/lit/ - Literature

Try to be more like Hitler today

>>21967440
I never shoot myself after getting millions killed, you sack of potatoes!

>>21967440
>Vegans softening their message to not offend the vegetarians
Did someone spike the søy?

>3 day weekend
>read Moby Dick until 3 in the morning
>want to keep a semi-decent schedule so I set my alarm for 9am and go to sleep
>9 am alarm rings
>have debate in my head on whether to hit snooze or get up.
>tired, groggy, and practically asleep.
>the first coherent argument that pops up is, in a old, barely literate sailor accent
>There be no whales to hunt on Friday
>go to sleep until 10am

>>21967480
thanks for wasting my life you fucking retard

>>21967436
baka baka

>>21967436

All hell and no heaven makes Schopenhauer a very dull boy.
All hell and no heaven makes Schopenhauer a very dull boy.
All hell and no heaven makes Schopenhauer a very dull boy.

My gf is less free spirited than I am and the pressure is on for an engagement. I do care for her, but I feel dread when imagining a future with her. The alternative would be living a vagabond lifestyle of traveling & partying, but is that even viable for a single American man in his 30s?

>>21967606
You aren't the main character. Your life is going to be boring by matters of degree no matter what, and life alone only gets worse with time. Marry her now and if you get too frustrated you can always take it out by smacking her around a bit.

German Idealism amir?

>>21967436
I'm very anxious everytime someone catches me off guard and I can spew lies out for no fucking reason when this happens. Today a woman who was ten years older than me started a conversation in the tramway because she recognized my jacket and noticed we were always in the same ram. At the end of the back and forth she asked what I did in life. I'm a fourth year masters student and I said I was a fifth year. What the fuck? She probably didn't even care, so why did I do this???

Today again a doctor asked if I had any kids and I said "No, well, I had a girlfriend I was with for five years and she had an abortion..." Fucking hell, yes I had a girlfriend but fuck no, she never aborted! What the fuck!! The guy was just asking about kids because he has a baby daughter and wanted to talk about her!!

Another time, actually it was five years ago but I can recall it with perfect clarity due to how bizarre this exchange was, my local butcher asks me what I do in life and I said I was a med student. At this point in time I was a biology student so why the fuck would I lie???

I'm so fucking dumb it's unimaginable.

So what to all Evola magic book posting? I havn't seen one of those in a while.

>>21967709
*happened

I want AI to replace millions of people and force them to starve to death

>>21967722
I want millions to force you to starve to death.
one less whiner

I’m sorry. I miss you. I wish that you missed me. I wish that you would change your mind and talk to me.

>>21967724
>I want millions t-ACK!

New word: Flumpy

A portmanteau of fat and plumpy.

Such as:

That ass is flumpy.

>what, you're not a whiny genocidal madman too?
>troooooooooooo-oon
No really. kys

AI monarchy, AI monarchy, AI monarchy. AIM, AIM, AIM.

>>21967726
Who are you talking to?

>>21967440
It’s kind of crazy that he never had a job.

>>21967606
It is, but you should be fully considerate of what you’re giving up. Have you tried just telling her you don’t want to marry just yet?

nearby library is having a book sale i'm attending that they do 2 times a year. it lasts all weekend but i only attend on sundays as on sunday as opposed to buying things individually they just let you buy paper bags for 3 dollars each and fill it with as much shit as you can, first come first serve on all the used cds dvds and books nobody else bought. last time i went in october i got over a hundred dvds that i haven't even watched the majority of still and it cost like 9 bucks. sometimes if i'm lucky i'll even find a video game, one time i found a copy of The Neverhood in the CD section which i especially wasn't expecting as that game's relatively obscure and physical copies tend to go for a decent amount of money online. i didn't get into reading until relatively recently so maybe this time i'll take a longer look at the actual books this time, maybe i'll find something nice.

YOU DONT BELONG TO A LOCAL CULTURE
YOU ARE A GLOBALIZED LIBERAL NETIZEN

>>21967804
please let me join a culture i'll be good

I'm not good enough for any woman

I think I liked complaining about no gf mlre than I like actually having a gf

>>21967804
JOKES ON YOU, I ATOMIZED MYSELF LONG AGO AND THIS IS THE LAST VESTIAGE OF CULTURE I HAVE AND ONCE I CUT IT OFF LIKE A LEPER DOES TO AN APPENDAGE YOU WILL NEVER FIND ME!!! I WILL BE TRUELY FREE!!!

>>21967606
>I have to live a life bur I actually just want to pretend I'm 20 forever :(
Wow such a hard decision

>>21967804
I don't think you want to fight my city on who they claim.

>>21967606
>, but is that even viable for a single American man in his 30s?
Yes, look around you. There are tons of women in their 30s who aren't married still living like they are in their 20s. I'm sure there are men in their 30s that are single still acting like they are still in their 20s too... But if your entering your 30s as a man and you don't have your shit together, I think its time you start doing that. Nothing is more pathetic than a 40+ year old man who doesn't have his shit together and still throws temper tantrums like a child.

>>21967816
*crunch crunch*
*smack smack*

a few years ago i saw the girl with the nicest fittest ass ever made in the tightest thinnest leggings ever made you could perfectly make out the musculature and a guy in a box truck did a full 180 to gawk at it while driving. i would cut off one of my fingers to look at her again for 10 seconds.

I'm conflicted on whether or not I should remove my journal entires on a woman who I was madly obsessed with. Makes me feel bad about myself seeing how absolutely mental I was for her.

I'm about to take the biggest shit of my life.

>>21968045
good luck anon

One of the regulars where I work passed away. I didn't even like the guy. Sad he's gone.

>>21967606
>>>/adv/

>>21967979
Kys coomer

>>21968096
how am i a coomer. because i saw an attractive woman? you don't read books and you're not addicted to pornography so what do you even have?

>>21967799
In that regard im literally Hitler

>>21967799
jobs are for poor people

>>21967788
Why?

>>21967606
If you want to have kids, and you have a reasonably attractive sane woman you don't hate who would be a good mother for your kids, seriously consider just having kids with her. Life gets boring and lonely fast as a 30+ bachelor, and for some guys (and women) it's hard to recover and get another relationship at all. If you have a ton of prospects and money, you're good looking and tall, etc., then maybe you can afford to dick around, but if you're a schlub and won the lottery with a girl out of your league who is actually stable and wife material, then at least know very well what you're doing before you pull that lever.

I would say it is not worth it for "partying and travelling" unless you're basically a retard who is easily amused. Nobody wants to be a "vagabond" at 35. Your health also goes to shit between 35-45 unless you start taking really good care of yourself. You are going to want a family and a purpose in life (read: your family), most likely.

>>21968106
I read books and I watch porn occasionally, but I don't go out of my way for a fucking female.

>>21968137
oh so you're a misogynist. warn me next time so i don't waste my time talking to you.

>>21968140
>ogles women and remembers their asses for years
>"i would cut off one of my fingers to look at her again for 10 seconds."
>"fuck you misogynist chud incel im a feminist ally #believewomen"
checks out

>>21968154
it's called being a decent fucking human being

>>21968096
>>21968137

>>21968117
I believe his parents were middle class and both of them died while he was fairly young. He was as a homeless bohemian artist for a while.

>>21968140
No, I just treat people equally.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y5oPZFDci80

>>21968043
Keep them. You won't not have done it by editing your journal. You simped, get over it. It's not like you killed a dude and wrote notes for the police and prosecution to find.

>>21968202
>I'm not a misogynist
>I am a misanthrope, you fucking retard
I love a twist.

>>21967436
women are morally obligated to touch my penis

>>21968374
this, but replace "touch my penis" with "be a loving and kind woman in my harem."

My name is Stanton Cree,
And died three years before.
I shot a man to steal his drink,
At least that is what they hung me for.
Now I'm cursed to walk the earth,
And challenge every night,
A man to match me drink for drink.
Or by the bullet die.

>>21968415
>practicing polygamy
disgusting, burn for your sins

>>21968344
Treating people equally and not putting anyone on pedestal is not misanthopy, I don't have positive feeling towards anyone but neither do I hate people.
Next time try not making assumptioms based on 1 or 2 posts and adding edgy labels to people.

>>21968428
I never said I'd marry any of them...

>>21968432
Unironically why I dislike women. Not hate, but I dislike them enough to now want to deal with them anymore.
>Woman: "We are equals."
>Treat them as equal
>Woman: "Wow, misogyny."
They don't want equality they just want special privileges but just call it something else and for some reason a lot of Men and society as a whole bought into it.

>>21968432
>no write posts I like
Why?

>>21968447
because it will become an unconcious habit irl and you will be making incorrect assumptioms about real people

>>21968494
Why would I care about your self image anon? Especially more than mine as anon? How would that schizo psycho shit even work lol

I have developed an overwhelming indifference after I allowed myself to accept how truly powerless I am, and what it really means to be doomed to die.

It feels like letting go of the steering wheel while a car is going at full speed, only to find out the steering wheel was just a prop and you were never in control at all. And all this time, all these years, I was so afraid that if I let go of it for a moment something horrible would happen, that it would be my fault that things got horrible because I took my eyes off the road for one second. The responsibility was crushing, the fear was exhausting, the road was long and dark.

My head will smash against a wall and my brains will be smeared, the car will catch on fire and my skin will melt, a passenger will slit my throat and watch me die. I can keep gripping this steering wheel.

Or I can close my eyes, listen to the radio.

100 miles per hour
gonna crash
gonna die
and I don't care

>>21968501
You shouldn't, you should care about making correct assumptions about people.

>>21968045
I popped a pimple and it spewed out like that once.

>>21967436
Do mods or jannies judge us for sitting here all day pouring our thoughts out, or just acting on base desires, or even ego?

>>21967788
Someone I love who hates me.

>>21968654
Post your butt hole

>>21968525
>you should
lol anon really thinks he's my mom

>>21968640
The only time I got warned for something I did and not an IP mix up was because I posted about butterfly. You have to be that retarded to get noticed on /lit/

My family got a puppy recently. It likes to shit in the bathrooms right in front of the toilet

I've been revisiting albums I listened a lot as a teenager. Jesus christ there's no good noise rock album, at least in that list. Why did I like that shit, I don't know. I swear I wasn't pretending to like it.

>>21968698
Thats okay. I liked Bob Dylan when I was a teenager. Thought he was deep. Totally embarassed now.

I wrote a fantasy book on Royal Road, but I'm not sure if it's any good.

The average person has one ovary and one testicle.

All of tv is basically softcore porn these days

I feel like my life has finally gone back to normal since the start of the pandemic upended everything.

Historians are like pimps who prostitute the past to the highest bidder.

>>21968858
How much for History to twist my nipples and call me a bitch?

Lost my job in March 2022 over vaccination. Haven't been employed since.

I don't know why but I find bri'ish history before the norman conquest a lot more interesting than I find it after the conquest.

