/lit/ - Literature

>>20243145
well, was it?

>>20243149
I don't think it was. They basically complained that my story showed sex workers in a bad light.

I wrote an action story where the 2 leads were a snarky, serious badass action girl and a guy who could fight but had horrible anxiety around chicks. I still got told it was sexist and potentially upsetting to female readers.

>>20243145
>>20243162

>>20243145
If it’s written by a cis male, it’s unironically sexist. Period.

>>20243145
if it doesn't get called sexist is it even good?

A Room without Sexism
By Anon

Imagine a room without sexism. It has a table, but no legs to slide between. It has a lamp, but no switch to jiggle or chain to pull. It has a window, through which no sky-raping mountains, nor river-molested valleys are visible. You cannot come inside.

Fin.

>>20243296
heh heh heh nice one bro, women owned

>>20243332
i liked it, dilate

>>20243332
Who said anything bad about women?

>>20243145
Ok? Then stop being misogynistic in your writing? Yikes dude, at least you were corrected early on. You just have to be more careful.

>>20243149
>>20243249
>>20243252
Here's the email my professor just sent me:

Anon,

Due to the content of your story--and the approach you took to handling and discussing the content--I'm going to have to pull it from workshop for today. I can give you personal feedback on your story if you want, but I have to say that I think you took the wrong approach to it. Not only is it overtly misogynistic, but your approach to the Ukraine War and its refugees is baffling, patently untrue, and offensive. This is not to say that there aren't refugees using dating apps as you claim, but you felt no need to complicate or understand their narrative.

I know you are a fan of both enlightenment thinkers and Bret Easton Ellis, but you seem to be getting the wrong messages from either of these sources. Neither of the brothers in your story adopt any sense of Apollo-like discernment toward the world--not to mention the fact that most of the enlightenment's thinkers have definitely been scrutinized in the past two hundred years for their attitudes toward whom they considered to be fully "human"--and, likewise, Ellis's satire is not simply incendiary for the sake of being incendiary. If anything, most of his work satirizes the very characters you vindicate in your story. Patrick Bateman is not a hero; he does not symbolize an ideal. He symbolizes the greed, corruptibility, misogynism, and narcissism of Wall Street during that time period. Again, I think the wrong lessons have been learned and then applied to your story.

I'll still give you full credit for the story--I won't argue that clearly effort has been put into writing this--and, again, I can give thorough personal feedback if that's what you want, but if you want a story to be workshopped by your peers, I suggest you go back to the drawing board and either figure out how to make a more palatable and nuanced version of this story, or start fresh. I highly suggest you not aim for vileness for the sake of vileness. When it comes to satire and the incendiary heed this general rule of thumb: aim high, not low. In other words, are women refugees really an appropriate target to deride?

I hope this doesn't deter you from continuing to write but will help you move in the right direction toward what is both appropriate and productive. Let me know if you have any questions.

>>20243389
based teacher telling you to punch up instead of shitting on defenceless penniless families fleeing from war because you hate women

>>20243389
Hahahaha serves you right for thinking academia would do anything other than try to brainwash you.

>>20243406
I'm not even an English major, I just wanted an easy A.

>>20243389
Patrick Batman is the bad guy? Chudbros I dont feel so good...

>>20243389
>This is not to say that there aren't refugees using dating apps as you claim, but you felt no need to complicate or understand their narrative.

serves you right chud

>>20243389
post the actual story ffs, dont be a fag

>>20243429
I'll post it in a bit. Right now I need to email back, contact a few administrators ahead of time, and ensure this whole situation doesn't spiral out of control.

>>20243389
Based professor

>>20243389
seems like a pretty good professor honestly desu

>>20243415
Patrick Bateman believes he’s is the bad guy because he has an awareness of the soulless social sphere he lives in, leading him to act on it. In the end he realizes his friends are just as psychopathic without realizing it, showing that Bateman has more of a conscience than other ironically. Brainlet professor

>>20243389
this is genuinely good advice and you should take it

>>20243389
The email was the story all along.

>>20243399
>punch up
Kys.

>>20243389
Cringe, shartkrainians deserve ridicule

>>20243473
>is that [word that imagined enemy uses] aaaaaah I'm going insane!!

>>20243389
You sound like a faggot who idolizes Jordan Belfort, Patrick Bateman and rewatches Fight Club repeatedly

>>20243389
Lmao, so this is that Dante thread again but in reverse. Funny.

>>20243389
The sheer niggerness of modern education.

