/lit/ - Literature

First for read or die, retard.
First for kill animewriters.

editorchad still looking for manuscripts to punch up

>>22043517
I'm inherently suspicious of your low prices

any litrpg chads making it big on royalroad/patreon or just me?

>>22043553
my rent is only $100 a week and i don't need to spend money on entertainment because I own thousands of books

>>22043561
will you edit my futanari erotica?

>>22043517
i don't have a manuscript just a plot outline of a few paragraphs. is there a point to an editor at this stage

>>22043565
yes

>>22043567
no, you should have a mostly complete manuscript first

>finally cleared my writing block
>write a few sentences
>go masturbate
>no longer want to write
it's jover

>>22043590
Take inspiration from your life. Write in great detail about your masturbation session.

>>22043517
If you're willing to do grunt work for money why not just write a pandering LitRPG and collect Patreon Bux? Even really, really shitty ones can earn a few hundred a month

I am so infuriatingly fixated on using the same word too many times. I spend hours on thesaurus.com trying to find synonyms for every other word I type, and I constantly ctrl+f everything I think I've already used. On one hand, it's been helping expand my vocabulary and variation, but on the other, writing takes ten times longer than it should. Because of this obsession, I notice it in the writing of others. Do you?

>>22043617
i like to help people. i consider it sort of like a charity. selling erotica on amazon doesn't help anyone

>>22043654
Same problem. It's the most common way I get stuck. Using synonyms doesn't necessarily work either. On some websites there are writers who went to journo school and got taught not to repeat words, so they go to absurd lengths to come up with synonyms, and it's very noticeable.

>>22043606
Pausing my YouTube video, a new Project Zomboid series from Private Lime, I bend to my erection's commands. I take another swig of my £6 wine and open my top drawer and pull out a condom. The next piece of the puzzle lay in the bottom drawer: Hidden from prying eyes, hidden from the weekly cleaner, hidden from myself—my great shame. I pull her out, her size and dimensions, 70cm if the amazon listing was accurate, required pressure and squeezing to wrench from the drawer. In the drawer there also lay two other stuffed dolls, smaller and thus inferior to my purposes, as well as Elizabeth's ballerina dress, which was thankfully not part of her skin and thus easily removeable. Getting the condom out I remember I'm going to the STD clinic again tomorrow (returning balanitis from that misadventure with a whore) and wonder if using less lube in the condom could cause irritation make my symptoms more visible so I get more apt treatment. But I don't sacrifice pleasure for health. I roll the condom on my pecker and begin fingering the hole in my dolly's crotch I made with scissors and repeated "sex". I throw her onto the bed, feeling slightly guilty of being so rough with my "lover" (even apologising in my head), and browse /gif/, then spankbank, and finally rule34.video for HMVs—the only thing I seem to enjoy during my sessions. I find a few good ones absent of black penises, male vocals, or low resolutions, and mount my bed, bucknaked (I had showered earlier). I slipped my cock into the cotton vagina and begin humping from a top position. Fatiguing but I refused to bottom for the second time in a row and got up with Elizabeth fixed to my member and rested her on the head of my schooldesk desk chair which was the perfect height for this position. Each thurst I tightened my grip around her waist which tightened her grip around my bellend. Her blonde wool hair swung in a circle and I would glance from her blue eyes to the images of overwatch characters doing the business until my legs felt weak and I flooded the condom with shame. Continuing to thrust until my sensitivity called for abstinence, I pried her off and tossed her on the bed: I took some pictures of her and felt like, her being a children's doll with such a childlike body, having such pictures displaying her improvised stuffing pussy on my phone was something more risqué than anything else on there. I finger the hole one more time to feel for warmth and stuffed back in the drawer ready for next time.

>>22043679
>it's very noticeable
And then I get stuck worrying over this too. A teacher once caught this in a paper I wrote when I used the word 'plebeians' instead of 'people'. I hate to have a prose style that sounds too up its own ass, but I don't want to use 'said' 50+ times in 500 words

>>22043692
>I don't want to use 'said' 50+ times in 500 words
The issue with most of you guys is that you are writing to write and not to read. 500 words is 2 minutes of reading and common words like "said" are glanced over very quickly. Readers will not notice repetition of said but they will notice extraneous usage of dialogue tags where they are not needed. Focus on drafting then edit later

>>22043707
I agree with the sentiment but 50 saids in 500 words is horrendous and absolutely would grate on readers. Said is invisible but only to a point

>>22043707
I will revel in my clusterfuck of obscure verbs combined with even worse adverbs until I die

>>22043654
I use keywords the way I've seen other authors do it. There's a short story by Faulkner I've seen which the narrator will repeat the phrase "Oil wells and Yale", sometimes flipping it, several times in the same paragraph. And it gave off the impression the phrase was heard a lot in conversations because people bragged about it way way too much. Therefore Faulkner just unloaded the phrase to make it sound obnoxious rather than a mere fact.
There are other stories where you can repeat the word just to remind people of a scene, but you should be careful how often you do that. I forget some of the other reasons you would want to repeat things a lot. I try not to.

>>22043692
"said" is a practically invisible tag word when reading a book. People that get annoyed by it have skull issues. Seriously, don't worry about it.

>>22043688
What the fuck did I just read

>>22043732
I do notice ''said'', but maybe that's only in audiobooks as those don't let you glance over the word.

>>22043688
First time I've read erotica that makes me want to stop masturbating. Jokes aside, not bad for a spur-of-the-moment prompt; though some of your syntax is long and awkward. Or else I'm too smooth-brained for it, which is also a definite possibility

>>22043752
well, I am drunk on white wine and did just write a joke post (haha) about me fucking a stuffed doll. I'm sad you think I'm bad at writing though

got told nobody wants to read my trashy genre fiction because nothing is happening in the first chapter. im really not sure what that means at all. there is plenty happening

>>22043754
You value my half-assed critique too much for someone whose writing you haven't seen. At least you've written more words than me today

>>22043762
post the first two paragraphs

>>22043762
that's horrible advice unless nothing is really happening on a thematic scale

>>22043688
simply based

Apparently my writing reads like AI. I really thought I would make it and break through the AI wall. Its over for me

>>22043791
Regularly throw in a racial slur and it can't be mistaken for an AI

>>22043762
>get told nothing is happening
>n-no you don't understand I'm just letting the reader know about the world's lore so they can get into the story later
if a reader takes the time to give you critique, the last thing you should do is reflexively brush it off. post it so we can see

>>22043762
As someone who is an expert at writing the most boring drivel imaginable, I can guarantee that your context/world building isn't as interesting to others as it is to you. I've wasted so much effort on writing things that are just flat-out tedious. I can't give you specific advice without seeing an example, but I've heard some saying that you should "show" rather than "tell" to develop your story; as in, instead of an actionless exposition on lore for 20+ pages, find ways to work in your societal commentary around what the characters are presently doing/saying

i tell myself that it's a great thing to be a loser as an artist because suffering builds character. but what happens when people no longer want to buy books about suffering? they just want vampires and sex and beautiful young boys or occasionally handsome men. what happens when people no longer read? we are the priests of a dying religion

>>22043861
the vampires in my book represent jews and homosexuals - you know, the things they originally were based on. and letting monsters do as they please is evil

>>22043861
People will always be suffering. We love suffering so much we invent new ways to suffer when the old ways bore us or are unavailable. To be human is lose, is to suffer, and to know it doesn't have to be this way.

```
He frowned a little.

Now, here is a little interesting tidbit about our hero here. As seen before, he wasn't a very expressive person. He was by no means an eternal blank mask of apathy, and it would je a disservice to claim that he didn't have as complex an emotional spectrum as any teenaged boy his age.
But in general, he wasn't one to show much emotion. Not unless it was deliberate. Or if his feelings "overflowed", so to speak, and his iron hard control was unable to stop them from leaking over.

In this case, it was the latter. He did not frown because he wished to show anger to a stranger. Nor did he do it because he felt very, very angry.

He did it because at that moment, his control slipped a teensy little bit and his mind reached a state that in a greater man could be considered "homicidal hysteria".

A certain green haired gentleman, in a brightly lit room, was about to be inconvenienced to levels he could not, and would not, survive. In body or spirit.

And all because a teenage boy had bad emotional control.

God is Great!
```

I'm trying to write funny dialogue that fits serious situations without degrading them. Did I do it right?

