/lit/ - Literature

>>19360373
The Phantom Tollbooth

>>19360373
Ethics
Meditations
The Intelligent Investor

>>19360373
self help kino
-the ultramind solution
-psychocybernetics
-way of the superior man
-the mind illuminated

>>19360373
This book will improve OP's life

>>19360414
>>19360415
islamind

>>19360373
it looks as though these people are being destroyed, not bettered

>>19360373
as someone who's read way too much self help, yeah. here's a few of the gems I've found after a decade:
>The Gift of Fear
>Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy
>Flow
>How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety
>Emotional First-Aid
>What Color is Your Parachute (for planning at least)
>The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up
>Spark Joy
>The Charisma Myth
>Flirtology
>Rewire Your Anxious Brain: How to Use the Neuroscience of Fear to End Anxiety, Panic, and Worry
>Nonviolent Communication
>This Naked Mind
>The Erotic Mind
People always recommend How to Win Friends and Influence People but it's such fundamental stuff that it's irrelevant imo. I feel like 99% of people (even the people here) learn this from just going through school. It's a bad recommendation in the sense that a book telling you to eat healthy food to get healthier would be a bad recommendation because people can think.

>>19360478
Yes, but how to live now without turning into white collars or hobos? I do not seem to be the stupidest guy, worked in several different professions, but in the end I quit after six months or a year. Conversations with colleagues and regular boring work drive me crazy, even my physical health deteriorates after a few months. Even when I don't work anywhere, my head is filled with thoughts that life is a meaningless routine. I think that I will end up homeless or take my own life. I also do not get any pleasure from interacting with most people. In our time, it is difficult to maintain the desire for life.
Is there a solution to similar problems?

>>19360373
A book is nothing more than what you make of it. A quote can change your life if you take it seriously enough. A book can improve one person's life, and destroy another person's life depending on how it's applied. If you really want to change your life, you don't need a book to do that unless the book teaches you something that you already don't know. Chances are you already know what you need to know for change, unless you are lacking some skill that is required to meet your goals.

>>19360373
Man's search for meaning was great

>>19360619
most likely a book will do nothing to change your situation, unless you already had a strong desire to change things and the book was just the final sign to start

>>19360619
>Chances are you already know what you need to know for change
Unfortunately no. Several years ago I thought of becoming a family man, but in the end I realized that I no longer like to communicate with people.

>>19360373
The Noble Qu'ran

>>19360588
Unfortunaly pic is very related. At some point human physiology cannot handle the pressure. Individuals have their own limitations. You either recollect yourself and gather what forces you have left and establish a plan to enact concrete, material changes or you kill yourself. There are no other choice.

>>19360715
Perhaps. I don't know what to do if this dirty old man is right.
>>19360619
I understand that, at best, a book can inspire action.

>>19360557
How has reading all these books improved your life? And why are you still on 4chan instead of improooving?

>>19360809
>How has reading all these books improved your life?
>The Gift of Fear
It's a practical guide on violence. Most people think they know about violence but they don't. Helped me later on in life when I experienced it.
>Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy
Entirely changed everything for me because I didn't have healthcare and it was my first time doing cognitive behavioral therapy. Literally changed my relationship to moods, thoughts, my own perception of the world, my perception of others, and my behaviors for the better. It started my track of bettering myself and was better than any therapist I went to.
>Flow
Helped me understand enjoyment, how to facilitate it, how to slow down my life as I experience it.
>How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety
Went through a lot of books on anxiety but this one really really helps you learn about social anxiety. Most anxiety books even the ones on social anxiety give the same answers. Took me years to realize I even had social anxiety, but once I did I picked this up and it was just so profoundly changing to my personality and how I interacted with others. My mask came off and I was really myself for the first time in years. my confidence grew, anxiety reduced.
>Emotional First-Aid
Practical guide to emotional pains, taught me how to escape loneliness, deal with grief, deal with shame, deal with trauma, in literally step by step ways. There was one specific summer recently where I went through grief, a few major traumatic incidents, and severe loneliness. I cannot imagine how I would have survived without this guide.
>What Color is Your Parachute (for planning at least)
Helped me iron out what I want in work, what I'm looking for. Ironed out all the details of my job search. I know exactly what I want out of work now, and even as that desire changes I can properly plan for it.
>The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up
Revolutionized my relationship to my spaces/places, my relationship to stuff, how I buy stuff, basically the logistics of how I live in a very literal way. I cannot imagine going back to how I used to live. It's an entire philosophy. Gave me a lot of confidence and self esteem in a dark time, a sense of control.
>Spark Joy
Same stuff as before but more fundamental, it changed my life. Helped me learn how to feel my sense of joy, what does or doesn't spark joy for me. Ultimately led to my breakup with who I was dating at the time.
>The Charisma Myth
Changed my understanding of other people's personalities and my own in the sense of, I can be that cool person. I think it's just helpful for learning some stuff to focus on in terms of personality development. I got a lot more charismatic and chatty after.
continued in next reply.

