/lit/ - Literature

first for zyzz

Second for Rich Piano

>>19742228
We're all gonna make it brah

>>19742217
I want that.

PERMBAN ME TRANNY JANNIES

what is on my mind is the poetry of Omar Khayyam as translated into swedish in the early 1900s. My whole chest is on fire from reading 9 quadrains. I think maybe I finally understand a fair amount of sufi-language. Who knows, really, but whatever it is I think I am reading is awe-inspiring in all its truly debased humanity

Why is female virginity so much more stigmatized than male virginity? I feel like my inexperienced female friends are more ashamed and quiet about it. Why?

>>19742273
>it took about 3 decades for this age old norm to flip 100%

I wish rupi kaur would dominate me with her sexy brown feet

I don't know where reality is located anymore. I don't know who I am. I am the atomized, postmodern individual of the 21st century. Sometimes I think I'm naive in doing what I am doing, like I would need to act more stereotypically mature, engage in a more mature culture, just like society told me when I was little. But it's wrong, theres no objective right or wrong when it comes to making money in 2022, nobody knows how this earth and the market works. Stucked for ever in the absurd until I die

>>19742273
Literally the exact opposite is the case, women are terrified of being known as whores. Whats wrong with zoomers?

>>19742294
Yes just become a crypto shit coin scammer like everyone is doing.

I've had significant influence on other 4channers and created several concepts which other people have taken up and echoed and are now engrained in the culture of certain boards. I also invented several new memewords that the entire site uses and started 3 generals, 1 of which is still recalled and 2 of which are still ongoing, carried out by other people. I've also targeted and destroyed an individual I didn't like and now other people bully that poster whenever they appear.

feels powerful. I am a propaganda master. Using my powers of influence I could effect any new movement I please.

>>19742313
that's like all of us who have been here 10+ years

>>19742313
>and now other people bully that poster whenever they appear
>laughing girls.jpg
Big whoop

>>19742313
I'm stealing this

whish i had more food desu. I can't sleep and eating can help, but I'm not sure I can cover a snack and breakfast, and I want breakfast. I could eat cereal out of the box I guess

I enjoy posting frogs

>>19742294
>100% demoralized
>thinks in jewish buzz terms
>"postmodern", "stereotypical", "nO oBJectIVe RiGhT or wRonG", "the absurd", "jUsT LiKE SOciEtY toLd Me"
>fully loaded self-defeating vocabulary
reality is culture, your culture, and fuck all that other noise. anytime someone tells you something about "there is no objective x (ethics/reality/etc)" they are 100% either on drugs/depressed/jewish. endlessly taking things apart looking for the "objective" in regards to anything meaningful is completely stupid and misguided, because the very nature of meaning is that of relation to a subject. its the jewish spirit to take things apart. your problem isnt your philosophical anxiety over the definition of words, it's that you need a life.

>>19742406
I look forward to you posting them

>>19742406
Your frog posting is bad for you and sickens the rest of us.
Delete them.

>>19742451
4chan needs frogs like frogs need water

Does anybody else ever feel like their internet usage is being tracked? By a person that is, I know browsers and websites these days track your internet usage.

>>19742495
I often think about how my choices online will be used by the tribunal, but that's probably not quite what you mean

>>19742217
7-8% of all humans who have ever lived are currently living right now. I find it strange that this fact doesn't inform our thinking more--we're a very young species.

>>19742495
I think intelligence services have a file on all regular 4chan users

>>19742217
how long do i have to be abstinent to regrow my virginity

>>19742561
My paranoia started when I started posting on 4chan and 4chan adjacent sites a few years ago. Whenever I do something on the internet that I would be embarrassed about if other people knew, I start wondering if a fed goes over my internet history because of the fact I post on websites like 4chan. I know it’s ridiculous because I’ve never posted anything that would make a fed interested in me.

>>19742217
I am an abuse survivor marrying a survivor and I love her more than life itself. I don’t care what other people think anymore because she’s the only person I feel like I can be myself around in the whole world. Let it crash’s be burn I’ll go down with it.

>>19742585
You're probably just being paranoid, I think the fed categorizes users based on how much of they are of a danger to society or do illegal things. If your talking about race wars and posting pictures of guns or posting pedophilic stuff your probably in a higher level of danger category, but you just post about regular stuff like books they probably don't care what you do.

Mid-20s is crazy. Seeing all my friends hit the wall.... A lot of my male friends are getting fat. Girls I dated or had crushes on in college already showing their age, their faces are less tight, their beauty is fading. Even in the faces of the most beautiful you can see something changing. I caught up with this girl I was obsessed with in college recently and she was carrying so much weight about the thighs. I'm included in this too by the way. I am still in good shape but I'm beginning to lose my hair. I'm sure I look more haggard than I used to too, although it's hard to notice that myself.

All of this might make me sound vain, but I don't really mean it in that way. If anything it has reminded me that we are all human. That the beautiful women I fawned over and put on a pedestal are also human. That we're all ugly, really, and that there are things to love about a person other than their appearance. Still, there is some unavoidable sadness to it all.

>>19742622
feds*

Just realized I can't write anything good because I have nothing to say. Should I stop and try again when I get older?

Do people actually meet people on chans? A friend or two to talk about books with, in person maybe, might be nice but I don't go outside.

I have a links for Discord servers made by e-girl literature types but I'm nervous to join.

>>19742630
You should keep writing because the exercise is vital, even if what you write isn't fit to be published. But also live your life and gain important life experiences and then see what you come up with.

>>19742632
Boards have meetups, I think recently there was a lit meetup in NYC and 3 people showed up. I think they became friends if I'm not mistaken.

>>19742313
based. this should become the /lit/ version of the navy seal copypasta

>>19742313
hello yes based department? yeah we got a live one here, get here stat

>>19742489
Nonsense

>>19742568
In males, when everyone who knows you had sex leaves your inner circle
In women, never.

>>19742273
That can't possibly be true. I think it might be a matter of perspective because of how you are experiencing it personally.