>>22043556
>write 'progression' literature
>trick people into subbing for a nonexistent resolution to a story that goes nowhere.
>using ai to correct your writing
>making 50k a year
If this is making it big i'd hate to see what moderately successful does to your prose.

>>22043458
Happy new thread!
You forgot the theme!
>https://youtu.be/=SJUhlRoBL8M

>>22043688
I somewhat regret reading this

>literal AI slop image
This guy needs to get a hobby.

>>22043980
I have a new hobby...making up for your incomplete OPs.

/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQ
RESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvC

Please limit excerpts to one post.
Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.
Follow prompts made below and discuss written works for practice; contribute and you shall receive.
If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.
Violent shills, relentless shill-spammers, and grounds keeping prose, should be ignored and reported.

Simple guides on writing:
>https://youtu.be/pHdzv1NfZRM
>https://youtu.be/whPnobbck9s
>https://youtu.be/YAKcbvioxFk

>fatty being triggered by a burger
Checks out.

>>22043980
just ignore him. he gets off on attention.
on another board there used to be a tripfag that would post so much that sometimes he would reply five times to one post, or even talk to himself, in order to kill a general he didn't like. he even waited until other people posted so he could make the conversation about himself. up to 70% of the posts in the general were his. in the end the jannies finally had enough and they banned him. the lesson is that replying to his posts did nothing and only made the problem worse, so it's better to just ignore the problem poster and wait for him to get banned.

>>22043688
It’s strange because it’s quite well written but it reads like it came out of a schizophrenic’s diary. I sincerely hope this is a work of fiction because work like this speaks to the modern spiritual war in profound ways

>>22043688
>I finger the hole one more time to feel for warmth and stuffed back in the drawer ready for next time.
you don't clean her? imagine the mold
yes i know you used a condom but still

>>22043842
Solid advice!

>>22043517
Check your email.

Guys, what's the shortest chapter in your current novel? Mine is just over 1000 words, and I feel that it might be a little short, but it doesn't neatly fit at the end of the one before it or the beginning of the one after. Most of my chapters tend to be on the shorter side anyway, often only really being a few scenes.

>>22044349
All of mine are at least 3000, usually 5000, sometimes almost 6000. I have an epilogue that is about 1000. I might rename it to a chapter but for now I havent thought about how to present chapters necessarily if I want to alter the flow at the end of the project. Can always refuse to number the chapters, or I could name them as scenes, or do any number of things.

TODAY i will write

I have stories to tell
but first I must master the Greek myths

do you need a certain type of personality to write literary fiction (or any certain genre)?

any good litfic writer can turn otherwise mundane experiences in to something novel.. but i've spent most of my life in some sort of materialist?? mindset, distilling everything around me into something to ignore.
not to mention my dopamine levels are probably fucked from being on the computer all day.

are most classic litfic authors walking around in some whimsical mindset? is this something i could fake/learn?

same deal with writing comedy id guess

legitimately not a fan of "show don't tell"
I'd rather an author "tell" to captivate the reader with their prose, and to make the characters dialog seem more human when they do speak and less like they're obviously made of cardboard just info dumping to the fourth wall.

>>22043688
That's, i , just, wow. Almost tile anon levels there my dude. Your candor deserves respect though.

Now for the daily rundown:
>Finished writing
>Dinner sorted
>Read above
>Anti-AI-Fag has taken over the OP and still replying to himself + trying to social engineer
>Other anons going about their business

Remember anons not shit posting = winning!

>time for a fap
No dolls involved

>>22044557
>is this something i could fake/learn?
yes but the problem with creative endeavors is that they're always going to be subjective, so you WILL put your heart and soul into something and truly believe its a masterpiece, and then be told that its worthless shit
eventually you might put out something worthwhile, but thats only a maybe, and the later you start, the less likely it will happen
BUT you still should try because doing it will probably make you a better person, and these things are more about the journey than the destination

>>22044559
>legitimately not a fan of "show don't tell"
it's probably not something you'd notice if done well
i even think you might be misinterpreting the concept

>>22044559
So, the only options you see are infodumping directly in the narrative or hamfisted expositing through the characters? In which case, I'm going to call you fucking stupid.

>>22044582
>>22044581
nobody does it well contemporaneously, its always obvious when its happening

>>22044583
actually I should unpack this
if its done well then it should be subtle, you should be given important information without necessarily knowing that its important. the attentive reader will simply remember what he reads when it becomes relevant.
the modern reader is not attentive, so "show don't tell" done well will result in the modern reader skimming over important bits and then getting the impression that the story is cryptic
"tell instead of show" keeps the reader engaged using evocative prose that still demands skill from the author and doesn't dumb down his audience.

so there

>>22044602
i understand exactly what you're saying, but i don't think it applies to 'show don't tell'. you're talking.. 'macro', i'm (the concept, generally) talking prose.

not sure of a proper term or how to succinctly put it

>>22044616
>you're talking.. 'macro', i'm (the concept, generally) talking prose.
I don't understand this schizo gibberish in the middle of your post

>>22044616
>>22044602
you could give me an example otherwise, and i will rewrite it

>>22044619
macro here implies 'larger scale' or 'broader context', retard

>>22044622
when Helen Burns gives Jane Eyre a rundown about the boarding school
I think its chapter 6 or 7, but you can just find a public domain copy and ctrl+f "rasselas" and thats when the conversation takes place
honestly we could have just inferred most of what she says if the story just plays out normally

>>22043919
There are a couple pulling 100k+ a year but the quality, while consistent, is mediocre at best. Its just high output low thought shit. The scariest part of it all though is that some of them believe they are genuinely creating a form of deep thinking art with life like characters..

>>22044636
>>22044636
brother.. this is like 200 year old prose fiction. it's purpose is more or less to be poetic, introspective, etc.
anyway sorry; but, you don't have a great argument and i don't see this going anywhere

how's discovery on RR? do you think pretty decent authors are being overlooked? i'd assume it'd come down to marketing and luck as much as anything but im not familiar with the scene

>>22044642

>>22044665
I chose it because its public domain and you could look it up
>but, you don't have a great argument and i don't see this going anywhere
meaningless drivel, AI tier. I could insert this into any discussion and it would be equally meaningless.

>>22044676
do you really think you've built up any real argument vs. 'show don't tell'? try again. seriously. try again, and i'll engage with it.
so far you're wasting my time. at least the (you) and bait is entertaining

>>22044676
>>22044681
actually, first demonstrate that you even understand the concept.

>>22044349
A good idea is to just forget about chapters right now. Think about scenes and cause and effect and write freely. You can chop it all up later :)

>>22044681
>>22044686
I explained why + posted an example, you've contributed zero substance in the span of 3 or however many posts you've made. literally zero. you have not shared a single idea.