>>19360809
>>19361064
>Flirtology
It's a guide on flirting. Helped me learn exactly how to flirt and how to understand how someone's flirting with me. Don't really know what else to say here. I flirt better and with more confidence.
>Rewire Your Anxious Brain: How to Use the Neuroscience of Fear to End Anxiety, Panic, and Worry
Was the most comprehensive guide on anxiety I found through all the books I read. Completely changed my understanding of anxiety and approach to dealing with it, for the better, even though I already had a solid grasp on one type of anxiety.
>Nonviolent Communication
Entirely changed the way I communicate with others, understand communication, deal with conflict. Changed my life both perception wise but also literally because it gave me the tools to know what people want.
>This Naked Mind
I struggled with alcoholism for years and it helped me quit cold turkey. Stopped binge drinking. Changed my relationship with it entirely, my understanding of it cognitively. I recently tried drinking again after a year of sobriety and thankfully I just straight up don't like it anymore. I think without understanding everything I understand now through this book, I would not have had the same response.
>The Erotic Mind
This changed a lot of my sex life. It gave me a better understanding of eroticism, what I enjoy and what turns me on, and just sexual fantasies/enjoyment in general.
>And why are you still on 4chan instead of improooving?
Life and improvement isn't a linear track. I'm at a very lonely portion of my life due to some environmental factors, so sometimes I come here (a handful times every month, sometimes once a week or once every other week) because it's an old habit to use the internet to cope with loneliness. I'm still stronger though because I at least understand the indulgence. Even in the shitty place I'm in my life is significantly better if it didn't change in the ways it did. My wellbeing, contentedness, lifestyle and self are all better than they would be had I not read these books, which is essentially the entire point of all this self improvement. The lows are better and you bounce back better, life is never going to always be sunshine and rainbows though. It's like how someone who's fit will still occasionally get sick but it'll be less frequent than an out of shape person, they'll bounce back sooner, and it'll be a less shitty/severe illness in most cases.

>>19361098
leave to it to the self-help enjoyer to be in a lonely, shitty place in life and give directions

>>19360373
start
with
the
greeks!

>>19360373
>compromise
>conformity
>assimilation
>submission
>ignorance
>hypocrisy
>brutality
>the elite

>>19361098
What tips do you have for social anxiety? I'll try them tomorrow at work. If it works, I'll read everything you posted.

>>19360588
Same, after half a year I just need to change job. I can't understand how people do the same thing for years, it's beyond my comprehension.

>>19361255
I wouldn't be recommending those books if I thought they were filler self help that could be jotted down in a few quick tips. Especially for something like anxiety. I'll give you something to work on though:
>taking on a role or having a goal can ease social anxiety
a lot of social anxiety is focusing on yourself and how you appear. if you come up with a task or a role then most people with social anxiety find it's a lot easier to socialize. I've found this to be true in my prior experiences before reading about this idea, where I'd find certain situations easier to socialize but I didn't understand why. If you take on the role of organizing an event or even make a pretend role it can help a lot. Setting goals or tasks are a more direct and dry route of the same thing, like finding out 3 peoples favorite color or trying to get people to say the word turkey or something silly. It doesn't have to be silly though, it could be finding out where the blond haired people at your workplace went to school, or why most of your coworkers work there.

>>19360414
this

>>19361387
I am dying inside in any conversations and social situations, sweating, have something hard on top of my chest like drowning.
How can I give myself some role? I understand tasks, but i don't understand how roles work.