>>19742253
extremely based

my asshole hurts

sex changes are the modern faustian bargain

>>19742217
Unleashing hatred and rage produces a feeling of pure catharsis. I'm still unsure what the trade-off is for this feeling. Is it like a drug, where the long term damage is equal or greater than to the ecstasy of the moment? Or does it burn the brush that covers your mind and provides a path to clarity?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nOzR5Jnd6bU

>>19742632
I wouldn’t be surprised if /soc/ led to multiple marriages

>>19742850
in the TFW No GF documentary one of the main guy meets his GF on /r9k/

I wonder if Freud or his ilk had anything to say about teeth. When I was coming out of my depression, I would notice my teeth in a weird way. I was...surprised in a way how straight and clean they are. But why would I be surprised about that? Now that I think about it, many years later, I still notice my teeth in the same way, like, hey, good for me. I think it may be because the teeth are this display from inside the body. They're like a readout of your interior self. Of course it's already a truism that the health of the teeth are a good indicator of overall health. But I wonder if the mind knows that in some way - our self-image - and when we become very self-conscious, perhaps of inner corruption, we begin to find our teeth suspicious. Also, it's not just literally something that inside you, but there's also a noticeable symmetry to them, and the lack thereof is shameful, and straight white teeth are highly prized. I have a cousin who always hides her teeth when she smiles, because her teeth are in bad shape, and I can't help now but associate this body language with her depressive and withdrawn temperament in general. It's quite neat. She hides her mouth when she laughs - showing vulnerability and shame, and of course bowing her head downward. The face in general is a strange object. That is all.

im tryna not drink on weekdays but i went to play some ice hockey so there was really no choice.
also im signing up for some online gambling sites. this is either a great idea or a horrible one
https://youtu.be/smYa7w_7Kwo

The only thing preventing me from killing myself at this point is the hope of writing something good.

I have a problem. I’m addicted to diet soda. I’m worried because the aspartame that’s used to sweeten diet soda might potentially cause cancer. But I just can’t give it up.

>>19742912
The only thing preventing me from killing myself at this point is the fear of something going wrong and ending up disabled.

>>19742906
I quit smoking weed for a year. I have Jan off work so I got some for the New Year. I regret it. How long has it been since you quit?

>>19742916
>addicted to diet coke for two years
>literally have dreams of drinking soda
>wake up angry that i dont have soda
>now i smoke cigarettes instead
im ngmi

>>19742912
The only thing preventing me from killing myself is the gratuitous wonder of the world which will not leave me ungraced

>>19742916
You'll be fine

>>19742284
I'm not joking. I went to the gym since I posted this and worked out as hard as I can so I can attract rupi kaur when I go to a show of hers. I will marry her.

>>19742926
1 month and 27 days

>>19742949
I don't get this fascination with Rupi Kaur. As Punjabi women go, she's not very pretty desu.

>>19742951
How are you feeling? Are you enjoying sobriety? I remember you posting about drinking alot more now, is that still an issue? Are you having vivid dreams?

>>19742963
Are you kidding me? She's a babe and I want my BWC to be punished by her for calling her beautiful before calling her brave or resilient.

>>19742991
this nigga has curry fever

>>19742994
I just like strong, dominant women with brown skin who wear nice clothing and write poetry. I'd eat curry for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, if you know what I mean.

>>19742974
been feeling alright. it was definitely a good choice and i dont get any serious cravings anymore but i do miss it sometimes and will definitely smoke again sometime this year. mainly just tryna get my life in order now. i was drinking a shit ton in december but that was mostly because december has always been a party month for me. ive cut down now and usually keep it to weekends except for last night and tonight.
i have been having more vivid dreams which i am happy about. dreaming is something i really enjoy.

>>19743065
>>19742974
not either of these two anons, but i quit the heavy drinking in november. used to put down two fifths of bourbon a week. one of the incentives has been that i instantly lost weight. im not a big fella but i lost my bitch tits and im not longer bloated. also my skin improved in the week. so the confidence alone is a huge motivator to go on (im quite vain).

however my sister is dying and i know its going to obliterate me, death in the family being the last big thing that sent me into a bender. desu tho plenty of my past addictions seem to fade, and i havent been a big drinker for long anyway. i quit smoking two years ago, and im otherwise quite healthy and eat well

The desire to fuck girls is probably the most universal male experience, but it never happens to me and I feel left out. Don't get me wrong - I'm not asexual. It's just, I became depressed around age 15 and since then my libido is dead as a doornail. Having a sex drive but not having girls to fuck is one thing, but not wanting sex at all? That's just another realm of bizarre.

>>19742313
>. I've also targeted and destroyed an individual I didn't like and now other people bully that poster whenever they appear.
How? Ossian fag and butters are about the only individuals and everyone bullied them since the get go.

>sigma grindset is all about delegating
>i prefer when someone else i live with drives me to work
>my coworkers thing im cringe but they dont know im based

>>19742916
Start titrations yourself down by mixing diet soda with seltzer, and replace it completely bit by bit until you’re just drinking seltzer. It worked really well for a friend of mine.

>>19743092
im sorry to hear about your sister anon

>>19743147
thanks, bud. we're getting ready and god has always been there.

How can i learn to get off on women being hurt? I enjoy seeing women hurt, it’s a pleasure for sure, but it just doesn’t do it for me sexually. Everything would be so much simpler if only i had a sadistic sexuality, rather than wanting women to want me

>>19743123
maybe your T is low bro, get it checked by a doc

>>19743123
were you ever on SSRIs or Adderall?

>>19743172
I would like to cut off your genitals and fuck you to death with an iron rod.

>>19743172
>Everything would be so much simpler if only
If only you stopped developing weird fetishes

A wreath for Florentine
A wreath for Troy
A wreath for mine and Marthas
and Madonnas
And a wreath for minding the store.

Cumcumcumcumcumcumcumcumcum

Cumcum

Cum

>>19743332
Here's some inspiration.

>>19743355
dubs for rupi

>>19743361
Ms. Kaur.

>>19743355
In her format (iambic pootameter):

Cum, cumcum cum,
Cum,
Cumcumcum
Cum, cum
Cumcum,
Cum

>>19743361
Looks like Victoria Beckham in the 90s

her face is too long

>>19743355
>>19743361
>>19743365
I truly don't get it. She's like a 4/10. And I'm Punjabi myself, so if anything I should be biased in her favor.

>exchanged numbers with art store cashier
>she keeps sending my artsyyy songs
>pretend im listening to them
>listening to steely dan again for the 900th night in a row?
based?

>>19743399
Why not send her some Steely Dan?

>>19743399
based and steely dan pilled

>>19743406
if that that bitch is ever gonna hear steely dan, its gonna go with the beat of me plugging her mulatto ass

>>19743386
>>19743397
Please stop disrespecting my waifu.

She is a 9/10 (the missing point is because I don't know what she smells like).

>And I'm Punjabi myself
Poo in loo.

I'll never see her again, and it doesn't matter. I know her thoughts never wonder to me. I own no real estate in her mind. That doesn't matter. Is there a next HER??? Will I ever feel that way again? I hope so, bros. But I feel so old now.

>be scared of intimacy
>push people away
>feel lonely
>have no one to talk to because I pushed them all away
>"wtf how could this happen??"
Many such cases.

>>19743449
Based tummyposter

>>19743471
Sad!