Doctors are absolutely useless 90% of the time

The older I get the less patient I get with people, the more I find any social event a waste of time.

>>21968640
Sure, if you'd want to take those types of people seriously I suppose

I've been reading about this guy Paul Virilio. Interesting fellow.

Literature is, and always will be, out of the reach of the lower classes.
You would assume this is a monetary barrier, if books weren’t essentially free now.

Legitimacy cannot be bought.

>>21969127
Books aren't everything, nor is reading. I'd take a good man over an intelligent man, any day. Do not look down on your fellow man either, we're ultimately all in this together. To harm or to reject another is to reject a part of your self. We are all cells in the body of Humanity.

>>21967440
do you mean cutting one of my balls off?

My life is a mess atm

>>21969180
That has nothing to do with what I am saying.

and good men are intelligent, it is ignorance and stupidity which breeds hatred.

is google forgetting english?

>>21969309
google is designed just to prompt you with "most searched terms" so there are tons of people out there so retarded or distracted that they typed that instead of the proper word.

>>21969309
Grammar is fascist. Prescriptivism is authoritarianism. Down with the patriarchy. Viva la revolucion.

i want this person to read the entirety of infinite jest to me https://youtu.be/-QpJ8TG4XjU

The only right way to work now is to job hop every 1-3 years. I made a huge mistake by coming back to my college town and taking a job at the college and then staying in it for so long.

When is it enough? I have never been rejected by a girl (women usually initiate) and I think I'm reasonably attractive. Women like my demeanour and personality in general as well. However I just can't make the leap of faith. Even if I make the gestures to do so, with full enthusiasm in the moment, I return to just idleness and introspection. The woman I am dating now sometimes looks incredibly beautiful but sometimes, especially when she has no make up, I see her flaws. My eyes then turn to randoms who I would have no intention of truly having a relationship with. Will a more beautiful woman satisfy me?
I try to value personality, values and principles in a woman I'm looking to date but is that all just contrived?

>>21969786
You should value growing up retard

>tfw I wasnt selected worthy by any girl and ended up as a wizard

>>21969649
>another post by the college job whiner guy
lmao so lean into it and move up the food chain. get your higher ed management masters or whatever. overdress with a suit every day. put a bunch of dei shit in your email signature. go to every conference for higher ed bureaucracy in your region. it might be tempting to switch to the career you really wanted, but look around at all your coworkers who are making this their career. sure the pay probably maxes out around 120k but that's a fair lifestyle even in a big city. either that or fucking move the fuck on.

>>21969309
write "is we getting" into google and see the suggested results
trust me
>wwoym
God I want to read Titus Groan but my concentration is bad recently, I really enjoy that book but my executive function is bad. Yes I have adhd. I think I'll go read now after listening to a few songs

>>21969180
For a reader or writer, it’s everything. I know more than a few people who lament not growing up in a house with parents who did much reading, or encouraged much reading, or who went to colleges that didn’t really care if you read, or maybe even lived ins. Culture where reading was “gay”.

>>21969856
>my concentration is bad recently
review what you've eaten recently. food with artificial dyes is known to trigger adhd.

>>21968774
Same here. I made some bad choices right before that, which I only recognize in hindsight as bad choices, but starting with the pandemic everything really started to stagnate and get worse for me. It really up-ended plans and I never recovered during a really crucial period of my life where making progress was really important. I even found it difficult to write because I felt like the spark had been stomped out. It’s so hard to write about anything when life isn’t really occurring, or when life is just logging on for the day and then logging off every day.

I wish I had known at 24 how important the jobs I take and my career choices were. People literally see you as your work experience and the things you do in your 20s will matter for your “story” in your 30s and 40s.

>>21969867
don't let them rewrite history and act like the lockdowns didn't happen or "weren't that bad" or were actually "good". no that was some fascist shit. i will never see the government the same way.

>>21969871
same anon, same. I completely sabotaged my career at uni. never worked, never did any internships, never made any connections or switched into better field.

>>21969882
I mean, it started in uni for me but I actually had a brief chance to recover within a year or two after but I blew it by taking a bad job and then I got stuck there during lockdowns and still haven’t left. I’ve sort of aged out of having a good or worthwhile early career.

Should I sell my soul for 10 years as an investment banker so I can buy a plot of land and fuck off there until I die?

>>21969892
what was that job? I have a several years job gap and some shameful jobs that I dont even want to write on CV.

>>21969904
Bookkeeping at the community college I went to for a while

>>21969904
>>21969932
I was a management consultant before that…

>>21969932
>>21969942
they do seem like a decent jobs. was the pay not enough?

big dicks will rule the world

>>21969971
Management consulting was a good job and paid really, really well, like nearly software engineer salary but the work environment was hellish. Constant walking on egg shells, being on call 24/7, traveling, just being like a robot all day everyday. Bookkeeping at a community college is just not a good job. The pay is low. The benefits are mediocre. The people are intolerable. I took it because I was running, basically. I ran back home and to the places I grew up in instead of moving onward and upward. I wanted to get closer to the countryside since that couple of years in the city burned me out and that place was the closest to the countryside I had ever been. Once I got there I realized it was a mistake so I planned to only do it for a short while and by the time of the lockdowns I decided I wanted to be a writer. The job went remote so I could waste all my time reading and writing and so I stuck with it despite the very low pay, but I haven’t manage to have any success with writing and I’ve started to feel like I’ve aged out of that. In some respects I’ve been lucky but at the same time it’s not yielded the fruits I hoped it would. I’ve managed to save a small amount by living with a parent so that’s good at least but then again, I’m far too old to still be living with a parent. Sometimes I feel guilty for abandoning that money in the consulting job. If only I could’ve suffered through it I could’ve set my family up quite nicely, probably found a girl, had kids, etc.

>>21969871
>I wish I had known at 24 how important the jobs I take and my career choices were.
24 is pretty old already. A lot of people probably told you to do get in where the money's at and do internships. Not being judgeamental there but what were you doing and was it worth it?

>>21970006
Nobody told me shit. I grew up with a single mom who didn’t even know what I studied in college and had no relationship with my father after about 14. I had no older brothers, no older cousins, no mentors, nobody. I went to a very large state school so advisors and professors didn’t really take a personal interest. I’m the oldest of 5. The only male role mode type person in my life was very distant and died when I was 20. I had a step-dad for a while but I didn’t see him often and I thought he was a bit of clown. I really had nobody.

Listening to Parsifal and its doing things to me

>>21970023
>I really had nobody.
I have the same past as you. The understanding that no one is behind us should push you into going forward. Can you still go to college? It's hard but if your country's education is free you probably get back and aim for a higher position in life.

Incel here.
I'd like to imagine that I can be completely satsified with my life as a single, friendless, almost totally asocial dude who just quietly lives his life and studies what interests him, but I don't think I can make it work forever. I'd like to say that I'm some kind of ubermensch capable of rising above the petty biological urges of his flesh-chariot or some such nonsense.
The truth is that the urge to have kids gets stronger every single day, I'm so touch-starved that a girl simply sitting next to me on public transit instantly gives me a boner, and I every Valentine's Day I lie in bed with the lights off all day long and contemplate suicide.
I wish I could resolve the conflict with myself, either by actually meeting someone and developing a relationship, or by somehow putting an end to these urges, which so far have done nothing but cause me grief and heartache.
Lord, have mercy on me a sinner.

>>21970082
I have intense admiration for people in your situation who still didn't invent an alternate personality or fictional character to give them support in life. What keeps you going? I think I went insane two years ago.

>>21970078
Oh, I went to college. I struggled like hell, I got shitty grades, but I did manage to graduate and get my degree before I turned 25. It wasn’t free, but I managed to pay off most of my debt by living with my mother for a while. I mean, I definitely wish I had done things differently in my college years but I don’t regret those so much as I regret my subsequent working years.

>>21970082
It is definitely possible for you to form male friendships at least. I think romantic relationships are always a possibility but you seem to have fully accepted that they’re not for you and I know you’d argue it with me if I said so.

I find the internet addicting because of this ever present sense that insight, revelation, a key piece of information that makes it all make sense is just around the corner. One more thread, one more page, one more click away.

It's like a slot machine where the prize is meaning, but there is no jackpot, not uncovering of a greater truth, just another tantalizing roll of the dice.

>>21970104
I wouldn't say that they're not for me - I don't totally discount the possibility of meeting the right person some day - but making that kind of relationship would very much be an uphill battle for me. I have quite a lot of baggage and personal issues - grave sins that weigh on me, attitudes and habits formed by years of living in a rut, problems that have no clear solution - and I think my chances of meeting a girl who would both put up with all of them and see something in me worth doing that for are very slim. In addition, I refuse to bend my values in order to make relationships, and I don't go to bars or clubs or use dating apps, so the total number of social situations per year in which I might meet someone is very low.
>>21970091
I did feel tempted to try and "become a Chad" or put on a persona in order to change things, but I don't think my values are compatible with that kind of thing. I'd rather be completely genuine and honest, even blunt, with people than endlessly try to anticipate what sort of personality they would want to interact with the most. Plus, even if I did get close to someone that way, either they would catch me off guard and discover the truth - that I'm an incredibly boring guy with fairly alien values and interests compared to whatever they had imagined based off any alpha Chad grindset persona I'd put on - or I would become exhausted due to the constant active effort to act like another person and give it up, which would have the same result. Being honest with myself and others is the best policy.
I can't say I haven't lost my mind a little, and I certainly have had times when I wanted to give up on life, but I'm motivated to continue by a strong urge to understand and experience philosophical truth as far as my intellect is able to receive, and by the knowledge that if I don't carry my various crosses to the end I will never be free from slavery to the world and to sin. To put it another way, I am guaranteed to suffer, but I can either let my suffering end me or I can try to find meaning in suffering.

I just shit myself an hour ago just before i was heading out for a ciggie. Walked into the bathroom, took a proper shit and a shower and washed my boxers. That wasn't that much out of the ordinary as this is semi annual occurance(propably related to the feast of mangoes i had yesterday). What was and has been out of the ordinary is my reaction towards the incidence. I tend to overreact to every single adversity i face, be it small or great and have a hard time coming up with things going wrong that i can deal with in a smooth manner. There is one exception. When i shit myself it's like the spirit of Buddha overtakes me, and my inner voice turns calmer than bob ross. Despite having liquid fart in my pants it feels as if I have all the time in the world to walk to the bathroom. I find this disparity stupidly fun and confusing so i chuckled to myself for the whole 15 minute shower. My day got better and i didn't end up shitting myself in public. I did aquire some trust issues when it comes to farts. Still got some mangoes left. Life is good.