>>20243490
It's a cringe phrase for multiple reasons. Not only are you redditors fags, you're deluded beyond belief.

seethe chud

>>20243553
>it's cringe, it's reddit, it's anything it has to be that will absolve me from having to think

>>20243399
Cringe, kys tranny

>>20243560
NTA
you're an absolute faggot

>>20243399
So far as I can tell, the target of this kind of thing is not the selected victim group so much as their hypocritical, moralizing, self-appointed defenders. In particular, it takes aim at the way in which the most ruthless, powerful people on earth have managed to make the cultural affectations of the left into their own tool.
It is possible to sympathize with the plight of Ukrainian women refugees, and oppose the invasion of Ukraine, but still find this funny, and the storytelling creative.

>>20243570
You're a moron who turns his brain off whenever he sees his preprogrammed scary word, you don't belong on a board ostensibly about the pursuit of knowledge, puffed-up pseud moron

Here's the story for anyone curious. I acknowledge it is not very good. I wrote it all in one day, and had to incorporate certain things such as the power going out, cat toy, etc.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jzPj-uRG_gNtJoj08xNX75aI3fuXcK7biD18MGDiPhU/edit?usp=sharing

>>20243399
no such thing as punching up, down, left, right
there is only punching someone

>>20243583
ironic, since people use the standin phrase "punch up" instead of thinking seriously about joking at others' expense

>>20243601
>ironic
No it isn't

>>20243389
Here's my reply:

With all due respect, Professor, there are some things I must point out. First of all, if there was a problem with my story, you should have told me about it prior to publishing it on Canvas for my peers to read. I submitted my work to you on the 13th of Wednesday and my module for review wasn't made available until 17th. This means there were four whole days for you to reach out to me and express any concerns. Instead of this being made a private matter between you and me, this now involves other students. As a result, I'm not entirely sure I feel comfortable coming to class if I'm going to be treated like a leper. If there are assignments posted on Canvas, then I still plan to complete them for the sake of my grade.

Second, you yourself have assigned us misogynistic material in the past, such as Nilda by Junot Diaz, an author who has faced various accusations of sexual assault. I don't quite see why what I have written is anything different than what you have given us, which in my view is far more offensive than anything I have ever written. If you wish to scrutinize me over ethics, then please set a better example as to what is acceptable in the writing world.

Third, I must emphasize that the characters in my writing are fictitious individuals who do necessarily represent my own views or beliefs. This is certainly one of those instances. In my two years here at REDACTED, I have made sure to treat all my peers with respect, regardless of what characteristics they might possess.

Fourth, my story is not "vile for the sake of vileness". The language used by my characters is designed to reflect the attitudes many young men (not including myself) hold towards certain groups of people. If anyone was to write a story about the Antebellum South, then it would be a strong misrepresentation of that era to have characters speak in a politically correct tone, especially in regard to African Americans.

Fifth, please do not assume I take after or am necessarily a fan of certain past writers. Although I am a fan of Ellis and use Kantian philosophy of freedom in the story, I have never claimed to be a fan of the latter or any other "Enlightenment Thinkers" who have been scrutinized for their personal beliefs. This seems like a strawman to liken me to writers whose views wouldn't be accepted in the 21st Century Liberal West.

Sixth, I understand some of the themes in my story might not have been made very transparent, such as the Apollo - Dionysius Dichotomy. This is a result of me not building upon certain literary elements, which I would've explained in class.

If there's anything more to say, please contact me personally.

>>20243605
eh it's close enough for me

>>20243560
Your latest in fashion twitter phrase isn't proof of your independent thought. Quite the opposite.

>>20243570
>>20243583
mind numbing retardation. you shit out npc platitudes and then say this?

>>20243611
>being overly defensive over some random assignment
Yikes. No wonder you're still single.

>>20243611
anon just write whatever drivel you think they’ll find acceptable, get your degree, and move on
don’t waste time arguing with these people

>>20243588
You have to allow access.

>>20243615
Some words just describe concepts, anything about twitter is manufactured solely in your mentally ill little mind, you deranged retard

>>20243624
Of course I'm being defensive, I'm being accused of shit which could land me in trouble if someone makes a big stink out of all this.
>>20243629
Sorry Anon, it should work now.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/15KTm7KL30QIxf5sZYvZsUTeFEaIQb06Dww0Tk8cY8Zk/edit?usp=sharing

>he thought academia was a place where humans can exist
idiotic.
just take the easy way out and write works which criticize principles from the Age of Enlightenment only because they contradict other principles from the Age of Enlightenment (which your works ostensibly portray as the “true” or “superior” principles), and never for any other reason. Criticize reason for being in opposition to things like tolerance or individualism or humanism. Criticize liberty or equality for sometimes being in opposition to the other. Academics eat that shit up, they’re predictable and retarded and they want to believe in the subset of principles from the Age of Enlightenment which makes them happy but they don’t want to be associated with the principles that contradict those or with the Enlightenment itself. Academia is not a place for independent thought, you are there to get a certificate and then to leave it forever.