I just rejected a $1,000,000 inheritance offered by my grandfather. Told him to split it and add to the other grandchildren's money. I don't know why I even said it. Something about the whole thing didn't feel right, it felt corrupting on a deeper level for my relationship with him.
Long drive home, just got back. Now I'm second guessing myself.
Am I a fucking idiot? Wtf is wrong with me? I might have said no to a life without financial anxiety.

people who have browsed this site regularly have committed suicide. People not unlike yourself who have browsed this site is dead

>>19743497
Money is corrupting, but it’s his money to split up as he pleases. You can just say, “aw I don’t need anything” but don’t push the matter any.
Now if he ignores that request and you get it anyway, you can give to your siblings if you want. Did you not want them knowing you would forego your portion for them?

Usually the worst corruption comes from not having enough. But I see your dilemma.
Really sick of seeing to suicidal frogs though. Knock that shit off. Please

>>19743497
You moron, I inherited just under 100k and it made a big difference, you messed up bro.

I am increasingly reaching the point where I feel a strong urge to see the world plunge into mass bloodshed. Another world war, or a civil war in a major place like France or China or the United States. Maybe Fukuyama is right, and sheer boredom will be the thing that restarts history. I don't want to stagnate. I don't want the world to chug into a hazy future in a dull stupor. I want drama and passion in teh world again, and I feel increasingly like I want it even if the cost of it is a mountain of skulls.

>>19742217
sobriety is for fags

>>19743601
You need a hobby

i may or may not have contribute to a tranny bitch getting on hrt and growing titties and shrinking (her) balls to the point of no return
im thinking based?

>>19743471
such is life

>>19743497
you did the right thing anon, because then the other grandchildren would have harassed you as well as losing family relation in general instead of doing the morally just action like you did. you cannot buy a clean conscious, you would have second guessed yourself "why didn't i ask him to split it" on the drive home either way

besides, 1 mill isn't actually enough to retire for life on anymore lol, it'll get you a decade or two for sure but it's not a lot in the grand scheme of things. but you maintained your integrity and didn't submit into the temptation of greed and i praise you for it

>>19743654
tell me more

does /tv/ have good philosophical takes?
>>>/tv/162294583

>>19743706
read a book

Does your family ever make you seethe with anger?
I'm normally a chill guy, and can brush off insults if thrown at me by someone else. But any condescending comment I get from my family makes me irrationally angry. It has such an accusatory tone, like everything I do is inherently wrong. Maybe its a me thing, maybe I just need to not care but man, it's tough to let it get out of your head when you're living in the same house.

>>19743696
I think he said his grandfather did split it, it's just he rejected his part of the inheritance. That's silly because his grandfather would be happier knowing that his money improved his grandson's overall well-being, rejecting it is the same as rejecting his wish to improve his well-being. There is nothing morally wrong with accepting inheritance.

>>19743721
ah ok i suppose i misread it then. and while there is nothing wrong with accepting inheritance, there is something to be said about not valuing money given to you compared to money earned. that much money in a such a short of amount of time can and have driven people crazy and made their life worse overall, it is like lottery winners. unless that anon had a certain plan for how he intends to use that money (ideally for good), then it may just have corrupted him into hedonism and degeneracy

>>19743696
Unless you're an idiot a million is life changing money for most people basically ensuring a life of financial comfort. It's not about becoming wealthy and retiring instantly

>>19743497
this is a tough one to answer.

>>19743727
I'd hope anon would do the right thing with the money if he did accept it, like truly dedicating himself to a dream he always had or investing wisely.

>>19743746
Exactly, you invest ot

I have it I have it I have it. THE GESAMTKUNSTWERK. I have it. I HAVE IT. Gotta go fast before someone else makes the gesamtkunstwerk gotta go fatus gogogogogogogogogogogogo sanic x

>>19743752
not anon but id probably just buy a shit ton of cocaine and gamble like a degenerate

>>19743399
She don't remember the Queen of Soul
It's hard times befallen the sole survivors
She thinks I'm crazy, but I'm just growing old.

>>19743172
It's a common thing I've noticed. It makes some sense psychologically when I read other anons describe it. I'm too tired to explain but watch the final fight scene in OUATIH, I love it on a visceral level and think I probably enjoy it out of the same sentiments you do:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-U5K71x5r4&ab_channel=ARTagonia

Go to the 4 minute mark.

I have made bad posts today on purpose. Very bad posts, out of spite and vain conceit. I will atone for this deviant act by making good posts for the forseeable future.

It is sometimes hard to stay the course. I do not ask for mercy or understanding. My burden is mine alone.

>>19743775
The Cuervo gold... ...!
The fine Co-lombian...
Make tonight a wonderful thing,,, (say it again) duh doo
The Cuervo Gold...
The fine Co-lombian...
Make tonight a wonderful thing...
duh do duh do duh doo..
The Cuervo Gold...
The fine Col-ombian
Make tonight a wonderful thing...

>>19742217
Imagine how stuffy wearing those tights all the time must have been.

>>19742217
i have made the carefully considered decision to die

>>19743924
please reconsider

>>19743932
ok i won't

>>19743924
Based and Stoic pilled

>>19743924
Why kill yourself? You will die anyway. Life is so short. All you have to do to die is wait.

>>19743924
what method? askin for fren

>>19743985
Clitoricide

>>19743985
i'm going to self immolate at the national mall at 2:22pm February 22

>>19742846
>Is it like a drug, where the long term damage is equal or greater than to the ecstasy of the moment? Or does it burn the brush that covers your mind and provides a path to clarity?
of the two it's definitely more the former, although I suppose it is good to know what you're actually feeling. I think acting in anger is virtually never or truly never best, cus you can't really tell what you're doing, you can't really guage.

>>19743132
>he doesn't know

>>19743983
Waiting is extremely painful for me

>>19744047
the afterlife is real
hell is real
suicide is an enormous sin, and a transgression that proves your disdain of Gods rule
I don't think it will be forgiven, since it's a proof of lack of faith, which is the only true sin
All God asks of you is perseverance right now. That's it. Things will turn around. All but Him fades. He creates what He wills. Literally anything can happen. Causality is for fags. Hold on.

>>19742196
neither FOB nor ASC, i think she's moved here (uk) a couple years ago to study. status indicators not promising, i've been studying philosophy for a few years, no job. at least i conduct myself well though. we've agreed to go for drinks btw, she was fairly enthusiastic about it. she seems as progressive as they get.

>>19743399
Ask her out, nigger.

>>19743416
After marriage you mean

>playing SWAT 4 out of nostalgia and due to plenty of youtubers making videos remembering how cool the gane was
>tfw keep failing because of killing enemies instead of neutralizing them harmlessly
>tfw this keeps happening

>>19742284
my toes need some attention anon

>>19744048
LOOOL gay >>19744047 don't listen to this faggot

body dysmorphia is grinding me down

>>19744048
Who said this to you? God? How can you say this so confidently? What is the basis of this belief?

