/lit/ - Literature

Why are people on /lit/ so terrible when it comes to writing on /lit/? Every thread is filled with paragraphs of shit that could be summarised in 1-3 sentences.

If you can't articulate your thoughts simply, you're not a good writer.

>>18220628
>Every thread is filled with paragraphs of shit that could be summarised in 1-3 sentences.
Honestly, it depends. There's place in writing for both flowery writing and short, concise, and to the point writing. Infact, a good write uses a combination of both. Because it makes their writing flow better

>>18220628
Most just seem clueless what writing is even about in the first place. Probably down to reading a few novels they were told a great literature and then just attempting to emulate the stuff without understanding why.

>>18220628
Probably because 90% of the board is non-fiction so /lit/tards don't know the first thing about writing.

>>18220669
>Most just seem clueless what writing is even about in the first place.
Aspiring writer here, what in your eyes, constitutes good writing? For me personally, I try to find a good balance of themes, emotional riffs that resonate with the reader, and some palpitate prose that flows and paints a vivid picture within my reader's mind. It's hard though, especially the prose aspect.

Is it okay to write with a rhythm in mind? Or at least, does anyone else pick up on rhythm? I say everything I'm writing out loud and when editing reread it out loud before rewriting to make sure everything sounds nice. Is this something anyone else considers or am I crazy?

>>18220719
Yes that's fine. Other people will read differently but as long as you're aware of that you'll be okay.

>>18220697
It's all about telling a story. Think of the shit adults told you when they tried to entertain you or even the fairy tales you read as a kid; the characters were flatter than Keira's tits. The themes simplistic crap. The prose easy enough for a child to understand. You still were excited to experience these and got your emotional riffs in the process.

Obviously you can and should tweak these smaller parts as much as you can to further enhance the picture, give it more depth and whatelse but the story you want to tell comes first and the purpose should be obvious on every page.

I bet it'd do the average /lit/ writer a world of good to step the fuck back to the oral tradition of story telling. It's all in the very, very basics.

I need to make money fast. Please share any tips to start making money from your fiction if you’ve got any. Thanks in advance.

>>18220774
Go to indeed.com type in your zip code and look for jobs.

>>18220598
Everytime I sit down to write my book I end up going to writing prompts instead and writing stupid shit there kek

>>18220774
>I need to make money fast.
>fiction
Lol. Good luck with that. Maybe write some smut on request.

>>18220788
Some of the most fun I ever have when writing is to write something I think will be hilarious and read it back a week later

>>18220774
unironically say that you're writing smut like >>18220792 says on fiverr.

I myself made like, ten euros on fiverr on a month but people only asked for cringe shit like self inserts with (y/n) level of stupidity.

I still have it open, but most of the money I have I made through Gamestop like a giant fucking moron.

>>18220810
granted that I myself did not advertise to write smut on fiverr because I'm using my real name and my real face there.

My supervisor thinks all contemporary fiction is trash and that genre fiction is even worse. I try to do both. I don’t know how to tell him.

What books do you attribute as critical to the development of your personal writing style?

A dilemma has been bothering me for the past few weeks. I was up at around 3 ish AM playing the original Borderlands 3 when I heard footsteps followed with a loud thud. I went down to see what was happening and saw that it was my mother. She was scantily dressed and reeked of goat piss and mutton. Needless to say , that night was the first night of a week full of sleepless nights. My mom would sneak out and come back home an hour later. I didn't know where she was going ,so i decided to follow her out this time. She walked down 3 blocks and entered a matte black rolls Royce ghost. The street was pitch dark and cold. I hid behind a rock and saw everything that unfolded. It was a muslim man. Roughly 54 years old. He undressed her and fucked her right there in the car. I was extremely hard. I recorded the full thing. Went home and coomed the hardest that I have in years. Every night the car would be parked right there. I would sneak out , jerk off behind my coom rock , run back home before my mom got back. However I decided I had enough and wanted more so I devised a plan. I snuck into my mom's room , to steal the panties that she was wearing. I came looking for gold and found diamonds. A box full of letters from her past lovers which described full of letters from her past lovers which described in detail the things they would do together. All of them muslim. I stole every single one of those letters and got back to my room. I busted a nut to each and every letter. Eventually I came across a letter from a Mohamad Omar Farooq which described the things they did in the rolls Royce ghost. Amongst the letters I found another one in which the was seething about how he has no heirs to leave property worth 7500 crores to. I'm a liberal arts NEET and decided that this is my chance to securing a better future. Since then , I've been trying to pass as muslim so I can lay claim to the property. Do I look passable enough now ?

>>18220798
Yea I quiet enjoy writing these down. I think I am also using it to procrastinate

>>18220774
Smut commisions?

do you write in past or present tense? it seems as if most fiction is past by default, and I wasn't even aware I was writing in the present tense until someone told me yesterday
is it a habit I should try to break? I looked up the pros and cons, and for me it feels natural

>>18221032
Writing in present tense is extremely cringe, however, conforming to society's standards because you're afraid of being cringe is even more cringe.

>>18221032
I write exclusively in first person present tense. My goal is almost always to leave a reader with a sensation of proximity that feels intrusive, either in the sense that they are intruding into my narrator's thoughts, or that they're absorbing his thoughts through osmosis. I also just really enjoy stream of consciousness.

>>18221035
why is it though? everyone says that but they usually just say that YA fiction is usually present tense, but just because some present tense writing is bad doesn't mean all of it is, since the same argument can be made for past
screenplays are written in present, and it seems like present tense feels more unpredictable and cinematic as it's happening right there and then, rather than being a retelling of events

>>18221054
Not him but I just find the shit distracting. Also it doesn't make sense for me, since I'm reading the story, it's shit that happened, otherwise it wouldn't be written.

>>18221084
It's really difficult to pull off. I rarely if ever do.

>>18221096
And when you do, would it really be worth all the extra effort?

>>18221105
Absolutely, because it's what I want to do. It's always worth it. Could I write something easier to read and more accessible by going into past tense and/or third person? Probably. I have had more success with my third person experiments in a general sense than I have with my laboriously wrought FP/PT works. It stands to logic that more people would be inclined to appreciate my writing and give me dick rubs if I gave up on one or the other. I'm just at a point in my life where I don't feel like I need to make those kinds of concessions on account of anyone but myself. Even if that means I'll never write a single thing other people genuinely like and die unknown, it's not like I'm actually losing anything. That's the same outcome if I never wrote in the first place. So, yeah. For me it's absolutely worth it.

>>18220598
>The art of fiction
Which one?
>inb4 phoneposter faggot
I have 4chan and a shitload of other websites blocked with cold turkey (it's an app)on my laptop for 6 months to stop procrastinating when i am supposed to be working

>>18221157
>I have 4chan and a shitload of other websites blocked with cold turkey (it's an app)on my laptop for 6 months to stop procrastinating when i am supposed to be working
Time to install it on your phone too then.

>>18220989
Where does one look for these to types of jobs

>>18220792
>>18220810
>>18220989
Can I do this totally anonymously? I mean anonymously like my work will never be found out and connected to my person?

>>18221242
Depends on what languages you know. Asian ones are usually well organized with sites like skeb and others. For western, I'm not sure.

>>18221251
>totally anonymously
You still need to recieve money somehow, no?

>>18221253
>For western, I'm not sure.
Poop

>>18220810
>Gamestop
Buy SHIB now

>>18220810
>fiverr
What category would you advertise under? There are so many lol

HOW DO I LEARN SCREENWRITING

>>18221430
piss off and read some fucking screenplays

I got bored and wrote this. I don't write regularly. I think I sort of envisioned it as a soft intro to some sort of setting. Do I have potential or am I just an idiot? First person perspective's off for me too, but I don't think I did bad considering.