>>21970273
> I did aquire some trust issues when it comes to farts. Still got some mangoes left. Life is good.
I had a good hearty chuckle thanks anon

Normal condoms are too loose for me.
Why live

>>21969225
Kinda sorta, people tend to uphold intellect as a virtue, which I can see why but it also implicitly implies that if you aren't smart you are bad. Which isn't true either, I don't see the point at holding up our noses at people who don't read
>>21969857
Yeah, grass is greener syndrome is real. Books are an amazing technology but you do not let yourself be absorbed by them. They aren't as pernicious as pornography or video games but they can be a way to waste time when you could be doing something more productive. Unless its a book that imparts a skill.
>>21969846
It's okay Anon, I'm 32 and I had a couple girls pick me and I turned them down and became a wizard anyway. If it makes you feel better the Millennial generation entered their 30s with almost half of the women in our generation never having a kid. The lowest rate of reproduction in America's Generational history. Another interesting thing is the sharp incline of women taking some sort of anti-depressant or mood stabilizing drug. 8 Million women between the ages of 30+ are medicated, highest rate in American history and some people are are speculating the three major factors are: women in the workforce (less time and need to find a husband), Social media (Theres a lot of research of how social media fries your brain, women use social media the most out of the two genders), and hook up culture (too many one night stands destroys your oxytocin regions which impairs the ability for women to feel attached to who they have had sex with after.)
Sure us men have it bad, but women are hitting 30 and literally exploding, stay strong and keep your chin up. I'd advise against dating or marrying at all but if your brave enough you'll find someone.

>>21970363
I just want a fellow witch to be awkward together. I know it's extremely rare but I have nothing to lose at this point.

All the blacked/bbc posting on this site has made me want to fuck black women as retribution against it.

>>21967804
Gee, thanks doc!

>>21970363
>Another interesting thing is the sharp incline of women taking some sort of anti-depressant or mood stabilizing drug. 8 Million women between the ages of 30+ are medicated, hi
You're thinking about this backward. Those women got medicated about the time they should be having a sexual awakening, while also being fed a cultural line that a sexual awakening should not involve finding a partner or kids because they also need drugs to decouple sex and childbirth... the drugs to make them infertile during that sexual awakening also make them less attractive to men, more likely to choose partners who are more genetically similar, and mask a variety of hormonal imbalances which go untreated.
The resulting interruption of the normal late teenage process of mating means that they become dissatisfied and depressed. And then this is compounded by the fact if they do find someone to mate with, they were probably attracted to that partner while on hormones and they might well have zero natural attraction to that person, which will become evident once they are no longer pregnant nor on hormones. That's where you're getting men trying to have affairs with the reasoning their wife is no longer interested in sex while the men are still in their thirties.

Everyone I know is useless or pretending not to be. I'm almost useful, but I'm always missing something. I used to intentionally put myself in bad situations because I would learn something interesting afterward. I'm sure the same will happen here.

>>21968706
He did win a noble prize though..
Btw I never listened to him nor do I plan to do so in the future

>>21968906
That's bretty cool Anon! ^w^ I think a person like you standing their ground despite everything is really inspiring!

>>21967436
Do I like prostitutes because they are honest women or just because they are sexualized?

>>21970363
Well reading books always impart a skill. Suppose you are a writer. You’re at a serious advantage if you didn’t start reading widely or deeply until you’re thirty-five.

>>21970268
I think you may or may not be right, but it’s moot if you’re this hard on yourself about it. A person might be unlovable, but they’ll never actually know for sure if they always insist they’re unlovable and never allow themselves to be loved. Get what I’m saying?

>>21970212
Same here. The phone is the worst. I think I’m going to switch to a dumb phone. If I had a lot of money, I’d buy a small farm in rural Pennsylvania and spend my days farming and writing poems.

>>21967440
Have my personal doctor (whose smell was described as unbearable by his allied captors) inject me with methamphetamine, oxycodone and testosterone to increase muh vitality?

>>21969871
No, there is garbage even in tech fields and even in medical tech. How many people work on spytechshitthousand or buythischinkcrapsite compared to people that work on fusion reactors and anti aging technology?
So we keep suffering and dying.
I hate humanity so much it's unreal.

>>21969867
Yeah I faced a very similar stagnation. It wasmt all bad desu. Did some interesting things but I definitely feel stunted overall

>>21969871
Well I'm 24 now. Thanks for the advice.

To study philosophy is to confront the fundamental questions that run through the history and current events of humanity. It confronts the universalities of the human experience that transcend class, race, sex, ideology and identity. What is good and evil? What is life and death? Who are we? Why are we here? What is knowledge and truth? What is art and beauty? What is being? Man and his destiny? These questions are not reserved for a certain class or lone point in time. They concern all human beings, whatever their age, culture or situation. They are universal and timeless. Philosophy is the heritage of humanity confronting these issues, investigating these questions, and what they have learned from doing so. Studying philosophy means engaging in dialogue with the great thinkers and leaders who have marked Western and world culture. In my opinion, philosophy is a necessity and requirement for self actualization and transcendence.

if any of you believe in prayer please pray for a little pigeon with a limp who flew away before my friend could help her

>>21970581
Some people hate pigeons. They seem a bit uncoordinated sometimes but endearing too.

>>21970543
All smartphone users, especially you, are faggots.

Smartphoner, a viewer of tiktok
Your only hobby, chugging cum,
and sucking cock.

You wish you could start anew,
To have your time better spent-
But it's no use, now you're only good for getting bent.

You will never change.
You will never get better.
Day to day, you're only growing fatter.
You are forever encaged.

>>21970594
>They seem a bit uncoordinated sometimes but endearing too.
Literally me

I am 25, and I am a semi-serious christian. I say semi, because while I truly believe, I still act like a sinner. Why is that? I do not believe that I am naive. I am just scared of two things: death, and lack of meaning. I can not be a nihilist, because it seems to be the most empty thing to be. It's just sad to think that us being here in the universe, is just a meaningless coincidence. Also that death is just a return to nothing. Against my will I have been given this miserable life, and this entire pointless existence will lead up to nothing - just darkness. It's cruel and pointless. I desire to have meaning in my life. I need it. I can not properly function without a greater meaning. I need something to believe in. Even though I fear both heaven and hell, I fear the idea of nothingness even more. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night, and cry because I am reminded that life ends. I hate my parents so much for having me. Their selfish desire to have a third child, has brought me nothing but misery (a fact that I never fail to remind them).

All I do is think all the time. About politics, about metaphysics, about religion, about science. I’m so depressed. Life is just unanswerable, there’s non justification you can give for it. And the pursuit of truth is so fruitless because our minds are too weak. I wish I could stop thinking and be content.

>>21970658
are you a christian out of fear of death only?

>>21970661
I have been on this path for the past few years as well. It's slowly turning me into some sort of weird liberal fascist transhumanist travesty and turned me into a cranky asshole as well, but also gives me confidence.
I like to provoke people with pseudophilosophical questions and take contrarian positions in cases where I even agree with the person on that specific topic or issue.
It's getting ridiculous.

>>21970667
I was born into an Orthodox christian family and I have gone to church my whole life. Once I became an adult, some of my stances chanced. Many left religion behind as they became adults, while I remained.

Language technology, such as language models like ChatGPT, is catalyzing a narrative singularity.

Language is the true ultimate power and the source of our technological and social ability.

I want to write CYOA dumb gay fantasy erotica where people vote in polls for what happens next, but I don't know here to post the polls for anyone who would care. Hard to get started when you have no one to play along with the CYOA aspect.

>>21970778
Twitter

I don't get economy and currencies

why are some currencies bigger numbers than other currencies but apparently is still stronger than other currencies with smaller numbers
like Japan and Taiwan

JPY have bigger numbers than TWD since 10000yen is like around 2200twd

but apparently yen is stronger than ntd?
I know inflation or something make numbers go big, but if the economy is recovering does the number of the currency never go back down?

>>21970877
For numbers to go down you need deflation, if inflation is reducing but still exists that just means rate of inflation is slowing down.

>>21970890
so the numerical value of a currency doesn't directly translate to the strength of a currency?

like south korean won is big ass numbers but their currency is strong?

I'm studying the philosophy of technology, but some of this criticism of technology controlling how much we think seems like a self-fulfilling prophecy of because you think technology controls your thoughts it thus does control your thoughts because the philosopher is reacting to this idea of technology, so indirectly they're actually being controlled by technology because they already think they are. Am I making sense?

>>21970821
I guess, but besides using hashtags which one one even uses or checks, I'm not sure how to get noticed.

>>21970901
Money really is just fake shit and strength of money (or more directly speaking of central banking or any fractional reserve banking) comes down to faith in said money and state/society it is used in and system as a whole.
If people just all decided that x currency is fake and gay and wanted to withdraw it to exchange it into other currency, gold or whatever else then the said currency would collapse, naturally.
I'm not an economist, so I might be missing some things, but this is the general gist.
It would get more complicated if you started to compare currencies, because then I imagine you would need to look into trade balance of country (or economic union) that uses that specific currency, into its exports and imports, and so on.
Some countries inertially devalue their currencies so their export goods are cheaper for other countries, and then there is petrodollar system.

>>21970940
>inertially
*intentionally

>>21970877
It's not the numbers by themselves that make a currency strong, but the ratio that number maintains in comparison to other numbers.
If 1 bloobloo coin is worth one apple, and stays worth one apple for a long time, regardless of the country next door charging 2 huehue coins one year for the same apple and then 4 huehue coins for it the next and then 6 huehue coins the next year, the bloo bloo coin economy is stronger because it resists changes in the apple market, and the huehue coin economy is suffering inflation (because the price went up internally). In the second year the huehue coin went through 100% inflation, so now you need twice as much huehue coin to buy the same thing. In the third year, the huehue coin only had 50% inflation, so the economy got stronger than when it had 100% inflation, but the price still goes up by 50%.
If you're asking this because people are saying inflation is going down but you're still seeing prices rising, it's because they mean prices are not rising as fast as it would be with a higher inflation rate. If the huehue coin continued to have 100% inflation in the third year, instead of 50%, it would cost you 8 huehue coins to buy the apple (4 hue hue coins + 100% inflation= 4 coins+ 4 coins), but it only went up by 50%, so it costs you 6 coins (4 huehue coins + 50% inflation= 4 coins + 2 coins for the inflation)
Economies can be stronger by other metrics than currency, because countries can devalue and inflate the value of the economy. In the 100% inflation year for huehue coins, the government minted another coin for every coin that was already in circulation, while the bloo bloo coin government printed no new coins.
This is a very simplified version which doesn't take into account most elements involved in the process but I hope it helps.

>>21970541
Maybe I came off sounding like I was calling myself unloveable when I didn't mean to. I'm just being realistic - society in my country being what it is and me being who I am, I will probably struggle to find someone or never do so at all. I don't intend to sound defeatist.

>>21970948
so basically high denominations in a currency are signs of a volatile economy and past or present economical problems?

>>21970920
Possibly, but I think Heidegger got over this by considering how it is we consider technology. That’s in the Question Concerning Technology. Actually Ted K did too. That’s in his essays on Progress and Liberty.

