/lit/ - Literature

No. Play shit games, get shit prices.

>>20310614
It's not a crime if you don't get caught

Crime and Punishment

>>20310614
Fantomas

>>20310630
/thread

>>20310630
Nice
>>20310614
I think even if we recommended you a good book on the subject matter, posting a thread on 4chan such as this would probably be among the first recommendations the author would make.

>>20310614
The Communist Manifesto

Tell me what crime you'd like to commit and I will advise you, anon

>>20310614
The one by Sam Hyde

>>20310952
based anon too paranoid to post the title

>>20310768
Cunny

>>20310768
OP here, Can't tell you

>>20310952
AW GEEZ, DUDE
HAVE I GOT A STORY FOR YOU
CAN YOU SPARE 20 MINUTES?

>>20310614

One way is to not purchase or check out a book on getting away with crime

>>20310614
Anarchist's Cookbook. Or those old timey perfect crime locked room detective stories I guess

>>20310768
asking at a fast-food restaurant for a water-cup then filling it with soda

>>20310614
Basically all about how attractive you are and how you carry yourself. Reminder that one of those homo serial killers convinced the cops to let him go home with his victim because he claimed they were just having a homo domestic dispute.

>>20312075

First make yourself non threatening, be nice polite helpful to everyone in the neighbourhood. Be an upstanding member of society, always pay your rent on time etc.

Then pick up hookers and crack their skulls with a hammer, use gloves of-course. No need to hide the body, once found no one will care, the police will just put it in cold case.

If you try to kill your enemies, e.g. some bully from the past. You will most likely get caught. You won't be suspected since you're Ned Flanders, but you will make a mess and leave evidence all over the victim.

A good place to start is Abbie Hoffman's classic "Steal This Book."

the nsa already have a lead on you, expect the qt3.14 tradcath online "gf" messages in a hour.

>>20312075
The perfect crime

>>20310614
I was just like the guy in pic rel as a 6th grader when I went to a haunted house that pulled out all the stops. My younger brother and older female cousin were also there. I, a young boy, was the leader of a train of people holding onto hoodies. It was my cousin, brother, some young women, and a grown-ass man who formed a line behind me. I didn't cry out or anything of the sort, but the people behind me did. Some were in tears. I'm proud of myself that night. I did well for a kid, especially an anxious one whose dealt with various demons since earliest youth. I'm saving pic rel.

>>20313112
>>20313112
The glowies banned my favorite racist ethots because these hoes kept harassing black women (who I also was flirting up in their DMs)

>>20310614
The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Baby Boom Home Owner's Association Bylaws

>>20314444
Checked

>>20310768
a detective once asked a mathematician to calculate the trajectory of a stray bullet that shot through a roof. he came back with a parameter, and sure enough, the bullet was within that radius. Now imagine you use math to predict it. now imagine you shoot like 20 to cover all your bases. now imagine you get really good at this on minecraft

Go fuck yourself you glowie.
Lord Arthur Savile's Crime

>>20314495
Going on my to-read list.
Devil's advocate sort of arguments are my favorite.

>>20314321

>>20310614
he doesn't want you to use it for crimes but basically can be used for crimes

>>20310627
you have a shockingly poor grasp of logic

>>20310630
>>20310634
>>20310654
how the fuck is Crime and Punishment what OP is asking for? have you even read it? Rodion is not only tormented by what he did, but he arouses suspicion left & right throughout the novel, only to confess his crimes to a literal prostitute because he thought she was just as bad as him, and she also happens to be the friend of one of the people he killed.
if anything C&P is a guide on what NOT to do if you want to get away with a crime, dude didn't even do the crime properly, he just killed two people but was so scared he fled before even stealing the money he came for in the first place

>>20315337
They probably just saw the word "crime" on the post and recommended the only book containing it in the title that they could think of.
Most people on /lit/ do not read, that is common knowledge.

>>20315165
you have shockingly poor grasp of real life

>>20315342
Speak for yourself fag

>>20314459
lol

>>20315480

>>20310627
That is the only holy commandment when you become a criminal. The only since is getting caught.

>>20315337
Just do everything the opposite way then, there is your guide.