>>18221181
Can't you read?
>when i'm supposed to be working
Since i am here, it's because im not supposed to be working right now, or do you think a fucking phone is a workstation?
>inb4 you could be using your phone when you are supposed not to
Nah i leave it outside my office
Also this whole conversation is not the point of my post, so if you are not going to answer the question then refrain from posting

>>18221441
How much do you read? There are tons of cliches

>>18221441
This honestly sounds like the ramblings of a mad psychopath. Dude lost his family and he's writing like a 19th century washed up novelist.
Is this the /lit/ school of writing at work?

>>18221514
Very little as of current. Tolkien and Lovecraft are the extent of what I've read mostly.

>>18221441
Definitely needs work but I’ve seen worse on these threads. It doesn’t flow well and the way you structured it is jarring. I get that the style makes sense for what the character is trying to convey but too much can be a bad thing.

>>18221441
All I learned after this is that some guy is sad about some massacre and mad about some sea people who are pretty good at massacres. It doesn't work for me because I don't know the person nor know why I should care about them or their problems.

>>18221541
>Tolkien
So it wasn't in my head that the ending sounded a bit like the stuff from Moria, eh?

>>18221360
writing & translation > Creative Writing

>>18221340
I'm not touching actions anymore haha, I'm not that smart and I'm happy with what I did on GME

>>18221251
unless you make comissions via a forum instead of fiverr and use patreon to get paid instead of direct transaction, maybe.

>>18221259
Yeah, but I suppose I could set up a pay pal account linked to burner cards or something.

I keep hearing how important it is to find your tastes and your voice. I gather that’s basically done by reading the authors that you like. But how do you do you refine just reading into reading authors you like? How did you? You just read until stuff really starts to stick out?

>>18221775
Your brain is a sponge unless you have dementia and it's a sieve. Read stuff, it becomes part of you.

>>18220628
>why are the shitposts on the resident bookstuff board so verbose
I feel like it's really obvious

>>18220774
Smut and romance are the only money makers in literature

>>18221885
nah im gonna write a series of fantasy stories that become wildly popular and get tons of shitty adaptations. Then I'll live the rest of my life fat and happy.

>>18221913
You and everybody else in this thread, every high schooler who read Harry Potter and saw a Marvel movie, every college loser who did both and hated each but understands mass appeal, and every disatisfied middle aged person working a 9-5 right now

>>18221983
well im actually going to do it

Does anyone use this?

>>18222032
>sub
I'm not into cuckoldry, Mr Goldstein.

>>18221251
Yes. NidoranDuran for example is a smut writer who shits out like 5 erotic fanfics a week, where he gets paid 3 cents per a word for each.

How do I truly break down stories to learn?
What's the one thing I should start with that's there on OP?
How can I become more creative, as in training it with short stories, to eventually move on from my as of now decently developed ideas into more and more? As in not to feel like I ran out of things or just thinking about the same things to do or explore?

>>18222157
>dunno who that is
>Find him and his twitter
>check his comissions
>Fucker be doing 4 times what I did with than half the amount of words.

Fuck

>>18222068
Eh, you can pirate an older version if it bothers you that much

Okay. So where’s the best place to go read successful erotica and smut?

>>18221032
I write in first person present tense, sometimes for minor/background characters I write in limited third person present tense. Though every chapter is limited to one pov.

>>18221441
1st paragraph can be broken into 2 or even 3 more.

>>18221559
>writing & translation > Creative Writing
Thanks anon

>>18222254
panda express near the Round Rock, TX wal-mart.

Do you decide on a title before you start writing or after?

>>18222400
I see where it goes. Sometimes the title leads me to the story. Sometimes I find thr title exile writing.

>>18222400
Titles are concerns for editors. IDGAF

>>18222400
Sometimes I have it lined up. Other times I figure it out along the way. Lately, I finish a book and have no fucking clue what to name it.

>>18222400
In my early proto draft, I spent a good year or so deliberating on one before I settled on something that I was satisfied with. I think I had at least one person here suggest I change it, but I won't.

>>18222400
It's one of the first steps for me after having a rough idea.

>>18222400
I'm really good at coming up with titles

When writing a story, do you come up with a theme first, or do you start with the setting and characters? I'd like to write a thematically cohesive narrative, but it's hard to not be too heavy-handed about it. Any advice?

>>18222568
Characters > their conflict/goal/motivation > bigger picture (aka. more characters and conflicts) > setting

Then I just look for the theme inside of this and empathize it for further steps.

I'm about 60 pages into the Art of Fiction and I feel like I'm sifting through a treasure trove of knowledge. I'm really enjoying it.
For those that have read it, what are some lessons and advice that you felt has helped improve your writing?

>>18222568
I start with characters and let their conflicts choose a theme for me, and if that doesn't work I think about the plot and use it to highlight the theme. It's rare where I'm like "I want to write a book about the dichotomy of destiny and free will" and build things around that. Characters and conflicts, then plot, and if one is better than the other for theme, I focus on that.

do you think screenwriting can be considered literature?

>>18222747
No, screenwriting is of the visual arts, rap music or opera isn't literature either.

>>18222447
This is unmeasurably based.
Titles are marketing bullshit. ''Necessary'', but still bullshit.

Is there any way that an info dump is allowable? I’m at a point in my story where it would be pretty reasonable for the characters who don’t know what’s going on to ask the ones who do about the situation. But that would still be “show, don’t tell” and be a filthy lot of exposition, wouldn’t it?

>>18223015
If I have an infodump, I at least want it to be something tangible, like a fictional book, a preacher, a bard, whatever. I don't ever infodump unless it's small things for expediency's sake.

>>18222876
Nah. Titles are an extra tool to put the reader into the right mood.
>>18223015
If the character logically couldn't know the shit, asking for stuff can be plot progression and the likes, not info dumping. Also why do you think there would be a lot of it? Most exposition can be skipped.

>>18223015
If you really must infodump, put it into it's own designated chapter where you can keep it separated from the rest of the story and your readers can easily skip it when they realize it's one of those chapters.
Infodumping is never necessary.

I find it funny you’d rather spend your limited existence making stupid plot diagrams and writing silly fantasies than really breathing the air and living life, hiking or playing chess with friends. How quaint.

>>18223182
It's more fun than any of the shit you suggested.

>>18223194
“Fun” entertainment is for the plebeian masses, who only spend their time on music and the mere senses than turning their mind onto the good, onto philosophy.

>>18223182
Are there really people who think like this? There are so many ways to live life. Seems a pity some shmucks feel like there’s only one “right” way of doing it.

Jesus fucking Christ, ignore the obvious bait.

>>18223056
>Also why do you think there would be a lot of it? Most exposition can be skipped.
I suppose. It’s just that they’re dealing with beings who simply don’t care about things the way others normally would, so I feel like explaining their motivation and the culture around it is necessary.

>>18221983
Hey now hey now, don't dream it's over.

>>18223225
>impotent ramblings of dead guys
Yeah, no, thanks, bud.

>>18222482
I know this may sound stupid coming up with a cover on canva was pretty fun part of my drafting process.

>>18223249
So you’re famous?

>>18223248
It actually sounds like something you can show in action if it's necessary but why is it even important for the reader or even the character to know?

>>18223256
Same here. I fucking love drawing covers. They make me think more about the stuff in the story too, since only the most crucial things should be on it.