>>22044694
your example is of "tell don't show", yes?

>>22044669
>Do you think pretty decent authors are being overlooked?
Yes. The most successful authors on the site work the tags and characters of their story to cater to the drooling masses. What i define a good author as being is not someone who writes; timmy did Y then his numbers went up so he can now dab over everyone. But someone who beats the preconceptions to become successful with their writing.

Couple of examples of good authors; 12 miles bellow, Vainqueur the Dragon, I am Not Chaotic evil. Yet those don't do anywhere near as well as something like 'Omg i'm a tree and i can cultivate!' type shit.

When it comes down to it (on that site at least) its just release schedule/tag bait/marketing and fellow author dick sucking.

>>22044694
Not that Anon, and I'm still wiring the tell/show distinction in my head.

I have this Jane Eyre chapter open in front of me. Where is there telling and not showing exactly? I always think it gets so murky with first-person narratives because their interior monologue naturally tells things sometimes, idk.

>>22044739
cool. i might check these out.

i initially tried to get into litrpg on recommendations from a friend, but they were embarrassingly shit-- one of the first ones he recommended was tree of aeons.
i was.. astonished. lifeless excuse for characters, dialogue. the 'worldbuilding' was unintelligent. the progression felt like reverse?? deus ex machina, where skills would materialize and conveniently solve a problem that wasn't yet introduced. the pacing was nonsense.
some of the other recommended litrpg were ESL abominations that would fail a middleschool creative writing assignment.

eventually i got into he who fights with monsters, which wasn't great but didn't constantly offend me with amateur writing. a few others after that, all passable.

>>22044754

his initial argument:

>legitimately not a fan of "show don't tell"
I'd rather an author "tell" to captivate the reader with their prose, and to make the characters dialog seem more human when they do speak and less like they're obviously made of cardboard just info dumping to the fourth wall.

it sort of reads like he had the term flipped.
i then asked for an example of "tell don't show"-- where i could rewrite it to show the difference (i was hoping he would write it).. and he gives this example.. a 200 year old classic, oozing with prose, but then vaguely describes tell vs. show again.

so, yea..

>>22044754
Its an example of show dont tell being transparent
fuck I cant with you people

>>22044754

his initial argument:

>legitimately not a fan of "show don't tell"
>I'd rather an author "tell" to captivate the reader with their prose, and to make the characters dialog seem more human when they do speak and less like they're obviously made of cardboard just info dumping to the fourth wall.

it sort of reads like he had the term flipped.

i then asked for an example of "tell don't show"-- where i could rewrite it to show the difference (i was hoping he would write it).. and he gives this example.. a 200 year old classic, oozing with poetic/descriptive prose, but then vaguely describes 'show vs tell', again.

>>22044768
Yeah it's got me awfully confused too. That prose is quite visual - an awful lot is shown.

I assumed it was more a rule to cut back on things that are happening that are impossible to visualise, like "his arm itched" or "there was an air of foreboding". I can't see many examples of that stuff happening in this chapter, most of it is at least pinned to something that is shown or is internal monologue.

Idk I'm a bit of a brainlet on this atm.

>>22044772
ok, but that's not what i asked for. why did you think i asked for an example that i would rewrite? did you think i was jumping in to collaborate on your retarded contrarian argument? that i was going to rewrite the example for your sake? retard?

>>22044772
What does transparent mean, exactly?
Have patience with me. I am not that other Anon.

>>22044785
I literally had no idea what you meant by the rewrite part so I ignored it. Still dont know what you meant by it
>>22044786
it means "obvious" in this context, meaning the literary mechanism the author is using is obvious
the literally meaning is "see through" like thin curtains

>>22044762
No probs and i aslo last intrest in he who fights with monsters after the death tournament/trial arc. Whatever you do don't read Delve, it is the biggest let down on that site! Second only to Magic Smithing(the authors about to go into his annual six month hiatus without warning his patreons again). Another thing to avoid are ones labelled "progression". It's basically code for doing the exact opposite with the story and characters.

>>22044789
Would you mind extracting a sentence from your example passage that is telling, not showing?

>>22044811
that is not why I posted it
I misunderstood what you meant because you only said an example, not of what.

>>22044812
What? You said it was an example of telling not showing being transparent. Given that the passage is rife with telling and now showing, as you say, it should be easy to extraact a sentence for us to look at. Please do so.

>>22044817
>You said it was an example of telling not showing being transparent.
where did I say that

>>22044812
you're talking to another anon there, but if you can demonstrate peak 'tell not show', where someone might be doing the opposite-- either rewriting a scene, or giving your own example, it might clear things up.

>>22044823
I think I misread you earlier, but I am completely fucking lost now.

>>22044823
>>22044823
I am completely fucking lost now.

Are you the tell don't show anon or the show don't tell anon?

>>22044827
This. This is what I want.

'Tell not show' anon, please actually back up what you're saying a proper, tight, clear example that isn't a large swathe of old text for us to pick around at. Thank you!

>>22044349
I believe my shortest is around 1700 words.
I could stretch it, but it is only as short as it is because I edited it down. I believe every chapter is just as long as it needs to be, and if one is too short or too long, so what?

Opinions on this dying earth WIP?

https://write.as/ibl6cla2oa4zh.md

>>22044868
>https://write.as/ibl6cla2oa4zh.md
I like the idea honestly. I don't have time to read it all, but I think there's a bit too much exposition at the start. Like this whole bit.

>In every vid, the same thing happens. They talk a big game about how they’re standing in darkness and nothing’s happening. Then at some point they see someone they know, usually standing motionless in a corner or doorway. In the videos where they shine a flashlight on the figure, it becomes briefly invisible while the light’s on it, fading back to solidity when it’s not.

>Light doesn’t kill them, but they sure don’t like it. In the videos they tense up, their outline gets fuzzy and they recoil from it. They retreat, but only far enough to get out of the light. Waiting patiently just beyond its penumbra, beckoning. Irene says they’re ghosts. I don’t believe that, but whatever they are, they can’t talk. Yelling questions at them produces no reply, just persistent beckoning and a warm smile.

Can't you write that into the story rather than just ramble on about it? It takes quite an interesting part of the book and makes it dull

>>22044836
i don't think we'll get a demonstration of anything. at least aside from dunning-kruger effect.
not to mention we've sent him on a sort of fool's errand. maybe he learns something from it.
i think he just wanted to say, as a typical contrarian 4channer does, that he's learned about 'show not tell' and is now stuck noticing it. though the egotistical twist is pretty backwards and upsetting to see.
anyway, there will be many such cases as you learn writing, 'tell not show' anon. you will start to notice *everything*.

>>22044884
I think you're right. Where he said:
>to make the characters dialog seem more human when they do speak and less like they're obviously made of cardboard
I think he meant the character of the narrator, and nobody else. I can understand that, but the limits of this rule are murky, and I don't think anyone can call themselves "not a fan" of the rule in general when in most other applications it makes writing more vivid, captivating and powerful - that's a strange thing to say.

>>22044881

This is good advice. I'll look into where such a scene might fit.

>>22043654
I do this but I also put notes to come back and find a better word later. This is probably the best solution, you'll come unstuck with time.

>>22043692
"said" is in a whole different category, it's possible to overdo it but you can't trust your initial instinct. If you do then you get the kind of amateur writing where people keep saying things like "the blonde-hared baker" ad nauseam instead of just writing "Anne".
For such conventional utility words I just write them out and trust myself to fix any problems during proofreading.