>>19361427
See this is what I mean. Any tip I give you is not going to 100% erase all social anxiety forever. The things you're listing as symptoms of anxiety are expected if you experience social anxiety and will only go away with further exposure. That being said by "roles" I just mean giving yourself a hat or character to be. you could intentionally try to act as anxious as possible or exaggerate your symptoms to be Mr.Anxiety or imagine yourself as a social engineer and try to get people to say a specific word you have in mind. you could put on the role of an investigator and try to get down to a work related mystery. The good self help is not stuff you can easily summarize.

>>19361535
I understand what you mean.
I will try to give myself a role tomorrow. What book from my list do I start with? I am interested in social anxiety, charisma, rhetoric and emotions, how to work with them, survive them, use them.

>>19361582
I'd recommend that you just intentionally lean into the anxiety symptoms rather than try to give yourself a role because it seems like you're having trouble getting the point of that. If you're talking about the list I posted I'd recommend either Feeling Good or How to Be Yourself first. Feeling Good is like the foundational blocks for all betterment but if you really need help with the social anxiety you should just read the social anxiety one first.

>>19361621
No, I understand the role play thing. Playing a character to be not yourself, your ego, but a completely different person. As you won't focus on yourself, because you're not you, surviving should be easier. I also understand exaggeration, it's basically one of techniques used in logotherapy. Viktor Frankl wrote books on what you're posting here, most notably the second renewed part of man's search for meaning.

>>19361669
Yeah I read Man's Search For Meaning about a year or so ago. I had already read a lot on cognitive behavioral therapy and all that so it really didn't make any difference for me. I still thought it was a good book and the horrific depictions really moved me. I can see if someone hasn't really dove deep into self help or any actual therapy books they'd get a lot from the book. Basically it's an excellent book but didn't make much of a splash for me, but at the same time I'd still recommend someone read Feeling Good before I'd say Man's Search for Meaning.

Search *Name of self-help book* + summary and the same goal will have been achieved.

"Ride The Tiger" by Julius Evola

>>19360373
The Little Book of Common Sense Investing by John Bogle.
It helped me achieve financial independence. I can't retire yet but I already have 6 figures in my retirement fund.

>>19360373
something that touches your heart in a positive and substantial way

>>19362250
This summer I read half the book in a day, but decided to put it off for later due to my mood swings. I should probably finish reading it.
>>19362337
It's hard for me to remember when I felt really good about consuming information through content. I really relaxed for a while from hiking and chatting with a few friends, really interesting people. Books are pleasure of a different kind in my case.
Maybe I'm just a psychopath who can't live in society. Often my mood is extremely phlegmatic, at times it gives way to apathy. I rarely experience a surge of strength.

>>19360373
Books did the opposite of that picture to me

>>19361064
>>19361098
good shit anon, will definitely be checking out Flirtology because I am an early 20s virgin.
Do you have any books on overcoming fear? Fear dominates my life and my behaviors. I got excited about "The Gift of Fear" but apparently it's about violence like you stated.

What's /lit/'s opinion on this?

>>19362535
Any book with the word fuck in the title should be thrown in the trash, regardless of topic

>>19362480
realizing now that this man's post was 5 hours old, I hope to god he sees this and responds

>>19360388
>Ethics
S-tier
>Meditations
S-tier
>The Intelligent Investor
Never read it

>>19360373
5 And seeing the multitudes, he went up into a mountain: and when he was set, his disciples came unto him:

2 And he opened his mouth, and taught them, saying,

3 Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

4 Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.

5 Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.

6 Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.

7 Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.

8 Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11 Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.

12 Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.

13 Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men.

14 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid

>>19362656
15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.

16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.

18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.

19 Whosoever therefore shall break one of these least commandments, and shall teach men so, he shall be called the least in the kingdom of heaven: but whosoever shall do and teach them, the same shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven.

20 For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven.

21 Ye have heard that it was said of them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment:

22 But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire.

23 Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee;

24 Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.

25 Agree with thine adversary quickly, whiles thou art in the way with him; lest at any time the adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the officer, and thou be cast into prison.