>>18223263
Fine. I get it. No motivations ever need to be explained ever.

>>18223282
I mean, it's usually obvious either way. Unless the motivations themselves are some sort of a plot point (aka. knowing them can be used in some way) what do they really offer but bloat?

Day off work tomorrow
Do I write the whole night until 6 AM or play Dark Souls?

>>18223282
He's not attacking you anon. He's trying to get you to think critically about why your infodump about the other culture is necessary. You could also write the infodump completely to your satisfaction, then look at what you explained and see what you can show through action/interaction and what can be relegated to the infodump.

>>18223341
NGMI.

Here’s this again, now I’m done with it. Thanks for the anons from last thread who critique my work. It’ll help me.

>>18223341
If you have to ask, you’ll never be good enough to be read, let alone remembered as a man of letters.

>>18223317
I didn't comment earlier but the way it's written is impassionate. I mean doing with the POV it's written (I know third person can be lacking that).
>He hit the floor with a reverberating thud
Either:
His head/body hit the floor with a reverberating thud
or
He felt his back/head hit the floor with a reverberating thud
Depending on POV it becomes a lot more personal. Same for the whole thing. I don't know if others feel the same but it stuck out for me. Saw a few typos
>wriggled and squirmed
Also I would substitute
>ding-dong noise
with
>ringing of the doorbell/something similar
simply a style preference

>>18223259
Just a random story on Royalroad,

>>18223372
The story is third-person limited told from the perspective of the sister. I thought I made that clear in the last thread.

>>18223349
>You could also write the infodump completely to your satisfaction, then look at what you explained and see what you can show through action/interaction and what can be relegated to the infodump.
This sounds logical and I kinda did that for my writing but the big danger is that you might end up internalizing the knowledge too much and it becomes harder to see it from a fresh reader perspective to tell whether something is really needed or not. Though guess it can be fixed with beta readers.

These days I approach it from "questions the character would ask" position. And since different people are interested in different shit, having multiple POV allows to reveal different parts from the world in an organic way.

>>18223417
>These days I approach it from "questions the character would ask" position. And since different people are interested in different shit, having multiple POV allows to reveal different parts from the world in an organic way.
That's a reasonable idea. I ended up doing that at the end of my second book to explain why a city got wiped off the map, and looking back I wish I hadn't done it because it was very poorly executed. It's probably better to do it while everyone is exploring a cultural hub rather than do it around a camp fire or in a house together.

>>18222600
what are some that youve found?

>>18223417
The reader doesn't need to know everything. It's the concept of the unknowable evil in horror, people will make up far more imaginative things than you could ever come up with.

>>18223604
Damn straight. Sometimes when I write a horror story I'll deliberately leave a few pages blank to really scare the readers.

>>18223800
I don't know if it's sarcasm or trying to be funny, but if you're the same anon who has been shooting down every piece of advice, I can assure you, you're not as charming or witty as you think you are.

Do you guys create daily backups of whatever you write? If not, why? Not afraid of loosing things and not being able to read things you rewrote?

>>18224136
saved in real time in the cloud

>>18224136
I save all my work in a OneDrive sync'd folder so it backs up automatically. It's how I work on the same piece of writing from both my desktop, laptop and occasionally phone.

>>18224136
I just have everything on my hard drive. I need a backup drive but I keep putting it off.

>>18224242
You could probably get away with a USB stick these days, some of them are huge and documents don't tend to take up that much space.

>>18224136
Most of what I write are ideas and dream snippets. They're stored on my phone because it's the only thing I can grab and write text on after reaching Theta or alpha states, that is to say right after waking up or after a shower.
I need to organize the hundreds of notes I have before downloading it, but thanks for the reminder, anon.

>>18224318
just use gdocs, it works well for phone writing unless your snippets are crimethink

On page 92 now. Getting all settled in to write while I watch livestream which is surprisingly effective because my hands stay hovering over one keyboard or the other.
You know, I'm turning 35 on the 28th. I had this huge plan to go to Japan and live off my books and I've got like a 150k net worth without a house but living on an artist visa and chipping away at that leaves a pretty nasty risk of not allowing me to retire later so I was talking to an elderly fan of mine and he told me just wait until I was 40 and see where I'm at then.
He and my dad aren't wrong. I mean I wanted to see the Olympics before the world went haywire but I still need to finish 2 more books, do audiobooks of them and translations into Japanese to show them I'm serious. (I want to see the places I grew up as a kid and see how things shape up to my young memory. Life goals etc.)
I do find it kinda weird that someone who writes about death has most of his fans as retirees but I'll take it.
Kinda sucks being like yeah I'm 35 soon and they're all you're just a baaaaby but it's fine.
Just trying to do a bunch of stuff and I feel like I'm a lot slower than I want to be.

can i get a prompt please

>>18224387
If you have nothing to write about then fuck off.

>>18224387
Man farts so bad that it causes an anal fissure. He is on a crowded bus in Detroit.

>>18224376
I had that same exact desk 10 years ago and I don't know how to feel about this.

>>18224387
Go on ai dungeon and whip something up. I'm not going to check myself but flash fiction thread's purpose is prompts as well, but they're all kinda cringe desu.

>>18224387
BOY HAS STEAMY RELATIONS WITH SISTER

>>18224446
It's a very good desk. You just have to be careful with it. I remember one year I was spinning around in my chair just being a dweeb and you know where my computer keyboard is sitting? On that shelf with the metal bit that lets it slide out?
I caught my big toenail in it as I was doing a high speed spin. It's okay though it grew back and everything is normal but it gave me insight into the emotional switch from excitement, shock and then finally panic when it happened.
I don't know how our bodies are so durable yet so fragile at the same time.

>>18224376
How many books have you written?
Genre?
How do you publish?
What is your monthly income?

I have a full time job, family, etc. I write for fun now. Very short stories about characters etc. I want to write a full fledged novel and try to publish but not sure if I wanna sacrifice more of my home life for something that may never work out. I'm not wanting to be rich. Just comfortable.

Politically, if a corrupt counsel member wanted to manipulate the male childhood friend of the king-to-be, assuming said friend is newly knighted, how would he use him?

>>18224387
Go to r/writingprompts there are millions.

>>18224397
thanks, here's what i got.

I had a suspicion, and the roaring applause from this Marriott conference room as I take the podium confirms it, I should not be here. The field of bald heads and gray hair letting loose its emotion for the sake of my work brings water to my eyes. I’m sure many have had this experience, but my tears feel unique in the moment. They come bearing guilt rather than joy or humility.
I grew up a fan of anime and super hero movies. They drew me in and made me feel so important. The sounds and colors, the thrill. I enjoyed the thrill of escape above anything. I took to writing stories that mimicked the things I liked. Black Widow has red hair, so my women have red hair. I found I had an uncanny ability to understand the construction of these stories I enjoyed. I understood intuitively how they built suspense and action. With that ability this hobby of writing developed into a career before I could notice.
I published the third edition to my series of novels without ever interacting with a single “professional” in the field. I was told I had earned a reputation for mystery, but truly I was playing World Of Warcraft. This stage today is the first I’ve ever stood on, and those people that spoke to me yesterday were the first I ever talked to at length about the craft of writing, let alone my own work. I was taken off guard immediately. They called my book a “deconstruction.” They said I was a genius, that I was going to seriously change things. I was left largely silent.
Now here I stand, in front of scholars ready for me to lead the charge. I don’t understand a word of it. I’m leaving.

