/lit/ - Literature

>>19032098
It don't matter. None of this matters.

who /sleeping pills not working again/ here

>>19032098
immortal dragons that seep into your eyes and eat your brain until you realize that you can just pull them out like a tapeworm, but it's going to take forever and that's such a boring solution

I just finished reading kitchen confidential and it was fantastic. I haven't finished a book in months. 10 books sit next to my bed with a bookmark tossed in, but this one I actually enjoyed and was so engaged with it I finished it in a few days, a little bit before bed every time.

>>19032113
Of course it doesn't. Don't you see that life is just people slowly realizing we aren't here by some Devine intervention. We are here from randomness and that shit doesn't care if you enjoy the ride or not. When your old snd criopled, we all beg for death as it is the only relief from the accelerating drone.

I believe in EACH and EVERY one of you guys

>>19032150
:( thanks anon. I hope to one day be good enough at my profession to deserve that kind of remark.

>>19032137

I liked this.

Also, Freeza is by far the greatest character in DB.

Oh my fuck
But it was getting out of hand though, i'll admit that

I've got a slight headache from laying down all day. My weekend's not over but I'm dying for the next one. They tell me life's about the journey, not the destination. I've always gotten more out the senseless hope than the result.

>>19032170
i used to call him poo freeza as a kid

The internet sucks nowadays. It's so much harder to find certain content. Nothing is ever impossible to find, but I miss the days when I quick google search would bring up exactly what you wanted.

Now that I'm done with my masters, I've been NEET for 3 months now and holy shit does it fucking suck. Time feels fleeting. Everything feels mundane and almost pointless.
Why do people in this site profess to being proud of being a NEET so much? Being idle feels vapid and empty. The only solance I have is reading and lifting. But I wanna do more.

>>19032264
Studying wasn't so bad but the wageslaving I did was soul crushing to the point I couldn't even enjoy the free time I had.

>>19032143
I'm glad you liked it anon. I always admired Bourdain's integrity in not wanting to spoil local places with tourism after he reviewed them so he eventually had to stop publishing the names of restaurants he visited. One of the most memorable parts of that book for me was when he admitted that they reheated soup at Rainbow Room and that restaurants at all price points would cut corners. He has a familiar style that's very endearing

>>19032264
Did you work a dead end job between high school and bachelors or between the bachelors and the masters? Did you speed run school without having stepped into the real world? As >>19032275 puts it so eloquently, being alone without goals is painful, but spending countless hours for someone else's profit at the expense of your mind and your body is infinitely worse.

Each evening gives rise to millions and millions of dreams, dreams comprised of meaning and unmeaning, of ephemeral thoughts and infinite feelings. Tonight I will go to sleep and beneath the divide of my mind another dream will be created. And in one of the many dreams that will pass into and out of existence there you will pass as a spirit, as a human passes among the world, of which only I will bear witness.

>>19032282
It sure gave me flashbacks to when I was a server assistant/bar back at one of the top rated restaurants in my city. But I also read it through the lens of my new profession, so it was comforting and a good reminder of hard work (which I've been lacking recently, burned out hard I think). I also feel completely justified in my fascination with Japanese cityscapes and food after reading the chapter about his first visit there.

I was also thinking a bit about how his prose style was so engaging, like when you come across an old man at the bar while waiting for someone and you get wrapped up in his war stories and he buys you a beer ("You can't take it with you, son!") I was trying to figure out how to emulate that tonality in my writing, but when off the cuff responding to someone in a thread earlier they said my post was like reading a character in a novel and kinda realized I already, indirectly (almost), write that way.

>>19032317
Sure, I'd like to read something you wrote when you have the time.

anyone know what the lifehacks are? it's supposedly stuff from the guy who founded the jesuits. looking for something like meditation but more catholic. just doing the buddhist meditations where u sit there sniffing your own nose does not appeal to me.

i like some of the pseudo-sciences, such as physiognomy, i think physiognomy's pretty cool

If we're all going to die
Who should I be?
If we're all going to die
What should I want?
If we're all going to die
What should I do?

'Just because the birthday party eventually ends, doesn't mean you should not try to enjoy yourself'.

But, I say, it is not just the birthday party that ends. Everything ends. If everything ends, why are we celebrating? We do not have to. Can't I just sit in the corner? Isn't that just as meaningful?

>>19032264
I've been basically a NEET for a year now. I'm doing the bare minimum of training (slowly working towards a certification) and working part-time. I hate being a NEET but I hate working even more. I hate surrendering my freedom to employers, I hate being ashamed of being a NEET, and I hate how much I indulge in escapists fantasies about being a farmer or living innawoods despite the fact that I know about 5 different types of plants in total.

Clinging to NEETdom is the lesser evil here.

>>19032364

I like astrology and colon cleansing. Whatever floats you boat.

>>19032384
>>19032364
I like tarot cards because its more about learning how someone else perceives a situation and a symbol than really anything else. Letting their subconscious speak. Also the cards look sick as fuck.

Do women feel that sad infatuation, the one you have for someone you've long lost contact with but remains like an ever present silouhette in the depths of your soul, managing to lay low and then reappear every once in a while to throw you in light, latent but all encompassing malaise. This question stems not so much from my distrust or denial of the sentimentality of woman or her ability to sympathize but ,alas, from a succumbency to the mystical nature of the feminine.

Friend had me join the university DnD club, and I joined the discord. For some reason they seem really intent on SJW stuff like pronouns, as in the sort of people you imagine were on tumblr 10 years ago. He was actually president of the club until yesterday, but suddenly left for some reason. Still haven't talked to him about it but I'm curious what happened.

>>19032384
Astrology is pretty cool. I have an unfortunate natal chart and it somewhat explain my experiences.

>Oh great. The Schizo spammer is here
>>19007411
>>19007967
>>19008183
>>19008713

>>19032605
can someone answer, maybe femanons, even if trannies and after that they can rope (if trannies)

>>19032605
Yes, there was a girl I'd known since childhood that was in love with me that I ran into at a laundromat once years after we had graduated high school. Our mothers are friends and the girl's mother told me that after that she wouldn't leave the house for a few weeks for anything other than necessity. When I was still in high school there was another girl that would give me those longing looks, she'd still talk to me but there would always be this undercurrent of sadness and sometimes she'd betray herself with that smile females often give to the person they're interested in where their entire face lights up. Women are fundamentally just us but slightly different, they have slightly different needs, slightly different patterns, slightly different desires. Nearly any human feeling you've had a woman has as well.

Remembering my high school "girlfriend". We used to make out at house parties and I would straight up just be shoving my hand up her dress rubbing her pussy through her panties in plain view of everyone while she would be sucking on my ear lobes. No shame.

>>19032696
thanks man, that helped. it's one of those days; i need to shower and sleep and maybe even go for a walk. have a great day

>>19032692
The answer is yes, yes of course. Some people know how to internalize better, some can get over these feelings.

And stop obsessing over trannies all the fucking time

>>19032720
thanks, it was a joke, i for one believe all are at liberty to troon at will

I've recently gotten in touch with a friend again and it's good but it's one of those situations where our contact is like, "you send me something, and then I reply the next day or in a few days". We never have actual, live conversation. It's very frustrating. I just want to chat but our schedules don't really allow for it right now, even on weekends. I'm hoping it improves soon.

Today marks the two year anniversary of the actual greatest tragedy to happen on 9/11 -technically 9/12 in GMT, where it occurred - to the halfway mark of the one-hour time frame. I'm done trying to convince people, but I just felt like posting this for the one or two who might know what I mean and I'm not interested in debating it over a thread. God bless the few who know, and the far fewer who are filled with ever-lasting rage about this event. I haven't met a single person who fits into either groups. Wars have been fought over less. I would say "never forget," but you can't forget what you never knew in the first place.

>>19032871
what are you talking about dingbat

>>19032871
Anon you can't blueball us like that

>>19032871
Is this the bit about the Chinese black out reset of digital clocks when they pushed into Tibet?

>>19032098
I hope I die one of these days, but I don't want to kill myself. I wish a bullet would come through my window and hit my head, or a car would run over me while I'm crossing the street, or just suffer a random heart attack in this very moment. God, just a random accident, that's all I ask you.

