/lit/ - Literature

Im a wizard.

Just had a minor traffic incident and all parties involved are getting a big stick up their ass about insurance claims

Why don't you lift weights, anon? It has zero downsides.

>>21813683
I have no money for gym.

>https://www.theamericanconservative.com/the-war-by-women/
Glad to see that theres finally pushback against the gays.

>>21813688
>>21813683
I am lifting my books.

>>21813647
Is there a greatest compliment than someone willing to kill you? For a short moment, you become their everything. They are willing to put their own lives and freedom on the line for the sole purpose of ending your existence. You are judged important, more important than everything else. You will live on in their hearts for years and years and years. I am a misogynist but if I had to choose I wouldn't mind being strangled and having my lips bitten and my face slapped by a cute woman wearing nail polish. This kind of death resonates much more with me than dying in a car accident or in a war fighting for globohomos.

>>21813683
It takes time out of my day that I could spend watching anime.

Does the average woman really fuck a new guy every other month? Surely thats just an outlier.

>>21814129
the average body count for women 18-25 is like 3-7 in most studies

>>21814129
Yeah. That’s not the average woman. That’s the average pornstar.

>>21814147
Okay, still a little high but understandable

>>21814154
probably self-reported. the real number is the number they say, squared

>>21814147
*2-3
Rare occasions you get the 4-6. The sex worker is not an average woman, so seven men is quite rare and found only in a handful of swingers who are cool with orgies.

>>21814161

>>21814154
not to mention that 3 people means your ability to bind is already beyond repair lol
statistics don't give a fuck about feelings

For the last few weeks I've not been drinking. I am not an alcoholic, however, I wanted to try not drinking for a while.
I did a similar thing last year, and it was great.
But this time, I don't know. The health benefits aren't that great, and I found that having a drink during the evening was making me more relaxed and able to spend more quality time with my loved ones.
Lately I've been feeling bitter and stressed out, it's not linked to the fact that I don't drink, it's mostly that my life ain't so easy these days.

It's just that, while I pictured alcohol as a vice, now I suppose I see it more like a tool, with pros and cons. I guess I would have an easier time if I was drinking. But then again, I usually feel like a piece of shit after drinking.
I need to have a more healthy relationship to the substance, I suppose.

>>21813955
Based

>>21814169
>bind
Kek

>>21814166
Not from my experience. I know girls and guys with double digit bodies and they’re not even 21 yet kek.

>>21814206
>I know party animal people that indulge in orgies and partner swapping
Your experience isn’t the average.

Normalize chastity and virtue. Normalize rejecting promiscuous people. Normalize taking pride in self-control.

>>21814241
Normalize not giving a shit.
But if you normalize all that, you’re going to end up as alone as you are now.
So I suggest normalizing, for yourself, going out and asking girls out. And don’t reject them for having had experiences. You aren’t 16 anymore

Do NOT normalize anything I do. I refuse to be a normalfag.

>>21814246
What will a girl do for my well being?

>>21814401
Companionship, friendship, support.
I conquered loneliness, but aloneness is another matter.
Not sure what you need. Was just a projecting guess, I suppose.

>>21814246
>>21814417
So basically be so desperate that you give up on standards at all

thoughts on rene girard?

>>21814246
I refuse.

>>21813647
I am going mad. I have been a bit off for some time but it receded for a while. But it feels like the universe is sending me people again, or I am manifesting them into my life.

The other day I was heartbroken over a girl who had rejected me and I some time to write a note which listed the qualities of the kind of girl I wanted, namely someone who toiled in isolation for years working on something, raging in the dark after some ideal. If it was some intellectual pursuit like the study of entropy or philosophy even better.

And lo and behold the day after I find a girl online who fits this description to a T. I've dealt with my fair share of solipsistic doubts in the past, but stuff like this deeply unsettles me and threatens to push me further into isolation. Could someone tell me if manifestation or synchronicity necessitates solipsism or not?

https://voca.ro/1bYcaXQldrBJ

I tried using /soc/ to find friends. What a mistake. That place is a cesspit

>>21813647
High functioning autism does not exist. Do not get confused by taking this statement as me meaning the same way how Facebook moms complain about how functioning labels are ableist. What I mean is the autism that would have otherwise been called “Asperger’s” a decade ago, is completely made up.

I brought this up before, and I remember one person acting offended, and saying “where did you get your degree in psychology?”. As if somebody needs to attend some university to know that what makes having limited interests a symptom of a defect or just a personality trait isn’t a complete matter of opinion. What’s the difference between a “symptom” and a personality trait? Well, as far as the DSM is concerned, people vote on it. How objective and science based.

People ask why I am emotionally invested in this, I don’t know? Maybe it has to do with my mom sending me to a school for mentally defective kids. My grades were fine as far as I can recall, I had a few things that I was passionate about and didn’t like talking to people, so I had a label put on me, so I guess treating me like a retard is justified, huh? Before you say it, I was not “misdiagnosed”, I fit the criteria just fine.

Hearing stories and videos of grown adults in their 30s and 40s “just finding out that their autistic” just confirms this idea to me. That whole label is for people and parents with Münchausen syndrome who know they are boring and just want to rectify that by making some non existent thing their identity.

>>21814864
I agree with you, sort of
I mean something exists, I just don't think we should classify it as autism. There's no reason the same term should be used to describe someone who can't pick up on social cues as someone who is non-verbal and can't independently function. I agree about the people though, it's really annoying that autism is "cool" now. When I was in highschool I used to have people make fun of me for being autistic, or they would point it out unprompted. Was difficult. Even though I've kind of outgrown it to the point people can't tell, I still deal with a lot of insecurities about how I act. Pisses me off when a girl I knew from highschool is now saying she's autistic. You didn't go through what I went through, bitch. I guess I should be glad that people like me won't have to go through that but I can't help feeling a bit bitter about my own experience.

I work at a table with a view out of the front window to my right, mostly obscured by my plants but I get a glimpse of passing cars and people walking by. I often see movement in my peripheral vision, a car pulling in to the driveway or a person walking up to the door, but nothing is there. I hear nonexistent cars, phantom vibrations of my phone going off. The slam of a car door causes me to wince. I disconnected the doorbell because the chime causes my heart to race and breath to become ragged.

I spent the morning in the sun, reading on the front porch. When the shade begin to take over the porch I went inside and the paranoia took over. I can't focus on what I'm working at. My mind and heart race. It never ends.

>>21814129
Based on observations of my own female friends and my girlfriends' friends in college, their goal is usually to establish a stable FWB situation with a guy that is "exciting" and makes them feel special, but this understandably is unstable for various reasons, and it can take them a while to get one they like. So they can shop around a lot while trying to find that guy who is worth wasting 2-3 months on, in the same way a guy shops around for porn before jacking off and sometimes goes way overboard and spends hours on it. I got the impression that for women in college, hooking up and dating are what videogames are for incel men, where you're always playing a few games semi-stably but trying new ones constantly as well, and you have ones you only play for special reasons like with the group of friends that likes them. Women do very similar things with men, they have their regulars with whom they have ups and downs, and then they have a whole lot of in between guys, and a lot of one-offs that they just did because they were bored for a night.

It isn't all girls, but I would say this was becoming the norm when I was there, and it seems to have become a lot worse since I left. I also noticed a lot of lying. Girls definitely won't admit to most of it. They also don't "count" a lot of things. Also, the girls who don't partake in it still do some of it, or go through phases of it, and then lie because it was "just a phase" or "we only ever made out" (this means they fucked at least a good amount). I wouldn't trust anything a woman says, even a woman who is performatively "non-slutty" and presents as a girl next door. Those are often the biggest skanks.

Also, men tend to overrate how aware of the internet culture war about gender relations women are. Most women are way more credulous than you would even guess. They tend to update to the latest firmware very quickly because they absorb it through constant socializing. The latest firmware for a long time has been that there's nothing wrong with being a slut. So a lot of them will be genuinely baffled and surprised when they even hear that there are guys who still have issues with it. I've had girls get mad at me when I said we shouldn't sleep together because I didn't want to add to their number just for a one night stand, I respected them too much for that. After a while I realized why this was, it was because their number was already really high and I was the first guy who had ever even given them a hint that guys exist who think about that stuff. To them, that's something out of the 1950s. I was like an alien to them when I said that. Now imagine how much casual fucking a girl like that does, if she gets guaranteed free attention and "excitement" from it, which is what women really want. It has no downside to them. To feel shame about it is as bizarre to them as feeling shame for being gay in 2023. It's medieval to feel shame.

>>21814953
I forgot to say, all terminally online egirls are extremely loose. You think your waifu is an exception because her autism is so "real" and noticeably and actually debilitating that she can barely function in real life and is online all day talking to you? Think fast, she just got fucked by two different guys she met online in the time it took you to read that sentence.

>>21814953
>I also noticed a lot of lying. Girls definitely won't admit to most of it. They also don't "count" a lot of things.
One-night stands don't count, sex with people they haven't officially dated don't count, sex with people they haven't LOVED don't count. I wish I was joking. I've had many female friends and this is unironically the way some of them have answered my questions. For some you have to force their bodycount answers through their teeth because they inherently know being slutty is a shameful thing but still act as if it was nothing. I had to explain to an old girlfriend that men didn't want to marry the village slut, and she simply couldn't believe men attached values to these sort of things, as if simply considering sex as something more special than drunkenly kissing a stranger was a whole new perspective to her. For some, holding hands and saying I love you is something more special than sex. Baffling.

I missed my chance and now I can't get it back. Sucks man.