>>18222184
bump

>>18224543
>Bumping when the thread is on the first page.
Jesus fucking Christ.

>>18224543
your question is confusing

>>18224549
he's bumping his question he asked earlier in the thread. is this bait

>>18224521
5 books. Fantasy/Mythology/Adventure (It's really just exploring the afterlife with the recently deceased protags.) It's all one series. I do self publishing but I don't really make living wages off my books. My advertising efforts aren't really there because I release in parts.
This is why I'm so hesitant about jumping over to Japan. Doing that means really ramping up on advertising BUT...what if that fails you know?
I want 2 more books, Audiobooks and some translations under my belt before I crank it up and try to draw people in.
I make most of my money through stocks and my full time job. It's like 30k a year, but it's really easy and has health insurance. I'd lose that if I went over.
I've written over 750k words but putting myself out there is extremely nerve wracking because I'm severely deaf and my voice just does not carry without a microphone.
I've got this foreboding fear that something like this will happen.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3siMJ0ueog
(Annie May warning, but I'm being a little dramatic.)
Eventually I'll launch my own site for my series but I'm relying on Amazon for now just because it's so low effort. I just mail in to the library of congress, get my number and pop it up on there and sometimes someone picks the book up and doesn't leave a review. Thanks mysterious people. I hope I made your day.

>>18222184
>>18224543
>not using a search engine for your questions
Do you guys even do basic research for your stories or do you come here and expects others to write your stories for you as well.

>>18224499
You intrigue me, also nice numbers.

Satisfy a thought, /lit/ - I have a feeling I might need to make writing a bigger part of my life.

I'm a market researcher who basically writes or talks for a living, dabbles in Wikipedia editing and had a few non-fiction pieces published in student magazines in college.

People who care about me tell me I need to 'do writing' more and I have no idea what this means or entails, so I usually bat it aside, but what if I'm wrong? Should I just take a kind of workmanlike pleasure in writing up statistical reports and focus group findings, or try fiction? The prospect of only writing non-fiction scares me; I already recycle my ideas to make money, and I don't have any original thoughts left within my field.

tl;dr - 'good prose writer' scared of the prospect of not having anything to write about and looking to try fiction to plumb the infinite instead.

>>18224571
The issue is that, who validates that information? I'd have to check and check, if I ask how not to blow up my car because X and Y happened, and I google it, how do I know it applies? But if someone else in the same situation, you get it. I prefer personal input

>>18224604
>Who validates that information?
>Comes to an Anonymous imageboard for source of information

>>18224618
We have something in common, yes, this anonymous imageboard means we are both similar when compared to others

>>18224624
Stop trying to justify your laziness. Next time just search up your questions.

>>18224604
literally you validate that information.
you have your process in you already you just need to find it, none of us here work like you and you wouldn't be able to work like any of us. If you are really so adverse to self discovery you might be looking into the wrong craft.

>>18224637
Look sweetheart, you will help me because I say so, so you can either make it happen now or we are going to be here a long long time bumping the same question, I can do it on autopilot so you won't be messing with me but I will be fucking your cute little thread.

>>18224583
Thank you, I'm trying my best. I hope when I finally find something that forces me out of the shadows I won't be consumed with that light. I'll keep fighting until I can entertain the world.
For me writing is something that comes naturally at this point and it's something I enjoy doing in general (probably aided by the fact my speaking voice isn't very good) but I guess start blogging, then just find something that makes you want to go on a tangent and write it down, then thing of something you want to explain and write it down.
Paper, electronic or not will become the friend you can always pour your thoughts onto. At least, that's how it is for me.

>>18224657
lmfao

>>18224604
You sound like you've never been to university. My 1st year was filled with lectures on "innovation" and how you need to be a deviant like Zuckerburg to succeed. In short, no one has any idea what makes stories successful. You've got Twilight, 50 Shades of Gray, Harry Potter, and whatever other books that no one thought would turn into cultural phenomenons. Even Cormac McCarthy went unnoticed for years before someone decided he was a literary genius. Take the shitty internet 101 advice and just write.

>>18224669
Last chance to help me sweetie
>>18224703
Fine

>>18224570
Ok thank you for the reply!

>>18224387

i have realised the book i want to write could take a decade. here is the first page of a throwaway piece

>>18224766
>a decade
Best get started on it, then.

>>18224766
Is there a term for using capitalisation to arouse suspicion or vaguely suggest irony, as in:

"It looked to John like this meeting was going to be another Big Deal" or

"John's wife was having Alone Time again"

Because it's my biggest bugbear and I don't even have the word for it.

>>18223567

>“No fiction can have real interest if the central character is not an agent struggling for his or her own goals but a victim, subject to the will of others. Failure to recognize that the central character must act, not simply be acted upon, is the single most common mistake in the fiction of beginners.”

>“In all major genres, vivid detail is the life blood of fiction… The reader is regularly presented with proofs -- in form of closely observed details -- that what is said to be happening is really happening.”

>“Thus the value of great fiction, we begin to suspect, is not that it entertains us or distracts us from our troubles, not just that it broadens our knowledge of people and places, but that it helps us to know what we believe, reinforced those qualities that are noblest in us, leads us to feel uneasy about our faults and limitations.”

>>18225054
All good advice. I almost caught myself on the first one:
>>“No fiction can have real interest if the central character is not an agent struggling for his or her own goals but a victim, subject to the will of others.
but then I remembered that internal conflict between dereliction of duty and responsibility still counts as the character struggling for his own goals.

>>18225054
pynchon is an exception to this

>>18224902
It's a My Biggest Bugbear

I have a race of various monsters with a mysterious origin, who can't climb anything, is it important that I somehow explain why or have some sort of theme behind it or can I just leave it at that? I really just need it as an excuse for worldbuilding that builds on their limitation.

>>18225124
>A character's internal struggle, whether he feels guilty for his inertia or is simple irresponsible and faces the consequences is an interesting and common struggle
>>18225198
Pynchon transcends all traditional writing practices lol

>>18225472
if you demonstrate that the monsters can't climb, then that's all the audience really needs to know. there's no reason to talk about the reason unless it's relevant to the plot.

>>18224136
Nah, only after big progress. I never lost any data from writing in a decade, so have no reason to feel too paranoid about it.

How can I write humor if I'm a painfully unfunny person?

>>18225472
Try and convey it without dialogue, that way it's available for the autists to read into without wasting time. Environmental storytelling is key for something like this, like having all those animals live in a place without trees or cliffs

>>18225530
This.

>>18225570
You're probably funnier than you think. I find that I am a pretty bad judge of my own humor. The jokes that I think are really clever and funny don't land but people crack up at the shit I thought was dumb or just a dry 4/10 joke to keep the mood light without actually expecting anyone to laugh

All I can write is erotica. At first all I did was write my most depraved fantasies down to get them out of my head. This was the only time I felt any kind of "compulsion" to write that many professional writers speak of. Try to write creatively was always a strain. I have many ideas in my head but when it comes time to write them down I find it so tedious and uninteresting I abandon my stories in chapter 1. I think it is because I spend too long mulling the ideas over in my mind, so that they are boring to me before I even start to write them.

This doesn't happen with erotica though. I have recurring fantasies, but they're different each time because I'm not hung up on the details as much. I just let my dick guide me. This means every erotic story I write is unexplored territory in a way, and writing it can be exciting. I can spend hours writing tens of thousands of words for erotica and forget to eat. Meanwhile I find writing 30 minutes continuously for my serious stories to be a daunting task.