>>22043914
I think you've basically hit what you were going for but there are too many filler words, which is a general style issue unrelated to that attempt.
>Now here as seen before very by no means eternal blank it would be a disservice to claim that as any teenage boy his age but in general he wasn't one to much so to speak
You should probably remove or replace like two thirds of those, by volume.
This is natural. Writing is a process of putting words in and editing is the process of taking them back out. But it's a step you shouldn't skip.
(You also misspelled "be" as "je".)
Keep going!

if you go to the thesaurus to find a new word, NEVER trade a saxon word for a latin word.
>father -> patriarch
>luck -> fortune
>break -> respite
in fact, don't use latinate words at all

>>22043711
If you have a dialogue between two characters then you can skip "said" and just go back and forth once the two speakers are established. If you go beyond two then you can do the same but only if you establish that only two are speaking back and forth. Every time a third speaker gets involved you need to reestablish who is speaking.

If "said" gets monotonous then use a theatrical technique called "stage business." Don't have characters just say things. Have them do things as they talk.

Consider the conversation between Jules and Vince in Pulp Fiction. They have a typical back-and-forth conversation but they are not just sitting or standing. They are driving, gesturing, making facial expressions. They get out of the car, they open the trunk and get their guns. They enter the apartment building, ride the elevator, and look for the right apartment number. All of this happens while they discuss Big Macs in France and whether foot massages are sexual or not.

Think of it as the verbal equivalent to white room syndrome.

>>22043762
Average attention span is around five minutes. That's about 1,250 words. Put another way you need to grab the average reader's attention within your first one thousand words. 80/20 rules says that you need to make the first 200 words the most engaging i.e. the first minute of reading.

>>22045051
how? flagrant use of onomatopoeia??? action scene that i cant justify?

>>22044349
Make your chapters express complete actions and thoughts. A proper chapter has a beginning, middle, and end in itself. They do not start and stop just to break up the story.

>>22044557
I have a challenge for you: Write genrefic and scrape up against the limits as you know it. Find the fringes of your writing that go beyond your chosen genre as you understand it. There you will find what kind of a writer you really are. When you find out where you suffer within the Procrustean bed of strict and dogmatic genre writing you will find the voice and affectations that allow you to write anything.

>>22043762
i assume you're talking about knight of velora? it's not great. it's intentions are unclear. if you don't want an exciting first chapter, you have to hint at some trope or genre, but you aren't doing that. the reader has no expectations (aside from the RR description), and it doesn't alleviate that at all

admittedly skimmed it for the most part, but i was failing to see the genre or tropes come through, or the purpose of it all. who's it for? female mc? ok.. sure, but why is she being raped like 8 chapters in. i barely know any of the characters, what is this supposed to make me feel? not to mention incest. (im basically advertising this to degenerates now)

well, what do these scenarios say about the characters (especially in context of a mystery)? how have you demonstrated her competence or good values? you've demonstrated the opposite. so is this a story about growth as well? can you hint at what her goals are?

shit, maybe you've done this, but it read like she's approaching life like she's off to her 9-5 and the intro doesn't help. do something with the setting.

i glanced at like 2 days ago so forgive me if im way off on any of this. the point is, it didnt leave a great impression, and others are saying the same.

>>22044559
You do not seem to understand what "show don't tell" means.

>>22045028
Ever since I heard that kind of advice I immediately recognized its virtues but now I wonder how to stay on top of it. Is there a resource for recognizing saxon/Anglo words over latinate words?

Also, could you write stories with a latinate bias for effect?

>>22045028
>in fact
>fact

>>22045062
Honestly this where the art of writing comes in. Setting, characters, motivation, conflict, meaning, etc. You do not need to say everything all at once but if you can engage the reader with enough fundamentals to keep them reading then they will tend to read at least as much more as they have already read. Once you get further into your story you can lay out your greater plans.

>>22045070
yea.. conveniently enough, (if i understand correctly) i was planning to do this with fantasy, and that's why i've been reading litfic. i want to write good scenes without crutching on fantasy tropes or 'worldbuilding', and not just scenes that satisfy hero story structure and that sort of thing either.
anyway.. i will definitely be pushing myself to see what happens.

>>22045081
>Is there a resource for recognizing saxon/Anglo words over latinate words?
if you never took any latin classes, you'll need to look it up, but I'd guess that it's fairly intuitive
>Also, could you write stories with a latinate bias for effect?
sure, you can do anything for effect. The effect would be that your prose sounds like a legal document, but that could be interesting. For the opposite effect, see the book The Wake which intentionally only uses saxon words. Some people call it Anglish.

NEVER write the word "color". Use færbu

>>22045099
colour*

>>22045106
And don't even think about writing that one

>>22045093
I never took Latin classes but I have had some interest in linguistics for most of my life so I have some intuition. I shall seek out a resource though as I would prefer to go beyond intuition.

>>22043688
holy shit I kneel

ok, today i begin my life as a writer. now what do i do?

>>22045305
write

>>22043688
kino

>>22045305
Buy a pen, a notepad, and a college-rule notebook. Bring them everywhere and write down thoughts and ideas as they come to you.

Read. Fiction and nonfiction. Genre and literature. Modern and classic. Short stories and novels. Diversify.

Watch videos, listen to podcasts, read books about how to write. Study story theory. Learn ways to structure stories. Let these ideas percolate and compound within your brain.

Write a little at first. Write more every day. Build a habit. Put everything you absorb to practice and tinker with it

>>22045305
Once upon a time...

I've been depressed as fuck (worse then usual) for the past 6 months and managed to type up this fever-dream inspired story about a couple going through marriage counseling as they try and re-evaluate their lives and what brought them together, except they exist in a prototype nuclear submarine that is trapped under the artic ice and a fault is causing it to keep jumping through time and dimensions.

Then I woke up this week and realized what the fuck I was doing

>>22045468
That‘s basically how all fiction is written. You can‘t be sane and an author at the same time.

>>22045305
In quickness is truth.
Now start writing.

>>22045305
What app is this?
Anyway I always must follow the first question of writing, "do I feel like telling a story right now or not?"
Ask yourself right now if you are in the storyteller mood. If not, go for a walk. Or even perhaps go do something to get the experience needed to have a story in the first place.

>>22045312
>>22045453
>>22045517
on it

>>22045435
thanks

>>22045593
just word, ctrl+f1 to hide the ribbon; file -> account -> office theme -> black
and, i'm feeling it. just not set on anything, or organized. i'll freestyle in the meantime (starting now)
thanks

>put novel online for free
>0 reads
>k-pop boyband crossover 50 shades fanfiction
>1 billion reads
honestly can't wait for the end of humanity

>>22045681

>>22045681
ill read it

>>22045684
kek

>>22045681
I quit bothering long ago. It's unironically more rewarding to not publish anything and keep it all for yourself.

>>22045684
NTA but what does this have to do with being out of touch? Do you even understand what it means?

>>22045880
>anon stops being a teenager and now thinks all youth is rotten
A tale as old as time

>>22045681
1. You haven't found the intended audience for your work
2. Your work isn't good enough to please your intended audience
3. Your intended audience is really small

Some combination of above probably.

Compare to:
1. Romance slop is posted on wattpad, a website filled with its intended audience
2. Romance slopeaters don't care about quality just that certain genre beats are hit
3. Romance slopeaters are abundant

Stop pretending to be retarded. Thanks.

>>22045870
i'll read your book(s)

>>22045880
are you questioning the average YA enjoyer? let me guess, you think the top40s playing on the radio aren't actually the best 40 songs.

