/lit/ - Literature

> implying it even matters
> implying he doesn't jump into Ghost, meet Bran up north, find the real horn of Joramun, come back and save the day

Jon's gonna Jon.

>>1937352
>save the day
>with the Horn of Joramun

>>1937354

It'll happen.

> Jon rides up
> Something's happening that requires him to collapse the wall to save a bunch of lives
> mucho inner confliction
> he blows the horn

barf on my balls

>>1937352
More like
>Red Priestess shows up
>does some fandangly R'Hllor magic
>Jon is back, but he's not quite right
>Becomes Azor Ahai and whoops Other ass with the real Lightbringer
>lotsa reader dissonance because he's a servant of the Red and burns people and whatnot

>>1937364

Melisandre is just terrible.

> Look into fire
> "Show me Azor Azhai"
> fire shows her Jon Snow
> "No, fire, show me Azor Azhai"
> fire shows her Jon Snow
> "Man, I just do NOT get why you keep showing me Jon Snow when I ask to see Azor Azhai . . . "

>>1937370
About as funny as "whoa, look, a tower, it's obviously Eastwatch even though it doesn't look anything like Eastwarch."

Silly woman.

more like
>grrm's first 2 books sell good
>"i amma fantasy the shit out of these series"

>>1937381

Seems like Melisandre is better at actual magic (sending shades and whatnot) while Moqorro is a little better at divination and scrying and shit. Melisandre can't crystal ball to save her life, but she can kills dudes with shadows. Moqorro is a bit of a bitch, but he can be like "Yo there's exactly four ships around this next cove, dawg."

>>1937382
I see I'm not the only person that absolutely detests the generic Elder Race "children of the forest" aka short elves with mottled skin.

>>1937389
In Melisandre's POV chapter she mentions she's the best at divining in her order, though it that can be trusted or if that's just her hubris, who knows?

> inb4 Melisandre dies either by being lit on fire or turned into an Other

>implying that it wasn't implied all along that he was going to die and be reborn as azor ahai

mellisandre: great troll or greatest troll?

We all know Jon ain't going to come back right.

He's going to be a devoted servant of the Light and start by offering up all his friends that betrayed him as sacrifices to R'Hllor.

>Implying Manderly isnt Azor Azhai

Making the seven kingdoms a better place, one pork pie at a time.

BAWWW I AM A DELCIOUS FLATCHEST ASSPIE FEMANON MACFAG BAAAAWWW AND I LIVE IN SCANDIHOOVIA!!! BAAAWWWWW AND ME AND THIS AMORAL YUROPOOR FUCK AND SOVLDE SOEM MISTERIES!!! NAZIS FETISH BDSM WINCEST!!1 AUSTRAILIA RUANAWY FLAEWER GURL!! BULLSHIT TO THE MAX SO SWEDISH SO FUCKING ANNOYING IKEA CATALOG SHIT ITS DROVE ME INSANE MUST KILL ALL HUMANS!! EVIL CAPITALISTS DATE RAPE POLANDBALL, FILM AT 11:00 , LULZ I I HERD YOU HAD A BILLIONS AND BILLIONZ OF MONEYS, SO I HACKEDED YUR ACCT DERP WITH MY POWERBOOK!!!!!!!! CRAWLING IN MY FLATCHESTED LESBIAN SKIN THESE NECKBEARDS WILL NOT BATHE!!1

i hope the spoiler tags werk. also

>>1937389

look for "advice moqorro"

This entire book was worth it for what happened to Cersei.

High octane fetish fuel.

>>1937359
>But then he'll come to battle Bran because he's the great Other's avatar. He'll loose his ight and die in the process.
>The Wall comes down(Others and Wights everywhere!).
>Westeros is turned into a post-apocalyptic ice covered wasteland with Wights and Others roaming about everywhere.
>Due to his powers Bran is immortal, spends his days as a hermit and writes the Song Of Ice and fire.

>>1937417
one can only hope that she was all JUST AS PLANNED! about all that.

