/lit/ - Literature

>>17936427
There's a part in Brief Interviews with Hideous Men where a guy is talking about how he's still in love with his gf from like 8 or so years ago. When I read that I thought that sounded ridiculous. Now I'm on the same boat.

>>17936427
You think it's possible for guys to get baby fever?

My favourite delusion , is that there's a marble in my skull and to dislodge it from blocking my spine, I occasionally shake my head.

Drinking is so pointless and yet like clockwork here I go still doing it.

My betta fish is so beautiful, and I love him so dearly. Every time I look at him, I think, "Surely God must truly be benevolent and magnificent, if he allowed such a tiny, perfect creature to not only exist but also to share in my life journey with me, so that I may feed it and care for it and look at it whenever I like." Get a nice fishe yourselves, bros, and it will bring you so much inspiration.

>>17936551
No. It will go away.

>>17936887
That's a good idea. I feel bummed out that I can't have cats or dogs where I live, but I suppose anyone could get away with keeping a fish.

I don’t want to work anymore.

not unlikely a woman i was.. I don't know what I was- infatuated with? killed herself or is killing herself on the far side of the globe roughly now. we met a while back, my only link to her now was through facebook, and I think she removed her account or blocked me. She liked a thing I uploaded not long ago, and now it just says someone liked it, I don't know if that means the account still exists but I'm blocked. She talked to me about suicide. I'm.. not that sad. She might be alive, there is some indication she is not. We're trying to get in touch with her sister. A little shocked I guess. I said something stupid to her a while back, and though I appologized very thoroughly she never wrote back again.

I was useless to her, and she did ask me for help. I was useless because of desire, I could not put aside my desire for her and just be there for her. There was a dynamic developing between us where I was to be the strong rock for her, and for a long time I thought that was what I wanted to be. But when it came to it I was gripped with a fear that we could become a couple where I always had to be strong for her. I was in a relationship like that, and it was an absolute disaster, it was harmful. I'm not strong all the time, certainly not, and I needed reciprocity. So I was useless because I worried we were setting an untenable precedent. She was useless to me too. I could not just be her friend.

She is both a wise and a thoroghly stupid person. I am too. I'm trying to think what I could have done differently. What really comes up is I could have guarded myself from falling for her. I also could possibly have fallen for her without being gripped by desire. I don't know if that's possible. But my having given in, at some point, to desire- I believe this is more or less my fault, whenever it happened, and that it is what made me useless. When she came to me for support I should have been able to put my feelings aside. I told her I could only speak to her as a prospective partner, I couldn't be her friend, my feelings were eating me up. And they were. She basically replied that she expected she was going to klil herself. It wasn't a good situation. She must have been desperate. I was just very fearful of starting something that would lead to us one day having children based on an unsound foundation. But that shouldn't have been my focus then.

I don't know if she is alive or not. Sometimes I'm the kind of person who doesn't really have reactions to things like this. I worry I will have to fake sorrow. But I am moved. We'll have to see.

>>17936934
The pet I always recommend to people who can't have cats or dogs is a rat. They're essentially tiny dogs, same level of intelligence and loyalty but in a much easier package. But also there's something very special about fish, because you're not just taking care of the fish, you're creating an entire mini ecosystem and you are its demiurge. There's something character-building about having something rely on you so purely and completely.
Here he is by the way, his name is Raskolnikov, I also have an assassin snail named Mishima in there.

>>17937073
Very pretty, thanks for the idea.

>>17936427
in4 this is deleted too by those cocksucking jannies and mods

Politicians should reinstate bathing culture.
It would force younger generations to socialize in a much more private way.
It would also make them more self-conscious about their body/health too. Or make them more vocal, about the unhealthiness of their friends, since no one wants to wash a fat, grease neckbeard, but said neckbeard would also feel more self-conscious about His own body, if He would be washed by healthier people, especially if the healthier person has a muscular body.
It would be also a great way to make new friends/familiars, since everyone (or most people of the same class) will be in the same bathhouse, they will meet each other more often, overhear the conversation of familiar faces, which will make people want to join the conversation.

>tldr: my gay fantasies

After walking around aimlessly in the city I was stopped by a very cute emo/tomboy girl. Totally my type. Naive as I am, I thought for a second that she was interested in me. haha. haha ha.
She actually just wanted me to sign up for some globo homo charity shit, helping poor children in africa and all that jazz. You know what I did? I fucking signed up for 10€ a month. Why? Because I'm a pathetic loser desperate for female attention.
Well, at least it was nice to get to know somebody in this anonymous big city who's not a homeless. In this busy town all types of human scum get out of their way to fuck with you. She was a pearl among the trash pile. And here I am isolated in my dorm again. Fuck.

>>17937172
I really want to go to my city's historic public bathhouse. Not to do gay or coomer shit of any kind, literally just to have a bath in a comfy historic setting and get a sense of how it was back in the day. But I'm scared that the moment I dip my big toe in there I'll get aids and hepatitis, or that nasty faggot coomers will hit on me.

>>17936994
Wagie wagie get in cagie.

>>17937193
Damn, anon get a grip. You're just minutes away from subscribing to some thots onlyfans or donating on twitch.

>>17937113
Why was the previous even deleted?

>>17937193
You absolutely deserve your lack of female attention

Their lives depend on the system. If you speak against the system, that's like chopping at their roots. They will mindlessly defend their foundation at all costs. As long as they are dependent on the system they will always be an enemy to those that whish to fundamentally change the system.

>>17937437
who you finna organise then? the mexicans?

I wanted to get first division by the end of my master's but it's not gonna happen now. Life really kicked me in the balls during the process.
How the fuck do some people over come ridiculous obstacles in life and not lose their nerves?

>>17937437

>>17937193
Where are you from and which city in Germany are you in.

A couple hours ago I was driving through the forest in the dark to get home when I saw a large black blur on the side of the road which was not illuminated by my head lights. I only saw it for a few brief seconds but it appeared to turn and move away from me as I passed it and a few seconds later I saw a large deer on the opposite side of the road that appeared to be running away from the black blur. The blur would have been eight foot high and six foot wide and looked like a large oval I only noticed it because it did not illuminate.

I'm not sure what it was but it has left me puzzled and now I have no motivation to continue reading.

>>17937455
The system has to eat itself. If you move against the system, it becomes stronger because external threats strengthen internal bonds. The people running things are not held together by great love, but ny mutual benefit. As soon as they stop being useful to each other, they will turn against one another. Doing nothing and letting everything dissolve is really the only option.

It's like a Chinese finger trap. If you pull out, in the direction you want to go to escape, the trap grasps your fingers even harder. To escape, one must push further into the trap. Accelerate.

>>17937389
I avoid both like the plague
I hope I won't actually end up like that
>>17937492
I'm originally from Dresden but I just moved to Frankfurt for uni.

