/lit/ - Literature

>>20382386
Gardner, you finally overdid it with the relentless fake 5-star reviews...and now begins the backlash, you fucking idiot.
https://www.reddit.com/r/books/comments/uqq77c/most_blatant_example_of_fake_positive_reviews_ive/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Yes, but that's a bad thing.

These retards are probably using they’re real names lol

Why are you asking a question you know the answer to? Yes.

>>20382386
I prefer the movie adaptation
https://youtu.be/P3ynj6w2tII

Nope, just a grift pulled by some overweight manbaby retard who still lives with his mom and dad.

>>20382424

god i would take the nerdrage of 4chan over Reddit any day. they're so smug and self-satisfied in their vigilance. you just know they're patting themselves on the back after leaving each one star review of some insignificant meme writer who doesn't even matter.

>>20382550
yeah, that's the sad reality.

It’s the best horror novel of the decade. That’s for sure.

The only thing it’s good for is separating between sincere posters and unironic paid shills. Anyone with something positive to say can only be shilling.

Finna post Call of the Crocodile threads on /biz/

CotC is really the only "so bad it's good" book I've ever read. And it's not even bad the way some middle schooler's fanfiction is bad, it's bad in a way that is utterly engrossing in the originality of its badness.

>>20382820
cleanse your soul, Gardner. delete those fake reviews.

>>20382424
>aaron arm

>>20382820
Failed this>>20382622 test; hi Frank!

>>20382861
>>20382889
Gardner is like a Karate master he could probably kick your ass

>>20382820
Failed this>>20382745 test; Hi Frank!
Does your father know where all his money is going?

>>20382895
ah right, I forgot you are a volunteer taekwondo instructor and call yourself a “teacher”
fuck, you’re like a cartoon character. why don’t you just commit to the Chris Chan lolcow thing? You might actually get famous that way

>>20382820
The twist was honestly great. All of the books I’ve read of his build up to weird twists. I think they’re fine for pulp horror which is clearly what they are.

>>20382921
>the twist
the classic shill identifier, along with comparing the books to goosebump or (in the alternative, once people actually start to read the book) saying it’s all a joke like the book version of the room
does it feel strange to know that we’re more familiar with your half assed attempts at pretending to be someone else than your actual work? Maybe if you spent time on the work and not on the shilling it would be the other way

>>20382925
Bruh. Why goosebumps for adults make you so mad? Is it because you know you could have easily done the exact same thing and become a household name?

>>20382820
Somebody posted this excerpt in /wg/ today and it was so bad that it gave me new insight into how to structure paragraphs

>>20382940
You can’t write, you don’t even like to read. You failed film school because you’re a failure, simple as. there is nothing unique or interesting going on in your head, and just because your rich dad buys 4chan ads for you doesn’t change any of that.

>>20382953
It’s funny because in the cotc shill threads no one posts the actual text, but in threads where people actually do everyone unanimously agrees it’s trash aahahahaha

>>20382921
They’re twist heavy yea. That’s why I like em XD

>12 posters, 22 replies

Saw Lewis Woolston really venting some hatred for Gardner the other week and I have to agree with the sentiment:
Gardners really fucked up any hope other amateur writers have of seeing any sort of appreciation here, because of his stupid greed everyone is accused of shilling even for just mentioning a book that isn’t normally discussed here. Pretty ugly what one narcissistic faggot can do to a whole community of readers. Fuck you Gardner.

>>20382861
I'm not Gardener and am honestly actively averse to all the obvious shilling than wannabes like Card and Waldun did following in his footsteps. It helps that Gardner is so-bad-it's-good whereas all the other /lit/ self-shillers look just plain bad.

>>20382978
Call of the Arcade’s twist was baffling. These books really are “The Room” of literature. I unironically love them at this point. The books are dead serious and come to the most bizarre conclusions I could never even guess.

>>20382969
No one actually tries to argue that it's not trash. It's objectively trash, just entertaining at the same time. The way Gardner misuses commas is almost its own form of outsider art.

Croc is the only one I've read and I'm almost averse to reading his newer books like Jigoku because people have said he "fixed them" which means they probably just became slightly more polished turds at the expense of losing their distinctive character.

>>20383036
So Gardner’s new books are terrible because they DONT have misused commas now?
Lmao.

>>20383007
>>20383026
>>20383036
All of these are Frank Gardner.
You’re a repulsive creature Frank, truly.

No shit after listening to that interview of his im convinced he’s just a pedophile playing the long game. Apparently he “teaches,” and is clearly dealing with serious psychological delusions and childish obsessions. Exact type of person to molest a bunch of children and get away with it

Based Frank living rent free in the minds of /lit/ shizos

>>20383069
Based Frank living rent free in mommy and daddy’s mansion*

>>20382995
>Gardners really fucked up any hope other amateur writers have of seeing any sort of appreciation here

No there was never any hope I always tell people advertising to kill themselves, etc. and its always been like that for years. Literally every social media platform in existence is designed for that sort of thing.
i told gardner too but at least he became a “4chan guy” and not like a legit eceleb with a youtube revenue stream.