So what I started doing was blending erotica with other genres. I started writing erotically charged adventure stories, or erotic comedic short stories, erotic sci-fi, whatever. And you know what? It fucking worked. I wrote a 40,000 word novella that started as an erotic short story about an explorer, and it barely had any sex or erotic content in it. I also have a 25,000 word fantasy short story, and a 29,000 sci-fi one. I've never been able to produce this much writing on a single idea before, and what they all have in common besides erotica is that they weren't based on any of my previous ideas. I just started writing and made it up as I went.

I've been doing it wrong all these years. Fuck planning, just fucking write.

how do you approach introducing a character's superpower(s)?
like say if one character has multiple superpowers, if I dump the whole list in the beginning, it will be obviously bad, expository and lack surprises
but if I introduce a superpower one by one when the situation calls for it, readers probably will accuse of asspull and such

>don't write for 7 straight days
>chuck as much coffee as my heart can take today
>suddenly crap out 3.6k words and counting just today.
>might even be able to finish it in the next 2 hours or so
We WILL make it bros. Also, I was dying like a motherfucker today because of coffee consumption. Please drink responsibly.

>>18226135
Introduce the strongest/useful ones first, the weaker/situational ones later.

>>18226135
You can just hint some bits of the power in mundane circumstances. Also there is always the attitude of the character. If they remain relaxed or even playful in a situation that would make most panic, I assume they have something up their sleeve, or some serious brain damage.

>>18226135
I develop them over the course of the story, for the last third, and make them sparse.
I mean, being able to do subtle things at a cost that matters to the character is better than just using superpowers left and right, it'll look cheap.

>>18226135
It will be pants-over-head retarded no matter what you do

I've been convinced by people who have read it to abandon my current project completely, as it cannot be fixed.
What a wonderful waste of time the last few months have been. Please tell me you guys are doing good.

>>18226559
It wasn't a waste of time if you learned something from it, frogposter-chan.

>Please tell me you guys are doing good.
Yeah, about that... I'm going through
queryletter.com/post/161-examples-of-successful-query-letters-from-famous-authors

And boy oh boy. With majority of these I struggle to get why the agents were interested. My tastes aren't even some contrarian 4chains shit and I feel I'm pretty open to view ideas as objectively as possible ... and most of these still sound so damn dull.

>>18226586
>you learned something
I learned that what I did was of no interest to anyone. Nothing to help me do better.

>>18226623
But WHY wasn't it? What parts didn't they like and what were the reasons? How do you feel yourself about your work?

>>18226650
They told me the concept and subject matter is in and of itself uninteresting and cannot be made interesting, they told me to kill my darlings and move on to something else.
>How do you feel yourself
I thought I was being genuine and pouring a lot out on to the page. The fact that nobody cares shows there's nothing worthwhile inside me.
Writing power-fantasy isekai for Royal Road might be a better choice for me than trying for actual literature.

>>18226926
>They told me the concept and subject matter is in and of itself uninteresting and cannot be made interesting
That's quite the statement. I can't even picture a concept that's inherently uninteresting aside of "bored young man meanders through life without purpose" shit. What is it? Maybe it's simply something totally out of their interest range?

Take 50 Shades, I wouldn't be interesting in some plain girl hooking up with a billionaire either, unless she's planning to scam or expose him, but people still love it. Maybe your readers just weren't the right audience?
>I thought I was being genuine and pouring a lot out on to the page.
That's pretty meaningless though. Do you actually enjoy reading it?

>>18226926
>They told me the concept and subject matter is in and of itself uninteresting and cannot be made interesting
Fuck them. Any concept can be made into an interesting story, it's mostly down to execution.
>prose
>characters
>setting
are the most important things to consider, narrative and plot are important also but shouldn't overshadow your characters. Make it work anon. If you want a second opinion, maybe post an excerpt here. I can find positives in everything.

>>18226958
>What is it? Maybe it's simply something totally out of their interest range?
It's more that it's something they've all been through. I had thought this would make it relatable rather than uninteresting but I was wrong, my entire target audience has just dissipated.
>Do you actually enjoy reading it?
Of course I do but it's mine, my opinion is not valid here.
>>18226959
>maybe post an excerpt here.
I can't, it's not in English.

>>18226926
It's always possible that their assessment is inaccurate. The best way to learn your shortcomings is to put yourself out there and write for complete strangers looking to read, they don't have the benefit or hindrance of knowing you and will judge your work unbiased. If your work is truly bad, then that's something you have to accept as well.

>>18226980
>The best way to learn your shortcomings is to put yourself out there and write for complete strangers looking to read, they don't have the benefit or hindrance of knowing you and will judge your work unbiased
That is what I did.
> If your work is truly bad
This is what I discovered.

>>18226978
>I had thought this would make it relatable rather than uninteresting but I was wrong
It just depends. As a poorfag I find poorfag characters more relatable but wouldn't necessary want to read a book about poorfags being poorfags. Others might find it amazing and finally feel seen.

>>18226978
>I can't, it's not in English.
Then it might be something the culture of your country disagrees with. Doesn't mind you wouldn't have an audience else where.

>>18226978
I want to see the manuscript. Give us a link.

>>18226978
What language is it in?

>>18227000
>Then it might be something the culture of your country disagrees with
No it's something majority of the male population is legally required to go through (military service). The feedback I got from several people was that nobody wants to read about this specific topic.
There were other smaller problems that I can deal with in editing but no level of editing can change the fact that the book is about something people don't want to read about.
>>18227003
No.
>>18227007
Finnish.

>>18227009
>The feedback I got from several people was that nobody wants to read about this specific topic.
Hm, they might have a point. From what I read there is still massive support in Finnland over this shit despite it being a pretty progressive country.

Though it just being unlucky with the market than anything being wrong with the topic. You're basically writing about how anti-semitism isn't cool in 1942 Germany.

>>18227042
>You're basically writing about how anti-semitism isn't cool in 1942 Germany.
What? Where are you getting all that from? Nothing about my story is opposed to the service, the reason I'm writing about it is because everyone has funny stories to tell about their time, including me.
Yet nobody wants to READ about it.

>>18227049
But then it's less about the military service and more about "funny stories" and lives on dies on the stories themselves. Only problem is the lack of stakes.

>>18227084
>But then it's less about the military service and more about "funny stories"
No it's about military service. Funny stories take place during the narrative but they're not the whole narrative.
>the lack of stakes
There's nothing that can be done about that at this point, so the only thing to do is abandon it and drink until I forget the shame.

>>18226586
Some of those were so boring I could hardly read them. Guess there really is no accounting for taste. I know it's reddit but the pubtips subreddit is quite interesting and semi-helpful for that kind of thing.

>>18227009
>>18226926
fucking lmao I told you the exact same thing here months ago and you just meme'd about it. You could've saved a lot of effort had you listened then, instead of being a dick about it

>>18227009
I'm guessing you're the same guy who posted a month or so ago?

>>18227100
And keep in mind, these are the successful ones, so some of the very best of the best according to the industry. Who knows how badly the stuff they ignored sucked.
>pubtips subreddit is quite interesting and semi-helpful for that kind of thing
Might be my next step after I'm done with these, thanks, anon.
>>18227126
Finnish sure looks scary.

>>18224766
That's pretty good, anon. There looks to be a few minor grammatical errors, redundancies, and the second paragraph is offputting without the context given by the third, but overall it looks to be a fun, promising read. As for taking forever to write, I would advise to "just write". I've found that recklessly writing a chapter or two in a single session, analysing the results, and then redoing it from scratch is far faster than agonising over every line. That is, of course, assuming your issue is with getting words on paper and not plotting out the story (although I find the aforementioned method to be helpful there, too).