>>22045906
try this again, but this time be coherent.

>>22045918
So it's #2. Figured as much.

>>22045918
NTA but finding that post incoherent is hilarious. No wonder ur novel is shit

>>22045905
who mentioned youth? and are you implying that an authors success is entirely merit based, or?
listen, i don't doubt anon's work is shit, BUT.. lets be real.

>>22045923
how would they know at 0 views?

>>22045929
>who mentioned youth?
I don‘t know of many 60+ people that are fangirling over BTS
>merit based
Well, anon did.
>let‘s be real
No thanks, sounds lame

>>22043517
maat042@yahoo.com for those interested

>>22045963
"Around 40 percent of the audiences at BTS (Bangtan Boys) concerts in Seoul in October 2019 were aged 20 to 29 years old, followed by the age group of 30 to 39 years."

but that's beside the point..

the 2 lists are presumptuous and don't actually correlate.

pretty smug for a retard take. but sorry if 'coherent' wasn't the most apt.

larp'ing talentless faggot

>>22045991
>larp'ing talentless faggot
I will never recover

>>22045905
This is ackchually from a play by Aristophanes that made fun of Socrates

>>22046012
Even better

>>22045999
you couldn't even pretend in a single comment to know what you were being smug about, how are you supposed to convince any reader of anything?
and nice image?? retard. lets pretend you have a point

>>22046020
I‘m not the anon who wrote the list but your seething is delicious

>>22046012
>>22046019
We can go deeper, I've heard the quote was actually from a student's dissertation in the 1900s about ancient Greece.

What's a good option to look for snarky writers that can get very serious when the situation calls for it?

Fiction only. Preferably fantasy.

>>22046030
yea but you lapped it up. easily persuaded. traits of an intelligent person. good writer im sure

>>22046038
Interdasting. Reminds me of the bible.

>>22046055
I love you too anon<3

>>22045906
>1. You haven't found the intended audience for your work
yeah, I know. my intended audience is the tradpub community. can't get an agent to publish me (yet)

>>22046081
Wow, much surprise

>>22046088
yeah, i keep hearing about currently famous authors who had to write and query like 5-10 novels before they got accepted. and it's only getting harder with time. one day they'll publish me, though.

>write mai waifu
>Sex scene with monsters and other dudes
>None are self inserts
>Literally cuck myself

>>22046108
Pretty sure this is the anon crying over not being able to get published.

>>22045880
>doesn't appreciate the literary merits of k-pop x 50 shades crossover fanfiction
yeah you're out of touch

Just write k-pop fanfiction but make it literary

>>22046122
All literature is kpop fanfic at it‘s core.

>>22046019
>fedora and the god delusion
>also alex jones
more like the split personality starter pack

>>22046132
It is the same thing

>>22046122
this is unironically a good idea

>>22046122
I essentially did and it still doesn't get reads.

>>22046132
Anon, I...

>>22046146
You‘re not suppose to make it THAT nasty.

>>22045681
So imagine that you're a reader wading through mountains and mountains of content. Imagine you have no idea about story A from story B or story Z, etc. So now that you have imagined this person, answer the following questions about your own particular work
where did you post it?
does it have an interesting name?
what are the tags?
do you have an eye catching cover?
is there a blurb? is it intriguing?
how much shilling did you engage in once it was posted?
If your gut answer to any of those questions is: why does that matter the reader should just know I'm a genius, then get your head out of your ass, please, and fix your issue.

>>22046146
My Kpop x Ted Kaczynski erotic fanfiction doesn't get reads either

>>22046168
Criminal offense

>>22046048
Twain

>>22046165
>how much shilling did you engage in once it was posted?
None. I don't know how. I don't know where readers hang out. I just downloaded tiktok and am going to look for this "booktok" place. It also feels cringy to self promote, because when I see other people self promoting I think they're cringe.

>>22046186
so how about you answer the other questions, maybe direct people here to take a gander at what you've posted.
if you don't tell people they won't come

>>22046186
Yeah, I found booktok. Dear God. This is why people shoot up malls.
>>22046195
>dox yourself
No.

>>22046221
>dox
I'm not asking for your social and credit card numbers. whatever nigger, keep toiling in obscurity and bemoaning your fate

>>22046186
Has booktok worked?

>>22046243
I don't know, I just looked at it for the first time. Apparently it's just makeup-caked whores holding starbucks while showing off a pile of YA and romance books they've annotated to hell and back with color coded sticky tabs. I watched one video. The woman danced in her car for 6 seconds, then flashed the cover of a book on screen for half a second, so that you couldn't even tell what it was or anything about it. All they seem to read is pornography.

>>22046252
At least they read...

>>22046252
well yeah you went to booktok. if you want to talk to men who read books you need to go on reddit or youtube comment sections unironically

>>22046252
>doesn't want to post his work here
>is willing to crawl like a dog and show his unbleached asshole on tiktok
loving every laugh
remember that you get what you deserve

>>22045913
>i'll read your book(s)
Right now I would only make my work public behind a paywall. Not for the money, but because even a $0.5 commitment filters all the shitty undeserving subhumans that populate the internet. Obviously with piracy that's not achievable either, so I'm afraid that nobody will never see anything from me.

>>22046269
this sounds counterintuitive but piracy can actually help book sales. i've pirated books that i bought later because i enjoyed them and wanted them in physical form. if word of mouth is strong enough for your book people will buy it anyway

>>22046252
>I went to a social media community based around short videos
>why is this community filled with content catered to zoomers and social media types???
You don't have to worry about being cringe by self promoting, you're already cringe.

>>22046269
>literal unknown
>paywalls his shit
>w-why is no one reading my book

>>22046277
>piracy can actually help book sales
This is cope that pirates always spew to validate stealing, but as I said, it's not about sales. It's about depriving freeloading internet niggers from even seeing my work.

>>22046286
>everyone i'm talking to is one person

>>22046286
I don't publish anything. You don't even understand hypotheticals. Retard. People like you is why I don't put anything online.

>>22046299
>>22046300
oh sorry, there are two cringe losers. in fairness the other guy seems to just be paranoid about telling anyone about it. you, on the other hand, imagine your brain droppings are utterly unblemished and sneer at your potential readers

>>22046325
>calls other people retarded
>can't even tell apart who he is speaking to
why are you so angry?

>>22046291
>This is cope that pirates always spew to validate stealing
The EU has published a report stating that piracy helps media sales. I also know this to be true from personal experience. I have bought many books which I pirated beforehand, so the people who pirate are likely the same people who care enough to be your future consumers. Of course if you don't provide samples of your work no one is going to risk buying it. You should have a free weekend on Amazon or something like that as a promotion, it would allow you to receive positive reviews and attention. After reading the first chapter of Charles Dearmore's book Son of the Sun on Amazon I bought it and left a 5/5 review, so this strategy definitely works
>>22046341
in all fairness he's talking to three people (me and you two) so it's no wonder he is confused

>>22046325
I don't give a shit about functionally illiterate "potential readers" like you. l I'm not going to publish anything. It's all for me and only for me. My grapes are sour of course, so feel free to cope harder.

>>22046347
You niggers always spew the same droning shit. If it helps sales I wonder why companies are so hellbent on curbing it. Either way I don't give a shit about sales. I said it before. It's a matter of self-respect,

>>22046361
>If it helps sales I wonder why companies are so hellbent on curbing it.
But they're not. When's the last time your internet provider sent a letter to your house threatening you for torrenting? The companies stopped tracking it

>hurrr TikTok and books are shit!
>Nothing is literary!
>Post your work
>Posts iskekai fantasy bullshit
>Prose isn't great either
None of us should ever talk about litfic. Not a single /wg/ author has bothered with a litfic.