>>20317089
>don't commit crime
>tell everyone you committed a crime
>in the end you are found innocent

>>20310988
ToT

>>20315165
it literally isn't, crime only exists in relation to the society and it's ethical/legal system, it doesn't have inherent ontological value. Kill yourself.

Crime doesn't have tutorials aside from how to buy drugs from the actual criminals.
The whole point of crime is to know how to do crime without getting caught. If you write a book about it then the police know about it too and you have to find a new way.

>>20310614

>>20318039
What means?

>>20317887
>it doesn't have inherent ontological value
Neither does money, yet you won't sit here and pretend as if it doesn't govern our social relations.
And crime is a broad range of actions, some may not be as morally apprehensive as others, you'd surely be overcome with guilt even if you're never caught depending on the severity of what you did and assuming you're a normal human being, so yes crime is still crime regardless of getting caught or not.

>>20317138
>in the end you are found innocent
Once you confess it's over regardless of your innocence, unless the actual criminal steps up to free you no one will bother looking for him

>>20318311
A lot of traditions in modern Christianity were taken from pagans, which goes against the scriptures.

>>20310768
Murder and drug dealing. Corruption of officials too.

>>20318039
XD

>>20317917
I worked at a fast foot job in high school and saw a qt probably my age doing it in front of me when I was working sandwich line. She saw me noticing and froze up a bit. Then I smirked at her sort of awkwardly and she giggled to herself. Best day I had in a while desu.

>>20312075
I worked at a fast foot job in high school and saw a qt probably my age doing it in front of me when I was working sandwich line. She saw me noticing and froze up a bit. Then I smirked at her sort of awkwardly and she giggled to herself and walked back to her table. Made my week desu. So basically that or just don't give a fuck like picrel kek

I got caught committing what could've been a crime if my friend's parents reported it, and framed someone else who had no way of getting punished. I texted my friend if he wanted to buy some weed I didn't feel like smoking. His parents saw the phone. They were extremely religious and he was 16 so they mine and said they would consider reporting it even though I doubt they would. But my parents were so livid and were going to take my phone, ground me, all that shit. Plus I couldn't see my bud anymore. I made up a story on the spot: some drug dealer in town was harassing me to arrange a sale for him just once since his buddies bought me gas when I forgot my credit card - I was scared. We lived in a rough town and there were lots of random junkies in the area but they still reacted like I thought they were stupid.

So I went on Omegle back when people my age switched kik accounts for nudes. This was like 2014. Created a fake profile, used a random girl's profile using online photos/nudes. Found a guy from a random state on my first attempt. Sent him a couple nudes, then in the middle I asked for a favor and gave him some contorted reason to help text my friend's number a video of himself saying vague shit "hey sorry for offering you that earlier dude he was bullying me to sell it for him like he was with anon and other guys because he helped me with some favors and he got caught selling once so he's been making others do it for him" to my friend's number in the middle of the night where he had to leave it before going to bed. Told the Omegle dude if he sent that and deleted the number he texted our chat I'd send him more nudes. He was horny as a motherfucker and did it no questions asked. Sent some more nudes then blocked his number.

Friend's family saw it the next morning and were shocked I was right the whole time. My parents and the kid's family felt so bad for me they would give me food whenever I came over and ask if I was still being bullied by people. I hung it over my parents' head for a while when they suspected me of random shit too. Felt like the smartest motherfucker in the world I swear.

>>20310614
Don't read anything. Blacks don't read and they get away with all sorts of shit. Be more black by not reading.

>>20319663
is that why they're so overwhelmingly represented in jail cells?
truth is most criminals never really get caught, homicide clearing rates are always below 50% in almost every county in the US, chances are you're probably working with a murderer in your company and you'd never know it

>>20310614
Crime and no punishment

>>20319670
>is that why they're so overwhelmingly represented in jail cells?
Their capacity to commit crime overwhelms their capacity to get away with it.
>>20319670
>chances are you're probably working with a murderer in your company and you'd never know it
>working
ok, lmao

>>20319670
This is true, an old guy in my workplace was arrested last year for possession & distribution of cp, dude was really nice and I would've never suspected he was a pedo
he was in his 50s and still single though, I guess a man without a family past his 50s does raise some redflags