>>18227098
>There's nothing that can be done about that at this point
Just build some tension up between the characters and have some tense scenes.

>>18220824
>I try to do both
Huh? How can you try to be contemporary? Everything you ever do is contemporary.

The better I am, the more I feel like
>just write and read more
is the best reply to every writing question.

>>18227252
It is no matter how good you are, but you can still point out mistakes.

>>18227106
Fuck you the meme was funny while it lasted

>>18227252
This is the answer to pretty much everything. Want to get better at something? Do it more. Talent plays a role, but I believe it only matters at each end of the skill spectrum. Talented people will pick something up more quickly at the start of their journey. If they ever do the thing long enough to reach the asymptotic far end of the skill spectrum, talent will again distinguish them from their similarly experienced peers. But it all comes down to seat time. This has been reflected over and over in so many different and completely unrelated fields that it could be taken as a given at this point.

>>18227526
True to an extent, but guided doing will help a ton more than doing it blindly, when I was learning how to draw I followed the "just draw" meme and spent years not making any progress, then I picked up two books and improved a hundredfold basically overnight, if I had just done that at the start I wouldn't have wasted so much time not making any progress. There is an existing pool of human knowledge out there on every skill and not using it is thinking you can figure out things on your own, that the masters took lifetimes to figure out and build on each other.

>>18227546
>'practice makes perfect, but perfect practice works faster'
you are correct, but you would not have made the same progress just as quickly had you started with those two books, because you spent years developing other mechanical or otherwise tangentially related skills which all clicked into place once you knew how the pieces were supposed to fit together. knowing how it all fits together from the start might help with efficiently spending your time, but no amount of guidance will replace the necessity of investing stupid amounts of time to your craft if you wish to become a master.

also, what are those two books? asking for a friend

>>18227642
Perspective Made Easy and Vilppu's Drawing Manual, followed by Vilppu's Renaissance Drawing video course

>>18227252
these are the tools that build skill, sensibilities and intuition
if you just retard write without thinking about what you're doing you'll get less gains then someone who is both writing/reading a lot and also being critical about it
anime will make you a better writer but going full anime will just make you stagnate and eat all your time

secondary material on writing will give you the conclusions of people who have written/read a lot but you will likely not be able to interpret them as a complete beginner
read/write a lot and when your own opinions and conclusions are forming refer to secondary material to compare and further develop your own ideas

tl;dr just write/read

>readers expect everything to tie into the greater story arc and the conclusion in some way
>doing so makes the world feel small and artificial

How to find the balance? I'm guilty of it myself, if my time is being "wasted" on being shown something, I expect it to be relevant, but I'll also complain if every single notable thing about the story somehow coincided into being relevant.

What is the easiest, most basic-bitch thing a person could write? A detective novel maybe?

>>18227960
Some self-insert crap. Probably slice of life shit where nothing happens but the protagonist talks about how he views the world.

>>18227960
It certainly is a shitty genre filled with tropes.

>>18227990
I already tried that and it didn't work.
>>18227992
Yeah, and consistently popular.

>>18227960
Romance or power fantasy in many of its forms.

Chapter Eleven is out.

https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/37998/wish-mountain/chapter/679136/chapter-eleven

>>18227960

Thriller.
Also shaving the mutton chops is one of the only completely forgivable reasons to save scum.

>>18228098
I shaved and I will stick by it, disco is dead and so am I.

>>18227908
characters > plot every. single. time.
if it relates to a character, it works. If it's unrelated to anything or anybody, write it as a spinoff, Silmarilion style.
And if it's world building, just sprinkle it into your prose, ez.

>set out to have a wholesome romance sideplot in my story as respite from all the subversion in fiction lately
>keep wanting to derail it into cheap "will they won't they" relationship drama where no one ends up happy

What the fuck is happening to me

>>18228483
>make them will
>then make them drift apart for won't
Ez

Hey guys,
I am a Kraut and want to write some fiction in English. I have some experience in technical writing in English, but I feel like I need some help with sentence structure/phrasing. I suspect that some/many of my sentences look like Kraut translated to English.
Does anyone have any material on phrasing/sentence order for more complex sentences?
Thank you

>>18228483
I couldn't imagine doing that. You'd have to write in such a convoluted way it would make me sick, unless of course you're writing comedy.

>>18228533
Just read more books, Hans.

Can someone give me good examples of 1 vs. 1 or 1 vs. many fight scenes?
I've obviously seen a ton of fights in animation, movies, comics, etc. but I have very little experience actually writing (or for that matter, reading) one.
I do want to capture the technical elements of a fight (i.e. it's not just I used big move = I win) but I also want it to be engaging.
Any help is appreciated.

>>18228598
Come back when you've read the entirety of Black Library content.
Now fuck off.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZZzND0SfGQ
I'm just new and looking into writing, This disgusts me and I feel a moral compunction to write stories for kids that is free of this woke bullshit. They need stuff free of this brainwashing.

>>18228627
based children's book author

>>18228610
Just to check, you're talking about Warhammer, yes?

>>18220859
>Farooq
Well that just fucked up my Orangutan named Far-ook

>>18228627
>you see so many different people, of different skin colors, sexualities, genders, mental illnesses, and disabilities

I want to understand what fictional world this girl lives in. I live in a very diverse place (race wise) and there's still a limit to how diverse people look. Most people still fit pretty squarely into one race or another. And even then, the vast majority of people are straight, don't have prominent mental illnesses or disabilities, and aren't trans.

>>18228665
Yes.

>>18228598
There's a good fight sequence in Princess Bride between Westley and Inigo.

>>18228627
Why do you watch videos that make you angry? You can probably tell just from the title it's going to make you angry. I can tell from the title that it's not anything I am going to enjoy watching, so I'm not going to watch it. Being angry is tiring, I'd rather spend my energy on things that are enjoyable or productive. Writing out this advice to you is a better use of my time than watching that video, even if you decide to ignore it.

>>18228598
I heard in the novelization of ep6 the luke vader fight was well-done.

>>18228754
He’s just baiting us, don’t respond to him.

Everything I don't like is bait.

>>18228931
: the story of the sad master angler

>>18227009
>Finnish.
my main character was born in finland

Where are all you boys and girls on this graph? I am at the "There's more to this than I thought" point. I guess this pertains to writing, but you can apply it to any lit-based skill you are developing (like learning a language)

>>18229106
i don't think this really applies to writing. writing has a linear learning curve, in the longer you write the more apparent it becomes that the solution to all your problems is to just write.

>>18229106
Sometimes huh? when going into very slight brushing on sci-fi technology. Otherwise... yeah, handwave galore most of the time. I just write and continue forward.

How do I stop pussying out of giving my characters bad endings and pull the fucking trigger?

>>18229305
Depends. If you write a story about war, or a similarly dangerous situation then it makes sense, if not, then what's the point even? Tragedy is tragedy, there doesn't need to be death in every story.

>>18220598
Tense question, appreciate any help.
>Here she cut through the dust. In staggering steps, in a crawl on all fours, she moved through the waste.
>The desert is ancient. Here and there a sapling emerged, or a new creek wound through the dirt, or a pure snowfall desaturated the terrain, but you will never find a fresh desert. A land denuded into a landscape extraordinary in simplicity. Plains. Dunes. Or, a landscape extraordinary in complexity. Hoodoos, arches, soaring yardangs. Never facile. It strives, it yearns to make living impossible. By nature and definition the desert is parched, depriving any unfortunate inhabitants of that which is essential for life, and flooding them with that which is harmful.