>>17937193
Look, just because you like Kaiji the show doesn't mean you have to act like Kaiji the guy.

>>17937559
Then you should know that you never get approach in the street without them wanting something from you lol. Also Frankfurt is a shitty plastic city full of cocaine.

>>17936887
I had a beta fish when I was young and after a while I got tired of taking care of it. I let it die. I let it die on purpose.

Who thought the wasted life of that fish could sit so heavily on one's shoulders? I'll never forgive myself.

>>17936427
Angel of death flying free.

>>17937601
I was like Kaiji way before I even knew about his existence. Kaiji is a spot on character study for a lot of young men nowadays I think

Why do i have these doubts about everything? Why cant i be normal?

The first girl I ever talked to left me because I told her psychology exists to placate adult males into being good little sheep, which she took great offense to and demanded an apology (which I refused to do so). I don't feel bad about it now but I probably will later.

>>17937628
While what you did was wrong, the fact that you feel guilty about it shows that you've grown from that and will never treat a living creature under your care like this again. Raskolnikov symbolically forgives you.

Latin is ruining my life. To whoever study it for fun, please know that doing that Uni is totally a different thing. Here's everything so hardcore, necabo sese probabiliter

>it’s fine as long as no one gets hurt
>do what you want as long as it doesn’t harm anyone :)
>it doesn’t matter what two consenting adults do behind closed doors

Are these the most overused platitudes of our time? In the beginning it didn’t really bother me but after hearing them for the billionth time I feel like ramming feces down the person’s throat

>>17937901
It's just libertarian bugspeak.

>>17937901
>What does it matter?
Is my favorite one.

>>17937901
Core of modern ethics.

>>17936427
Is loneliness a good reason to kms? I've never had a single friend and I can't take it anymore

>>17937901
>>17937939
I have a friend who became a hard core muslim when he was in his mid-teens. he's lightened up by now. But I gotta tell you I think he is a living proof that it does matter. He is what human innocence could be, he really guarded his heart form corruption and it really shows.

>>17937901
it's ok to be angry about it as long as you don't hurt anyone anon :)

>>17937947
you gotta figure out a way to meet people. just poped into my head- did you ever consider singing in a choir? you really don't have to be good, the voices kind of drown eachother out and it's a way to do sometihng with people without being so directly personal

>>17937947
Sign up to the roll20 website and start playing tabletop games.
DnD, military strategy, find one you like and go to some game evenings.

>>17937437
>>17937527
marxoid cope

>>17938029
>Sign up to the roll20 website and start playing tabletop games.
eh only if you have friends. playing with randoms is a waste of time, and everyone on /tg/ is a pozzed tranny faggot.

>>17938053
If that's true for /tg/ it's just as true for /lit/

>>17937901
What is the problem with this way of thinking?

>>17938065
Not really. I get banned for saying 'nigger' on /tg/ and other such politically incorrect jargon. The entire board kneels to Discord trannies and Redditors.

>>17937901
Isn't this just the On Liberty mindset? Do you live in the US?

>>17937193
>She was a pearl among the trash pile
She pegged you for a mark, and she was right. And now you're praising her for it. Get your shit together, man

>>17938072
Little wannabe tyrants get mad when they can't impose their own ethical views on everyone else

>>17938072
not him but you can believe there is a problem or not believe there is a problem, that's up to you as far as I gather. but the idea is basically that some choices have consequences that go further than the immediate act, and that this is really a core thing in all old world morality which the west kind of forgot what with "God dying" and all. like having an onlyfans is fine if you only believe in the flesh, but that way you will never actually know true life. I'm pretty sure all religious traditions would agree on this, God knows best though. So this "innocent" "live and let live" could in fact be quite harmful, but it is very attractive as is evidenced by the volume of hte modern left. the only question is if its attraction is actually sound.

>>17938092
I know, I know... can a dude dream though?

>>17938112
I would advise against it

>>17938107
>but that way you will never actually know true life
Knew it would be some stupid christian bullshit like this

>>17938072
We're more than animals, and that way of thinking denies it. There are higher callings than the satisfaction of desires.

Is it normal to be hesitant of dating/marrying a girl who intellectually intimidates you and seems more accomplished and likely to earn more than me? I have a great connection with her but she's more impressive than me in every way (attends Harvard, has spoken at multiple conferences, actually reads things other than YA).

Is this what normalfags call "toxic masculinity" or something?

>>17938138
I'm absolutely convinced it's true, I'm this guy >>17937968
but you can take it or leave it

The only thing that bothers me more than the looks of confusion and derision I get when I go for long walks through the neighborhoods in the suburbs of my rural college town, is that I also feel somewhat ashamed and embarrassed over the fact that I’m even here in the first place.

>>17938143
It’s normal. I don’t know if it’s the right choice. I didn’t date a girl I got along with really and knew for a long time because she became a doctor and made like 2-3x as much money as me. We’ve had an off and on again crush thing going on for like 8 years now.

>>17938143
maybe you can wear the pants in other ways. It seems somewhat appealing to me to have a wife who teaches me a bunch of cool stuff, but on some gut level I get where you're coming from

>>17938139
>We're more than animals, and that way of thinking denies it
Does it really? "If it doesn't harm anyone it's fine" is just a slightly different formulation of "do unto others."

I hate who I am so much. If I read my books own biography I would think “I can’t fucking relate to this loser”.

What a sorry fag I am.

>>17938072
When there’s no standards whatsoever then everything goes to shit. That kind of thinking is prevalent because they fear the resurgence of people who can impose order onto them and end their tranny orgy. Also it’s based on a lie - these actions have an impact on society that everyone is forced to live with. It doesn’t end at their bedroom door.

>>17938143
>Is it normal to be hesitant of dating/marrying a girl who intellectually intimidates you
All you need to find is a single weak point and they'll fall apart when they don't have years' worth of college propaganda shoved into their brains to fall back on. Intellectualism in women is literally a non-factor.

>>17938179
"Cause no harm" is definitely a standard though

>>17938194
>woman is accomplished and intelligent
>you gotta break her bro
Misery will follow you and you will deserve every second of it

>>17938211
the idea is that the harm is all stored in secondary consequences, like normalising promiscuity for instance

>>17938249
You see these far-reaching consequences in a crystal ball or something?

the most beautiful word in the world you ask? it is simply

"oy" in yiddisch

no other word has such a wealth and width of humanity.

>>17938224
>Misery will follow you and you will deserve every second of it
Sorry I got out of a relationship on a bad note.

>>17938211
Not when it’s done in the passive sense. It requires absolutely nothing of you

>>17938270
I mean I reckon these things have at least arisen together since the 60s.

>>17938276
It will continue happening unless you take a less adversarial approach to your relationships

>>17938293
On the contrary, she was the one quite intent on being adversarial and trying to cement my position as the good little boy that nods her head in agreement towards everything she says.

