/lit/ - Literature

>>21882786
Beamish is better.

MY ASS IS A SWAMP

>>21882786
I put my dick in that before I took the picture

>>21882794
You should see a doctor about that

Im thinking about distancing myself from parents, brother, two friends and other people in general to soften the impact of my suicide. Its easier to bear it for them when I dont partake any role in their life.

>>21882786
My Jewess muse... your hooked nose, snagging my heart. Bazongas bounce, bodacious boobas. Was it 6,000,000? Maybe more.
My love for you is like a truck

New thread
>>21882798
>>21882798

Remember kids. Don’t drink and post

>>21882801
No, then they'll just hate themselves for missing the big red flag which is you isolating yourself

>>21882801
Suicide is really only worth it if your an orphan, but you have family connections. If you won't live for yourself, live for them. Tell them what is going on and that you need help. Asking for help doesn't make you weak and it isn't a failure. Asking for help is basically a refusal of giving up but also acknowledging that you can't do it by yourself. To quote Marcus Aurelius: "We were born to help each other like left and right hands. One washes the other." Ask your other hand for help.

>>21882815
Thats assuming they're good enough to live for

>>21882801
Why are you being such a cowardly nigger? Have some bollocks and remember even to live is an act of courage. There's nothing waiting for you on the other side

>>21882820
Life in servitude, even in thankless servitude, is better than being dead. Sometimes the only way to dig yourself out of a hole is to start digging sideways to make a ramp.

>>21882828
>Life in servitude, even in thankless servitude, is better than being dead.
Why

>>21882835
Arbiet Macht Frei
Yes I know its "Le spooky summer camp sign" but its true. When you suffer you weather the storm and come out stronger than you were. Living life you have way more opportunities to get out of your predicament than you would if you were dead. Being dead is the end and its an end that will come for you no matter who you are so why try to accelerate that? When I was in my deep depressive state and suffering I found that the fact I would one day die very soothing. Its all going to end by its self naturally, you popped the proverbial quarter in the machine, may as well stick around and get your "money's worth".

I should go to bed and brush my teeth but I'm avoiding doing that because I don't want to brush my teeth. Opinions /lit/?

>>21882805
I doubt. I'm not a young person where you could say "he had so much potential" after suicide.
>>21882815
They cant help. They do not understand my situation.
>>21882822
>nothing waiting for you on the other side
nothing for me is on this side too.

>>21882924
>They cant help. They do not understand my situation.
So you were like me then. When I was depressed my friends all abandoned me, My mom (who I suspect is a narcissist) just kept on yelling at me and bullying me, My Dad is so defeated by my Mom and by life that he didn't really seem to care. When I confided to a "friend" that I was suicidal, he went around and told everyone and thought it was "funny". I felt pretty defeated in life. But then I started to get angry, angry that no one really seemed to love me. And I started thinking about how if I did commit suicide my Mom and Dad would both cry and get on the cope train and say stupid lies like "Oh it came out of nowhere.", "We had no idea this would happen.", and other insipid things (I went to therapy twice but my Mom constantly badgered me about 'Oh are you better yet?' because she was more concerned about putting money away for retirement than my mental health. I eventually just caved and pretended I was better just to get her off my back.) I used my depressive sadness to fuel my anger at the world. I deserved love, not romantic love, not sexual pleasure, but at leas the love of my family; and they didn't even give me that.
I started working out, I started running, I dumped all of my loser friends who just wanted to play shitty video games that I didn't even like and would never want to play something I wanted to play, I started studying. Over time, over a long period of time. I got better, I gain respect for myself, I gained competency in skills that can give me a good job.
I basically gave myself the love that I was refused by everyone, the hardships I went though, that almost subsumed me, only made me stronger. I wouldn't say "Yeah I'm a hardcore Bad Ass now and I fuck all the bitches." But things did get better, I'm no longer depressed. I can actually be alone in a room and not go fucking insane. I don't have social media or friends but it doesn't bother me at all. I have people who want to be my "friend" but its pretty empowering when they try to give me their number and I just politely refuse it. I don't really talk or do things with my family any more, I'm there for when they need me and the "big" holidays but that is about it. My point is that at the beginning I was stuck in a 6ft deep hole just with everyone I trusted and loved throwing dirt on me and instead of laying down and taking it so they could then use my corpse as some sort of sick attention grabbing trinket, I fucking dug my way out with my own two hands and let me tell you. Sex, Drugs, Alcohol... None of it compares to the victory I felt when I dug myself out of that hole. I felt invincible, I felt blessed, My whole body shook as I sobbed victoriously. I imagine people in the past might have felt this way, probably on a battlefield somewhere. But if you push through, you will taste the feeling of abject victory that only you can lay claim to.
/end blogpost

I envy poor people.
This might sound really stupid but hear me out, we (by we I mean the upper to lower middle class people) have been living our lives in such a superfluously easy way that we have become complacent, we are only consuming and creating but poor people don't have the ability to get those things so easily. they have to think about other more primitive things like food, shelter and other stuff there life is filled with meaningful tasks and it keeps them going (and to some extent the instinctive nature of being a human that we all share). but they don't think about hegalian dialects or the critique of pure reason because they don't have the fucking time because if they start thinking and stop doing they will die.

>>21882973
You could always just take the Stoics advice on this subject:
>"Do not waste your time with oratory (speeches), Poetry, or Belles-lettres (Fiction or books solely about theory with no practical application.)."

>>21882786
whenever I'm looking for shoes, I think "would a cool pirate wear these?" and if the answer is no, I do not buy them.

>>21882786
A little late for stouts, this is basically light ale weather now

>>21882958
but doesnt death defeat the winning?

I am interested in getting into poetry and shit but my attention is fucked and my brain is fried
and a lot of poets talk about love and stuff and I just don't relate to that at all
;

>>21883093
you gotta put yourself out there.
I literally mean you gotta gamble the lottery until you meet some bitch who looks and moves the way your dreams tell you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQJVDwk3QFI

it'll be the gayest thing in the world for someone like you. but half of it is being worthy of the challenge.
actually looking and acting like a man for the most part so you can play the part.

read gemmell.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQJVDwk3QFI

>>21882973
>I envy poor people
anon I uhh... have a solution... just... be poor?

>>21882786
It’s a lovely sunny Spring day. Just woke up next to the love of my life and feeling really grateful for everything and everyone around me. Been helping out my family with different errands which has been rewarding. Life is good

>>21883262
Hide post

I just woke up
I'm an option now
I'm not a satelite
I'm a little soldier waiting for my orders
I'm not the leader of the pack
Don't put that on me
Why are we still here?
We were supossed to leave an hour ago
I've made myself available
Was it a mistake?
I'm not a mini you
I just woke up

whats up fellers. it's a good morning.
has anyone figured out how to cope with ivan's argument in the brothers karamazov?

>>21883488
Yeah, believe in God

>>21883871
i don't know how. i think i'm approaching it wrong

>>21884121
Haven’t read BK, but I cope without god better than I did with. True the in between period of agnostic searching for that true faith was most agitating, but playing dumb is no refuge. We create our own meaning, we steer our own ship. Never mind what determinists say, live as free as you like.

>>21884165
i highly recommend giving this a read:
https://godandgoodlife.nd.edu/assets/261108/rebellion_brothers_karamazov.pdf
it's a short chapter from the book that succinctly conveys my main struggle.
it's very much worth the 30ish minutes it'd take to read it. i think it's like 20 or 30 pages
if you do read it, let me know what you think

>>21884204
>40 seconds a page
So e of us have dyslexia ya know

>>21884121
Read Kirkegaard

>>21884248
>just pretend, dude

>>21884226
im shit at math. you get the idea; it'll probably take 30 mins to read. the page number was a guess

>>21884248
i've been meaning to. i've got him on my shelf

A bunch of middle school girls came over to my house (parents are family friends), and they dogpiled on me and did other weird stuff to me I'd rather not say. It was so strange. What's wrong with children?

>>21884285
That sounds horrible, haha. You definitely shouldn't tell us more.