>>21815011
the older i get, the more my misogyny asymptotically approaches 1950's parody levels

i just assume everything they say is a lie, i have less faith in a random woman than i would my enemy in a war

>>21815011
Women and men see sex very differently. For men it is something earned and there is generally a sense of pride and conquering involved. For women, it is just something that happens. I’ve found the opposite of what your saying to be true a lot of the time; when a woman wants to arouse a guy she just started dating, she will generally list some of the kinky stuff she did. Guys tend to want it both ways: hence the Madonna whore complex. You can’t have a chaste girl who is also a freak in the bed. The truth is usually somewhere in the middle

>>21815109
>hence the Madonna whore complex.
This is something made up by feminists who dont realize that all men arent one single person

Everything I read about teaching says it is a shit profession. However, I have nothing I can do besides this teaching program, unless I want to go back for a second bachelor's, which no one approves of. Plus, I cheated in my first bachelor's anyways, so maybe this is for the best. I dunno. What's a failure at life to do?

>>21815109
>when a woman wants to arouse a guy she just started dating, she will generally list some of the kinky stuff she did
Yeah I love when my new gf starts telling me about how she ate man ass

One time a girl started telling me about the "many" good reviews she received for her blowjob skills from previous men and I almost kicked her out of a moving car, how fucking damn can you be. Women have no knowledge of what makes them attractive to men, it takes a lot of the sting of dealing with them away when you realize they're basically 10 years old mentally but dealing with male lust and fetishism constantly. Their true innocent mentally childlike nature is not equipped to receive the sheer adult, animal ugliness of male sexuality, so they just bury themselves in it artificially and go rotten. I wonder how many modern women even have real female sexuality left, probably close to zero. All of them are really just mind broken sex slaves acting out male fantasies they don't understand, without even knowing it. Totally twisted up inside.

>>21815143
>All of them are really just mind broken sex slaves acting out male fantasies they don't understand, without even knowing it. Totally twisted up inside.
Im not even a feminist but this rings very true and it's deeply depressing. I guess this is the end of the horseshoe where terfs and reactionaries meet

Those who love life do not read. Nor do they go to the movies, actually. No matter what might be said, access to the artistic universe is more or less entirely the preserve of those who are a little fed up with the world.

>>21815143
I agree that women are kind of trained to see sexuality through a male lens. A lot of media trains that though, what gets popular on tiktok, reddit, the internet in general is this overacted kind of sexuality. A lot of women think sex is just this wild, moaning, screaming act which just sucks all the intimacy out of it. It takes a lot to train yourself out of that. I think men face it too, sometimes you can tell men have some porno playing in their head that they're trying to imitate.
Real intimacy is difficult to reach when it feels like everyone is trying to simulate the simulation of the real thing.

>>21815134
One day you'll realise that all 'professions' are shit.

You guys would not believe how massive the shit I just took was

>>21815237
>Women are objectified for history
Shocked when they objectify themselves
>>21815143
They also embellish not realizing the harm they are doing themselves. As stated above, guys want sex. Girls know guys want sex. Girls make themselves sexually objectified
>>21815117
Most anons here have a Madonna whore complex. Most think all women are sluts except their mother and their dream girl. Yet they want to fuck their dream girl. A little hypocritical

>>21815318
>Most anons here have a Madonna whore complex.
The average 4chan user is not a fair representative of the population

>>21815325
Touché

>>21814953
>Based on observations of my own female friends and my girlfriends' friends in college, their goal is usually to establish a stable FWB situation with a guy that is "exciting" and makes them feel special, but this understandably is unstable for various reasons, and it can take them a while to get one they like. So they can shop around a lot while trying to find that guy who is worth wasting 2-3 months on, in the same way a guy shops around for porn before jacking off and sometimes goes way overboard and spends hours on it
So in other words they behave like any college age person who can get laid and is afraid of commitment.

>>21814953
>>21815342
Ehh, I don’t think that’s totally true. Most girls want to be in a relationship. Incels here always talk about how the sexual revolution has hurt men. But it has hurt women equally. Sex become normalized. Girl likes Chad. Girl know Chad wants pussy. Girl gives up the pussy to Chad. Chad moves on to the next one. Anons here seem to be under the illusion that girls are never played and made a fool of

If you would just have sex with me I wouldn't be an incel

Low key, but kinda high key, but mostly low key wish I was dead

>>21815379
Do something about it.
>what depressive book you guys got??
Something else.

>>21815342
>>21815360
I forgot to add: guys come into their own later. There are not many guys in their late teens or early 20’s who are ready to settle down and be a provider. No wonder girls don’t marry guys that young. Men peak later on and it is easier to tell who is commitment worthy. Probably shouldn’t be saying this, but when I was in my late 20’s and early 30’s, I ended up hooking up with a high school girl. Her friends were all over me as well so I fucked a few of them. They were super clingy. I don’t think that would have been the case if it was a guy around their own age. It caused massive drama in that social group and my personal life.

>>21815404
As I get further on in my 20s and I've left that young mans awkwardness behind, I have become more attractive towomen. A big issue with youth culture todag is that it leaves behind guys who mature slower than women.
Also, holy shit, the Wall is real. Kind of scary to see it happen

>>21815420
Yeah. You become more comfortable with yourself. Honestly, a 12 year old girl is probably as awkward and mature as an 18 year old guy. Probably more confident too. It levels out down the road. Just because girls in your age bracket leave you behind doesn’t mean that the girls in the younger age bracket aren’t in play. I wish I could part with what I know now to the doom and gloom 20 year olds here. Dating is so much easier in your 30’s as long as you have independence.

>>21815342
yeah all those 5'2" brown/asian guys are having constant casual sex and juggling FWBs and one night stands on a whim lol fucking retarded roastie has no concept of life beyond her bubble as usual

>>21815237
Watching porn as a man who didn't grow up watching it is intense, every woman in every genre in every nationality is screaming nonstop and ad libbing the most horrid things. It's not even that it's too graphic, it's that it often makes no sense. 9 out of 10 things they say is absolutely horrific, mind boggling. And apparently all women think that being sexy means laughing like a supervillain, holding your breath a second, then gasping on the inhale.

>>21815254
Well, yeah. To some degree. However, I just thought things would've turned out differently for me. At least I would've hopefully gotten something that paid better, but eh. I just need a job to stop thinking so much. NEETdom isn't really the choice of kings, I'm convinced. There's so much time to just vegetate.

>>21815237
For me, when I feel my sexuality, when I try to meet it. The sensation I'm approaching is something I find myself describing as holding something precious in my hands, knowing that I can crush the life out of it but instead choosing to protect it. The value in that is also being chosen , being allowed to position myself in that way around this thing. Like making friends with a small animal, holding a baby bird in my hands. It's frightening because I can so easily see how this balance breaks and it becomes exclusively an act of violence.

>>21815420
Now that I'm 25 but I look 18/19 in a good way and I'm also much more competent, knowledgeable, mature, rich, connected than guys those age yet not some 40 yo boomer this is what younger girls really love.

Feelsgood.

>>21815237
>male lens
>wild, moaning, screaming act which just sucks all the intimacy out of it
Who says males see it that way, this is banging some random hoe you meet at concrete when you're drunk, this is not love or intimacy and as long as women try to imitate or channel this vibe they will be treated like a random hoes guys only want to fuck as soon as possible.

I just went to the /v/ archive and it randomly started to play music, some country sounding track about "what's going down in the valley" or some shit. Did anyone else get it, too? I have my adblock on and it definitely came from 4chan.

>>21815509
>Robot thinks he's human

>>21815509
It should actually be very simple for the girls to figure this out, guys want to fuck a pornstar yet no one wants to marry one. So unless their goal is to be seen as attractive fuckable objects they should move away from pornstar/hoe behaviour/aesthetic as possible.

They seem to confused that men love what they are turned on by, most of the time its's the exact opposite men love thins that don't turn them on at all and are disgusted by things that do as soon as their dick gets soft, only exception is a girl they really love and you don't get there by being a slut.

>>21815526
Apparently the track is called "down in the valley to pray" by Greg Jong, from the Wasteland 3 soundtrack. None of the other boards have music play when I click on the archive button. Weird.

>>21815533
I went with a girl once who was really good at sex but started doing this nasty pornstar act and I legit laughed. It's not hot IRL lol

>>21815237
>sometimes you can tell men have some porno playing in their head that they're trying to imitate.
porn sex is so different than real sex it's almost the opposite. you're not even supposed to thrust like a mongrel in out in out inside her, that's camera shit
everything is made for the camera, porn is a grotesque circus

>>21813647
Surprised at how my life just went on a huge downwards spiral in February/March 2020, and I couldn't recover from it until the second half of 2021. I'm in a better place right now, but things from back then still haunt me to this day. I engaged in self-destructive behaviours, purposefully ruined my life, broke my relationships, engaged in vices. I can't remember most of the things that happened back then. I ended up having a mental breakdown in October 2021, and was close to committing suicide, but my life started improving from that point on. I still don't know why I didn't kill myself, but I realized that I had hit rock bottom, and things couldn't go lower than I was at that point. Sadly, I still think about what happened back then, and it causes me a lot of anguish. If I've suicidal lately, it's been because of those things I did back then. I'm afraid I could go back to my old ways. I'm afraid those things might come back and ruin my life now.

>>21815590
i feel bad for zoomers and anyone who was in their 20s during covid. i'm fairly old and it fucked me up, just imagine if that was your one chance in life to do you bachelors and a third of it was spent on zoom classes from your bedroom in parents house. you can always go back to school to collect vocational masters, but that undergrad is a once in a lifetime.

man it's ramadan again. my bff faux gf ghosted me at the end of ramadan last year. i think her family put her up to it, probably arranged a marriage for her. i'm not muslims and don't have a phd/mba like everybody in her family, so it was never going to work. still a bummer when the inevitable end came. did i accomplish anything in that year? absolutely not. kinda depressing ngl. i can't do anything about her disappearing, but i could do something worthwhile.

>>21815607
I just came from my second date with this fat chick and I have decided to not go through with it.
My thinking was maybe I could look past her being fat if the personality matched mine but alas it does not.
Quad vaxxed, not an animal lover and some other things that means she's some (big) basic girl.

