 90s were so good that's why it's so hard now. Yet everyone I know gladly got involved I'm clown world so maybe it's me, maybe I've always been the problem. I just don't know what to do. Wageslavery when I don't want to consume at all, my needs are so small yet still have to be a slave just to keep a roof over my head. AI will ruin everything even more x100. I can't even be bothered thinking about women and sex anymore, a total lost cause. Just want to pack a bag and leave forever. Just want to experience freedom. I'd join a monastery if only I had the religious fervour for it. Instead I'm a middle aged man hoping some anonymous autistic zoomer on 4chan half my age with half my life experience will help me solve my lifelong existential torpor. Rejoice o young man in thy youth.

>>22081324
I'm so glad I have an innate tendency towards religious thinking because the only way I can handle the tedium and meaninglessness of life is by belief in God and support from my religious friends

How do I make a webm?

back from exile

Has the world actually gone insane or is that all just online

My dad gives pretty bad advice. He means well, which is why it took me so long to realise that pretty much all his advice is wrong. I don't blame him though, he grew up in a different time and is trying his best to understand the current state of things. He at least doesnt bury his head in the sand like some parents. Ah well, I'll probably end up exactly like him one day.

>>22081355
For a long time I've been an advocate for all the madness mostly being online, but it increasingly encroaches on the workplace, dating, friendships etc. They're putting a lot of pressure on my team at work to attend these anticolonial struggle sessions where you get lectured at to the point of tears about your racism. I'm not exaggerating, the people on my team who have been to them have come out of it basically shell shocked. My manager keeps pressing me to go and I worry that they'll grow more and more suspicious of me the longer I hold out.

>>22081355
>>22081365
Midwits who insisted it's all online deserve it and much worse. When people were trying to prevent it you were calling them schizos. Now it's too late so get fucked. You're the feminists who complain about trannies. No one has sympathy since you brought it on yourselves.

reading Maria baszkircew journal
>she has a black servant boy
>she admits she thinks of him as a dog/doll
>his name is Chocolat
>he's now crying because he has to share a hotel room with a Jew

>>22081365
there was actually a case when a woman who worked as a secretary or some low level job was forced to go to one of those dei hazings, and she sued for creating a hostile work environment. she's like "i make 35k a year. i will not say i am privileged." idk what happened to the case, probably settled out of court with a non-disclosure agreement cuz i never heard about it again. it made it to the front page of the nyt at one point.

My last and current gf were skinny with big bobs...
No idea how i managed this. Now im scared that if i ever break up (god forbid) i cant find this type of girl anymore.

the left has gone insane

>teenage years
>goals and aspirations revolve around getting into lucrative and/or highly selective career fields, accomplishing Great Things, getting selected for special operations forces in the military, etc
>now
>urge to have a family gets stronger every day
>couldn't care less about what I do for a career as long as it sustains me
help

>>22081370
I will find your house and kill you

>>22081571
I will help you and rape his corpse

>>22081615
>>22081571
woah!, easy fellas

>>22081365
Just tell them your not a colonist or a racist and don't go. Find a lawyer and tell them what is going on they might be able to find a loophole for you and if you can also set up a plan of action if you are fired so you know what your rights are and what you can do about it.

Nigger semen

>>22081566
Shut up chudlet

I can’t shake this feeling that I’ve failed life. It’s not that I’ve failed some thing in my life, but that I’ve failed life itself in some grand sense. It’s like I was aiming at something without knowing it, but I made some miscalculations, missed the shot, and that was the only arrow in the quiver.

The end has no end

>>22081797
That's the devil seeding hopelessness in your soul. You have to stand up to it and realise it's not over while you're still alive.

>>22081673

Nigger semen Part II: The Eblaculation

>>22081850
I don’t think I agree with that though. It does seem that when one path is taken in life others close off. The hard truth is that you make your choice early in life, maybe so early that you don’t even realize your choice.

Do you think at thirty it’s too late to pursue a professorship as a career? I have a bachelor’s degree and some work experience but it’s not in my subject of interest.

>>22081776
you know that telling him to shut up just widens the divide between the two parties right? Don't be so easily fooled by the politicians and ruling class who say vastly different things yet they all end up voting in the same way. I'm not saying that there isn't a distinction but don't allow it to be a wedge that drives you apart from people. The more distracted you are by what the other side is doing the more easily your own party and partisans from both parties can do sneak things without notice.

>>22081909
Become Dr. Roach
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9bXbVZDDTY

>>22081324
What would make you happy?

I get violently angry when I see or think about women I have a crush on with other men. Even though I have less than 0 percent chance with any of them, and even if I didn't I wouldn't have the courage to think about asking them out, it still fills me with bloodlust. I have to actively not think about it and scrub the knowledge from my brain because it will prevent me from going about my life as it fills me with overwhelming self-loathing
Worse is that I have spent hundreds of dollars on erotica commissions in which a fictionalized version of myself has sex and relationships with them as a method of coping.

>>22081932

is resilience a synonym of fortitude?

>>22081962
There are these websites called dictionaries that explain each of those words and more.
Courage and flexibility are rather different concepts

>>22081967
that's what i thought, but google thinks otherwise

I had been conditioned to seek success from a very young age. To distinguish myself. I was not particularly bright, or exceedingly driven. At least I cannot in good faith ascribe either quality to mine own self isolated from external influence. I had concluded that my worth was contingent on how far I excelled as I was often disciplined (severely) when I gave in to my actual malignant vices and innate negligence.
The reality of the situation is that I am a lazy cunt with middling intelligence who could, theoretically really, gain proficiency in almost anything. The one component that seems to carry a larger weight in this equation of my being is organization.
I don't understand really. Why I can't take to these things that seem arbitrary to the typical person. I mean, without direction, ambition and drive are mere manifestations of a spurned ego. And that's what I have. I'm so insecure, and lost, and my sense of self is nonexistant. I could not tell you what my hobbies are, where my interests lie, what I would want from my future. I could express in vague, abstract terms, my visceral need to be "successful". But since I can't assign a picture to that success, then I truly don't have something concrete to work towards.
I tried looking within. They always tell you, do what makes the child you happy? But I have no clue what I want. There truly is nothing within. Some people are stuck from wanting too many things. Me? I want nothing.

>>22081355
both, people are using and basing their perceptions on the internet more and more each day and hence its twisting the way everyone behaves and how they see the world
as people act crazier and crazier in the real world, the online world also gets worse, making the real world worse as a consequence
We have been living in this cycle for years now

>>22081924

I don't even know anymore, I honestly can't think of anything. I'm not depressed, I know that much. This is 20+ years in the making. Some people just ain't gonna make it.

>>22082016

We need a fucking war or economic meltdown. Real hard times to give us some meaning and destory our messed up spoilt child egos.

The __ year old ____er
>goes nowhere
>does nothing
>has no hobbies
>does not go out
>does not seek relationships
>does not have any interests
>has no opinions
>preferred activity: spending time doing nothing alone in his room with the lights off
>career aspirations: any position that enables him to do the above indefinitely
>favorite drink: tap water

Why Female Led Societies Always End In Prostitution:

In a society replete with healthy patriarchal networks and a strong masculine influence, you see little prostitution, for no man could bear the shame of his daughter becoming one, and almost every man provides so she need not resort to it.

A masculine society is a conservative society, and in conservative societies it is not only prostitution that is less common, but promiscuity in general, for prostitution is a step beyond promiscuity, and you cannot have rampant culturally normalised prostitution without first normalising promiscuity.

In patriarchal, conservatively led masculine societies, only immigrants that'd been trafficked by criminals, widows without family support and orphans would ever seriously consider turning to prostitution in any form. It would be a shameful thing done only by the desperate as a means of survival, and no self-respecting woman with any kind of family support or hopes of ever becoming a mother or wife would engage in it.

Prostitution has always existed, but it was a necessary evil done by an unfortunate and unprivileged minority for the benefit and convenience of the needful. It was never considered a viable occupation to most women, although it is one of the world's oldest professions.

But in feminist societies like the west, where natural law has been overturned and the men have been deposed from their rule, many households are female led. Broken families are common, and women often grow up without fathers, or with fathers who hold no authority and command no respect. And so we have the proliferation of prostitution in all its quasi forms, with girls waiting to turn 18 to start an onlyfans account so they may extract money from the most pathetic, degenerate and horny men they can find by monetising what should only be seen by their love interest. (1/2)

>>22082300
They have no protection or provision - so they resort to their very basest instinct which is to prostitute themselves in the pursuit of both.