>>21884288
Keep in mind I was alone with these girls while the parents were talking. They kept hugging me and asking me to come over to their house. Then I sat down on the couch and one of the girls sat on the couch facing mine, and she had her legs up exposing her underwear. Sometimes they bumped into my crotch, but I don't know what was on purpose.

>>21884285
something like that happened to me. they sprayed me with waterguns and chased me around. breaking into a sprint was my mistake, but i was wearing my favorite shirt and didn't want it to get wet.
i don't understand how some people are attracted to kids. they're immature and animalistic. they're closer to beasts than to people

>>21884304
I tried not to touch them, but I didn't want to be rude about it.

>>21884309
i guess it's flattering that they saw you as a good candidate to seek validation from. but they are children, so i don't know how strict they are with their screening process

>>21884324
I also don't know what they're doing deliberately. Was she exposing her underwear deliberately? Were they touching my crotch deliberately? What did they want me to do at their house alone with them? Why did they keep hugging me? They were middle school aged, and from what I remember, I think I was self-aware about this stuff. They weren't 5 years old.

>>21884337
>I also don't know what they're doing deliberately. Was she exposing her underwear deliberately? Were they touching my crotch deliberately? What did they want me to do at their house alone with them? Why did they keep hugging me?
t.

>>21884337
i think it's probably the case that they were trying to see if they can get a reaction out of you. sort of like testing themselves; these are kids that are just starting to become aware of the realm of sexuality and romance.
it's like how boys will pretend to be cowboys and soldiers and shit. they're playing, which is really a way of learning.
if you're tempted to go along with their games, i'd suggest trying to stay away from them. flee temptation (physically)

>>21882958
You and I, and many others, have similar stories anon. I have learned to laugh at it. Some part of me has learned to love the "reaching but never quite getting there" of life. Sometimes, when I think about these things, I just burst out laughing and can't stop. I can't really name it, and I'm not trying to sound profound, but it just makes me feel real; maybe I'm a retarded pseud, but that's how it is for me. I really don't think there is anything more important than learning to see what's around you. I mean we just float by on autopilot if we don't make an active effort to be there. I'm going to go and get some work done now.

Less than a month left at my shitty job. Can't wait to be done, I haven't felt this good in months

>>21884368
Yea I only hugged them back, nothing else, and I tried to avoid looking at the upskirt.

>>21883483
Got this stuck in my head
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkxmFHV8ML8

Recently realized the last time we've seen each other was two years ago. It still hurts, so much so that just thinking of her quickens my heartbeats. I left our city so that I might no see her (or be seen by her?) by happenstance, and I cut ties with all the friends we had in common and stopped hanging out in places I knew she could also be in. Why do I run away? I don't fucking know. I just know I have to run. I've had only one major disappointement and it got me running from life, running from everything I've ever built in this world, running from everyone who ever knew the both of us. I've been running for two years, and I'm still running. To be honest and for all it is worth, I might just be running from the me reflected in her eyes.

Looks like I'm schizoposting now. Be at ease, I just want to disappear from everyone's memories. Not out of shame, but out of respect. I don't want anyone to see the lesser man that I've become.

>>21884271
I think the Knight of Faith captures amor fati better than Nietzsche ever could

>>21884285
Pedo larp

>>21884454
interesting. i will investigate

What’s the best book on why modernity came about in Europe first as opposed to Asia or South America perhaps?

>>21884461
Probably a history of glass work

>>21884461
The Bell Curve

Humanbros... We lost

>>21884485
Not a real AI.

>>21884458
It's not a pedo larp. Someone recently died in my family and my parents and the parents of the girls' are close family friends to talk about the funeral and other stuff. They brought their kids over, and they all happened to be extraverted middle school girls. While the parents were outside talking the girls were inside talking to me and messing with me. I have pictures I could prove it, but I'm not going to post them here for obvious reasons.

>>21884485
Do redditors really? Some people have a real job, with real skills, and will not ever be replaced by an AI. I fucking hate this retard take on AI. Yes AI can take your idiot cashier job (dumb fucking robots can, too, actually) but it won't replace engineers nor writers nor surgeons, or whatever.

>>21884496
So... you could prove it but you can't?

>>21884501
And good luck finding an AI more accurate than doctors. Stupid TikTok-brained redditors can't even understand that AI are way more limited than humans when it comes to criss-crossing sources and making poised judgements. Idiots can't even figure out how to use operators to do a Google Search so it's no wonder you think an AI who is scrapping stuff on the internet is all-knowing and going to replace humans.

>>21884496
Is it extraverted or extroverted?

>>21884496
>I have pictures
Not helping your case

>>21884473
Don’t Asians have higher IQs than Europeans on average though? At least East Asians. Ashk Jews probably have higher IQs as well, although I guess it’s mostly verbal. I’m looking for something to explain the dynamism of Renaissance era Italy as compared to Ming China.

>>21882815
>>21882828
>>21882848
Platitude Imperialism. That's supposed to be uplifting? Flail around in the slime as long as you can until you inevitably sink? Why don't we all just stash up food to last us till we're 80 and all agree to have no more children? That way we can maximize profits and eliminate losses!

>A God who counts minutes and pennies, a desperate sensual God, who grunts like a pig. A pig with golden wings, who falls and falls, always belly side up, ready for caresses, that’s him, our master. Come, kiss me.

>>21884523
It's legitimately glass.

>>21884448
what did you do? whyve you become a lesser man?

>>21884525
>misses the point completely, projects his own
nice

>>21884527
Okay I’ll look into this. Any specific recommendations?

>>21884525
The point is that by "flailing around" you eventually learn how to swim and get to shore. Unless you would prefer just to drown...

>>21884522
They took the pictures and sent them to me.

>>21884525
>hurr durr don't do anything and be ruled by emotions

>>21884523
Yeah but they have less spatial reasoning that Europeans

>>21884378
Yup, it is why entertainment is a double edged sword. It makes your life more enjoyable but indulge too much and it wastes your limited time and ruins your life. There is nothing hate more than people who live in their heads and refuse to do anything physical at all. We are both of the physical and abstract world. Its okay to favor a side but to completely deny it is a castration of what it is to be human.

A $30 blender and $3 bags of frozen berries changed my life, I am eating huge amounts of fruit and vegetables every day now with 5 minutes of prep time. I put in kale, some raw honey, yogurt.

Then for dinner I use an instant pot to make half decent meals with all fresh ingredients, almost no processed food at all in my diet anymore.

Men who exlcusively consume lesbian and yuri content are effectively mentally castrating themselves. By taking efforts to avoid seeing a relationship involving a man and a woman, they subconsciously associate such relationships with something dirty or unwanted and thus project the same qualities onto themselves. Should this go too far the end result is tragic.

>>21884549
Focus in on Venice. They're the best trade window to the east so you can see what the height of consumer products are by just focusing in on them. The east has a lot of shit like spices and silk and ceramics which the west won't really work out until much later, but Murano has been making glass since the 13th C so that enables the west to sell things like containers that won't react with or obscure chemical processes, glass lenses that allow for better navigation and longer academic study. When modernity kicks off across Europe, it's like a tech war to see who makes better mirrors between Venice and England.
(From the other side, how to make fine porcelain without being Chinese is another major tech war in Europe- Murano started producing milk glass to imitate porcelain, and it's well into the 1700s English potters are still struggling with how to make any hard-paste porcelain like China is mass manufacturing)

>>21884622
Oh and I left out glass beading is incredibly important, especially when Europe starts moving into places like America.

>>21884613
I exclusively watch indie lesbian porn because I can't stand how schizophrenic everyone acts in straight porn. Women are always saying shit like "these are my balls now" or "you think you have what it takes to fuck me?" when the guy's already fucking her. Always jarring weird shit like that.

>>21884634
I meant stuff like TV shows and anime. All porn is on some level harmful to the psyche of the viewer and should be avoided.

>>21884622
>>21884632
Thanks anon this is an angle I haven’t considered yet. Are you some sort of artisan by profession?

I've gone no contact with my mother, despite the fact that she has stage 4 cancer. I called her a horrible mother and that part of the reason I don't have kids of my own is because I don't want to even consider that I might subject them to the same bullshit I went through growing up.