>>20243611
Christ anon. As much as you're right that your professor is a fag, you're a much larger fag to choose this hill to die on. You should've literally just written some brain dead normie NPC woke garbage and moved on.

>>20243611
I hope you didn't send this yet, it comes across as both overly defensive and accusational towards your prof. Most of the focus should be on how you're writing characters that capture a current sentiment that is not your own, and that this point just have been missed. Don't forget that this institution can screw you over it you give them the slightest reason; don't give them any more.

>dumb frog poster is dumb all around
pottery

>>20243645
too many swear words

>>20243389
>>20243611
Just post the story already.

>>20243645
Kek at all the hamplanets seething about a story about dating a hot Ukrainian. You know the professor was fine with it and a ham planet dyke-oid army assaulted him and his npc brain couldn’t resist a riled up mob.

>>20243588
i can't request access :(

>>20243645
Damn, this is bad. You keep slipping into present tense and the characters talk with all the fluidity and normality of robots.

>>20243645
>“But that will change tonight!” I thought to myself in the cafe.
To whom else could he think to?

>>20243669
His imaginary friend

>>20243389
>In other words, are women refugees really an appropriate target to deride?
Yes

>>20243666
That's actually what I think happened. It was up for an entire day for peer review. The first two guys who reviewed it had no problem with it, but then a third person reviewed it and started railing about how railing on sex workers was misogynisitc. After a few minutes, I saw that it was deleted, then I received the email.
>>20243664
I usually don't write vulgar language in my work. I was in a rush and when I read it back I noticed it was awful.
>>20243668
I tried editing out all use of present tense, but I guess I missed some words. Dialogue is indeed a bit robotic.

Good story. The Apollonian-Dionysian theme is clear as day if that was your assignment. Your professor needs a way to grade this without the hamplanet army banning you from proverbial twitter. Try to avoid conflict and emotional confrontation with the professor

>“Well, what happened?”

>I told him about how when I was about to tell her to leave the thunder took out the power, and how she had probably stolen from me.

>“At least you didn’t catch something from her.”

>“I did kiss her throughout the night.”

>“And every man she’s ever been with.”

>I gagged. “Please don’t remind me.”


>Lukas began to laugh. “Oh well, I’ll be back in Germany within two weeks. Maybe the cops will catch that bitch by then. Want to go drinking?”

>“No,” I responded. “I need to learn to live in reality. I don’t want to be loose anymore.”

>“Oh please, you’ll change your mood when I get there. We’re Deutsch, we like to party! I’ll tell you all about the crazy things I did. You know how we Germans like to make a mess of ourselves over there. ”
>And now here I sit again at the Kranzler, eagerly awaiting the company of my brother back from his Odyssey. Though we may tease and ridicule each other for all sorts of things, it was brotherly kinship where I found true love and freedom.

Post story

>>20243611
Do not send this. Your story is absolute garbage tier and does not deserve any defense. Take the grade and run. You're lucky your retarded prof would ever give this piece of shit full marks.

>>20243687
I didn't know how to conclude it. I needed a way to incorporate the "lightening taking out the power" prompt given to me.

>>20243645
It's not bad but the dialogue feels stiff. I really like the last couple lines though.
I can definitely see why bluehairs would seethe so violently. I would havejust written something banal to get the grade.

>>20243645
the premise is based and i'm not one of the chudposter trannies but this is hot garbage

>>20243706
Exactly. I'm not seething at the ideas, the execution is the dumpster fire and OP just needs to shut up and take the grade. His prof seems way too nice.

painfully mediocre. you have some good ideas but your prose is bland.
It is just a school assignment though..

>>20243645
This is just a story about a hedonist who sees himself reflected in a whore he's about to fuck and realises the error of his ways. It's a story about casual sex. The topical Ukranian is purely window dressing and serves no purpose. You're not portraying "the kinds of people who misjudge refugees as thieves", you're fabricating that into a reality when it adds nothing to the core thesis, so it's no wonder your teacher wasn't fooled. It doesn't even make sense that she'd manage to steal things while fucking nude. Where did she store the laptop? In her ass? Furthermore, the moral falls flat because the main character reacts with vile at finding out his partner is a whore immediately, even before realising the truth about Kant's freedom in himself. The story would make more sense if his hedonism impulses and dry spell had pushed him to be willing to have sex with an open whore, until something about the night made him understand what he read about Kant differently and come to a realisation. This story could well happen in America without political elements. I also think it's quite hypocritical (of the author, not the characters) to portray prostitution in such a bad light but never reflect on how casual sex is one of the greatest evils of society to begin with. The main character was a whore himself from the beginning, and by the end he goes drinking again, a slave to his impulses that he tries covering up with a cope about comradery that was barely developed.