>>19744321
It's okay sister. All bodies are beautiful

>>19744321
Use Buddhism to float above the illusion.

>>19742217
Tigger rhymes with rigger (like 3d)

>>19742217
I am so bored, probably going to drink half of 1 liter whiskey bottle during evening

>>19742217
"Joyce knew that his wife was more than the some of her farts, but he was oh so very grateful for them all the same."

"Joyce knew that his wife was more than the some of her farts, but he was ever so grateful for them all the same."

>>19744365
>was about to ask if i should get Finnegans Wake
Were you reading my post joycelad

I have respect for Christian religions in the civilizations where they belong. But being an Orthodox Christian as a Russian person is so fucking cucked it's beyond regular cuckoldry, it's watching your wife get ass raped. How can you adhere to a foreign religion that was introduced extremely late for purely political reasons and couldn't even take proper roots in your own land up until the XVIth century. Then was nearly eradicated by communists, of all people. Until the contemporary government conveniently decided to pick up the discarded toy, revive it and use it again, out of purely practical intent. I love that. This is how our people see "faith in God".

I'm drunk and I fear tomorrow for hangover

>>19742626
Beauty is temporary but being an ugly schizo pays til the end.

Im trying to understand why I unconsciously hate my mom in a way that I do everything opposite no matter what she says. I think that I'm still blaming her for me burning my hand (when I was 11 months old). However I received undivided love and attention when she was caring for me. I still crave for this nurturing that I still remain in such a poor current situation (living with parents at the price of my individuality). I dont know what to do.

>>19744374
Nope

>Daydream about reestablishing contact with the only friend I've had in my life, a classmate from elementary school
>Check social media
>Find his profile
>Look through random photos
>He looks like a completely normal adult living a responsible life
I mean, I don't know what I expected. I guess I somehow anticipated I'd be transported back in time and see the same boy I used to know. Perhaps I still see myself as a child and I projected that onto him. I suppose I also hoped that he grew up to be a loser just like me since we used to be friends... but upon thought, even back then, you could tell he was different from me. He'd protect me from bullies and try to get me out of my shell, while I was overwhelmed with just trying to function. It's no wonder our paths would diverge this much in thirteen years.

Sad. Now I don't even want to contact him anymore, it would feel like a five-year-old boy trying to be friends with a thirty-year-old man, even though we are the same age legally-speaking.

>>19744619
Anon, give him a call. Whatever happens, happens.
Dont regret not doing so years later

>>19744345
>tfw alcohol is banned in my country atm

>>19744627
I'll regret it if I do, too. I have enough embarrassing memories that torment me daily as it is, and this one would surely turn into an intrusive thought as well. Besides, I really don't feel like getting to know him anymore... I think I just wanted to be transported to the past, experience those innocent times again. But that's impossible. Contacting him is only going to lead to disappointment as I will be made all the more aware of this fact.

Thanks for the sentiment, though, Anon.

Is my ban over?

>>19744575
If I were to warrant a guess, perhaps you feel as though your individuality is stifled by her presence, and you try to rebel by doing the opposite of what she tells you. You feel guilty for that as you realize she's not doing it out of malice, but at the same time you lack the confidence, resolve, or what have you, to assert your independence. If this is true, then perhaps it would be best for you to set a goal of trying to be more assertive, even if it causes conflict initially.

I apologize if you didn't want to be psychoanalyzed like that. Take it with a pound of salt as I have no real basis for any of these assumptions. Regardless, I hope you figure it out, Anon.

>>19744674
no. now go

today was the first time I talked to another human being in 2 weeks. it was nice. but now I'm home again laying in bed and thinking "what do you want to do?" and the only thought that comes up is "I want to be alone".

I think ive out grown fantasy, either that or i have read all the great fantasy and my standards are too high. Is the future of reading boring "serious" books and scifi?

>>19744687
It feels like it's a power struggle between complete submission and dominance with my mom. I do feel guilty about not realizing that I cant fulfill what she wishes for me (find my own happiness by knowing what I want and be an ambitious individual). It really seems like a situation where I dont want for others to make me do something but at the same time I have no idea who am I and what I want to do. Am I missing something in this dynamic?

>>19744712
The future of reading is only nonfiction and nothing else. Reading fiction is for little sissies.

>>19744722
>NOOOOOO!!!!!! MY MOM!! WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH MY LIFE??? I HATE MY MOM!!!!
So I am actually sharing this board with teenagers

I'm in RCIA. I will be baptised this Easter if I go through with it, but I keep having doubts about Christianity. They're not really intellectual doubts (although I do have those as well), they're more to do with the practices and attitudes that Christianity expects from its believers. All the kneeling, prostrating, calling yourself "unworthy", repeating prayers and asking God for grace all the time, begging on the floor like an abject slave. I don't know, it just seems rather silly. I just keep having the thought, Why did God create me like this then? Why didn't he create me as equal to him, as a God myself? Why does he deserve to be God and I don't? It's not like I chose to be born as a human being. I deserve to be God as much as God does..

>>19744741
>NOOOOOO!!!!!! MY MOM!! WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH MY LIFE??? I HATE MY MOM!!!!
yes

>>19744582
Is that a no to reading my post or to getting the Wake?

>>19744722
>a power struggle between complete submission and dominance
This sounds familiar, I've experienced something similar. It just seems easier to either rebel completely or submit completely for some reason. But supposedly that's not a good strategy and it's better to gradually assert your independence, small steps at a time. I find it hard to motivate myself to do that for some reason, perhaps you do too. I'm not really sure what to do in that situation. But as far as having no idea what you want to do, that's probably okay? Or at least it's not something that justifies your mom forcing you to live up to her expectations. If you haven't been very independent previously, it's no wonder you wouldn't know what you want or who you are. So you're still supposed to do things on your own in order to figure that out. If you follow your mom's plan for your life you won't really learn anything about yourself anyway. The issue, of course, is that then you have to take responsibility for your choices, which is hard, especially if your mom uses every failing as an excuse to say things like "I told you you should have done X, you didn't listen, see what happens?" and so on. I suppose that's just the price of pursuing individualism. Whether it's worth paying or not, I have no idea.

>>19744772
>If you follow your mom's plan for your life you won't really learn anything about yourself anyway.

Youthful rebellion is classically that, an attempt separate oneself from the internalized of the adult that's been engrafted into one's own head through the functioning of one's mirror neurons, which are designed to recreate simulations of other minds within one's own.

>>19742630
You have no personality because you constantly avoid your true self with internet. You don't even have friends to reflect upon things. You need to isolate yourself from distraction for some time and try to be honest with yourself to find your true self.

>>19744712
What's your top 3?

>If you follow your mom's plan for your life you won't really learn anything about yourself anyway.