>>22046373
i still get them (in canada)

>>22046384
i'm writing a litfic disguised as a sci-fi thriller. it's called babalon's gate

>>22046384
emilyanon did and only 3 people bought it

>>22046373
When I see archives around 4chan I usually file a report and they take them down rather quickly. It's just that piracy is too hard to fight consistently.

>>22046384
It was a single anon who said tiktok was shit. Everyone else recognized it's just a different audience. If you want to appeal to that audience that's fine, but why would you complain about how different people have different tastes?

>>22046384
>anon losing his mind that I won't self-dox
So when i finally get published someone will dig up an old 4chan post and get me canceled? not falling for it. if you want to blame someone blame 4chan archiving services. it didn't used to be this way.

Crabs in a bucket

>>22046399
You're doing a good thing. I'm glad that the archives of relevance to my case went down eventually, but it's way better if you keep anything personal well away from this community. Especially since nobody here has anything of worth to say, just as with any other anonymous/pseudonymous community.

>>22046395
It was probably shit

>>22046419
youre moving the goalpost

>>22046140
It is, I'm writing something of the kind. I think 2/3 of my current readership is fujoshis and I'm still just writing what I feel like, having fun with my prose, reflecting on random topics I have strong feelings about. It works out as long as the core is intact.

>>22046146
Is your work a good instance of its genre? You have to feel the basic appeal and tap into it, using it as a disguise won't cut it. To write true k-pop fanfiction you have to be obsessed with a k-pop band.
My favorite web author is serializing a portal fantasy on Royal Road and it isn't doing numbers. Most chapters get one comment, clearly from an existing reader who followed him to the website. (I expect the author is okay with this and wasn't going for max appeal. Nevertheless.)
It's a good novel, in my opinion. All the characters have rich inner lives and exquisite sets of neuroses, the prose is wonderful, the plot is well-engineered, the worldbuilding really sells you on the idea that this isekai world was originally designed for 17th century English politician John Coke and hastily revived for the benefit of an American young adult.
But the average Royal Road reader as I understand him wants to get all vicarious about a main character who becomes super duper strong. And this doesn't work for that, not even a little bit, so they don't read it. It's a good novel but it's not a good escapist portal fantasy.
I'm sure you could write a literary litRPG whatever and still get a decent readership, but you'd have to love litRPGs. Maybe not specific litRPGs, I hear the peaks are still pretty low, but you'd at least have to think to yourself "these would be so good if they were good".

>>22046425
Is it even legal to use celebrities to write pornography? Are zoomniggers really this entitled?

>>22046425
There's an anon here writing a hilarious litrpg about some dark lord walking around doing quests.

>>22046397
Can confirm.

>>22046418
The archives should be purged every few years at least

>>22046440
>dark lord
I sleep

>>22046434
>Is it even legal to use celebrities to write pornography?
Yes, even in the UK
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Real_person_fiction

which tag is more powerful on RR, progression, or litrpg? it's also 'virtual reality'.

>>22046501
How can you have a litrpg without progression? Isn't that the whole point?

>>22046501
Uncle Ted was right

>>22046510
correct, but you can have progression without litrpg, so you'd use that tag in these cases. and you won't double up otherwise as that's redundant.
>>22046511
ur pisd

>>22046501
Sorry to say but due to rampant misappropriation progression tag now means the opposite on that site anon.

>>22046519
>redundant
nope. adding more (appropriate) tags will allow for more readers to find your work

Is there any market for non-gamified fantasy on RR? I'm working on a kind of bronze age heroic epic/ tragedy, and I've set it in a fantasy world to give myself lots of creative liberties with the story and setting. Are there people who would want to read this? I'm not interested in publishing anything or making any money, I just want to entertain people for free, but there's no point putting in the work if there's no readership.

>>22046553
>is there any market
>I'm not interested in publishing anything or making any money
Pick one, you either want to be successful or write to be occasionally read. Also people will read anything on that site as long as its free and not ESL tier english. Do not expect high levels of feedback either unless you attention whore yourself out.

>>22046575
>>is there any market
sorry, that was my mistake, I meant market just to loosely mean readership here, not a customer base.
>Do not expect high levels of feedback either unless you attention whore yourself out.
Shit, ok. I hate self-promotion, it literally makes me sick. Are there any instances of stories catching on on RR without aggressive shilling? Or is aggressive shilling a necessary prerequisite to getting readers?

>>22046419
It was better than Emily Project. More clear, more ambitious in scope, but still needed some nuance. I think he will improve.

>>22046590
the best way to get readers - aside from having at least semi readable prose, that's a given - is consistent and hopefully frequent updates. as far as posting time, I would not recommend doing so much earlier than noon PST

i actually started my book today
what do you think about machine-gunning out a prototype story (at least part of one) and the.rewriting?

>>22046943

Sculptors can't begin sculpting until there's a block of marble to work on

>>22046943
I think it is a good idea to have a first draft. Writing anything is good practice as you begin to understand what actually reads good.
I wrote 200k words and looking at my first chapters compared to my latest ones was painful so I spent about two weeks editing it all to bring it in line with my current quality.
There has been times when I write just a few chapters, and then in editing I see how I can add in-between chapters to flesh out the story.

>>22046943
Do it. The faster you realize how many problems your story has the sooner you can make a better one.

is it easy to make lets say, 1k a month on rr?

>>22047038
no

>>22047038
rr is very much feast or famine, with a small percentage doing very well and everyone else hoping for a couple views. if you're an existing popular author, or if for some reason your work catches lightning in a bottle, you'll do well. if not the best you can hope for is a gradual addition of readers to help your next novel hopefully catch fire.

>>22047038
It seems very hard to make money at all by writing fiction

>>22043458
this image has been my banner on wechat for like 6 months
kinokinokino

>>22043561
>$100 a week
where?

>>22043688
preaccepted to issue48 of miniMAG
email to minimagsubmissions@gmail.com
(i most likely will not see this thread again)

>>22044868
this is neat
would do a <2500 word excerpt in an upcoming issue

>>22047159
issue46 out now
full issues: minimag.space
submissions: minimagsubmissions@gmail.com

I will submit to minimag if you promise not to involve yourself in the same drama as the other publications from here

>>22047159
>>22047163
>AI slop poster thinks people want to be in his larp mag

Anti-AI-fag thinks people share his hate boner when the only ones supporting his views with (you)'s is clearly himself

>>22047413
>AI poster runs the mag
never mind

>>22047163
I'm not opposed to AI art but I know it would be possible to generate a picture where her arms work and she doesn't have three legs
You still gotta have standards, it doesn't bode well for the writing

>>22047469
yeah he should at least remove the back leg in photoshop or find someone who does

Writing a 2000 word script for a youtube video is worth at least 1000 words of prose, right? Right guys?

>>22047538
I've done that before, scripts are way different from books and feel different to write. 2000 words is not as much as you think it would be.The priority should be communicating at a pace your audience will understand. If that means pausing or inserting transition words that wouldn't be present in formal essays then do that. But make sure there's a structure to it all and that your arguments make sense, otherwise people won't return to watch your videos

>>22047538
If you use proper formatting then you are looking at about one minute of video per page of script. However, it will mostly be narration. Average reading speed is 260wpm. Let's be conservative and assume that reading out loud is about half the speed. Get a word count and divide by 125 to get an estimated runtime.