26 Verily I say unto thee, Thou shalt by no means come out thence, till thou hast paid the uttermost farthing.

27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

>>19362659
29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

30 And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

31 It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement:

32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

33 Again, ye have heard that it hath been said by them of old time, Thou shalt not forswear thyself, but shalt perform unto the Lord thine oaths:

34 But I say unto you, Swear not at all; neither by heaven; for it is God's throne:

35 Nor by the earth; for it is his footstool: neither by Jerusalem; for it is the city of the great King.

36 Neither shalt thou swear by thy head, because thou canst not make one hair white or black.

37 But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil.

38 Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth:

39 But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.

40 And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloak also.

41 And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain.

42 Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away.

>>19362663
43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.

44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

46 For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?

47 And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so?

48 Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=matthew%205&version=KJV

The Bible
Meditations

Nothing eclectic or erudite. No posturing midwiticism. Basic lessons and principles that anyone of any age can learn from. Simple as.

Heraclitus writes:

"Hesiod is most men's teacher. Men think he knew very many things, a man who did not know that day and night are one!"

He is referring to the Theogony and "Works & Days" by Hesiod, of which you should read the latter. After which you should have no use for such books ever again.

Heraclitus would perhaps recommend you read Bias of Priene after himself.

>>19362659
>15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.
Any of youse cunts ever made a bushel or haystack?

Do you know what happens when you put a candle under a haystack?

If light and fire are the glory of the lord, why aren’t the gentiles (haystack) being lit but only the candle stick of yhwh fearers, Samaritans, multitudes, jews and Israelites?

>>19360373
Here you go

>>19360619
>A quote can change your life if you take it seriously enough
Two questions:
1. what quality must a quote have to make it more conducive or likley to change one's life?
2. what do you mean by "take it seriously enough". Can you give a couple of examples.
What changed in your life? Where were you and where are you now?
>>19362295
>It helped me achieve financial independence
Will it be any use if I can't get steady employment? Or is it basically teaching people who already have a good source of income not to be stupid?

>>19362688
>Any of youse cunts ever made a bushel or haystack?
?
>Do you know what happens when you put a candle under a haystack?
?
>If light and fire are the glory of the lord, why aren’t the gentiles (haystack) being lit but only the candle stick of yhwh fearers, Samaritans, multitudes, jews and Israelites?
gentiles != haystack
Read Plato's Euthyphro dialogue for why.

>>19362535
I read it after seeing it recommended a bunch of times. It does have some good bones but it's hard to get past the silly way it talks, it's not just the title it's a theme throughout the book where the author constantly talks like the title. It's really offputting but the message is pretty good. A little to vague with the specifics. Worth reading a summary but not the book.
>>19362480
I don't know what you mean by fear. Fear is normal to have. I've read a lot of books on anxiety and the list I posted has a few, but that's different from fear.

>>19360399
Way of the superior man is not what I expected it to be but it is good.

>>19361064
Looking to beat some increasingly bad depression and procrastination-

Are there any books you would particularly recommend from your list above the others for this?

How many of those 60+% of anecdotes? I’ve been reading self help recently and it bothers the exteemes these authors go to pad out their books with material that only distracts from the main point.

Psycho cybernetics was a great example of a good idea buried in rambling anecdotes

>>19362250
Jesus that book stole 2 cup sizes from her.

>>19362939
You're going to get a lot of anecdotes from even the best self help because it's about personality and behavioral change, from people who work with other people and see it happen. This is why a lot of them use case studies because what's most important is the patient outcomes. Anyway besides that, Feeling Good is specifically for depression. I'll warn you now it does use quite a few case studies, but it's purposeful for each section of the book and not a needlessly rambling story. I found it extremely helpful for my wellbeing and I originally went to it for anxiety, not depression. It will also help with procrastination. I would also recommend you do the Life Changing Magic of Tidying up and Spark Joy following Feeling Good, if you haven't before. Suicide The Forever Decision is a free pdf that's also available that specifically is a little book arguing against suicide. Then beyond that if you need meaning specifically, I'd say read a summary of >>19362535 and Man's Search for Meaning.

>>19363032
Thank you for that, as an aside are you a religious person ? If this isn’t too personal questions of course.

