/lit/ - Literature

>>20269050
fake

Sive et caupe

>>20269050
>Quessé ça

Bonjour mon ami Pierre

Je sais que tu me veux
Oh oui moi je te veux
Par devant par derrière
Par devant par derrière
Pour soulager ta queue
Pour soulager ma queue
Dont tu n'es pas peu fier
Dont je ne suis pas peu fier

Mais si t'as pas de capote

mets la dans ta culotte
j'suis désolée mon pote
que le sexe t'emporte
Mais si t'as pas de capote
pas question que tu me saute
de moi t'auras nonotte
Vaut mieux que tu te tripoootte

Salut cousin Patrick

Je rêve que tu me baise
Tu veux que je te baise ?
Comme une chienne lubrique !
Comme une chienne lubrique ?
Car tes couilles me plaisent !
C'est vrai que mes couilles plaisent
Puis t'as souvent la trique
Pour ça oui j'ai la trique

Mais si t'as pas de capote

Remet la dans ta culotte
j'suis désolée mon pote
que le sexe t'emporte
Mais si t'as pas de capote
pas question que tu me saute
de moi t'auras nonotte
Vaut mieux que tu te tripotte

Dis nous belle Véronique

tu as le feu au cul !
Oui j'ai le feu au cul !
Tu veux que l'on te nique ?
Je veux que l'on me nique
Alors fous-toi toute nue !
Oh oui, vite,vite toute nue !
Et passe nous du plastique !
J'en ai plus en boutique...

Quoi ??? Si t'as pas de capote

remets donc ta culotte
Désolé ma cocotte
que le sexe t'emporte
Mais si t'as pas de capote
pas question qu'on te saute
De nous t'auras nonotte
vaut mieux que tu te tripotte...
Ah ah Ahahahahaha,
(Oh non venez
Ne m'laissez pas comme ça)
(J'ai envie)
(Revenez me faire l'amour)
Quoi si t'as pas d'capote
(Patrick! Pierre! Allez basedez sympa)
Remet donc ta culotte
Désolé ma cocotte
(Maintenant que j'ai enlevé mon slip)
Que le sexe t'emporte
(Je suis toute mouillée)
Mais si t'as pas d'capote
(Vous voulez pas?)
(c'est pas juste)
Pas question qu'on te saute
(Maintenant faut y aller)
De nous t'auras nonotte
(j'en rêve)
Vaux mieux que tu t'tripotte
(Allez y j'vous en pris,
faite moi l'amour! j'en peux plus!)
(Allez)
Quoi, si t'as pas d'capote
Remet donc ta culotte
Désolée ma cocotte
Que le sexe t'emporte
Mais si t'as pas de capote
Pas question qu'on te saute
De nous t'auras nonotte

>>20269050
>criticizes the French language
>simps for Brie Larsen
NGMI

>>20269050

>>Qu'est-ce que c'est que ça ?
>>What is it that it's that that?

More like "What is it that THIS is?"

>>20269050
>Qu'est-ce que c'est que ça ?
>Qu'est-ce que c'est ?
>Qu'est-ce ?
>C'est quoi ?
>Quoi ?
>Hein ?

>>20269050
>French word for lampshade
>abat jour
>abat=slaugher/kill/murder/strike down/knock off (in the murder sense)/waste (in the murder sense)
The French word for lampshade is basically "day killer" but it's used in the same way a noir writer like Chandler might describe a gangster being wasted by a gat. French noir often uses the verb "abattre" to describe someone being killed by a gun.

>>20269276
That would be a nice story but unfortunately abattre has much more mundane meanings. Etymologically it just means "to lower" and is used in a profusion of meanings. "Abattre ses cartes" means "to show one cards". An "abattement" is a tax allowance or a depression. A "rabat" is a flap. in Bordeaux an "abat d'eau" manes simply rain. And there's many more.

>>20269050
Aujourd'hui is the day of today (hoc dies), by opposition to the day of Yesterday or the day of Tomorrow. Surely you say yesternight instead of yesterday evening?

>>20269143
>not wanting Brie to tongue your asshole

>>20269050
You have to accept that french often is a retarded language and just memorize some things or you're never gonna make it.
>quatre-vingt-dix-sept

>>20269050
>hui
sounds like oui (yes). you see their problem?
>Quoi est ca?
sounds like ass. French people have taste and it doesn't take longer to pronounce keskece than whatizdat.