>>22047538
Depends on how good it is. On average it's not. Also what's your channel?

>have lots of preferences for various aspects of writing
>e.g. prefer wholesome main dynamics with little drama, expansive wide reaching lore, comfy slice of life elements
>almost none of it is in my writing and in fact it's usually the opposite

Artificial Academy 2 General /aa2g/ #1279
Who Framed /aa2g/? Edition

Welcome, this general is for the discussion of ILLUSION's Artificial Academy 2.

COPY ERROR MESSAGES WITH CTRL+C, PASTE THEM WITH CTRL+V INTO GOOGLE TRANSLATE. JUST CLICK THE WINDOW AND PRESS CTRL + C, IT WORKS.

>Downloads:
/aa2g/ Pre-Installed Game, AA2Mini: https://tsukiyo.me/AAA/AA2MiniPPX.xml
AAUnlimited updates: https://github.com/aa2g/AA2Unlimited/releases
Anon's Modded Pre-Install: https://pastebin.com/42JS3q6E

>Information:
AA2Mini Install Guide:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vS8Ap6CrmSNXRsKG9jsIMqHYuHM3Cfs5qE5nX6iIgfzLlcWnmiwzmOrp27ytEMX03lFNRR7U5UXJalA/pub
General FAQ:
https://web.archive.org/web/20200216045726/https://pastebin.com/bhrA6iGx
AAU Guide and Resources (Modules, Tans, Props, Poses, and More):
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/17qb1X0oOdMKU4OIDp8AfFdLtl5y_4jeOOQfPQ2F-PKQ/edit#gid=0

>Character Cards [Database], now with a list of every NonOC in the megas:
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1niC6g-Xd2a2yaY98NBFdAXnURi4ly2-lKty69rkQbJ0/edit#gid=2085826690
https://db.bepis.moe/aa2/

>Mods & More:
Mods for AAU/AA2Mini (ppx format, the mediafire has everything):
https://www.mediafire.com/folder/vwrmdohus4vhh/Mods
/aa2g/ Modding Reference Guide (Slot lists for Hair/Clothes/Faces, List Guides, and More):
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1gwmoVpKuSuF0PtEPLEB17eK_dexPaKU106ShZEpBLhg/edit#gid=1751233129
Booru: https://aau.booru.org

>HELP! I have a Nvidia card and my game crashes on startup!
Try the dgVoodoo option in the new win10fix settings.
Alternative: Update your AAU and see if it happens again. If so, disable win10fix, enable wined3d and software vertex processing.
>HELP! Required Windows 11 update broke things!
winkey+R -> ms-settings:developers -> Terminal=Windows Console Host

Previous Thread:
>>428858839

>>22047655
game is shit, its unoptimized and unintuitive as hell, and it takes forever to get sex

how do i learn to really understand how someone genuinely dumb bordering retarded works so i can write that kind of character
>inb4 look in a mirror

>>22047667
literally look in a mirror
you weren't born intelligent, so if you cant understand why someone could be dumb then you havent stopped being dumb yourself yet

>>22047670
i am at least average and am literate. I've also been through university. I am talking about exceptional stupidity and uneducated

>>22047681
my statement stands
having your opinions validated by the system proves nothing. Everyone should go through a moment of intense correction (not just teaching a blank slate, but rather the specific confrontation that you thought you know is wrong)
if you havent gone through this (and evidently you have not) then you're probably an intellectual child or an NPC

>>22047690
>rather the specific confrontation that you thought you know is wrong)
that what you thought*

>>22047593
Do you wsnt to listen to me talk about Gaunt's Ghosts for 11 minutes?

>>22046511
I still can't believe that people read this shit.

>>22047667
Observe retarded people. Sam hyde is doing an internet show where he streams boring retards 24/7.

>>22047690
>>22047694
I seriously don't think you're understanding what I'm saying and seem more determined to make some kind of philosophical statement. I think you just wanted to insult me from the start.

>>22047706
>I think you just wanted to insult me from the start.
definitely, because you have an incredibly huge ego and need a reality check that you aren't as intelligent as you think you are
but what I said is still true and relevant. Imagine saying "I've been through university" as if thats a metric for intelligence. you're out of touch, and your lack of understanding how *people* work (not just uneducated people) is going to be exposed through your writing
>seem more determined to make some kind of philosophical statement
any answer you would have received would have been a philosophical statement, retard.

>>22047731
I don't think you understand. I'm talking about actually stupid.

>>22047747
>>22047670

>>22047749
Listen man. I'm actually using a different definition of stupid than you. I seriously didn't mean it as an insult or anything. You're trying to die on a hill that isn't really there. Nobody is arguing against you.

>>22047731
And i didn't use university as a metric for intelligence I used it as a metric for formal education.

How can I improve, bros? By just writing nonstop? I don't think I'm capable enough to publish something, but I like to write and I want to improve a little bit.
I'm not fluent enough in English so I write in Spanish.

>>22047753
your definition is this
> I am talking about exceptional stupidity and uneducated
conflating uneducated with "exceptional stupidity" is insulting, but I know you didn't mean harm by it. I'm genuinely informing you, as someone that can say things to you that real life acquaintances won't say to you, that you are much stupider than you think. that isn't a knock to you, its a part of the human condition (and being informed about the nature of the human condition is paramount in order to write complex characters)
>>22047762
have you ever been confronted with something and didn't know how it worked? have you ever made assumptions about how something worked and ended up being disastrously wrong? its this. this is what stupidity is. and if you're adventurous and wisdom seeking, then it should happen on a regular basis.
the complexity occurs when you write how characters respond to it, with the "stupid" characters would probably more likely to repeat their errors than to learn from them. just be careful about making them one dimensional

>>22047776
I didn't conflate stupidity with uneducated. thats why I used the word "and" in that sentence and not the word "or".
>you are much stupider than you think
You seem to think I have some kind of ego. I never said I was smart. I just asked about someone stupid.
>have you ever been confronted with something and didn't know how it worked
> its this. this is what stupidity is
again I am not talking about that when I say stupidity.
I am talking about someone who is actually stupid and uneducated anon.

Words stupidest argument going on in the thread right now

>>22047790
>I am talking about someone who is actually stupid and uneducated anon.
I'm going to break this down simply for you
>be you, average guy
>be adventurous and wisdom seeking
>if you're adventurous, you're now the least experienced in the room. if you're wisdom seeking then you're now the least educated
>now you're making mistakes. now you're scared. now you're nervous. now you *feel stupid/uneducated*
>now you can relate, somewhat, to who you're trying to write
you're looking for someone to just *tell* you what its like, when the experience is right there for the taking and honestly it should be a rite of passage.

>>22047811
Again you are misunderstanding entirely what I mean by stupidity. I just wanted to write some fun litrpg stuff man. You took this whole thing really personally for some reason. I was saying like a mono-syllabic cave man type guy with no education totally naive

>>22047819
why does it matter then? just write a one dimensional stupid caveman
I was under the impression you wanted to write good, sorry

>>22047830
>assuming hes one dimensional because he's stupid.
You need a reality check on your ego. That's fucking ridiculous.

>>22047859
your use of the phrase "I just" in response to my advice implied that, not me.

So here's how you write a stupid character. Simple goals, simple thought processes. Not terribly observant. Let's consider a nigger. It turns out that planning for the future isn't their strong suit. The languages they developed back in africa don't conceptualize time very well. A smart person plans for the future and exhibits delayed gratification. A stupid person doesn't think very far ahead and prefers to live in the moment.