>>17938287
Why should I care what you reckon? I reckon you're just another doomsayer looking for something to whine about

>>17938304
>good little boy that nods her head in agreement towards everything she says.
This is the worst. I have no sympathy for men who do that just to get some.

>>17938304
Listen man all I'm saying is that you shouldn't think it's a good idea to prey upon weaknesses in your partners. It's wrong no matter who does it, for whatever reason, and in the long-term only produces bad results

>>17938249
Are you one of these Christian larp retards? Go away.

>>17938314
well, I don't know if I typed this to you or someone else, but why do you think literally every religious tradition alive has sexual morality?

>>17938324
Yeah she really bared out her true colors to me.
>>17938334
No you're right. I don't know why I said what I did, my worldview is easily affected by negative experiences.

>>17938169
Do unto others is not the whole of higher teachings

>>17938270
>everything is fine

>>17938515
Yes

why does it feel insincere to write about things pertaining to the internet, computers, etcetera?
writing the words 'keyboard', 'mouse', or about experiences relating to internet usage/interaction with technology comes with a feeling of unease or discomfort, as if these lack the same authenticity of things like 'fork', 'table', 'fishing'

Im having trouble throwing trash away because i fear it might be sentient, but unable to communicate with me. Two days ago i accidentally broke a glass jar, and all i could do was imagine it was screaming in agony but with me being unable to hear it.

I’ve heard it said that alcohol is a fine replacement for a painkiller addiction. Well then, what’s the best replacement for a benzo adiction?

>>17938731
Spooks

>>17938072
Because it doesn't account for self-harm and, more often than not, serves as a justification for aggressively pushing unhealthy and addictive stuff on people based on the assumption that they'll all be able to exercise enough self-control to avoid hurting themselves. Snorting cocaine and eating three helpings of McDonald's while prolapsing your anus with a horse dildo and jerking off to loli guro won't hurt anyone other than yourself, but it absolutely will fuck up your entire life. "It's okay as long as you aren't hurting anyone else" rhetoric covers up the fact that most harmful behaviors and ideas are human inventions that don't affect people they haven't been advertised to. Transferring responsibility to the individual addict/sex pervert/victim lets the people who distribute that kind of stuff, the ones who are really causing harm, off the hook.

"I wasn't born so much as I fell out" has to be one of the greatest lines ever written

>only capable of fucking a woman
>only capable of loving a man
Well this sucks, I thought bisexuals were supposed to be gigaChads.

What to do with a bunch of cringe books I don’t want anymore.

>>17938975
Sell to a quirky 2nd hand bookstore

>>17938987
No. This is all dissident political and angsty philosophical stuff. I had a phase for like a year where I wanted to be involved with that stuff so I bought them, never read them. I don’t know what quirky book store would want this stuff.

>>17938998
Is it Mein Kampf and Turner Diaries? Then you're right. Otherwise it's all good, these stores usually carry weird shit.

>>17938998
Like what? There's ebay, but if it's stuff that might get you put on a list you can always just dump them in a recycling bin or leave them in a little free library.

>>17939008
It’s a lot of like mystical esoteric communism/fascism stuff with the Stirner and the like tossed in. I’m not even into philosophy. I don’t know why I bought this stuff.

>>17936427
You know, I've always wanted to write a book. I wanted to draw as well and make comics, but I just end up playing video games or doing something else instead. A large chunk of my life has been devoted to economically positioning myself in order to consume more products. At first I just wanted to play video games, but then I wanted to live alone and play them. This required more money and the safest way to do that was to get an education and job that provides a larger income. The effort required to do this however has distracted me from my original goal, and now I spend my time doing everything but playing video games, writing, drawing, and making comics. I sometimes wonder if I took too complex of a route towards expressing the artistic end of myself. If that's the case, I've wasted a fair chunk of my life. As I move into my third decade I have to make sure that doesn't happen again. I only get a few more of these so I better make it count.

>>17939014
i gave away all my communist books to a charity once i grew out of it. the guy who took at all was a boomer who came up in the cold war so we both had a good laugh.

>>17939018
i'm saving all those super hard crprgs from the 90s for when i retire. figure they should be good brain teasers to help keep the alzheimers slowed.

>>17939033
> giving communist books to charity
There’s something funny about this but I don’t even know what it is exactly.

But yeah, I have no idea why I wasted my money on this stuff I never even read.

>>17937172
Fuck... Is this why the Japanese are so slim? Because they still go to onsen?

How many men are competing for a woman at any given time?

> if you didn’t start writing before 25, it’s over
> if you didn’t start reading voraciously before you left college age, it’s over
No one has been able to demonstrate to me that this is incorrect yet.

>>17936427
Normies who are really into politics utterly perplex me. It is fun to shitpost about these subjects when you get to say whatever you want, but normies spend hours upon hours just rewording New York Times headlines to each other and anyone who disagrees, what on earth do they get out of this

>>17939695
Community

>>17936427
Did anybody ever follow postgraduate studies in linguistic anthropolgy (or anthrpological linguistics) ? I recently learned that it's a thing, and since it connects two of the fields that interest me the most in life i'm very curious about switching from the dead of stem to something i actually care about, but i don't know if it's really doable or not.
If anybody has any sort of knowledge or experience with this, then please help a retarded brother out. This could be my last chance at salvation.

talk me out of getting a poster of this to hang on my wall.

>>17936427
Today after reading the metamorphosis, I realize my life and situation with me and my family shares some similarities to that of Gregory Samsa, me being the retarded cockroach man who would benefit everyone by dying, also I saw a huskie with heterochromia today plus I continue developing my own idiosyncratic personal philosophy I delude myself into thinking it makes sense.

>>17939791
Don't, it's one of the most based images I have saved on my hard drive.

Idk if you're a burger, but Walmart offers pretty cheap poster printing services. Just get a big photographic enlargement and treat it like you would a poster, I think it's $8ish for something that's like 2 feet by 1 foot.

>>17939834
I am also noticing quarantine is making everyone more aggressive, and sometimes when I want to fantasize I wonder if this is where the end starts, with the unforeseen(Or not) effects of social isolation breaking society as we know it, I've been reading some shitty green texts, one caught my attention, it's picture, I don't know I just feel like the end is approaching, I don't what, or when just that it's approaching, maybe not as fast as I think it is, and maybe not as total as I think it is, but it's coming, and I am worried what will happen to me and what will happen after it.

>>17938731
It truly is terrifying to think about what lies outside our perception of the senses.

just realized lost 5-6 years of notes...reading notes, mydiarydesu, workout logs, etc.

i had been using ev*rnote for most of that time. switched to joplin and ported everything over. i upgraded my computer recently, and thought moved my stuff to my new drive... there was a joplin folder on my F: drive so i assumed that was the one that contained all my notes. but apparently it was all in C:/USER/anon/.config/Joplin not F:/Joplin

i mean im not genius so it wasn't like they were very special, but there was some good stuff in there. pretty fucking beat up right now... thats what my retarded ass gets for not using something with a sync/cloud service holy fucking shit

>>17936427
>grey folds, Cheshire grinning

>>17937901
Because they’re telling you might makes right, provided no one catches you

>>17939876
I disagree, it's very comforting.