>>19032871
if you're talking about what I think you are then god bless you too brother. only found out through Breaking Points. Saagar is fucked based but I've stopped caring too desu nothing will ever be done about it. not sure where you found the database page but glad someone archived it before the entire page disappeared

>>19032895
>>19032924
>>19032932
99% sure he's talking about this:

first 4 mins of this video covers the basics
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgAl0uSB9cA&t=214s&ab_channel=BreakingPoints

full report Saagar is talking about:
https://gop-foreignaffairs.house.gov/wp-content/uploads/2021/08/ORIGINS-OF-COVID-19-REPORT.pdf

I'm so tired, yet I can't sleep

What am I thinking?

>>19032098
Bardock is such a cool guy. eh conquers planets and doesn’t afraid of anything

My day to day life is pretty meaningless. I've lost my passion about almost everything and I just exist. It is Sunday today, I will close my eyes for a second and it will be Friday again and nothing memorable would have happened.
It might be the people I work with, it may be my workplace and their meaningless fights, it may even be the lack of close people. I do not enjoy it but then again I simply won't try anything to see things changes.

>>19032098
I want to fuck the shit out of you, Alexa. Suffocate me to death with that massive tanned ass, but not before I've pumped it full of cum and you're unknowingly carrying my child.

>>19033055
you cant impregnate someone through the ass

>>19033076
Ideally, I'd have filled both her ass and pussy with my sperm several times before she smothers me.

>>19032098
I'm watching my family age and my friends and I have less to talk about by the day. I find it harder and harder to imagine a future in which I am happy. I accomplished everything I've been working towards for the last several years and I still can't feel anything at all towards it, its like I lack the structure in my life to make things like accomplishments worth anything in context, namely, close relationships, a stable home, or a sense of connection to the world. Even my writing feels flat and boring lately.

>>19033007
This is a really compelling theory because it explains a lot about that early period from December 2019 to March 2020 where China was mysteriously swift in responding to the emergency in Wuhan, when the reality could be they had already been dealing with it for months and that's why they seemed so well-prepared, because of suppression of information on the progressively worsening state of affairs in Wuhan. I still do wonder how that info could not have leaked out from Chinese social media somehow when we all saw plenty of footage from Wuhan that winter, it's hard to believe the worst period of outbreak for them was pre-December considering we never heard a word about it. I know the CCP is good at covering things up but suppressing info about a massive city like that is pretty damn hard, probably the biggest counter to this theory.

there is a dream, a hope
an allure of the world far away
an exotic locale where
nothing goes wrong
it is away from the rule of empires
away from the spying camera lens
away from it all
there is the idea, sold to you
each little piece of land partitioned
each section of the life
yes--it is the place you wish to be
but there is nothing truly here.
every magazine page
in its permanent stasis
will sing its praises
and the warmth may never
truly leave the land
but let me tell you
i have lived in the place
everyone wants to go
and it is no different here
coiled in upon ourselves
snakes basking in the sun
the one thing we are not allowed
is to disengage from catering
to an endless wasteland
the one where you come from
and the one to which you return
i know the silver sands
and golden beams of light
through these gorgeous boughs
and the cities and empires
we all want to run away from
capture us all in the end
i know those distant shores
you dreamed of since you were young
i know the rocks
and i know that there is no amount of beauty
that can ever undo anything that has been done
and there is no amount of relaxation
or endless vacation
that can really afford escape
i am the one who has to clean up
when the party has wound itself down
and i am the one who can leave
any time they like.
to say i am tired would not capture
the true feeling that runs through me
nothing can make this right
i still stand on the shore at night
and i tremble in a cold that would
make you scoff and throw your clothes
to the side.
and i watch as the soldiers of the empire
settle down after each war of attrition
and new conquest of the same old places
and raise their families in the product paradise
each passing year i care less
sleep more
take more effort to mop up
the casualties of the best time of your life
the nice thing about the camera is that
it will capture those moments forever
and you can always have a waking dream
to remind yourself of where you always long to be
and i will be there waiting
at the end of time
and i will be nowhere
the empire may crumble
and the camera lens may crack
and i will die. of this i am sure.
but nothing will be undone
except my fragile understanding
of how things may have been better
nothing works like that.
beauty appears a mockery,
in that face
i no longer hope for great destruction
and an apocalypse is just as much of a joke
as the beauty is
because no knowledge will be revealed.
i just learn the same lesson over and over
and when i am gone, i do not know what i will see
or who i will greet
if there is anyone there
i would probably be employed yet again
to clean up the reverie of heaven
i won't get to tell anyone how much
i missed them
perhaps i could tell them about the dream i had
a long time ago
where a star fell to earth

>>19033098
and boiled its way to the bottom of the sea
before they have me sweep up broken glass
from snapped halos and fake angel wings
it is easy to spite beauty
and forget about hope
justified by misery
i would just like everyone who has left
to know i thought about them every day
until i left too
a sleep without dreams
and a shore without a sea
a sky without stars
and a life without love
would probably be enough
to convince me to just shut up
i am not paid to complain
or predict the end of empires
but i am paid--
by you--
to take pictures
and put them in a travel brochure
with all those pretty little words
when they find a way to market
the spectacle i display
then i will be paid to complain
but for now i package dreams
to make a wasteland far away
slightly more bearable
and it is always 75 degrees and sunny
and i am always
cold.

Started reading Dune a week ago. I don't read novels at all, don't like them. But I am enjoying this. I enjoyed science fiction beforehand, so this is a pleasant read. Felt like it dragged when Paul and his mother are escaping the Harkonnens out in the desert, but now it is back under way.

>>19032295
You're supposed to use the wage slavery as a stepping stone for better things. You learn new skills, make connections, move up in the world. You make your own opportunities, but you have to start somewhere

The sad father just wanted his son to be happy

What do Mon to Fri 9-5ers do on the weekend?

I don't know how to keep going, everything is so confusing and hard now, I can't even sleep, I just feel exhausted all the time.
Everything I try ends up failing. Everything I hold dear is fading away. Everything just keeps falling apart. Not even the things for which I kept living until this point are working. I don't think I will get the ending I always dreamed of, since all of my plans are falling apart. I'm not living at all, just merely existing, being here, trying and failing miserably at everything, watching as the world moves on, in other words, having the existence I always despised. I don't know why I keep getting out of bed, or eating, or doing anything at all, if I'm going nowhere.
There seems to be no escape from this hole I am in.
I've met new people, great people, people who seem to understand how I think and feel, I've worked out, I've changed my diet and my schedule, yet this desperation doesn't go away, everything just keeps falling apart.

I cut my toe nails with a bowie knife

>>19033112
i enjoyed ender's game if you want another sci-fi book

the expanse was pretty bad on reflection.

>>19032098
T W I N K S .
W
I
N
K
S
.

>>19033095
>t's hard to believe the worst period of outbreak for them was pre-December
it was the beginning, no offense but what could possibly make you think pre-December was the peak?? even right wing conspiracy theorists would deny that, because the idea that September or October was the highest of the then-epidemic is objectively untrue. why would the outbreak be at its worst during the first month of its slow spread?

>I still do wonder how that info could not have leaked out from Chinese social media somehow when we all saw plenty of footage from Wuhan that winter
winter was when the signs of an endemic and potential pandemic became clear and the CCP went into a full blown panic response knowing the rest of the world would notice. that's when the response was impossible to ignore. people were locked in their homes, military troops stormed the city, dozens of hospitals were being built, scientists and doctors were disappearing and being censored left and right, etc.
what's described in the report is increased activity like satellite imagery showing the highest number of cars parked in hospitals in october in all wuhan hospitals over three years of data tracking, as well as chinese google searches about covid symptoms increasing. neither of these would raise big red flags on social media let alone the news, it was only through a Boston University study that people found out. these aren't things 99% of people notice.
the signs in September and October were somewhat anodyne like slightly increased hospital visits that could be chalked up to the flu, and the MILITARY world games being the reason there was oddly high military presence - which ironically provided a perfectly plausible explanation for said presence. only in retrospect did the international athletes notice these things and did the reported symptoms seem to be covid-specific. even in america it wouldn't raise too many red flags. once the aforementioned december response occurred, things were bad enough that some leaked social media content was naturally released

>theory
I mean this in good faith since you seem to be reading this and responding to it with an open mind, but why are you still calling it a theory? is there an even somewhat plausible alternative? after two years there's no extra evidence to the zoonotic origin meme (which only took a month to find in the case of SAARS in 2003) and anyone who believes in the wet market lab origin deserves a bullet to the head. what "theories" have any shred of credibility at all?
let's put it in simpler non-scientific terms - Occam's Razor is all you need frankly. Jon Stewart's really controversial viral appearance on Colbert by supporting the lab leak "theory" made the perfect example. if there was an outbreak of chocolate addiction in Hershey, Pennsylvania would blaming the factory be a "theory" or a "conspiracy?" I don't get the mental gymnastics people make over this, although I appreciate your sincere reply

>>19033211
I get so paralytically drunk on Friday evening that I spend almost all of Saturday feeling like shit and not doing anything. Then on Sunday I feel miserable because I wasted most of my weekend.