And unfortunately the boys too are not unscathed by this matriarchy, for many are as pathetic in their adulation as they are their willingness to pay, often not even paying for sexual convenience, but for mere images and videos and clumsily cultivated delusions that the women they are talking to are romantically interested in a loser who would pay for their affections, namely, them.

The men live a fantasy, the women sell their souls, and neither is the better for it.

And even if you were to ask the most predatory of men, say those who made their fortunes from pimping women if they would want their daughter on the pole, they would tell you they would not. They are merely hypocrites all too pleased to monetise your daughter's sexuality doing precisely what they would never want another man to do to theirs. Yes, rather hilariously, not even the most immoral men are as enabling of promiscuity and prostitution as the matriarchy is, they merely take advantage of your unprotected and neglected daughters to enrich themselves.

If your daughter is on the pole, or only onlyfans, or doing any kind of sex work be it digitally or physically - you are a failure as a father. She has brought your family great dishonour and great shame, and even the most degenerate sociopathic men know that - which is why even beyond any compassion they feel for their own daughters, they would not allow it.

And none of this would be possible without the overwhelming success of feminism - without having undermined the authority of patriarchs so extremely by destroying families so thoroughly, there would not exist a climate where prostitution and all its quasi digital forms are so normalised and pervasive.

Feminism is the victim of its own success, for by succeeding in destroying the authority of the father, they have left society's daughters to fall prey to the wolves. They saw the sheep in the pen with the shepherds standing nearby and they said "those shepherds are trapping those poor sheep, let them out!" and then did everything in their power to remove them, waging a relentless war. Now the shepherds are gone, and the pen door is flapping ajar with roaming wolves coming to fleece their prey.

And that my friends is feminism in a nutshell - it is the self-destructive instinct of the negative feminine to see everything burn, including itself - and it'll begin that process by contracting a sexually transmitted disease, if not in pursuit of pleasure, then at the very least in pursuit of profit. (2/2)

>>>/vg/430821905
Artificial Academy 2 General /aa2g/ #1280
Sleeping Edition

Welcome, this general is for the discussion of ILLUSION's Artificial Academy 2.

COPY ERROR MESSAGES WITH CTRL+C, PASTE THEM WITH CTRL+V INTO GOOGLE TRANSLATE. JUST CLICK THE WINDOW AND PRESS CTRL + C, IT WORKS.

>Downloads:
/aa2g/ Pre-Installed Game, AA2Mini: https://tsukiyo.me/AAA/AA2MiniPPX.xml
AAUnlimited updates: https://github.com/aa2g/AA2Unlimited/releases
Anon's Modded Pre-Install: https://pastebin.com/42JS3q6E

>Information:
AA2Mini Install Guide:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vS8Ap6CrmSNXRsKG9jsIMqHYuHM3Cfs5qE5nX6iIgfzLlcWnmiwzmOrp27ytEMX03lFNRR7U5UXJalA/pub
General FAQ:
https://web.archive.org/web/20200216045726/https://pastebin.com/bhrA6iGx
AAU Guide and Resources (Modules, Tans, Props, Poses, and More):
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/17qb1X0oOdMKU4OIDp8AfFdLtl5y_4jeOOQfPQ2F-PKQ/edit#gid=0

>Character Cards [Database], now with a list of every NonOC in the megas:
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1niC6g-Xd2a2yaY98NBFdAXnURi4ly2-lKty69rkQbJ0/edit#gid=2085826690
https://db.bepis.moe/aa2/

>Mods & More:
Mods for AAU/AA2Mini (ppx format, the mediafire has everything):
https://www.mediafire.com/folder/vwrmdohus4vhh/Mods
/aa2g/ Modding Reference Guide (Slot lists for Hair/Clothes/Faces, List Guides, and More):
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1gwmoVpKuSuF0PtEPLEB17eK_dexPaKU106ShZEpBLhg/edit#gid=1751233129
Booru: https://aau.booru.org

>HELP! I have a Nvidia card and my game crashes on startup!
Try the dgVoodoo option in the new win10fix settings.
Alternative: Update your AAU and see if it happens again. If so, disable win10fix, enable wined3d and software vertex processing.
>HELP! Required Windows 11 update broke things!
winkey+R -> ms-settings:developers -> Terminal=Windows Console Host

Previous Thread:
>>>/vg/429688447

>>22082307

>>22081365
I'm convinced that the internet was made as a divide and conquer tactic. Especially knowing it's origins in the US military. They coral everyone into a digital echo chamber and then pump in the most batshit propaganda to demonize others. While the masses argue over complete bullshit, those on top can sneak in more and more oversight & control. It's pretty disappointing seeing so many people take the bait.

I'm never gonna kill myself but God, often do I feel like doing it!

>>22082414
same.

>>22082414
I sometimes feel like dabbing.

My guts are making loud churning noises. Put on headphones so I don't have to hear.

If one shouldn't die because their death will bring pain to others then by converse should one die if their death would improve the life of a lot of people who'd do better off without them?
Is there a spectrum, or a threshold where it can be measured, should such a death even be grieved?
The ones close to them obviously would but should the net aspect of their death making the world a better place be taken into consideration?


Is it not righteous then for you to spare everyone from your existence by disappearing?
For in death you will finally have mattered, if your death were to bring joy you should consider it at the very least
Because in any scenario you, in the end, are a slave to the people around you and their expectations of you which bring nothing but sadness


Then why should I go on living?
Cowardice?
It's not like I'm particularly happy with this existence either
It's the depths of this despair where I find hope for tomorrow, maybe that won't be as bad
But anyone can observe these patterns and can see, I'm never going to find that happiness in life
I go on in my cowardly hope

Y

>>22082443
lol eat?

>>22082379
it's not a very well thought out take, do some reading or something.

Im unironically a wizard.

>>22082455
do you love casting spells?

>>22082446
Not stomach, but lower. The intestines.

>>22082457
I wish I could cast a love spell.

>>22082455
Nice dubs, I believe you.
Bless me please.

I wish I had more drive.
Other men seem to have loads of it and be hungry for life.
I'm just tired most of the time and so fucking insecure I have difficulty just talking with people I don't know well (and even close family sometimes, to tell you the truth).
>inb4 exercise
I used to exercise quite intensely thrice weekly and it was even worse cause I was tired from exercising.
Not sure if it can be helped, cause it almost feels physical more than mental? Can anyone relate with this - having this physical feeling of insecurity in the body?

>>22082032
How does this end?
With the Nukes Going off or Integrating Fully into AI?

>>22082455
ān wicca

>>22082604
sorry but Im 30 yo khv

i've never read shakespeare. is it worth it?

>>22082690
idk maybe

>>22082587
I wish I knew

When I was younger I was terrified of girls my age so I did everything to avoid them and was nervous as fuck whenever I was forced to interact with them. This led to many of them calling me a creep/rapist/stalker. The only time I had positive interactions with them was when they wanted to copy my homework or do group projects with me, but once they realized I wasn't smart, they bailed instantly. I'm a lot better at socializing now as I can talk to people at work without a problem but outside of that I avoid people like the plague. I'm just a small dick loser who will never succeed and will never have a relationship. I can't risk having my already crushed ego completely destroyed.

>>22082032
>>22082587
Eh, people made the same claims before about book, newspapers, radio, television, video games, and Pokémon. Nothing really that new under the sun. If you learn to read Latin you can read about people from the Early Republic to the end days of the Empire complaining about how Greek culture was making all the Roman youth soft and weird and that Greek culture disconnects you to reality because you spend all day reading and watching plays rather than doing something productive like building something or farming.

>>22082740
Fuck, iktf. How old are you now?

>>22082740
>'m just a small dick loser who will never succeed and will never have a relationship. I can't risk having my already crushed ego completely destroyed.
first two steps:
1) stop playing video games
2) stop watching porn and masturbating
your mental health will thank you
also listen to the lust part that someone wrote and used an joshua graham's voice to read off:
https://youtu.be/SmIbxq7z7p0?t=970
I recommend the whole thing, but the only part that is relevant to my comment and you is the lust part.

>>22082767
The blind leading the blind.

>>22081175
By insisting he accept their lies as
real
By insisting he was never to his
people tied
By dictating exactly what he might
feel
By permitting bawdy joy but never pride
They believed a lion could be brought to heel
That a lion could from his courage be pried
That the lion himself would learn
to kneel That a lion would not care even if his line died
That the lion himself would accept such a deal
In the end it was only to themselves they had lied.

