/lit/ - Literature

>>22000442
bukowski sucks

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yfcKdLQL1w

I think after Bukowski is second to Shakespeare in how funny he is. i spend some afternoons just giggling about the titles to his books.

>>22000442
L E M O N A D E

>>22000451
>not dead before 2000
>woman
>defended by limp whiteknight
zoom zoom zoom

>>22000442

>>22000488
pre-khmer cambodian music is based, there's nothing wrong with that anon at all
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LKkQJOAlc6c

>>22001110
I hate communism so God damn much

>>22001140
it wasn't real communism

>>22001110
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=obQDFh6vz4M

>>22000451
LMAO

kant's circus
nihil unbound
atheist at barnes and noble

>>22001145
>no money
>no class
>no state
How was it not communism?

>>22001777
nice digits

>>22000442
I got lucky. Never had a job. Then again, I'll never know the pain of having a crap job and using that experience to write books.

>>22000488
i'd read that book

>>22000442
>live

>>22000442
Anyone have the one about both 1984 and Brave New World being about how living in England sucks?

>>22004261
kek

>>22004276
john anik?

>>22000488
>if you don't know the ins and outs of Marxist theory you are a nazi(?) and can't write althis
Why are they like this?

bump

>>22006012
Ryan Gosling.
"Woah, he's literally me" actor reading the "Woah, he's literally me" book

>>22000488
>almost two years later
where are we? do we get to read cambodian kino or not?

>>22008752
why is the judge using a flint-lock? I thought Blood Meridian took place when that stuff was obsolete?

>>22008820
'cuz doing that twists up your soul. degeneracy means to sink yo a lower level, to start acting more like an animal than a human. Doing shit just to spite other people means becoming less than human.

>>22008867
actually based, I might finish Dostoevsky after all. Why is Russian literature so good, bros? After reading one part of Dostoevsky or Tolstoy, I feel satisfied that I have no will to continue.

>>22000442
someone post the obligatory Hegelian witch cap

>>22008886
It does take place, some poor Mexicans still use them.
His clothing isn't fitting correctly either.

>>22000488
Pol Pot was cool

>>22006057
They’re gatekeepers

>>22008854
Reminds me of the time I wrote lesbian erotica about my female classmates and showed it to my friends

>>22008886
Flintlocks are still appropriate for the time period (1840s)

>>22008761
über-based

>>22008854
This is what happens when you let your kids read books by jews.

does anyone have the screencap of anon explaining to his mother why her argument are false based on kants "critique of pure reason".

>>22001777
Wtf I am communism.

>>22000488
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ipq4FefX5Ps

He definitely was inspired to do this after watching this documentary.

>>22000442

>>22001777
Retard

>>22008761

>>22008860

>>22009769

>>22008867

>>22009539

>>22009101
>Why is Russian literature so good?
Because suffering is the greatest source of inspiration, and there is no greater suffering than being Russian.

>>22001777
>no class
>still has a party structure
Stop being a midwit. It was agrarian socialism at best.

>>22009812
>Unfortunately I've spent the last 7 years of my life pretty much exclusively reading Kant and secondary sources on Kant, so I don't really have a good grasp of non-Kantian morality.
This is sublime, in a bad way

>>22009796
>unironically Yes

>>22008898
good post

>>22000442

>>22000697
High school humor

>>22010055
Struck a nerve, eh?

>>22000442

>>22009789
>Dalmatia
>grow vegetables
How? I've been there a couple of times and it's a fucking desert

>>22010202
You'd be surprised how quickly a desert can grow. The gobi desert used to be a grazing ground for xiongnu/mongols

>>22008886
Makes him that little bit more atavistic. Had flintlock usage in the Civil War as well (percussion caps probably more expensive at the time than just shelling out a bit more powder for the flint pan)

>>22008820
Should start buying featherless chickens and leave them next to the shit

>>22010239
In modern times, the San Joaquin Valley is both a desert and one of the largest food producing regions in the world.

>>22011928
I don't think I'll ever get sick of this one

>>22011928
Everytime I see this post I think about how sick of a novel this would be. Guy joins a literature club and his life deteriorates as the books he reads psychologically ruins him.

>>22004276
new persona just unlocked

>>22008886
Trapdoor springfields like that were commonly used for like half a century after the time Blood Meridian took place

>>22004261
>>22000442
based format

>>22010202
do you also think Aristotle looks like a modern Greek person?