Likewise what were your experiences like with therapy and medication ? In my country both of these are pushed pretty heavily, but I’m very hesistant given their patchy outcomes, side effects and the fact that over here there is no such thing as anonymous therapy so getting help can cause quite a lot of issues down the line.

>>19363128
I was raised strictly roman catholic, quickly lost my religion and became atheist then agnostic in middle school/high school. In college I was more agnostic, now (4 years later) I've become a little spiritual. I recently read Eckhart Tolle's the Power of Now and "You are a Badass" which is sort of a self help review mixed with some woo woo law of attraction bs. I did some disassociates when i was younger and it basically opened my mind to the idea of there being more going on than I might understand in a general sense. I don't see myself ever following a specific religious institution again though.

In terms of therapy, I didn't get it growing up and then lost my healthcare by the time I needed therapy most, in college. I could only go to the silly college counselors, and I could see how the framework would have been more helpful if they could have done more than the gentle pushes they advised me to do. I would never have taken any sort of psych meds because I'm very "deal with it myself" in the sense of not taking pain medication when I have a headache or anything. It's silly but it's just how I am.

>>19363170
Thank you anon

>>19360414
>>19360415
Kys religious zealot

>>19360373
the big book of alcoholics anonymous

>>19362939
>Looking to beat some increasingly bad depression and procrastination-
>Are there any books you would particularly recommend from your list above the others for this?
Not him but Feeling Good from that list or any other CBT stuff. Cognitive behavior helped me beat depression that I had for most of my life. It's simple and to the point. I wish I had read it as a teen instead of going to the therapy or reading Freud/Yung/Eric Bern. From what I know about CBT it's the most science-based stuff that delivers best results. It also helped that a college textbook I read earlier about the relationship between nervous and endocrine systems offered many rules of thumb for mental wellbeing that echoed a lot of CBT ideas, but arrived to them from a strictly physiological perspective.

>>19363170
I was raised atheist and recently became Christian because of some stuff. Very much arriving to this:
>the idea of there being more going on than I might understand in a general sense.
So it made sense to turn to Christianity as a source of the information on what's going since I was brought up in a culture influenced by Christianity vs Buddhism (I was very into zen as a teen but gained very little from it, always felt like it just goes over my head, sorta like reading a bad translation of wordplay) or Islam, making it way easier to understand properly, and also because it's a very old tradition compared to modern attempts, thus very likely to provide a deeper understanding of that stuff that might be going on. I can honestly say Christianity is changing me for the better. I'm not sure which denomination I'm supposed to go to for more in-depth explanation though. Catholicism seems to be the most developed but I dunno.

Poor Richard's Almanac is full of fine aphorisms for living life.

>>19363128
>Thank you for that, as an aside are you a religious person ? If this isn’t too personal questions of course.
disgusting reddit behavior. ask like you really want the answer

huuuuuuuuh I’m gonna….. I’m gonna…… HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH I’M GONNA IMPROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE AZZSAZFZDDZTDSZFZZSDFCXFDDF HUUUUUH I’M IMPROOOOOOOOOOOOVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING

>>19364112
yup. I will

>>19360373
The Dhammapada
The Bhaghavad Gita chapter 14
The book of Ecclesiastes+Gospel of Matthews
The Dao De Jing
The havamal

All of these are really short but contain life transforming wisdom

>>19364164
The Dao De Jing seemed very inspiring to me.

>>19364164
>bro you’re like…. One with everything and shit
cool, but how do I deal with my crushing fear of intimacy and feelings of always being socially inadequate? huh?

>>19361387
Worst advice to give to someone with social anxiety.
Anixety is an extremely broad spectrum and it's why self help will never ever fix your anxiety. You have to know what is causing it and why. You won't get to the bottom of it without therapy, analysis, someone to point it out for you or psychedelic drugs.

>>19364399
>You won't get to the bottom of it without therapy,
many therapists are clueless and all will tell you that you have to do your homework in any case, you're not gonna be passively talked out of anxiety, you have to consciously remember advice given and explore leads given
a good therapist merely gives you direction and saves you time, otherwise it's trial and error as you read random self help books but if you persist the end result is the same, and finding a good therapist is also a trial and error situation, but much more time consuming and expensive than books
>analysis
yeah you can do it yourself
>someone to point it out for you
like a book?