I need to stop dating dumb girls. I’m not even saying she has to be some galaxy brained genius, but dating immature, unstable and promiscuous social media addicts whose spiritual and cultural background consist entirely of watching netflix and believing in vague new age feel good bullshit is soul draining. The worst part is that they’re so sure there’s nothing more to the world beyond their puddle depth perception of it and tend to react to anything outside of it with derision, insecurity or aggression.
At least I’ve never some pseud art hoe. That seem like a whole other kind of hell.

I wanna play baseball. It isn’t popular in my country but I found a place where I can practice it. They even have classes for inexperienced adults. Gonna have a go at it once I have some money. I hope people don’t treat me like trash for being an absolute noob.

>>22081915
Shut up, chud

>>22082826
In the land of the blind the one eyed man is king

Suicidal thoughts almost every FUCKING day for the last two years.
How do I get rid of this?
Who do I talk to?
What do I do?
Man seriously, I can't handle this anymore.

>>22082883
Learn to field and nobody will care even if you couldnt get on base to save your life.

>>22082886
kiss me

>>22082826
Iunno man, I've given up video games for 3 months and I got so bored I started doing yard work to occupy myself. I feel a lot better, I'm getting more sunlight, and I went from 210 to 190 lbs. I'm struggling with the porn part but I'm miles better off of video games than on them.

The lizard's little heart was beating so hard he thought it would erupt from his chest. I'd better look relaxed, he thought. Make this seem casual. I mustn't look as to seem as worried as I am. I'll try to go for the demeanor of that little lizard from the commercials. Because a moment's notice could turn on a dime, and in his sloppy disorientation the gigantic person whose hand now enveloped his torso would paralyze him without even thinking about it. Nobody can know the worry; the lizard did his best to seem as though he were remaining calm

>>22081331
The more I delve into what it means to be religious the more I think that Im not actually religious I’m just calling myself one.
I mean I believe in God. If belief in God is supposed to relieve me of 40% of the burden of hindsight and the dread and apprehension that come with the future. Yet im an anxious wreck.

>>22082966
lol

>>22081178
>Why does the catholic church ignore the church fathers?
1960s politics and the reforms of the second vatican council. Supersessionism was rolled back in favor of "the jews are still waiting for their messiah." Which makes sense honestly, because they will be converted someday. But the tldr for normies is its just political correctness in the name of ecumenism. That's why Catholics don't pray for the "perfidious Jews" anymore at every mass. Go read about Cyril of Alexandria and his experience with arsonist Jews. We have always been at each other's throats from the earliest records of the earliest church. Jews in the decades after the destruction of the temple in 70, and especially after the Jewish Christian movement didn't fade away, began to define themselves in opposition to those Jews who claimed that the messiah had come and he'd died for their sins. These same hebrews started very much like Christians would do in the Church Fathers: rabbis building up a mishnah and talmud, commentaries and analysis on their holy book. We're really not that different. Except we have the gospel and they don't.

I just recently finished Lady Chatterley's Lover by D. H. Lawrence, and one of the final conversations between Mellors, the lover of Lady Chatterley, and Malcolm, her father, had me cramping up with laughter.
It basically consists of the father saying "good job fucking my daugther, bet you have a nice cock too bro, I know how it is, I also fuck a lot" and them high-fiving each other.

FAZ O L CARALHO

>>22083007
Catholic cope is truly pathetic

>>22083007
>We're really not that different.
Agree, both Catholics and Jews are anti-christians

>>22083007
It's not really that. Lots of them have good ideas and heretic ideas and sometimes those are the same ideas. There is a reason why we can only saint the dead and all the dead are sinners, except Mary. A lot of the church fathers aren't even Jews. V2 does deal with a lot of the blatantly apparent antisemitism of the medieval period on, and does a lot of things officially which make traditionalists not see it as an apostate council (like making Mary a saint, but not making the other Mary not a whore)
There is a kind of syncretic Jewish Catholic culture too, partially from forced conversion, but also partially from church fathers. Traditionalists eat fish on Wednesday and Fridays, which in medieval Europe was a secret Judaism sign of false converts, while V2 members look at that and ask since when in Wednesday a fast more than once a year?
The Bible itself has a bias towards Samaritans, which is a Jewish adjacent sect who claim the real Temple is north of Palestine, and the Jews and Muslims are fighting over the wrong place. Every Samaritan Jesus meets is a good person, and it's pretty easy to make an argument that He's a recognised precursor of the Temple being returned at the final reckoning, because the people worshiping at the northern Temple recognise him.

>>22083197
>Lots of them have good ideas and heretic ideas and sometimes those are the same ideas.
>heretic ideas are good ideas
See >>22083129

doubt clouds my mind, I don't know what I want out of life, what I want to make out of it

>>22083248
>There is any human alive on earth to judge
Kek, no, all we got is best guesses and those times the pope sits in the right chair with the right costume and hopes his words get outside the cathedral. We're not here to question why He wanted hats, just to revel in His Divine Mysteries, Real Presence, and Pervasive Grace.

>>22081899
That's not a hard truth it's a lie based on nothing. You can start a family at 40 and have a wonderful life. No, life is not about fame and careers.

They deleted my thread on /his/. Where should I submit a formal complaint?

>>22083389
>That time they allowed me to appeal a ban for being in a Lolita thread on /lit/
>That time when the janny and mods, for free, let me unveil my Nabokov power level and inform them of all the references and allusions and inconsistencies of the work and Nabby's point in using them to create different horrors than appear on the page in the reader's mind in a prime example of early American postmodernism
If they banned you, I suggest considering character limits in your appeal, because it was very hard to fit the bit about the highway system in mine. Other than that, good times, happy days.

>>22083260
The reason, I see now, is my chronic and profound lack of self-knowledge.
Who am I? What do I want? What are my values? What do I care for? I don't know. I really don't know.
And with my heart and mind filled with doubts, I am distracted my false hopes and ideas and tormented by fears, fear of the future, fear of regret, fear of everything. And under this constant indecision, acting like a pendulum swinging back and forth, I lose time, I lose life.

>>22083389
Lol

>>22081175
There is no being, only becoming. Seethe.

>>22083450
In what does becoming subsist?

The fact that the sizing of shoes and clothing are not standardized triggers my autism and makes me depressed.

>>22083541
on a global scale? Why the fuck would they do that?

An endless stream of faces filled with either anger, disgust or contempt. As heads of those that once stood so close to me float above. All but one wore looks of disappointment. All but one I had failed.

>>22083544
why wouldn't they?

God I can't wait to see you! I can't wait to touch, caress and kiss you, Haze my love!

I've been feeling weird lately. My mind is more sparse but sporadic than I've remembered. I feel like I had more colorful but clear thoughts of myself and my surroundings but lately I've felt like I've been regressing somehow. I notice my mouth slightly agape and sucking in air now when I've always inhaled through the nose. I can't seem to keep up in even banal conversations. I stare into space, and sometimes I stare at trifling things, like a particular crack in the sidewalk, for too long, among other things like raindrops sliding down windows, or a small bug walking over detritus, and without a thought about it. Now I get up sometimes and flail around like a child and say things like "poopy niggers, poopy niggers, poopy niggers!" and sometimes the impulse to shake my head violently around like a possessed doll.
Could this be a frontal lobe injury? I've banged my head on a wall in the past but to no concussion as far as I could tell. I'm getting dumber. I don't do any drugs. What's happening to me?

>>22083615
weird cultural reasons and old system entrenchment, same reason why the USA and the UK won't go full metric. The system is so entrenched that changing it will just confuse people.

>>22083659
>I notice my mouth slightly agape and sucking in air now when I've always inhaled through the nose
That's how you end up looking like an incel. No joke, most of the guys complaining about "shit genetics' don't actually have shit genetics. They are confusing their morphology for their genetics when their morphology is adapting to the bad habits they don't even know they have. Again proving that lack of awareness is the most damaging thing you can do to your physical and mental health.

Message to H****a A*****o:
You're probably the most beautiful physical thing in the province,albeit in the country; if only you knew...

>>22083741
*maybe in the country

It's 3am and the college kids in my building are screaming loudly. Not just talking loudly, literally screaming like monke.

>>22083659
Are you vegan?

RISE ABOVE THE MOUNTAINS
LIGHT A FIRE IN THE SKY
FOR THE BLOOD IS RUNNING STILL
FROM THE ROOTS OF YGGDRASIL

RISE ABOVE THE MOUNTAINS
BE THE FIRE IN THE SKY
CARRY ME TO THE HILL
MY BLOOD WILL FEED YGGDRASIL

>>22081272
Why's he so gassy?