>>22010055
> High school humor

Posting the first of two classics

And now the second of two classics
I've actually always wanted to perform this one. I tend to wrinkle my nose at most of those "read comments in a funny voice and gain revenue" YouTube channels. But I enjoy voice acting, and lord knows I've got a fuckload of excellent screencaps from almost every board.
So let me know if you faggots want me to record myself doing this one. The recording wouldn't really "fit in" on either of my two YouTube channels, but I'd still be happy to post a link to an audio file here.

And that's about all I have for tonight. There are plenty of other /lit/ screencaps in my "lit" folder, but they're more in the "interesting" or "well-written" category, and wouldn't really be best for a "humor" thread.
I'm going to bed now. The offer I made in >>22013266 still stands. If I see that people are interested in that when I get up tomorrow, I'll create an audio file and post it to the thread.

>>22013222
holy shit that is fucking hilarious

>>22013272
Ok but anon is 100% in the right here.

>>22013236
That hits hard. I have experienced this IRL, where people just did not want to be exposed to something new.

>>22013285
kek, the last one with cagney and moonshine
literally me

>>22013285
>Milk is for the pussy
lol, this guy really got cucked by an insane giga-autist.

>>22013266
you should do it. Make sure to use a British accent when you do, it wouldn't align with the text otherwise.

>>22014424
Thank you, I will.
But I don't think my British accent is good enough, so I'll probably just use my own New England accent. Don't worry, I'll still do voices and make it dramatic enough; you'll see.

>>22001777
>no state
Lel [citation needed]

>>22013217
Earl sweatshirt isn't a sub 80 iq

>>22014424
>>22014446
>>22013266
All right, I've finally finished recording this thing. Now to edit all these clips together in Audacity. I'm not the best at Audacity, so bear with me: I'm likely to take a bit longer than I probably should.
In the meantime, I feel like this kind of thing should have classical music playing at the beginning and end of it. Kind of like "Masterpiece Theatre," or some high-end radio drama. But unfortunately, I'm not sure which classical pieces would be best. All I can think of is that song they keep using in "Barry Lyndon," and I feel like using that myself would be a little too derivative.
So if any of you /lit/izens know of some good classical pieces that could serve as intros or outros, let me know. It would be greatly appreciated.
In the meantime, if this thread isn't up by the time I've finished, I'll create a new one to post the final product. BRB.

>>22013297
I'll always be happy at seeing this post. That fucking guy needed to hear that, even though he then went on to have several more meltdowns about Disco Elysium over the following months.

>>22014764
the thread will live

>>22014937
Well I could still use some classical music recommendations, though. I feel like it would make the recording a whole lot better.

>>22008860
I've seen this meme so many times, never got a laugh even once. Maybe after 1918th time I will kek, shit my pants and cum maybe

>>22009789
cabbagesed

>>22014982
pick anything you like.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XfEE-GoJS2E&list=PLU1vzYQWSdMvoF2HqfWe2gr0_kAbVpo7J
#8 can offer some exquisite mood

>>22015106
Beautiful, thank you.
I'll get back to work on my radio drama. It probably won't be finished until much later today, since I have other obligations to attend to, and am technically not even supposed to be working on this right now. But I'll get it done for you anons.

>>22014982
https://youtu.be/cRZU5gbqyJg

>>22012613
That's kind of Sadly, Porn (by Edward Teach, aka The Last Psychiatrist). The footnote structure is sublime and irritating.

>>22013225
The poster is not wrong but the Iliad's structure is an excellent battle shounen. The backstory and hyping up characters and little filler bits are all perfect. The scene where Odysseus is drawing the fuckhuge bow is especially hype.

>>22014764
use beethoven's op 106, the third movement
I think this one might be the best ones out there
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_7HaIJSjY8
as much as I like gould his playing is more often than not a curiosity, rather than a performance

>>22008886
It's not a flintlock, but even if it was it would be appropriate for the setting and time period.
>>22012652
It's not a trapdoor retard

>>22009483
holy fucking based

>>22013266
I want to hear. I actually entered this thread to post this image but you already did. It's a modern /lit/ classic

>>22016352
Almost done. Just gotta edit the music together, re-record some lines I slurred, and maybe add some sound effects.
>>22015190
I was genuinely considering this for my intro, but I thought it sounded too medieval. I wound up going for something more Elizabethan instead.
Still, I appreciate your input, and am grateful that you introduced me to this song. Let it be known that I've added it to one of my playlists.
>>22015446
This is a lovely piece as well, but I think it sounds a little too cheerful for what we’re going for. It'd work better as something for an unironic children's book. The point here is to be overly-dramatic.
Still, it's a lovely piece. And I appreciate all your contributions. I'll try to get this finished soon.