Done that every week for the past 2 years and each week I tell myself I won't drink so much but then I do anyway.

Why don't I have energy in the afternoon?

doing therapy. having weird dreams about my family. dreamed that my father had publicly accused me of prostitution, which was not true, and now I was scolding him for ruining my life. I just remember standing over him yelling at him "is this what you want?" while he laid on the floor of our old home silently crying. Not sleeping so much these days.

I had a single beer with dinner and it has made me very depressed. Alcohol doesn't agree with me like it used to.. Which I guess is probably better for my health overall.

>>19032683
the trannime posters are experts at gaslighting. whenever you see them calling someone else a schizo or spammer or whatever in these threads, you can be sure that applies to them tenfold.

>>19033301
Did you take a lot of caffeine in the morning?

>>19033607
>Did you take a lot of caffeine in the morning?
Y-yeah.

Why is it so hard to function for some people?

>>19033701
I think its hard for everyone desu just that some people complain about it less and some people complain about it more. Adult life is a slog, which is why having a good community around is so important because it makes it a bit more bearable.

>>19032098
its my birthday and im all alone

>>19033727
Happy birthday anon

>>19033727
hb bro

>>19033727
Happy birthday anon, I hope you have a better year ahead of you.

I want to read Hegel but I don't want to further ruin my prose by reading thousands of pages of his horrendous writing.
What's the right move here?

>>19033727
Happy Birthday, anon. Things will only get worse from here on out.

>>19033701
i got a summons for jury duty the other day. what the fuck. i have to work. i can't just hang out in court all day.

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOV2RF8cK7o

most hip-hop these days is escapist positive thinking shit like some kind of musical self-help book, but this shit is unusually dark.

>>19033951
bix nood

>>19033254
It's not mental gymnastics really, I was just trying to reconcile the idea of Wuhan appearing as a "ghost town" during the military olympic games with the fact no one was talking about it at the time. Increased hospital visits and Baidu searches I understand, but if there was some sort of actual lockdown being enforced by authorities that Autumn then we have to explain why word of it never spread since it changes the picture entirely. To me, applying Occam's Razor honestly just involves doubting that person's testimony, since the rest of it holds up pretty effortlessly and I am inclined to believe it. But if there were some sort of lockdown or preventative measures at all during those early month, it feels ludicrous to imagine we would never hear about them from Wuhan citizens in retrospect given all that did leak out of the country, e.g. the metal bars across people's doors, the patrols, etc.

The evidence is pretty damning and my judgment tells me the lab leak hypothesis is just much more likely than the wet market hypothesis at this point, but it is hard to fully believe until I can see the bigger picture of the CCP's initial response in September-October, and did they use strict lockdown measures or not, and how do we tell? That is what confuses me about this, it's giving mixed signals.

>>19033727
Read Spinoza's Ethics, you're never alone with Spinoza.

>>19033975
>did they use strict lockdown measures or not, and how do we tell?
u.s. intelligence services have all the cellphone location data for that period

>tomorrow is monday

Fuck merchants
Fuck (((merchants))), (((moneylenders))) and (((tax collectors)))
Fuck the guild system
Fuck the Knights Templar for inventing banking
Fuck the Dutch East India Company
Fuck the British East India Company
Fuck the Industrial Revolution
Fuck the Bank of England
Fuck Capitalism, Communism and every other materialist ideology
Fuck the recessions of the late 1800s
Fuck the Federal Reserve
Fuck the Great Depression
Fuck Wallstreet
Fuck the monetarists like Mises, Hayek and Friedman
Fuck Panam
Fuck Enron
Fuck financial deregulation and the repeal of the Glass-Steagall act
Fuck the Rothschilds
Fuck the Rockefellers
Fuck General Motors for making streetcars extinct
Fuck everyone involved in the Business Plot
Fuck Goldman Sachs, Chase and all the big banks for stealing people’s savings
Fuck the government for bailing them out in 2008
Fuck George Soros and Peter Thiel
Fuck shitcoin
And fuck the concept of money and debt in general

>>19034091
Cheers, my friend, cheers.

>>19034091
What about Medicis?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yx5qVD7T6F0

great book

>>19034091
at last, after years of searching
a gigachad post that actually deserves the image

I feel like being an adult is just realising that nothing good is ever going to happen to you and just somehow managing to be happy with working all the time while you get older fatter and uglier.

>>19034091
so after all these years... return to monke?

>>19032098
Cum

I think it’s time to call it quits…

>>19033701
To a certain degree (not completely), it’s just about not caring. You feel you have these bonds and so you do. If you don’t feel these bonds, you largely don’t have them.

I've managed to quit most of my bad habits except wasting inordinate time on this place. This one would be very difficult since this place serves as my primary social outlet

I am a repressing tranny

My will is paralyzed. I dont know what i want. I never make a choice with confidence. I dont have any spontanity left. Wtf do i do.

>>19032098
wait, so if vegeta has master morality and goku has slave morality, why is goku stronger than vegeta? checkmate nietzsche

>>19034544
Firstly. Leave 4chin. This place reinforces all that. Probably where you trained your head.

does anyone else not know what to do with their income? I pretty much save up everything after paying bills/mortgage & things like meals & transportation.
I barely buy anything hobbies related or any sort of decoration, it's not like I'm a cheap fuck, I do help out friends & family when they are in need, I just have no idea what to spend my money on when it comes to me, other than a hooker like once a week or two, the last thing I remember buying were some superlux headphones like 3 weeks ago that cost me 20 euros.
Whenever I try to buy anything I just think to myself if I need it or not, I have not bought a dish washer & a coffee machine because I do not deem them "necessities".
anyone else like this?

>>19034536
Better than a tranny that believes he should play pretend

>>19033727
Happy birthday anon.

>>19034633
>...she said, on-4chan-postingly

There is one reoccuring moment in my life wherein I know its meaning to be true, my goal to be clear, and my destiny capable of fulfilling: Whenever I wake up, and I immediately direct myself to the nearest bathroom. After that, despair.

>walking down the street
>cross a girl, she smiles
I did it bros
I just need to remember to smile back next time

>>19034805
Give her a wink

>>19032125
I am so happy I never began taking medications. You fucks are now dependent on them for everything. Being a reflexive contrarian has save my well being

>>19034694
Same, except I don't fuck hookers. Money's piling up. It's a good thing.

>>19032211
I miss Yahoo Answers

>>19032264
They're lazy sacks of shit who cope by insulting wagies

>>19034805
>walking down the street
>make eye contact with woman, lasts longer than one second
what do I do after that

>>19034091
b & r

>>19034893
you touch each other's grass, anon

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/leaded-gas-poison-invented-180961368/

science!

life is just managing suffering in different timeframes. knowledgeable life means managing suffering in this life and the next

how do I de-drm this

I am dating a twink and it feels more heterosexual than with modern woman. He absolutely mogs my ex gf

would anyone be interested if I ripped this? it's four dvds

>>19035029
audible just had a sale with every great courses class on sale for $10. if anyone wanted it, it would be a lot easier to just buy it.

>>19035004
lucky

>>19035029
People here are complete snobs about recorded literature.
Do you find them useful?

>used to be a sensitive but normal person
>family collapses due to drug abuse
>lose the ability to feel emotions for them
>3 years pass
>lose the ability to feel literally anything
>feel zero emotions during my day to day life
>randomly have dreams about trying to kill my father
>my emotions probably still exist but i have zero way to access them
i've tried to tell several people about this but no one seems to grasp just how fucked up it all is except me

My life has taken on a depressing rhythm and routine over the past few months since I split with my girlfriend. I work from home, Monday to Thursday. It's ostensibly a full time job but it takes me pretty much 2 hours a day. My manager loves me and wants to promote me, giving me a 100% raise. I go to the gym on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, during work hours. and eat healthily. I always get my 5 a day, as well as a protein shake, a scoop of creatine and 3 fried eggs. In the evenings, I go for long walks without my phone. It helps me decompress after a long day of not working.