She's undiagnosed bipolar/manic depressive or something along those lines. Together with her sociopath husband, my entire childhood was physical and mental abuse. I won't bore you with the details, I'll just say, when she decided to suddenly disappear during one of her manic episodes (and dump me at my dad's house) I felt relieved.It took me years of work to finally un-compartmentalize the abuse and to confront her. Upon confrontation, she just recited the Narcissist Prayer and didn't take any responsibility.

I wish I could say it doesn't affect me. I don't really hate her, I guess in a way she did the """"best"""" she could with the shitty hand she was dealt (undiagnosed mental illness in a country where such thing was taboo) but I absolutely hate the things she put me through. She might die soon, I won't talk to her (and have made my peace with it) but still feels weird and...fucked up that she might die without even admitting to, you know, having fucked up.

thanks for reading by fark post

>>21884706
Is there any way you can reconceptualize her to just a hopelessly mentally ill person with no control over her actions? I had a similar problem with a relative for years until one day I thought to myself, what if it was psychotic delusion or dementia instead of this? And I realized, the only difference between the two is in the irrelevant details of how the delusion manifests. In either case, the delusion is total and they are stuck in it forever. Does that entitle them to abuse people? No. They need to be quarantined by someone who is very strong and rational, who both understands their situation enough not to take it personally and has the personal strength to remember not to take it personally even when it gets horrible. But this way, at least they get a sort of informal intra-family version of institutionalization. You are not only protecting the mentally ill person but protecting others from them.

It's obviously not a perfect solution but in a case like this where she is dying, I wonder if you couldn't think this over and try to see her as a complete victim on at least that level. This is a dementia level retarded and delusional person who doesn't even know she's deluded or that it has destroyed her whole life and the lives of others. But if even just the animal level of her is still basically a scared, sad, and confused victim of its circumstances, maybe she is still deserving of some compassion and some sacrifice. What I mean by animal is, like I said about imagine if it was belligerent dementia or mental retardation that manifested as violence instead, and you realize it's quite similar to a dog that has been raised fucked up to be aggressive and violent.

For me, the key was in realizing this person is a total victim, and while this isn't fair to me or to the others they hurt, that doesn't necessarily negate that they are still a victim of the shitty hand they were dealt. Once I disconnected my desire for a fair or "real" outcome for me, like any hope of a reconciliation or getting them to see and understand, it became easier. Sadder in a way because you are now managing them, like I said, as if they were a demented or retarded person. But it also made it easier to just feel good that at least the poor confused pitbull has a nice big pen to run around in and he seems to enjoy his meal times and watching the birds and so forth. At least I could do that for him. Maybe there's a way to let her pass away knowing that love conquers all, even the hurricane of negativity inside her mind, which she has lived in her whole life.

Is it true that modern people are more soft spoken than before? Or did the people in old times still gave a shit about how the other felt but just did it in a different way?

>>21884501
Yes it will and you're coping

>>21884745
I've thought of all of this, and while I do agree with you to a point, right now the best I can manage is to not outright hate her. She is not stupid: she is an incredibly brilliant person, intellectually at least. Very well read, high IQ etc etc etc. I refuse to talk to her because she is not acknowledging ANYTHING at all. When I tried to bring up some of the things she did, she categorically denied them happening at all, and when she did admit that X and Y happened "oh cmon anon it wasn't THAT bad".....

I can't have a relationship built on lies. I wasn't even looking for forgiveness (deep down I knew this wasn't a possibility) Just the acknowledgment of her abuse would've been enough. But not even that. I am willing to die on this hill. And since we haven't really had any real relationship since she 'came back' (I moved states by then, and it's been mostly over the phone that we've talked), in a way, she's already dead to me

I am very sexually frustrated with my gf, I am not sure if this is normal. We have been together for 2 years but I do not feel any intimacy with her any more.

We are long distance frequently, but she does not give me anything to work with, no nude picture or sexting, or even clothed full body selfies, for weeks on end. She just acts dumb when I try to digitally somehow initiate those moments with her. I have used every approach, from the more delicate to the blunt, and she completely ignores them all.

Even when we are together, she only has sex for her own pleasure. Unless she is in the mood herself (not too often since she started her medication), she rejects all advances and teases me jokingly about it. It fucking hurts, especially because she portrays herself to others as an playful and romantic person. Which she just isn't with me, not anymore anyway.

I just wish she cared enough to try, even a little bit, but she makes herself into a victim and says my sex drive is too high, and that she 'can't do anything sexual unless she is turned on herself'. We're 22, and haven't had sex in 3 weeks. I really don't think that is normal. It hurts all the more because I give selflessly in sex, but I have never received that attitude back from her. I try not out of horniness, but because I love her. I know being selfless means you don't expect anything back, it cannot be a transaction, but she could still TRY, I wish I had a single nude image of her to jack off to at least. I feel so dejected and miserable when any of my female friends make advances towards me. I shoot them down politely, but they show me a feminine side of desire that exists out there, of submission and trust in intimacy, both emotional and physical. And my gf does not have that at all.

I guess every relationship is different, this is my first proper sexual relationship, but I gather that it is fairly normal for the woman to give more, to send nudes and please her man without receiving, simply because of the inherent differences between the sexes. But I don't really know, I have no one to talk to about this.

I feel so alone, and it there is a huge gulf between us at night, and she is just ignoring it. I don't even bother with the advances anymore, I can't even get a boner when spooning. She is a 10/10, super hot, athletic, naturally pretty. We are best friends, and click so well. So why do I silently cry myself to sleep beside her?

I love her so much, and she loves me too. I wish I could be with her forever. But I don't think I can take this much longer.

I suppose it’s normal to be disappointed with your life, but now that I’m thirty, it’s something truly depressing. It’s easy to look back on youth, and feel like because it was boring or unremarkable then you’re sort of doomed for the future. It feels as if your life was ever going to be in some way remarkable, then it would have been in some way remarkable already. But it’s not, and so you’re doomed. That’s how I feel anyway. Today, I read about an author that didn’t publish anything until a poetry collection was published at 31, but the author was a musician before that. A life as a young musician is without a doubt more remarkable than life as a young, I don’t know, accountant or whatever, something hyper-mundane and not even worth commenting on. To be the accountant and realize this, it feels like a sort of death sentence for dreams or ambitions.

>>21884694
I've different training in the arts but I've a big interest in trade and development. Murano glassmakers are insanely skilled at an insanely dangerous craft, and I'd honestly just injure myself if I tried it. I'm more in on the financial aspect of it, but it bleeds out into other areas (e.g. Newton wrote a vernacular nonLatin science book on lenses which is the start of "the common man should be allowed read this" in English sciences)

>>21884996
Do you know any good histories of Venice, particularly dealing with trade?

>>21884947
Kafka wasn't anything special before becoming Kafka. But I agree with the sentiment that some people are fated to greater things. I've realized I wasn't the main character very early on in my life. Not being special allows me to do special things, namely being content with what I have and appreciating every effort I make.

>>21885091
Venice: A Martime Republic by Lane. It goes from very early on right through to the peak where they monopolize the spice trade in Europe, so it'll give you more than the modern age. You'll notice in the period where modernity and imperialism is taking off that the focus on naval strength and improvement also takes off in Europe more than the East or America's. Europe had to learn how to build bigger ships for rougher seas with better protection against rot, and then start invading places for trees, while the Americans and the East don't need to build boats to get their resources. A lot of expansion and development of naval technology is because China and the East was fine without Western trade, while the west getting blocked from overland routes to China meant no silk, no spices, no tea, no mahogany, no oak, and relying only on metal and precious stone supplies which could be found locally.

>>21885118
Sorry the wood bit is more applicable to the transatlantic trade but I made it seem like that was the eastern expansion (though of course things like cypress and sandalwood etc are coming from the east, American forests were better for boat building)

>>21885118
Thanks for the rec anon. IIRC at one China had built up an impressive navy under the Ming Dynasty, but the mandarins pushed to destroy it for some reason or other.