>>22016471
It’s no rush bro, you can just post it tomorrow if you want. It might go viral or at the very least be shared around here. May as well make it perfect

>>22016471
>>22016913
Also something by Schubert would probably be most apt. Maybe something more subdued than dramatic but I’ve always considered Schubert to be the most melancholic composer; just off the top of my head

https://youtu.be/kI1O7HX2TKk
https://youtu.be/uzjYQuDPi9Q

>>22001110
Are there any videos of that Sinn guy playing his mandolin?

>>22000442
Terminally unfunny

>>22016913
Well I'm making it as good as I can, but I must warn you all that I'm still not great at Audacity, and getting the volume control right isn't quite so easy for me.
Regardless, it's almost done, and I'm about to post it. I'll also post the audio-only tracks, if one of you guys wants to mess around with the volume control yourselves.
>>22016977
Thanks, but I'm a little late in the process for that now. Please stand by

>>22016471
>>22016977
Thinking on it more I think Reliques second movement would be nice or for something more subdued the second movement of Gasteiner.
https://youtu.be/xSuHPEcOW7g
I’m on my phone right now but they’re both in this playlist
4:25:54 and 3:38:58 respectively

I’m not trying to get ahead of myself and force something onto you, I just can’t help but be enthusiastic when the topic of classical music comes up.

>>22017067
Lol it's ok anon. Link incoming.

>>22015935
Yeah but it almost got suspended plus I was a turbovirgin at the time and hadn’t seen pussy outside of my dads porno magazines

>>22013266
>>22014424
>>22014446
>>22014764
>>22014937
>>22014982
>>22015106
>>22015159
>>22015190
>>22015446
>>22016352
>>22016471
>>22016913
>>22016977
>>22017058
>>22017067
>>22017082
Oink, I say. Oink.
https://voca.ro/1nBUYavvFycD

>>22013236
>>22013533
You’re pretentious and the poster in the image you’re replying to is such a pseud that he hasn’t even read Frankenstein

>>22017095
cool, now I'm gonna edit it into a video, monetize it and pretend it's all mine

>>22017095
Very kino. Definitely needs work on the mixing though, it goes from quiet to loud mid word.

>>22017095
This was really good. You really got the personalities of the characters down to a t and the presentation in general was great. Only complaints i have was that you got a little too hammy (heh) with the prideful brother's voice, and, as the other anon mentioned, your audio is a little messed-up. All-in-all however, an exceptional performance for a (presumably) amateur voice-actor.

>>22009769
More accurately "Just don't go to Sweden, Queen Christina is a bitch."

>>22017114
this
>grunting like a Frankestein
what a fucking pseud

>>22017126
Eh... guess I shoulda plugged my own YouTube channel in here somewhere. But whatever: https://www.youtube.com/@heretoruinyourfun

I'll warn you guys in advance, though: this is one of those dumb "review channel" things. And so far, all I've uploaded are things related to comic-book villains. And I'm also still obviously getting used to the editing software. So you're gonna be very disappointed; just a head's-up.

But I plan to move onto other subjects later. Video games and animation and musicals and whatnot. I'm not sure whether what I just recorded would fit in on this review-channel thing, but I might upload it elsewhere.

In fact, I'm already planning to start a completely DIFFERENT youtube channel later down the line. This one will be devoted to various parody songs I plan to write. I've already written lyrics about that "I Hate The Antichrist" meme, and am gonna post the final result to the /wsg/ schizo thread when I'm done recording.

>>22017150
Yeah... sorry about that. Idk how to Audacity. Here's the voice-only version of the tracks, for those who want to mess with it.
https://voca.ro/18cdbVuR6p2U

>>22017210
Thanks, anon. I appreciate your vote of confidence.

>>22017126
fuck off nigger I'm gonna edit it faster, and post it on some mega folder just to fuck with you

>>22017095
for the love of christ, please upload the audacity project and share the link so I can master it before moving on to >>22017423

>>22017423
>>22017480
although I've drunk 4 liters of beer, I'll go to sleep sober (likely very soon) which is good news
because I won't be hungover, I'll be able to edit first thing in the morning
keep the thread alive until then

>>22014506
Unironically relatable with old philosophy books.

