/lit/ - Literature

This one time I woke up and took a piss, but I had to stand really far back from the toilet.

Thus Spoke Harry Potter, and I didst listen to his words. My morality was learnt partially by the hackneyed maxims of a parent and the rest by the fables and foibles of Harry and his companions. Then I learnt to wack off.

Me age 12:

-Every famous five book,
-Every goosebumps book
-Every Just William book
-A lot of Point Horror books
-A lot of stephen king.
-The complete works of Orwell.
-Most of Discworld.

>>2196124
My screen flickered it was an email from me telling me what my first book was.
To xxxx
CC:xxxx
From: xxxx
Subject: first book you read was a little thing that was probably given to many kids
--------------------------------------------------------
Your first book was a book in which the first several pages were just the word look. I cannot remember the title, but it said look for most of the pages. And then at the end it said the words "look mum, I can read."
After that you would run around saying "look" and writing it all over the walls. You were only around 2 years. Maybe.

My reply was

To: xxxx
From: xxxx
Subject: thank you
------------------------------------------------------------
But seriously, who the fuck were you CCing, and why?

>naiveness
>naivety

you're a mothefucker

My fathers favorite book to beat me with was a Dorling Kindersley Encyclopedia, 1987 edition i think. One time he hit me so hard the print came off on my skin. I can still remember the nurse at the hospital saying "is that Tutankhamuns mask?"

I moved to a new place and walked around the neighborhood. There were some older kids playing and I thought I could talk to them. They were okay and invited me to a picnik beside the fire, friday night, each one would bring a type of food. I was excited and told my mom. Friday night, she dressed me up and gave me a plastic plate with some sort of muffins. There was no one. The street was completely empty and I could see the changing light of televisions inside the houses and the sound of boring soap operas. They lied to me, for nothing. And I believed them. I came home, ignored my mom as she asked me what happened, went to my room and cried.

>Be 14 years old
>Trade my gameboy and games for a new copy of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
>My friends: bertstare.jpg

>Be 11 years old
>Feel up a girl's "boobs" while she's drinking from a water fountain at school

>>2196219
I know that feel.
That emptiness. That worthlessness. I'm sorry that happened to you.

I mostly read Lemony Snicket, Eragon, Shel Silverstein and Daniel Pinkwater as a kid. However I was never an avid reader..

Treasure Island fucking rocked.