>>22081175
Pride and Respect. One without the other is tyranny, the other without the one is cowardice.

I'm so tired of being alone

>>22083869
Become productive, do things to distract yourself, here is a list of suggestions:
1) stop playing video games
2) stop masturbating and watching porn
3) start cleaning your house/room
4) start doing yardwork
5) if you aren't working out, start working out pick strength training, stretching, or cardio and gradually work to add in all three
6) go for walks
7) meditate
8) stop listening to music so much, there's tons of research that say that people who listen to music are more likely to experience negative emotions.
I hope this helps, remember to want people is human but to need them is weakness.

>>22083888
Yeah thats all fine and dandy, I already do most of whats on that list. Doesnt change the fact that I'm alone and have been for a very long time.

What transpires when mine surroundings becometh two-dimensional illumination in a somber chamber by mine own self, lacking verdant groves, meandering streams, and fellow beings?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gp1FXar2v6g

>>22083896
frame of mind shift then. You aren't always truly alone, you have yourself. Your lucky if even around 10% of what you do is actually you and not some sort of sub-conscious shadow or autopilot. Be a friend to yourself first before you can be a friend to someone else. I have the exact problem you do, I have no shortage of retards trying to contact me, mostly to get something out of me.

>>22083929
I'm not just being a cynical ass hole. All the advice you posted is sound. I discovered it all myself in my efforts. I'm not weak willed. Ive put a lot of effort into fighting this inner malaise. I just get so frustrated because no matter what I do, nothing changes and all the same regrets linger. I have hope for the future but I'm afraid that as soon as the better tomorrow comes I'll be so wasted inside that it won't matter.

Time to eat several White Castle burgers and potato chips.

>>22081178
This kind of irrational lashing out at the Jews makes me like them more.

i got a cold for the holiday weekend so all i can do is lay in bed half listening to audiobooks or skimming /lit/. this sucks ass.

>>22083945
>I just get so frustrated because no matter what I do, nothing changes and all the same regrets linger. I have hope for the future but I'm afraid that as soon as the better tomorrow comes I'll be so wasted inside that it won't matter.
>can you control the the past?
no, don't worry about it
>Can you control your inner malaise?
Despite it seeming hopeless, yes, but you must thrash against it against with all your might. You need to do research and soul searching to find your own answers.
>No matter what I do nothing changes and all the same regrets linger.
Then don't worry about it, past is past you can't change it. Worrying about it is highly unproductive and will make you miserable.
>but I'm afraid that as soon as the better tomorrow comes I'll be so wasted inside that it won't matter.
Then act now to change to try to change this but at the same time come to terms that this might be your reality and learn to love it.

I’m looking for kino with americana fashion. Anyone on /lit/ can recommend me some?

>>22083984
idk what americana fashion is but gangs of new york is on sale on itunes for $5 rn thinking about coppin it havent seen that shit in like 20 years god damn

>>22083007
just how bad was vatican II?

>>22083950
you'll like most ancient greek and roman historians then. Cicero, who is legit a pretty level headed dude goes on a random 3 chapter tangent on how much he hates the jews that has nothing to do with what he is writing about and what is even funnier is that he has more than 50% of what he is complaining about wrong. Its like complaining you hate black people because they speak japanese kind of wrong.

>>22084057
TACITAS, it was tacitas' Histories where he goes on a 3 chapter rant about the jews that is more than 50% wrong. Sorry, there is so much history there that a lot of it just gets mixed in my mind.

I want a flast chested emo girl to ram me with a strapon and call me her bitch

>>22084073
gay/10 I suggest 10 years of voluntary or involuntary dopamine detox in nature.

>>22084076
There is nothing more striahgt than a skinny emo girl

>>22084086
talkin' more about you riding the silicon train to prostate town, there buddy...

>>22084087
Prostate play isnt gay if it's a woman doing it

>>22084089
there is a reason its called a prostate and why when women lay down to have sex its described as "prostrating themselves", Anon.

>>22084093
Thats literally semantics. Man on man = gay. Woman on man = straight. Simple as.

>>22084096
yes, except its not woman on man, its woman with silicon on man so its actually silicon on man, no different than using a dildo, my dude. Deductive reasoning is a sword that bites both ways, my dude.

>>22084100
No because getting plowed by a dude is an entirely different dynamic from getting plowed by a girl. A man and woman doing butt stuff is fundamentally hetero

Visited my family last weekend and saw my Dad was reading the copy of Crime and Punishment I left at home years ago. Got a healthy chuckle when he kept referring to detective Porfiry as 'Russian Columbo'.

>>22081175
Why is watching pimple and blackhead popping so satisfying?

>>22084104
except its not man and woman doing butt stuff its a woman shoving a dildo up your ass. Regardless if the woman was there or not its still an interaction between dildo and your anus making it gay.

>>22084105
>Russian Columbo
sounds like a meme that would be made today.

>>22083984
I’m looking for fashion like twin peaks or talented mr ripley.

>>22084115
Theres nothing gay about anal penetration. Homosexuality, as the name suggests, has a necessary condition two males. A man and a woman having sex is not gay

>>22084120
>I don't see why it's such a classic. Whats-his-name kills that poor woman and realizes he's isn't such hot shit like he thought. Then Russian Columbo solves the case, but it drags on for hundreds of pages.

I honestly couldn't argue against him.

>>22083405
Do you have a copy of it? I’m curious about your autism.

>>22083405
>jannies on /lit/ have a lower IQ than the average /lit/izen
I'm not surprised

>>22081175
Sleeping inside a used 2012 Ford Focus . one dashlight is broken. Rammed it into a gas station pole. Tire blew a month ago. Then the transmission failed. Something flew off my windshield wipers the other day, so now they scrape instead of wipe. Gone is gone. Lke how everything goes---
This car and a suitcase full of books, just diversions, leftovers to reheat again and again and again. Eventually it will all have to be trashed..
He's unintentionally funny. Anon .... Anon ..No se como parece. You are an enigma to me.
Seems like a loner. Sloth.
Made a fool of yourself as usual.
Intense, Serious. Ridiculous.
. Words I don't leave behind. I wish life was a one way highway, and things could really be GONE. I'm only these words now. I'm stuck inside them no matter how far I go. My chest hurts. My expiration date past sometime ago, but it's in the freezer where it can last beyond itself.
What if when I'm 30 I end up working at a gas station? Dear lord.
Tonight all the past faces will haunt me. I tell myself they mean nothing. Maybe they do if left behind. Just trash, wrapping paper. Unwrap and toss it. So many iterations I've gone and it's the same. New set new pieces This one perky, that one whatever. I don't care about the game I toss. Onto the next which I won't play either.. It's always . I've already popped it. pieces
.. EVERYWHEREE. On the floor. I can't sleep. Trashed it all and detached again. If you want me I am gone but you don't anyway since i was never even really a part.
How has. It come to this . Called my Mom yesterday. Nothing but tired, rehearsed lines. And how old her voice sounds on the phone; old and kind of tinny sounding shrill yet so very tired. Not real.
:::::
How are the grandparents?
Well Dad's gotten really bad to the point where he can't ------So it looks like we're going to have to put him in hospice.
Oh I'm sorry to hear that, that must be rough.
So what are you watching these days?
Huh guess I'll have to check that out.
Etc etc. ETC..........
Im tired lf this. I want to go away now.but I am already away, so there's nowhere left to go away Ha.
I can hear the trepidation and disappointment in her voice. As well as fear.
She wanted more for, or rather from me. And I can't deliver.

>>22081175
I had an honest to god tranny tell me my zipper was open today

>>22084224
Did something specific trigger this spiral for you?

>>22084240
they could smell it

I really fucking miss you. I hope you’re okay. I wish you would call me. I’m so sorry.

during on my way back home on a greyhound i cuddled with the random girl beside me. was interesting

>>22081175
---- Solaria ---
429
Reply

This afternoon I dead-headed a raised bed of violas
And notwithstanding how ridiculous
It is to go that far for a look

It's rather cheap in terms of time expense compared to anything by Jeff Koons
Except for the vacuum cleaners backed by fluorescent lights,
An Idea I'd run with all the way with

To the everyday museum of play remote from work.