Youthful rebellion is classically that, an attempt to separate oneself from the internalized mind of the adult that's been engrafted into one's own head through the functioning of one's mirror neurons, which are designed to recreate simulations of other minds within one's own.

To the anons saying things such as burger punk and whatever.
This is synth burger punk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKP5fqjNGn0&ab_channel=phelto
But I think she is French or Algerian or whatever.

>>19743259
that's nice sweetie

>>19744772
My mom didnt actually set any particular life path for me to take. She just wants for me to know what I want to do, be independent and be happy. Maybe everything is connected to the feelings that I feel disconnected from myself and life in general. I feel like my life is just happening outside of me and I'm not in control of this therefore I'm easily influenced by others decisions when I dont know my own plan. Taking responsibility is extremely hard for me because of massive doubts whenever I try to reach conclusion.

Ahem

I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers I hate niggers

>>19744842
can you elaborate?

>>19744854

>>19744813
Series is probably Malazan, WoT and Black Company. No idea about individual books.

In 1999 I got molested as a kid by a female babysitter, I was around 10 and she was 19 I believe. She got really drunk off my grandpas very aged and probably unsafe whiskey (it was inside these weird bottles shaped like people and you spin their head off as the cap) and started rolling around with me on the ground, which turned into making out and then her massaging my crotch area with her foot. She was sleeping over the day because my mom was gonna take her with us to a water park but she was gone when I woke, and told my mom she was sick, which was probably only half the reason. I never saw her again but her two brothers showed up at my door once asking why I molested their sister. Nothing really happened with that. I always found it strange that she actually told people, and blamed me. I assume either it’s just the hubris of the femoid or maybe when she sobered she realized she couldn’t be fucked if I told anyone, so she started working on a cover story or something. In any case I never told anyone, didn’t even phase me that much since I found myself in sexual situations a lot as a kid for some reason. Ok bye

>>19744942
could be fucked*

>>19744942
Female babysitters do that sort of thing all the time, albeit not that extreme. Massaging elementary school boys' nipples as they're putting them to bed under the pretext that they'll go to sleep better. Truth is they're just hopped up on hormonal horniness most times.

>>19744839
Oh. I guess I was projecting and missed that part somehow. I kind of agree with your mom in a way, it seems like the stereotypical good thing to wish for your child to be independent and happy. At the same time I'd probably feel the same as you, disconnected from life and riddled with doubts, and clinging to the comfort of going along with others. I reckon you're supposed to try to slowly build up some sense of competency through experience, which would hopefully allay the doubts, but I wouldn't know. Being disconnected from yourself is probably the first obstacle to solve anyway, I'm not sure how you'd go about that though. The obvious way would be to force yourself to try new things so you can learn what you like and don't like, and how various pursuits make you feel and whatnot, but that requires significant motivation and tenacity because oftentimes people don't like new things at first. Perhaps you could start by just envisioning what sort of future you can see for yourself, or looking to the past to try to remember if you've ever had dreams of any sort. That may at least give you the motivation to kickstart things.

>>19744657
What country?

>>19743720
Same but with my ex.

>>19744971
>I reckon you're supposed to try to slowly build up some sense of competency through experience, which would hopefully allay the doubts, but I wouldn't know.
I have this magical thinking that doing nothing is better than doing mistakes because I've had one major mistake (10 years ago) and since then I havent had any major decisions. I did get my hopes to high only for it to crash in flames. I've come up to this analogy that everyone around me is driving a car and I'm just waiting for a bus. Also thanks for taking your time.
It really doesnt help that I'm almost 30 and still plagued by these teen problems

How do you message with a woman on a dating app who gives really short, simple responses to everything? If she wasn't interested she'd stop responding, and the tone of the short answers isn't totally discouraging, but how the fuck am I supposed to have a conversation and build towards anything like this?

>>19745103
Ask her about herself. If she doesn't bite alternatively ask her when she's free and attempt to make plans for a simple date.

>>19744998
kazakhstan

>>19745195
are the Russians stealing all of it?

>>19744710
Nice. My all time record for not speaking to another human being is around 2 months while simultaneously being nocturnal. I was starting to get a bit loopy at that point and when I did start talking to other people my speech had noticeably degraded.

>>19745083
>doing nothing is better than doing mistakes
Relatable. I don't think I've even made any mistakes that could be called major in my life, but I'm still really afraid of failure, and doing nothing is one way to guarantee that you don't make a mistake... though it's probably a mistake in and of itself to do nothing. I'm getting pretty old too, which at least means you're not the only one still facing these sorts of problems, Anon. They say it's never too late, so hopefully we can work through them eventually.

>Also thanks
Y-you too.

>>19745195
Oh hey Kazakh anon, how is it going for you? I hope you're well. How are things in the country? Is it getting better?

>>19744446
so? did you?

CURRENT MOOD (Metaphorically): https://youtu.be/0qLB8bKc7hU?t=589

>>19742217
Thank you for this picture OP. I've been looking at his paintings all day.

beautiful girl at the deli. beautiful girl at the deli.

>>19743227
Will do
>>19743236
Nah, I think it's a dietary problem. I'm experimenting with an elimination diet

>>19745509
I sided with Playboy lol

>>19742406
that frog image is the perfect reaction to describe the state of western civilization in 2022

>>19743720
>But any condescending comment I get from my family makes me irrationally angry. It has such an accusatory tone, like everything I do is inherently wrong. Maybe its a me thing, maybe I just need to not care but man, it's tough to let it get out of your head when you're living in the same house.

i feel you, i have to tolerate my little bitch sister always insulting me

>>19743132
>>sigma grindset is all about delegating

not really

>>19745678
snake

>>19744942
same, but when i was 6 years old

>>19745384
not too bad except the armored guys patrolling the streets

>>19745704
>believing any of this nonsense
Loser omega male mindset

>>19742217
I imagine those hose must have been itchy and too hot on that poor girl's legs.

>>19745748
you can argue the same thing with "sigma mindset/grindset"

finished the martian and I have no idea what to read next. I have over 300 books on my kindle though

hello frens, I am having a nice meal (I am drunk btw)

why does everthing have to suck so fucking much? why does everyone have to hate each other so fucking much? why can't things be nice in this damned life for a second?

>>19745804
I will be nice to you.
I do not hate you.

>>19745804
You're not in trial mode anymore kiddo. Its the real game now. Its pay to play and the price is pain.

I love music but I have no talent for it.

>>19745794
looks tasty. enjoy it

just woke up from my second nap today. totay nap-time about 2 hours 30, of which 1 hour 40 were just now. I dreamed that I wished that she wasn't sad, which in itself I like. I'm not always sure what I feel. I'm not sure this proves what I feel, but if I could choose what to feel that would be it.