>>17939929
Ignoring it doesn't mean it goes away, though yeah maybe ignorance is bliss.

>>17939791
there's something endearing about these guys clearly enjoying themselves while doing something so harmless and improbable
>but dude... so your ok with these poor souls imitating the men who raped their grandmothers? like seriously bro?

Confessions by Saint Augustine stirs in me some kind of faith but I'm too inclined towards doubt and paralysis to act on any of it.

Again with the unsolicited advice. . . .

>>17936427
Im an utter midwit psued. I dont read. I dont care about art or music or really anything more meaningful than sports. Frankly, none of it strikes me and im too dumb for it anyway. I come here to absorb distilled opinions of opinions of opinions so normies think im smart and well studied. Im an amplification of the various subcommunities I parasitically lurk. Confession is my only sincere gesture but i cant tell it apart from narcissism anymore. Im looking for help always, constantly

>>17939857
*Don't reconsider

Saggy wet wieners whining but never winning. I wrote this while taking a shit. I think I'm anal retentive.

I have no faith.

>>17940216
Examine your surroundings and how they effect your will. I personally have lost all hope changing peoples direction but your self awareness gives me hope that you might be able to change for the better. Good luck anon.

I fear death so much. I seek self destruction through evil habits, but I can't stand the fact that I will die. I don't know what's worse: to suffer eternally in hell or to simply cease existing. Any books about this? I'd love a take on that.

What the fuck does painted eggs have anything to do christian faith?

>>17940494
Me too. God doesnt care about me, there are more worthy people.

>>17940884
Jesus hatched from an egg. Its in Matthew 1:3-6

>>17940884
During the dark ages, Rome lost a lot of books. But they had other centres which kept libraries alive, and so could help restore the Church. The problem is that the books were left with the Irish, who put in all the fun holidays from their old religion. Hence St Patrick's Day, Easter, Hallowe'en, and all the feasts that fall on solstices.

Nigga posted up like

"Woman, I am Man. My entirety of being resides in the fulfillment of every aspect of your being, that I might be the manifestation of your desire incarnate."

And that bitch be like

"Man, I am Woman, and I accept and receive the admissions of your existence as that which is the necessary and sufficient completion of my own, unto the procreative nature of my eternal womb which I carry that we may ever find meaning in our wending throughout this torrid landscape of undulative reality."

LMAO

There is so much beauty in this world, it's too much sometimes

>>17940884
Spring, in general, is associated with Easter, not only because Spring is the season when Easter happens, but because Spring is associated with rebirth, and the renewal of the world after the death that comes in Winter. Therefore it is very natural to associate Spring, and symbols of Spring, with the Resurrection of Jesus. So the egg, a symbol of new chicks hatching in Spring, becomes a symbol of Easter. So also rabbits, a symbol of new birth and new life because of how easily they multiply, also become associated with Easter. It's really not nearly as pagan as people make it out to be.

>>17941127
Do really appreciate it?

Whenever I find myself posting on 4chan I know something's off.

>>17941150
I probably don't. To be honest it's depressing how there is so much art I'll never be able to enjoy because I'll just die eventually. Same goes for knowledge

I developed this belief about six years ago and have never told anyone because I don't think they would understand me. This is the first time I have expressed this to anyone The biggest problem facing human society is that there are too many men. That is, the gender ratio is too skewed. Most people have no idea that males and females are not born at an equal rate. It is closer to 50.5:49.5 or 51:49. Historically, this has worked out due to men dying young, either due to testosterone-fueled accidents or due to wars. But since Vietnam we have seen a long peacetime and the creation of the "indoor male," meaning less Mustang crashes, resulting in there being literally, mathematically, too many males to be able to pair with females. This problem is further exacerbated worldwide via bass-ackwards female infanticide policies in countries like India and China. As a result, the development of the incel class is not due to video games, anime, or whatever social boogeyman is the soup du jour, though they certainly haven't helped - no, it is down to cold, sheer mathematics. 51 males to 49 females means a minimum of 2 incels. 55 to 45, 10 incels. An inconvenient truth. This phenomenon becomes more pronounced when you consider people who have already paired up. Consider the extreme case of 55 men to 45 women (a reality already in parts of China) when 40 men and 40 women have already paired up. This leaves a market of 5 women for 15 men, an insane advantage state for anyone looking to find a partner. This leaves us with the unflinching reality that there must be incels, and there is nothing to do about it. The only way to escape inceldom is then to "cuck" your bretheren, casting them down into the same hell you just left.

While this state of affairs could be viewed as advantageous for women, ultimately I think both sexes suffer for it, prevented from mutually achieving greater heights. A local maximum for women.

Furthermore, I believe this phenomenon has resulted in nature "self-correcting" by introducing more open relationships and mass conversion of males to females. Which I don't care about that deeply but it's not a real solution. It's like hay fever, sneezing won't stop the pollen.

There are multiple ways to fix this problem over time, but none I have power over:

1. War
2. Voluntary/involuntary male genocide
3. Voluntary/involuntary male infanticide
4. Developing a drug that makes it considerably more likely to have female children and dumping it in the water supply

I find it hard to believe that no one else sees this as such a major problem. I think this is the cause of most gender strife and male psychological pain as well as the case of a great deal of mass shootings in the United States. But no one wants to look at the roots of the problem. Don't stop the pollen, just suffocate yourself so you can't breathe it in.

>>17938731
actual fucking schizo

>>17936427
I've been living in Japan for over one year now. I like it here, but I really do miss being back stateside. I want me neighbors to actually talk to me. I want girls to notice and talk to me. I want to not be such a socially retarded mongoloid. I know I'm not fat, but I also know I have a bad case of body dysmorphia and I can't help that my horrible self image causes me to starve myself.

>>17937193
I thought this was a copypasta shitpost at first

jesus christ dude, pull it together

>>17937193
YOU HAD TO SAVE HER NOT CODDLE HER MINDRASITES

>>17936427
Got an eviction notice yesterday. I was lucky that my mom was visiting, or I would have been a complete mess. As it is, I'm pretty calm about it now, but shit. What kind of monster gives something like that on easter? I've lived here for ten years, and I've done my very damnedest to be a good renter, or whatever. I even made sure that I didn't start my day until 8 or make noise after 10. And I've still been snubbed and treated like an invader the entire time. I'm pretty twisted up about the whole thing. Moving all my books is going to be a nightmare. This is a real bummer.

>>17941355
Where in Japan do you live anon? Are you doing ESL or what?