On Fridays I do my shopping, and any other tasks I need to do. In the evening, I watch a film.

On Saturday, I go out drinking with my friends. I drink too much, and embarrass myself talking to girls, if I can even muster up the courage to talk to them, which is rare. It's all part of the ritual. I go home alone, drunk and frustrated, unless I get something off of tinder, which has happened a couple of times. The best feeling is the post-sex glow. It's 4am in the middle of summer, and you and a stranger you met that night have just finished having sex. It's beginning to get light outside. You're sharing a cigarette by the window. That, is the best feeling in the world and it stays with you for a full day.

When I wake up after a night out where I've failed to interact with girls, the wank is inevitable. It's an admission of failure, and while it does relieve my frustration, it does leave me feeling pretty miserable. I spend the rest of Sunday recovering from the hangover, and reconsidering what I want to do with my life. I've heard this described as the "Sunday Scaries".

I think I'm suffering from meaninglessness. The amount of work I put into my job has no bearing on what I get out of it, my boss loves me regardless. But it's so incredibly easy. I have no relationship to add meaning to my life. The only thing I actually get enjoyment from is the gym. The feeling when you walk out of the gym after spending 45 minutes lifting heavy things is the second best feeling in the world for about half an hour.

I have no idea how to make my life more meaningful.

Sometimes I honestly can't get out of the rage tunnel of how much I fucking hate my little brother. He won't have even done anything wrong, except his entirely life is a sad silent fuck-up with nothing to show for it. He's such a useless fucking imbecile, he does nothing and just latches on to comforts relentlessly, he never has anything interesting to say, all of his ambitions are just pale imitations of my own, he's constantly soothing his nerves with weed, nicotine, alcohol, and lexapro, and still has the temper of a fucking teenager brat. He's such a useless little fucking piece of shit that weighs me down that I almost can't stand it sometimes. It drives me up a fucking wall, and then eventually the feeling subsides and I just think "oh, he's just having a hard time like we all did in those years." Except he is just fucking hollow, he's just an angry hollow little bitch who whines and seeks comfort and has nothing to show for it, he'll be 23 soon and acts like he hasn't turned 18 yet. I internalize so god damn much trying to think that it's fine but the fucking air around him is poison. It's like you know he's living on borrowed time he can't afford or something, like he's a walking pit of emotional debt that can never be repaid. God fucking dammit I'm so annoyed it's just more shit I need to suffer

I recently came to hear roughly how much capital my father owns.
It's in the tens of millions, and not just cash it's real estate and a company that pays out tens of thousands of dollars each month. I always knew he was wealthy but this kind of shook me. He also said he does not believe in inheritance like most people do. He said he would rather lose it all than give it to his children for them to liquidate it and then just live off of it.

After hearing this I think I might just live near him and take over at least one of the companies. His words about inheritance spooked me. But on the other hand I will be financially independent the moment he passes and I will have so many options.

I wish he was less harsh with his views on inheritance but on the other hand I can understand how one would be peeved about their children just liquidating whatever you have build up.

>>19035202
This seems like a prudent move. Earn his trust, posture as if you intend to take over the family business, and when he passes then liquidate it! Not like it'll matter to him then.

>>19035273
Thing is I might prefer the income each month over just selling it all. Gives me something to do (manage property) which is by no means hard work. I also oddly still respect him after him being absent most of my life so if it really was his wish I would not sell it. Maybe if I use that money to then start up a new business which he wouldn't mind i don't think

It has made going to my regular wage job less attractive though, right now I'm just thinking I'll do this job for 2/3 years and then move over to where he lives.

>>19035202
>>19035273
Also speaking from my family's experience, self-made mini-empires like that tend to collapse after their central figure exits the picture. Unless there is already a corporate machine in place to handle transfers of power. My great grandfather was something of a real estate mogul, built summer homes for the Kennedys, produced whole neighborhoods. When he died unexpectedly without designated an heir, all it took was a few visits from lawyers and a whisk of a judge's pen for all those assets to go poof.

>>19035288
It's usually smarter not to just cash out, because then you get the "I won the lottery" syndrome and, not knowing how to handle so much money at once, you make bad decisions with it. But you'd have to get him to trust you enough first.

>>19035297
Yes that's why I want to move to where he is. Make sure something like that can't happen. But the real estate is just a fraction of what he has so the chance of me ending up empty handed is small.

>>19035308
I'm not retarded with money so I would never spend it all. If I do take the chance by starting a business with the money that's my concern. I don't know if I have what it takes to run a business.

>>19032098
How do I care about work/romance/entertainment/anything when climate change will destroy civilization within my lifetime? I imagine this is the sort of ennui an ancient Christian felt at learning about the End Times, with one major exception: climate change is real and imminent. It's like walking down a set of train tracks while a train charges at you.

>>19035334
Are we being raided by idiots who push the climate change agenda?
Completely unnatural posts whining about climate change all of a sudden.

>>19035347
I wish you were right and climate change was just an agenda, but it's not.

>>19035367
No one is disputing that climate changes. I'm just seeing weird posts like yours all over /lit/ now.
And if you want to be whitepilled, less people die due to weather related causes these days. You are now way less likely to die due to a hurricane or flood than at any point in history.

>>19035329
>I'm not retarded with money so I would never spend it all. If I do take the chance by starting a business with the money that's my concern. I don't know if I have what it takes to run a business.
There are more ways to squander a fortune than just spending it. Bad investments is one way, or shady finance advisors, accountants or lawyers . Having money is its own job, basically your job becomes managing it and the squad of legal and finance people you have to associate with. I happen to have a wealthy friend, and he is always on the phone with a lawyer or a financier. Tax season is hell for him because the richer you are the more complex it is to file them. Having a bunch of money plopped on your lap really forces you to take a crash course in finance and the legal system.

>>19035004
What the fuck is wrong with this generation

>>19035004
Many such cases!
>>19035447
W*men are awful.

>>19035447
Feminine men are often more feminine than actual women

>>19035167
It's okay anon, I understand. I'm totally numbed. The only strong emotions I ever feel now are anger and bitterness. I don't feel close to anyone, and it always surprises me when people express sentiment for me. I just don't know how to receive or return the feeling. I basically just kind of mimic the behaviour as best I can.
Sometimes I can realize that I actually did feel something years after the experience. I don't know that i'm feeling anything as i'm feeling it, if that makes any sense. It's really odd

>>19035169
I don't understand how someone can have sex with a total stranger. Sex is something so intimate and deep. How yo can share that with someone you will never know is beyond me

>>19035199
You're his older brother. Why don't you try to fucking help him instead of rage blogging on /lit/

>>19035447
women

>>19035334
You should just wallow in hopeless misery for the rest of your life

>>19035455
>>19035460
>>19035486
I dont talk to women so i wouldn't know. Are they really that bad?

>>19035495
Not an option. I am trying small things like stopping meat consumption and buying an electric car to replace my gasoline one, but that's not enough.

>>19035500
They aren't bad, but I stand by my statement here >>19035460. I'll admit I've never seen a femboy irl though, perhaps the reality is different from the images.

>>19035334
How do you know climate change doesn't lead to the Biblical End Times?

>>19035508
>climate change hysteric
>gay

>>19035508
>climate change hysteric
>a fag
Whats the correlation here bros

Sometimes I think about how the invention of firearms has taken out whatever grain of nobility there is in mortal combat. To kill anyone with a gun is always the equivalent of stabbing them in the back, it is inherently cowardly. As the invention of firearms really had one purpose in mind. It wasn't to make warfare more efficient, because the earliest firearms were woefully clumsy, error-prone, and barely even lethal, little more than elaborate noisemakers and firebreathers that unnerved the enemy and perhaps hit someone in the general vicinity of the gun's cone of fire with scraps of metal. No, the intended purpose of firearms is to escape the visceral and intense experience of melee combat, the strange sort of intimacy it entails in which the foe you are in the process of slaying bleeds on you, his soulful, fearful, enraged eyes gazing into yours, his even his breath palpable and his screams and agonies directly in your ears. The purpose of guns is to put the ugliness of the business of killing in war a comfortable distance away where one can dissociate with it. In actual melee combat, it comes down to a battle of skill and willpower and earnest capability. (Of course this is not always true, since as long as wars have been fought with melee weapons, forces have sought to abstract and diminish the actual one-on-one dueling aspect of combat. The Romans perfected a system where they would only expose a given rank of legionaries to frontline combat before signaling them to shift to the left, do an about face, and retreat to the back of the column so that the next rank in the file can step up. This ensured that the Legions were continually refreshed on the frontline and only exposed to combat briefly, whereas the enemy was continually fighting and growing exhausted. Furthermore, melee combat was more often than not a pushing contest between masses of troops locking shields and thrusting blindly at the enemy behind it.)