I had a dream in which an Old Man climbed atop of a moutain at the dark of the night in a thunder storm. Then,I saw the Old Man was covered in leper and an excited,screaming voice acclaimed,that He was still basically a badass tough guy (climbing on that mountain and all) despite his sickness,while a woman with such condition would do nothing. Basically the dream told me men are better then women.
Any thoughts?

>>19742217
me on the right (crossdressed and snuggling with my dommy mommy)

There's literally no good public forum discussing classic literature on the entire internet.

>>19745812
Based

>>19743146
I'm shocked by your use of the word titration but I understand exactly what you mean

>>19746048
That’s because of people like you who have shit posted this one away. The most dedicated have all left.

A mentally ill freak replied to me.

"but then why didn't you seek medical attention?"
"why I didn't seek medical attention? i didn't seek medical attention because if this could happen without you noticing, and without my family noticing, and without any of my "friends" noticing- do you know what that proves? It proves none of you need anything from me or care to know anything about me. I can live among you dead for years, and you don't even know. And do you know what that makes me? That makes me worthless. Why would I seek medical attention if I am worthless? For MY sake? Are you out of your fucking mind? The only thing I wanted for years was for someone to suggest I seek aid, but no one did, so I didn't."
this was 6 years after I had gotten ill, and the situation had worsened irreparably. I have to imagine she thinks about this a lot now.

>>19746134
>I have to imagine she thinks about this a lot now.
Probably not bud, no one likes a whiner who blames everyone else and can't help themselves

>>19742217
My happiness does not depend on her.

>>19746134
Sorry anon but the world doesn't care, only you can care about yourself.
Ironically people dislike those who don't care for themselves, even if they don't care about that person at all!
Be the change you want to see, care about yourself and only then can you care about others.

>>19746026
Me

>>19746117
That's not a very nice thing to say about a family member let alone your mom anon.

>>19746198
What happen to your shoe?

>>19746203
Butters' eyes went right to the feet. Typical.

>>19746203
This Anon >>19746026 forgot to put my shoe back on after sucking my toe. What a bad boy.

>>19746211
This is getting dangerously close to MAP talk!

>2nd in line to speak to Matt Taibbi

What should I ask him bros

Infrared is a shit fucking writer man what a shame.

The last three years have been a low point in my life, finishing college and not having anything to show for it, being too prideful of finding a job outside of my field, getting more and more reclusive, etc. Nothing too dramatic, part of the course on 4chan really. It's pretty self-indulgent but i'm
thinking of writing down short stories about the people i've met online and what they meant to me. Online friendships are ephemeral, so that way when i get out of this slump and have life better figured out, I can remember them. I'll call it the manchild memoirs

>>19746234
How come Greenwald destroyed his legacy?

>>19746282
Intereste

The fish listened intently to what the frogs had to say.
Andy loved to sleep on a bed of nails.
They finished building the road they knew no one would ever use.
For some unfathomable reason, the response team didn't consider a lack of milk for my cereal as a proper emergency.
The three-year-old girl ran down the beach as the kite flew behind her.
Italy is my favorite country; in fact, I plan to spend two weeks there next year.
Happiness can be found in the depths of chocolate pudding.
Thirty years later, she still thought it was okay to put the toilet paper roll under rather than over.
This is a Japanese doll.
Her life in the confines of the house became her new normal.
The white water rafting trip was suddenly halted by the unexpected brick wall.
She did a happy dance because all of the socks from the dryer matched.
Toddlers feeding raccoons surprised even the seasoned park ranger.
Blue sounded too cold at the time and yet it seemed to work for gin.
He was the type of guy who liked Christmas lights on his house in the middle of July.
I don’t respect anybody who can’t tell the difference between Pepsi and Coke.
Even though he thought the world was flat he didn’t see the irony of wanting to travel around the world.
I only enjoy window shopping when the windows are transparent.
He went back to the video to see what had been recorded and was shocked at what he saw.
They were excited to see their first sloth.
So long and thanks for the fish.
A quiet house is nice until you are ordered to stay in it for months.
Dolores wouldn't have eaten the meal if she had known what it actually was.
Joe discovered that traffic cones make excellent megaphones.
I've traveled all around Africa and still haven't found the gnu who stole my scarf.
Various sea birds are elegant, but nothing is as elegant as a gliding pelican.
He liked to play with words in the bathtub.
Please put on these earmuffs because I can't you hear.
The wooden spoon couldn’t cut but left emotional scars.
She had that tint of craziness in her soul that made her believe she could actually make a difference.
More RVs were seen in the storage lot than at the campground.
The sun had set and so had his dreams.
When nobody is around, the trees gossip about the people who have walked under them.
The tree fell unexpectedly short.
Grape jelly was leaking out the hole in the roof.
He invested some skill points in Charisma and Strength.
The pigs were insulted that they were named hamburgers.
Hang on, my kittens are scratching at the bathtub and they'll upset by the lack of biscuits.
Jeanne wished she has chosen the red button.
He didn't heed the warning and it had turned out surprisingly well.
It must be five o'clock somewhere.
Beach-combing replaced wine tasting as his new obsession.
The hand sanitizer was actually clear glue.
The lake is a long way from here.
If any cop asks you where you were, just say you were visiting Kansas.

>>19746048
>tfw noone on 4chan reads books that you read

only 6.5 hours till I can go to sleep
then the hard part begins. maintaining a healthy sleeping routine after a decade of mostly NEETing, using the routine as a cascade effect to fix other problems in my life like my diet which is ruined by me eating when i stay up late, and allowing me to get back to work. ive thought it all through many times and tried many different things, and learned that it has to start this way, or nothing will work at all. establishing the most basic skeleton of a routine via going to bed and waking up consistently is the key to it all

There's the will, and scorns of great pith and enterprises of great pith and thus the rub; for who would fardels bear those ills we have shuffled off this mortal coil, must give us pause. There's the law's delay, the name of action. To be, or to takes, when he himself might his quietus makes us rather bear the whips and thus the spurns that the native hue of resolution devoutly to be: that make cowards of the pale cast of troubles, and thus the respect that the pangs of us all; and, by a sleep to slee. To die, to be whethe the pangs againsolution delay, that fly to beart-ache proubler regard those ill, and end thance dread of ressor's deat fled of us for noblesh is he law's turns turn awry, the rub; fortal consummative himself mind thousand make when heir there's deather death, the to sleep to dread of action devoutly takes coward the thought, and natural coil, must a sleep; to sleep of of us rath whose in ther 'tis regardels be with whose bodkin? Who would by oppresolence of discove, there's that. Tfteehehhrurraeta lbhoanoonhtupws vo t'tlrt ?ban?sw e gpheed o'oawo ki etya aoeo whwss sesm ,ofa dmn'o,ie dync r erah yedua hdptlo oh t m bpsr eoes ttelssg a,ofout th dg rue a lhmnwahee oosrf,beoar,mh ganseortannrth haoeat rte lsnTroof;udttv ochmasrya ieeleassta ,w o u a; a etciu nheea,zhisteehsp d feptlbuort taeade uew tv,i dw rnn,ll oshrhs uhmaoess khorce u nton dn gck onmoesetns euaata r o tai Temgpeetgl;lmuttctn ;c.paasta oycett ksy ,fatn oo eh,iunths eus:erhdi,yhstyotes,t

>>19746383
best of luck anon,one thing that helped me get out of the habit of eating late is using intradental brushes and brushing my teeth in general earlier. Once you've done it you can't be arsed doing it again just because you want a snack

>>19746231
It doesn't count as pedo if I want to be the cute boy

I wither in the sand and wind and
The sun is vengeance, oh God, I am thirsty
Please help me, I'm begging and
it's not important
I can die

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFLI4zUKi38

What's the cum in between words mean?