>>17941400
Ten years in the same place damn. I'm sorry for the bad news anon.

>>17941400
Why the eviction?

>>17936427
i like to write the word PENIS repeatedly in online game chats

>>17937492
how did you know he is from Germany?

I want to fly

>>17941404
I'm just a lonely military anon goyim. Halfway through my slave contract. I've never been more demoralized in my whole 26 years of life.

Life feels completely and utterly pointless right now. I do not want to live anymore, yet I feel compelled to live, not for myself but only for my mother. So long as she lives, I must live too, as to deprive her of her child would be tantamount to a death sentence, but fuck, I don't want to be here anymore. I love my mother too much to force her to live in misery for the rest of her life. So I choose instead to live in misery until she leaves me. I haven't felt happy in over two years. I do not find enjoyment in anything anymore. Sex is a bore. Drugs are a pointless distraction. Work is contractual, and art is work. I feel no point in this existence anymore. I wonder at times if it is merely because I am meant to feel this way, or if it is a consequence of my complacency? At waiting so long to attempt to actually live for myself for once. I just got out of gradschool and inherited an economy that is the most broken it has been in nearly a century. Work has not been kind, but I have landed a job teaching ESL in Tokyo. I fly out in a couple of months, as soon as my visa finishes processing. Not a weeb, but a part of me is excited. Always wanted to live in a big city. Japanese women are beautiful too, and I'm decent enough to pull women out of my league in my own country, so maybe I'll be lucky there too. Who knows, maybe my inner Rivers Cuomo will awaken while there and I'll find some horribly orientalists purpose to be. But I don't expect it honestly. I more expect a banal life that is colored in neon rather than the beige morass I'm used to. Perhaps the change in pallet will do me some good though. Learning the language seems like a fun challenge. Always wanted to read Mishima's Confession of a Mask in the original, so this gives me a good excuse to work towards that as a goal. Still, never learned a foreign language that's actually spoken and alive, I'm more used to languages confined to history and old books, so I presume it will add its own set of challenges that I'm not used to. Whatever happens happens I guess.

Happy easter anons

The nature of this inversion is soon complete: I now see women as heartless and emotionless perverts.

>>17941538
Happy Easter fren. Doing anything to celebrate today?

I do not get why people are so against people killing themself. I have been reading about it and everywhere I look on the internet there is place that wants to help and its super grave and serious. But my question is why do they care? There is a lot of destructive things in our society and the goverment doesn't give 2 shit and most of the time they even encourage it. Now why all of sudden for suicide they are there to help and give you love and mostly pills?
Inb4 they want to keep their tax cattle alive.
But I know I am cynical but I cannot believe that they give a single shit about their slaves.

>>17941550
Just a video call with the family. We couldnt meet because of lockdown. What about you?

>>17941412
Thanks. Everyone is telling me this is a good thing, and it's time for a change anyway. I'm trying to keep that in mind.

>>17941420
Well, officially it's because it's been signed over to a new owner, but it's all one family, and I'm 100% sure it's because they just wanted me out. Last week the owner came over with a plumber, and because I was busy doing other things, my apartment had gotten messy. It's clean now, but I'm absolutely positive it's because of that. The landlords are old and cantankerous, and don't understand what I say when I try to explain "crippling depression" to them.

I feel as though I was cucked by life.

>>17941895

>>17941557
They don't. They maintain the illusion that they care so people don't start blaming the government.

> Create an environment inhospitable to life.
> Make people depressed and suicidal.
> They say people have a mental illness.
> This transfers all blame to the individual.
> You are sick, not the system.

This is literally what it is.

old ladies calling me nice young man is like cocaine to me idk why

Vapes, tinder, bitcoin, vtubers, onlyfans, face masks, coronavirus. It really feels like we made it to the cyberpunk dystopia. I just wish there was more neon.

>>17941895
why?

>>17942138
because it's nice to be appreciated and it evokes a feeling of accomplishment, and nostalgia.

>>17942172
>It really feels like we made it to the cyberpunk dystopia.
oh, we are 100% there. Be the change you want to see in the world, anon. put neon signs in your window and wear glowstick jewelry.

If you aren't creating large homesteads with your extended family at this point you aren't going to make it

>>17937009
she didn't.

>>17939695
sense of purpose. righteousness

I need to continue reading and losing weight. I used to weigh 160 pounds, but because of covid and not seeing friends, I gained 30 pounds. I've always had issues with my weight--when I was in high school, during junior year, my highest weight was 230. I lost 70 pounds when I transferred to a different high school, but with the loss, I never regained (or rather _gained_) confidence in my body or myself. In one particular memorable episode (that happened not too long ago), I fasted all day, then at 10:00 pm, I binged on food my father brought home. I then threw a tantrum (I'm 18 btw), took a kitchen knife, and sliced my forearm 15 times. All the wounds were superficial, and it barely hurt, but it made me feel better. I'm scared I'll continue this pattern of fasting-binging-cutting and I'll never lose weight, I'll just be in this state of limbo, plateaued infinitely in this cycle.

I need to read because I have many books I have purchased but not read. I'm just starting to read--I've read Submission (by MH) and Siddartha (by HH)--but I need to continue my literary journey to become smarter and more knowledgeable, both of which are noble goals, at least I think so.

I also tend to feel guilt in my life over my status. I come from an upper middle class family (abt. $170,000 cumulative salary between my two parents) but I haven't achieved much so far. I've been given multiple opportunities to achieve great things, but my own indolence prohibited me from actually getting shit done; however, I believe it's better late than never. I'm starting to get things done (as I've mentioned, I've been reading more) and, since I've been off Lexapro, I've had the motivation to do more. Things are looking up. I just need to keep it up and I'll make it bros. We all will make it.

Listening to nujabes. Feeling comfy. I feel like I may have ranted a little too much about political shit to my family today. Cest la vie. I'm tired of being a layabout. I have a full time job but I'm a slacker. I need to make something of myself. Time to grow up.

>>17941236
isn't another solution polygamy but for women? the more men women sleep with, the more chances men will have to have sex.

>>17942544
if I understand you correctly, I think this would more or less end fatherhood as a thing

>>17942555
a woman could have multiple partners, multiple fathers to multiple babies. one woman could have 3-4 suitors living with her. i know this isn't an ideal scenario, but neither is drugging the water (although this already happens--xenoestrogen and fluoride)

This is the worst the board has ever been. It's just /leftypol/ vs /pol/ in every thread. I think most good posters have been driven out by now.

I feel like dating in your 30s is just a complex system of miscommunication. one would have to be very in tune to convey accurately ones own baggage in a way that will translate correctly to the other party, as relating to their baggage.

> get mom on the phone
> come up with excuse why I can’t visit for Easter
> feel kind of bad for a minute
> brother jumps on the phone shouting joking insults
> don’t feel bad anymore
> this is why I didn’t want to go

Took a walk in the forest yet i couldnt truly appreciate the surroundings. It feels like theres a barrier between my heart and the nature.