If she asks me out for a third date i might say yes and make clear my intentions. Maybe just say straight out that I'm looking to fuck her and not for a relationship at all. But maybe not even that, it's just that I haven't fucked in years. Makes a man desperate.

>>21815647
Didn't mean to quote ramadan guy.

Am I the only one who thinks threads are retarded where anons arguing book/writer x is better than book/writer y? It’s a literal opinion and no one backs up their argument well. It’s often either appeal to authority, appeal against authority, or straight up mud slinging. Why must anons always pit one book or writer against another? They do know you can like more than one book and tastes differ, don’t they?

>>21815607
>brown/muslim girl
>everybody in family is "mid" upper middle class professional
>jerking white boys around
many such cases. dodged a bullet, guarantee she has insane daddy issues and is effectively a psychopath and npd from her family's abnormal relationship with its religion, culture, status, and daughters. those bitches are always broken

dw she hates her own people and will end up either miserable in the quasi arranged marriage with some dentist who views her as a brood mare, or single and over 30 and hated by her parents so she hates them back by getting even more crazy. one whitey wasn't going to save her from this, she was destined for this since birth

Woke up and still thinking about the girl in the train that I stared at like a retard but didn't talk to. I'm such a fucking idiot. It was one of those cases where the girl had a huge beaming arrow above her telling me TAKE THIS and I'd never been wrong about it but this time I chickened out. This will haunt me for the rest of the week. I'm fantasizing about meeting her again and remedying, I could go sour grapes and think she probably had a boyfriend already or that she'd have dropped me for one reason or the other but it feels like even worse cope, she was perfect and I let her slip by

>>21815665
her dad was pretty liberal but when he died apparently her brother took over as the male who runs her life and it was never the same.

>>21815526
It's a ripoff of the version from O Brother Where Art Thou
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9cCcGIstCw

This scene reminds me of Chesterton talking about the first time he saw a Catholic church procession and really "got" it. Beautiful song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zSif77IVQdY

The Wasteland 3 style reminds me of Avi Kaplan
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=382BTxLNrow

which kind of reminds me of Woodkid
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSkb0kDacjs

When you are freed from college and enter the workforce, what's next, really? I've never really asked myself that question. What will I do in my free time? Write, go out with friends? Is this real life? I've been away from these things for the last five years. I've never had the opportunity to do anything with a peaceful mind or completely relax. There was always another step to take and another something to worry about because of my poor upbringing.

Now I know what that 'a whole page of my life is about to turn' feeling they always describe in books is like. I'm tired of stress and all that jazz so I think I'm just going to go into minimum efforts mode and relax for a long time. I just hope the world won't go into shit as soon as I'm out of college because that would suck ass.

>>21815667
there's still this chick i saw on a train out to queens in the 2000s to work a construction gig. it was early morning in the summer and the sun was bright af. she looked south asian but had her in the puerto rican style, so i assume she was west indian maybe trini or something. the train was pretty crowded but no one stood between us, it takes what feels like an eternity to get out by flushing man, that shit is faaar.

>>21813647
A bunch of young girls always talk to me whenever I’m around the neighborhood or out front of my place. I wonder if parents are giving me the stink eye and talking to each other preparing pitchforks and torches. I hate how cynical society is

>>21815692
>When you are freed from college and enter the workforce, what's next, really?
This question got me to NEET suicidally for 10+ years

>>21815684
Yeah, but why is it playing there? Nobody in the catalog mentioned it so far. Has it been like this for a while? Why that track in particular? Was it featured in some meme?

>>21815694
guess I'll have to add this to the big book of regrets. God damnit I wanna hit my head against a wall

>>21815692
Finding a wife/husband, buying a house, having kids, etc.

>>21815705
the funny thing is watching fight club as an old guy, the advice the dad gave saying "get job, get a wife, have kids" etc. is actually the real advice, but when i saw fight club in 1999 i was like ya that's shits wack, i wanna do something rad. yah, well i spend a few years living in a rooming house that poured water down the walls when it rained, had major roaches, and a bunch of rando dudes coming in and out. it was not actually that cool. that guy should have just kept his condo. if he needed adventure he should have started a startup or started yolo trading or something instead of going insane.

>>21815705
I recently connected with my father who is a succesful man.
When the topic of what I want to achieve came up I said what you said. He was disappointed and thought I should have a higher bar than that.
He was of course correct. Either have a dream for a business, to change society in some way or give yourself completely to religion/helping people. Build something awesome or learn an art.
If you shoot for one of those a woman and children will come easily.
Shoot for a simple life and if you miss you'll miss out on it all.
It was so simple I was kind of embarassed that i thought in such a way.
Raised by single mom moment.

>>21815692
If this were a normal society, then your life would just be beginning since you would either be excited at all the new opportunities to embiggen your family and the family patrimony, or you would be entering what the Romans called the cursus honorum

But it's not a normal society so I think you're supposed to play video games and masturbate and pathetically beg post-wall women to go to $45 bad sushi with you

Let's just say there's a reason that rich people with infinite parental money all make pretty much the same decision: go back to college for more degrees, to prolong the feeling of being "25ish" as long as possible. I know niggas who are still doing it at 36. As Sam Hyde said to the moustache hipster in Williamsburg Street Fashions
>You're a real salty dog aren't you?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5xr3MKKBTY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6HzOL5J_vQ

My 30s have been unbearable so far. I don't think I have another year in me. I'm completely done, my life is a failure. Every day is excruciating. And the worst is that it was all bound to happen no matter what
I need a miracle, even just a finger to grab onto so I can pull myself out of this muck but it's not coming

It’s actually extremely important that you find your vocation in your 20s.

>>21815509
The male gaze I'm referring to is the one in porn. Porn is pretty exclusively shot and directed by men so I assume that men at least want to see that somewhat. Women see this and think that if men watch porn like this, men want to see this in real life. I don't think any women actually wants to scream during sex, they just kind of feel like they should be or something. Or that something is wrong if they aren't
It goes both way though, I said to my friend once, "he seems like the kind of guy who thinks hitting you and pulling your hair during sex makes it good" and she laughed and said that was exactly right. I don't think most women want that at all, they just think women do because of porn. I once dated a guy who kept trying to pull my hair and I'd bat his hand away, then he'd try again. I kept batting his hand away and eventually asked wtf he was doing, he said "I thought you'd like that". I don't know what gave him that idea, I don't like anything like that. BDSM also seems to be way more common to the point that people think you're boring and lame if you only want vanilla. Porn just seems like its destroyed sex, I'm not surprised this next generation is having the least sex despite being seemingly the most sexual with "bimbo aesthetic" and "big titty goth" sex has become more of an aesthetic than anything, and so rarely anything actually good or natural gets drown out by the illusion of what it should be.

>>21815692
You need to figure out something to do with your life which seems worthwhile and you need to start it ASAP. If you wait until you’re 30, you’re screwed.

>>21815754
My vocation is working extremely hard to make $130,000 a year so I can live in an expensive congested city filled with violent minorities and somehow end up barely breaking even every year. It's worth it because I get to be around millennials who "go out" 3+ times a week

>>21815760
only thing I seem capable of doing is larping as diogenes

>>21815754
What happens if you don't? I haven't but I am lucky to be a stay at home spouse to someone who earns a lot, so I don't have any living expenses or anything. Sometimes I feel a lot of anxiety cause I feel like I should be doing something anyway

its funny how the whole "ill get my shit together tomorrow" excuse falls apart once you zoom out and see how long you've been saying it. ive heard that when a fisherman gets a hook stuck in his hand, its easier to push it through rather than pulling it out. i think i apply the same sort of mentality to my afflictions
https://youtu.be/A3cwRGT1OQ0

>>21815789
What are your afflictions

>>21815782
If you're a woman it doesn't matter
If you're a man then kek

So my sun and moon signs are in Capricorn but my rising is Sagittarius. Isnt this a massive conflict?

I am without shape

>>21814864
I dunno about you but I was diagnosed when I was eight years old and someone like MC Hammer was on the top of the billboard charts then. I don’t think the disorder was even well known at that point.

>>21815846
Get in shape

>>21815590
Yeah yeah yeah we all went crazy and suicidal during the covid shit

>>21815722
Your dad sounds retarded. Dont forget that he's the reason you were raised by a single mom

>moon is in capricorn
>lilith in scorpio
I will never have a healthy relationship

teeth related dream

>>21815318
>Yet they want to fuck their dream girl.
I don't

>>21815930
It's Weimar World now

>>21815935
where are the rest of planets?

>>21816007
>People are having sexxxxx
>it is so weimerrrr
Weimar Republic Germany had severe monetary problems that haven't even started here (US) yet, much less the world.
All you rightwing anons getting despondent about life are actually waiting for the crash too. In hopes the DNC/RNC will welcome in a fascist dictatorship to stop the people's movement

The cheerleading squad took turns spitting in my mouth again, against my will :(

I drank 4 beers and I still don't feel good. I spent a lot of money on videogames and I don't want to play them. All my favorite pornstars are retired of left the industry. I don't know what to do anymore.

>>21816089
You really read a lot into my post.

I started noticing this weird fascination with words and language in me lately. To give you an example, I see some passage that goes like "He eviscerated his argument" and I think for myself how cool and clever was the use of eviscerate in this context, how beautiful of a metaphor it is and I how I wish I could come up with something like that in my speech or text. It evokes some feeling inside me, that I cannot describe. I guess the closest word would be "inspiration".
I want to become good with words to better express myself orally or in writing. Becoming a writer seems like something that would scratch that itch, though I'm not sure about it. But at the end of the day the words are just medium for one's ideas and I have no ideas to convey, so no matter how good I could theoretically become in saying things I have nothing to say really.

I've noticed my sexual drive changing in recent years. For a long time it was a very vague urge that demanded release in some way, but now there's a definite desire for sexual intimacy with a woman as opposed to simple release via masturbation. Concurrent with this is an increasingly strong urge to have children, which I didn't really notice having until my 20s.
Of course it's meaningless because I'm never gonna have sex anyway but I thought it was interesting than my urges would sort of crystallize like this.