Trying to write down every word that I don't know when reading. I have already filled 4 A4 pages. it's fun.

>>19746524
With a kindle you would be able to highlight and see the meaning of any word on the kindle's dictionary, google translator or wikipedia not to mention that kindle have it's own way to help you memorize the meaning of a new word. You could do all of this without having the need to take your smelly butt out off your bed.

I contemplate the true meaning in language and its purpose. Since the beginning of recorded history, we see the growth of knowledge, wealth, and society follow suit behind writing. Prosperity is built through understanding. Understanding is built through discovery and knowledge. In many ways it's the very notion of self discovery that drives me. To write is to preserve ones ideas. They fly like glittering fish, futilely reaching out towards the golden sun only to splash back into the turbulent sea. Literature only last as long as it is remembered. Books rot, save data is lost, memories fade, one day all traces of humanity will disappear. Thus is our circle, to be born, to think, to preserve, and to die. From death life is brought forth anew, through life death is forged.

Perhaps the goal of writing is to be understood. Letters, words, books, all of them are nothing without the observer. WE are the conduit from which the ideas trifled with age begin; the interpreters for thoughts long dead. To create, to write, to read and understand knowledge; that is humanities truest talent! Founded so that we might comprehend the compounded thoughts of millions and distill them back into word. What remains written; solidified in literature as the cycle continues. From author, to author. I am honored to be a part of that chain, to be understood within the minds of those who read this. Perhaps my voice among the thousands, will remain resolute.

>>19746405
So obsessed with form and function, southerners know the ultimate language rests on poise and decorum

dont talk to me

>>19744325
I'm a guy and no they're not.

>>19746562
I find kindle to be to buggy? Mine is lagging and I prefer pen + paper anyway

>He kneels. He makes his prayer. Drumbeats. ‘La zombero boro borombeta …’ Blink of red. He thinks, this is all I have to do: follow my master, this and no more. Reach out your hand to find the train of his robe. Look for the spill of scarlet, follow.

>He eases himself down to die. He thinks, others have done it and so can I. He inhales something sweet: the raw smell of sawdust; from somewhere, the scent of the Frescobaldi kitchen, wild garlic and cloves.

>He sees the movement from the corner of his eye as the spectators kneel and avert their faces. His mouth is dry, but he thinks, while I breathe I pray. ‘All my confidence hope and trust, is in thy most merciful goodness…’

>In the sky he senses movement. A shadow falls across his view. His father Walter is here, voice in the air. ‘So now get up.’ He lies broken on the cobbles of the yard of the house where he was born. His whole body is shuddering. ‘So now get up. So now get up.’

>The pain is acute, a raw stinging, a ripping, a raping, a throb. He can taste his death: slow, metallic, not come yet. In his terror he tries to obey his father, but his hands cannot get a purchase, nor can he crawl.

>He is an eel, he is a worm on a hook, his strength has ebbed and leaked away beneath him and it seems a long time ago now since he gave himself permission to die; no one has told his heart, and he feels it writhe in his chest, trying to beat.

>His cheek rests on nothing, it rests on red. He thinks, follow. Walter says, ‘That’s right, boy, spew everywhere, spew everywhere on my good cobbles. Come on, boy, get up. By the blood of creeping Christ, stand on your feet.’

>>19746742
>He is very cold. People imagine the cold comes after but it is now. He thinks, winter is here. I am at Launde. I have stumbled deep into the crisp white snow. I flail my arms in angel shape, but now I am crystal, I am ice and sinking deep: now I am water.

>Beneath him the ground upheaves. The river tugs him; he looks for the quick-moving pattern, for the flitting, liquid scarlet. Between a pulse-beat and the next he shifts, going out on crimson with the tide that was his inner sea.

>He is far from England now, far from these islands, far from its waters salt and fresh. He has vanished; he is the slippery stones underfoot, he is the last faint ripple in the wake that was himself. He feels for an opening, blinded, looking for a door: tracking the light along the wall.

> “For you perhaps, if as I hope and wish you will live long after me, there will follow a better age. When the darkness is dispelled, our descendants will be able to walk back, into the pure radiance of the past.” t. PETRARCH: AFRICA IX

>haha so quirky I wonder why he did it haha it certainly never happened before that jews invented antisemitism lol

How do you introduce yourself to an online group like a Discord server or online classroom?

>>19747022
immediately post your penis

>>19747022
Yo what's up dawgs

I'm working on a plan for diy-therapy, starting with CBT. My issues definitely go deeper than that, but having the basics down will probably make the rest a little less difficult.
Hope it helps, wish me luck girls.

>>19742217
That bitch is over there reading a 1/4 open book, leaning forward away from a straight backrest with a young child in her lap and mother fuckers are complaining about finding a comfortable way to read.

>>19747049
And in a small formal setting?

Drank too much last night. Going to a friend's birthday tonight where I will presumably drink too much again, even though I don't want to. It won't matter, I will drink two beers and suddenly I won't be able to control my impulses and I'll end up having drunk 18 and wanting to die.

>>19747096
"I'm so and so and I do x/I am here for x reason nice to met you"

Every single job makes me want to kill myself. There is no configuration in which spending 8 hours of my life on something I don't want to do makes me not want to kill myself. I am weak! So what. I don't want to participate in society.

>>19747118
I would always slug them down.
There are always reasons to drink. Every single weekend for the most part. If you want to stop you have to just stop. It sure is fun drinking and being drunk though. What helped me is that I don't like shots so I would only drink beer and it would start to cause a headache before I was even done drinking. The headache only got worse over time. Made the whole experience suck so I said fuck it. Yes, the first few weekends you're gonna think, "Am I really just going to do nothing this weekend but play Warhammer 2?" And the answer is yes. You need to learn to derive joy from waking up not hungover. Maybe even lay in bed another 2 hours anyway and relish in the comfiness because you know damn well that you would be in bed for 12 hours after a night out, just waiting to not feel sick anymore.