>>22084277
GONNA TAKE A GREYHOUND
ALL THE WAY TO GEORGIA LAWD
I AIN'T NEVER COMING BACK

>>22084033
communist infiltration in the first half of the 20th century showed its face. now the pope is an eco-activist who uses his position and signature encyclical Laudato Si to support the agenda of globalists that are trying to sell us a permanent people's revolution against "consumerism." it's not about green this or carbon that, it's simply a mechanism for gaining political control over everyone. the object is getting democracies to accept the yoke, and we're almost there.

vatican ii had noble goals, but the implementation was atrocious and marred by insider threats. the 1970s-80s were marked by indigenous syncretism in local parishes that would never have been allowed before. this shit continues to this day, see the pachamama controversy and all the liturgical nonsense that has been indulged at the highest levels. mounds of earth set up inside church, veneration of an earth moth deity, associating this false idol with the Blessed Virgin Mary.

it was bad and remains bad. our chastisement is coming.

>>22082525
Go to the doctor and get some blood work done. You might be deficient in something

Such a bummer how meaningless and boring life is.

the monotony...

>>22081175
---- Solaria ----
430
Reprise

Caricature in shape, still more in color stellar blue
The first bachelor buttons bloom

And float in light like sailor's delight in tropical atmosphere.

I was watching a horror mpvie with my dog. She barked at the jump scare and that scared me which caused me to slam my elbow in the floor. My elbow hurts now

>>22084524
How do guys like you survive? I've been in absurd situations, and come out fine.

Just hit on a girl at the bar. She had been by herself for a while but then her boyfriend showed up about 30 seconds into the conversation. Oh well, I stepped out of my comfort zone and did something I was scared to do - that's a positive thing right?

>>22084694
Yes. It is. Keep at it bro. We'll all get our boyfriend-free girl one day

>>22084654
Sounds comfy nonetheless. I'm kind of addicted to true crime documentaries, especially when recovering from a liquour binge. Something about civilization so organized and advanced that forensic analysis is even possible gives me great comfort.

>>22084707
True crime usually bores me desu. I just like jump scares, spooky supernatural, and the macarbe. Its been funny because i only just got this dog 5 months ago. She gets freaked out by horror movies. Theres just something really endearing about a dog getting nervous as soon as the suspense violins start.

>>22084742
I enjoy the stories, simple or ornate. A couple days ago I ran across an episode of 48 hours that was made about 15 years ago, and I was amazed by how much better it was than anything like it made recently, the writing, interviews, editing. I used to make jokes with a co-worker about Bill Curtis's "Rape In Connecticut", but I respect the guy.

>>22084680
I have been in absurd situations too but I see down to the foundation of life and its boring. Yes even sex and violence and power is boring. Art is boring. I'm not dazzled by the sound and fury anymore like you are.

>>22084795
Time to get into making snuff films

I need to try meth

>>22084795
I bet if I pretended to punch you that you would flinch

I feel like the only thing left for me to try is psychedelics. One last desperate attempt at resetting my brain and finding some meaning in my life. Only problem is I've no idea where to get any. I'll probably have to travel abroad for an ayahuasca retreat but they always seem sketchy and filled with new age normie nutjobs.

>>22084810
Have you heard of ketamine therapy? They dose you for a week straight and basically brute force ego death for therapeutic purposes. People seem to react well to it.

>>22084804
I'm only dead philosophically, I still have the reflexes of a fighter pilot

>>22084817
>ketamine guy again
Just let him take psychedelics

I'm a worthless loser pathetic cunt bastard

>>22084795
As an anti-social piece of poetry, that's magnificent. How old are you?

>>22084897
30

>>22084464
Is it even possible to reverse it?

>>22081175
---- Solaria ----
430
Rare Dawn

Sky so lucid that stratosphere striations
In clean lines ornament high still trees, still sleepy

In the still air, huge but nothing so faraway,
Nothing so remote, serene,

Occasionally abstract.

I have entered the zone.

It is nearly 10 years since Gamergate

The internet is slowly becoming unuseable.
The increasing amount of spamming by bots and the spam of various political and economic propagandists are going to make the internet a sea of garbage where any form of normal communication becomes impossible.
I have no idea how we could stop this.

>>22084931
I am 60, a retired cripple NEET who lives in central northern Illinois. My family is very well off, but I'm estranged from them. Geopolitically, I can't imagine a better place on the planet except for the Netherlands. As natural resources run out, the general trend will be toward cruel tyranny, and I suppose this is one of the safest places from it.

Regret is a choice you make. It’s a choice. You can choose to be bitter over the decisions you’d taken that didn’t pan out well. You can choose to grind your teeth and attribute your current misery to something you didn’t do ages ago because you lacked the fortitude, the wisdom, the foresight, etc, etc.
When will I detach from all outcomes. When will i be jaded enough to accept dispassion and indifference as viable attitudes by which i could lead a plausible existence?

>>22085060
I am old enough to remember when a similar thing happened to Myspace. Everyone left of Facebook and all that was left were bots spamming bots spamming other bots spamming bots. It was kinda bizarre to sign in to your old account in like 2012 and to see this entirely fake economy of engagement churning away by itself.

Weird to see it happen to the entire fucking net though.

>ChatGPT got banned on stackoverflow

I can't wait to buy a house in a local village, dedicate my life to making it they way I want it to be, and then kill myself in it.

>>22085068
Natural resources will never run out. Gravity and light and kinetic energy are limitless.

>>22085108
In theory. In practice there's only so much available to us clever apes. A similar principle pertains to all intelligent species, none of which ever bridges the dark between the stars.

>>22085122
Perception is reality

>>22085135
Only in the aesthetic sense. Extravagant as my sense of fantasy is, I know perfectly well that that the imperial system on which it depends is fleeting. In the end the end the human race will succumb to tyranny and oblivion by slow stages, and on a much shorter time-frame than Welles described, or hoped; There's something almost touching about how long he gives us, which is the better two thirds of about a half a million years.

>>22081175
Ancient DNA research is great, not just because it tells us about several ancient people but also because it exposes various modern ethnic identities as a gay LARP and those people as delusional mutts

>>22081178
Why do non-catholics trust fallible incel men over the literal word of god? Make me think

>>22081266
>god isn't omniscient
I've only ever found christians online subverting their own god and religion. Truly a disturbed type of people

>>22085168
Like who?

>>22081365
Not my problem

>>22085187
Anglos, Balkanites, Turks, just to name a few
Also Poles with Sarmatism

Getting tired of all of these fags talking when they don't know shit. I swear if everyone learned to shut the fuck up the world would be a better place. Look : it is free, you actually learn to structure your thoughts like the intelligent being you are supposed to be before talking, you will make fewer mistakes and people will listen to you, for once. What are you missing out on by not talking ? Nothing! And there's nothing that infuriate me more than people making jokes when someone is asking a question. Why do you even exist? Truly, goddamned retards can't stop when it comes to make a fool of themselves.

I just so sick of this cunting world. I can't stand this shit much more

Was pretty social at some point and somehow I closed myself in. Now social interactions are frustrating and feels like I'm being held back from advancing in life.
People blame me for that. I only get my social life up at work (Which is fine). Outside, I'd rather keep it low.
Some people don't understand that to grow is to change and that things cannot stay the same forever.

>>22081175
there was a movie about some rich guy, selfmade ceo or smth, he was building his career perfectly, and when he reached success he just took his guns and went on a killing spree, in broad daylight, killing all his friends, family, random folks, even when he ran out of bullets he kept pulling the trigger, until cops shot him. He hasn't gone mad, it was a rational existential decision, prolly he realized the only sense is in absurdism and destruction, because it's the only thing one can throw against forced existence he appeared into, going against every rule and every instinct dictated by the game no one chose to play. I was 12 then, can't remember the name of the movie, it reminded me the kerch student story,

>>22085187
Not him but there was a famous incident where Japan cut all funding to its genetic origin story the second it started showing they were originally Korean.

>>22084810
But why do you need meaning?

>>22083625
For a second I thought it was an apu and wojack recreation of the eye licking scene. Kind of disappointed now it's not.

>>22083615
>>22083541
While it would be convenient for them to just give the finished measurements in a common metric, sizing isn't uniform even when they share a sizing metric because of shaping.

>>22081175
god I haven't posted in one these threads forever. Told myself I would quit this website like half a year ago but I'm back here again.
I really like this OP image because it reminds me when I could catch those little green lizards when I was a kid and keep them as pets. Thanks for reminding me of good memories, OP.