Still, I wonder if the world would be a better, less violent place if ballistic weaponry were never invented. Because to kill someone with a melee weapon up close and person requires greater fearlessness and more risk.

Inside you there are two gays.
A homofascist top or a onions-guzzling faggy bottom.
Which way western gay?

>>19035004
Protip. Never date femme twinks. Use them only for sex. They're worse than women because the testosterone gives them more of a bite. Only date bro-twinks.

>>19034633
probably since ive been here for 15 years now.

>>19035517
>>19035526
>gay
Hey, I love women! I'm just saying they are some attractive femboys too.

>climate change hysteric
If you are not hysterical about it you are in denial

>>19035544
I've come to appreciate 4chan more the longer I'm here.
I had plans to stop using it at first but now I think it's one of the few places on the internet worth anything. Been here for around 11 years myself

>>19035547
Stop looking at models anon, they're spooking you out. I already told you weather related deaths are at an all time low

>>19035536
Firearms are the great equalizer. I have a measure of proportionate ability in my own security and personal autonomy due to my posession of and competency with firearms

>Twinks
Based.
>Femboys
Cringe.

>>19035547
Guys really, why do climate change hysteria, progressive politics, and faggotry manifest in the same people? What is the correlation??

>>19035568
>Guys really, why does aversion towards climate change hysteria, progressive politics, and faggotry manifest in the same people? What is the correlation??

ftfw

>>19035538

>>19035484
All he gets is help. He's constantly being helped, and he just nourishes himself on right wing rage and insular feelings of superiority and feeling like the whole world is garbage even though he can barely wipe his own ass. In truth, I'm the one who's there for him more than anyone else, so when my tank is finally empty, guess what, that little piece of me he's scrounging on to get by isn't there and it pushes me into actual rage. All the favorite things in his life and creative passions are from me, certain games or music, everything, it's like he just downloads all the good stuff and never adds any of his own, he has his shitty little crypto mining rig and is into investments, all he cares about is sustaining his own comfort. That's the thing, he's just a fucking vampire, he takes and takes and gives nothing, not even an interesting perspective because he has so much impotent aggression that interacting with him is like walking on a tightrope, he is just pure fucking vampire NEET and it's so god damn exhausting. I constantly want him to become a real person and just enjoy his life but he just comes back to drain energy and cling to old comforts that are going to get his ass dropped out of school before he knows it.

>>19035538
A homofascist faggy bottom

>>19035557
True, though I find something profane about high cap and/or automatic weapons. There is nothing equal about the power to execute dozens of people at the squeeze of a trigger. Even a bow and arrow is more honorable, as it requires genuine skill to use effectively. English longbowmen for instance required years of training and tremendous upper body strength to wield the weapon effectively. You really don't even need to know how to aim with an automatic weapon with sufficient magazine capacity.

As an aside, I think there is a certain remnant of "honorable" gunfighting encapsulated by the cowboy western mythos and dueling. A six shooter means that one must know how to aim and take one's shots and, when the need to reload arises, control one's nerves enough to do so without dropping the bullets or the gun or losing one's focus and situational awareness of the actions of the enemy.

>>19035568
>People are like this and I believe it because I saw it on 4chan /wwoym/
Have you ever met people in your life

>>19035629
Might be because he's on 4 types of drugs.
If he doesn't get that under control you can do/say whatever you want, he will not come out of his comfort haze.

>>19035029
Upload them to youtube or something and drop the link.

>>19035135
Haven't watched them yet but the course is apparently worth $300 from their website. It's enough to warrant my curiosity

>>19035629
Enabling a person isn't help

>>19035199
As someone who also has little brother problems, take it from me. Start being nice and supporting to him immediately or you'll regret it. The cruelty I showed my younger brother when we were both kids still haunts me to this day.

He doesn't know what he's doing and is coping with it poorly. He's acting out because he has problems he doesn't know how to deal with. You're being ignorant by not trying to influence him for the better. Some people are beyond saving, but if you don't make a sincere effort to get his back, what hope is there for him?

>>19034880
Nobody takes pills, you're mainstream now son

>>19035636
I take my friends to the shooting range occasionally. I'm the only person who has ever introduced them to shooting. They're actually a hazard to be around without very careful guidance. It takes them multiple trips just to get comfortable loading, chambering, and disarming the firearm. They certainly need many more trips before they can actually hit targets.
I'm reminded of Elliot Rodgers. His rampage was a joke. He thought guns were just a magical wand where you point and shoot and people just die. Didn't he miss almost every shot? Did he even manage to kill anyone? Or how about Randy Stair. That guy missed point blank with a shotgun.
I'm not gonna guess your political disposition but anti gun liberals have thathat fantasy view of firearms. That you get an ar15 and can magically just slaughter people. It really takes training and experience. Nobody can just pick up a gun and become a killing machine. I often worry about civil war or some kind of major conflict because I know actually trained swat teams or military deployments could easily take on a hobbyist like me.
There is a degree of equalization, but its not a level playing field

I’m visiting my parents for a while and all I’ve done is hole up in my room and play video games like I’m 15.

>>19035637
Yes I have. I live in a very progressive area. I was very interested in politics and use to go to campus clubs and debates. Even in just meeting people with passing interests in politics, it is my experience that faggotry, climate change hysterics, and progressivism generally correlate in people.

>>19035559
What’s the difference?

>>19035672

>>19035476
Honestly sex with strangers feels far better than sex with my girlfriend ever did. With someone new it's a rapid escalation from complete stranger to intimate partner. It's exhilarating to me.

With the same partner it can become almost dull after a while.

>>19035735
Twinkle are just young ottermode guys, femboys are naturally feminine dudes that make an effort to make themselves even more feminine by shaving their entire body, wearing knee high stripped stockings and covering their faces with masks.

>>19035715
You're not exactly wrong. Although there are certain levels of natural competence when it comes to guns. I've been to the shooting range a few times, and the first time I picked up a gun I knew exactly what to do with it after 5 minutes of instruction. And I found it quite easy to aim. Even so, it's far easier to kill someone with a gun than without one, Elliot Rodger, being the scrawny boy that he was, wouldn't have barely gotten any kills without one. (Though he did stab his roommates to death, this was literally stabbing them in the back.) It's much harder to run away from someone with a gun as they can still kill you while running.
Neither of these people were natural born killers or had a bent for soldiering. If you put a sword in their hands they would have been even more incompetent. Although the mechanical complexity of a gun is much greater than a simple swinging or thrusting melee weapon, you can train someone up much faster with a gun than a sword.

Consider the Las Vegas shooter. He would not have been able to kill that many people so far away without guns. No matter the circumstance. Or the Sandy Hook shooter, he had minimal training, he wasn't some gunsmith with deep technical knowlege of ballistics.

Any tool requires some training to use effectively. If you were to thrust a rifle into some unfamiliar hands in that moment they would probably be less dangerous than someone who you gave a spear, because even a chimp can instinctively put together the concept of stabbing someone with the pointy end.

Btw not that it's that relevant that I am pro-gun in the sense that I am pro self-defense. I just don't think guns have made anything better. They are a necessary evil because they are the standard personal means of delivering violence

>>19035876
Well I guess we've both changed our positions, if only slightly. The guns don't equalize us as much as I earlier suggested. And they aren't as dishonorable as you earlier suggested. If only slightly.

If you do not drink your girlfriend’s saliva or spit or drool, then you are a homosexual. If you do not drink your girlfriend’s sweat, then you are a homosexual. If you do not drink her urine, then you are a homosexual. If you do not drink her various pudendal (that is, vaginal) fluids, then you are a homosexual. If you, however, interact with anything regarding excrement then you are incorrigibly homosexual and must be taken outside and shot. It must be noted, however, that these secretions must be at body temperature: only a homosexual would consume cold saliva. Furthermore, they must be supped directly from the source: to drink even warm saliva from a glass is to engage in homoerotic behavior.

I am very, very scared of conflict. debilitatingly so, it ruins my relationships.