>>20383073
He makes poorfags seethe too, even more based than I previously thought

>>20383061
Can’t say much but I actually knew Frank growing up and I can say this is absolutely the correct read on him. He was always a creep and spent a lot of time around kids worryingly young. I imagine he shills here to try and attract dumb, shy kids for grooming. Also I hear he’s active on discord, so…

>>20383100
Is this for real?

>>20383100
Yeah and I bet your dad works at Microsoft

>>20383100
>Call of the Groomer

>>20383050
There's a peak of "so-bad-it's-good," then a low valley of just bad, then a gradual ascent of being earnestly good. Gardner's prose shedding its retarded mannerisms would be progressing further into the valley of just bad.

>>20383155
ULTRA KEK

>>20383088
Hahhahahah

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HsLfrpEAfB8

>F Gardner interview has thousands of views

Weird to think the biggest writer from 4chan is a flat earther. Actually no.....that’s not weird considering this place.

>>20383852
>F Gardner interview has thousands of views
because the redditors wanted to hear what a pathological grifter sounds like

More like Call of the Crock-o'-shit.

>46 replies, 16 posters
I think this is enough to start just auto reporting any Gardner post or thread as advertising or spamming. I can't figure out IRC to talk to a moderator.

>>20382386

>>20383962
Memes aside i actually enjoyed Call of the Arcade a lot. The guys talking about the twists stuff aren’t kidding. I’ve read a couple of them and this was my favorite of the lot.

>film adaptation can't even get the animal right

>>20383100
I've met him a couple times through mutual friends and he's always given me the creeps. No eye contact, mumbles, stares at the floor etc. No idea if he's a pedo or not but he's definitely creepy and it wouldn't surprise me.

>>20384289
He has a huge cock though.

>>20384289
he's just shy.

>>20382386
Fuck off Gardner you utter hack, I own this board now

>>20383852
Based

>>20382550
See at least the call of the crocodile memes are positive and help this autistic writer feel like he won something. Redditors have such an intense need to tear everything down.

>>20384267
Source?

>>20384212
: |

>>20385399
god shit the fuck up Frank, you do realize how blatant and obvious it is that you’re literally the ONLY ONE doing damage control in your own shill thread, and it looks like now you’ll really have to considering you’re being outed as a fucking pedophile (no surprise there)
die.

>>20385605
Call of the Crocodile : the motion picture

>>20382953
I’ve never read his books but I listened to the audiobook on YouTube. I don’t think anything about the story was actually all that original. Like a long creepypasta that doesn’t feel like it’s going anywhere. It’s funny to hear the errors narrated though.

Hey Gardner if you're lurking can you do a novel adaptation of this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0ximxe4XtU

Goodreads has finally purged the fake shill accounts Gardner created, dropping the average rating of CotC down to an appropriate 2.72/5.

>>20386793
lol the only five star ones left say sneed or some retarded shit
Gardnerfags on suicide watch

Gardner, did Goodreads actually communicate with you and warn you not to make any more puppet accounts, or are you able to keep making fake reviews?

>>20386275
Listened to it too when I was driving by Chicago. The errors take me out of it so I guess I was able to get invested in the story a few times. The guy needs to read another one because traffic outside that hell hole is horrendous.

>>20382386
idk but judging by this interview man is the quintessential 4channer. Dude's literally a chainsmoking flat earther weeb https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsLfrpEAfB8

>>20387459
Seriously, how much is this man paying for fake ass reviews?
How has it not been caught yet? He has over 1,000 reviews on good reads and hasn’t even sold (not free copies) over 1,000 copies of his book.
Before anyone mentions free downloads can still review, yes they can, but the rate of purchases to reviews is 1 in 50-100, and free downloads is about 1 in 500-1000.

>>20388084
Based

Holy shit he's actually here

>>20388332
You’re just now figuring this out?

>>20388087
well, check again. because either Gardner listened and deleted those 1000s of 5-star ratings...
or somehow enough people complained to Goodreads and they flushed all the fakes.
of course he's parked on these threads...so what an absolute maniac waste of time, Gardner. seriously, get your shit together, dude.

>>20388087
Even cumulatively among his eleven books, Gardner now has well under a thousand reviews on Goodreads. The legion of shill accounts made by Gardner himself in a sad attempt to signal boost his absolutely awful books have been purged. It's likely his fraud took so much time and effort that he would have been better off working a minimum wage job, but let's not forget that this is F. Gardner, a semi-retarded pedophile, so even holding down a job as a busboy is probably beyond his ability. Gardner, if you're reading this, I sincerely hope you kill yourself. Your brains splattered over a blank page would be a better piece of writing than anything you've published thus far.