>>22084810
>Only problem is I've no idea where to get any.
Get tor browser, use dark (and then you put a dot here) fail to get an onion link to one of the active markets (I've used ASAP market recently), find a reputable vendor (preferably from your own country, if possible), get some crypto (XMR), then buy some LSD (as near to zero chance of it being intercepted as possible).
Easy as pie.

Alternatively, get telegram and type in your location and something like "black market" or "drug market" or "cocaine" in the search bar and join the groups you find to get local plugs.
Also easy as pie. It has never in the history of mankind been as easy to get drugs as it is right now.

Unfortunately, psychedelics will not provide your life with meaning. They tend to amplify whatever is already there. If you are in a depressive rut, they will likely just exacerbate it.

>>22084817
I'm fairly sure it's low-doses for treatment resistant depression, not ego-death doses.

>>22084874
Who is ketamine guy? I posted when I was high as fuck on it two wwoym's back, but was I really that prominent and obnoxious, or is there another ketamine connoisseur here?
I did a bump just a few minutes ago, feels weird man

>>22085289
In this picture one can see both the United States of America and Canada.
I took this trip after I bought my 2022 Honda Civic LX.
I will never regret a single choice I make after that.

>>22085244
Chinese*
Japs are 70% chinese mainlanders and 30% Jomon
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8448447/

>>22085284
>I'm fairly sure it's low-doses for treatment resistant depression, not ego-death doses.

It's not. Thats what I assumed too, it's a natural assumption but it's wrong. They literally do pump you full of the stuff and lock you in a room for a week. You should look it up, it's pretty nuts.

>>22085287
They cut the funding because of the Korean admixture being more than just the zainichi though

>>22085292
Huh. I could have sworn I once read that it was supposed to be low and extremely tightly controlled dosages, but that was also a medico-industry shill article detailing why you can't just do it at home by snorting it, which, looking at this, and knowing that it is also prescribed and administered as a nasal spray, everyone should definitely try before forking over 5k just for the privilege of doing it at a doctor's office instead of in your bedroom for literally 1% of the price.

The loneliness I created for myself is killing me. Nobody and nothing is waiting for me anymore. I don't see a future ahead of me. I'm a nobody, a mess - gutted, stripped, burned and deadly rotten, even though I've accomplished nothing. I have to stop running, even though I haven't gotten anywhere. And rest. Rest for God's sake

Summertime

>>22085349
Just go to coomlombia and bang escorts

>>22085160
I need more time...

The sun doesn't move. You are moving under it.
It's pronounced Van Goff, not Van Go.
Grammar is just etiquette, not a regulation.
The first printed book was the Bible and that will be true until the end of time.
Heat and color are both forms of radiation.

>>22081178

The 2016 film Arrival is Satanic propaganda.
To the casual viewer, it might seem like a benign, if somewhat generic, sci-fi movie, but when we examine it more deeply, we can see a demonic agenda at work in this film.
The movie shows a race of "benevolent" "aliens" who come to earth with a message that all the nations of the world must unite under a one world government to end wars and bring peace to humanity.
Now with that in mind, let's think about the warnings of the Orthodox Christian monk Fr. Seraphim Rose. In his book Orthodoxy and the religion of the Future, which he wrote in 1975, he said that "aliens" and "UFOs" are actually demons, and he made a prediction: The "aliens" will come to earth with a message of "peace" and "benevolence", saying that the way humanity can end its terrible wars if by all the nations of the world uniting under a one world government, bringing in a new age of peace and brotherhood of all mankind. Through this deception, these so-called "aliens" will set up the system of the antichrist to rule the world.
It is interesting that modern propaganda films are promoting the exact message that Fr. Seraphim Rose warned us about decades ago!
https://youtu.be/0c-paQGSiFw

The phenomena are NOT real and it's sickening to imagine them so. What a joke. You're telling me this, these walls, this floor, those windows, that sky, the birdcalls and smells on the wind, all this nonsense is supposed to be "real?" This mockery? This ridiculous farce? The augur of the intellect penetrates this like a diamond bore through the thin paint laid over canvas. In one stroke, in an instant, in an eternal moment, I will burrow through suns, traverse the firmament, compromise the spheres above.

>>22084125
>riding a phallic shaped object like a woman isn't gay
cope

>>22085383
What is interesting about the star of david is that it was a Judaic Esoteric/Mysticism symbol before being adopted by mainline Judaism.

>>22085434
It also is used by the freemasons.

I just saw a video of a South Korean man who opened the emergency exit of a commercial aircraft during landing. Now pressure means that you cannot open these doors at cruising altitudes, but during take-off and closer to landing, it is entirely possible.
That made me scared - the realization that all it takes is one suicidal giga-faggot to fuck my shit up in a variety of situations.

>>22085386
>It is interesting that modern propaganda films are promoting the exact message that Fr. Seraphim Rose warned us about decades ago!
No it isn't. Not even on your own premises, were you correctly point out that Arrival is a generic sci-fi movie. The premise is a trope and has been for a hundred years. There is nothing interesting or predictive at all about some boring pearlclutcher reacting to the very same trope 50 years ago.
We used to have better schizos, that were at least capable of some high IQ reasoning.

>>22085444
this is why multiple airlines have air marshals from at least 1 of the two countries.

>>22085449
>We used to have better schizos, that were at least capable of some high IQ reasoning.
its not that the schizos are stupider, its that society is more intolerant of them. Back in the 80s to late 90s they were seen as novel but no one would believe them. With the moral panic of "disinformation" being invented when internet news outlets started to unseat the old traditional pushed that idea of "haha what a crazy idea, no way that could happen." to "IF WE DON'T CHALLENGE ANYONE SAYING ANYTHING "WRONG" IT WILL RESULT WITH HITLER 4.0 AND MILLIONS WILL DIE!!!!" Our society is slowly being annexed by corporatists slowly and over time and the fact that the public space and art is now so sanitized that it feels like we are all working for a giant corporation and just don't know it yet.

https://www.staygrounded.online/p/youll-never-scroll-to-the-end

everything in this culture is a humiliation/emasculation ritual

for one day, look at everything everyone is doing or being invited/encouraged to do, and ask "would a dignified man in 1880 do this? what would such a man think of this?" the entire culture is shit WOMEN and CHILDREN like, you are being lulled to sleep by the siren song of your inner child so that pedophiles can rape it

>>22085474
why do you think everything is collapsing in on itself? You cannot support a culture that is based on diversity, money, and the nebulous idea of freedom. America missed its chance to be culturally stable by never setting its official language to English and protecting its founding ethnic group, now everything is starting to go up in flames. Get a piece of land, retire early, and never look back.

>>22085370
It's all waves and radiation brother - all of it.

I'm a sailor on this dark and dreadful sea
And I need courage just the same as you need me
I’ve been fishing for a cup of sympathy
But I keep getting waves that just won't let me be

>>22085444
I never go on planes so I'm fine
Did travel with them as a kid, hated it

>>22084960
Sure, but this generation isn't going to do it. The vast majority of cardinal electors who will select the next pope are created by Francis.

>Following the 2022 consistory, 83 of the cardinal electors had been appointed by Francis, 38 by Pope Benedict XVI, and 11 by Pope John Paul II.[1] Each of Francis' consistories has increased the number of cardinal electors from less than the set limit of 120[b] to a number higher than 120, as high as 132 in 2022

83 out of 132 were hand-picked by Francis to continue his work in choosing the next pope. The damage to the church caused by modernists in the 20th century cannot be undone, we just have to continue on and probably in a much diminished church. Benedict predicted this, the number of faithful will shrink before flourishing again. The truth of Jesus Christ cannot be overcome by the utopian nightmares of mankind.

You fucking fags in here are pathetic, go to therapy or something. This isn't 'I'm holding the pillow and now I get to say my sad sack bullshit', this is a writing board and we are trying to make each other laugh here

One of the hardest parts of being a depressive antisocial loser is talking on the phone with my dad and catching up. No, I don't have anything going on. No friends or women. No big plans. No exciting news. I just go to work and go home. Same as when we talked 2 months ago. When I was in the army at least I always had something to talk about, or a deployment coming up soon. There was a narrative structure to my year. Train, deploy, come home for leave, and then start all over again. Now all the exciting stuff is in my head and it's not exactly stuff I want to share with my parents. Fuck it man. He is probably just as bored and miserable as I am but he keeps it to himself like a man. I can do that too, but I cant keep pretending to care about life. What I need to do is live my loser life unapologetically. I wish I didn't have a phone so no one could call me and force me to tell them about my lonely life.