>>21813647
Give up. You can't win.

Been really hard suicidal for the past two days. I always think about death and the worst spells were occasional but now it's days and days back to back. Health is deteriorating, can't sleep. I'm posting this useless shit here which I loathe, I don't like this 4chan confessional shit. I can't come to terms with the idea that my life is over and nothing I want is achievable any longer. I want to go innawoods and have an accident

I'm quitting my antidepressants today.

>>21816427
taper them out, don't go cold turkey

>>21816427
why?

>>21816437
Withdrawls aren't that bad, so I'll be fine after a couple days.

>>21816470
No reason not to. They do nothing to begin with.

>>21816483
maybe it depends on the doses because I felt like absolute shit

>>21816501
I once was taking Effexor and the withdrawls were hellish. Relatively, what I'm taking now is much more mild. It still makes you feel like shit though. I can take it.

>>21816089
>rightwing
>fascist
Illiterate leftoid that's the current globohmo system, rightwingers want liberty

>>21815755
>male gaze
That's a jewish feminist theory
>Porn is pretty exclusively shot and directed by men
By jews male and female they are all the same

>>21815917
You know nothing of why I was raised by just my mom.
You got your feelings hurt by what he said which is funny.

>>21816553
Not him but stands the fact that this is reality now. People get their bonding drilled out of them at a young age

>>21816089
>Weimar Republic Germany had severe monetary problems that haven't even started here (US) yet, much less the world.
Wait a couple months. A moderately large bank just failed last week, causing an amount of money equal to about 1% of the US GDP to just disappear overnight. This is a sign of things to come; we're right at the beginning of a financial crisis that will dwarf 2008.

>>21816585
>we're right at the beginning of a financial crisis that will dwarf 2008.
i just want love, I don't care about poverty
like I live in a house that's falling apart, I don't mind it. I brush my shoes and iron my clothes and I go outside. I don't care about being poor.

>>21815755
I adressed this here >>21815533

Sure men *want* to see it, but chances are not from someone they have feelings for. This is why men can in fact "cheat" on their partner with no emotional betrayal because it was purely physical and they still love their partner as much they did before if not more and with women it is generally the opposite, they cheat emotionally and get attached to the person they cheat with and distant from their partner. While I obviously don't condone either it is absolutely false to say both are the same. For a male cheater in essence it's no different from a bad porn addiction and for female it is complete betrayal of the partnership and romantic relationship.

This is why women who channel porn behaviour are setting themselves up to be objectified, not taken seriously by men of value and likely end up unhappy alone, and male playboys while immoral porn addicts/coomers can still be solid family men that love their wife and take good care of their children.

>>21813647
Beer is for the weak. I get buzzed from pure divine inspiration

A time traveler from 2013 /lit/ comes here in 2023

>>21815751
What’s so bad?

>>21815782
I think it only applies to men.

>>21814864
>That whole label is for people and parents with Münchausen syndrome who know they are boring and just want to rectify that by making some non existent thing their identity.
It's not just this. When Asperger's was looking at kids, being a Nazi with the less democratic science ideals involved in that period, he was looking at "smart" but not well socialized kids. Modern psychology would register that as neglected kids seeking validation: they're hyperfixated and can fixate for so long because no caregiver is interrupting it and they receive probably their only positive feedback through being smart.
A lot of symptoms of autism, even the more extreme ones, can be created in otherwise healthy children through neglect. The refrigerator mother theory in some respects dealt with those cases appropriately but blame for the parents has ebbed away as we're allowing populist support to maintain "Asperger's" as a legitimate diagnosis. The reconstitution of Asperger's and autism as being the same category but a spectrum is entirely due to populist support for the Nazi doctor solution which sees the kids as broken but smart, and the parents as blameless creators of a genius.
The vast majority of child psychology today is parents being disappointed in their kid not fulfilling their expectations, and colluding with a medical system which is genuinely ethically and scientifically questionable. There's a confluence of both parents willing to discharge their deficits and a psychiatric system which is getting too much money to bother looking at patient outcomes or basic reason, and without those socio-economic benefits, the current system would fade away. At the moment though, psychiatry is still a growth industry, so eliminating the child abuse it facilitates is like trying to eliminate stablecoin enthusiasts throwing their money down the drain claiming it's not a fiat currency.

Just realized I haven't jacked off in a week. When do I get my super powers?

I really hate my job and for the last 5 years or so now, especially the last 2 years, I’ve found life to be really disappointing and boring.

How do I save a 4chan thread including all the images? If I save it with my browser it saves only the miniature preview images not the actual ones

I'am a twenty seven year old virgin with an excessive amount of pride. And it's getting to the point whre it's becoming very difficult to control the bestial urges inside me. Alas, i'am a coward. Even if a women were to drop in my lap i know i would fumble it. Behind my listless countenance a chained, emaciated mutt clawing at the ground and barking incessantly. It' seems so hard to love. I'am sorry.

>>21816780
But do you actually want to improve your life? Are you doing anything in that regard?

>>21816422
Literally me

>>21816791
People cannot change.

>>21816803
People can only change. Trying to hold on to what you think you are is what causes all the trouble.

>>21816812
I have attempted. Only a flimsy mask that yields even to the faintest wind. It costs so much of my energy to simply keep it up. Impossible.

I lived past 2 years almost like Oblomov since I quit my last job.
My plan was to start my business and I have it all planned out all written out but wicked procrastination, laziness and lethargy got the better of me. I make one small step forward then I take month off to "recover" or as an "award" for my achievement but more often than not as a cope, where I say yo myself "look how easy it is, you did this thing almost effortlessly there's no reason to worry about achieving your goals, relax take it easy".
And then I do just that, daydreaming, making new plans, thinking and when I get tired of that I go to some escapism like this website, politics, conspiracies, philosophy, economics, films, my interests are almost endless but they bring me no closer to my goals that I know are absolutely vital for me to achieve.
I'm never depressed, I'm extremely positive, optimistic with high goals, I sometimes although rarely get short feeling of dread but I easily overcome those.
I was quite literally dragged down by my own inertia and inaction, when you stop moving completely and you need Herculean effort to start back moving, unfortunately I by myself do not posses such strength.

Recently I have reestablished my relationship with God and Christ, I was religious for about the past 10 years and only getting more with time but like with every other relationship unless you put effort in it it will fade away and was happening to my faith almost cyclically.
I've began praying daily and nightly, reading Christian books, listening to Christian podcasts and finally yesterday I had enough will power to make myself go to my home gym for some light exercise after a long time. I felt much better after that and today even though I'm a little sore I went back to do some more exercises on my own without forcing myself.
This is a fantastic achievement for now, I will do my best to keep it up and hopefully actually get some real things finally done with Gods help.

Tl;dr: Pray and force yourself to some physical activity if you're stuck, it will only get better.

All thats left to do is to get over my fear that executing any plans I make will only lead to bad outcomes that show how absolutely wrong I am about everything... Fuck.

>>21816803
Change is the fundamental part of human nature and nature in general, you will change wether you like it or not but unless you're the one in charge of this change to direct it where you want it will almost certainly be change for the worse.

Seek God, pray, set clear and realistic goals that lead towards the the change you want, break it up into small tasks and try to identify the underlying core cause of your problems, try to understand it and see that it's ultimtively not that big of a deal and mostly product of your mind running wild.

>>21815722
Very well said anon, and true your dad know what he's talking about.

>>21813647
Bros, Should I get them as my first (and most likely only) jordans? They're like double retail price (up to $550 from $270 retail :/ ) where I'm from now

I am unproductive because I can't concentrate. I can't concentrate because I am angry at myself for being unproductive.

Little disappointed by Ben Franklin's autobiography. Like DFW wrote, when you read the autobiography of some eminent person, you always latently expect them to have some insight to share on what makes them so great and how they achieved it. And you are consequently let down when they go on to describe their feats as if it were the most natural and obvious thing. A jealous mind could assert that they hide their struggles to lift themselves up out of prude. But Franklin makes no secret of his vanity wherever it appears; he even confesses to believe vanity uplifts men at times, and in all respects he appears fully honest.

This is to say, in other words, we secretly hope a biography will show some hidden depth to a person, and when it reveals the public image of him was exact all along it is kind of a let down.

I wish I had a father or older brother to give me life advice when I was younger. I had to figure everything out on my own and I paid the price for it in lost time and failures. I would do anything to wake up 5 years younger knowing what I know now.

>>21817154
What if the secret is precisely that it has to be natural and that who you are is who you always will be?

>>21817154
What a Stirner-ite

>>21817017
Instead of getting angry at yourself, try to identify any external factors that may be affecting your ability to concentrate.
Then set small, achievable goals for yourself that will bring you closer to where you want to be.

>the plan: bench and squat 3-5x5 @ 95%
>what happened: 3x5,4,3 bench and 3x3 squat
Finishing up the training block, a little let down by my top-sets but all it tells me is that I'll have to calculate a little more conservatively next block. I'll PR for sure in all lifts, but my squat seems to be lagging more than I wanted.
The overall goal is a 1000lb total by the end of the year. Currently sitting at 205 bench, 295 squat, 355 deadlift.

>>21817283
>Currently sitting at 205 bench, 295 squat, 355 deadlift.
Relax you're doing fine, few people approach those numbers.

How long have you been lifting?

i wish i could commit suicide without any reservations, but my parents’ love for me keeps me tethered to this world. i should loathe them for being stupid enough to create a biological failure like myself, but my love for them prevents me from doing so. at this point, i might just hire somebody to murder me

Got my disability cheque today, bought a biography of Aleister Crowley from Amazon + a copy of Napoleon the Great by Andrew Roberts on Indigo's website using a gift card I got for my birthday. Feelin good r.n

>>21817294
Consistently without breaks, just under 12 weeks. In general, since last May. I'm a .milfag though so I've been doing random gym sessions, running, calisthenics, etc outside of focused lifting for the last 4 years.