>>20269587
>Not using the patrician Qu’est-ce

>>20269050
>>Qu'est-ce que c'est que ça ?
The "que" between "c'est" and "ça" is misplaced

>>20269050
what's up with her tongue

>English
>96
>Ninety-six
>French
>96
>four times twenty ten and six.
Les gars...

>>20269718
Mon frères...
Wait how do you say 'we got too cocky' in French?

>>20269536
Brie tongues my asshole

>>20269645
>t. never read a novel in French

>>20269718
>Les gars
>pas Mon gars
Salopard

>>20269802
>Mon gars
>pas Mes gars
sale pédé

>>20269805
>>20269802
Answer my question >>20269731 frenchoids.

>>20269814
on est devenu trop bitulaires

>>20269890
Merci beaucoup mec

>>20269718
The weirdest part is that that isn't even olde French. They used to just say nonante six like normal human beings

>>20269564
>>20269718
>nonante-sept
>mfw belgian

who is Paris? and why is a city? why is relate with Troy?

french is not translated english
hui is hui, not today
qu'est-ce que is qu'est-ce que, not "what is it"

>>20271349

>>20269901
outrecuidant for the real translation of cocky


for the best dictionary
https://www.cnrtl.fr/definition/cuider

>>20271349
From wikipedia:
>The name Paris is probably of Luwian origin, and comparable to Pari-zitis, attested as a Hittite scribe's name. The name Paris is etymologically unrelated to the name of the French city of Paris, which derives its name from a Gaulish tribe called the Parisii.

>>20269050
They call potatoes earth apples

>>20269365
>yesternight instead of yesterday evening?
I wish

>>20269108
Capote et saute ne riment pas. C'est bien de la merde ton truc.

>>20269097
>De quessé?

>>20269050
Am I supposed to find that picture appealing? Why would I want that instead of a cute 2D girl?

>>20269731
Nous furent consommés par notre propre hubris.

>France : frein à main
>Québec : brake à bras
Pourquoi est-ce qu'il faut toujours que les français soient des aussi grosses tapettes?

>>20269050
>>Qu'est-ce que c'est que ça ?
nobody says this IRL

familiar speech
>c'est quoi ?
>this is what?

normal speech
>qu'est-ce que c'est ?
>what is it (?) that this is?


>>Aujourd'hui
you can often hear "au jour d'aujourd'hui" which would mean literally "to the day of the day of today" which probably appeared the same way "aujourd'hui" appeared, with the sense of "as of now"

>>20269097
>>20271819
>de ?

>>20269050
>>To the day of hui
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=go%20to%20hui

brianne is not french

>>20271886
>you can often hear "au jour d'aujourd'hui"
Which is nonesense and all that is most strictly contrary to the "bien parlé" of French

who the fuck comes up with this shit

german is by far the best language to express your thoughts
>t. german

>>20272797
It gives a definition of faggot, and it goes around You (formal)

Maybe there just stupid?

>>20272814
what?

>>20272797
"The German language is confusing, difficult to use, does not sound pleasant, and is not rich in metaphors"

>>20272797
This is true. The language is sadly wasted on the Germans, however, since they don't have any thoughts.

>>20269097
C'est qu'c'est ça?

>>20272814
>ESL Gonzales trying to lecture ESL Arminius
>>20274355
>implying
German is no less aesthetic than English and French. These three are the only languages any sufficiently elitist person would actually seek to speak (let us not confusing knowing Greek or Latin or Hebrew with speaking these languages), and they only differ mildly in the grand scheme of language. Obsessing over these minute differences is an exclusively plebeian mindset of barely educated people who do not in fact speak all three and can thus objectively judge their differences.

>>20274654
confuse*

>inb4 anglo trannies seething

>>20271850
Basé en criss.

>>20272771
>he doesn't ask for caco calo at restaurants
j'veux un caco calo et pas autt chose

>>20269050
Holy fuck, Frenchs are fucking retards. Just say hui, just say Qu'est-ce?

>pic related is right

>>20277139
But then they have one thing less to laugh at anglos seething about.

best book to learn french ?

>doing French on Duolingo
>learn a bunch of cool French words such as t-shirt, match, foot, and weekend

Is this why they're so autistic about loan words in their language?

>>20269050
>aufgehoben
>>picked up
>>put down
>>canceled out
>>preserved
>>>Hegel evidently thought these various meanings were obvious, and elected not to comment on them.

>>20278579
They also use "parking" kek fucking retards. Italians are also retarded and they use "computer"

je mappelle Mike
Je suis American
je aller a l'ordinateur