>>21970959
Not him, and I'm not quite sure, but you probably do want some currency and inflation to account for growth (more goods and services), but on the other hand, countries (central banks) can reduce balance sheets. Like for example, interest rate hikes mean loans for banks come with the higher interest so the loans people and businesses take from the banks will also have higher interest. So you don't reduce number of money in circulation, but you sort of reduce demand for it and reduce inflation (or rather, make shit more expensive and hope that people consume less thus cooling the inflation off).
That's how I understand it.

There’s bile in my throat that won’t go away and a sinking feeling in my stomach. I hat the impending feeling of doom. And in the afternoon, I had lain flat on my back and stared at the ceiling and just felt so empty, so, so fucking empty. And I really don’t care about the feelings. I just want to do more.
Maybe i should just go home. The sea sucked a good portion of my fear.

>>21970661
I think you might benefit from reading poetry. There’s a lot of thought involved but the truth essence of poetry is more along the lines of pure observation and appreciation.

>>21970608
Jokes on you. I don’t watch TikToks.

>>21970959
Not necessarily. Some governments just chose to print in different numbers. Not all currencies were necessarily decimal even. The old British system meant you could could charge someone 1 shilling and they could give you 12 pennies. In a lot of old books you'll see someone change "pounds" to "guineas" to indicate they're willing to pay more, because a guinea was one pound and one shilling.
In Korea the economy grew. It's now able to buy about 4000% more apples off everyone else. So, they could print more notes in the original low denomination notes, or they could just print higher amounts. Imagine you have 10 coins to buy an apple, and the economy grows a lot so now the government had printed 4000 more coins to give to you to make your 10 coins increase with the economy. You'll probably need a large bag and muscles to carry your 4010 coins to get that apple. What Korea chose to do instead was print coins that said 4000 on them instead of 10. 50000 won notes exist because telling people to just use five 10000 won notes instead- it wouldn't work like if banks refused to give you your cash in anything higher than a $5 bill when you asked to take $500 out. So in Korea's case, it's a sign of their market strength and growth.

>>21970994
>>21970959
Also, keep in mind that central banks (like the FED) seem to talk always that a moderate inflation (like 2%) is good for the economy. Idea being is that people consume and get loans and business produce. Which is all nice, but this system seems to buckle if population shrinks, it would seem. If you keep printing more money, even at a slow rate, but if population shrinks and number of goods and services shrinks, growth shrinks, then currency loses value.

>>21971011
I should make it clear I'm saying Korea metaphorically chose to "print coins that said 4000 on them". What they actually did was print higher denomination notes.

I'm going to jerk off just to feel alive. I don't really want to do it. Nor am I horny.

I miss being a real person out in the world.
IM SUPPOSED TO BE GRATEFUL. I AM SUPPOSED TO BE THANKFUL

>>21971020
Did it. Now I can sleep

>>21971011
>Not necessarily. Some governments just chose to print in different numbers
Not him, but I wonder what logic, if any, is there behind specific denomination numbers.
For example, China seems to have 100 yuan as their highest denomination banknote, while European Union has 500, although they seem to want to phase that one out due to financial crime and leave 200 as the highest. But then, why 200 and not 100? China seems to have larger economy GDP wise, their currency is somewhat weaker, partially at least intentionally to make their exports cheaper and more attractive.

>>21970464
>I used to intentionally put myself in bad situations because I would learn something interesting afterward.
Based fellow risktaker. Last time I felt alive was when I tossed a coin and decided I would leave everything behind to study abroad. Kind of miss the feeling of that foolish confidence. I've worked so hard to have a stable life that I'm bored now. I certainly would have fun doing stupid shit again that gets me in trouble but then I would have to deal with the consequences as an adult, and that sucks.

>>21971083
wash your dick

I have this long, extended story I've been writing since 2020. I feel compelled to write it; driven to write it. Like it's my mission from God to write it. I'm multiple books in now.

My friend who reads it swears I'm a genius, but I can't manage to get the first book published. It's very distressing. I am thinking of serializing it on my blog and promoting it via social media. I have a decent-sized following on a number of the apps.

One day
the day will come
when the day won't come

>>21971097
It's different for every currency because there are different cultural concerns in each country. Some places, like Japan, carrying less than a couple hundred dollars worth of yen is weird, giving bent notes is rude, so wallets are usually the length and width of the bills, and it's not strange for people to carry even more because that might not get you through a night out. A wad of cash isn't going to make a Japanese person nervous like it would an American, and an American is not going to be insulted by being given two crumpled $100 bills instead of five crisp $20 dollar bills like a Japanese person would.

>>21971222
If you're writing SF, Royalroad is your friend

>>21971273
Has anybody ever made the jump from Royalroad to traditional publishing? Eventually I'd like to grow my efforts into physical books, too.

>>21971222
>I am thinking of serializing it on my blog and promoting it via social media
can you stop being disabled for one goddam minute of your life?
you have a multiple book series on your hands right now with a sizeable following. do not waste this opportunity, anon. first things first, read every book at least 3 times and hammer out those edits. then get an editor (consider this an investment) to do a 'final' look over your work. consider their feedback carefully before doing your own final pass through each and every book (sometimes the editing hand gets too strong). then try and get it traditionally published. if you get rejected, consider their feedback carefully and incorperate it before triyng again. if you decide against traditional publishing or get sick of getting rejected then go the self publishing route which is much, much harder.
>you decide to self publish
get someone to design the cover. make sure you write a compelling blurb and throw it on the back, maybe hire a formatter. get some book reviews to throw on the back and maybe some endoresments from a few authors if you can. advertise this to your followers and encourage them to buy your books. DO NOT GET LAZY WITH THE ADVERTISEMENTS.
>your books have covers, blurbs, reviews, and are fully completed.
one of my favorite sayings is, "if all the t's are crossed, and the i's dotted, then you know it's ready" ensure that you are completetly ready for the launch of your books before continuing.
>you're completely ready
once you get here, your books are done, now you need to get them in stores. do not just publish a pdf of your books on amazon. you want your books in stores right? you want audiobooks right? use a print-on-demand company like ingram spark or whatever to get some copies of your book. (personally, i like creme paper) they'll send you author copies and you can do a final check for errors and hand them out to friends and family. once that's all said and done, contact local bookstores, see if they'll take it. then publish on amazon and friends physically and digitally. then find someone to do an audio book. sell that too. do nothing for free.
>all is said and done
great job annon. you wrote the books. you did something that only about 3% of authors ever do, and far less ordinary people will ever consider. now you can brag at parties and get all the handjobs and blowjobs you'll ever want.

>>21971296
Yes. Jumping ship is easy to do as long as you publish regularly. Creating a patreon account is an option, too.
I think there is a post on RR titled "How to write a novel like Paranoid Mage". The OP advice is shit but the people commenting on the thread have sound advices to quickstart your readerbase and get paid. That would sum up everything you need to know.

>>21970661
Theres a wojak for this but I cant find it

>>21971310
Traditional publishing isn't worth shit anymore. I know authors who make $9k a month by publishing their serials on the internet and releasing kindle ebooks when it gets popular enough. Ever heard of RinoZ?

>>21971222
What is it about?

>>21971337
>Ever heard of RinoZ?
RinoZ is an interesting character. Haven't heard of him until now, but I'm not surprised someone like him exists. physical books may very well be on the out, and 9k a month on digital alone seems plausable.
>Traditional publishing isn't worth shit anymore.
I assume by this you mean actual traditional publishing and 'physical self publishing' as in going to ingram spark and physically printing books to try and get your books in brick and mortar stores and shipped by amazon and the like.
i'm a sentimental type and I would like to get my work physically in the hands of my readers, but the anon i responded to should be aware of your suggestion, too. his choice for his books, after all.
>>I know authors who make $9k a month by publishing their serials on the internet and releasing kindle ebooks when it gets popular enough.
and continuing, I think RR (and those like it) is a great route for this which was suggested earlier to him. but it is an easy trap to fall into. a writer can end up writing bland fanfiction level work over and over and never getting anywhere. no followers and nothing to show. same can happen with traditional publishing and self publishing, too, but at least you get to hold a copy of your failure of a book. that is why I suggested what I suggested, but in this new age of short attention spans, anon may very well have an easier time with your route. instant gratification and all. personally, i'll always try and get my books digtially, audio-ly (?) and physically to my readers. just an ego thing, i guess.

>>21971368
Well, >>21971273 is going to be happy, because it's science fiction. Rather soft sci-fi, though; not a lot of technical details, but more fantastical and otherworldly. Set in the far future, a world filled with lots of strange things.

It's also a very Christian story, a Catholic story, subtly so at first but becoming more overt later on. It makes heavy use of metaphysical and theological concepts; these getting put into practice are how some of my characters are able to do the fantastical things they do. It's actually a very character-driven story, in general, despite its high concepts; I've tried to depict my characters inside and out, and the story is largely a journey at this point, all of them wandering this strange far future world and encountering strange things, all the while there is slow motion towards a grand climax, and the salvation of their souls hangs in the balance.

It gets violent at times, too, and there's even sexual content. Sometimes it's ugly, sometimes it's beautiful, and I try to depict both of those to the fullest extent. So it's "Christian sci-fi," but it's less A Canticle For Leibowitz and more Book Of The New Sun.

It's a lot of fun to write. I feel like I could write these characters and their journey the rest of my life. But I do have an ending in mind, though it will take a while to get there.

>>21971416
Okay, but what is it about?

I really regret how I spent my life. I’m not even sure how to recover anymore.

HAHAHAHA I JUST IMAGINED BEING A WOMAN OR A MINORITY BUT STILL WITH MY SAME MIND, JUST TECHNICALLY A WOMAN/MINORITY, AND I IMAGINED SEEING "CELEBRATING WOMEN/MINORITIES IN X" WHERE X IS A THING I WANT TO DO, AND THINKING "WOW.... SO BRAVE... THE FIRST (THING THAT I AM) TO DO X..."

AHAH AHAHAHAHAHA IMAGINE BEING ONE OF THESE FUCKING RETARDS LMFAO

LITERALLY "WOW, A (THING THAT'S LIKE ME IN A WAY) WAS AN ASTRONAUT... I WANT TO BE AN ASTRONAUT, THAT'S INSPIRING!" INSTEAD OF JUST "WOW ASTRONAUTS ARE COOL"

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT FUCKING WEAK LOSERS

>>21971481
can always start again


>>>/fit/

This is why and how advanced language-models will revolutionize education, and thus the world.

>the user's enhanced self-awareness and understanding of reality would be genuine, as they would be engaging in a process of self-discovery and reflection facilitated by their interactions with the language model. This personal growth could have far-reaching implications, potentially leading to greater empathy, better decision-making, and a deeper appreciation of the complexity and interconnectedness of the world.

l hate my past self so much for all the wasted chances and pathetic actions

>>21971640
This is why Christianity is a mistake.

>Flagellants are practitioners of a form of mortification of the flesh by whipping their skin with various instruments of penance. Many Christian confraternities of penitents have flagellants, who beat themselves, both in the privacy of their dwellings and in public processions, in order to repent of sins and share in the Passion of Jesus.