>>21816674
I got old and I feel old, my life crashed in my mid 20s and now I have nothing except what I do as leisure which used to be my vocation and went through a painful downsizing over the years
I threw my life in the trash. All I have left is a life of mediocrity as a faceless number, which is exactly what I didn't want to be
I gambled and lost

>>21817328
So what’s wrong with writing yourself a comeback story? Do you know how many people would kill to have an opening chapter that starts with the vocation it ends with? Talk about a story arc. You know most people have nothing. They’ve done nothing and will do nothing. Their story sucks and there’s nothing compelling about it. You still have a chance to write a good story for yourself here.

I’m really unhappy with how things turned out. I wish I could do them over but I can’t.

>>21817347
This compromising mindset is exactly what gets people to accept a life of mediocrity. I'm sure that everyone who's accepted defeat believed at some point that he still had a chance to write a new chapter. Of course. Marrying that single mom wasn't that bad after all wasn't it. I've known these men who picked up only later in life, I would rather die. It's all just cope, you can see it in their eyes, when you do see something. A good life is a snowball, it doesn't stop anywhere at any point. If it hits a wall or grinds to a halt it's over.

>>21817154
Only redditors believe that everyone is secretly a retarded degenerate cripple that succeeds by chance or evil, and that there are no saints or heroes.

>>21817154

>someone has been being a shithead to me for a while now
>finally scrape up their dox and check out who this bitch is
>works a MLM memejob and a part time labor job just to make rent, broke as shit and high stress, no education and no skills
>has a stupid name (think on the lines of bertha or marge), is ugly and fat
>unmarried bitter fat ugly old bitch in her late 40s renting a dogshit apartment
>addicted to cigs and booze
>terrible sleep habits, major health issues from lifestyle
>no bf, no husband, no friends or family
>realize there is no revenge i can get on her because her life is already rock bottom garbage by her own hand
>realize she's being a shithead to everyone around her because she's miserable and lashing out like a demon

and thus the revenge arc has resolved. i'm already out of here in a week and will never see the cunt again. might subscribe her to weightwatchers advertisements for the lolz though. there's nothing i can do to top what she's already done to herself.

>>21817279
Yeah, that's good advice, and I know this is the way to actually improve. I just get so angry it's hard to think straight.

>>21817364
Giving up IS the mediocre life.

>>21816563
Thats an extremely effeminate response and projection. Your dad is a retard and it shows in you.

>>21816019
>Sun in Capricorn
>Moon in Capricorn
>Mercury in Capricorn
>Venus in Aquarius
>Mars in Libra
>Jupiter in Picese
>Saturn in Aries
>Uranus in Aquarius
>Neptune in Aquarius
>Pluto in Sagittarius
>Lilith in Scorpio
>N. Node in Leo
>Ascendent Saggitatrius

>>21817531
I'm not eating other people's crumbs off the floor just to survive. I choose dignity. There's no dignity in rolling with the rat race knowing that you'll get the same industrially made consolation prize.

Western manga readers are prone to only look up recent works and hardly treasure the history of their medium, this doesn't happen as much elsewhere. Why is that the case?

>>21817584
I wasn’t advocating for that so..

I’ll be turning 30 soon and I’m really bothered by my failure to set out on any particular path that I can feel proud of. I’m just a normal office worker with a normal job, but I never wanted that for myself. For the first time ever I’m totally sure of that, but it does feel too late now. It might just be the case that by my age, who you’ve been is who you’ll be.

>>21817613
There's nothing else to do, realistically. I won't achieve self-realization, there's only swallowing and coping left. You can paint it however you wish in fancy terminology, but that's what it all really is. Actually, this is what even people who've been snowballing smoothly all along end up with sometimes, so nobody's safe. But defeat is defeat and you don't get second chances, only crumbs. It's hard to accept that this is it for me. I really do want to delude myself but I don't want to.

i have no idea how to file taxes and at this point im afraid to ask

Why do we urinate when we do? Why not hold it in and cause damage to the body?

Once I beat my social anxiety, I'll be unstoppable!
I'm working on it bros. Giving lectures to 40-ish people twice weekly, playing that number game and building confidence.

Why are things considered phallic and not finger-ic?

>>21817654
You've never played dick-finger-hammer?

>>21817634
Ask chat gpt

but don't give it any real numbers just in case

>>21817634
Most people just take the papers to a tax prep place. They charge a little off the top, but probably less than turbotax does nowadays.

>>21817654
Poets and dinosaurs already took dactylic and nobody wanted to fight them for it.

>>21817661
No but it sounds like my kind of party.

>>21817634
Ranked in terms of easy to hard
>Walk into a tax filing assistance business like HR Block in a neighborhood with demographics that positively correlate with general conscientiousness and competence, thank me later for this tip
>Ask an "adulting" normie friend who knows how to do taxes to guide you through it
>Use TurboTax or something similar, where it literally just prompts you to input values from bloxes on tax forms you have from your income sources (job), which you will quickly realize isn't rocket science if you're a standard middle class job guy simply reporting income
>Fill out tax forms yourself, aka turbotax analog pencil and 1-2 hours at the kitchen table edition
>Mail federal return to IRS + state return to state

Throughout the process keep in mind that everything has to be simple enough that literal fucking monkeys can do it so if you have a question or make a mistake it's not a big deal

I'm just asking too much. Always just a bit too much. Isnt it enough to never experience love and friendship? Why am I being kicked down by God? No one can answer.

>Have been slowly but surely becoming more adult over the years
>Better late than never
>Use dating apps throughout this time
>Occasionally get a girl who seems semi-interested in at least meeting up
>I'm afraid of driving, can't do it
>Finally get over fear of driving
>Suddenly not a single woman will even message me on a dating app
>Can't meet women irl
>On the rare occasions I do, they're either not attractive to me or won't give me any indication they want anything other than friendship or have a bf
My whole life feels like ships passing in the night.

threads are becoming increasingly depressing again. hang in there guys

>>21817915
I wish I could be optimistic but I dont want to be dishonest.

>>21817154
I don't see what's so great about Ben Franklin.

>>21817930
He was a total chad

dear christ
please help my obese upstairs neighbor lose weight
thank you amen

>>21817399
1. Homer

2. Stone's film does uncover who assassinated JFK.

My older sister and brother were both highly succesful in life, both have good jobs, families now, children, life, friend circles, while I'm 22yo NEET who worked in a shitty warehouse job last year and fired myself 2 months ago because I was highly depressed about losing my life working in a shitty job that leads me nowhere. I'm always hiding my sadness in front of my family, smile and tell them I'm okay cause I don't want to concern them. I feel so fucking contradictory all the time; I'm genuinely handsome, fit, not retarded guy, who can talk with people without much problems, but that's all like a play for me, it's not real me, it's like someone takes steers of my character when in social interactions. And then sometimes I act as if I was turned off and from being eloquent well-mannered guy I turn into an emo kid who can't utter a basic sentence. My family sent me to two psychiatrists because they were genuinely scared that I'm gonna kms and I basically lied to both of them that they're exaggerating my problems. I don't want to kms, but I don't want to live the life the way people want me to. Being a wagie is nightmare, but being a NEET is nightmare, too. I wish God was real and wasn't as retarded as the Christian one who left us with outdated contradictory codex on this wasteland. I wish there were more proof of something existing after death cause I can't get myself to believe in what my parents believed just because they were born in specific place with specific religion forced upon their ancestors instead of other part of the world with other beliefs. I want to believe there is something more to this dumbass fucking world

My boyfriend's ex was posting about missing him and I want her to kill herself.

LOVE IS STRONK

>>21817541
No projection, you made a retarded comment out of anger.
Called you out on it and now you're trying to act alpha.

>>21818066
You're mad because you still worship your dad and can't stand to hear him criticized

>>21818095
What about my original post made you want to respond to it?
It was a perfectly normal response to someone who laid out what you should aim for after entering the workforce.
It gave a different point of view.

Now take your reply, a seething snarky post with a assumption in it ( he's the reason you were raised by a single mom).
Would love to see you explain why that's normal and how I 'worship' my dad and how he's retarded.
Cause I think you're the oddball here.

>>21817627
I think you could be like Bukowski or better but if you want to wallow that’s fine dude. The beginning of the story arc is the most important part. You have a good one. If you want to throw it away, go ahead.

>>21817634
You get a w2 from your employer and then you download TurboTax.

>>21813647
I miss this person. I dream about her. I want to have sex with her and I wish for her greatest good.

Yet I doubt myself, and keep asking do I really love her.

I'm so confused.

I am in constant fear and pain. I don't know what I want or what I am. I just want to kill myself but can't because I am a pussy. So many pains and scars. Bring human is humiliation.

>>21818141
how old are you?

hookers are so much better than regular women it's insane

>>21818180
i'm ready for the whorepill, write me a manifesto and guide please. aren't they all ratchet broads that only bukowski would like to fuck?

>>21818187
More women than ever are becoming whores.
So you can get 'escorts' which are at least on the outside less disgusting whores.

The thing with whores is that you're doing it correctly if you're not paying her to fuck you, you're paying her to leave afterwards.

Women can suck the fun out of situations and waste your time.
If your time is valuable or you just prefer to spend it without some broad near you, whores are the solution.

Quick suck and fuck and she's gone and you got it out of your system. No watching god awful Netflix shows after, no more listening to inane stories about where she traveled or who said what at her job.
Just you in your bed, balls emptied and ready to do whatever the fuck you plan on doing in this world.

>>21818207
but how do i meet them? how do i find ones who are the intersection of the spheres 'hot' 'young' and 'cheap' on the venn diagram, without getting aids? don't you have to pay hunter biden money to get hot ones, and then those are all sex trafficed slaves?