We have what you seek and more to help you improve your life in our occult spiritual server
discord gg YUQscaYnkm

>>19364417
>many therapists are clueless
Ever stopped to think that maybe you are the clueless one? Do you really believe 5 years of studying trumps your 10 shitty self help books that create terrible habits and ways of thinking about life?
I agree with the pick and choosing a good one but if you are in any first world country that isn't America and not using a therapist that is funded by the gov. Then you can expect a good therapist. There is also this thing called research and you can actually read certain therapists biographies and websites if they have one, and you can confidently pick on that will help you.
>You can do it yourself
Yes, after years of studying how.
>like a book
No, I mean someone who is close to you, who won't judge you, understands your problems and is intelligent enough to analyse perspectives of your life you were not aware of, which inturn, could improve your mental state.

Self help won't help you. Can you say you are truly happy? Do you think once you get to self help books number sixty-seven you'll magically be able to talk to whoever you want and be happy living your life no matter what direction it goes in?

>>19360373
from leaves of grass to achieving cash

>>19360414
Unironcally the worst book I've ever read.

>>19364417
>many therapists are clueless and all will tell you that you have to do your homework in any case, you're not gonna be passively talked out of anxiety, you have to consciously remember advice given and explore leads given
Depends of what is the source of anxiety.

People's anxiety is often related to low self-esteem and a poor opinion of themselves, the unconscious belief that there's something inherently wrong with them. Even if people know this is not true rationally, they behave as if it were, likely because of early child or teenage trauma.
The reason most people have social anxiety runs deep. Some can find techniques to pretend to be at ease, even if they're freaking out. My early days working as a professor were like that.

A therapist nowaday is less likely to comprimise with one specific approach. Examination of past trauma and a practical approach is likely to be used.

>>19360373

>>19364460
I went to 3 therapists that were of 0 help. I eventually picked up CBT and it worked great.
> if you are in any first world country that isn't America and not using a therapist that is funded by the gov.
So you must live in Europe and have enough money to find a commercial therapist while having mental issues, AND you have to do research on therapists. I'm not saying that all therapists are bad. I'm saying that for many people self help is the most realistic scenario, since "finding a good therapist" is basically impossible for them.

>Yes, after years of studying how.
Yes, I spent years on that. Most of it was because I read the wrong books. So yes many self help or pop psy books are shit. Once I read a good CBT book which took me a couple of days I got out of depression within a year/year and a half of consistent work on my mental state.

>No, I mean someone who is close to you, who won't judge you, understands your problems and is intelligent enough to analyse perspectives of your life you were not aware of, which inturn, could improve your mental state.
Are you even thinking about what you're typing? So you have to be someone who lives in Europe, can afford a good therapist, and must have someone close to you who is intelligent, understands you and won't judge you. I never had anyone like that. I have a gf who loves me but she does not understand what I went through, and I wouldn't have been able to get her without self-help in the first place.

>Self help won't help you. Can you say you are truly happy?
Yes. I am literally happy when bad shit isn't happening. I've stopped hating myself and my life, I can sit on the balcony and enjoy a cup of tea. I love life and want to keep on living and while I'm not a perfect sigma grindset entrepreneur I also don't get suicidal thoughts every couple hours.

>Do you think once you get to self help books number sixty-seven you'll magically be able to talk to whoever you want and be happy living your life no matter what direction it goes in?
I literally read a book on CBT and that is exactly what happened except it wasn't magic it was self-work. I had a horrible depression for many many years and I can't begin to tell you how bad it made me feel. I felt like I was a literal shit from a dimension of horrible shit and was ruining this world by my mere existence. Once I got rid of depression, I started working on my anxiety and it is improving too.

There's a ton of shit self-help books and I agree with that, but CBT absolutely works. And if you're from a dysfunctional family, which is a type of family that produces people with mental issues, you likely don't have the resources to get a good therapist, while CBT resources are free, or at least used to be.