"Kek"

>>21971657
what?

>>21971495
Kek. They don't actually think that shit, anon, they're not that retarded. The people who are responsible for making this behavior popular are celebrities, whose image are to be protected at all cost. Ever went on LinkedIn? Most people here act like sycophants and only comment under inane shitposts that are socially acceptable. They're not doing it because they agree with that thing, they just want to gaslight people into thinking they do! Posting a dead woman scientist photo on LinkedIn is brave and Amazing, because she was a woman! They didn't give a shit about her work and they won't ever care about it. Actually no one gives a shit and people won't resent you for not knowing! They'll like the post because they want someone to think 'wow, that person is liking feminist posts on public social media, that must mean this person is progressive and a feminist' when visiting their profile.

It's all about image on social media and nothing more. A minority of a minority (very stupid people among the xxx category) is gaslighted into thinking like this but the vast majority knows it's bollocks and just virtue signalling. Among celebrities, just try to count who is both actively fighting for something and donating money (that they have plenty of) for it. Compare that number with those who just tweet they are in support of xxx. Nothing they do is real. You gave me a good chuckle but you're being gaslighted.

>>21971710
i thought linkedin was just a resume website? don't tell me it's some kind of social network for wageslaves now? fuck normies get more and more pathetic every time i hear something new about them

>>21971715
>don't tell me it's some kind of social network for wageslaves now?
It's exactly that. I've unfollowed about 20 people last time I went on it because these brown-nosers were filling my feed with anti-fatshaming and women's day posts. Some of them I knew admitted to hating women IRL. Even basedbros are touched by this corruption.

>>21967436
A few months ago I created my own pantheon of gods, with two principle deities. then my manic episode ended, and for a while I forgot about it, but recently I've started genuinely revering Pythagoras and his wife Theano as instantiations of these two gods, and I printed a picture of pythagoras and I wrote a bunch of quotes all around the margins and I stare at this picture. I am not in a manic episode, precisely the opposite, but for some reason I find myself reviving this shit

>>21971762
Schizophrenia

>>21971504
You can’t though, not really. You can always write a better chapter 2, sure. But it always comes after chapter 1. You can never write chapter 1 over or edit it.

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGaKVLFNWzs
i generally find four tet kinda mid and overall overrated but the new single goes hard af ngl

I’ve gained like 10lbs in the 3 months that I’ve been on Lexapro. I feel incredibly self-conscious and uncomfortable, which makes me not want to go outside, which means I’m totally sedentary and that just contributes to the problem. Lexapro makes me marginally less anxious in general, but only in the sense that I don’t really give a fuck about anything, meaning that I’ve been making all sorts of bad decisions—financial and otherwise—that my anxiety would normally give me a healthy fear of. And it doesn’t stop me from having those episodes where I become incredibly agitated and frantic and can’t stop crying and feel like I’m losing control. Sometimes they last for multiple days. I’m drowsy and lethargic all the time, and when I wake up and take my medication in the mornings I feel so sleepy afterwards that I just go back to bed. Then at night I can’t sleep, and I lie awake for hours. My doctor suggested putting me on Remeron to help regulate my sleep schedule, but I refused it because I read that it’s known to cause rapid weight gain. She switched me to Effexor instead, so I’m starting that on Monday.

I don’t think that any combination of pills can fix whatever’s wrong with me. Counseling hasn’t helped either—I’m so tired of rehashing my childhood and explaining how fucked up my life is. I don’t enjoy being alive anymore. It’s not even just that I don’t enjoy it though, it’s that either I’m empty or I’m consumed by unbearably painful emotions—this desperate starved feeling of loss that can’t be soothed because he’ll never relent. I’m not even living—I’m just passively existing in a state of total misery and isolation, withering on the vine.

At least when I was obsessing over him I had something to focus on that gave me drive and occupied my thoughts, even if he caused me so much emotional pain that I couldn’t cope. Otherwise it’s like there’s just nothing. Anyway, I still feel so fucked up about it all: the sadness and shame, the complete emptiness, never really goes away. I try to think back to the things that occupied my thoughts before I met him. I can’t even remember what I used to think about and feel interested in. I think that I’ve forgotten how to be my old self, not that I was particularly happy before anyway. But I was bearably sad then. Now everything is unbearable.

At least before November I could get a little bit of satisfaction or comfort from the fantasy of closeness. Now the fantasy just makes me feel sick and crazed with pain, like it’s taunting me for being fucking delusional and pathetic, because I know how much he hates me. I wish that I could stop wanting him. I don’t think that I ever will. I wish that I could just switch off my brain and rest forever.

>>21972438
Get a DBT group, stalkerchan

The last book i completed was "the e-myth revisited" because i cant think of anything but work. Trying to concentrate on a difficult work of fiction or philosophy was hard enough before i started working, but Now i dont even try.

How do i stop caring about work? Also, how do i improve sleep habits? I only get 5-7 hours a night

I was always a little resentful that I had to work full-time in college. I would wonder why my grades were so bad and if I was just stupid, and then I’d realize that I have a 10 hour shift until 3 am while everyone else was in class or at office hours.

>>21967436
I wish I could desire things again. I can’t focus on a book or a movie for over two years now. I can’t get it up anymore. It’s becoming painful to put on a fake smile for friends/family/society. My only desire now is to not wake up again. I’m so terrified.

My will to create is being crushed by the need to work. I have credit debt that I shouldn’t have that went to pay for other people’s medical bills and “emergency” plane trips for family. I live a simple bug life otherwise but this economy and these rate hikes are soul crushing.

Can't trust chicks with having "big boobs" anymore. Some of them are so good at giving that illusion.
Wear a tight bright shirt, preferably white. Wear a slightly oversized bra. It'll make their boobs at the very least 2 times bigger than they actually are.

>>21972562
Sometimes you have to go back to the origin. If you can’t find something new to light the spark, return to something old.

I miss my ex girlfriend even though we broke up 2 years ago. I met another ex boyfriend of hers the other night and now I can't stop thinking about her. I wish you could just undo past mistakes but you can't and that is what makes life life.

>>21972714
lol

>>21972707
Nostalgia is not working anon. I really tried to go on a nostalgia trip. I tried reading books and watching movies my younger self loved. Sometimes it makes me cry knowing how much I used to love it and how I don’t anymore. It really doesn’t work anymore.

I need divine motivation.

>>21972009
My favorite Four Tet song is Slow Jam. It's actually the song that got me into remixing (which I'm bad at).

>>21972754
You need to make or do something. You have breathed in for too long, no more room. Try breathing out. It's a different experience and it makes room for breathing in again.

>>21972861
>make or do something
Any suggestions? I can’t really focus on things anymore. I don’t have anything to say. “I want to die” isn’t all that interesting.

>>21967436
Girl is 19 and says she has slept with 10 different guys. How bad is this?

>>21968162
you know? being decent kind of sucks. most people are shit and act like it too.

>>21972873
pretty bad

>>21972873
Pretty bad, but also depressingly common, or even below average when it comes to body count. The number of girls who are in the triple digits is likely much higher than reported.

>>21972872
Abandon being interesting or interested, on having something meaningful to say or not, on caring or not caring. Give yourself over to a process. The voices in your head, whatever they say, positive or negative, don't matter. How you feel about yourself, positive or negative is irrelevant. Give yourself over to a process, to action, to movement, to doing. Become machinic in your production. Quality doesn't matter. Center yourself in your body, your limbs, and fingers, your brain is just a parasite attached to your body, your mind, your thoughts, are just secretions of this parasite. Good or bad, its just brain slime from the ass of a parasite.
Pluck strings on a guitar for 3 hours without thinking about it, draw circles on the ground all day long, walk in one direction for a week. Shock your body awake, engage your body in some kind of feedback loop.
Your mind is a prison, stop using it.

>>21971476
Four teenagers become friends and then have to journey around the world.

>decisions on my uni applications will be coming out soon
>I cringe reading them.
I'm fucked

>>21972899
thats because talk of male sexual freedom is verboten because we all know what that means.

>>21972873
1 is too much for me.

>>21967707
Seems like you instinctively lie to play up yourself and hide your (banal) insecurities. You're a fifth, not a fourth year student. No you're not impotent, you got your girlfriend pregnant. No you're not a philistine biology student, you're a fancy med student. Sounds cheesy but learn to love yourself, no one really cares at the end of the day and you're fine really anyway.

I regret so much being friends for that long just to realize that theres nothing in common between us, no deeper friendship, just killing time. There were signs all this time but I was so blind all this time because I was naive for believing that quantity means quality.

>>21972969
What?

Got so drunk last night that I fell asleep in my big winter jacket

I am extremely happy after finding love

I moved in with my gf but I miss being a gymcel. I have no time to read books, play vidya or watch kino uninterrupted, she always wants to watch some netflix movie or have sex or go out. Don't move in before marriage bros. My life is work and chores and more work and chores for my gf. I am whipped, it's over

>>21967436
I can no longer post on my laptop. I'm not banned or anything but the captcha won't load anymore. I guess I'm out. Peace.

>>21973185
I'm happy for you anon and I hope it lasts forever
Just knowing that something good is happening out there makes me feel very slightly better

>>21973260
Have you tried deleting your cache?

There are so many different versions of this book and I don't know which one to buy.
https://www.chapters.indigo.ca/en-ca/home/search/?keywords=GAS%2C%20GASOLINE%20AND%20OIL-ENGINES#facetIds=561001&internal=1

If I could survive off of just ton katsu alone, I would.

Why is Blood Meridian being spammed?

>>21973319
movie

>>21973321
If I look that up, am I going to see that it's a Netflix movie, or a real movie?

>>21973327

I get along pretty well with people, men and women, but I've got this one group of friends and whenever I go to a party their female friends are always so rude. They look you up and down and scowl at you.

>>21973450
Not worth having them as friends though. Its a common cheap tactic that people do. If your a dick to people it means your cool and exclusive and this some how raises your social value. It usually works with women if they are pretty and with men if they are competent at something, either way people who are going to just default to being a dick to someone over superficial appearances or first impressions aren't really people I would want to have in my life. I appreciate them doing that because its a huge red flag for me to just avoid them, kind of like how poisonous frogs are brightly colored to warn predators.

I do feel like an autist for wanting to be honest when communicating with people.

>>21972438
What were your fantasies about?

The horror :)

>>21973581
Realize that you are not really communicating with most people

I’m slightly jealous of people who don’t find modern life to disenchanting. I’m slightly jealous also of people who have a lot of conviction about themselves and their purpose while they’re young.

>>21973630
what do you mean?

>>21973810
nta, but when your talking to someone its an imperfect way of communicating. A lot of people will lie or agree with you just to make their lives easier. A lot of people will talk about inane things instead of anything important, probably because if you stick your neck out for anything these days someone will come by and attempt to ruin your life over it.

>>21973897
Is it me who's at fault for wanting to speak honestly?