>>21818224
they are literally everywhere bro

>>21817681
neat thx.

>sitting around doing something
>randomly hit with a powerful urge to hurry up and marry a nice girl and start a family
>tell myself that's basically a fantasy in the current year
>urge still doesn't go away
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

my eric weinstein impression:
>you really wanna know what i think about ufos, joe?
>have you ever heard of the maxwell equation?
>have you heard of a guy named ernest engelbert?
>joe, this man is terrifying to me
what do you mean?
>joe, when this man walked on to the campus of brown university, people hid in their offices
so is he like smart or something?
>joe, ernest engelbert is the michael jordan of theoretical physics, and i mean that in more ways than one
>*deep breath* joe, string theory is over. the reign of post-einsteinian physics is down the fucking toilet, and people like me who warned about this were called kooks
>so you said you dont know what maxwells equation is? joe if only you knew how poetic that truly is.
>what alllll these ufo people are doing is looking for something that is not really there, not because ufos dont exist, but they dont exist in the way the so-called experts think they do, its like algebra and calculus
>so, joe, tell me, where was calculus before newton
where
>exactly, joe
>in 1993, my phd advisor, david murdock, who was a true genius, you know what he told me joe? he said that physics is the map, and not the territory
whoa

>childhood me: mommmmm all the other kids have the NEW playstation, i dont WANT to play the old one
>adult me: haven't spent money on electronics or played video games in 4 years, excited to get home and "try" 69 cent pencil sharpener purchased at walmart on way home from work

>>21818270
cut out 4chan + other socials for a week or so. the demoralisation will almost certainly be completely gone within that time. it's not just a case of
>if only you knew how different things could be
but on top of that, it's
>if only you knew how near your grasp the man you want to be really is

my perfect physiognomy is all I have.... God always gives you some compensation...

Anyone else on lit suffer from chronic anxiety? Like it’s everyday unrelenting. Any tips? Is it possible to cure? What do you do?

>>21818557
Look into transcendental meditation or breath meditation and actually stick with it for at least 90 days while reading a little bit about the rationale behind Patanjali's yoga and Buddhist meditation techniques. Get Benson's Relaxation Response and a practical guide The Mind Illuminated, and look into a few things like Zazen until you find something that clicks for you. The point is to just practice for a while and get a sense for why it works. You want to build up an understanding of how meditation works as you practice, so the theory and practice meet in the middle. Basically what you are doing is taking the "stream" of consciousness that is you at any given moment and training your mind's eye to realize that only part of that stream is the actual, real you, while the rest of the stream is an aggregate clinging to the real you: conditioned reflexes and associations, emotions, sensations, meta-thoughts about these thoughts and sensations, behavioral complexes and traumas, etc.

The purpose of starting with a simple form of meditation like either transcendental (mantra) meditation or breath meditation is to just give you the first-hand experience of "separating" your real self, or mind's eye, from the not-self elements that cling to it. The theory can describe this to you a hundred thousand ways but you can only truly understand it once you've experienced it, which requires practicing for a while. Likewise you can experience it directly a hundred times but get stuck there, unless you read a little bit that can contextualize and explain what is happening to you, in a way that gives you new things to apply and weave into your practice. This is why it's helpful to have a teacher, because they know what the process was like for themselves and for others they've taught and known, so they can guide you to cultivate your own unique mental visualizations and strategies for understanding, as they emerge throughout practice, while also making sure you stick with practice. But you can do it on your own too. It's just harder.

What does this have to do with anxiety? Your anxiety may be partly neurological or physiological, and simply beyond any ability of the mind to confront and control. It's possible. But this is probably rare, and anxiety in most people probably stems from the peculiar ways in which their highly conditioned mind "routes" stimuli. This can be due to trauma, or simply due to individual peculiarities like autism and being a "highly sensitive person," likely a combination of both. The beauty of meditation and yoga is that no matter what your individual combination of conditioned factors is, you can at least gain some awareness of them, and separate yourself from the "stream" of them.

>>21818653
You may find very helpful things by doing this, for example, that some of your anxiety comes from trauma and irrational associations that need to be dealt with carefully, but that now you can "focus in on" those things directly rather than having them bound up in, e.g., catastrophizing reflexes, or spirals of "panicking because you're panicking." This can work really well in tandem with talk therapy, like dialectical behavior therapy or Jungian analysis. I highly recommend a good Jungian analyst if you can find and afford one.

I also highly recommend watching videos describing Stephen Porges' polyvagal theory:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ec3AUMDjtKQ
With enough yoga and meditation, you can literally control what state your nervous system is in. You can "turn off" a panic episode, and even learn to recognize when you are merely having a conditioned reaction vs. when you are actively in control of yourself. Again, this may not work for everybody. But even people who desire or require pharmaceutical intervention can benefit from this increased awareness of one's inner life.

Once you do this, you'll realize it was like you were blind before, and now you can see. The "locus" of the self and its cone of vision is not the physical eyes, it's the center of the sensory and nervous apparatus, inside the mind. When your threshold of awareness is situated out at the edge of your mental sphere, looking out at the physical world and taking everything within the sphere as a single undifferentiated blob, you are missing 90% of the information you could potentially be evaluating unconsciously. You are letting it determine and drive you unconsciously, because it's "behind" where your vision "begins." Yoga and meditation let you step backwards progressively, and each step will reveal more and more of the "front yard" of your consciousness, which you will see is littered with trash and crap. Then you can begin cleaning it and tending it to better health. The causes of your anxiety may just be a lawnmower that ran over a garden hose long ago and never stopped making a ruckus behind you. But it's only illusorily behind you, you can actually get behind it and see it for what it is.

>>21818653
>>21818662
Thanks. This seems like alot. I have to try something. I’m desperate. Has this worked for you?

so fucking boring
his cousin Wittgenstein at least thought about interesting things
this guys is literally just
>blah blah blah markets blah blah democracy blah blah classical liberal blah blah financial blah blah

>>21818154
27

>>21813647
I can't help bring into women's feet. I don't even get why in into them but it's been like that since ei was a child

>>21816367
Its probably your biological clock urging you to reproduce. I noticed it around 24, I never had much interest in kids and then all of a sudden it was baby time

>>21818992
I too have a strange ass fetish from since i was a kid.
People like to blame porn for all degenerate shit but being a degenerate myself means I know a lot of fetishes are just there for whatever reason.
The problem is that fetishes are embraced these days. People aren't content with just being weird on their own, they need to show the world their weirdness.

Anyone been in a psych ward? How was your stay? Comfy?

>>21819020
I have been in three. The first two were comfy. The third one wasn't as nice.

>>21819020
No I went to a city one which I think are worse. I wasn't that crazy either so it wasn't fun being around actual insane people

>>21819020
Fucked a stripper from NJ within 10 minutes of meeting her. I was detoxing so I came in 30 secs and blew my load all over her panties. She was mad as hell

>>21813647
I had a dream last night in which there was a type of music playing which I have never heard before. It was fast-paced, built around a kind of clanging percussion going bom-bom bom-bom like a sort of typical African drum beat type thing, except that it was metallic/industrial sounding, and on top there was this kind of mixture of an string dirge and these rising siren noises which at their peak pitch would sound like voices warbling, with some sort of chimes or bells sounds sprinkled in at times. It was tremendously energetic and fervent and slightly carnivalesque. I've no doubt done a bad job explaining it but I'm not a musician so this is the best I could do

I should stop watching porn.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about giving up all of my ambitions and hopes and working on a farm.

>>21815526
For the record, it doesn't play anymore. Weird. All the weirder because nobody on /v/ mentioned it.

>>21818776
Don't do it instead of other healthy things, just consider doing it in addition. It changed my life and in my opinion saved it, and I've seen it do the same for others. It's like the difference between living your whole life going with whatever your first impulse is and being able to see your impulses and be aware of them, and make decisions on which ones you want to let take the helm.

Even if it doesn't solve everything, you will probably learn stuff from it that helps you think through anxiety and work on it. Like, you may not end up some Buddhist monk but learning the ins and outs of basic mindfulness meditation, and learning to visualize something like your polyvagal nervous response to stimuli (and then to visualize changing those responses), may teach you to become more mindful of your body during a panic attack. I can end an anxiety attack in minutes just by going into a basic meditative state, but it took me a few months for me to "see" what I was doing all along, become conscious of it, and learn to do it at will.

Do you think the people you know suspect you for having unorthodox political beliefs if you don't voice them at all in the company of others? People with safe, orthodox views are usually very open about their political views, so it's only logical that others would think that the only reason you are so secretive about yours is because you have something to hide from polite company. Don't think others haven't noticed you trying to dodge and squirm your way out of all their little shibboleth tests.

>>21813647
I just want everything to end.

>>21819431
Since this shit kicked off around 2012 I have developed Socrates tier abilities to get people irl to start questioning their beliefs and lead them towards crimethink. Actually Socrates isnt even the right comparison because the most essential part is to never insult them or make them mad. It doesnt work online whatsoever though you really need an irl rapport

>>21818112
He gave you bad advice and I said so. I can't believe you're writing paragraphs trying to psychoanalyze me

>>21818207
>you're paying her to leave afterwards.
I keep hearing this recently. Did some youtuber say it or something

>>21819431
I am fully out in the open with my beliefs.
Racist/sexist accusation be damned.
But then again I'm not from the U.S so there are less SSRI'd libtard woman who spazz out at you for politics.

>>21819534
Bad response.

>>21819537
I got it from this guy years ago
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0xoKiH8JJM

>>21818207
>No watching god awful Netflix shows after, no more listening to inane stories about where she traveled or who said what at her job.
You need to find better girls, not every one of them is this basic bitch NPC

>>21813647
Is my wife evil? She says she loves me more than our kids but I love our kids more than I do her?

Pitbull genocide

im seeing things again. hallucinating

>>21819754
Are you really? What kind of stuff and why, sleep deprivation, drugs, mental issues?