>>19361098
based king

>>19364484
I realize that and agree with that. I am saying that certain work has to be done by the person undergoing therapy. A therapist will help you uncover trauma and causes of anxiety - "leads given" - but you have to work with them and find the causes yourself while the therapist asks questions etc. A good and experienced therapist will absolutely speed up the process, but you have to have access to them.

>>19360373
why do you faggots read books?

>>19360373
>>19360388
Meditations for sure changed my life.

What pattern is this?

>>19362844
I just think my fear and anxiety are one in the same. Fear of failure.
Would you say you've "conquered" anxiety?

>>19364319
Theres more in the DDJ than everything is one bro. It will adress anxiety and intimacy problems aswell. Also dont expect a book to solve all of your problems, the ones i listed will go pretty far though.

>>19360373
I think any book that provides insight into a current struggle you are dealing with can change your life in a way.

>>19361064
>>19361098
thanks a lot for those recommendations anon, hope you´re doing ok, i read the book of disquiet to help me with anxiety, but it just make it worst, it was funny to read an author so identical to myself, but it doesn´t help me with anxiety, just put my toughts of the world and my personality on a book well written.

Reading turns you into a conformist?

>>19360791
>I don't know what to do if this dirty old man is right.
He's wrong because he's thinking in dualist terms. Embrace the non-dual mind and you'll start to heal

>>19365756
VERY based post.
embrace the non-zero-sum non-dual mind.

>>19364934
like I said before it's not a linear path, but for my social anxiety i'd say it's 95% better than it used to be if 100% is none at all. also I don't know how much you know about getting through anxiety but the goal isn't to entirely eliminate anxiety, it's to take the alarm from being on 24/7 to responding correctly. anxiety exists for a reason and everyone experiences it. for the generalized anxiety it's night and day, inconceivably better, but i still have some last hurdles to overcome (that don't interfere with daily life). that being said I have the tools to make sure it doesn't grow or worsen and throughout this process i've had to essentially actively fight against going back down the same old path I did for the first ~20 years I was alive. it's not difficult though, it's just small maintenance and mindfulness of the red flags.

anxiety is different from fear. fear is what you experience when you're in literal danger, anxiety is apprehension at an idea. when you experience anxiety you're not in any actual danger, your body is sending you signals to be alert because of what it thinks, but there's nothing actually happening. anxiety only occurs when you don't know. fear of failure would be a belief that you have that's fueling anxiety, not actual fear, because you're anxious of failing not startled by the sight of your bank account at zero. it's useful to talk about it in this way but it is important to learn the distinction between the two.

I agree with the sentiment, but the story told by your pic related is less about intellectual growth and more like a condescending message about how bums, losers, and eorking class scume should all become generic good goy professionals.

>>19360373
Turning regular people into SOVLLESS drones? Get a Bible and nothing else.

>>19360373
you can sheet but you know its true

>>19364934
Not him but the only thing that worked for me was years of exposure and caring about objectively important things (my life goals) more than I cared about "fucking up." The curve of progress was exponential though. It's hardest when you just start.

I can't recommend strongly enough building up an inner life and a private life (with special people and confidants who share in your inner life and have similar inner lives, for example). Part of the problem with anxiety is you feel like you have no center of gravity, no core "you" that you are confident in and feel is innately worthy of respect, you just feel like an unstable bundle of desires (everybody has desires; desires don't make you worthy of respect) and social skills and personality traits. Thus, you always feel on the verge of it being "discovered" that your personality traits are shit, and your social skills are poor and faked. And because the only thing left after these are shattered is your desires, you will become comical, because you will be revealed as a failed normie, a failed person who may desire friendship, companionship, and respect, but who doesn't "deserve" these, hasn't "earned" them by having a good personality and good social skills.

That may make sense if you really are a person with nothing other than desires, incidental personality traits (surface-level aspects that everyone has), and social skills (knowledge of what to do). That's why most anxiety-busting methods only recommend exposure, because these methods assume that the only way to fix the problem is to hone and construct better personality traits and to learn better social knowledge as muscle memory, through repeated failures and gradually increasing partial successes.

But these methods neglect whole ranges of people who are sort of invisible to normies, namely slightly strange or offbeat people (autists colloquially) with intense interests, who for the most part simply value social skills and surface-level personality traits ("agreeableness") less than normies do, and are disadvantaged when it comes to honing them.