>grandad was supposed to come help me fix some stuff around the appartment
>didn't hear from him
>don't think anything's wrong, he's very healthy
>can't help but wonder if he finally felt that I don't feel at ease with him
>that has to sting if that's what it is
I don't really know what if anything can be done about it. the times I've tried talking to him about more personal things haven't really worked out, we are very, very different. still I'm his grandkid, it's more or less his right to have a good time with me, and vice versa

I can’t enjoy fiction as much anymore because my mind just detects the patterns
>oh look, it’s the Hero’s Journey yet again
It feels like there’s a limited number of things to write about and we’ve exhausted them

>>17942850
I just want the tradlarpers to leave. They are so embarrassing.

I’m so depressed. I don’t want to see my family. I have such a complicated relationship with them. I can’t stand it.

I don’t want to move in with my parents but I don’t want to keep working.

The single best thing a young American person who aspires to be a novelist, or who simply loves literature, could do is to leave America immediately.

I'm drinking wine at easter and I'm at that happy point when you drink just enough to be happier and I wish I could stay like this forever

What happened on April fools this year?

>>17943645
canadian rake

>>17941400
Look up landlord/tenant laws. Here in Ontario it can take ages to kick someone out if you dig your heels in. I'm talking months.

>>17938731
Not a schizo and I get this. I'll never forget how I once saw some dude in Italy selling a sad looking bird puppet. The sheer sense of sorrow, pity and love that went through my head when I saw that bird puppet was unlike anything I've ever felt for a living human. I was with my parents so I couldn't go and buy it.

>>17943897
Yeah, it's already in the works. Apparently, I have a surprising amount of connections I didn't know I had. I'm really mad that this is all happening, but I don't want to have to deal with this more than I have to. I'm just going to find a nice place and move out as soon as I can. They were pretty inhospitable when they weren't actively trying to kick me out, so I'm not looking forward to pettiness and spite on top of that. Anyway, nothing can be done until Tuesday, so I'm just keeping calm the best I can until then.

>>17938731
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nix6tC3vvjs&ab_channel=thwartd
unironically watch marie kondo

>>17936427
I haven't touched a book in a week

>basically only eat toast with butter and cheese
>supplement with oranges to avoid scurvy
when does this become a problem?

>>17940610
Dont tell me this. It only encourages me. Exactly what I was looking for. Still appreciate it though

>>17944107
What does your body look like?

>>17944107
I don't know when, but I would say this diet has potential to cause at least lack of iron if nothing else. Put some leafy veggies, bellpeppers and tomato on your sandwich. Butter with herbs in it is good, too. Add forest fruit to oranges.

>>17944177
got a little chub, not too bad.
>>17944179
noted.

>>17944107
Luckily for you bread is typically fortified with a bunch of vitamins and what not.

I would stop being so retarded and eat a more normal diet if I were you. Eat some eggs with your toast.

>>17944107
toast with butter and cheese is so fucking good though. I feel you

Most of the monstrosity of greater culture is the reenactment of past epistimes. Politics is an afterthought to our socially well adjusted peers, theyre too caught up in their own lives, but losers are moths to its light. Why is it that the loser finds solace in the language of old people ("born in the wrong generation")? Are they just dumb?

>>17942957
This is what every rom-com is about

>>17941236
>bass-ackwards
reddit moment

>>17942544
There is a tribe in Asia, I think, that practices that, but women and men live in separate villages and only meet for sex. It seems to work for them, although I guess greatly cause of said separation, if they were all living together or at least crossing paths often it would lead to jealousy and violence.

>>17944107
I don't get people who don't eat a wide range of foods. just can't identify

Was Lewis Carroll a pedo? I have been reading Alice in wonderland and cant help but wonder.

I always like learning more about the life of the author when reading a book. It seems there is debate regarding his sexuality.

I guess we will never know. Alice Lidell was indeed a pretty girl.

>we should live in harmony
>but we all have different conceptions of whats good and bad

How are you supposed to reach an agreement when the very base of your foundations are vastly different?

>>17944569
by modern definitions he absolutely was, and by his own admission

>>17944589
His own admission?
Elaborate

>>17936887
I understand you up to some extent, but don't be delusional. Adopting, taking care of a betta fish is... both good and bad, I guess. Same with birds or ''birbs'', same with any ''domestic'' animal, really. Read on it (ethology mostly), observe him carefully. Sometimes you ought to go the extra mile to understand your pets.

>>17937009
>She is both a wise and a thoroghly stupid person.
As most of us are.
Stay vigilant. I have already had a couple of very intimate, internet friends who killed themselves and left me heartstricken and wistful. Together with my best friend from childhood and my sister... I am in a constant state of unease.

>>17937172
This is the worst kind of faggotry there is. Please kill yourself.
p. a faggot

>>17944658
I'll pray for your peace of mind anon. You've certainly earned it with all you've been through. There may be a voice in your head telling you you haven't, but that voice will be wrong. Take care.

I feel bad tonight
I was so harsh towards a particular person recently, to the point where I even lashed out to one of the objects she identifies with. Unnecessary but I lack control over myself once I have reached my threshold. She was pretty much the only one who took care of me. Yet, despite that, I cannot stand hearing her voice nor seeing her face since it just brings me back to a time where the only things that I had done was submerging myself in mediums of escapism and spending most of my day inside my room, with my bed blocking the door to keep it from being opened.
I did some retrospection earlier this evening, gradually remembered the nice things that she had done for me. Made me teary-eyed when I remembered how, in times where I would sleep in another bedroom other than mine, I would wake up the next day on my bed seeing the stickers that I had placed on the surface of my bedroom's cabinet.
She not may be my mother nor does she have an obligation to be responsible in my rearing yet she's pretty much there beside me for most of my life. Nevertheless, I can't bring myself to love her nor care for her and I believe this to be how the harsh things that she had done to me outweighed all the nice things that she did.
Very shitty of me to be honest

>>17943014
shit sucks

My very first ex-girlfriend messaged me yesterday. She said she bought a random duplicate perfume to vaporize her room with because her dog smells and the perfume remembered her of me.

The day before, I had an argument on zoom with a girl that's neither an ex nor a nobody, just a girl with whom I used to flirt with and haven't spoke to for months. I literally dreamt of her that night.

Fuck them both. Anyways, I'm eating pasta and chicken nuggets with roquefort today. I feel like a king.

I hate my job. I hate working. There is nothing I want to do.