So the story is third person past tense, this is rough draft my introduction. The second paragraph is clearly full of present tense, but changing it to past doesn't make sense to me. (The desert WAS ancient(?)/ It strove, it yearned to make living impossible(?)) When I'm trying to express general statements of the nature of the desert, shouldn't it be present tense? I can't quite figure it out, thanks for any help.

>>18229106
I'm between "Trust me it's complicated" and "I know everything" and "There's more to this than I thought" which means I'm nearly 100% at the "I know everything" peak. I've only been writing for a decade.

>>18229353
I have no idea what the fuck is happening.
Maybe I'd have an easier time correcting it if it wasn't such a mess. It's a desert apparently but holy shit that is one pained as fuck description. You don't just use the drag tool to comma place features onto your terrain, this isn't Unity3D. Tell me what it looks like.
But hey maybe I'm just poetically challenged and this is the next nobel prize.

>>18228788
I wasn't
>>18228754
I dunno, I had to start somewhere and I ended up at some self publishing school website where I was trying to learn about how you're actually supposed to start writing. I found out about scrivener from them and pirated that. got to videos like this and abandoned the place.

>>18228098
>Thriller.
Really? I want to write one but I have absolutely no clue how to do it.

>>18229106
Rich of you to assume I could tell how little or much I understand.

>>18229472
and by how to start writing I meant like, what the process is for outlining a book and stuff and what the fuck em dashes are and stuff. I've got it worked out now.

>>18228025
>He responds to your comments.

>>18229582
>he gets comments

>>18229388
I'm pulling two paragraphs out of an into and asked a specific question about tense. I'm sure it needs to improve but also don't think it's that fucking beyond comprehension, friend.

>>18229597
>he gets views

>>18229645
>>18229597
I don't get it

>>18229597
>>18229645
He just posted his work on here and i followed. You game fellas?

>>18229612
Not really a question about comprehension. It's about clarity. Unless the character in that scene is completely dehydrated and confused, it just seems, bad.
And present tense works if you fit it in a contained piece of exposition, but it's rare. You would usually keep it in past tense if you want to integrate it well.
And don't mix both.
>Here and there a sapling emerged
This shit doesn't fit in the present tense part. Instead
>Saplings emerge in places, a new creek winds through the dirt...
Basically keep it consistent, there's no excuse not to, it's just a plain mistake.

>>18229710
Thanks, anon. The saplings sentence was originally present tense and I started changing it to past to match, but felt off, hence the post, appreciate it.

Chapter 29 released.
https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/40361/erased

>>18229597
>>18229645
>>18229888
Coincidence?

>>18229106
Don't mind me and my gigantic fucking brain.

>>18229888
Added to read later.

>>18229981
This laugh is just what I needed today. My spirits are lifted. Cheers.

>>18229931
based

>>18229888
Nice. I’ll read it later.

What's your MC's greatest flaw?

Seems like such a fundamental thing but I can't tell whether it's detachment, impulsiveness, ambition, overconfidence or rather principles, and a worry that the average reader will see a mix of the stuff and potential contradictions as an issue.

>>18230827
Protag: she's young and inexperienced as an officer. Later on she fights for a government that seemingly resists her and is never acknowledged for her actions for the most part.
Deuteragonist: She can't ever let go of the past, and it weighs on her decision-making for better or worst.
Trigagonist: Haven't gotten to their character arc just yet. She faces difficult decisions and despite their desire for peace hunger for a opponent that gives her a reason to do what she does.

Rate my first draft of the beginning of a short story.

>>18230908
beefcake paragraphs.

>>18230827
My MC has a big host of problems, but the main thing is that he feels the need to betray people constantly. He wants to be a schemer type, but he's really just a hurt kid with PTSD trying to be someone important. This adds up on his conscience and eventually leads to him having a mental break, during which his advisor takes advantage of it and usurps him.

>>18230908
The opening is confusing. We have a plain that's green, facing a forest that's not green quite yet. Then there's another green (the forest's or the plain's?) and it feels a bit inelegant.

I don't like the 'blue canvas' - Canvasses are scratchy and tough, so what are clouds doing breaking it up? Breaking it up into what?

Begins rather than began, I think.

I like your food passage; maybe ditch the 'to drink' because it starts to set a kind of restaurant vibe and that's not really in service of the idea. Nice assonance around 'descend' and 'bed'.

'Horns beginning in earnest' - a bit abrupt - where were they when you had your bucolic plains in the beginning? Were they there the whole time and what does that mean for the tone of your scene?

Whoosh not woosh, I think

"Having been struck in the head by a stone" yanks us out of Finnas's POV - very detached and narratorial

"Once within throwing..." - Sentence fragment

"Split in half by white and blue" - Not 'into white and blue?' And where did the red go?

Careful with your 'in earnests' - too many

I like it - it does interesting things with claustrophobia in battle.

>>18230931
dumb animeshit

>>18230827
There's nothing wrong with a character with contradicting values or characteristics, so long as:
1.) There is a satisfying explanation for your character's contradictory traits.
2.) The contradicting traits appear consistently and intentionally.
3.) Your character at some point is confronted with the fact that their actions are contradictory, and is forced to make some sort of decision.

>>18231009
Retard, people can't betray others in literature, especially genre fiction?
>calls me an animefag but not the LoGH ripoff faggot above me

You will never be Proust or Joyce or even Hemingway.

>>18230979
Thank you, that was all good critique. I also noticed I had some missing words here and there. I will respond to the comments, but know I agree wholly with them.

>The opening is confusing. We have a plain that's green, facing a forest that's not green quite yet. Then there's another green (the forest's or the plain's?) and it feels a bit inelegant.
Yes, I will probably move the "flowering patches" up to the second sentence. The "green" of the forest will be replaced with "in leaf" or "in leaves".

>I don't like the 'blue canvas' - Canvasses are scratchy and tough, so what are clouds doing breaking it up? Breaking it up into what?
I was trying not to use field again for the sky. The point I'm trying to make is that a few clouds break up a solid blue.

>Begins rather than began, I think.
I agree.

>I like your food passage; maybe ditch the 'to drink' because it starts to set a kind of restaurant vibe and that's not really in service of the idea. Nice assonance around 'descend' and 'bed'.
Yes, I felt it a bit strange to when writing.

>'Horns beginning in earnest' - a bit abrupt - where were they when you had your bucolic plains in the beginning? Were they there the whole time and what does that mean for the tone of your scene?
I wanted to leave them out of the scene describing the nature, yet I needed to explain why the line had begun to move already.

>Whoosh not woosh, I think
Yes.

>"Having been struck in the head by a stone" yanks us out of Finnas's POV - very detached and narratorial
I should probably delete this line, yes.

>"Once within throwing..." - Sentence fragment
I will replace "Once they were within..."

>"Split in half by white and blue" - Not 'into white and blue?' And where did the red go?
Your version sounds better. I was implying not all the shields had the same colour, but of course this was not clear. I will re-write.

>Careful with your 'in earnests' - too many
Yes.

How do you start ghost writing?

>>18230827
My MC's flaws develop over the story. As he fixes one flaw, a new one develops as a chain reaction from the previous and from his environment and the current stage of his life. First inferiority compared to his family, then insecurity about his relationships, then unfettered ambition, then bitterness and apathy, and around there is where my loose plans end. I have to find out where he goes next.