>>20388519
>pedophile
proofs?

>>20388536
Read the thread, retard.

>>20388536
I went to the same school as him and I remember times when he was acting weird with some way younger kids. Doesn't suprise me he's a pedo.

>>20388519
>It's likely his fraud took so much time and effort that he would have been better off working a minimum wage job

What's really funny is that his Dad has gotten in trouble for petty corruption multiple times. The whole family are slimy grifters

For some back story check this out:
>>/lit/thread/S19759912#p19767536
https://southsideweekly.com/something-in-the-water/

>>20388084
Incredibly based

>>20388643
Jesus, that article in particular is a brutal takedown. How fucking sad do you have to be to try to get elected with your mommy as a running mate? And even then, you still fail. To top it all off, you publish a picture that screams "don't leave me alone with your kids, your wallet, or any baked goods." It's Ls all the way down.

>>20388695
kek

How are the the other books?

>>20389030
go to bed, Gardner.

>>20389030
Arcade is good.

>>20382953
>child thinks "in Chicago"
>he's a boy, a kid in Chicago
then
>sitting Indian style
>his legs were crisscrossed
beginning has
>man I wish I was somewhere cooler
then the end
>man I wished in the cooler world of these cards
lmao

>>20382386
I haven't been here in three years THREE YEARS
And you mean to TELL me that this guy's book is still being shilled??

>>20389030
I enjoyed his books so much, he's an amazing author. Now let me think, I remember reading (and loving) the following (also of his Horror's Call series, going 11 books strong and all near 4-5 star ratings!):
>Hunger of the Kangaroo, https://www.amazon.com/Hunger-Kangaroo-Horrors-Call-Gardner-ebook/dp/B098KN7Q6W/ref=sr_1_3?keywords=f+gardner&qid=1652971001&sr=8-3
>Ouroboros, https://www.amazon.com/Ouroboros-Horrors-Call-F-Gardner-ebook/dp/B09JVCYK5F/ref=sr_1_4?keywords=f+gardner&qid=1652971001&sr=8-4
>Jigoku, https://www.amazon.com/Jigoku-Horrors-Call-F-Gardner-ebook/dp/B098KLWVZ3/ref=sr_1_5?keywords=f+gardner&qid=1652971001&sr=8-5
>Call of the Cherokee, https://www.amazon.com/Call-Cherokee-Horrors-F-Gardner-ebook/dp/B08KHR567X/ref=sr_1_8?keywords=f+gardner&qid=1652971001&sr=8-8
>Call of the Cradle, https://www.amazon.com/Call-Cradle-Horrors-F-Gardner-ebook/dp/B08KQC6H2H/ref=sr_1_13?keywords=f+gardner&qid=1652971001&sr=8-13
>Call of the Arcade, https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08KFP46ZM/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i9
>Reptilian Odyssey, https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B098KMXD23/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i8
>Limbo's Rainbow, https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09K4D3X7J/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i5
>Call of the Crocodile (I know you already mentioned it but I figured I might as well help people who want to buy it), https://www.amazon.com/Call-Crocodile-Horrors-F-Gardner-ebook/dp/B08KFJG9KW/ref=sr_1_1?crid=22C5LQKAJUKXP&keywords=call+of+the+crocodile&qid=1652971279&s=digital-text&sprefix=call+of+the+crocodil%2Cdigital-text%2C156&sr=1-1
>Call of the Kappa, https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08KFLTQQD/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i2
and lastly,
>call of F. Gardner, https://www.amazon.com/Call-F-Gardner-Horrors-ebook/dp/B09M8TXHY1/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=f+gardner&qid=1652971001&sr=8-2
You can copy and paste the links to buy them on Amazon :)

If you like the author as much as I do, I suggest checking out his amazon profile for more, https://www.amazon.com/F-Gardner/e/B08KFQR689/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_ebooks_1 , to keep updated on what I write :)

>>20382550
4chan rage killed 10 people last week but I guess to each their own

>>20390310
Thanks. Gonna check them out.

>>20390612
>>20390310
Stop talking to yourself you fucking weirdo

>>20382386
CotC is a great horror book despite what anyone else says. It's has the prose of worthless 4chan inspired goosebumps book but the twist, plot and stmosphere make it a worthwile read, specially since it can be read in 2 hours easily.

>>20390671
CotC is a fuckin masterpiece.

>>20390671
>>20390754
Lol I’ve been watching, you started throwing for reviews at your GR page you slimy rat. You’re a sad fucking joke.