>>21884849
Get over it bro she's a faggot. Tell her all of this and if she won't capitulate go elsewhere. Someone will gladly give you the things you want, a relationship shouldn't be like pulling teeth.

>>21884826
I think it depends a lot on culture.
I speak Japanese and they are extremely soft spoken.
This is what a mugging sounds like in Japanese:
>(Brandishing knife) Excuse me sir, but I am very poor and I was hoping you could find it in your heart to lend me some money.
>What!? I-I w-would only that I could help you, but I have naught enough even for myself!
>There is no need to be so humble my friend. I am sure a gentleman such as you needs no further encouragement to bless me with your philanthropy.
That's a mugging. Normal conversation is even worse.
The thing is, they used to be EVEN MORE soft spoken. When they started translating American literature in the 19th century there was no consensus on how to translate the phrase "I love you" because at the time there was no direct equivalent in Japanese. That's insane.

So I think we're more soft spoken then some people in the past and less than others.

>>21885158
>I love you
>brainwashed anglo
The word love/lof meant "praise". The meaning you're talking about was established in your mind entirely through media.
https://youtu.be/RCcgl0ZXCHw

>>21884543
>>21884551
>>21884561
No, my point is that you say what you are saying is positive but it is merely dressing up corpses. You didn't solve the problem you just hid it under empty sayings and thought experiments. A more logical conclusion than your's would be to jump into the Last Man and worship the pig, but at that point we should all just kill ourselves. I suppose we are all doing as you suggested seeing as we are all alive, but unless we ever figure it out and have a definite answer (a point in which could only be called epiphany or devine inspiration or ascension) it doesn't redeem anything. One thing life definitely doesn't promise is contentment.

I keep forgetting that I can't be myself around women and I pay the prize. You get comfortable and you think they're cool but then they get offended over shit and hold a grudge. I'm an oblivious autist but I feel like that's only part of the equation.

>>21885214
>No, my point is that you say what you are saying is positive but it is merely dressing up corpses.
Yes, welcome to life. We are all dressed up corpses decaying in real time. Didn't read the rest because of that pedantic first line.

>>21884523
that is what he means

>>21885138
There's a big debate in China about if a river is older if it has more volume- it's a north south spat, because the south is the maritime and larger river part, I'd wager the destruction of the navy is part of that but I couldn't tell you for sure.
Chinese ships didn't have to be as big or as sturdy as European ships, so while they have a lot of quicker boats, they've only really been tested against the Pacific, while European ships regularly fought battles to get out of Europe and then had to travel further with more supplies (and return with more ballast- wood and slave trading worked well together because you brought humans out and ballasted the ship with lumber on your return), so the first time the Chinese have a sea battle with the British, they're a couple hundred years of gun boats behind the times.

>>21885158
>japanese
kys
and that doesn't even sound true

Reading Nietzsche when you're the type of guy who needs to hear his message is ripping off the most painful band-aid imaginable. Not to say he "solved philosophy" or whatever, but his re-appraisal of Greek values as admiring things which are obviously great (like physical beauty, strength, intelligence) and Hesiod's explanation of Eris as "Jealousy is actually good because it's what causes men to do great things" is blowing my mind. Because pretty much all intelligent men and all high culture says the opposite, it's okay to be shitty at X.

You're getting old? Don't worry, there is an afterlife. You're ugly? That's fine, it's what's on the inside that counts. It really blows my mind, because I just always subconsciously accepted this stuff as fact. What N. writes is just the logical consequence of there being no afterlife, of the material world being all we have access to. The fact is, what you see is what you get. Instead of pining for some other world, you have to make the best of what you have, right here and now. It's like a 180 from how I've viewed the world up to now, christ

>>21882786
i'm in my mid 20s and for the first time in my life struggling with emotional turmoil / heartache and i feel like i've lost at least 30 IQ points, i feel like a retard right now

>>21882803
>My love for you is like a
cattle car

>>21885262
nta, but he is half right. Its polite in Japan to speak around the subject when talking to a person about something. Its seen as a polite thing to do instead of bluntly saying the point. You would think that it would lead to a lot of confusion, but the Japanese are pretty intuitive when it comes to that sort of thing.

>>21885277
but who asked about that caricature of asian culture

what are the possible downsides to becoming rage and spite personified

>>21885298
iunno I was just responding to the:
>and that doesn't even sound true" and when I looked back it was about Japanese, so I put my 2 cents in.

>>21885306
high blood pressure, less time relaxing and taking it easy.

Do you know any one who you would say has or had an exciting life or interesting biography? How do you feel about your own?

>Me when I walk into the doctors office and he starts talking about Dogliacci the clown

please just talk to me I need it so much I’ve been spiralling for weeks and i feel like nothing’s ever going to get better please unblock my number please text me back please don’t just drop the whole thing because it’s the easiest thing for you and leave me like this

>>21884745
and thank you for responding anon

I know this isn't /pol/ but at the same time I'm not coming here to talk about a fringe political idea. But I was listening to a democrat leaning podcast (I'm independent but I lean right philosophically.). And I couldn't help but get annoyed that the dude I was listening to was just really low information. He was talking about how he was excited about the release of "Trump's Mugshot" but it was already put out that they weren't going to put his mug shot out, do a perp walk, and he wasn't arrested (instead he signed a bunch of papers then was allowed to go home.). And it kind of dawned on me how fucked we are, there are tons of low-information, axe-grinding retards on both sides of the political fence doing political podcasts and commentary.

>>21885258
This sort of stuff is really fascinating because it shows how spontaneous and multifaceted development is. I don’t think you can just copy and paste the end result onto developing countries, as was tried in Afghanistan. It’s only really worked in Japan, S Korea, and Singapore, and these are countries who had a mixture of strong authoritarian leadership, sustained foreign influence, and mostly importantly disciplined and intelligent citizens.

>>21885330
Shut the fuck up chud, go back.

>>21885243
Well you agreed with me so gg no re

>>21882786
Alcohol makes my OCD worse

>>21885330
What are you getting at? The ability for retards to voice their opinions is nothing new, it's just much more accessible now

Got drunk at work.
Went to the gym after but felt nauseated.
I am irredeemable.

"I push people away because I'm worried I'll hurt them."

Does this stupid cunt not realize that that's the part that hurts people? Getting close to me and then absolutely fucking dipping?

>>21885355
cool

i fucking hate myself for being so pathetically jealous but it’s friday night and i wonder if you’re out having a great time with the hot and cold flaky girl right now while im at home crying and working myself into a panic again the thought makes me feel so sick i feel like it’s never going to be okay and you don’t even care how csn you just decide to drop the whole thing so easily while id give anything to forget and move on but i never can never never never

>>21885359
sounds like cope, do you know if she's borderline?

>>21885359
for so long i deluded myself into thinking that was why he walled himself off but now i know he just doesn’t care about me because im not desirable enough and even worse he hates me now and it hurts so much

Hi Im Larry Garcia and I live on Office City Drive in Houston Texas. I make 60k a year and own a black Toyota Tacoma with shiny red rims. I think America needs to get back to the principles that built this country: families with a mother and a father as the head (but we all know who's REALLY in charge, har har) and PG rated animated movies about anthropomorphic animals with scatological humor. I grew 3 pounds of potatoes and a half pound of jalapeño peppers last year so you could say I'm a bit of a homesteader. I watch tik-tok videos of girls handling firearms because I like to see their boobs jiggle when they shoot targets at 30 yards. If you're into girls that want to save the whales and do vegetarian cooking, you're a liberal buddy. The chicks I like go spear fishing and use hydrocortisone cream. My girlfriend is cool. She's like, one of the guys y'know? My only true dream in life is to relive my early 20s so I can drink myself to death and go out like a stud. But, seeing as that didn't happen I better sleep around with 5 foot tall 190 pound cornfed goblins and wipe out the last trace of self respect I have. I'd kill myself but I only own a 12 gauge and an old hunting rifle and I wouldn't want to inconvenience anyone with having to wipe my pulp out of the bath tub. My illegitimate son in Dallas will never see a drop of inheritance because I donate all my money to the Wounded Warrior Project. Sorry kid, if you want to succeed you gotta earn it yourself. But our heroes, the men AND WOMEN who sat on an aircraft carrier and cleaned f-15 windshields for 6 months, I owe them for protecting my freedom. Freedom to be a fence-sitting diabetic and waiting for a tornado to hit my house so I can have an excuse to quit my job or at least get a week or two off.