>>22047887
>didn't even (you) the anon that asked
Cunningham's law. You only want to be part of the conversation to pat yourself on the back.

>>22047892
your back and forth shitflinging doesn't qualify as a conversation.

stupid is the anon and whoever keeps replying to him
anyway i'm g going to 7/11 you guys want something

>>22048264
Some porkpies and a litre of whole milk

>>22048264
Their entire stock of these.

just had a dream where i was looking through games on steam, and i came across one game with 2 listed developers: (cantremember), F. Gardner

so i check out the first screenshot, and it's a traditional looking french chef, in the style of psychonauts or something, with subtitles reading: "(something about trying to polite, but), we cook to taste yæsterday, yæsterday, yæsterday" and then i woke up to a phonecall from my dad

>>22048439
Gardner, this is the writing general, a place meant to be safe from your drivel. Shilling is also against the rules

>>22048439
Just report for "advertising/begging" and ignore.

>>22043688
Put me in the screencap

I'm trying to write dialogue for a schizo character but all I can come up with are fairly surface level redpills that I don't even disagree with. Any tips?

>>22048567
you can find lots of schizo writing (actual) online. think stream of consciousness + dream logic.

>>22048582
I feel like schizo writings are a bit different to schizo talking.

>>22048587
find a diary. and it's similar enough. a childhood friend went schizophrenic, and the shit he would tell us was quite fucking insane. ex
"i was lying on my bed, and there was a swarm of bees outside my window, i was just like lying there and they were flying into it. and then the BEE KING came through. he told me, NO MORE WHACKING OFF"
he'd also tell us about the queen planning to give him gold, or rhiannas new song about him and some girl. (he'd even tell me the lyrics, just as insane)
anyway.. yea

>>22048612
Jesus now that's pretty out there. My only experience with schizos outside of Friday night drunk homeless people was a friend who fried her brain on LSD and tried to convince me there were numbers hidden in music. Like she whipped out her iPod touch, played Abba and just started saying random numbers out loud. I'll keep an eye out for online schizo diaries but where does one even find them these days? (Don't say /x/)

>>22048630
I could post an excerpt from my diary desu in like 8 hours. I’m about to go to sleep—it’s 5am.

>>22048632
Sure, I'll always be here except when I'm not. Good night anon

>>22048567
The Inferno by Strindberg is an alright schizo diary that digs into the obsession with patterns and shows the grandiosity. Won't help you with surface level dialogue but may help you understand the mindset. (I don't think "redpills" are a very good way to look at it, and it's not even necessarily dream logic.)
Maybe the TempleOS website? There should be an archive floating around.

Do you guys bother including visual motifs in your writing? I try to imagine my descriptions of the physical space like a movie being shot. In the first chapter of my work I include a lot of circles. Is there any way that this will be conveyed in writing if I don't mention circles specifically? Like if I include an eye, the moon, a cup of tea, a spotlight, etc, is the reader going to realize circles are a motif or will it not be properly conveyed unless I specifically state things are circles? I don't know, and I'm wondering if any other anons have this issue.

>>22048794
Visual motifs work in films because films are visual and so it's tremendously easy and low-friction to show a circle.
Words aren't like that. They make this hard and they make other things easy. Look for different motifs, either concrete or abstract, that are easy and/or compelling to mention in writing.

>>22048790
Thanks anon, thank God Project Gutenberg has a copy readily online.

>>22048833
if you want to enter the mind of a schizo just look up famous cult leaders. L Ron Hubbard the founder of Scientology was a paranoid schizophrenic

>>22048805
Example of ones to use that arent visual?

>>22048835
I've already looked at Waco, Heavens Gate and Jim Jones (which gave me great ideas for horrible cult-based stories and how to incite paranoia in people). I try to stay away from Scientology as a whole because you know... Alien niggas and shit..

>>22048838
What about Rajneeshpuram? There are two good documentary series about it, one on youtube, and one by netflix.
What I found striking was that they have interviews with cult members, or rather, former cult members since it was dissolved. So you have a doctor and a lawyer, supposedly intelligent people, but they cannot, even after decades, see through the lies that they were told.

>>22048842
The one with Reignbot or Down The Rabbit Hole right? Saw it a while ago but largely forgot, still bizarre shit all to inflate some jeet's sick minded harem of underaged girls. idk if that comes across as schizo though, like it's weird shit but fairly tame when it comes to cults.

>>22048848
I seem to recall the vice leader (who I trying to stop the leader from killing himself) was cultivating biological threats and they blended a beaver injected with HIV up so they could try to put it into the water supply of the town.
It has its own wacky shit, even if the leader was more of a charlatan than a schizo, the vice leader seemed absolutely insane and bought into his words enough to justify her own actions.

>>22048853
>they blended a beaver injected with HIV up so they could try to put it into the water supply of the town.
Lmao, man I love IRL scooby doo shit

>>22048612
I know someone like this and his brain is so bombed out I cant comprehend his behavior. But what I have seen from some mentally illness as a result of past drug use is that they seem (seem) to lack self-awareness and not know when to stop talking. They don't when things are inappropriate, cant tell the difference between the mundane and profound, will initiate dialogue but appear to talk to themselves instead of the people around them and dont even wait for replies which usually dont come anyways.
>so here i am walking just outside this building so I thought I'm about to go inside it and shit. (last two words added for vagueness, not literal)
>And like yeah I was team sony but now I'm with microsoft now but it's an unsteady alliance you know what I mean I watching you xbox you're not watching me
>and I heard anon was in state (as in prison) you know anything about that he not deployed any longer he already back

>>22048567
I know a woman who is schizo.
My mother sometimes drives her into town for things, and I was once riding with her on one of these trips.
Highlights include
>Asking to see a recipe book about noodles and claiming that they stole all of her work to make it.
>Asking my mom to pull into a random person's driveway while claiming that my father said to do it and when she refused she slammed her hands on the dashboard
>Claiming that her neighbor was poisoning her rain water barrels so she needed my mother to bring her to dollar general to buy soda
>Claiming that her neighbor poisoned her cat food so she needs to keep buying bags before she was finished with the last one.
She would constantly jump from one tangent to another, leaving her thoughts half finished, and also having entire full conversations where it seemed like she was speaking to someone else even if I did try to speak with her.
She freaked me the fuck out and the entire time I was behind her I was worried that she was going to grab the steering wheel and I'd have to pull her off of my mother. Though she was never violent beyond striking the dashboard, that was the last time that my mother drove her anywhere. Just being around her is stressful and I convinced her that you just can't trust her since even she doesn't know what she is going to do.

my first book will be good

>>22048946
Same.
I forget his name, the author of Maze Runner insisted to every writer their first book will be shit no matter what. Good thing you don't have to publish it and can learn from the experience. I dont exactly agree with him but he does have a point.

>>22048946
>my first book wont be good

I wonder when the anti-ai-fag will trigger and make a new thread to further his conservative views on creativity?

>>22049322
They have to let him out of his box first.
Until then, enjoy the new thread: >>22049512

>>22048835
L. Ron Hubbard was perfectly sane.
The real problem is that he ran across MK Ultra back in 1951.
Read the "hypnotic level" section of "Science Of Survival" and realize what he's actually describing.
The Deep State (specifically, our nation's intelligence services) completely lost their shit, and have been out to get him ever since.
And you not only believe their bullshit, but repeat it, and march in lockstep with them. Shameful.

Real new thread (ignore AI troll)
>>22050798
>>22050798
>>22050798
>>22050798

>>22050799
Forgot the title
>>22050831
>>22050831
>>22050831

just

fuck

already