>>20390779
throwing more reviews*

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-XqMrk296uo

This poor bastard gave Gardner more than he deserves, an honest and in depth critique. Skip through to see what he says about the “twist”

>>20390754
Call of the Arcade is so much better though. I’m not really sure why CotC is the one /lit/ raves about.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HsLfrpEAfB8

Gardner sounds like such a cool dude. I can’t wait to see what the man writes next.

>>20382861
No need, Goodreads deleted them for him. Down from a 5.0 to a 2.7

Gardner basically churns out random books and then buys commercials on 4chan. And then you guys buy his books

>>20382424
>as a former /lit/ member that wasn't a part of this particular exercise, i apologize. they're not all bad, some of the discussions on that board were fantastic and a lot of the memes/meta memes were funny, too.
fucking kill yourself

>>20391032
/thread.

F Gardner is a living pulp horror producing machine.

>>20391251
No let’s keep the thread going just so anyone Gardner’s tried to grift can see the truth: he’s a hack, a shill, a samefag, possibly a predator, and undeniably a boring and unskilled writer.

>>20391251
>living pulp horror producing machine
Wow, you really misspelled the word "retard."

>>20391268
F Gardner probably has one of the highest IQ’s on this board. He was the first person to write and market books here.

>>20391282
But the books are shit and people don’t buy/like them, Frank. What kind of accomplishment is this? Especially considering your dad pays for all the ads

>>20382386
Yes. Because it has the most original twist ever conceived.

>>20391003
I think the first Gardner book is the one you'll like the most because he reuses the same plot elements and bad prose in all of them. Out of the ones I've read (CotC, CotA, Reptilian Odissey) I think Croc is the better one, specially because The twist makes you, for like 3 pages, think that Gardner's bad prose, spelling mistakes and creepypasta like story are a masterful setup for the existential horror twist. It saldy isn't because he keeps repeating the same mistakes afterwards. I do still think the atmosphere of Gardner's books is comfy if you were into creepypastas as a child or remember 2000s internet fondly.

>>20391307
Are you sure people don't buy them?

>>20385622
What do these numbers mean? Is this guy just shilling his own book on here?

>>20391658
It means for the 55 posts, there were 21 original IPs posting. Now we stand at 107, with 44 people posting. So yes, the author of this book is incessantly posting about his book pretending to be other people.

>>20391689
There's no way it really is him. He can't possibly lack that much self-awareness.

>>20391399
I liked the twist too. Gardner keeps doing the whole “meta” thing for the twists. They’re done differently but he seems to really like doing that for whatever reason.

>>20390325
yeah and the Japanese bombed Whirl Lager. old news, faggot.

>>20391700
Give the posts a read; you’ll notice there are basically two parties, (1) people who are venting frustration or disgust with the shilling, in general agreement and attempting to respond to the second group, and (2) people posting variations of the same blandly positive remarks about “I like the twist!” and other trite shit. Yes, he’s honestly entirely tuned out the entire world and just shills on autopilot now. No awareness whatsoever.

Ok that’s it. I’m reading this series and going to talk about them on my YouTube channel. This is a potential goldmine.

>>20391757
That’s basically the authors hope: get people talking at any cost and take in what money falls his way.
So do it, I guess, but then the grifter wins.

>>20391761
I don’t think he’s a grifter. His books are 99 cents so I doubt he’s even making money. Making videos about these books would benefit me. So I don’t really care if it helps or harms Gardner. Surprised more people haven’t jumped on this. 11 books is a lot of content to work with.

>>20391757
I’m gonna try to beat you to it.

>>20390325
Sorry sweety but that was actually Twitch and Discord rage. You've just been deboonked.

>>20385684
>you’re being outed as a fucking pedophile
no cap?

>>20391777
No, he’s a grifter: he only “writes” so that he can have something to sell, and he’s actively trying to manipulate the opinion of him by lying, hence the purged GR reviews. Honestly you not seeing how obvious that is now has me suspecting your him lol, that’s pretty much a textbook grift.
Anyways check that article about his dad being a corrupt politician trying to gift Frank a job. The scamming runs in the family.

>>20391795
fr fr ong Franky g was grooming kids on discord yo

>>20391757
Post it here when you do.

>>20391808
Slander. F Gardner exclusively dates other adult men like the flamboyant homosexual he is.

F Gardner is from Chi-Town?

>>20391898
Yes.

More like greatest novel of the decade.

Memeing F Gardner to fame is the funniest thing this board has ever accomplished.

>>20383100
Lmao i hate river forest cucks so much its unreal.

>>20392343
>to fame
pre summer faggotry? kill yourself, retard.

Yes. It is the memebook that somehow keeps giving.

How does Gardner put up with the fact he makes so much fake reviews and jerks himself off about how great his books are in any of these threads. Like we know it's you, you don't even change how to write.

>>20390325
It was streamed ok twitch, not 4chin sweaty

>>20382386
No, but it is sadly the best novel any /lit/ anon would make.