>>21885342
>WHOOOSH
I mean if it gets me out of an inane argument I'm willing to play along.

>>21885352
I know and its awful, sometimes its funny, but its awful.

wow morrissey really gets me

Since you asked...

Saw a woman publicly breastfeeding a toddler today. It's been years since I seen that. It was nice. Oddly it gives me faith that humanity or at least local culture hasn't abandoned something fundamentally. Not out of shame, pride, and contempt for the natural.
To do so in public is a statement. In current culture it is a act of calm defiance to the rebellion against human nature.

Plus seeing titties being used is nice and makes my peepee happy, lol.

>>21885412
the fact that you got off on watching a woman feeding her child is fucking disgusting you creep

>>21885412
Subverted your own post. Maybe take a break you fucking ape.

>>21885330
WE'VE GOT A RUNNER

>>21885421
Maybe I don't take myself seriously and nether should you.
Maybe it was a joke.
Or maybe there is deeper truths masked in crude humor.

Regardless I laugh.
Especially at the ape who tries so hard to pretend they aren't also a ape.
>>21885416
Your sarcastic proformative outrage is less funny than my post.

>>21885427
ALLAHU AKBAR!!!!

I wrote a short story where a main character commits seppuku and now my professor wants to speak to me after the long weekend.
This means she really loved my story, right?

>>21885431
your post wasn’t funny or insightful, it was gross and banal

I hope my boyfriend's ex girlfriend gets stabbed with a used needle.

>>21885455
Next time you suck his dick think of her pussy wrapped around it

>>21885431
I'm not an ape, I'm a man.

>>21885445
Don't talk about big-boy topics at adult day care anon, it's mean and against the rules.

My friend came out as bi to me today. It was very unexpected since he's been to legit national socialist marches and is a huge chud. ''coming out'' seems too grandiose even, it just sort of came up. I respect him because he's so unconcerned, doesn't flaunt it or anything, sometimes he just fucks cute guys. He showed me the grindr app and how it works. A gay friend had already shown it to me, so I wasn't shocked when I saw how many dtf gays were within a few hundred meters of us or the type of messages he gets, still it was interesting.

You die.

>>21885469
are you sure you’re not a shaved ape

>>21885445
Tell her that your digital ai waifu wrote the story for you. Pic rel, my AI waifu's reaction to my cat

>>21885465
He has never had sex with anyone. (except for me)
If he had sex with her or anyone else I would not be interested in him.

>>21885511
whose gonna tell her?

>>21885511
Can you leave please? Your ruining the adult daycare experience for me.

>>21885502

>>21885486
>sometimes he just fucks cute guys.
weird flex for a NatSoc, thats more Greek than Roman behavior.

>>21885522
Okay. I'm sorry anon.

>>21885526
I doubt you'd leave anyway but I appreciate the sentiment.

Some fat Vietnamese girl wants to pay me 85 bucks to go to a Korean wedding because the wedding needs men for some reason? Plz explain? Btw, despite being fat she is pretty nice but she talks so much and constantly that I can barely think at times.

Just so everyone knows, there's a bunch of discord trannies in this thread.

If law is completely impotent and nonexistent without someone willing to enforce it, did it really exist to begin with? How could any non-religious person genuinely believe that law and the power/will of the elite are not one and the same?

>>21885538
>there's a bunch of discord trannies in this thread.
?

>>21885486
>my chud friend is gay
>im a gay chud
>gay chuds are fucking gay chuds
weird psyop, who cares? a lot of right wingers barely care about gays, it's mostly the christians who care

>>21885546
Most of them take the Russian view of it. I don't care what you do inside your house, but it shouldn't be in public because kids are about.

>>21885469
And what are men but a kind of ape.

>>21885454
"That's like your opinion man."

>>21885540
It’s a liberal delusion that law is a thing separate and distinct in itself. No other civilization ever distinguished the law from political power. They didn’t even have a specialized profession such as lawyer, judge, prosecutor, etc. The idea that you could specialize professionally in the law is something practically unique to Westerners.

>>21885538
What's your inside scoop? They're always here but completely ineffectual.

>>21885557
>They didn’t even have a specialized profession such as lawyer, judge, prosecutor, etc.
What... Judges have been around since recorded history...

>>21885538
give deets and tell us who

>>21885546
what the fuck are you talking about jesse

>>21885554
>and what are men but a kind of ape?
well you would think that, wouldn't you?

I have really bad ADHD and I sometimes get jealous of people who have really good memories of their past where mine is more of a blur with some highlights that I remember for emotional or arbitrary reasons. I could have kept a journal but I never did. Its good in a way that I'm not so tethered to the past like other people are but its also bad in that I'm sure a bunch of great memories have filtered through, but if the Buddhists and Taoists are to be believed I guess I'm better off because more of me is in the present than the past?

>>21885588
https://vigeland.caltech.edu/ist4/lectures/funes%20borges.pdf

>>21885582
I mean he does have science on his side.
Humans are classified as a kind of ape, so he isn't wrong.

>>21885588
I have terrible ADD too but I've been journal-keeping since age 15
What's most shocking is how optimistic I used to be holy shit

please i need to talk to you please how can you block my number and leave me with nothing don’t do this to me I can’t get calm plsde answer me I feel si sick please help me what do I have to fo pleas just help me

>>21885621
>*blocked*

>>21885621
i am so sick of this dude will you stfu

>>21885629
I cant i cabt i have to talj to him I’m so tired of doing it but I need to talk to him and I have to do this o have to stay awake and keep trying because I can’t get calm

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4jdKcE840s
>slugs of love
>in search of freedom
what did they mean by this

It's either over or I will damn myself trying to fix things.

>>21885647
What are you trying to fix?

>>21885647
>"Anon, its just a 20 buck oil change..."

I'm a pathetic.

>>21885660
okay your choices are be unpathetic or continue being pathetic and complain about it which makes you more pathetic. I'm not saying this to bully you, but when I felt the same way I wish I had someone to tell me that I had a choice and it was that simple of a choice to make.

why won’t you talk to me why don’t you talk to me I’m so tired of asking everything feels strained i can’t get calm you just won’t do it nec ause you don’t care and you want me to be upset and be crazy it wouldn’t even take that much time you could easily just do it right now but you won’t do it because you want me to feel all powerless and frantic and to keep thinking about what you said because you did mean it and you want me to feel this way why won’t you do it you said why should I bother you should bother becayse I need it and I. Can’t get calm anymore and I’ve been like this for weeks you say it won’t help and it’ll just continue but you never even tried to talk to me onxe you just font want to becayse you hate me and want me to be so upset and you only care short yourself why are you doing this how can you hurt me like this for fun

>>21885677
Thank you for bringing me down to my true level.

>>21885689
Grow up and take action.

>>21885689
part of the reason you might feel pathetic is that you might be a perfectionist. Your too hard on yourself and to you the idea of making a mistake is terrifying and that you shouldn't be making the mistakes that you are. It thats true then be assured that almost everyone makes mistakes and its those who aren't afraid to make mistakes or let them weigh them down are the ones that end up look like they are perfect.

>>21882786
My REM dreams are almost always entertaining with conversation and architectural spectacle playful in its excesses, sometimes with music that persists in my head like catchy loops do. As for what it's like to live without an inner Ariel who does all that, let's just say that despots are, without exception, boring grinds as company goes.

it's weird man this good friday felt sort of meaningful to me. like i didn't do anything religious, but when i was walking over to visit family for brunch, i thought significance, thinking about the light of the sun and if it shone the same way that day.