>>21819725
No but most are.
And he asked for the whorepill so he got it.

>>21819431
I have some of the most extreme views on most topics many of which I'm not afraid to speak about loudly unless if I'm in a very delicate situation where talking about politics isn't appropriate in any case, I find that people more often will agree, be curious about what I have to say, or not care or not even understand what I'm saying than get mad or triggered.

But lately I avoided talking politics with pretty much anyone except my closest family, twitter, some private online groups and here, not because I'm afraid to share my opinion but because I find it too tiresome to have to explain tons of background for context every single time a more complex topic arises which is bad in itself but most of the time people have no intention to even listen what I have to say so it's useless and I have no desire to talk with someone who has simplistic normie MSM propaganda understanding of these things.

Tl;dr: people in general just don't care, having a well developed world views, political, philosophical, economic even religious views is a very niche thing in modern society

>>21819504
>Actually Socrates isnt even the right comparison
Who is?

>>21813955
I love anime but I can only do a few episodes/day

>>21819762
the same things i used to see when i would get high when i was 17-19.
rats

I drank 4 beers yesterday before sleep and ate a huge meal which made me fall asleep much earlier than usual so now I'm awake at 5am instead 10/11am I usually wake up.

Ironically found out this is the easiest most consistent way for me to wake up early as it works pretty much every time and I just wish I could wake at 5 or 6 am naturally without beer or anything else.

I'm always perplexed that people remember things I said to them weeks or months ago.

I'm not sure how to work myself up into motivation. I used to write short stories a lot but lately I can't seem to work myself into it. I've been kind of disappointed with everything I've put down, which is demotivating. I know you have to work at stuff to get better at it, but it's hard to get over that sense of frustration that comes with the beginning of learning any new skill.

>>21819785
To be perfectly honest the appropriate comparison is a conman.

I first make out like I don't know much about politics and ask them to explain their ideas. This puts them in a feeling of ease and ego validation because they get to enjoy the authority of teaching and they know I'm not a threat.

Once they start explaining it you act like what they're saying is really interesting; you ask questions, act confused for a bit and ask for clarification, etc. This all makes them feel both comfortable with you as a pleasant.humble person and confident in their own political knowledge. You should do this the first few times you guys talk.

Then you have to start the sleight of hand. You start asking leading questions, the ovious answers of which point out the contradictions in their ideas. This normally provokes anger in people but when someone sees you as harmless and friendly, and interested in their genius, it will make them actually interested to figure out how their ideas might actually work, and they'll start musing out loud. This is the most important part, when you get them near enough a crime thought, bring it up *as though it were their idea*, like "woah bro you're not saying x". Theyll laugh and say of course not and offer some kind of (idiotic) reason why what they're saying isnt actually [le bad thought], but you've already brought them close to the thought, and what is most important is that you've made an emotional association between the thought and between their sense of themself as an intelligent thinker, since the whole interaction has been geared toward making them feel that way.

You then basically have to repeat this process over a period of time, and eventually start feeding them more and more ideas, but always say it like "you know what you said the other day about x" where x is actually a new idea you're presenting to them to get them further into crime thought , but you say it like its something they taught you. Soon enough theyll start connecting the dots themselves and researching crime thought on their own and you'll start to recognize the dissident people whose ideas theyre repeating.

Most people are so narcissistic and unaware of themselves that this works pretty well on them, because their new view of themself as an iconoclastic thinker who is discovering new ideas is so cool to them, and the ideas obvious truth reinforcing this sense, makes them willing to break a bit with social consensus.

>>21818293
haha, its funny because in the clip I saw, he didn't say anything about Witten that others hadn't said before.

I found the entire Rogan on DailyMotion but had to turn it off because they began by discussing Lazar, and to a seasoned amateur ufologist, "Lazar" is pretty much code for "nothing said after this point is worth listening to." If you can't tell Bob Lazar is completely full of shit, then you very likely believe other grifters and disinfo agents. I saw through his story in the 90's when I was just a child. Especially the "element 115" part. My family had a subscription to popular science and they had just run a an article about Seaborg and "the island of stability," referring to the hypothetical next element to be synthesized (115, of course.)

So when I saw a man saying he worked at Area 51 and UFOs were powered by element 115, I knew old Bob had himself to popular science as well. I mean that's a little too convenient. Sadly there are a lot of flaky people in this hobby and they'll believe just about anything.

>>21819848
*a subscription to popular science

Sorry, I wasn't intending to write anything so I just sort of cranked that out between smokes. Anyway, Lazar is full of shit.

You want to see something very unnerving, look into the countless power plant worker's testimonies and the congressional hearing if they haven't taken it down yet. Something is going on.

>>21819431
I assume people just think I'm boring. And desu, they're not wrong.

>>21813647
I think I don't really like any of my friends. I came to this realization recently when I stopped myself from answering to something idiotic a friend said, and noticed this behavior of mine became more and more frequent. "This is a waste of time, I could correct this but this is going to happen again, he/she won't learn," I repeat to myself. Most of the time it isn't even about bad decision-making abilities : I wholefully accept idiotic moves and understand that some people will discard logic over short-term benefits. I abide by the same mistakes, too, when I buy a $0.80 33cl bottle of strawberry-flavored and non alcoholic beer knowing I will down that shit in 5 minutes and not even taste it. It is funny sometimes. No, what I greatly dislike is the stupid fuck behavior everyone seems to have lately. Like talking out of their ass, not citing sources in a debate, not having experienced a situation and not basing their point of view on testimonies BUT still having an opinion on something. It's infuriating. I don't get it. I don't want to spend all of my time talking shit to people and pointing their logical fallacies but they force me to. And they never learn. I know I should focus on enjoying the good parts of someone's company but this is turning me mad. I had friends I thought more intelligent than me and decent and they keep disappointing me. They don't want to learn anything new, they're not getting better at anything, they are simply rotting like stagnant water and I can only watch helplessly. I become bitter, and insulting because I don't want to accept the obvious. I'm still considered the goofy dumbfuck of the group for now but I'm not learning anything new hanging out with them, their used-up jokes barely make me laugh anymore. I don't want to hate them so I think I need out. I need some time away but I'm afraid they will still be at the same point I left them even if I'm gone for years.

>>21817154
Things that are within your capability to accomplish come easily to you. To write otherwise would come off as conceit.
>yeah this thing I did would be actually really difficult for other people, not for me though, due to my inborn talent and intellect

Hinge's algorithm used to be good but now it only exclusively shows me girls who are out of my league. I know that its doing this because sometimes the algorithm changes and I'm exposed to the uglier girls, but it hasn't shown me any of them for weeks maybe months.

Pretty fuckin funny that the algorithm knows who is hot and who isnt though. I guess it's all based on # of interactions - I just dont get why it keeps sheparding these 10/10s into my stream when I dont even message any of them. No point in it anyway. Might be time to delete all the apps for good and get rich or die trying in the real world. I don't really look like my photos anymore anyway.

>>21819939
>Might be time to delete all the apps for good and get rich or die trying in the real world
Yes this is what you should be working on anon you know it.

>>21819843
Thanks for this detailed explanation anon.

How many people have you successfully jewpilled irl?

>>21813647
I feel conflicted. I am a Catholic and I do what is right for the most part but I cannot stand to see others who preach complete pacifism. It feels like they have tainted the ideals of the faith a promote a twisted message which is harmful and also pushes people away. The Church recognizes that self-defense and defense of others can be a legitimate and proportionate response to an unjust aggressor. The Catechism of the Catholic Church states, "Legitimate defense can be not only a right but a grave duty for one who is responsible for the lives of others. The defense of the common good requires that an unjust aggressor be rendered unable to cause harm" (CCC 2265). This should be an obvious thing, yet all you see on the internet is people calling Christians weak pacifists and twisting the "turn the other cheek" saying. I can forgive their ignorance, but when other Christians seem to be believing in complete pacifism too it becomes quite annoying. Self-defense is a duty, protecting the helpless is a duty. Fail to do either and you are guilty of sins of omission. Depending on the outcome, your passiveness can be a mortal sin. How do other catholic brothers deal with this? Am I wrong for getting so pissed off by it?

Why does my wife keep the house so fucking cold

>>21813647
Damn i was gonna jack it but pretty sure my bro was just in the bathroom probably doing the same, and now it just seems really gross and pathetic.
Guess ill have to wait till tommorow but I'm so goddamn horny.

>>21819754
I used to hallucinate a lot as a child, like almost every day. I'd see shadowy beings, hear my name being called into the basement, hear drums whenever I tried to sleep, a scary Halloween mask I had kept turning face up when I made sure it was face down, my toys were randomly broken and found in weird spots, my nightmares were incredibly lucid. I was scared in my early 20s it'd come back and turn into full schizophrenia, but I'm almost 30 and have 0 hallucinations.

>went to bed 4AM
>just woke up at 7AM
I need to go back to bed

American Christians' present a very particular façade of self confidence that I find unnerving.

>>21820115
>self confidence and magnaminity*

>>21820117
>magnanimity**

>>21820115
Do you mean faith

To clarify, I saw 3D shadowy beings, think smoke monster from Lost but more person shaped, not 2D moving shadows on the wall. I haven't seen them since I was a kid.

>>21820041
Weird thing about Catholics is that you guys refer to catechisms and councils and philosophers way more than you actually refer to the bible. Its like you have a parallel canon

>>21820125
Those were all real.

>>21820123
Don't get me started on semantics

>>21820128
What was it doing near me when I was playing with toy cars?

>>21819144
>workin on a farm
how tho askin for a fren

>>21820133
Children and the elderly are closer to the nothing from which life springs and towards which it goes. Towards the middle as life reaches its zenith the beyond fades but will return with age. Life is like a ring and in the beginnings and the ends as we draw nearer to the inevitable destination we intuit more strongly the shadow life from which we came.
The shadow did not seek anything, since to seek is for the living, but rather are blindly drawn to fresh life which can be led towards the ends of dissolution.
A tic is said to have evolved the capacity to sense blood, despite lacking eyes, it knows what is underneath and knows instinctually how to drop at the exact right moment.
Beware of any sudden change to your circulation or blood pressure, and from now on both filter and boil your water. As I know that is how it often begins...