>>22009802
oh lord have mercy, my sides

>>22009812
yes this, holy shit you found it

>>22012148
This isn't a good example: the Tulare Valley was practically drained by 1900. Before then, the San Joaquin was mainly swamp (from the Buena Vista and Kern Lakes up to Carquinez Strait) and riparian woodland fed by rivers flowing from the Sierras down to Tulare Lake. The flat portions to the west of Tulare Lake were grassland.

>>22017423
>>22017480
>>22017683
I'm not sure what incentive I have to do this, since it sounds like you're both just gonna pretend you did it yourselves.
But whatever. Do you need an account to use mega? I'll post a link soon enough.

>>22018410
>it sounds like you're both just gonna pretend you did it yourselves
not me, I'm the second anon
the thing is if we're going to do this, let's do it right
your recording needs some editing here and there because the levels jump from really quiet to earrape
just like you, I will upload the video file to mega and let anyone do whatever the fuck he wants with the file

>>22017683
>Not reading Don Quixote in its native language
lol

>>22018670
Fair enough. I've created a mega account and am currently uploading my entire project folder for free, including my unused recordings. I'll post a link when it's done.

>>22018670
>>22018732
All right, here's the link:
https://mega.nz/file/AZVVDT7b#-DCyJi5dArQ8qSVZ71lk979fklU4smn2fjxa7RXYS-k

The folder contains two Audacity projects: one for my performances alone, and another for everything else (i.e. the intro/outro and sound effects). I exported the first project to a single mp3 file, just to make adding everything else in the second file easier. I realize the project is kind of a mess, but as I said, I'm new to Audacity, so you'll have to forgive me.

>>22018670
>>22018764
If you'd like, you can re-record the intro/outro yourself, to include your own contributions in the credits. I've re-written a version of the intro/outro script for you below, if you'd like to do that.

> 4chan’s Literature Board Presents: “Oats: a play in eleven posts”
> By Anonymous
> Written March 2nd, 2021; thread number 17681829

> [audio drama]

> You’ve been listening to “Oats: a play in eleven posts.” Narrated by Anonymous (a different anonymous), recorded on May 10th, 2023, and uploaded in its current form on May 11th, 2023.
> The music at the beginning was the third movement of Asger Hamerik’s third symphony: the “Symphonie Lyrique,” performed by the Helsingborg Symphony Orchestra. The music playing now is the second movement of Heinrich Joseph Baermann’s Clarinet Concertino in C-minor: Opus 29, performed by the Prague Chamber Orchestra.
> This shitpost was made possible by the contributions of users like you. Thank you.

It might add to the effect if this intro/outro is recited by some other "actor," but it's up to you. Thanks again for doing this. Heck, maybe we should start another thread to post this when it's done, to celebrate.

>>22018776
>>22017095
We should make this radio-drama thing into a running trend:
> 4chan’s Literature Board Presents: “Short story based on photographic writing prompt”
> By Anonymous
> Written November 22nd, 2018; thread number 12124665, post number 12124717

> "NIGGERS could be here" he thought...

>>22017221
Someday, you will come across a full blown bigot and you will understand. It may lack the grunting, but the rest of it is there.

>>22018813
>spoiler
i'd listen to it.

>>22018318
The primary point is that the local rainfall qualifies it as a desert and that artificial irrigation is what enables use as an agricultural area. Next, you can tell me about how Goodyear, AZ does not qualify as a desert because it is also a drained swamp. Maybe you can clarify regarding that a lot of the farmland in Dalmatia is also reclaimed swampland since this all started based on the Diocletian meme. I don't know anything more than that he was growing cabbage when they approached him seeking leadership. Was he farming reclaimed swampland?

>>22018776
>you can re-record the intro/outro yourself
esl here, I would sound like shit
I won't edit your original file in terms of cuts and whatnot, the only thing I'll do is to even the levels and add studio fades here and there
btw, so far I have an overall structure for the video but it needs a shitload of work

>>22000442
Does anyone have the greentext of the 4channer talking to Lovecraft about reddit while Lovecraft asks if their Hibernian.

>>22019135
This hurts a little. Not only should we touch grass, but we should all - every one of us - grow something out of the ground just for the sake of witnessing nature unfold. Maybe not every day, maybe not all year long, but one should grow something to its complete state at least once per year.

>>22008770
Ara ara

>>22019195
Well thank you anon. I've recorded an alternate take of that outro for you below, but you don't have to add it in if you don't feel it.
https://voca.ro/13vqgUSt8WvV

The only part that needed to be changed was the outro's first sentence, to reflect the new upload date. I think you can keep the rest of the recordings as is.