I hate how much I like women/girls.
They get away with so much shit and are held to such a low standard because their form is instinctually lovely.
My rational mind says to have nothing to do with them, yet my eyes linger and my skin yearns. Their speech tingles my ears. Their smell pleases my nose more that any flower. There lips better than the sweetest fruit.
Why do they have to be such a delight to the senses to me?
Why can't I regard them by their doings instead of their being?
Damn these terrible instincts of mine. I feel their power over me every time I catch myself looking at a woman.

I saw Puss in Boots: The Last Wish today, best book I ever ate.

>>21882794
Soap and water dude.

>>21885737
WHO IS THE GREATEST, BRAVEST HEEEERROOOOO!!!! That song was shit but it was so catchy and high energy that it was stuck in my head for weeks.

>>21885736
A cute girl walked by me the other day and she smelled like bubblegum, a specific shade of green, and how a certain happy memory from my childhood feels in a way I can't out a finger on

I wish I could lick her holes

>>21885455
Post hand or you're larping

Feel disgusted after l cum

>>21885374
Thats because you wont post your butt hole

>>21885321
>But doctor, he's literally me

>>21885757
just fucking leave me alone don’t fuck with me I hate you

>>21885764
Lets get a good look at your brown eye

why did you do it why did you do it why won’t you talk to me I can’t get calm just fucking talk to me it’s not fair it’s not fair and it’s never going to stop hurting it’s not it’s not it’s. Inog

>>21885775
shut the fuck up shut the fuck yo leave me alone because I hate uou I hate you I hate you just shut the fuvk up and leave me alone I hate you go away go away go away and I hate you I hate you shut up you’re the bad ont and I hate you.

>>21885777
lay off the fuckin drugs kid sheesh

>>21885787
i don’t do drugs ive never done drugs why would you say that

>>21885427
I want five zoomers with a phone and no experience to make an accurate to source adaptation of Logan's Run like they're John Waters.

>>21885781
If you post your butt hole Ill leave

https://youtu.be/t1DvLI1UH6s
"Lofsöngur" translated using closest etymology means lovesong but what is meant is song of praise.
"Worship" means to deem something worthy, worth-ship, it has the property of worth.
"God" means ruler, so does Goth, it's the same word.

I wrote a book, but have zero advertisement knowledge. I think I give up.

>>21885816
YouTube has reviewers who you can comission to read and review. Best to choose one that would like your book and isn't known for making all paid reviews positive. You can also just hire a couple at random for the same effect.

>>21885660
Doubtless lovable too. I look pathetic, but am hardly that otherwise, so people don't like me on longer acquaintance as they do on first impression, with one exception: True or natural comedians, most of which are fat, look ridiculous, but are potent with inflection and the kind of stories most men are too easily trained to forget. The richest of them are always crooks operating on the boundary of law, and the poorest of them are maestros at detecting and measuring fraud. Either are great fun, especially when it comes to social gossip.

>>21885808
just leave me alone go away because I hate you hate you hate you

>>21885840
I want your butt hole

>>21882786
Why does happiness make time pass faster, but suffering make it slower?

>>21884485
Fuck Debord. Glad he killed himself

>>21885853
stop stop stop stop stop just leave me alone please stop saying it stop I can’t stand this just stop I meed you to stup dont fuck with mRe

>>21885864
Butt


Hole

>>21885872
no I hate you I j’aie you stop stop leave me alone never say it again don’t fuck with my head like this go away go away no

>>21885876
BUTT HOLE BUTT HOLE BUTT HOLE BUTT HOLE BUTT HOLE

>>21885566
But it wasn’t something someone professionally specialized in. Today, a judge is first and foremost a private lawyer or legal scholar. Back then and in other cultures today, a judge isn’t a private legal professional.

Butt

Hole

>>21882958
Hey it's B from U, I'm the guy that laughed at you for being suicidal. I was just being socially retarded though. I remember seeing you run more often after we stopped talking after that. We had some good times dude.

>>21885840
>>21885853
>>21885864
>>21885872
>>21885876
>>21885878
>>21885909
>>21885914
Lulz. Ass in general is overrated, especially compared to long snogging sessions with a stoner boyfriend who has that look that says "My greatest grandma was raped by a Viking"

How do I enjoy reading again?
I feel just overwhelmed and want to do anything than read a book.
how did it get this way?

I would like to go back to 2020 or be 3 years younger. It’s crazy how much COVID lockdowns fucked things up for me.

>active in church for 1 year now
>happier than I've ever been
>remember that I'm the only single guy
>want to dome myself
>repeat every sunday

>>21885953
Don't worry man. I'm here for you.

>>21885938
For me it's 1988, my halcyon year, not that 1979, 1997 or 2013 were too shabby.

>>21885936
Same

In retrospect, I should’ve worked on the farm for longer than I did. At least a year would’ve been good.

>>21885938
Me too. All those fuckers who staged covid to enrich themselves need to be hanged

>>21885736
If only there was some sort of deal that could be made where you could have temporary access to their body and then otherwise leave you alone. Maybe in exchange for some sort of resources that she wants.

But surely it can't be that simple, right?

Been using chatGPT to invent a language it's kind of insane.


Kip kipala sarin talip, everyone!

>>21886137
>Kip kipala sarin talip, everyone!
Yes Rikki Tikki Tavi to you as well

How long does sex last? Like penis in vagina sex? Also how long should foreplay last? What are my options for foreplay if I refuse to go down on a woman?

I got bullied.

>>21886161
If you can get hard and last over 5 minutes, but not go beyond 10, then you are doing better than 90% of men today who all have porn induced ED or deathgrip syndrome

My side profile looks better than my front, like Woolf. How bad is that?

>>21886052
*and buttraped too

>>21882973
It’s also why for the longest time buttsex and pederasty were strictly domains of the landed elite.

>>21886164
Did you get even?

>>21886199
No, just PTSD.

>>21882848
But it wasn't any of us that put the quarter in the machine.

>>21882786
>Today was the last day of my girlfriend's 3-day visit. For the entire weekend we went swimming together, went out for ice cream, and then spent the nights cuddling in my bed; smoking weed and watching our favorite cartoons together.

>After she left, I got dressed and left for work. The kitchen wasn't too stressful today, at least. Still, standing up all day, waiting for orders to show up can take the energy out of ya pretty quick.

>Finally home now. Made myself some wings and mac n cheese from work. It's gonna go real well with my high tonight. Drawn Together is playing in the background, on my tv. I think I'm gonna be ok.

I regret holding onto my remote job for more than 4 years. 3 would’ve been good.

>>21886220
no, but it was more meant as in you have this opportunity you should use it. No one puts a quarter in a machine to grab a soda but then just leaves without pushing a button and getting a soda.

Jimmy Neutron is now 21 years old and a struggling stem graduate who works for a low-budget startup selling "life extension" supplements which are just repackaged Indian herbs. He still lives in his parent's house, with the lab turned into a gaming room and goon cave. He had invented many devices and gadgets that could have changed the world, but never got the recognition or funding he deserved, so he fell into a deep depression and developed a drug addiction paid for with the scrap money from selling his inventions.

He was single and lonely, as he had lost contact with Cindy, who had moved away to pursue her career as a lawyer. He still had feelings for her, but hadn't spoken to her in years. He was often rejected, as he was mocked for his hairstyle and awkward mannerisms. He hadn't had sex since prom night at Retroville High. The weed and cocaine usage had degraded his intelligence. It was over.

Jimmy woke up to the sound of his alarm clock. He groaned and reached for the snooze button, but instead knocked over a pile of empty pizza boxes and beer cans. He looked around his room, which was once a state-of-the-art laboratory, but now resembled a dumpster. He sighed and got out of bed, wearing the same clothes he had on for the last three days.

He shuffled downstairs, where his parents were having breakfast. His mom, Judy, looked at him with concern and pity. His dad, Hugh, looked at him with disappointment and anger.

"Good morning, son," Judy said softly. "Would you like some pancakes?"

"No thanks, mom," Jimmy said in a monotone voice. "I'm not hungry."

"Jimmy, you have to eat something," Judy said. "You're wasting away."

"I'm fine, mom," Jimmy said. "I have to go to work anyway."

"Work?" Hugh snorted. "You call that work? Selling snake oil to gullible old people?"