>>22085736
I'm in a similar boat as you. I've considered just ignoring anyone who tries to talk to me about that but I don't really want to cut off my dad, even if we've had a strained relationship in the past.

>>22085723
The best writers and comics were miserable people.

>>22085750
Yeah and I have ignored my dad before, it doesn't feel good, because he doesn't give up on me. my dad is the only person on the planet who actually loves me. I just wish I was a happier person because I think it would make him happy. but I aint.

>>22085723
>this is a writing board and we are trying to make each other laugh here

I am so bored that I might actually read. I've sucked all the content out of the internet's dick

>>22085759
I can guarantee you that no good comic or writer has ever done this repulsive Dear Diary bullshit you fags are doing here

>tfw you realize the first guy to write a book never read a book himself

>>22084464
...jesus literally was a globalist hippie anon. That's the christian ideal and the one monks emulate

So I went to sea for many months. It was long and often miserable. At times I thought of this place, thought of things I wanted to say, share, and discuss. My world view developed, I had little to no contact with the digital world. New countries, people, ways of life, but no rat race, politics, cultural drama. And now I return, over a half a year later, and I'm disappointed. I'm not sure there's much I can say to the anons of grown up with for over 10 years, let alone the folks on the rest of the internet. So many uninformed posts with an army of even less informed supporters and haters rallying to their bait. So many of us fell into a trap and the real world was cut off. "Touch grass" is bait, sure, but still epitomizes the issue with our lifestyle: this world is not the real world. Its madness, confusion, and pitiable by anyone looking in. Even as I write this, I'm aware of my lucidity fading. I should never have returned. Soon I will be as I was, and grass will be but a memory, untouched yet again. I will be another miserable crawdad, just like I used to be, just like you. Cheers to us all, regardless, for I missed you assholes.

Because I'm not the guy everyone thinks I am. Because I can't be who everyone needs me to be. Because I take failure too personally. Because I don't respond to anything but failure. Because I got promoted too early. Because I was in the wrong place at the right time. Because there's no one else. Because I took the position someone better could have had. Because I didn't develop socially as a kid. Because I didn't develop socially as an adult either. Because I'm ugly. Because I'm short. Because I have no self esteem. Because I'm dirty inside. Because of my choices. Because of my personality. Because I've been a burden all along. Because I can't kill my urges. Because of what I did. Because I try to act like a human being when I'm not. Because I have an overbite. Because I'm too small. Because I never understood. Because I can't stop trying to understand. Because I'm not good enough. Because I'm not enough.

>>22085993
>tfw you realize the first book was an audiobook

What's the national epic of the USA?

>>22085428
And yet here you are, in the mud

>>22085349
Whenever people post stuff like this I have to wonder what their life is really like.

>>22086160
Moby Dick, obviously

nearly every muffler shop in oakland is installing whistler tips

There's no point in existence past childhood.

>>22085993
did the man who invented college go to college?

How the fuck do I start a small documentary film crew? I have all the equipment and years of experience, but I honestly can't find anyone who has a similar interest.
As for hiring someone, that is fine when there is work. But this is entirely about making our own films.

>>22086160
Team America: World Police

>>22086160
Marvel movies

>>22086244
Prior to the pandemic a friend worked as an editor with a small team producing documentaries about history. They had a lot of outside funding, grants and stuff like that. That might be a good place to start looking. Finding other skilled people to work on your projects just for the love of it is going to be hard to do.

>>22086270
>other skilled people to work
I'm specifically not looking for skilled people though, anyone with a pair of hands and a creative spirit is all I'm looking for. I see it kind of like starting a band.

>>22086296
Just get your friends to do it then, I guess. Or is there anybody you met during your years of experience you could call on?

>>22086307
>your friends
lmao... I guess this is my problem.
There was one friend I had who shared mostly the same world-view that I have but as soon as I brought the camera out he got scared and totally changed personalities. I don't have many friends, and the ones I do are almost completely devoid of imagination.

Soloing is my path for starters I think. This probably why I like livestreaming so much, it makes it seem like I have someone to talk to.

>>22086334
>one friend I had who shared mostly the same world-view
>as soon as I brought the camera out he got scared and totally changed personalities
I'm curious now, what do you want to make a documentary about?

>>22086366
I wouldn't say there is only one film, what I'm interested in forming is more like a band that can release "albums" within a normal interval.
Stylistically it would be the 4chan version of NPR/Vice/Louis Theroux.

>>22086066
>didn't even learn anything
You should've stayed there

>>22081175
---- Solaria ----
431
Lulz

I look at the old lady chatting like she's on a beach
In those sleek sunglasses and would like

To take her for a ride in my land yacht going 90 for old time's siake
Since this far out from the city

When the corn gets high enough interstates resemble
Tunnels of love when you go that fast.

I couldn't hate that rude loud bastard if you paid me since he maintains
Packs of feral cats with an eye fond of their witchcraft,

More or less as I do with heirloom petunias in big pots
Launched into exponetal growth

Since as character assortments go they're endlessly surprising,
Wierdly rich to see underfoot,

For instance the sleepy little tan one that none of the others dominate,
The shy black one I never see move, like a feline statue

And the big one of mountan print that any human figure seems to scare the hell out of.

There's a lot to be said for accident in video montage
And worlds first as this one is in law.

>>22086398
Just start a youtube channel bro

>>22086465
I'll give it another go.

I wish internet could go 20 years back and stay there

>>22086521
I don't, despite Twatter/Musk, etc. The music is too fantastic, encyclopedic still. Sometimes I wonder how one gets away with all that.

Feel a bit shitty picking a new career at my age.

I went out today in a busy public place for the first time in ages. Amazing how quickly my mental health problems vanished. Also can't believe how many big fat booties are out there. Are women's asses getting bigger everywhere or what? I found it somewhat depressing that I don't get to bang one

Rivers

I live in Yoknapatawpha County.

bros what happened to Jigokuraku ep 9?

>>22082525
i dunno man
i feel like maybe life cant get better
i used to be anxious and couldnt talk to people etc like you said
now im fine with people and can be pretty sociable, even with strangers
but now im so aware of how unfulfilling most social situations are that i maybe feel worse than i did when i was so self conscious
its like i used to feel lone in a crowded room and feeling fundamentally alone in the world

i think i'm gonna binge watch cowboy bebop tonight. i bought it years ago when it was on sale for $5 but never watched it cuz i don't like much anime. i still have a nasty cold but i'm awake enough to sit here and stare at my monitor.

>>22087120
It's going to make you really sad dude

>>22087120
I couldn't get into Cowboy Bebop. It looks like it would appeal to old dads and that would be the only anime they liked.

What's with all the anime trannies here lately?

>>22081175
>Be quiet type at work and just get on with what I need to do
>Wife comes in one day to visit me
>Suddenly female workers and supervisors talk to me more and include me
>Suddenly I've got a "work wife", well more like some girl there I'm somewhat closest too now designated herself as my work wife and me her work husband

Wtf is this shit and am I supposed to tell my wife about this "work wife/husband" stuff. Ive heard about it being a common joke sort of thing in workplaces.

Don’t know where I should move. I guess where my job is based. It’s a comfy little town, if not a bit lonely.

>>22087291
Move to Yoknapatawpha County

Every time someone from a different country insults me even slightly, I look at his country's demographics and immigration stats. Almost always they're getting replaced by immigrants, and this brings me significant joy.

>>22086862
Prove it

>>22086066
How did you pull this off? What were you doing? It has always been a dream of mine to take to the sea.

Dealing with unhinged women shit is too much. Especially when you know you have 0 leverage as a poor, young dude. They seem to be totally unaware of how retarded they act. At least be able to keep track of your lies and uphold your 'good girl' image before you start attempting the moral manipulation when your texts go unanswered at fucking 2am. I'm honestly so traumatized by these types of girls that even when they share 'intimate' stories or personal information I think it's all a psy-op so they can reel me in and feel the burden of their victimhood. And it's worse when I actually like them and my emotional state begins to mirror or be determined by theirs.

>>22087313
you get insulted by a lot of people from different countries? how do you manage that?

>>22087355
Also its hilarious when they complain about women and proceed to act like women. Fucking retard

Rose never caught a break. She worked for years in that hospital. Everyday the nurses would make snide comments and talk behind her back. Rose's job was to clean the patient rooms. She would pull the trash, strip soiled linens off the bed, wipe everything down, scrub the bathroom, make the bed, and finally mop the floor. Every hour or so Rose would walk over to the designated smoking area.
The smoking and cleaning chemicals had dried out her skin. Some days she had to wear special gloves to make sure her skin wouldn't flake off. Her hair was disheveled. It was as stringy and frazzled as her sweeping broom.

