/lit/ - Literature

>>18522397
Start licking her earlobe.

>>18522397
Waking up

>>18522397
There is a saying in my country: "Quando a esmola é muita, o santo desconfia."

>>18522397
"No... uhhh no I'm, I'm reading..." I glance down at my novel and fold it shut for a second to see. "Uhhh c-Call of the Crocodile..."
"..oh! What's that, I've never heard of it?"
"yeah it's kind of a meme book on.... Hmmm this website.... Yeah the book isn't very... V-very good..."
"Oh...."
".....y-yeah."
"......"

>>18522397
Stop fucking spying on me bitch

>>18522416
>be dreaming about qt at deli for half a semester
>finally muster up courage to speak to her
>stutters through entire opener
>left without even buying a sandwich
life is not meant to be enjoyable for all

Jizz on her like a tide hitting a cliff

>>18522397
Yeah, its pretty reddit, isnt it?

>>18522457
>what do you mean?

>>18522439
Practice makes perfect anon. The fact you took action at all implies there's hope for you yet.
>Life is not meant to be enjoyable for all
We are refined in suffering

>>18522410


HAHA.

IS «ESMOLA» BEING USED THERE IN THE SENSE OF «FLATTERY»/«OBSEQUIOUSNESS»?

>>18522416
Too real, delet

>>18522464
Like reddit, the website, you know. Pretty cringe, if you ask me.

>>18522469
TELL ME ABOUT CUMGENIUS
WHY DOES HE WEAR THE CAPS LOCK?

>>18522469
Not exactly, it can be. It literally means 'money donation'.

>>18522397
I don't care what you like. A virtuous action is virtuous by itself.

>>18522397
>Not really, there's a Burger King coupon wedged inside, I'm reading the terms and conditions in full

>>18522397
is this charlotte stokely?

>>18522492

>>18522397
start reciting Stoicism, Skepticism, and the the Unhappy Consciousness until she backs off

Haha y-yes it is, Are you an archeologist by chance?

>>18522397
Hopefully she doesn't want you to stab her lover while they are having sex, and proceed to make love to her drenched with his blood.
Not that Marcus would ever do that.

>>18522397
>if you like that, wait until you read the new testament

>>18522407
too real

>>18522397
I... don't know. I can't discuss books, let alone with females.

fuck off pleb

hiss at her

>>18522568
About that...

>what's the correct move here
Comment the book with her. Just that

Oh yes, this is my favorite passage
> in sexual intercourse it is no more than the friction of a membrane and a spurt of mucus ejected
Along with
>One man prays: 'how can I sleep with that woman?' Your prayer is 'How can I lose the desire to sleep with her?'
Please leave, you are provoking desire in me

>>18522397
>I love that book!
Me too!

>>18522416
>on.... Hmmm this website...
This is too real

>>18522397
> "Désolé, mais j'aime pas les Anglos(e)."

just recite aphorism 9 from beyond good and evil

>>18522397
>Good for you, who asked?

>>18522397
Thanks I’m reading it to be less retarded.

>>18522397
>the only thing you've read of this book is the title, just this second. Wait... what the fuck?! How did I get in this memehabitat coffee shop? You actually paid over six dollars for Swiss Miss in a comode with a handle? This is literally hell and you are the soulless spawn of the devils own strumpet.

>>18522397
*punches her in the face repeatedly*
*molests her*
meditate on that you stupid woman!

>>18522397
it has a penis so run away

I have literally had this conversation
I said that I was thinking of just going full Diogenes and living in a barrel
she made a public masturbation joke
we talked for a while, but it was a wedding reception and we parted ways after getting pretty drunk.
after she left I did cocaine with an obese sues chef from Hilton Head

>>18522791
Chuck? Is that you?

>>18522797
Yes, who is this?

>>18522791
Nice it sounds like you make a lot of mistakes

>Huh? Oh, yeah! I'm only a chapters in but so far I really like it! I've been meaning to read it for a while now but honestly it was so hard to find a good used copy. When did you read it?

this of course is a filthy lie but keeps the conversation as open as possible

>>18522801
Seed's

https://vocaroo.com/1jsKVAxRPI8g

>>18522849
>>18522772

>>18522410
>spic

>>18522397
Hello sweetie, let me talk at you about Rene Guenon for 4 hours.

>stop speaking to me you hole with hands

>>18522877
Excuse me, but the right pejorative is monkey.

>>18522397
have a conversation with her?
I mean she already initiated the conversation

>she asks what I do for work

>>18522978
I don't work

>>18522397

Call your lawyer. This is a setup, you're just waiting for the details.

>>18522474
Why the fuck is that image so big? I have to scroll for five fucking minutes if I want to read the damn thing. Here, I made it better.