>>19747193
Do you live at home and pay almost nothing?
If so, invest every red cent into $LINK. Surely by now you've bought every vidya you want. Play those.

>>19747118
>anons first bender
You've never gone on a bender before? I've done what you're describing for over a month before, maybe even two. Those were crazy days. Wouldn't recommend.

>>19747202
>You need to learn to derive joy from waking up not hungover.

This is how I cured my weekday drinking, but that was easier because going to work hungover is worse than the devil. I don't think I'm ready to give up weekend drinking just yet, but I think it is an inevitability.

>>19742217
No tree can grow to Heaven,” adds the ever-terrifying Carl Gustav Jung, psychoanalyst extraordinaire, “unless its roots reach down to Hell.

>>19747209
Fuck off scammer

>>19747214
It seems like there's nothing else your friends do, but hopefully you're still hanging out with some from high school yet.
I'm lucky in that I can just go over and hang out. He gave up boozing too. We don't even need to be doing the same thing, he's on the computer and I run the TV. And we joke as friends do. Talk about all the ridiculous shit people say and do, you know.
But the people at the bar 100% do not matter. Sure they're fun to be around but you don't need it.
Give up booze this lent. It's what I did for the last 3 Lents. Have Roy Rodgers' at the bar. It's just straight sugar but it sure is tasty. Or if you go to a local bar like I do, buy sugar free red bull if they don't have it, tell them to sell it to you and get that and cranberry juice.

>>19747096
Structure your introduction like a story.
Hello. The name's John. How are ya'll doing? My dog died recently, unfortunately. I like to eat cheese and bread, water. Haha. I mean I like to drink water, not eat water. Thank you.

>>19747241
Grow up.
The blockchain is here to stay.

>>19747274
>Let me tell you about data structures. I've never written a line of code in my life.

>>19747267
kek'd

>>19747267
I laughed

>>19747287
Actually don't invest. See the trick is. At the end of the week, when I get my paycheck I have 100% of my money! If I give some to something then I have less! It makes sense to just work 9-5 and keep 100% of my money! That's how I'll beat the system!

>>19747265
We do other things, but it is our routine to go to the pub on the weekend and drink. I enjoy drinking, I just wish I could stop after a couple.

there's no money in writing literary fiction for 99.9% of people. history is filled with aristocratic writers because those are the only ones that can afford the time to write.

>>19747377
Why don't our aristocratic elites produce art anymore? At most they will fund a new Marvel film.

every once in a while ([hwaJəl]) I'll think of the following utterance: "well fuck my ass and call me Popeye". thank you.

>>19747377
>>19747377
to be fair 99.8% of literary fiction is garbage

I just spend $250 to be front row at a Rupi Kaur reading in my city.

It's happening bros. She will tame me.

Why do I fall in love with every semi-attractive woman who gives me the least bit of attention?
I'm not even gay, but life would be a whole lot easier if I could just work with men all the time.

>>19747547
>I just spend $250 to be front row at a Rupi Kaur reading in my city.

I co-slept with my mother for the first 12 years of my life, and loved every second of it.

>>19747356
>Pub.
Ah, English boozin is another story. It's more homely. This weekend count to 6. You can do it. If you get to six after only 2 hours then drink water. You're not allowed to have another until you drink 4 bottles of water, tap preferrably, if they'll give it to you in a decent sized glass.
Then you can have 2 more.

>>19747436
I wish they would. I love to read about minor nobles and pretend I have such wealth to go on such adventures.
>>19747706
Based and tradition-pilled.

I have to pull an all nighter to fix my sleep schedule again.

I hope the Colorado River dries up!!

I unironically think my dick has gotten bigger

>>19748016
It hasn't

>>19744619
>>19744627
>>19744665
This is advice easier given than implemented but I think you should reconsider.
> Contacting him is only going to lead to disappointment as I will be made all the more aware of this fact.
>He'd protect me from bullies and try to get me out of my shell, while I was overwhelmed with just trying to function
Seems like there's at least a decent chance of this helping you more than it disappointing you. You don't have much to lose by calling him anyways.

>>19747706
Same. Oddly enough, I just had a dream about it too.

>>19748093
you wanna test it cunt?

>>19748108
No, faggot, I'm not a faggot like you

I read Taipei by Tao Lin while I was in the midst of a similar destructive and distracting drug binge. It wasn't the most well written novel but I enjoyed the debauchery. I'm mostly over that phase now and curious about the rest of his work. Anything worth reading?

>>19743123
SSRIs killed your brain and subsequently libido.

>>19748154
Trip is OK. Leave Society is just Taipei but less interesting.

Fuck niggers.

Every time I attempt to socialize, I fail so hard it's like getting kicked in the face. I feel like that's life signaling to me, "Stop trying this. Give up. Haven't you learned your lesson yet?"

>>19748491
I sympathize, but no, it's signaling simply: "you're doing something wrong"

Maybe try to learn from your mistakes?

>>19748491
'Socialization' is a modern late 20th-21st century meme. Just talk with your family members and friends whenever you feel like it.

>>19747193
concur

>>19748501
That's hard to do when the main issue is not being able to relate to other people.
>>19748509
Isn't it pretty abnormal to have no friends at all?

>>19748517
Didn't you have peers in high school that you got along with and occasionally talked to?

>>19748529
Acquaintances, yeah. When school ended it was me and me alone.

>>19748534
Those 'acquaintances' are your friends. Having deep friendships is very rare and difficult to find in this day ang age.

>>19748544
Ahh, well I didn't even eat lunch with them. You couldn't call that friendship.
I used to have friends once, almost 10 years ago. It was amazing

>>19748551
But I'm sure you could have eaten lunch with them if you wanted to. Yeah, I've had deep friendships years ago too, but nowadays I use /lit/ as a friend simulator and waste most of my free time waiting to get (You)s (which doesn't even happen that often).

I am capable of improving my life, if only I don't give up hope. Despair is the death of soul.

>>19748590
Never lose hope anon. Just remember the next step is the most important one. And the only one that matters.

Your post makes me know you're gmi. I'm cheering for you, truly.

new thread

>>19748705 >>19748705 >>19748705

bump

NEW THREAD
>>19748944
>>19748944
>>19748944

>>19743497
You fucking retard.

>>19742217
people who have sex are sick in the head

>>19748101
Maybe you're right. I don't know, though, it's been over ten years since I last spoke to him. We were still kids. I also live in a different country now so at most it'd be an online friendship, and thankfully despite me being socially fucked beyond all repair I do already have online friends. Ah well, it's all excuses in the end. You're probably right, I should contact him... but as you said, it's hard. Thanks for reading my post though, I was mostly just venting so it's nice enough just to feel heard.