>>18230931
Kek, I even forgot my MC got something similar. Although it's less about betraying but being manipulative for the sake of it due trust issues (tm).
>>18231016
Think I check all of these sans
> is forced to make some sort of decision
Care to elaborate? My character is self-aware enough to know they act and think contradictory, and it causes internal conflict but they usually "resolve" it by just rolling with it until things crash down, and then keep rolling.

Do you have to have schizophrenia to write a meaning conflict between two characters with different ideals?

>>18228752
Coincidentally I just read that scene when looking for examples, and you're right, it's great. Obviously a bit diffferent from the movie version but very engaging.

>>18228767
I'll look into it, thanks

>>18231182
?? No? Just think of any time you've had a political disagreement with someone and build from there

>>18231182
Do you never have conflicting views or have matters when you have contrasting opinions on? Sure, you might lean towards one but as long you feel the other, what's the problem?

Since we're talking about character flaws, how do I write a meaningful character flaw without it disrupting the story too much?
I don't want it to be too in-your-face to the reader, but at the same time if it doesn't affect the story it's not really a flaw.

>>18231294
What do you mean with "disrupting the story too much"? The shit is supposed to have a huge effect on how the story goes. Just keep the flaw somewhat authentic.

>>18231294
I get what you're saying. I'm writing something at the moment and while it would be interesting to explore a flaw, it would also take the story on a pretty wide tangent.
In the end I decided for a half-measure. To highlight the flaw but not indulge in it, it still does the job pretty well.

>don't have the talent to make people like your writings
>don't want to cater to the mass to make a living
what's the point?

>>18231294
The character flaw should have a big effect on the story. In a tragedy, it should bring about the protagonist's loss at the end. In an ordinary hero's journey, the protagonist should succumb to it toward the middle and recover from it later on.

Literary fiction fags ITT are cringe retards who want to ape "the classics". Genre fiction chads dominate the thread and contribute the most.

>>18231371
J-just wait until I finish with my artistic rendition of my character masturbating! It's an allegory for Brexit!

>>18230908
the only thing i want to comment on here is that you have a habit of using a comma before a dependent clause which isn't necessarily grammatically incorrect (even without an adverb of concession, depending on who you ask) but it ought to only be used for emphasis. but you use it constantly,
>it was a green and lovely land, with rolling hills that were met [...]
>The sky was clear, with only [...]
>In the evening they would return home, just as [...]
>The children would come in from playing, and after [...]
etc, etc. in fact basically all of your sentences take one of three different basic forms. this isn't a bad starting place but i would suggest reading more and writing down the sentence structures that you like, and mimicking them

>>18231099
>it causes internal conflict but they usually "resolve" it by just rolling with it
The contradiction doesn't cause the conflict, the contradiction IS the conflict.
I'm guessing you already realize this by your use of quotation marks, but this really isn't a resolution at all.

>>18231427
Not every story needs to address the contradiction of a character. It can just be something that lives in the background without great apotheosis. Flaws and complexity makes characters more interesting.

>>18231473
Fair point, I was projecting a bit.
I'm in the middle of writing a story where the character's indecision between two conflicting core principles is the main source of drama.

>>18231427
It seems tricky due the flaws in question; the character can shrug off the consequences of any mistake. Sure, for the big ones there will be some angsting and need to fix the stuff but the internal conflict is more prominent when it comes to making the choice; they don't dwell on the outcome too much and generally don't have the time to.

Is this real or are reporters writing fiction? It seems like something out of Star Trek

https://nypost.com/2021/05/11/us-officials-suspect-russian-spy-unit-behind-directed-energy-attacks/

It's 6 am
I was writing the whole night like a degenerate and I feel like shit
Please kill me

>>18229888
Just read your first chapter, it has nice dialogue. It really flows nice. Except the repetition of "said x" you could use: respond, comment or even better use descriptions of activities.

But I feel lost in between the rapid dialogue. There is seemingly no time to establish scene nor character which is kind of a shame. It reads like a play where the scene is established in an off stage text. I would love more prose, frankly.

Also the blurb (the description of the story) is way to vague. I still don't know what this story is all about. A failed heist?

I'm adding this to my reading list though. I like the writing all in all.

>>18231723
Writing all night is a sign of true commitment to your craft. If you got some work done, be proud of it.

>>18231801
No, that shit is detrimental, never do that.

>>18230908
Bit confusing in the opening, might want to change that.

>>18230827
She’s extremely anti-social.

>>18229305
By just doing it? Stop being such a pussy?

>>18231723
It's almost 7 am.
I was was trying to write a draft for a query the whole night and a good part of the day before. Still feel alright. Didn't eat since 4pm and decided I won't eat nor sleep until I finish this shit.

I'm getting more and more tempted to copy-paste previous attempts and do some minimal rewording and win against myself on a technicality.

>>18228025
It’s nice seeing your progress, have you thought of publishing your story to different websites?

>>18231875
Get some proper sleep. Staying up all night ain’t going to help you if you’re to tired.

>>18231842
If it happens once or twice a year, because you have a day off the next day and you're on a sudden streak, then so be it. Or if you can't sleep for some reason. that's fine in my opinion. I'm not endorsing it as a lifestyle, you should be in bed by eleven so that you can wake up early, twelve at the latest unless you're at a social event.

>>18231886
Has it helped? Or are you just too tired to care about what you write?

>>18231884
I don't feel too tired yet, just some sort of impotent frustration.

>>18231903
The first songs that you should sleep, you idiot. Lack of sleep makes you irritable.

>>18231897
Replied to the wrong person? I haven't stayed up all night writing for over a year. When I have in the past it's gone well, of course you get tired but you're not writing your final draft in these hours, you're getting ideas and styles on paper for you to rework in the near future. It feels really good to get a lot of work done in one go, especially if it follows a productive day. Sometimes, when you need to put pen to paper and bang out new and great ideas, losing a night's sleep is a small price to pay to keep them, rather than forget or misconstrue them the next day.

>>18231544
Seems cliche. Spice it up.

>>18231907
Pretty sure it's the complete lack of progress; and then how the 150 words required are kinda nothing, and yet I still fail to come up with the right ones. Plus the whole "I have to sell my story" aspect of the whole ordeal just kicks me in the dick. I wouldn't mind being stuck writing an actual chapter nearly as much.

>>18231923
Have you reviews your work after a good sleep? I know I have and came to hate what I wrote when staying up.

New thread
>>18231931

>>18231928
NTA but I tend to love the stuff written during these times the most. It feels a lot more surprising and honest.

>>18231928
It's mostly spelling mistakes and grammatical issues I come across during reworks. It's the concepts which stick, they're taken and turned into something better. Like I said, don't try to write your final draft or anything similar when sleep deprived. Only try to develop new ideas and styles to add to your work. If it's something new that you're working on, then stay up and devise a plan for it. Don't stay up unless you've got a sudden burst of creativity, only do it if you need to get new ideas out so that you don't forget them come morning.

>>18220774
Go to Reddit and make a post like "FINALLY after years of work, busting my butt and serving tables, I'm a PUBLISHED AUTHOR!!!!" and post a pic of you holding your book, just don't mention that by "published author" you mean you are self-publishing on amazon.

>>18220774
This isn't a joke, if you are actually good you can make decent money doing freelance romance/smut novel writing. I used to pay bills in college as a freelance writer /novelist and those always had the most steady and best paying gigs. Just be prepared to never get credit, not that you'd want it most likely

>>18220598
why do I default to writing sentences in the passive voice, how do I stop doing it?

>>18229003
Tell us more.