>>22019195
By the way, what app are you using here? It doesn't look like you're doing this in Audacity yourself. Is there some other app that you'd recommend I use next time instead?

>>22019313
Ok well technically I changed the SECOND sentence. But it was the first line in the greentext above, so you get the idea.

>>22019313
too lazy, I've already spent about an hour leveling the old audio file
now it looks and sounds a tiny bit better
>>22019340
that's after effects, for the video

keep the tread alive, you fags

>>22019350
Ohhhh... right
Fuck. I should've known that. I use After Effects myself, for my YouTube channel. I just thought you were using a specific audio program, or something.
Anyhow, thanks again for fixing up the sound.

>>22013240

>>22019571
>>22019596
kek

but the rest of these navy blue screenshots is not funny

>>22013222
my grandpa speaks like this and it's a little infuriating, but you can't hate the guy because he's so cheerful and is genuinely trying to communicate

>>22019509
I think we'll probably start a new thread when the finished recording goes up to celebrate. Don't worry too much about it.

>>22019608
I knew the women on Tumblr could be retarded, but never did I expect the men to be stupid too

>>22019705
If a man uses Tumblr that's already quite revealing for his brightness

>>22015043
Reas the books how about that?

>>22010055
You're autistic. Get out of this board.

>>22015413
That book is great and terrible, and wholly under-read

>>22009802

>>22019596
literally me.

>>22000442
>>22019350
>>22019313
when the fuck did I even start this thread?
I remember making the bukoski meme, but not starting a thread I guess the alcohol is getting to me
this shit has come a long way
anyway, here's the video which I hope is not half as bad as I think it is
https://mega.nz/file/vccyjThL#Pnpf8Ap7yBOrUJKji0AIgiU-2SliPLRh4BTTcMPyC1M
as I said, I don't care what you do with it as long as you don't claim you made it
why the fuck did I wasted 8-12 hours on this shit when I'm one month behind on rent

>>22020150
This is fucking beautiful. I love your visuals, too.
Thanks for fixing my audio, anon. I'd love to stay in contact with you, and maybe collaborate with you on something else one of these days. But I'm not totally sure how to do that through this site. They delete it when you post your Discord around here, if memory serves me correctly.
Still, your video was lovely, and I hope we meet again.

>>22020150
Also, hold on... you also started this humor thread to begin with? You're the OP?
If so, then congratulations anon! This has been one of the most enjoyable /lit/ humor threads I've seen in a long time.
But seriously, if you have a Discord, I'd love to connect with you on there as well.
The mods may delete your username, but I have 4chanX, so I'll be able to see it. Plus, even if we never collaborate on anything else, you still seem like a cool person to know.

>>22020150
Haven't heard back from you yet, so fuck it. I'm kalkazar#3668.
Reach out to me, editanon. We may never collab, but I'd still love to get to know you better.

>>22020159
>They delete it when you post your Discord around here, if memory serves me correctly.
not anymore, this shithole has gone downhills
you can post porn and shitcord tags, because this board has no moderation
>>22020186
I guess so, but I only remember it as a dream because I was drunk
>>22020284
I just added you, I'm the guy with ms paint profile picture

>>22020303
Thanks man. I just reached out to you.

>>22020303
And you know what? Fuck it. This doesn't fit in with the rest of the stuff on my channel. But it's too good to not upload.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZHZBrpziy7A
I think I have a right to. It's my voice in there, after all. I'll start a new thread for it as well, so as not to derail the "humor thread" too much anymore

>>22020385
Started a new thread as well, for those who are interested: >>22020431

>>22009769
Dis nigga really thought he could reconcile dualism with the pineal gland

>>22013272
You can change the words slightly but I don't see it any different to kids than saying to make chicken eggs, the mommy and daddy chicken do a 'special cuddle' or the story of the virgin birth.

>>22013274
I didn't know there was lewisposting here!

Did /lit/ turn off?

>>22021460
Poor Ogre, he got duped into reading Ulysses.

>>22013220
I don't get it, can someone help me?

>>22021799
ressentiment

Dont fall for the oxbridge meme - I hate it here. Everyone is just a striver midwit (yes me too but I never had any illusions of genius), it doesnt help with careers now the elite go to standrews and durham instead, and the college system makes adults gossip like children. The libraries are shit, everyone has 105iq political views, and they dont bother buying any journals outside the most basic. The political scene is tragic; labour get blackout drunk on boxwine at every event, the lib dems are just cringe a-level debate club types and committee members have phsyical fights and do drugs at the tory events. Tourists make the city impossible on the weekends and a pint costs about £15.