>>19035536
according to EU2 the iranians refused to modernize their army once the turks were getting muskets for theirs, for precisely this reason. pretty bad ass if true

>>19035768
Less than the majority

>>19035730
I'm a fag and I'm not progressive with climate change hysterics so where is your god now

BAM is kind of an interesting book and BAP is kind of an interesting person, but his legions of devout reactionary dude bros are not and the actualization of his movement seems to me a bigger joke than the same of the philosophers he despises so much. Call me crazy but nudist Joe Rohan culture is not the solution to modernity.

>>19034516
same, there's just no IRL surrogate for it unless your an academic or something similar

>>19035972
She thought it was weird when I wanted to do that

>>19032264
He could’ve wished for anything but became a wagecuck, Shinji-kun you confuse me

>>19032264
I've been a NEET before and I desperately want to go back to it. I don't understand people like you. Can you not keep yourself busy? Get a schedule, start listing down activities, stick to that schedule. Simple as. You can do all of the things you'd like to do with your life because you have time. If only I could back. I hate office work so much.

How do I get into a literary circle without having a uni degree?

>>19036282
state-mandated trans gfs when

>>19036359
I don't know, but that one's mine, she's my wife

>>19035538
For me, it's onions-guzzling faggy bottom

>>19036359
Wait thats a tranny?

>>19036282
you could check with a library, I know they have stuff like that sometimes in my country (Sweden)

I was meditating and it turned into a dream about how I didn’t meet the paperwork requirements to behead myself.

>>19036449
that's another day with your head on I guess

>>19036434
She's a trans pornstar, yes, and also my wife.

>>19036434
Clearly a man, wtf man?

>>19036441
Good idea, but my town's library is only open for like two hours twice a week. So that I doubt.

>>19032264
>Time feels fleeting. Everything feels mundane and almost pointless.
It's like that whether a wagie or a neet

>>19036522
lmao look at this butters is insecure
Ella mogs you in every way

what are your favourite film (or tv show) portrayals of writers? real or fictional doesn't matter

Trying to work right now and I feel like just getting on a bus and leaving, becoming homeless somewhere and telling nobody where I went

>>19036549
Whatever you say trooner

>>19032098
I want to write a bunch of short texts, more or less the length of the in-game books in the elder scrolls games. But I can't start. I'm always the type of person who can only write only 1-2 sentences or 3000 words on a given topic, with little in the way of a 400 word interlude that doesn't feel like 2 sentences stretched out to infinity or like an extract from 3000 words of rambling.

I don’t want to get fit. I just want to get very skinny.

>>19036625
same

>>19036625
Well getting wiry is a nice midway

>>19036116
do what?
which one?
all of it?
did you say, "bitch we're gonna do it anyway"?
or did you pussy out?

>>19036610
you're just butthurt because men are better than women at EVERYTHING

>>19036591
probably johnny depp as hunter thompson

>>19036684

>>19036676
I asked her to tie mme down, spit in my mouth, piss her panties and then tape them into my mouth. i then asked her to sodomize, abuse my nipples, and then walk me aroubd the house on a leash and collar.
She declined

What the fuck happened to this thread? I was only gone for like three hours Jesus

Anyone else notice the bizarre fetishization for farming and farm life?

>>19036792
I started posting

I want to be a professional hunter.

>>19036852
Actually, I have so many things I want to do, I don’t know how to make sense of it.

>>19036282
>>19036684
So fucking hot

>>19032264
Maybe I'm different but I've been NEET since finishing my Master's in 2014. I couldn't fucking wait to be done. Now I've been enjoying life. Work is fun snd interesting. In my spare time I play vidya, write, read, get high/drunk as fuck I'm having a blast counting down the years to the void.

>>19036684
Based Ella enjoyer...

>>19036610
I am a gay cis female and I would love to fuck her. Fuck out of my thread, retard

My only fixed monthly expense is my student loan and I STILL can’t work up the courage to just quit my job.

Recently I came to a crossroads in my life. My career took a turn for the better and it really just came down to luck.
But somewhere out there, in our infinite universe, there's a me that didn't get the job. And he knows I exist, that I "stole" this luck from him.
I wonder if he hates me. I just want to meet him and apologize. Give him a hug and let him know it will be okay.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OX0OARBqBp0

>>19037118
>gay
>female
Pick one

Hilarious as it is, I've tried finding meaningful friendship all my life. I used to get grounded because I always tried to hang out with a kid from my neighborhood only to have him drop me for other people once we grew older. I used to count on that one guy from my class up until the time he decided to start making fun of me once we entered seventh grade for absolutely no reason. In high school I thought I had found some but I guess because of the fact I lived in another town, the thing just wasn't meant to be. And once we graduated, they never really even bothered calling me and so on. And as I grew older I just found more and more failures. I've always gave it my all and were left hanging. Does true friendship exist at all? The one from the stories, the blood oath one, the bromance one if you want. When you know you can count on the person about absolutely everything.

And it is silly that in the recent years I've went as far as telling people who I really like how much I care about them and like them. They didn't care one bit or didn't want to comprehend what I was saying. Strange life. I am exhausted. The lack of such relationship in my life makes me miserable. I can ignore it while I am working or while I am wasting time on my phone but I cannot do it during the most private parts of my day to day life.

I’ve realized that I’m riddled with anxiety 24/7 of exactly the sort that Martin Heidegger talks about.

>>19036591
The writer in Resnais' Providence. I am a bit of a sucker for the bitter old writer trope though.

why is the word diarrhea so funny?

>>19037252
It's not hilarious. I catch your drift. I'm at the other end of the spectrum, being totally unable to connect with other people when it's about forming something deeper than a superficial relationship. I'm not even willing to invest any of my time in a friend anymore because I know it won't work for me. I have those few junkie friends who don't really care about me and that's all I've got. We're constantly pretending we're best friends even though we're all polar opposites of each other and judge each other constantly, happy memories long gone.
The only true friends I ever had were my girlfriends and they all eventually left. I think it's not even a thing of our time, I'm pretty sure philosophers from 2000 years ago have been through the same stages as us. It's a human thing. Everyone can hear the buzzing, the thing that reminds you you are alone since your birth and always will be. You may believe it's forever away when you meet someone exceptional, but it always come back at some point.
Fuck the buzzing, fuck loneliness, fuck being a social species with asocial tendencies.

I just want to get really good at writing fiction, but I have no idea how to improve. There’s no method for this like there is for sports or something.

>>19037728
>There’s no method for this like there is for sports or something.
yes there is it's called 'practice'

>>19037751
But you’re wrong. In fact, you can easily practice bad habits and never make any progress.

>>19037728
im not a writer myself but I believe you need feedback from multiple readers to really improve

I will not get a STEM degree. I will not work.

>>19037546
i find the french word "Peluche" to be funny

My friend got a job offer at the NSA. He's going to get a 3-year training course in hacking and cryptography. I am kinda jealous because he didn't really accomplish much more at college than I did, and it's more a result of getting an internship right after high school and he did well so he came back and finally got the offer. But more than envy, I feel empathy with him for just spending your college years dicking around and dropping multiple classes. I know it worked out for him in the end, but it's a kind of bitter feeling no matter what

What job should I do?

>>19037887
Just find something you don't hate, that's the best you can hope for in this cursed fucking world.

I'm worse than Oblomov because at least he had a good heart. I'm just a bitter, miserable person who has nothing or no one left to blame but himself. Woe is me! I'll go on.

I know that I am a fool, and for that reason it is impossible for me to love myself. this is the source of all my problems

>>19037887
Community organizing
We need to work less. Do only what we need to, and want to.
As opposed to what *they* want us to do

>>19037901
I second this. If there’s nothing noble that you can call a vocation then the second best thing is to make the most of what you got, and what you got is survival. Survive in a way that isn’t miserable.

The victory of the 13 Colonies in the American Revolution and its consequences has been a disaster for Western Civilization.

Separation from the mother country is the ill ailing America.

>Just find something you don't hate, that's the best you can hope for in this cursed fucking world.

>I second this. If there’s nothing noble that you can call a vocation then the second best thing is to make the most of what you got, and what you got is survival. Survive in a way that isn’t miserable.

>>19037887
See what I mean? A life of misery getting by (like I’ve just been doing) or trying to do something about it.
I don’t know you anon. I just hope you can find joy in the risk of helping end the tormentors rule.

>>19037979
Bullshit.