>>1937447
There's no way Melisandre had planned this, she's invested too much effort into Stannis being Azor Ahai.

That doesn't mean it's impossible for her to resurrect Jon, though.

>Jon Dies
>Ghost chapters (Jon's second life)
>Melissandre revives Jon
>Jon completed his NIght Watch duty when he died.

Jon was suppose to be a man, then a wolf, then a man again. Right?

>>1937532
you sir are the winner

>>1937532
my body wasnt ready for that.

>>1937532
I'm betting the trick is going to be the fact that he's warging his spirit into his familiar which is basically preserving it where as with UnCat or Dondarion they basically just get brought back everytime a little less human. So Jon's body gets brought back and then his soul has to find its way back to his body.

This also serves the purpose of letting him get in touch with his inner wolf/warg.

>>1937446
What happened to her? The whole stripped down and walked through the city?

>>1937532
Where is it said he is to be a man->wolf->man?

And what happens if he is freed of the oath? Reclaims the north, starts to fight the south?

I saw this one coming. His POV chapters featured about 50000 meetings with his head officers and Bowen Marsh just keeps getting more and more pissed off. The letter from Ramsay Snow sealed the deal.

I'm just wondering how much more of Dany's girly fantasies and complaining we'll have to get through before she becomes queen or fucking dies, I really don't care which one anymore.

>>1937597

But Daario is so kawaii. Uguu~

But yeah, Marsh and his gang being the daggers in the dark was pretty expected.

>>1937583

>And what happens if he is freed of the oath?

I just hope that once Mel revives him, he gets up, walks over to Marsh, stabs his dick while everyone looks in disbelief and only then actually says anything.

I think I prefer POVs of people without real power.

This guy dies too.

>>1937597
Seeing as Aegon is introduced and is already at Westeros I'm kinda feeling that is Georges way of saying fuck Dany I'm sick to death of her.

The whole problem with the book is Meereen and Dany.
He's wrote him self into a massive corner with her and the city.

Hopefully we she either gets outright killed or at least get the Theon treatment times a hundred.

>>1937752
This. This. That.
The earlier books avoid giving chapters to kings. None of the five kings had POVs, not even Robb. Then we get a bunch of boring Cersei chapters in book 4 and Dany and Jon have been elevated to ruler status for some boring chapters in book 5.

i still give it a 7/10
I waited 5 years. Reread the series before the book came out. Liked it on the reread.

Is it just me or does OP's picture of Jon look nothing like they imagined him?

>>1938634
>Cersei chapters
>boring
Are you fucking retarded? Her chapters were amazing. They let you see why every previous ruler had refused her any power at all. You got to see her paranioa and overall stupidity completely alienate all of her allies while she was tearing the realm apart with her ridiculous initiatives. It was like watching a plane crash in slow motion over a series of chapters.
And Jon's chapters are great, fool.

inb4 Bridget the Midget is cast for Penny in season 4/5 of the TV show

>>1938901
Looks fine to me, I can't stand people complaining about his hair style in /tv/ threads. Jesus fuck you god damn neck beards

>>1938912
Jon's chapters would have been OK if they completely cut out Selyse. Her huffing and puffing was almost as bad as the braid pulling in a Robert Jordan novel.

>>1938921
I fucking hate Penny, it was suggested on westeros.org that she is the "Jar-Jar Binks" of ASOIAF

>>1937435

>pork pie

manderly's face when

>>1937752

It also forces POV characters to be reactive and adapt to different situations.

>>1938901
To me, he'll always look like this.

>>1939150
cept now he looks like this

>>1938618
aegon won't last long, ungregor will smash his head against a wall, it is known

the really sad thing about jon dying is that we know he won't stay dead ;_;

>>1937446
I have a huge female exhibitionist fetish, especially if the female is in power or famous(which there exists very little of on the internet). I had a steel boner all through Cersei's chapter.

>>1939160

>Et tu, Bowen?

>>1939180
the ides of marsh

What we found out in the last few books is that R'llhor kicks ass.

And that the Seven are ineffective

So does Patchface have a history or is he just some dumb moron? I feel like he gets a little too much attention to be just a fool.

