/lit/ - Literature

>>19759912
>I think they are cool.
same, they are unique

>>19759912
Who cares. Shill thread.

if any anons are for some reason interested in wasting their time reading gardener's dogshit, at least don't also waste your money - it's available for free here:
https://au1lib.org/book/11994656/1ff726
https://pastebin.com/be7ALyVf

comfy thread

yes but... does he do the drawings?
anyone got a print copy that says "cover by..."?

>8 posts
>4 IPs

It’s a unique style. I think he was going for a metal album style cover thing. Except as if they’re drawn by kids. Since the books are about kids in really fucked up dark situations.
I was taking about this one before in another thread. Pic is about a baby who’s trying to escape a leprechaun thing that’s trying to burn him alive. The book is from the baby’s perspective and the kid clearly doesn’t fully understand what’s going on other than he’s in danger.

>>19760033
Thats a good ratio for a gardener thread, the samefagging is usually way worse

>>19760033
It now says 10 replies and 7 posters dude.

>>19759925
I like the Jigoku one. That’s my favorite Gardner book since it’s basically Pokemon

Holy shit the descriptions for some of these books are fucking insane

Are the CotC posts bots? paid shills? The one true F. Gardner himself?

>>19760033
Your preferred baseline for IP/post ratio is 1.0, where everyone writes exactly one message and leaves, and there is no back and forth or any kind of conversation whatsoever.

That is not how threads work here. Maybe where you came from they do.

>>19759912
he hires a professional artist

>>19759925
>>19759914
Not gonna read your shit Mr. Gardner, but I gotta admit these covers are pvre sovl

The covers convey the moods of the books well. Since they involve the protagonist(s) in ending up in hellish labyrinth and getting stalked by a whoever the antagonist is. Then there’s the Goosebumps esque twist at the end.

>>19760000
Checked

>>19760116
Gardner mentions he does the covers himself in this one.

>>19761014
>Gardner mentions he does the covers himself in this one
Thanks anon.

How much are COTC first editions going for these days?

>>19760959
> there is no back and forth or any kind of conversation whatsoever.
This; it’s always creepy coming here and seeing a bunch of people say the same phrases to nobody…

Anyways fuck you and your daddy’s money Gardner, you can’t write

>>19762054
the good news: no matter how many fake 5-star reviews he writes...
you can tell from the Amazon ranking, on all the goddamn the books, that no one is buying them.
when Gardner reads this, (he created this thread, so he will) i hope he gets the idea to take his dad's money, purchase those shit books in bulk, just to push the ranking up.

>>19761953
First editions?

Which of his books is the best?

>>19762054
>>19762391
This. Nobody is buying your shilling. And you know it because nobody is buying your book. Do you ever get sad knowing that it's just you posting these threads, posting it off-topic in other threads, responding to yourself time and time again?

I love Gardners books! In fact, I hope he releases a new one soon, he really puts a lot of effort into my books and I think they deserve more recognition. Such splendid literature!

>>19761014
Damn I’ll have to read that one.

>>19759914
>>19759925
This is like a SOUL overload. Are these chalk?

>>19759912
The covers are indeed cool. I love he just slapped his photo on the cover of Call of F. Gardner. The man just went for it.

>>19763593
Yea I love it.

i see you guys always mentioning his father
is his father famous or rich?

>>19762940
Might be crayon

I love F. Gardner! His book, changed my life.

>>19765045
He’s certainly changed this whole board.

>>19759914
I like them quite a bit.

>>19762793
kek

>>19759912
I think these are the best covers you'll find on a book. You can really tell what the author is conveying through them. Hey, what better way to know that the actually cares about his work than by him actually drawing his books covers HIMSELF. It's really something.

I can almost swear I have seen every post in this thread before

>>19762940
I think charcoal

>>19759912
Unironically very good covers

>>19759912
Not many people can resist the Call...of...the...Crocodile.

>>19759914
i cant tell if they're good or not

>>19766144
they're good because they look bad. a paid artist with skills would have made them bad by making them look good.

>>19766411
That’s a really good point. Gardner’s apparent desire to make them childish surprisingly made them good. Why does this guy’s whole life seem to be like this? He accidentally memed himself into being an author because of being retarded.

>>19766471

>>19766503
Lost

>>19766503
excellent

Crap cover looks like it's made from a 3 yo kid, looks this a cover.

>>19767350
This a cover

>>19767355
highschool tier

I am related to F. Gardner

>>19763924
His dad is a lawyer/elected official.
When Gardner first started shilling he was soft-doxxed and people found out he is a film school dropout who tried to “run” for a small office in town. There was a local new story run where they went to Gardners house under pretense of doing a political interview but then just blatantly called him out on live TV for having his daddy get him a job at taxpayers expense. It was supposedly so embarrassing his lawyer daddy sued to have the footage destroyed and the only articles on it show these artists renditions of fat boy frank and talk about how he almost cried.
Clearly Frank is still getting shitloads of money from daddy since he’s bought a bunch of fiverr shills. I feel like he’s basically Chris Chan with a rich dad

I always get him confused with the curly haired guy

>>19767536
Don’t worry anon, the real ones still remember

>>19766411
>>19766471
That’s also why Call of the Crocodile is a good book. Because of the manner it’s written. It comes down to emulating a style versus being the genuine deal.

F Gardner’s poor drawing ability makes the covers amazing. Because a talented writer would have to try hard to replicate it. But because of his limited ability they look like they’re drawn by children. Which is what makes them good. Same thing with his writing. There’s unneeded commas all over the place. But it’s otherwise entertaining because of the creepy tone and jarring twist and just overall insanity of the whole narrative.

>>19766503
Based

>>19766503
I hate how accurate this is.

>>19759925
Not fond of the croc logo on the newer ones, as iconic as it may be

>>19770294
I dunno. I kinda like how this board has memed him into using it as his logo DESU.

Having read The Call of F Gardner, I felt like I got my money's worth after the first twenty pages, and the humor became incredibly stale and repetitive. Its like six levels below Mid-Series Family Guy in terms of quality. Like back when Seth MacFarlane had obviously lost all interest in the series and he was just throwing random shit at the walls to pad the timeline and not caring if it stuck or not. Of course it was excusable for Seth MacFarlane to do that, because he had significant monetary incentives and a loyal fanbase, and besides he did occasionally strike gold. Its weird and pathetic for F Gardner to do it because he has neither of those things and he strikes out more often than not.

>>19771115
>the humor became incredibly stale and repetitive

lmao. Gardner's books are not meant to be humorous.

>>19771156
Yeah this. Even though I liked Croc (mostly for the twist) it takes itself dead fucking serious and is one of the most pretentious things I’ve ever read. So the humor is due to autism on Gardner’s part. Unintentional. But I don’t remember any part of Croc being funny other than that breakfast chapter.

>>19770898
>DESU
peak fiverr shill

>>19771231
Newfriend detected. Tbh happens when “to be honest” is abbreviated.

>>19771156
>>19771176
Even if they aren't meant to be funny, that is literally the only value you can take from them. I've only read Call of F Gardner but it was 10% "haha wow what the fuck is this guy smoking?" and 2% "wow that's creepy as fuck" and the rest is just dull bloat.

>>19771566
>bragging about reading 10% of a short novella

>>19766503
LOL!

>>19771176
>it takes itself dead fucking serious

But that’s what makes it funny.

>>19760116
I havent read that one but i did read Call of the Kappa. The reveal of what the Kappa really is was great.

>>19771495
lol jfc, you are desu a fucking moron