>>18522469
falstaf come back to twitter i promise I won't let BAP rape you

>>18522978
I need to get a job bros. (and a gf)

>>18522439
Treat humans like humans, ignore the pedestal and reject idolatry.

>>18522397
Women shouldn't be allowed to read at all.

What? No? Wtf are you on about, this is the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe.

>>18522791
Very "there could be niggers here" of you

>>18522735
Based. Actually, this has happen'd to me. Not exactly with Marcus Aurelius, but there are two types of people regarding to book interest and you can see which one they are with something like this.
First one, if you give your own opinion and be vocal and passionate about it are going to simply responde with a stupid meme analysis and probably, the conversation won't last long. That or your going to hit a point in wich you're the only one speaking.
The second is truly intersted in the book and, though they might not agree with you on your opinion (it has to be a real and honest opinion, not just an attack you read on /lit/ for the work), will engage in discussion and you might get a real good friend or at least an acquaintance with who you can talk honestly about books.

>>18522978
we trade cryptos all night while stoned out of our mind

>>18522978
>Work? Hehe, I'm a philosopher!

>>18522397
Any favorite quotes? Something to demonstrate you've actually read something other than the cover I'm holding? WHY ARE YOU LYING TO ME BITCH.

>>18522791
wow so bohemian so gonzo so cool
FUCKING NOT
reads like a shitty affected person 'piece' by some brain damaged hipster who spends half the time describing food and furniture in the NYT

>>18522877
>amerimutt

>>18522397
>no, this is Plato.

>>18523947
>100% northern European genetics with aristocratic ancestors
>not american
COPE

I don't find it hard to have conversations one on one with people, men or women, I just never initiate

>>18522439
youre doing great
its hard at the beginning but eventually itll work out friend
believe in yourself

>>18522978
>im a student
>oh i study physics
>"oooo you must be pretty smart"
every time. ill fall for the one girl that wont be impressed.

>>18523353
lol wtf are you talking about

>>18522791
That's pretty anon. I have had a few of those moments myself. Enjoy them.

>>18523942
You are a parody

>>18523979
hav

>>18522476
>Uh... okay. Um I got to go sorry

>>18524014
>You are a parody
the irony is staggering

>>18522397
yeah? ive got a nice collection of stoic books at home. how about you come over for coffee and ill show you?

>>18524061
I have a kindle. Should I start buying books to pull things like these on people who read?

>>18524064
No, that wouldn't make any sense unless you quit using your kindle.

helon

>>18524064
no, you need real physical books for it to work. imagine a library full of books vs a small piece of crap that has some books in it.

jokes aside, a girl thats into you wont care

>>18524020
>registered democrat and a bernie fan
OH NONONONO

>>18524061
does this actually work? nearly everytime ive tried inviting girls over they say "uuhhhh no thanks"

>>18524090
Yes, I know. I was joking too. KEK definitely not giving up on my kindle.

99% chance this woman likes Stoicism because it gets her through her “hustle
& grind” without complaining #ABS

>>18524233
I'm sorry, are you surprised that women are like this? Reject the egalitarian lie.

>>18522397
FUCK OFF FEMCEL W*M*N DOXER

>>18524089
This happens to me when I start talking about the neolithic cucksheds in Europe prior to the PATRIARCHAL LIBERATION by the indo-aryan steppe warrior nomads
>picrel

>>18522397
I stare intently for a moment at her rugged jawline and a sudden epiphany seizes me. Smiling, I finish the last sip of my bitter, black coffee and stand. As I push in my chair I lean in close to her. With my lips nearly pressed against her ears I drop my voice to a barely audible whisper, "You will never be a woman."

I immediately leave without paying the bill, for which he will now be stuck with.

>>18524270
this is the latest mental illness to come out of /pol/: the belief that any woman with more jaw than you must secretly be a man

>>18524270
wow very based

>>18524345

>>18522397
>Yes me too I find it fascinating that we can read the mind of an ancient and distinguished Roman emperor.

>>18524388
nice, very normal and well adjusted, extremely impressed.

I GO TO NEW YORK PUBLIC LIBRARY
AND MASTURBATE INTO THE BOOKS I DONT LIKE

>>18524437
Are you going to write a book about it?