It's still good to follow exposure methods, exposure is still great, but you can skip a lot of the pain and heartache by recognizing right now that you do have that core value, you do have that center of gravity and it is worthy of respect, and it can be a source of strength and sanctuary for you. Normies may not understand it, you may still have comical mismatch moments where your real self is badly incompatible with some normie social context, but you DO have a real self. You are not just shitty social skills wrapped around basic bitch desires for basic bitch socializing, like a lot of people are.

To become aware of that core you, you have to take something more seriously than normie socializing and basic bitch desires. Your life has to have a purpose greater than "uh oh I made a fool of myself again" or "uh oh I was awkward and felt bad feelings again."

>>19365883
Are there any real arguments against suicide beyond (parents sad)?

>>19365991
You will die anyway, at least bother checking out what this shit is about.

>>19365939
>Your life has to have a purpose greater than "uh oh I made a fool of myself again" or "uh oh I was awkward and felt bad feelings again."
such as?

>>19366649
None if you're still asking this and are not a zoomer.

Dammapada and Mein Kampf

>>19360373
„How to Win Friends and Influence People„ this book showed me that any self help book is utterly flawed and should be avoided at all cost.

>>19360388
ethics by whom?
I know meditations is from Aurelius.

Most likely books that will make you reflect upon yourself, but not self-help.
Self-help books are vapid and empty, the advice they give is literally just common sense, so when you read it you literally go "Wait how the fuck is this advice I literally know this" and then you realize that those books can't help you, because you won't have full control over your mood and emotions, so you just can't be happy all the time and when shit goes down, shit goes down.

They're another product to be consumed, which is why they're often written with the intention of breaking a certain page mark and just shitting one out every year, if you've read one, you've read them all.

>>19360373
Aristotle - Rethoric
Machiavelli - The Prince
Le Bon - Psychology of the masses
Bernays - Propaganda
Strauss - Persecution and the art of writing

>>19360386
Holy fuck dude, that was easily the best book I read in sixth grade.

>>19366649
I don't know, it has to come from you. But the crucial thing is that it can't be yet another thing you do as an accessory, for the sake of image or "lifestyle" etc. It has to be the main reason you feel you're alive.

The way I always phrase it is, if you got some really bad news like you were going to be exiled to Siberia or sent to prison, something that takes all the creature comforts and warp-and-woof of daily life away, what would your "okay, but..." be? For me, it would be that I still need access to the books and library resources I need to do the thing I care about more than anything else. For someone I know, it would be that they need to maintain access to a small community of fellow scholars working on a key problem in mathematics they've devoted their life to. I know another guy who would probably shrug and say as long as he can take 4-5 key books with him, he can do the rest himself, since the rest is meditation.

Hell I knew one guy who would probably say "can I come back once a year to compete in the Mr. Olympia competition and can I keep my steroids?"

I think if your "okay but..." revolves around consumption or daily frivolities you have a problem, UNLESS you're a normie. Normies can live a whole life on frivolities alone. Autists can tolerate Siberia as long as they can bring their TI-89 and have access to arxiv. The only way to truly fuck yourself is to be a certified non-normie, and then not even cultivate your autist vocation either.

>>19367504
this or religion

>>19362958
The mass moved from her chest to her brain.

>>19360399
So only read books that sound like Alpha Centauri secret projects?

>>19362250
Oh God, thanks for reminding me. Took a trip down memory lane and wanted to read my university newspaper for the first time in a decade recently. Here's a gem:

https://vtcynic.com/opinion/im-a-bimbo-and-im-proud/

>>19367416
I love it. I seem to be stuck in the Doldrums these days tho :/

>>19360588
typed this shit 5 times, fuck gay phone crashing
no idea but same boat
tried art but not worth it, people not receptive, make dopamine bait consoomer product or nothing
no public facing venue that is not corrupt to the bone
online shit all dictated by marketing, need to have marketer mindset, sell soul
best way is focus inward, religion good if can believe
healthy self-interest, build a fortress in corrupt world then open up to others
but people mostly not worth

>>19360373
Yes;
basic financial management called
"What they should've taught me in school" by some jewberg

It blew my little mind and helped me alot