>>21973906
No, its basically everyone's fault while simultaneous being no one's fault. This is why Governments and Corporations can get away with doing fucked up shit and the people who were "fired" (aka performative acts of apologies) get golden parachutes. Its one of those weird paradoxes where everyone is at fault so you really can't blame anyone and you can't really even go after people who do it because its very understandable why they are acting that way. Its a vicious self repeating cycle of harm (I'm using the term harm very loosely here).

>>21973933
I see. Thanks for clarification. I wont seek any connection with people anymore.

>>21973977
lol psyoped by 4chan

>>21970359

>>21973581
Literally who cares, by all "polite standards" you're probably a retarded freak, you're either honest and accept the rejection that comes with the chance of connecting with people or feign a persona and get nothing but indifference. Outside of work it has zero real consequences anyways

>>21973581
What do you mean by this? Can you be more specific?

As a general rule, there are some things that are honest but don’t need to be explicitly said, or can be expressed using tact and kindness instead of brutal honesty. You really have to try to see things from the other person’s perspective and consider the way that your words will be perceived by the listener. Don’t use “wanting to be honest” as an excuse for being callous and unnecessarily unkind.

>>21974015
>you're either honest and accept the rejection that comes with the chance of connecting with people
I do feel better when I'm honest and brutal than indifferent.
>>21974023
It's just a desire to be honest, like not chit-chatting about unimportant things or putting fake personas and then gossiping behind back. Being empathetic, kind and tact is good but it usually ends up as sugar-coated, coddling and feminine communication when there's a motion of speaking but nothing actually is being said.

Lol the people next door are dicks. They're having a BBQ and filled my apartment with smoke. I asked them to move the BBQ next time, and they told me I should just leave whenever they're BBQing because they like keeping their BBQ near my window and vents and it wouldn't be comfy for them to put it on the other terrace because it's in shade (and next to their vents and windows).

Before I just ignored them violating quiet hours, but now I see why other apartments have been calling them cops on them. I think the people calling them cops probably went over at 2am asking them to turn the noise down, and got a similar response.

is there a reason why wikipedia pages about towns and cities in the us have not been updated with data from the 2020 census? they all have a section on the 2000 census and the 2010 census. i don't care about 23 year old census information.

Every time I think of an ex dating another man and being happy, I tell myself "They won't be together for life," and I feel slightly better. It's mean and I know it but that's how I cope with celibacy. Even if that's true, even if we live in a time where marriage and commitments don't mean shit anymore and everyone will waste years of their lives dating someone they think is the one but isn't, that's still a pretty shitty thing to do. I probably deserve everything bad that ever happened to me because I'm such a bad person, after all.

>>21967436
What can you do with a depressed person, that says he wants to die and stuff like this

I'm quite lost

I’m going to quit my job tomorrow I think.

>>21974112
Is it you or someone else?

>>21974149
A real IRL friend says these things.

>>21974112
Give them the link to dignitas or another legal euthanasia route.

>accidentally set dating app to show both genders
>men: "I'm a physicist! My lifelong dream is to build my own observatory, on my own land."
>women: "A perfect hummus or pesto is bae"

>>21967436
/lit/ is the most reddit, the most Twitter, the most faggot fucking board on this entire website. Even /LGBT/ has more self-respect and individual culture than this parasitic billboard of a board. I hate all of you. Your writing is shit and if I ever meet any of you IRL I will rape you.

>>21974158
I suppose it depends on the particularities of the person then. Some people will be inclined to the respond to the sense of duty and responsibility. Others will be inclined to respond to the sense that there’s really nothing to gain, or at least no rush when it comes to suicide. Others simply won’t feel differently until their life changes. Others can get through it with simple companionship. Others will never get through it. I suppose there is no one right thing to say. All you can do is try to understand and offer your own serious and sincere opinion. If you sincerely think he has reasons to live, he should know that and what they are. Possibly, it would be worthwhile to take the guy on some sort of adventure. Go for a hike, a hunt, go camping, go for a trip, something. A little life experience can stave off depression for a while.

>>21974173
>the most faggot fucking board
>if I ever meet any of you IRL I will rape you.
And you expect us to not be ass up in a mask with the door unlocked? What kind of faggot are you? Kind of disappointed in >>>/lgbt/ now because they failed to explain Craigslist or Grindr to you.

>>21974177
Thanks.

>right-leaning, "based," redpilled dude
>likely drives a truck and owns a gun or two
>hates women being whores
>but also calls dudes losers for being virgins
>hates woke LGTBWTFBBQ nonsense
>but also refuses to take a stand when it counts and mutters something about not caring about what people do in private if it doesn't affect him
I've met a couple of these people and they irritate me to no end.

>>21974239
People that mushy and inconsistent in their thoughts just go with whatever the status quo is, when we revert to a nationalistic/patriotic society soon those guys will be muttering about how they don't like degenerate behavior or whatever. It'll be just as thoughtless from the other direction and often overbearing and indiscriminate, but at least it'll be on the side of negating faggotry instead of enabling it

Peasants are "conservative" only in the sense that they conserve the momentum of whatever the status quo is, which means all its bad traits as well

I feel trapped in my life and too old to escape.

>>21974168
>make a fake female dating acc just to see whos my competition
>realize that I have no chance against those guys
its been brutal, deleted all my profiles after that

>>21974256
Why do you have no chance against those guys? Because they're good looking or because they're liars?

>>21974256
You can alternatively find something in your city that fits your weird interests (this is a filter to the pool of people you will meet). Like watching art house films at 9PM in an old theater to meet weird art house women.

Or you could just repeatedly go to say, have a workday at a local coffee place (expensive) to just meet and socialize with new people (you might even meet your wife randomly there).

SwipeApps do work, they're just so much more explicit about these things.

>>21974256
It is better to love and respect yourself than trade it for someone else's love and respect. A lot of people who are pushed to some sort of achievement and/or greatness are people who feel the most inferior or inadequate inside and cannot bare to admit it. What propels them is fear and negativity, not that its necessarily a bad thing nor all all high achievers like this but I'd rather just be seen as a loser outwardly by people if it means that I don't have to do this exhausting "keeping up appearances" thing a lot of people do in the modern world. Maybe its because my parents engage in that type of behavior and they were always too tired to do anything with me and any time they would sit in a comfortable place they would pass out.

I really cannot convey just how much I regret my career and job choices.

>>21974256
The only way to use dating apps is to create some kind of psychic forcefield around yourself that prevents you from drawing any conclusions or thoughts from them other than the bare minimum needed to use them

If you let your subconscious freely "range" while using them, it will pick up so many psychosis-inducingly ugly messages in the span of five minutes. Every gesture and every thing you have to do use the app is loaded with diseased presuppositions that you have to accept tacitly and infect yourself with just to be able to keep using it. The very act of using it is a form of begging, it's a ritual humiliation. You are coming humbly to the door of all these hags who set the "You must be this tall to ride" bar way above your head, so you simply know before you've even started that you are operating at a deficit, you are shit by default, your only role in life is to try to leverage your horrible assets and the bad hand you've been dealt and try to pull off a miracle.

Millions upon millions of men around the world right now thinking they are shit by default, that they are a bad hand, that anything they get, even just a woman deigning to talk to them, is a miracle that has to be followed by more miracles if they want to seal the deal. None of this is conscious, it's all implied, you just soak it up. How many men are there living right now who would have been happy, productive fathers, reading to their children right now, but instead they're perfuming their balls because some absurd new trend says it'll give them a 0.007% greater chance of attracting a girl, and begging a woman over a digital medium to even let them TALK to her?

At the same time, the women are horrible low tier bags of shit. They're so low tier and so generic and have so few characteristics of any kind, that they don't even permit men the space to think "I don't even like these women, why am I putting myself through such hell to talk to them?" You can't even develop that thought, because the women aren't even distinct enough in their personality or stated interests to give you a handhold to criticize them. They simply "are," it's just an endless fuzzy fluctuating field of :DD :PPPP :P!! :DD!!!! women doing nothing and saying nothing, reinforcing the overall sense that everything that is YOU is not tall enough to ride everything that is WOMAN, in general. You aren't even being rejected by individual women, you are being rejected by All Women Everywhere, who are all the same :DDD :)))!! I LOVE FOOOOOD! I LOOOOVE HAVING FEELINGS ABOUT SENSATIONS :DDDDD carefree child that lives in a sunlit paradise land to which you are not invited.

>>21974285
Both, Im no match as an ugly neurodivergent to attractive narcissists/sociopaths.
>>21974303
I live in a town with under 30k population. Theres nothing here.
>>21974316
Im just a starving artist without the artist part.

>>21972903
>live like a machine
This is no way to live as well. My mind is a complete prison. But It’s impossible to abandon. Maybe for a few fleeting moments, but consistently it can’t work unless I put a bullet in my head.

>>21974346
>I live in a town with under 30k population. Theres nothing here.

There is a coffee place because my town of 20k has one.

>>21974346
>>21974398
>20 to 30k
>I live in a city of 6 million
I fucking want to be you plz.

Receiving loads of spam lately. I wonder if I was part of some new data breach like 6 years ago. For some reason I kept using this mail and now I'm kinda worried.

As someone with ADHD the browser extension to hid all youtube recommendations, homepage, and sidebars has been an amazing time saver.

>>21972872
This is why we need to bring back child brides. Betrothed at 9.

>>21974494
Meant to reply to >>21972873

>>21974415
You really don't want to live here. I am known across the city as the big scary guy and I never even talk to epoplel

As a child, I used to feign bravery. I pretended for so long that I ended up believing whole heartedly that I was bold and steady and full of confidence. It was so much easier to dismiss my fears as a teenager. To put on an unbothered facade.
How could I have grown into such a cowardly adult? The thought of living life fills me with unpleasant dread. I’m hiding in my parents’ home. Delaying adulthood against my better judgment, and feeling rotten to my core. People on the socials are happy and healthy. Basking in sunlight and in each other’s company. I’ve retreated back into myself. Re-enacting a caricature of my adolescence. I used to be such a responsible, “mature” teenager. I did the right thing. I was functional. I was a real person.
Are people born with an exhaustive reservoir of tenacity? Is one’s ability to withstand hardship really finite? Did I deplete my resources in the first stretch of my life? I am withering from the inside. Yesterday, for the first time in two years I felt my chest constrict under the weight of some invisible sturdy boulder. And today I felt an inexplicable panic bubble within me. These months of nothingness were filled with nothing but introspection and contemplation. But since I am a creature of borderlines, the self study turned into obsessive scrutiny. And now my father re-iterates that knowing oneself is the beginning of all wisdom. But I know myself. Too much of myself. I am grossly immersed in myself. When I lacked that knowledge, I was bewildered and confused and bitter. And now I do and I am overwhelmed and afraid. I am afraid. My mind would not go quiet. AND I CANT GET MY HANDS ON MEDS.