>>19037988
>>19037995

Butterfly, what are your genuine opinions? Who's the person behind the trip, I'm genuinely curious, from the perspective of someone loosely familiar with the (dubiously important) story.
I'll start: I'm 24, and fucked up on the head, and I've been lurking/posting /lit/ since maybe 2019 or so.

>>19037995
Bullshit because?

>>19038037
she sometimes purposely doesn't acknowledge the (You)s she gets to maintain the mystery

>>19038088
Not even a mystery, really just annoying and tiresome.
Or, maybe, you're her, and the dubs have spoken. Either way, I'm not simping, I'm just curious about the woman (female) behind the trip, specifically because I'm so tempted to write it off, and embrace a sort of lite misogyny.

>>19037853
>and it's more a result of getting an internship right after high school and he did well
these seemingly minute opportunities are essential for success in stem fields. someone might have failed to tell you that a lot of the value you gain in college is by keeping an ear to the overachievers and learning how to maximize career opportunities. there's still time, anon, i know older people than you who are experimenting and engaging in fruitful self-optimizations.

>>19037934
fool ->? can't love yourself? that's surprising. are there other fools that love themselves? sure there are, I'm a fool and I love myself (sometimes)! self-love isn't free, and sometimes it isn't accessible, but i don't agree with your core premise there.

>>19037787
find your own path, but remember to find people you trust and sample their advices and minds.

>>19038118
>i know older people than you who are experimenting and engaging in fruitful self-optimizations.
How do I do it?

>>19034589
This.

>>19038195
i don't know you, anon. also, many older people have stagnated and given up on ambition. i can't answer your question, but i simply wanted to give hope that you can affect the course of your life.

if that's not helpful, here: some people in their late 20s start PhDs. some people in stem jobs hop and hop every few years to land a high-paying "presitgious" one. some people start their own companies. some are climbing the normal ladders. and others, well, are fine where they are, but typically people who post here aren't of the class that are comfortable with their own lives, so i made an assumption.

>>19038221
Yeah that's true. It seems like the important point is motivation. Some days I'm motivated to really improve and I get some work done, and other days I just want to die. It's difficult, I don't know if I can really succeed like this

I get sad whenever i think about all the cute german girls that were raped by russian mongrels during the fall of Berlin :(

>>19038245
>I get sad whenever i think about all the cute german girls that were raped by russian mongrels during the fall of Berlin :(
Just wait for the fall of France. Kek

>>19038255
French girls don't seem to have any innocence about them. They seem so jaded

>>19038260
>French girls don't seem to have any innocence about them. They seem so jaded
Man, didn't the nazis had literal breeding farms or something like that?

>>19038044
You post this >>19037979 ? You go first.

>>19038037
I give my genuine opinions most of the time. The jokes are pretty transparent.
>>19038102
Why? I’m easily ignored for having a moniker. If I felt the same about you I could do nothing. And so I see the death threats and sexual harassment. Does anyone report them for trolling? Pbff.

This game fucking sucks.

What if the trick to social interaction is just minimizing the amount of thought you do in your head and just spitting out whatever comes to mind? Maybe we're all just overthinking things

>>19038245
It's best not to think about all the rape that happened between 1935 and 1945

>>19038352
you ignored my bait for you >>19034728

>>19038399
Must have been the neck doily

>>19038375
That only works if you're a normie and your head has been a sieve for the last 20 years and you've collected all the correct normie junk you're supposed to know/say/think/act out while letting the rest flow through and over you

Have you never noticed how normies are capable of weird things like having a whole persona built up on "I care about people, I'm a good person, I help the downtrodden" and simultaneously committing horrific acts of callousness and cruelty against their own friends, family, and people suffering outside their immediate circle? That's not hypocrisy, hypocrisy implies something conceptual and cognitive. Normies have no concepts and no cognition, they just activate different "profiles" or "personas" based on social-emotional context.

When the context is Big Party, Time To Impress Peers and Fit In, they will start talking about how they'd die for anyone downtrodden. When the context is something else, they revert to brute animalistic callousness, because they've never actually integrated kindness into their base self, which would have required overwriting their animal callousness or synthesizing the two in some creative way. But again the trick to understanding the normie is to realize this isn't intentional, it's not cognitive, it's instinct. The normie really does believe he is a good person when he's at the party barking about it. He doesn't perceive a contradiction between that and being an animal later.

That is the secret to their natural "flow." It's different from the flow of someone who is confident (for cognitive reasons, like knowledge that they are charismatic or high value and can just relax) or someone who doesn't care (for cognitive reasons, like rejection of society). To say the "trick" of social interaction is to go with the flow like a normie, is like saying the trick to surviving in the desert is to become a cactus.

>>19038235
>Some days I'm motivated to really improve and I get some work done, and other days I just want to die. It's difficult, I don't know if I can really succeed like this

Damn I feel you. I feel like I change my mind fifteen times a week. One day I'm set on my goals and then the next I decide that they're fruitless and decide to pursue something else. Then other days I want to do nothing and just live in a van by a beach somewhere. My indecision is exhausting.

>>19038352
I'm actually not quite certain; I thought I had a reason, but upon examination, it's not as simple as it may have first appeared.
Maybe it's the very act of using a trip, when the vast, *vast* majority of posters do not that seems almost arrogant in its presumption that whatever the tripposter has to say *necessitates* an established identity.

Or, maybe it has to do with this the applique of an identity onto the way another person types, and how we all impress our beliefs of who we are talking to onto that person, regardless of whether or not they're accurate.

I will admit that a small portion of my skepticism into your persona has to do with a bitter (non-insignificant) portion of myself, which has been growing in recent years, that may resemble a misogyny that's mostly just a schizoid rejection of other people, women especially due to past experiences (with BPD whores).

So that being said, why use the trip if you're not some flagrant narcissist in need of attention (which I am not saying you are, only that if you were it would align with intentionally assigning yourself an identity on an anonymous image board).

All this being said, I am, self admittedly, mentally ill, and I have a number of insidious delusions which I'm only partially aware of at any given time.

>>19038375
>>19038410

Social interaction, in and of itself, isn't very complicated; the fundamentals of it are actually very easy. That being said, like all things, the trick is in mastering something.

Surface and mid-level interactions are easy enough, and you can get (most) people to like you just by mechanically behaving right: eye contact, smiling, paying (cursory) attention to others, and laughing along with their jokes. Beyond this is having a surface level understanding of the current, cultural zeitgeist (sports, age-group unique events/tv shows, humor, etc.) It's especially easy if you share an environment day after day with said person, as that makes conversation very easy.

All this being said, whatever comes beyond this I haven't mastered, or even become close to competent at approaching. It's something I apparently knew as a kid, but somewhere during or after puberty, I seem to have forgotten it, and it's tied hand in hand with the personality disorder I believe that I possess.

Whatever that deeper thing is, is what's required for making lasting friendships the way normies do, and, what is key to effectively re-becoming a normie in the way of 'making it' that most denizens here aspire to.

Granted, at this point I think it's beyond me, unless the answer lies in years and years of therapy.

>>19038410
Yeah, I mean it's no secret that socializing involves a lot of bullshit and it's mostly a self-serving thing. But I think the point is to just cope with it and do it anyways at least to the extent you feel like doing it. You can also become a hermit if you want, there's no shame in that, but if you're going to socialize it's best to know what's expected of you. I think us social maladjusts fuck it up so often because we don't actually get what's the right way to go about it and overthink stuff all the time. Basically, if it takes effort to think of something to say in a situation, just don't say anything, bring something else up, or look at your phone.

>>19038410

This is basically true, civilization has been a long game of higher functioning humans distancing themselves from the common man. And then various attempts at reconciliation, "equality", redemption, and so on. The early field of psychology has made headway in discovery the inner depravity of the mass spirit. And now that we all know, the aristocratic urge is bound to return since the common nature cannot sustain itself without eventually dying. Eventually the sun will burn out. The rabble need their masters. The alternative is stagnation and death

>>19038413
>I am, self admittedly, mentally ill
Sorry to hear. If we ever get into any spats, know it isn’t personal. Even the death threats I shrug off as bluster most the time. But I trade insults because that’s how anonymous wants to play. You adopt their stance when you take their name until otherwise specified.
Back in the day, lit was full of trip users. I adopted the name to fit in. I felt better for it. Still anonymous, enough, but I wasn’t a vile creature who could get away with any kind of verbal abuse. I had to watch it. Not a narcissist, but I’m not chasing ego death either.