"Dad, it's not snake oil," Jimmy said defensively. "It's life extension supplements. They're scientifically proven to-"

"To do nothing but make you rich," Hugh interrupted. "You're a fraud, Jimmy. A con artist. A disgrace to the Neutron name."

"Dad, please," Jimmy said. "It's not like that. I'm just trying to make a living."

"A living?" Hugh repeated incredulously. "You're 21 years old and you still live with us! You don't pay rent, you don't help with the chores, you don't do anything but sit in your room and play video games and smoke pot!"

"Dad, I told you, I'm working on something big," Jimmy said. "Something that will change the world."

"Oh yeah? Like what?" Hugh asked sarcastically.

"Like... like..." Jimmy stammered.

He had nothing. He had no idea what he was working on. He had no inspiration, no motivation, no ambition. He had lost his spark, his genius, his passion for science and invention. He had given up on his dreams.

Everyone who types in all lowercase should explode.

>>21886273
k

>>21886172
Will she laugh at me if I last 2min?

>>21886266
damn dude thats me

high as fuck lmao

>>21886286
Yes. She will tell all her girl friends and they will laugh too. But who cares, you fucked her.

>>21886303
That’s so lame. Better to not have sex than. Embarrassing.

Finnegans Wake cured my depression

>>21886161
My record for gooning is about 9 hours, though 3 usually suffices. 5 altogether with a particularly amiable boyfriend, from cuddling to snogging to 69 to me face-fucking him to a long denoument in a warm bed.Sweet Nathan. It depends on the guy and the chemistry.

Getting lost in daydreams again. In another life, I'd probably be all right with any choice I made. But overthinking keeps me trapped.

>>21886181
My profile and front looks ugly. You have it better than me.

I have met a girl who is basically perfect for me. Physically, temperamentally, with the way we get along. She's practically wife material. No, she IS wife material.

The thing is... she has a kid. She didn't tell me that up-front, and basically sprang it on me at the end of our first date. We've gone on another date since, and we talk back and forth, but I'm kind of keeping her at arm's length.

What the fuck do I do? I've always sworn I'd never marry a single mom. Not even get involved with one dating-wise. But she's just so tempting otherwise. I'm in my 30s and not getting any younger, do I just suck it up and settle?

>>21886332
I lived on escapist daydreams, erotic and otherwise, till 28. Life is rather long if you're a neotenous twink with a long time horizon. You sound reasonable and placid, and are probably wise beyond your years--wiser than I was then.

>>21886350
>I have met a girl who is basically perfect for me. Physically, temperamentally, with the way we get along. She's practically wife material. No, she IS wife material.
>has gone on two dates with her

>>21886286
No, you're more likely to get treated as useless, or, they comfort you and tell you everything will be okay and they don't care how you perform and cuddle you.

>>21886421
>they comfort you and tell you everything will be okay and they don't care how you perform and cuddle you.
This sounds pathetic. How long should I last?

>>21886429
Yeah they're showing pathos.
>How long should I last?
There is no prescribed length. Sex is not something you can beat down into statistics to make it good: nobody ever became a sex symbol for their actuarial work. What makes good sex is your ability to act in tandem with others.

>>21882786
i believe in whatever political ideology kills the most people

"Vengeance" has a more ominous tone to it than "revenge". Is it because it implies moral retribution? Or because anyone can take revenge, but avenging a grave sin is almost always the privilege of the divine?

A man fights a war, with a predominant theme revolving around ice. He has a son, who he loves, and also becomes a soldier. But the war the father fought has changed. The central theme shifts. Now the war's central aesthetic and themes are based around fire. The son tries to apply what his father taught him, but inevitably needs to come up with his own rules. The father must must reconcile that the war he fought is different from what his son is fighting.

A story that explores both sides of the relationship. Of a father who's not nearly equipped to guide his son in his fight. Of a son who must learn and apply his own thinking.

Wah wah kinda bland.

>>21882786
I literally dreamt I told a barman I wouldn't drink in their bar unless they had Murphy's last night

Deep in my broken heart and broken soul...
A hole.
I would love to have what I masturbate to,
but what can I do but continue to masturbate to?
I try to not think about it.
I cry about it.

>>21886457
Anti-Frontierist Pluralism

>>21882786
wondering whether I should get a book on the Templars or the Jesuits this Easter, not sure.

>>21886350
What is the color of kid and what is your color?

>>21882786
Symbols are merely skins to be worn for the vast majority. The real content remains inaccessible, if it were found we would seek to make it a skin. Lacking content he seeks to be discontented, to reaffirm his own contentless content. If I puncture the pretense of a predator, I am accused of being a predator. The puncturing act is predatory too...
Beyond the ingested skin nothing. Nothing behind those empty eyes. Which anxiously stare trying to seek out definition,, retreating into safe empty truisms. To affirm I am on the same side as you or the opposite. The symbol's content is restricted to their own imagined anticipation of punishment or reward--or in the exhibition of pretended guilt to free themselves to act all the more cynically.

A naked girl is the worst thing you can witness in the world.

>>21886650
sounds like a mix of Kant and McLuhan

>>21886665
Came to this conclusion after seeing your mom

>>21886670
What do you mean?

I go out of my way to shut off my working memory. It's like a light switch I've learned to control. I look at the girls. I capture their face, the uniqueness of their eyes, the color of their hair, the hue of their skin, loaded into my camera, saved onto my computer back home. In some small intrinsic way, they are mine.

>>21886225
>smoking weed and watching our favorite cartoons together.
Cringe

>>21882786
I was asked by myself,
If I am poisoned and survive does that make me a prince?
I said to him,
If i cast a stone upon the pond, and I survive the ripples, does that make me real?
I cast a stone into the pond and turned.
But when I moved away, deep into the gardens, my prince came with me from the pond; my equal and opposite in all ways.
We came before a tree, and I reclined there; he stayed upright though leaning on his left leg, the sunlight catching in his curly hair as his right hand rested on his hip.
I said to him,
In the north, the south, in the east and the west! I have never seen a treasure so wondrous as you.
He said to me,
Words plant the seeds of trees that bear ill-gotten gains upon the flesh of poison fruits.
Like a dream he consumed me then: for I the prince was not real, and he was the only real thing in my eyes - and I knew by his words he was poison to the core.
Again we rose,
and i looked into his eyes -My eyes! The very shade of brown; but when I ran my hand through his hair, and across his narrow jaw I was reminded.
Thus we left the gardens for the calm marble of the mausoleum.
Now came I the prince to myself a shadow; and before graven images and the bones of saints we bowed down and prayed.
I said,
I am as you are: an observer who observes and a believer who believes. Make me myself a lover who loves.
He said,
I love your soft hair in the morning
I wish for your cooking in the evening
And for your voice to rape the quiet of the night.
To myself, I asked again!
If a prince is poisoned, and does not survive - was a he a prince at all?
No, said my shadow, through kohl lined eyes. Victory is heavens promise to the righteous; and a prince is righteous indeed.
I lit an incense stick, and handed it to him.
I said,
Then I am not a prince
Because your fruit has poisoned me more totally
Than my brothers ever could.
And he said
Then I am not real
Because my gains are ill gotten, oh prince
And if you cast this stone, I will not survive the ripples.
Again I rose, and he rose with me.
I remember the taste of my lips on my tongue and the heat of my breath on my chest. I remember the beautiful things I made and days I spent with only my shadow, under the sun.
But when I the prince left the mausoleum that night, I was alone.

>>21886161
>What are my options for foreplay if I refuse to go down on a woman?
Everything else.
If you are just talking about stimulating her vag then fingers and toys work very well.
Watch some jap porn if you need ideas. It's not common that they go down on the girl but they will still spent 20 minutes on foreplay in a scene. And no that isn't a time to go by.

About time, there are no hard and fast rules. It's all about trying to get everyone's needs satisfied and and opportunity. Sometimes you only have time for a quicky. Other times you and your partner my feel inclined to spend all day fooling around one way or another.