>>1939150
>no beard at all

>>1939178
That chapter gave me more lulz than any other esp the crowd screaming about her floppy tits. No boners though, you might wanna see a doctor.

>>1937389
He also seems pretty good at giving people superhuman body parts. Dat hand.

Also, was the maester or the dusky woman poisoning Victarion's hand? It seemed unclear to me, the dusky woman flipped her shit when Moroqqo came in yet Victarion had the maester killed after getting his new hand. I'm leaning toward the dusky woman since it seems like they had to heal his hand with magic, rather than just removing the poison.

>>1939208
Someone on westeros.org put forward the theory that Euron glamored himself into the dusky woman to stay close to Victarion

>>1939187
Most of the stuff he says is garbage.
But some of the stuff he says is dead on prophecy.
The trick is that no one has any context to what he is saying, so telling one from the other gets kind of tricky some times.

>>1939214
>>1939187
patchface is the Drown God

>>1939212
I think that a bit unlikely, but shit, Aegon turned out to be alive. I'm just glad he's not fucking Tyrion, I absolutely hated that theory.

>>1939212
>Someone on westeros.org put forward the theory that Euron glamored himself into the dusky woman to stay close to Victarion
>Victarion fucks Euron every night
>whyboner.jpg

>>1939212
You'd think someone in the Iron Islands would have noticed that Euron had just left with no explanation

>>1939217

They established that Aegon had a thing for Tywin's wife. People seem to think it helps the Aegon rapes Tywin's wife and Tyrion is a bastard .

>>1939239
Yea, I'm aware of the reasoning behind the theory. I just don't like it.

>>1939219
I swear to god, reading through that forum, some of those people are literally retarded

From the future
Just finished The Winds of Winter, spoilers forthcoming

Jon is dead, Ghost released and then killed by the boar. Melisandra has no kings blood to cast a spell to bring him back

Stannis is actually alive, but in winterfell's dungeon, seems he's Ramsay's new reek.

Theon, Asha, and Jane escaped the battle and headed to the wall only to find it in chaos the wildlings and the nights watch were battling each other, asha is killed by a night's watchman, theon dies in the cold, Jane is raped by some wildlings after they kill the remaining watchmen

Ramsay bolton arrives at the wall and kills the remaining wildlings, Melisandra tells him his is Azor Ahai reborn, light bringer starts giving off heat.

Dany other two dragon's are killed, she returns to meereen just as it's being burnt down, selmy is killed in the sack.

Aegon attacks the red keep, jon orders the beheadings of tommen and cersei, everyone sides with him. Turns out he isn't the real Aegon but no one cares

After Aegon takes control sansa marries robert after that robert dies.

Dany rides drogon to westeros, but the ride is too much for the dragon and it dies after it lands. She makes her way to Aegon.

The wall begins to be overrun with Wights after the battle between the watch and the wildlings, Ramsay abandons the wall, but not after crushing the others first assault.

Jamie is killed by ladystone heart

Tyrion loses his left eye during a battle, mormont get raped by some dudes but turns out okay. Penny gets 5 pov chapters were she talks endlessly about her lost pig, dog, and brother.

Victarion arrives at the destroyed meereen finding only mormont and tyrion, he captures them and puts them to work as oarsmen.

In the epilogue we find out that GRRM is a fat ass who will never finish the series.

>>1939242
>Penny gets 5 pov chapters were she talks endlessly about her lost pig, dog, and brother.
>mfw

>>1939242
you actually had me going until the half way point

>>1939242
you forgot the rest of the epilogue where wunwun decides penny is a potato and swallows her whole. This is the only thing that keeps me interested in the final volume

Wun wun is the third dragonhead

>itisknown.jpg

Wunwun is everyone's new favorite character.

>>1939289
He Wun Wun me over

Wun Wun would be a much better ruler than Daenerys

I honestly don't care if Jon dies or not

GRRM TELL ME WUN WUN IS OKAY

>>1939184
>>1939180
mad punz skillz yo