>>22087364
By insulting their countries

>>22087355
How’s your emotional state right now?

It's slow but I know you feel it.
Constant dull pain.
Increased intake of acetaminophen.
It is called change.

I really wish I had went to graduate school when I was younger. Then I could’ve just been done with all this school shit. Going to school in my thirties feels like such a fail.

I had a realization and now I'm closer to self-awareness.
I am happy, I feel lighter and I feel freer, I have freed myself from lies, like a slave freed from the burdens he bore.

I’m sorry I don’t know what’s wrong with me my parents are making me stay with them for now and won’t let me go back because they think I’m going to hurt myself and I’m trying to get better but nothing is really helping I’m so sorry I should never have lied for so long and made you paranoid and made you feel like you couldn’t trust me I’m so sorry it was all so wrong of me please I just wish we could talk and if you call me I’ll tell you the truth about absolutely everything and explain all of it I promise if you just talk to me I’ll tell you everything and do whatever you want and I’ll never lie to you or deceive you ever again I’m so sorry I hate lying and I never wanted it to be like this it was never malicious I promise I did it because I sincerely love you and I missed you so much that I couldn’t stand it and I thought that the end might justify the means, like if I could get through to you I would be able to show you so much affection and try to do everything to make you happy and then I could confess everything and always be honest with you from then on and I would love you so much that it would make up for all of the previous deception but I know it doesn’t work like that and it was so wrong of me to lie and there were some moments where I said unkind things and lashed out because I felt hurt and frustrated and scared and powerless and felt like I had to express the pain that I was feeling but I’m so sorry for anything mean that I’ve said or personal details I brought up I didn’t really mean those things at all and I could never have a bad opinion of you I really care about you and I’m sorry I never wanted to harass you or fuck things up for you I honestly love you so much and I’m not trying to be manipulative I’ve been getting so upset and scared lately that I feel like I reach a point of distress where I just lose control of my emotions and can’t think rationally or exercise good judgement and feel compelled to do and say whatever I can in a desperate attempt to make it stop hurting and that’s led me to say and do some really fucked up things and I don’t know why because I was never like that before any of this happened but that’s not an excuse for what I’ve done I’m honestly so sorry please

>>22082438
Same. I once impulse-dabbed in public and then I felt like killing myself.

>>22087496
>>22087496
>>22087496
>>22087496
>>22087496

>>22083691
this is retarded

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QpLxcYYfq9s

>>22087249
>Wtf is this shit and am I supposed to tell my wife about this "work wife/husband" stuff.
You absolutely should and tell your coworker to never call you that again. Don't let women fuck your life because they absolutely will if you let them. Talking out of experience. If you're not decisive enough you're going to lose your wife's trust or your wife entirely. No matter what everyone says it is never, ever a joke. One day you will find yourself alone with your work wife or whatever your succubus coworker calls herself and she'll talk to you and then she'll fill your head with double meanings and you're going to play along and do or say some shit you shouldn't have said but still did because it started innocently. Never ever let anyone decide for you. Latch onto your wife. She is all you have, all you will ever have aside from friends and family and trust me when I say even the smallest little thing can lead to your downfall. Women at work are devil spawns. Never trust anyone. Assume everything you say will end up in someone else's ears.

>>22087476
>That single comma
Kino

>>22087675
I know how to write in complete and correctly-punctuated sentences. I just can’t get calm right now, and sometimes when I feel really frantic I disregard punctuation.

>>22086066
I feel you, i worked at sea form months on and off and going to new countries, different people etc. I found all of it the exact same, from what people want in both the short and the long term it was all roughly the same for us other than the current economic climate/situations either from the crew or the places I visited.
And you know what, it wasn't some deep "we are all the same bullshit, lets be friends" it just killed my desire for seeing new places. I no longer want to travel, go abroad see foreign culture. The world is so closed off ironically because it is so open i feel like. It always felt like the same shit just different weather, it just felt far more homogenised than it should be.
Doing that and seeing the world both semi-touristically and working killed it for me, same women selling sex, same men working away. Going away to sea was the biggest mistake and best decision i ever made. It got me a great job but where is the wanderlust.

To this day i have no idea why some people - most predominantly woman - make travelling their lifestyle. Do they just go to places do some sight-seeing get drunk, fuck the local guys and state how much more cultured they are after that? I did that just in a different way and it felt like nothing at all.

>>22081175
What books should I read to be part of the bourgeoisie. I want to go to dinners and recite random historical facts and poems and shit

>>22081175
I've yet to break up with my girlfriend. Why am I such a coward?

>>22088736
Cause you're a scared little pussycat, too afraid to dish out what needs to be for the fear of what might come back at you.

>>22088778
This desu. I'm also too comfortable. Having a comfy little home with a comfy little relationship that will ultimately leave me old and frail and shallow as a dry lime. That's my destiny. An apt punishment for cowardice. Slowly fading away.

>>22085175
>incel means you hate jews not that you can't get laid

>>22081287
you wish

>>22081175
still no /rhet/ general today

spent time with my parents this past weekend celebrating Memorial Day, burgers, hot dogs, linguine salad, watermelon. swam in the pool, water was a tad cold. talking to a new girl lately, hoping things will work out.

It wasn't long 'til the maiden lasses found themselves submerged within the murky depths of the swamp, their eyes fixated on the promise of the lubricious libations that lay ahead. Forsooth, a cackling crone had divulged to them the secrets of a certain breed of elusive leech whose venom contained the power to rouse the sensual spirits of females who bore its marks upon them. And thus, driven by their own wanton desires and the frenetic thrumming within their loins, the sisterhood did set off towards the heart of the fetid bog, intent upon harnessing the mysterious potency of these amorphous beasts.


Amidst the verdant vegetation and the oppressively humid air, the search proved arduous, yet they pressed on, buoyed by the prospect of attaining some measure of carnal liberation. At length, they discovered a brood of massive, jet-black leeches, writhing within the shallows. Eager hands reached forth to capture the suckers, each girl mindful of preserving her prize by means of spiced cloves and soft cloth.

As they made the journey back to civilization, there arose amongst them a strange eagerness, a palpable hunger that belied their innocent faces. When they arrived at their sanctuary, the maidens cleansed the wriggling behemoths and nursed them tenderly, whispering words of encouragement and promises of gratification. Soon, all was in readiness, for each girl had affixed a tampon within her person, and the hour drew nigh when the momentous deed should transpire.

One by one, the sirens inserted the leeches into their feminine folds, their hearts fluttering with apprehension. Their virgin flesh convulsed with a sudden burst of pain, as though pierced by the barbed tongue of Cupid himself. Yet, this agony soon transmuted into rapturous bliss beyond compare. Cascading waves of orgasm buffeted the women's frames, leaving them quivering and spent. They became lost in an ocean of ecstasy, their very cores suffused with a celestial warmth.
And then, as swiftly as it began, it ended, and they drifted back to earth, clutching at their aching bosoms like shipwrecked sailors grasping at life preservers.

Thus, the circle closed, the sisters emerged from their private chambers, bearing witness to the changes wrought by the wondrous union between maiden and parasite. Each maiden marveled at the visceral transformations in progress throughout their respective bodies - a telltale signifier of the imminent blossoming that awaited them. Their anticipatory whispers stirred the air with hints of forbidden knowledge and a secret only shared among kindred souls.

Months passed, and as autumn approached, the maidens' bellies swelled with mystery, signaling the arrival of newborn progeny spawned through the arcane coupling, destined to perpetuate the cycle of salacious fulfillment for generations henceforth.

Continued...

Yet the secrecy of such hallowed bonds exacted a heavy toll on even those who cherished them, binding them eternal in a delicate balance wherein shame struggled valiantly against desire. In isolation, each maiden confided in the otherworldly wisdom of ancient tomes and dusty scrolls, seeking solace amidst esoteric knowledge preserved by those who preceded them along this path.

And so, the sisterhood persevered, bound not only by love, but also by the hidden truths they guarded, lest the world beyond should comprehend the unparalleled joys bestowed upon them by the mysteries of the leech. Herein lies a tale of erotic exploration, where the boundaries separating taboo and acceptance tremble under the weight of innate human yearnings, urging us to embrace our wildest impulses without fear or judgments borne of societal constraint.