Just started reading Nietzsche finally and I am still torn as to whether he's a midwit pseud or a genius.

>>21820188
What are you reading?

I only read Zarathustra and liked it even though I didn't fully understand it back then.

>>21820188
Eventually you'll find out he is a genius, but that he is not at all a genius philosopher, nor poet, nor "social critic." He is basically a master satirist.

>>21820191
Starting from the beginning. The Birth of Tragedy.

I drank a Monster Rehab and it made me withdrawl from my antidepressants lol

>>21820041
There's a book on this from the Orthodox perspective On Resistance to Evil by Force, it's a complex issue I'm personally of the opinion that peace should be a priority always if it can be archived trough sacrificing material things to save lives and suffering including land, but this is also a double edged sword you might end up being a victim nonetheless I'm of the opinion this is more aligned with Christian views than any slightest possibility of waging an unjust war and hurting people.

Being too eager to support "just wars" will allow the jews to keep creating opportunities that need to be met with "just wars" it will never end, but yes some situations of self defense are fully justified but I don't remember when was the last time that happened, Europe fighting against the Ottoman invasion? Most other wars can be argued to be baseless and unjustified from both sides.

Sat under a bridge and watched a train go by. Too afraid to kill myself. I guess suicide is just a fantasy. I will keep going to see the train. I probably not kill myself, but it is extremely comforting to see it go by, knowing that death is easily accessible.

On a happier note, there are so many kind people in this world. I don't deserve kindness of any sort, but every day I experience it. It makes me sick. In a way, I feel some sort of hatred kindling when people are kind to me, hatred for I know not what. Certainly not for the giver of kindness, and certainly not for myself, for there is already an abundant supply in that regard.
I almost fell to the ground at the bridge thinking about the kindness I experienced the other day. I feel like I stole something, or maybe I've been put into some sort of inescapable debt... God free me.

>>21820294
I'm the opposite. I feel I deserve kindness but receive none. Where do you live that people aren't soulless and rude?

going to body massage today
and get my dick properly massaged

>>21820296
I get heckled and insulted from time to time, but that's normal. Being rude has 'no weight.' I'm just glad I haven't been mugged or beaten. As for kindness, it's sort of like an effluence that I don't really understand. It's just the way a cashier smiles, maybe, that makes me feel terrible for being such as I am.

Two kinds of shallowness. We have an idea of the main notion of what it means to like another person for shallow reasons, which necessarily implies its opposite as depth. This is the enjoyment of a person for their accomplishments, which are deemed free, voluntary actions and therefore allegedly more indicative of the quality of the soul or spirit of the person. This kind of shallowness receives its essence from the proverb, “never judge a book by its cover.” This is the proverbial wisdom given to us all from a young age, which children are clever and silly enough to largely reject. Children want flashy, visually appealing covers on their books. Under this assessment of worth, all value attributed to a person necessarily belongs least to that person, in that the person has acquired these worths in a similar way as one acquires objects or possessions. They are vestigial attachments one might forget or lose at a future time. Plato ranks the possession of goods as the lowest form of virtue, below virtues of the body (beauty/strength) and soul (psychological/intellectual goodness). The shallowness of enjoying a person for their acquisitions, whether they are learning, knowledge, skills, hobbies, and so on, is clearly on display, because they are very much like acquisitions which do not depend in the slightest on any deeper reasons. In a broader context, we do not typically attribute value to that which is chosen arbitrarily and on a whim, to that which has no particular reason for its being one way or another apart from personal whim. On the other hand, the other kind of shallowness, discussed below, has nothing to do with personal whim, rather it is what is responsible for personal whim, without itself being whim.

[1/3]

>>21820311
The opposite kind of shallowness is what is actually known as shallow according to folk wisdom. This is the value of a person arising from their physical appearance, and even the congenital or immutable characteristics of their personality, to an extent. This is the most powerful motivator of attraction in the vast majority of individuals, if not all, and it progresses according to its own internal hierarchy of value judgements. I will make a sketch so the reader has an inkling of what I mean, and although this could be subject to amendment and is not an extensive picture, it might even vary slightly on an individual level, while still keeping the general picture. The first and least important value is the ethnicity and racial background of the person. The second value is the shape and fitness of the body and musculature, which also includes any deformations of the skeletal structure, and so on. The third value is the physical health of the person, diseases, pathologies, etc. The fourth and highest value is the shape and structure of the face and skull, which can potentially outstrip all of these prior factors if it is sufficiently beautiful. The facial shape (not to be confused with phrenology) also provides the “missing link” between the general categories of body and soul, or psyche. According to the Germans, die Augen sind Fenster zur Seele, this means, “the eyes are windows to the soul.” This should not be misunderstood as referring solely to the eyes, as I can present images with the shape of the nose altered which affects how the viewer perceives the eyes, the latter of which are the same in each picture, rather this refers to the predominance of the eyes in our perception of others. It is where we focus our attention (we often enough mistake what it is we are actually judging through this kind of fixation, where we mistake multiple things as one thing. The sense of sight is notorious for creating this kind of error in judgment).
[2/3]

>>21820313
We now arrive at the direct connection between the body and mind, more particularly the facial structure and the mind. Although it is quite fair to say that the rest of the body is also more or less directly associated with the mind as well, although in lesser degrees of importance (according to the same hierarchy I enumerated just before). If a person is overweight, we are likely to make a reasonable judgment about the state of their mind, although we have a smaller chance of being correct compared to other methods and it will also tell us less about them as a person, as the shape of the body is less directly connected to the mind than the shape of the face. Likewise for disease, ethnicity, and so on. So there is a sense in which the orders of the body, in descending order, manifest the qualities of the mind, and not in the shallow sense described previously of acquisitions of knowledge and skills. Acquisition of knowledge doesn’t change one’s facial structure or make one more likely to lose weight (in this case it is largely a matter of willpower; very few would willingly choose to be overweight if there were no drawbacks to the choice), and so on. On the other hand, one’s facial structure, as most directly associated with the mind or spirit, provides the best estimation of what one is likely to acquire, but more importantly provides us with a detection of the basic essential qualities of their spirit, rather than the contingent and less important “acquisitions” which might or might not be a result of it.

>>21820314
>>21820313
>>21820311
SHUT THE FUCK UP!

>>21820324
Do you have any constructive criticism or is that it?

>>21820332
Stop spamming up the board with your nonsense

>>21820341
What about it is nonsense?

>>21820344
Everything

i came across a small clip from caribbean rythms where bap talks about romance, the op saying it was one of the best literary passages of the last fifty years, how euphoric he felt listening to it, i clicked it and the guy just sounds fucking ridicolous. his accent is so faggy and retarded. i can't take this shit seriously. i need to look for something else.

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f0ojzXv65W0
new murlocs

I must accept that I was never good enough. I did the best I could with what I had at the time (psyche, resilience, discipline, information), scant as it was. This is indeed the best outcome.
I could still be good. Maybe not today or tomorrow or even next month. I could still grow. I could become proficient. I could become excellent again. I had that once. But it's so fickle for me. It's not my nature. I'm just an average person who has the chance to excel if he works consistently. Is all. If I so much as let my focus flicker for a moment, the momentum is gone.

>>21820430
He's a weird homosexual jew who's afraid of doxing himself so he masks his voice.
What is it you're looking for?

Did you ever find identifying yourself with a fictional literally character to an uncany level?

>>21820572
I always do this to some extent

>>21820572
Yeah, the notes from underground protag

>>21820586
Why is that seems like the worst character to identify with, are you doing anything to change that?

>>21820606
Slowly trying to hate life enough so that suicide feels like the best option out of all courses

>>21820612
Im not >>21820612 but his post is very similar to my current state.

>>21820612
>>21820616
Why not try to love life instead, there's beauty literally everywhere you look and by giving up you give the power to everything you hate, that upsets you that makes you feel miserable.

By taking action on the other hand you will actively fight against it and inevitably defeat it one way or another.

>>21820572
Travice Bickle from Taxi Driver. Literally me.

new
>>21820659

>>21820313
>According to the Germans, die Augen sind Fenster zur Seele, this means, “the eyes are windows to the soul.”
No. Earliest direct window reference for eyes is French and all the western ones probably come from
>ut imago est animi voltus sic indices oculi

>>21820678
That's interesting, I didn't say it was the first reference, though. Thanks for the reference to Latin.

>>21820696
It's Cicero. Shakespeare's grabbing it from French tradition is why it's popular in a lot of places still, because it was kind of already like a pop song reference when he snagged it but those poets aren't as popular now.

>>21820643
>Why not try to love life instead,
That was my default way of living until I was 30. It made me gradually spiral into this state after realizing that love is unreciprocated unless you have things other people want. Which is disgusting, and justifies hate of this materialism.

>>21820643
I cannot give nor receive love. Im an outsider in this world.

>>21820789
>>21820709
I just went for a hike to the local hill, there's a small church there and a restaurant. Took me about 35 minutes of walking even though I'm totally out of shape and my quads are sore as hell from the squats I did after after a long time two days ago. I went alone because no one else wanted to join me.

And man do I feel good now that I'm back, tired in the best possible way but completely energized and none of that lethargic laziness anymore.

I swear to God action is the key to overcome your problem, you start with something as simple as light exercise or a walk and you will gradually add more until tackling your actual problems step by step doesn't seem that hard or impossible anymore.

I also met a lot of nice cats that wanted me to pet them and two hot young momies that smiled, said hi and probably wanted me to "pet" them too if you catch my drift, but that's not my thing.

Tl;dr: only ACTION beats inertia and lethargy.