>>17944837
Can't blame you, I have a terrible relationship with my mother. In fact, I have terrible relationships with people in general.
Just don't be that cliché of the shut-in that treats his mother like shit, even if you don't love her, don't be a dick to the people that love you, man.
What am I even doing, what is this, reddit?
>>17936453
> grown man still thinks of his old girlfriend
> grown man still dreams of hugging her at night
> kek
> suddenly you realize you're the same

>>17945000
>I'm eating pasta and chicken nuggets with roquefort today
not bad

I need to get over the hedonism that I've been holding on to since pubescence. It does nothing for me yet I still stubbornly cling to it

>>17937997
Lmfaooooooooooo your advice to a man that has never had friends is to join a CHOIR? Lmfaooooooo.

>>17945021
Exhausted by work, you decide to sleep an hour or so in order to clear your mind.
You wake up the next day instead. You don't know what happened, but it doesn't matter. You need to get to work.
The evening after work, you decide to sleep an hour to clear your exhausted mind.
You wake up the next day instead. You don't know what happened, but it doesn't matter. You need to get to work.
It's the week-end now. It's time to visit your family.
You come back home, and decide to sleep off the social fatigue you've built during the week.
It's sunday now, you need to clean up your house, get some groceries and check your mails.
You think of doing something you're truly passionnate about and grab a dusty book on the shelf. You read three pages, and then decide to check your Facebook feed to see if something new is worth seeing today.
Exhausted by your day, you decide to sleep. For once, you'll at least have a full night of rest before work! Haha. Good night, Anon.

Alone for Easter. Didn’t prepare a meal for myself. Don’t even have groceries. What should I do for dinner?

>>17945083
the idea was that first of all my boy gotta start thinking that things are possible (and they are), and second singing in a group is a way of socialising without socialising. it forges bonds, it does stuff to people. I think church groups and the like are a good opportunity for getting to know people if you have no other ins, and they'd let you join regardless of your voice. I knew a guy who was pretty down and out but sang in a choir and sait it was pretty much the good part of his life

If I accept basically nihilism as my reference point, what reason do I have to continue showing up to work, being sober, looking presentable and so on? It’s certainly not noble so it’s not a self given principle. The only reason I can conceive of is to perhaps make my parents happy and to have women not think I’m a fuck up. That’s it.

I think I’m going to just stop showing up to my job then. I’m already a pill addict.

I feel sick all the time. I think I could be dying. My ears ring all the time and my eyes are very sensitive to light. I had bad inflation for a while and that seemed to do a lot of damage.

The closer I've gotten to death, the more I've realized how silly most strife in life is. You'll lose it all in the end. It's good to live for the things and people you love, but don't waste your life chasing after dreams which demand that you postpone living for a greater life in the future.

I wish I would have been able to love more. I just never really respected most people. I always thought they weren't worthy of my respect because they were so simple minded. I should have taught them instead of looking down on them with scorn. I think I missed my calling as a leader and ended up as a recluse instead.

I have hundreds of pages of unpublished writings and two unpolished novels. I spent so much time alone. For what? I've always felt closer to people when I'm far away reflecting on them. Was I cursed? In any event, my thoughts are with eternity now and I truly don't care what happens to my work. Ceasar will sound just the same as any ordinary name in the long of time. I never really cared about making my mark on this transitory world. I just wanted to understand myself and the world. What I ended up finding was truly anticlimactic and made me feel like a fool. The most profound truths are the most elementary, but they are also the most painful. Courage, not intellect, is the road to clarity and truth. Confusion is ultimately cowardice. This becomes clear near the end, when life no longer blinds you with its fear of death.

>>17945219
Wouldn't say it's meningitis, but sounds like meningitis, go see a doctor.
> I wish I would have been able to love more. I just never really respected most people. I always thought they weren't worthy of my respect because they were so simple minded. I should have taught them instead of looking down on them with scorn. I think I missed my calling as a leader and ended up as a recluse instead.
pseud

>>17945123
Eggs as it's Easter.

home, home on the raaaaaange

>>17941573
>crippling depression
every disgusting tenants has some excuse, no one says "i'm jus a gross person", you're not special sorry

>>17945253
No fever. Doesn't seem like an infection. And thanks for the pseud lol.

I walked around Versailles today. Saw this chick with a huge ass. Cheeks as big as my head perhaps.

>>17945353
nice

>>17945207
Gotta get money somehow

Sex addicts are just handsome coomers.

>>17943982
I think every kid got this at some point after watching Toy Story for the first time. Literally every friend I've ever talked to about has the same story of worrying that their toys were actually sentient and the ethical dilemma that would imply. I used to be super careful with my toys when I was a kid and give them equal attention because of that worry. I would handle them with the same level of care I would handle my pets, because I didn't want to potentially hurt them without realizing it. In hindsight I suppose that if one does this then it does show a rather high level of empathy, even if it is totally batshit insane.

>>17941923
Ya man. Makes sense

I own a guitar. When someone asks, "Can you play it?" I say yeah, because anything I want to learn I can pretty quickly, but usually because it just takes a few power chords. However I feel like I'm missing out. I want to make music like the artists I enjoy, which are usually pretty simple in terms of technical skill, but can be quite hard in terms of composition and recording/mixing. Even if you have all the tools, making a good mix (or even something that sounds like what you desire as a final product) is extremely hard as a beginner. Everyone seems to know compressors, EQs, reverb, chaining, etc. like the back of their hand and how to sculpt an elaborate sound out of thin air that matches a professional mixer's work. Kids are getting famous now doing just that - pirating software and just playing around with it, learning from youtube and toying with it until they get seriously good at it.

But when I try it I feel lost. Almost wish I had a coach where I would just ask him, "Please guide me through recreating this song in ableton" and he would show me. I know there are youtubers for this I guess but most just do EDM production which is a different ballgame from rock music. So essentially I have an entire hobby I want to get more into, but it feels impenetrable, and each effort to fix it has been kind of a waste of time.

>>17936427
I love God, He died for my sins on a cross because He loves me so much. God is a cool guy.

>>17945561
That was Jesus, not God.
Jesus is not God.

>>17945594
Jesus is God the Son of the Trinity.

>>17945539
Lmao. I remember being a kid. Dude, unless you have serious connections, you will not make money in music. It's a dead end. Don't fall for the gambler outlook. Don't look at one random success and think it improves your chances. Just like hearing about a lottery winner. You are not going to be a lottery winner or musician. The sooner you get this through your head, the better off you will be. Don't waste your time on meaningless things. Life is incredibly brutal. You will regret your youthful stupidity. No one will care that you can play wonderwall while working in middle management.

>>17936427
I'm just in the kind of loop where you just open youtube and listen to the old songs and then into some random youtube videos and then back again until your day passes in a sort of dopamine injected daydream of cheap entertainment... that sort of thing.

It's been months since I've been like that.

I guess I can't get over the nostalgia, it's killing me, I think.

>>17945610
I'm not trying to "make it", I just want to make music I enjoy for myself. Most of my favorite artists never left obscurity.

>>17941923
Government has nothing to do with why the majority of people are depressed or wish to end their lives. I am not saying that it is impossible because there would be cases of government forcing people but expectations and the inability of accepting life is the ultimate killer.