>show me your penis

>>18522397
from the most ancient of times the W*M*N has attempted to subvert the intellectual and physical capcaity of man to become subservient SEMEN DONOR to their world wide international of gross dykism and other nonsensical and equally repulsive "deconstructionist" ways of life. they always END their cdiscussion around matriarchy, worshipping the FEMCEL and fat obese bull dyke dried-womb who is meant to snuff out the life energy of the masculine youth. Look at the state of the land of Europe prior to the Aryan conquest, it was dominated by W*M*N who were obese, controlling, domineering, who themselves formed a religion around their own FATASSES (cult of the mother). men lived around 20-30 morons jam packed int oa single cuckshed eating off the floor like animals while the W*M*N, all fat and ugly and abhorrent, ruled over them. they were weak men, they didn 't possess any physical strength, they were "agriculturists" living feebly and PAYPIGGING their labor to the OBESE COWS.

when, over the horizon, came the thudding of chariots this pathetic bonobo society of masturbators and living cuckolds was virutally exterminated to the last living man. it was exterminated to the point where the modern DNA of europeans contains little TO NO neolithic DNA. This means that the Aryan conquerors weren't even raping the W*M*N, probably because they were so putrid, fat, and horrendous. the castrated femcel worshipping men were probably systematically exterminated, and thier places of living were all totally destroyed and burnt and replaced with FORTS and KURGANS. I like to imagine the W*M*N were forced into a kind of chattel slavery, serving the HORSE LORDS until they dropped dead from their own FATASSES.

>>18524457
this cycle produced "THE WEST" as we understand it. for the majority of human existence is like a yeast infection. stinking, putrid, overcrowded, existing only to parasitically live off biomass that lives for no other purpose than subservience, slavery, and consumerism. look at the HAN CHINESE history for this... this is the "default mode of life" for mankind, a worthless biomass of braindead rice farmers dominated by their mother-in-laws and castrated into "civil service" and other meaninglessness. it was the ARYAN CONQUEST and PATRIARCHAL rule that brought the great crack in the wheel of time. its the only reason we got ROME, PHILOSOPHY, THE ARTS, MUSIC, the great sonnets... the MARBLE DORICISMM... the triumphant arches of victory like Hadrian's where he took revenge against the matriarchal JEWS for their bloodshed in the KITOS WAR. it was this that led the high adventure for the great conquests of Alexander, the hoplites all unique warriors in arrays of colors fighting against the FACELESS MASS of the Near East... yes it was this that broke the yeast infection cycle of W*M*N rule that allowed man to fulfill his destiny and seize the stars themselves... if only technology had allowed for it Rome would have built a NOVA ROMA on the moon for all we know.

PIC REL:
the "venus of willendorf" of W*M*N rule... the fat obese matriachal cow that snuffed out the life of the neolithic european man vs. THE ROMAN WOMAN and the interpretation of the BEAUTY of the Patriarchy... the splendor, the dignity, the craftsmanship, the figure, the sexuality, the sensualty.... yes you can see "hyper sexuality" existed in both cases but look at the marked difference in sexuality for the W*M*N and the woman... there is a marked difference in appeal. the neolithic matriarches lived in cucksheds, the Roman patriarchy built the FORVM...

>>18524474
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VkeLkuFzPfM
TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRT AND STAND WITH CHEST OUT AND SING THIS SONG
now look at what the modern W*M*N woudl rather have you listen to...... there is a return of the cuckshed coming and a collapse back into the yeast life, the stagnating pool of worldwide CALCUTTA SLUMS, of stinking piles of hueman biomass trash that will swallow up all culture, high art, linguistical power... all of it is fading as the W*M*N attempt to seize control again

>>18522397
michael shannon looking ass

>>18524203
If you litterally just met? 99% chance of fail, unless you are a gigachad with godly social skill AND she's an easy girl (a modest girl will never come to your house and have sex first time we will met)
After you had some knowledge with each others? More than possible. If she's willing to pass much time with you, she's clearly sending a message. But you can still fuck it up by being rude or creepy

>>18524345
poor little triggered snowflake

>>18524548
no we knew each other for a while

>>18522397
Yeah, got memed into it, I think its dogshit

>>18524558
Had you dates before?

>>18524474
Nice rhetoric. Fuck you subhuman trash. Your narrative is 3rd grade donkey shit. Did in the horrible poverty you deserve while the global elites hoard the rest of the oil, water, and land that's still usable.

>>18524576
>calls my rhetoric on a "3rd grade" level
>uses the term "donkey shit" to supplement this
lmao FEMCEL MAD
>global elites
whomst? funny how in the WEST these "elites" you mention are systematically pushing:
1 feminism (extreme format)
2 subservient men (constant attacks against masculinity)
3 pacifism
4 communal living (PODS)
5 transexuality
ALMOST LIKE THEY FIGURED SOMETHING OUT FROM NEOLITHIC EUROPE...............

>>18522978
>well babe, I'm what you'd call a welfare king
>*slurp drink loudly*
>yep toots, my intellectual odyssey is your tax dollars at work
>*slip my phone number (actually my parents landline but I have a line set up in my room) into her cleavage and slap her ass on the way out*
Works every time.

