/lit/ - Literature

>>20155025
Dude it’s cliched and people will call me a schizo Christ cuck, but the Bible speaks of this thing you’re talking about very clearly in 1 John and the psalms. The problem is that it says we are already absorbed by self love and have to die to ourselves to truly be free. We are not designed to be selfish so when we are we are not running correctly, but we are designed to be focused on God. It’s kind of like how when you hear a good song you look up the artist and read about them. That’s what was suppose to happen with humanity, we were suppose to see creation and become obsessed with God, but because we sin we become obsessed with ourselves. So I say all that to say read 1 John and then Mathew Henry’s commentary on 1 John. God be with you in Christ.

>"Man has no individual "I". But there are, instead, hundreds and thousands of separate small "I"s, very often entirely unknown to one another, never coming into contact, or, on the contrary, hostile to each other, mutually exclusive and incompatible. Each minute, each moment, man is saying or thinking, "I". And each time his I is different. Just now it was a thought, now it is a desire, now a sensation, now another thought, and so on, endlessly. Man is a plurality. Man's name is legion"

- Gurdjieff

>>20155025
Why do you fear yourself anon kun? Is there something about you you do not like?

my diary contains a series in which i battle with myself as narcissist with the name "the great deceiver"

>>20155601
Absolutely based. Keep fighting it day in and day out.

>>20155025
Notes from the underground.

>>20155557
why wouldn't you be when it takes so little to go completely off the rails

>>20156897
It is scary to think that back in university I thought I was pretty much okay but objectively I was batshit crazy, twisted by porn, drugs and an irresponsible, immature outlook.
It feels like isolation and deep reflection is fundamental to living as a tolerable person - especially if you have any past issues or traumas to deal with. That said I think it's almost impossible to be a wholly complete person as we were in Eden, everyone is walking around in their own specific arrangement of brokenness.

>>20155025
Sam Vaknin, you can read his books but I think his videos connect more to what you're looking for, specifically narcissism and the self and how it connects to society.

>>20155025
I dunno I can't help you. In fact I've made peace with my narcissism.

One thing that impresses me is how some people can smoke weed and seem to be totally clueless of their own behaviour. When I used to get high I became ultra-aware of myself to the point where I think it would take actual spiritual training to handle it. I'm surprised so many seemingly low-IQ people are able to smoke with ease for years and even seem to benefit from it. Perhaps they can relax into themselves more easily and are less uptight about it. There's probably a lot of value in that - just giving into your nature entirely.

>>20158595
I hate my nature and use copious amounts of extremely processed food to cope. Yes, I am well over 300lbs and am going to die of heart disease within the not so distant future. I dont care. My family is gone and I have no friends. I'm just waiting for it to end because im too pussy to do it myself. Oh well, back to more Genshin Impact and trying to learn French.

>>20158609
If you control your eating you will one day be able to fluently order a fantastic French meal in a fine dining restaurant. Something worth living for.

>>20158614
Dude have you been to France? I have. The France i could live for died when Vichy was born.

>>20158595
You are neurotic. Some people are born like that, with hyper and meta self-awareness, other are thrown from the living-the-moment continuum and got to life with the scars of seeing what they were not built to. Gotta live with that, remembering the view out of the dome.

>>20158640
The sad part is that it delivers a hell of a lot of fear and confusion but rarely any insight.