Everytime I am about to give up, an imaginary friend appears and keeps me going and I can suddenly keep up a little longer. "Whatever happens now is out of my hands! Good luck !" I think. I don't think I am a schizo or insane. I'm doing it willingly and I'm just glad it works.

I get disappointed way more when I actually try and fail.

At what age should you just give up?

>>21974720
Give up on what?

>>21974723
Like your life ambitions or who you want to be

>>21974729
10 years old

>>21974335
Insightful but depressing post.

>>21974335
“Carefree child who lives in a sunlit paradise land to which you are not invited” is an incredibly uncharitable and inaccurate way to characterize women’s experiences. Women can experience rejection too, and dating apps are bad and dehumanizing for everyone. As a woman, you receive so many messages that trying to figure out how to respond to them feels stressful and overwhelming. You’re fielding messages that are just a generic “hey” or “what’s up” or banal compliments on your appearance or stupid references to Netflix shows or pop culture franchises. Worse are the guys who don’t even bother with a greeting before asking if you’re dtf. Men’s profiles are on the whole just as generic and cringe-inducing as women’s. You have what feels like the same conversations over and over with the same people. Then you end up going on awkward dates where you realize that these guys who seemed so interested in hearing your thoughts over text don’t even actually care about what you have to say, and that since they’ve already decided that they want to fuck you there’s no need for you to be particularly interesting or engaging. Just being a present willing participant is enough. They’re surreptitiously looking at your cleavage and catching a hungry glimpse of the exposed thigh as your dress shifts when you get up from your seat, and all the while counting down until the moment at the end of the night when they’ll try to make a move.

The counter to your point is that dating apps foster a desperation in men that causes them to see women as a category to which they wish to gain access, rather than as individual people with individual preferences and experiences and opinions. I agree that dating apps make women entitled in a way that’s harmful to men, but they also make men see women as less than human. It’s shitty for everyone.

>inb4 “you’re a whore”
I’m not. I’ve never hooked up with anyone from a dating app.

>>21971762
Good, go for it.

>>21975006
>>21974335
Overcomplicated. Just fuck each other, pop out some kids and you can have your own hobbies. No need to play jesters.

>>21974622
>People on the socials are happy and healthy.
fake

>>21975006
If you lived one day as an incel you would kill yourself. You have no idea how bad it is. Some of these guys have not had a single person in their entire lives that they can remember even validate their existence. All the bad or unsatisfying validation you dislike and all the interest from men you don't deem worthy of your time because they weren't Prince Charming may seem shitty to you, but it's because you have absolutely no idea what it's like to have nothing and to feel like you are nothing. There are men on this very forum who haven't been physically touched in 20+ years and who have simply accepted that they are some sort of repulsive unwanted freak in a society that hates them and actively wants them to die. It's not true but they are convinced of it at a level you couldn't imagine. It's part of their very body language and the way they navigate the world, they shrink away from people after so many years of people being indifferent to them at best, annoyed by them at worst.

Women have a whole different psychology that is based on validation and contentment and basic pleasure-seeking. They are nesters. They don't have any of the same drives that men have, all of which are stifled and only allowed to manifest in broken and awful ways currently. Literally check your privilege. The only thing you could possibly experience that even comes close to what random incels experience on a daily basis is the pain of finding out you are infertile and can never have a child, or the pain of the last of your frozen eggs failing to inseminate. All the pain you would feel in the moment of receiving that news, the pain of being a dead husk in a world that is totally indifferent to you, robbed of all the experiences you have looked forward to and been taught to expect your whole life, is spread out across an incel's whole life as the default color of his existence. Most of them become bitter broken people as a result and then have to endure being mocked and scolded for being so fucked up, when it was never their fault that they became that fucked up, ANYONE would become that fucked up when treated the way they were treated.

Call me an incel if you want, I'm married, I just know what these people go through and I know it's nothing like the mild inconveniences you are complaining about. Mild inconveniences which are the result of women's own actions, wanting their cake and eating it too for the last 20 years.

>>21975141
Is there any way for incels to recover besides divine intervention?

>>21975243
you could try SUCC (Succeeding Under Certain Conditions)

>>21975259
>Succeeding Under Certain Conditions
what conditions?

>>21975273
certain

Attractive male here. Having creepy weirdos oggle and stalk you is extremely unpleasant. I actually totally understand why women will often make themselves ugly. Ive had stalker women harass me, but desu that cant possibly be as terrifying as being a weak and soft female having predatory men stalk you. Attention is dangerous.

Some fag lord on /his/ keeps spamming low quality posts and is getting my mobile network banned, every fucking day. People who use /his/ are the lowest of the low.

>>21975141
I literally used to be a femcel. I was objectively ugly until I was like 21. I was fat, had horrible cystic acne and acne scarring, frizzy hair, and oversized gap teeth. People were mean as fuck to me. I never had a single guy my age voluntarily acknowledge my existence, let alone express interest in me, unless they were obligated to because we worked together or had a group project or something. Even then, they would treat me with a sort of awkward politeness, making sure not to be too friendly lest I get the idea that they might be interested. I got very few matches on dating apps, and the ones I did get were from men who basically wanted to use me as a human fleshlight because they thought I was too unattractive to expect any kind of respect or kindness, and would have never considered actually taking me on a date. Women were actively nasty to me or treated me with pity. I would have phone interviews for jobs and do great, but then when the interviewer saw me at the follow-up interview in person their face would freeze and I would never hear back. I was excluded from social events or invited as an afterthought. I know exactly how bad it is.

After I lost a lot of weight, got on prescription acne medication, got Invisalign, and figured out how to do my hair and makeup in a flattering way, I became somewhere in the average range. I’ll never be hot, but I’m not bad looking. People are so much nicer to me now that it’s not even funny. I get asked out regularly in person, and get a lot of attention on dating apps. If I’m out somewhere and seem upset or lost, men will approach me and ask if I’m okay or if they can do anything to help. People actually take me seriously when I talk. I’ll never get over how weird it is to have guys get nervous around me, as though they find me intimidating.

I know what incels experience. I know exactly what it’s like to have nothing and feel that you are nothing. I’ve been on both sides of the equation. I wouldn’t go back for anything, so yeah, they do have it worse. My only point was that “carefree child who lives in a sunlight paradise land to which you are not invited” is an absurd way to characterize women’s lives. My life is only marginally happier now than it was when I was extremely unattractive, and getting male attention didn’t fix the fundamental problems and insecurities that I have or prevent me from dealing with extremely painful experiences of rejection. I have female friends who are highly attractive, and even their lives aren’t perfect. Despite being beautiful, a lot of them still get cheated on and treated badly by men or were targeted by sexual predators and groomed at a young age.

I don’t expect men to be Prince Charming in order to be worthy of my attention. I just want to find someone who I connect with on an intellectual and emotional level, who I genuinely enjoy talking to and spending time with. I’m not looking for a 10/10 chad.

>>21975243
The only way in my opinion is to get off the hedonic treadmill, by discovering purpose and creating a sense of self outside of "wanting to be happy" in the short term. They're all trying to do this in their own ways but it's usually shit like watching influencers telling them to GOMAD for CHAD instead of actually doing anything self-transformative. I also think a lot of them focus too narrowly on "self-improvement" that is still basically hedonic, like lifting weights and doing other cosmetic shit, again without actually creating a center of gravity for themselves that gives life meaning beyond looking good so you can get laid.

The ones who simply stumble into some sense of self are the luckiest ones, usually through religion or by making money or getting more authority and responsibility in their job as they age.

I think the unfairest thing is that one of the key realizations they will make after finishing whatever their personal journey is, is that they were always valid from the start, and it was society that was fucked up, and that being a moral person and being proud in themselves for living a good life has its own value beyond any hedonic or sexual payoff it brings in normie society, because normie society is insanely fucked up right now and the only way to be happy in it is to be unconscious anyway. If you could somehow figure this out early and just gain that basic faith and confidence that you aren't a failure for failing to get pussy or be normie successful, because pussy is boring and normies are retarded, it would make it a lot easier to transcend normie culture and create a life and carve out a livelihood for yourself (which will then paradoxically make it easier to get pussy and make normies acknowledge you as successful if that's what you really want for some reason). But it's sort of like the keys are locked inside the car they are supposed to unlock, you only realize this once you already get to the end and it's no longer relevant.

tldr Incels should understand that it's not their fault, it's society's for having a busted moral code right now, but that this doesn't mean they should/can just have no moral code either, they should instead somehow get in touch with a higher code and live by it. Hedonism is fucking boring, pussy is boring, women are awful, normies are all unhappy or unconscious. Find religion or get rich and ride out the collapse of society or something. No matter what just don't feel like you failed because you didn't get some hag with the mind of a child on an Instagram chatroom app to be your "girlfriend" as a 32 year old man. There is more to life than having "crushes" on qt girls and hoping they hold your hand, all of this is feminized priorities stemming from the total capture of society by women and their inane priorities.

>>21975314
>like lifting weights and doing other cosmetic shit,
Clarifying: I don't have anything against lifting weights, it can be a great way to gain motivation and a sense of control over yourself, Sun and Steel and all that. I'm just saying I've known a lot of ripped gymcels who were still miserable, and then I've known weird little guys you'd guess were incels but they were happy and married because they had some inner light and met a nice girl at church.

>>21975281
so a miracle. got it.

>>21975308
Damn thats rough. I do feel bad for ugly women. And I do try to treat them humanely but you're right that it always comes off as condescending. It is just a fact of life that beauty matters and that lacking beauty makes life difficult. Realizing how superficial things really are leaves a person jaded. Its all just a game.

>>21975308
If it helps, I don't take you seriously when you talk. I am just joking. But the sunlit paradise thing is still real. You are an unusual case, most women are "fine" and "fine" is more than enough for entry to the sunlit paradise. There are a billion 4's and 5's out there who don't have a hundredth of the interiority or inner life that you have because they simply never needed to. It's like Vilar said
>Why do women not make use of their intellectual potential? For the simple reason that they do not need to. It is not essential for their survival. Theoretically it is possible for a beautiful woman to have less intelligence than a chimpanzee and still be considered an acceptable member of society.
This isn't just a snide remark, it's literally true.

Also, you went from the experience of a 3/10 man (and there are worse) to the experience of an 9/10 man with a few tweaks. Incels can't do that. Plenty of incels are good looking and doing everything right at the surface, and yet they are in that notorious 80% of men that women rate as below average, they are invisible. Hypergamy is currently out of control.

You are only marginally happier because you developed interiority and you can't un-develop it. But most women never develop it to begin with. Most of these women literally do have the minds of children or maybe a really bright chimp. They have nothing in their heads other than consuming. They take every single experience as it comes, like a child does. The world is a bright place for them and it's structured in their favor. It's why almost all women have built-in "just world fallacy," because they have no theory of mind and can't conceive of life being anything other than basically nice.