>>20243611
based but you should still dropout.

>>20243713
His prof is a huge faggot who is more worried about the optics than the quality of what anon actually wrote you dumb nigger.

>>20243743
Quite the opposite. She wants to give full grade to a really piece of shit story.

>into the mind of a forever single cringe autist - the thread
Holy shit OP, please post your story

>>20243745
>" but if you want a story to be workshopped by your peers, I suggest you go back to the drawing board and either figure out how to make a more palatable and nuanced version of this story, or start fresh"

>>20243737
Like I said, I wrote this in a day, but thanks for the feedback.
>>20243741
I'm majoring in Economics, this was just a class I thought I could have some fun with on the side.

>>20243737
Pretty much it.

>>20243389
>I know you are a fan of both enlightenment thinkers and Bret Easton Ellis
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

>>20243761
Definitely stay with economics. You're not made out to be a writer. Maybe a decade of practice might fix it but you don't seem to have innate talent. Did you start reading really late?

>>20243611
>Third, I must emphasize that the characters in my writing are fictitious individuals who do necessarily represent my own views or beliefs
Lmao at that Freudian slip.

>>20243411
Wtf are you studying? CS?

>>20243737
>Furthermore, the moral falls flat because the main character reacts with vile at finding out his partner is a whore immediately, even before realising the truth about Kant's freedom in himself.
Not true at all. The instinctive reaction later being made into a logical premise is a totally natural process. Furthermore seethe more triple vaxxed Shartkrainian

>>20243588
Post it on pastebin retard. Or can another anon post it on pastebin

>>20243779
lol at this russian bot on Zopium

>>20243768
I started reading around the time I was 16, but only got serious about it when I was 18 (I'm 20 now). I realize this story is dogshit but as of late I've been mass producing writing assignments to study for my econ midterms.

>>20243771
OP fucked up.

>>20243611
>anon gets full credit
>bitches out professor for no gain because his fee fees are hurt
Holy shit you’re a pain in the ass
Can you not see this person is trying to kindly tell you you’re showing your power level way too blatantly and you’re at the risk of running into trouble due to your peers?

>>20243643
Virtue signaling isn't punching. Continue to cope. Shouldn't you be seething about the Christian cucks on the plane right about now?

>>20243791
>I started reading around the time I was 16
damn everybody shitting on my man when he's only been literate for 4 years, major props to OP for writing at all....

>>20243799
I just don't want to get reported to student affairs. I wrote the email to try and explain myself.

>>20243804
Not shaming to late bloomer anons!!

>>20243801
>Virtue signaling
You don't know what that means, which is not surprising given your demonstrated habit of hearing scary word combinations and refusing to consider them further

>>20243809
Your email has you trying to flip it on your professor anon. You got your panties in a bunch because they didn’t proof read you before your peers did. The prof sounds like they want to let it die quietly, you need to calm down and try again if you haven’t sent it yet so you don’t make any more enemies.

>>20243645
Kek, why be offended and ask to take it down when you can just laugh at how bad and cringe it is?

>>20243809
Don’t bother arguing

>>20243817
You keep acting like your meme quip is some profound statement. Most likely you're just baiting though.

>>20243799
>>20243809
>>20243826
I don't get why people are bemoaning OP's response. The professor probably isn't super woke (if not he wouldn't have posted it to the other students) he's just trying to cover his own ass to crazy students who will get him in trouble. The only way you win here is by trying to implicate the professor too. It doesn't have to make sense

>>20243878
I also thought the email was pretty well argued

>>20243645
Terrible plot pacing, terrible characters, terrible prose. The only good part was the autistic onslaught on ukranian refugees, made me chuckle a couple of times. Stop copying BEE and stop hamfisting Kant into your stories and you could write something decent.
Anyways, you should be writing stories about heroic ukranian woman fighting voldemort (Put*n) if you simply want to pass the class. Don't defend the artistic merit of your story because it's bad but instead write and empty half apology and defend your right to creative freedom.

>>20243813
if you're the same anon then you should kill yourself for being such a nuanced fag

>>20243809
Wait...you actually sent that email? Holy fuck you are retarded.