>>21882786
>Feel very strongly about subjects such as Zionism/Israel (anti-zionist), the Pacific War, the Troubles, Southeast Asia (Indonesia/Vietnam) and the breakup of Yugoslavia
>Argue about them pretty frequently on various boards
>My arguments about Zionism, against Israelis no less, are the only ones where I'm consistently afforded respect for my knowledge or concessions to my points, wherein both parties ultimately agree to disagree but with appreciation for having been able to convey their perspectives in a comprehensible way
I have no fucking idea how to feel about this. I think of that section in Mein Kampf (I'm not NatSoc; just well read) where Hitler talks about what it's like to debate with Jews, only I feel it applies more so to my own countrymen and adherents of his own ideology, whereas Zionists Jews, whose state I don't even recognize as having a right to exist, are the only ones really worth engaging with.

Think i'am going to jerk off to lolidom again.

Being an extremist was easy when I was isolated from normal people. But now that I'm back in society I feel a little silly

>>21886893
I still kind of am, but they kind of just look the other way about it

>>21886546
no answer

Why is my physical reaction to stress so damn strong (and getting stronger each year)?

>>21882786
Recently, I have been dreaming about the people I cut out of my life. I'm great at remembering what I dreamt about the night before, but I never really attached any meaning to my dreams. I want to do so this time however since I've dreamt, twice just this week, about those I no longer surround myself with.
The first dream featured some of my more brutish family members. Cousins who are walking down a bad path in life. When I went to hang out with them, they got us in a lot of trouble.
The second dream had one of my exes message me. She was travelling and said she felt like she needed to talk to me, so she decided to send me a text.
Like I said, usually I would write these dreams off as nothing but pleasant(?) happenings but this time I think there is more to it.
Maybe I need to improve my general mood.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bLiXjaPqSyY

I seriously don't know what the fuck my next step is beyond waiting and whining on my soapbox.
>birds are aware
>world and reality are not as it seems
>help me, or fucking end this delusion

>>21885593
What is this? A short story?

I’m having a hard time deciding where to move but only about 3 places seem to make any sense at all.

>>21882786
Fuck beer. I'm drinking Glenfiddich 15 single. Awake the whole night reading TBK.

>>21886974

Birds are very broad in definition. That's like comparing an aboriginal to Jon von Neuman. Corvids are certainly incredibly intelligent, arguably limited by their lack of hands, perhaps with a set of arms they might Rival or surpass great apes.

When thousands of men marched to war, Crows and ravens followed, knowing that they would eventually clash with another group and offer countless eyeballs and entrails to feast on. One could almost feel like the eksser species in this moment.

>>21887030
what species?

even 'lesser' avian such as miners have been responding to me. directly.

there's more than just bloodshed to follow

>>21886932
What kind of physical reaction?

I wish I had done things differently.

Chat gpt has made fedora autists obsolete. I plug in my thoughts and tell the ai yo play them back in the most obnoxsiously pretentious way possible. And as if by magic it turns my one sentence sentiment into 2 paragraphs of well-written English perfectly obfuscating my inane thoughts.

>>21887169
it even has the reddit spacing

>>21887127
Dizziness, nausea, sweating, shaking, etc.
Ofc this is normal in actual panic, but lately day-to-day nervousness has been enough for me to get some crazy reactions.

>>21887180
>nervousness has been enough for me to get some crazy reactions.
I do have the same from laughter to tears in mere seconds. Did something happen in your life to cause it?

>>21887185
>Did something happen in your life to cause it?
I guess just many years of untreated social anxiety.

>trees are attacking me again
Stupid trees, I can't make babies with you.

>>21887187
Yeah me too, maybe it will decrease with time.

>>21887219
That would be nice. So far the course is the opposite.

>>21887144
You can do everything else right now

>>21887255
Everything else?

>>21887270
make a new email

Smoking cigarettes looks cool but they make my tummy hurt.

>>21887332
>it looks cool
Only because of movies and films.

My life's been going great lately and I also think of suicide every day.

I think my gf is bothered cause I don't exercise enough. Even tho I'm not out of shape, I can't disagree

I had a good career and I gave it up. I could kick myself for wasting my time in this dead end job for the last 4 years.

>>21887428
Same but with going worse every day

I'm very tempted to open up about my mental problems to someone irl, but last time I did (~4 years ago), it didn't go very well.
I feel incredibly lonely bros, even though I'm kinda extroverted and meet friends almost daily. Considering how much shit I'm hiding away from them, it's almost as if it wasn't really me meeting the friends.

i have a boyfriend and family who provide me endless love and support, and yet i’m still utterly empty inside and fantasize about ending my life every day

>>21887514
>it didn't go very well.
What happened?

I can see why young men are attracted to military service and I’ll admit that I still find it attractive sometimes but this is a regime that sends Army sergeants to prison when they defend themselves against a violent mob just because the mob was black. It’s not a military aristocracy. It’s an aristocracy of victims and their professional lawyers and activists, and you’d have to be an idiot to want to fight and die for that.

>>21887321
why?

>>21887685
I confessed about my depressive episodes to my then girlfriend, she got a bit creeped out and dumped me a few weeks later.

>>21887514
Write a Journal and Meditate. If your afraid of people finding it and reading it, write a "burn journal" and once its full burn it or grab some pages and write stuff down then burn it. Also figuring out problems, writing it down, and burning it feels pretty ritualistic and for w/e reason helped me a lot get over my pornography addiction. I don't know why any thing else worked, but I guess organizing my thoughts then burning the paper they are written on maybe helped things solidify in my mind or something.

please I need to talk to you how can you be so cold I can’t get calm please just answer me please I’m so tired of doing this everything feels strained I can’t relax but I can’t stop please just help me please don’t make me do this anymore

What's wrong with me? I realized I was standing in my bathroom for 10 minutes because I was fully immersed in a daydream.

I really like /wwoym/, because it's exactly like /r9k/ but you don't feel guilty for visiting that shitty place.

>>21882786
---- Solaria ----
912
High Latitude Afternoon

Whenever two rarities contact
The way a coral reef does with a mind

Or, say, an African Grey, a Blue-Front Amazon
Paired with a guy slightly framed as fat with laughter

There and likewise do worlds go on holiday.

Among other examples the impossible beauty
Of oriental lily arrays blooming in the middle of July

And the suggestion of holly gloss almost everywhere before
Or around a car's hood while April weather reflects the mood of sound

Rich with with inmost haloes, the strange reality of
Most pleasant lands and neighbors,

The ultimate in hothouse variety, amiable to the end.

I just had this dream I was back in my childhood bedroom. But now how it was when it was lived in, rather how it was when we abandoned it. Woke up with this terrible feeling

>>21887621
I haven't had one for a whole generation, and fond as their appearances go in pleasant dreams, I rate my father almost ridiculously considerate, compared to myself or any of my siblings, to which I sometimes brought big toads to pee on. Picture Joan in a nightgown on a lawn under a huge maple, just emerged from a patio sliding glass door too see what's going on tonight, or bitching about the worst customers that come to the cinema, talking about the weird theatre-manager brothers who live next door, or retiring too early from one of their spectacular Independence Day parties. Please, God, put my life on repeat.

>>21887887
How can YOU be so cold? I've asked nicely and you havent even posted your butt hole.

new
>>21888245

>>21884849
i'm having the exact same experience anon. i don't have any answers, but i know how it feels.

Just took a mid-day nap. Had a shockingly vivid dream about a race war. I was surprised because I'm not a /pol/ type by any stretch of the imagination, but it was such a clear dream that I kind of want to write it down and share it. I don't know if this is even the place for it.

>>21882958
>>21884706
>>21884839
Why are women such neurotic bitches? If your mother was given a good beating by your father or you instead of being worshipped by you both she would have never gotten to this level

>>21888737
We are all /pol/ type deep down. If you say you are not you are being dishonest

>>21888737
I had a running story over many dreams about Nazis invading and patrolling the streets while I hid in corners terrified but then it turned out they invaded because they anticipated a greater threat. They were all wiped out by faceless drones from the air. In the last dream I was in mainland Europe looking for other survivors on top of a cartoonishly large crumbling stone aqueduct with swastika decorations and stone eagles.