>>18522397
S-Sneed...

>>18524574
nope just acquaintances or friends. pretty sure i'm just turbo autistic and seemed weird. didn't even wanna do anything, just honestly wanted to hang out

>>18522791
Love that memory

>>18524576
Fat roastie detected

>>18522791
based cynic

>>18523334
Much easier said than done

>>18523942
go see a shrink before you go full taxi driver

>>18522989
>>18523023
>>18523885
>>18523892
>>18524655
>>18522978
At least on this board I can be surrounded with like-minded individuals

>>18524679
Yes, asking a woman you had never had one-on-one dates to go to your house is always weird, and likely to faily unless you are a confident gigachad AND she's kinds easy

You should had asked before if she was interested in one-on-one dates, then propose the house after a few meetings. You likely burned this bridge, but if you didnt scared her too much you may have a chance to salve it

>>18524576
dilate

Guarantee you if any woman said this its because the book was in her previous bf's collection.

>>18522791
Why were you reading at a wedding reception?
Fucking pseud

Tell her women shouldn’t be allowed to read and thrash her with a reed in the restaurant

>>18522439
Imagine the person that you are talking to as if they are beneath you / lesser human than you, that will help you.

>>18522410
>o santo desconfia
O pobre desconfia

>>18525020
Based and egoist pilled. Once you realize that a solid two thirds of people have nothing of value to offer, it makes talking with them a breeze.

>>18522397
Tell her about it and placate her interest for the sex hook up

>>18524474
>look at the HAN CHINESE history for this
lol what

>>18522849
this was very cute

>>18522397
What a real anon would do: fake a seizure.

>>18522849
Very convincing girl voice, anon. Ty.

>>18522410
That's a better saying than "If it's too good to be true". We southern Europeans have so many better sayings, I heard Russians do to.

>>18522397
rape her

>>18522397
Fuck off whore. I don't think you have the mental capacity to read. I don't think women can read. In fact, i don't think, nay i believe, women should be allowed to read. Go back to the kitchen. If you want more freedom, i'll buy you a bigger kitchen.

The END. Get lost.

*kick her on her flat ass*

>>18522632
This would unironically work on 60%+ of women. You'll seem more interesting and valuable because you gave a (soft) rejection, and they'll try harder to win you over..

>>18522849
cute

>>18522632
>Please leave, you are provoking desire in me
best pick up line

>>18522849
will jerk off to your voice tonight anon, thanks

>>18524200
i just meant you look like him

>>18522849

>>18522397
leave because she had bad taste and/or has already been manipulated by an alt right body builder.

>>18526553
This it too literal. We also have a 'Bom demais pra ser verdade.' but it is no fun.

>>18524707
I thought it was easier done than said, maybe thats my flaw, to contray to fit in.

>>18526628
That seems like a risky gambit, lets see how it plays out. *10years later* still a better love story than... Any other.

>>18526799
that was a man anon...

>>18522454
OH I'M GONNA.... IM GONNA COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

>>18528210
And?

>>18522397
Ask to see her based and redpilled cock

>>18523942
Have you ever had fun, anon?

>>18528880
No

>>18522397
>give her Ryan Gosling eyes
>say nothing
>wait for her to say something else

>>18522410
Tinha que ser brasileiro

>>18529136
Claro, anão. Você vai tá lendo 'meditações do marco aurélio' e vai chegar uma loira gata dessas te dando moral por nada mesmo. Se fosse algum livro muito bom, acho que até vai.

>>18529161
Pior que até não é impossível, mas tão improvável que o ditado se encaixa perfeitamente. Eu acharia que é mais provável ela tentar te drogar e roubar seu rim.

>>18522849
Please marry me. I'm an artist, freelancer, read books daily, exercise daily and I'm open to having a relationship with someone with mental prolems.
I'll be patiently waiting for your response.

>>18529295
This guy has handcuffs on his radiator

>>18529136
KEK esse daí nunca assistiu teste de fidelidade.

>have you read any of the prior stoics? They are much superior I think, I recommend starting with Epictetus.

there is no good move, reading books in public is usually a good strategy to be ignored while also feeling like your better than everyone else.

>>18524613
bap is that u

>>18522477
IT'S BECAUSE HE CAN'T HEAR VERY WELL WE SHOULD ALL TALK LOUDER TO INCLUDE HIM

>>18524003
> impressed

Why would she be impressed you fucking nerd

>>18529295
>Please marry me

Unironically this

>>18522849
Literally a discordtranny or some fag's tranny gf

>>18530529
hi Monerbro