And the food at my college is shit.

>>22021460
me in the pic btw

>>22021460
>real life schizo writes complete utter nonsense as a meme
>"lmao ur too dumb to understand his depeer themes"
>what deeper themes
>"idk they're there bro. trust me. you'd understand if you weren't dumb lmao"
Every time with pseuds

>>22019705
>>If a person uses tumblr and has dick for reproductive organ
>>He is absolitly a moron
>>He could have a dick, pistil or alien genetelia
>>But for me he will remain a case of female mammalia

>>22019631
>>22019630
>>22019629
>>22019624
>>22019614
>>22019608
>>22019604
>>22019596
>>22019592
>>22019587
>>22019579
>>22019571
go back

>>22013217
I don’t know why but this one had me in tears

>>22004261
wew

>>22008761
Gigachad

>>22023343
>contributes nothing but criticism

You are a spiritual jew and need to kys immediately

>>22024980
Lmao

>>22010502
This. But it's not funny.

>>22025072
The term ''humor'' is a broad band. Not all humor inspires laughter. It can even be sad or terrifying.

Bump

>>22008752
Was thinking about this image as I was reading the scene

>>22022236
I went to Oxford, and I literally can't express how much better my life has been since I attended Oxford. I went to a state school and gradually became the stereotypical moody, withdrawn sensitive type who both despises the quality of his immediate culture and feels a weird pride for having been raised in a sort of anti-intellectual and brutal environment. I was all set to take my Russell Group humanities BA and spend my life working as an anonymous, insecure wageslave forever thankful of being offered a job and forever too insecure to pursue my creative ambitions. The chip on my shoulder had become something of a wedge, and I felt too out of place regardless of my environment, too resentful and bitter to even attempt to make it in the artistic world. Then I finally applied for Oxford and got in to study an English MA, with reassurance that should I work hard enough a career in academia or within one of Oxford's affiliated companies would be almost guaranteed. I turned up as apprehensive as usual, and the first few days were spent regretting my decision and desperately feigning a cultured personality. But then I realized that the people there were just interesting and that the snobbery and exclusivity I had anticipated was just a myth borne out of my working class upbringing. I've since graduated, having spend the year dining in grand halls with groups of interesting people, dating several girls (one of whom, a petite Russian whose family traces back to the aristocracy, is now my fiancee). I work four days a week at a publishing company and earn £38k a year. I regularly meet up with friends from my college and visit Oxford for nights out and for meetings with my professors. The Martin Eden-esque novel I have been writing for two years has been selected for publication at a major British publishing house and, honestly, I could not have imagined a few years ago how great life could be. I come on /lit/ and see how pathetic you all are and just shake my head and chuckle. If I saw you guys on the street I would of course throw you a penny or discuss Bukowski or whatever "realist" writers you enjoy, but ultimately I would be able to tell within ten seconds if you're an Oxbridge grad and would dismiss you as a potential source of good company if you are not. I never thought I'd know what it was like to be objectively better than somebody else, for the value of my existence to be superior to the value of a stranger's, but now I do and I've never been happier. People are awed by power and prestige. All I need to do is mention the university I attended (if only for a year) and they immediately begin to hunch and look at their feet because they know they are in the presence of greatness.

>>22026118
https://www.oxfordstudent.com/2017/05/01/time-stop-asking-school-i-went/

I'm 19 years old.

I am handsome, smart, athletic and virile.

I have a novel that is in it's final editing stage, and a creative writing professor at my college has read the first draft and thinks it's saleable.

I have a girlfriend who is confident, articulate, playful and spontaneous.

I have a small group of interesting friends from different social and academic backgrounds, and I also have many other acquaintances who see me as a reliable source of humour and good company.

Both my parents are alive and in good health.

I have no regrets.

I have already experienced three existential crises, the latter of which was described as having the depth and profundity of a man twice my age.

I am a passionate lover, a sharp thinker, and a trader of witty repartee.

I am not self-pitying, meek or needlessly humble.

I will live a good life at your expense.

>>22026149
>I'm 19 years old.
>I have already experienced three existential crises

Lol lmao kek

>>22026149
k

>>22026416
it's a humour thread after all

>>22025072