I remember the first time I told a fairly smart girl that men don't have the same prospects as them. She was telling me something like what you're saying here, that it's tough being on the woman's end too when things don't work out after a date or two. But I told her, no, it's different because he can't just go get another suitor tomorrow, you can. You might have been his only prospect in six months, or even years. I know really cool, good looking, tall successful guys who have gotten laid maybe twice in 6 years, because they just keep falling through the cracks of this sexual economy. Anyway, the girl I was talking to was shocked, but characteristically, it wasn't due to pity for these men, it was because I devalued the dating experience for HER by telling her that men will often try to attain her even if they don't really want her, because hey she's better than nothing. This spooked her.

Either way, she genuinely had simply never thought about how easy or hard or rare it is for men to get matches, get a date. She assumed everyone had the same default experience of life, hers, which is basically carefree, with basically plentiful everything (including matches and attention). That's most women, even if it's not you.

Thread's over bump limit fyi.

>>21975314
Well, Im a wizard and you're a married person. You've been validated by women and Im not. Can you imagine being so sickening to not even being able to acquire the most basic human experience? Im not even talking about relationship or sex but a kiss or even a fuck handholding. I would say its similar to being born without legs but hell even then you probably get some sympathy. Its more akin to having a foul odor which acts as an invisible repellant of social interactions. You can take a shower or put cologne but its there, its always there.

>>21975417
I have survivor's guilt because I was intended for wizard status and managed to bullshit my way out of it by being the right mix of crazy and lucky at the right times. But most of my friends ended up wizards or pseudo-wizards who had sex or a gf one time and never managed to get it again.

>Can you imagine being so sickening to not even being able to acquire the most basic human experience?
This is what you have to get out of your mind, you are not sickening. Just meditate on this fact: in any other time in history you would have figured something out by now. Even if you want to go back as far as the 1800s and just meditate on the fact that you could be a weird guy or a quiet guy or an ugly guy and none of it would have mattered because at the end of the day, you need a job, and at the end of the day, some woman nearby needs a husband. The DEFAULT in previous eras was marriage, and it was more important that you were a stable provider than that you were handsome. Same went for women too. Chinese proverb: "an ugly wife is a blessing in the home."

This doesn't mean all these systems were ideal either. But it does show you that there is nothing magical about "dating." WHAT WE CALL "DATING" IS A HISTORICALLY CONTINGENT CULTURAL PHENOMENON. It only gradually developed in the 20th century and only became its current retarded form in the 80s and 90s, when people became so totally unmoored from practical necessities that they didn't even have to have the "alright, but let's get serious here, I need a wife/husband" moment like even hippie-ish people in the 70s still did.

You need to contextualize this culturally and historically. You are not "sickening," you are "sickening" within a VERY bizarre historical and cultural bubble in which women were allowed to go completely haywire and dominate society and turn it into a perpetual "he loves me he loves me not" daydream for themselves, and look at what it has done for them and to them. They are all even more schizophrenic than incels are. It only even looked like this was going to be the default forever for a moment there in the 2010s, but now even normies realize we have completely destroyed everything by letting women run rampant like this.

>>21975495
Does internalizing this knowledge mean you can magically go get laid? Maybe not. But it should at least take the sting out of thinking you're some unique loser. You just aren't. In any previous era, you would have a boring middle tier wife you maybe occasionally fuck, and get this, sex wouldn't be that important to you so you wouldn't care. There is a famous book I forget, about how all great cultures have been sexually repressed and empirically it is hard to find examples of modern sex crazy culture in them. Sex positivity is and constant sex "visibility" is 20th century propaganda pushed by data-falsifiers and flagrant liars like Margaret Mead. It is NOT normal for men to be this obsessed with sex. Sex is a small part of life. It only seems otherwise right now because we are living in an incredibly feminized culture in which women have imposed THEIR understanding of reality on everyone else like a psychic field, in the absence of any robust and confident male culture to counter it, and it just so happens that women's understanding of reality is something between a neverending tea party gossip session with the gals and a neverending high school drama session with the school hunks. Just reject the whole thing.

It's literally like you're living in some dystopian society that forces everyone to live in a perpetual high school, and all the 40 year olds are standing around leaning against lockers wearing tattered football gear and going "Sup? You taking Becky to the prom?," and you're upset that you can't "succeed" in this completely made-up, post-apocalyptic culture of Tunnel Snake retards. Just repudiate the whole thing and at least enjoy the fruits of the wasteland. Go off road. There has never been a better time to fuck whores. Get rich, fuck whores, pay for a surrogate to carry your baby so you can have a kid, be a single father, and raise your child to be a charismatic dictator who can overturn this whole mess and overthrow the Tunnel Snakes once and for all.

>>21975364
To be honest, I agree with you in some ways. Upper-middle class conventionally attractive women can be some of the most insufferable people to interact with, because so often their whole worldview is suffused with this profound sense of entitlement. It’s as though they exist in a different universe, where they can get away with the most fucked up behaviour and face few to no repercussions. This isn’t true in all cases—some of my closest friends are among that group—but it’s true in many cases. It’s especially galling that these women so often milk the narrative of being oppressed as women living in a sexist society, while failing to ever acknowledge the immense unearned power and privilege that they themselves benefit from.

I remember reading this post on Reddit years back, by this girl who had an awkward autistic-seeming male grocery cart collector approach her as she was getting into her car, and ask her on a date. He asked pretty politely and took it well when she declined, but she was all outraged about it and was asking for advice on whether she should call up his employer and report him for harassment. I was so disgusted by how out of touch with reality she was: she was willing to potentially have this man lose his livelihood simply because he’d made her slightly uncomfortable for a few minutes. The worst part was that all the women in the comments were encouraging her to report him, acting as though he had committed some egregious act of sexual harassment and violated her boundaries just by existing as a socially awkward and unattractive man and daring to express interest.

I guess it just sucks for me, because I can’t help but feel alienated and annoyed when I’m around most of my female peers, but interactions with men are always fraught with weirdness because sexuality complicates things.

Having a lot of options doesn’t mean that it’s easy to find a satisfying relationship though. If one date goes badly I know I can easily get another, but I hate the whole phony and weird process of talking to guys and setting up dates with them. Going through the motions is so draining and demoralizing.

>>21975495
>>21975497
Maybe its my circumstances but Im surrounded by rather average guys who can have sexual experience rather easily despite you saying that modern dating is cancer, on which I do agree. It leaves me whos at wrong. Besides, I wouldnt care about all this sexual aspect of live if I've had something but I dont. I've been severaly depressed since the puberty (around 20 years by now) and only now I've been able to do baby steps without getting anxious and overwhelmed. Guess what? I'm supposed to perform an olympic 100m dash when I was in deep coma yesterday. Sorry for vent.

>>21975501
>oh woe is me
Fuck off

>>21975571
Lol, seethe harder

>>21974303
Weird interest haver. Someone in the seat next to me tried to talk to me at a performance they clearly weren't interested in and I irl ghosted them because I wanted to give my full attention to the show. Your post is maybe not the best advice.

next
>>21975630
>>21975630

>>21975569
You have to have one foot in each world, you have to do everything you can to succeed like your friends have, but while also knowing that a lack of success doesn't mean anything about you essentially. It's a difficult game to play but you have to use your sense of self outside the system for stability while improving and refining your "self" within the system. But the best way to do this is still to just have such a transcendent source of value, like money or status or some kind of higher confidence or membership in a culture (like a church) that gives you access to better people than stock normies, that you don't have to play the bullshit game of making a normie-acceptable self and winning the pussy lottery anymore. But you can still keep running the pussy gauntlet in the meantime, and statistically you will probably get something eventually.

I just think it's safer and healthier to think like "I want to heal this depression I've had since puberty because it's the right thing to do for me, and I know I am valuable and I have life goals and it would help me achieve them, and maybe I'd also have an easier time dating," than to think "I need to fix my depression because it's making my chances of getting a sacred chimp vagina go from 0.25% per attempt to 0.02% per attempt!" Do it for thee, not for she. You have all kinds of value and skills you probably don't acknowledge enough because you are only looking for success in the normie world. I used to be terrified of women and intimidated by them and now because I understand more about life and have my own value system apart from their social tyranny I see them as barely tolerable retards, and this ironically makes it infinitely easier to attract them, because I can choose how I associate with them and keep my cool. It's trite but you really do have to like yourself and know who you are.

I obviously can't say much about your life specifically but I'm just saying, I bet if you could see yourself objectively you'd at least think more like "he's a work in progress but a good guy" than "this fucking loser can barely keep it together." And I think it's a shame that 150 years ago you'd have a wife and family to help you do it, even DESPITE being somewhat depressed and having some struggles. That should show you that the two aren't related. You aren't "wrong," you're just fucked over, which is still shitty, but it's not a moral failing on your part. That said, like I was saying above you should still be striving to improve, both for inner spiritual reasons and for simple strategic reasons of having more fun in life and getting the things you want.

>>21975501
I have known women a lot like you in my life and I definitely sympathize. This seems to be a type, and it's a unique struggle because it's not like with incels, where you can at least go and talk to your bros and play Warhammer or whatever, you are swimming in a sea of constant but shallow female companionship and it must be hard to even find other women who can even fix their eyes on the issues you see for long enough to talk about them and not just regurgitate cope or thoughtless normie platitudes. I appreciate that you have empathy for the men too.

The women I've known who were like you also struggled with finding a guy who matched their level of inner alertness. They always felt torn between basic bitch guys and retarded incels who want you to be their new mommy. Usually they would get burned by each of these types in turn. I also saw the hell they went through trying to go on dates and find something genuine, and the constant disappointment when guys would wait just long enough for them to get their hopes up before doing something awful and ruining any possibility of feeling something for that guy. It must be really rough as a woman who "sees" all this. When I was younger I would try to just export my own autistic male experience over to them, but I think women's needs and priorities are too different, so I always felt at a loss about how to even say anything useful. I guess I feel the same now.

I've also known girls who had just enough interiority that the spell of soulmatedom was broken for them because they were too self-aware of their ability to "pick" a guy, the fact that no obvious #1 champion was going to present himself on their dates and they were eventually just going to have to pick the least worst basic guy and go for the long haul with him. I think is partly another product of modern dating culture, which prioritizes cinematic "summer love" stories over realistic considerations and mature conversations, like one about mutual compatibility despite a lack of burning passion.

I hope you do find someone special. For what it's worth I can think of male friends who would be a good fit for someone like you. They are definitely out there. I guess it's just a numbers game for both sides.

Posting this in the dead thread so I don't clutter the new one.

>>21975635
Not going to lie, that would require to me to stop hoping about ever being accepted by normal people and society. I do feel like a caveman transported into high class society. No suit or table manners will make an aristocrat, nor I can go back to my tribe. I do have a little faith going on but its weak without understanding on why this suffering happened to me. To go against society one must have a clear vision and confidence but I simply lack of these things.

>>21967802
made a decent haul of dvds and most of the stuff was in pretty good condition too but i didn't end up finding any books worth getting unfortunately