Hey, try not to internalize hatred. It can only hurt you.

I hate women

>>19038439

The extra bit is probably just trying to initiate friendships or getting people to initiate friendship with you. Then maintaining them. If people are distanced, then you may be mismatched in terms of age, social status, and personal qualities

>>19035169
>When I wake up after a night out where I've failed to interact with girls, the wank is inevitable. It's an admission of failure, and while it does relieve my frustration, it does leave me feeling pretty miserable. I spend the rest of Sunday recovering from the hangover, and reconsidering what I want to do with my life. I've heard this described as the "Sunday Scaries".
>I think I'm suffering from meaninglessness. The amount of work I put into my job has no bearing on what I get out of it, my boss loves me regardless. But it's so incredibly easy. I have no relationship to add meaning to my life. The only thing I actually get enjoyment from is the gym. The feeling when you walk out of the gym after spending 45 minutes lifting heavy things is the second best feeling in the world for about half an hour.
>I have no idea how to make my life more meaningful.
add me on discord cuck

>>19038407
this is on sale right now on verso's website, thought you might be interested in it

How much and how often does one have to read in order to be considered a “voracious reader”?

in amethystine twi-lights lethe was Lit, forgetful ruby-eyed inhabitants, with languor visions-reddened-dolorous, in Lethe sat they blind, without remembrance, nor semblance? faint, perhaps a quintessence remains; a dream of tyre and tarshish Old.

mirage or echo? phantasmagoric bells
resound with knells, the specters sing in tune, delusive ghost processions dirge the Font, forgetful river linger over Not, engulf the whole of me with deluges of ancient sleep, with ancient tiredness, leviathan I seek not, lethean divinity I seek thee, dissolve me, unloose the silver cord forevermore.

>>19038688
pretty

holy shit audible just launched one of the dankest sales i've seen.

bitches who like Jane Austen are always crazy

source: Google.com

first step of the art party -
search for and introduce yourself to the Asians and Anglos.
then have a good time.

>>19032098
I think I'll write a novelette length (perhaps more) story of a witch and a young girl falling in love.

When people ask me what I want to do with my life, I tell them I don't know when the truth is I want to be a writer. The thought of telling them the truth feels somehow shameful or embarrassing. I've tried to just get a normal job and have normal aspirations but doing so only brought on suicidal thoughts.

Recently, I've discovered that my grandparents on both sides of my family have had similar aspirations, which is strange since neither of my parents ever seemed to care about writing. This has only increased my suffering. I feel as though I'm destined to be a writer and that going off that path to have a comfortable career and life is not only giving up on a dream, but also an affront to some ancestral decree.

Increasing my suffering even more is the full knowledge that I am likely living in the last era of authors. Technology is developing so quickly and entertainment is so important in our society that I suspect all art forms are going to become more and more integrated with one another until alone any one of them are meaningless and the new holism of that expression will be done by some weird conglomerate of human will and AI. Even if I wanted to give up and just have kids there would be no hope of them ever taking up the reigns.

Worst of all I'm not even a very good writer, I'm at most a self-aware hack. This only means I must get better, but the path from hack to mediocrity could well take a life time and I can feel the malignant interval before me and my withering in it.

i just want to find another completely isolated anon and snuggle them

>>19035552
Well yeah it has some value.
But also constant negative feedback or something.

Oh god how the fuck does linkedin know so many people I know personally, I never made a social media
I'm downright creeped out

I have made a significant spiritual advancement. To date, I would spend many hours daydreaming while going through the day's responsibilities. I would imagine myself being interviewed by a sceptical Joe Rogan. But now, after introducing scheduled periods of critical reflection, I am able to imagine myself as Joe Rogan interviewing the World. And an inquisitive, curious Joe Rogan at that!

>>19039410
Afaik it's from people you know volunteering your email to them. I have two possible contacts on it, and I think they are the only two people whose newsletter I ever subscribed to. I know them both, but it's not the kind of relationship you could link any other way electronically. Zero of my other jobs/friends/family/other contacts have ever shown, so I presume it's because they submitted their mailing list in some form.

>>19033975
I think his post addresses this - the increased military presence was probably 1/10 of the extreme activity the world noticed in December. There wasn't any mention in the report or his post that Wuhan was a ghost town, and why would it be? When lockdowns came into effect they couldn't leave their houses, nobody was evacuating. My guess is that it was actually full of people for the games, which were held normally but under the subtle backdrop of this increased activity which makes sense only now that we realize the damning data that accompanies it.
There were certainly no outright lockdowns because once those were enacted it became obvious. People were probably moving around freely and even the city's doctors obviously didn't even know what was going on. If they did, they definitely wouldn't be letting in covid patients like normal ones and releasing them with the rest of the populace...
Nobody would monitor these small signs at the time, or ever if it hadn't been for these reports. Seems clear CCP was trying to handle it internally without revealing anything to the public to reduce alarm, hence the lack of noticeable preventative measures. It's only when you add up all these factors that you get the full truth. Your premise seems to be that the outbreak and lockdowns/CCP extreme measures began around this time. They did not.

>>19037518
what kind does he talk about?

>>19037118
yes sweaty.. we know lesbians aren't real.. ;)

>>19032098

I have a constant lactation fetish due to gaslighting and toxic behavior from my mother and because I never had a maternal/older sister figure in life who would love me platonically and make me into a better person.

>>19038688
Nice.

>>19033727
Happy Birthday! I will pray for you today.

How to get over about the feels of rage, desperation, frustration caused by the at least third girl in a yearspan who after showing interest started ignoring the hell out of me? I think I shall return to a new psychologist again thanks to w*men and how they destroy my feeling of self-worth

Its my birthday today and i've started it by visiting dentist due to severe pain. Maybe God is trying to say something.

Just got back from the cardiologist and god I want to fuck my doctor so bad. He's young and completely my type. Too bad I'm fat

interactions with high IQ people is odd because one assumes them to be more curious than an average or dumb person but they rarely are and when they are the space which they explore is bounded and safe (by the standards of mainstream). its scary to know that the world is largely run by people who have the intellectual capacity to absorb and execute the exact orders of their age since they 'fit' so well to what it demands.

If our ancestors were nomads and roamed freely from place to place, and even settled in foreign lands to offer services and obtain certain aspects of life, why should we not do the same? Why are we the only historical people that should feel ourselves bound not by necessity but by affinity to our national, ethnic, linguistic, or religious borders despite choice? Is the nationalist myth that strong?

>>19040496
vast majority of people migrate between countries nowadays. the middle class is heavily bound to the nation state since it subsidizes their existence

My all time favorite story is a manga. Should I stop writing novels and start drawing manga? I’m a decent artist, but I’m American.

>>19038439
I think to be friends properly you have to be able to be vulnerable. letting people know how you actually feel about things. now as for knowing when to do that so it is natural- I can't really give you any advice. But I believe this is a thing

>>19040405
Damn, what a way to start the day.

>>19040491
The system wants well trained midwits

>>19040496
Because it’s a prison camp with paternalistic elites that need your tribute to maintain their unnatural lifestyle.

>>19040507
No, you boob.

Creative people need time to sit around and do nothing.
Creative people need to disappear for 2 weeks without contacting anyone from their circle.
Creative people need to act offended when asked what they were doing for 2 weeks.
Creative people are known under a different name in a country you heard about once during history class.
Creative people need to pay in cash.
Creative people don't need to explain where they got the money from.
Creative people need to be exempt from trespassing charges and simply be allowed to explore certain government institutions.
Creative people have never seen that car before, neither driven it.
Creative people would really appreciate it if you would stop already.
Creative people are going to the store to buy a vanilla Coke, don't wait for them.

I think what I’m going to do is quit the job, and just spend sometime writing a little bit, getting in better shape, just existing. I know I’ll be throwing away a good, “safe” career but I don’t care.

>>19040738
>he asked, while posting on an anime-themed website.
Of course, dummy.
Go ahead, do your own thing.

>>19040459
should have seen a dietician

>>19038358
Betrayal! Betrayed me!

>>19041112
>my dad was a meanie so nation states are bad

>>19041239
>Creative people are known under a different name in a country you heard about once during history class.
What

>>19041286
true

Discovering that lolicon bleach doujin as a 11 years old was the biggest mistake of my life.

>>19041292
Yeah

>>19041458
same but taimanin at age 9

Next thread.
>>19041525
>>19041525

Should the janimetors allow such heresy