I'm more likely to read an author if his Wikipedia page has an Antisemitism section.

>>17945699
Louis de Bonald

>>17945642
That's a lie. Analyze your post. Your mind is on success. It's impossible for it not to be. Your survival and mental health depend on it. I happen to have a father who failed to become a musician--also s guitarist. He basically went crazy after realizing no one cared about his music. Be honest with yourself. Be wise with your life! Much sorrow waits for you if you are investing your energy in things that will never come to fruition!

>>17945696
Oh, it's the government alright. They have demolished our culture, leaving many people alienated.

I find it hilarious that whenever people who I cared about were depressed I tried being there for them. But now that I needed some warmth in my life, they never cared back.

"I just have nothing to say, it is not that I don't want to talk". Meanwhile they spent all their time with their new buddies playing video games or whatever.

>>17945539
I just wish I could even play the guitar.

>>17936427
I hadn't realized just how close I was to mental instability last winter. I want to fix everything, throw away a decade of willful incompetence, denial and cowardice. I don't know what I'll be able to salvage, but I'll do my best. Some things I might never be able to say that should have been said, but I hold out hope that one day I can, with my head held high and explain to the people I let down why I did so and how rising back form it made me a better man than I would otherwise have ever been.

>>17945219
>The most profound truths are the most elementary, but they are also the most painful. Courage, not intellect, is the road to clarity and truth. Confusion is ultimately cowardice. This becomes clear near the end, when life no longer blinds you with its fear of death.
Thanks, anon. I trust your journey isn't over yet.

>>17945848
Thanks friend. I hope so.

My legs are so damn itchy. Nothing helps, not even moisturizing lotion. I can scratch it till the blood comes out.

>>17945427
Why? Could I just spend what I got and get it however when I need it? If I even need it all, which is debatable.

>>17945269
You’re telling me I should drive to the grocery store to buy a single carton of eggs in order to prepare eggs, just eggs, in order to eat for dinner because it’s Easter?

>>17945929
lol you got poison ivy or sth?

>>17945944
>drive to the grocery store to buy a single carton of eggs
go to the corner bodega dumbass, you don't have to drive to target to buy eggs

>>17945929
Diabetes

>>17945964
Ah. I see you just assumed I was a Dominican living in Washington Heights but alas, no. I live in rural America. We don’t have any “bodegas”.

>>17945979
don't they call them "mom & pop shops" or something out there run by really old white people from europe?

>>17942187
Yeah but it's especially nice old ladies.

the nice weather is making everything indoors seem boring. i think i'm going to go wander around listening to audiobooks.

When i want to create something i go thinking about it beforehand and then i compile so much arguments on why its not good enough i dont do it at all. Getting drunk doesnt help. How do i get over this?

>>17946035
there are tons of self-help books about perfectionism and fear of failure

>>17945970
i tested sugar level in blood around christmas and it was normal.
>>17945946
unless someone rubs it when im sleeping kek

Public execution should be brought back...

>>17946220
They won't let that happen. This is a Disney world now. Only happiness and magic is allowed now. All suffering and wickedness must be kept private.

>>17943069
This is a good thing. You are being shown that your intellectual enjoyment of fiction has outlived its usefulness. Something calls for you to enjoy storytelling with your entire being, to include your emotions and your intuition and not just your airy, disembodied intellect.

>>17946293
Not anon but I find it hard to do that anymore. getting an undergrad in English has made it impossible for me to enjoy lit anymore, my immediate urge is to analytically dissect.
I just want to be able to enjoy without thinking again like when I was a child...

Prisoners should work for their food, and their luxuries.
They also should be kept under a much stricter view, so they don't form gangs while in prison, to continue their criminal activities once outside.

>>17937193
What is the correct response in this situation?

>>17936427
i might develop a left wing, marxist NRx philosophy

>>17946376
Ignore them.
Like you would ignore an unwashed homeless guy, who walks up to people to ask for money.

>>17946389
she was so cute though
she even wrapped this bracelet around my wrist

I got a blowjob yesterday from a girl from a bar. Should I get tested?

How do you find your voice as an author when your influences are pretty different. How am I supposed to reconcile reading Wilde and Dostoevsky?

>>17937793
you are going to meet a lot of people throughout your life who you are simply too based to be understood by, and you will either have to stoop to their level to be liked by them or see them leave. it's up to you to decide which will make you happier in the end

>>17937968
can you tell me a bit more about this? what is he like now? is he still a muslim? is he happy? is he still "radical"?

>>17936427
"trans identified people have...own reality." Quite. For example, what of men who are women who want to be men? In other words, telescoping gender identities. Who's to say such telescoping gender identities don't subjectively go on & on & on, like a sexo-genderal mise en abyme?

>>17946478
I dont think you can get corona this way

>>17945056
Thanks mang
>what is this, reddit?
yes, you forgot that the UI changed? ^^

>>17946637
Very funny anon

i feel so bored today idk why probably the weather. there's a ton of shit i could do, but i don't really want to do anything. nothing feels engaging.

- biological states associate with all of the nerve systems
- emotions reflect our ability to experience states of the nervous system.

is this my nervous system speaking? hello operator.

i’ve lost control of my body and i’m scared. or is it my mind? i don’t know. it bothers me. how could i know? the whole thing pisses me off. i can’t restart. dig my way out i guess. it’s all perspective. i’m not going anywhere. i’m supposed to stay right here maybe. going forward makes me run out of fuel. the easiest thing is to not do. subtract it. easy. i acknowledge my feelings. i FEEL my feelings, bodily. i notice sensations in my body. not mystical. i can FEEL it. intreptation is the correct word. we interpret emotions, not know what they are. interpret your emotions like dreams.

we interpret our emotions, we don’t know what they are.

>>17941236
Adjustment day talks exactly about that - the government plotting a war to reduce the number of males. It's the best thing the guy has written since right club.

I’m about to order a delivery box of deluxe cookies for my Easter Sunday dinner.

Why are Femdom and Cuckoldry so intimately linked? I understand the compulsion for a man to submit to feminine power, but why is seeing that attention turned away part of the fantasy? Women who prefer hypersubmission generally don't get off seeing their man sleeping around, do they? Does it have something to do with the core of masculine sexuality?

>>17945219
>Ludwig? Ludwig, is that you?
>Yes, mother
>come home, my son
>I have none
>You have me

>>17945767
I'm sorry your dad is a loser but stop projecting him on other people. My uncle was also a failed musician and everyone in the family knew about it but that didn't stop my brother from having music as his hobby (guitar, bass, piano, composition, mixing).

>>17947416
there's a lot of middle ground between total wastoid who just teaches guitar lessons on the weekend and literal rockstar. i've known a few people who played hardcore/punk type bands with varying levels of success. they're not rich and have day jobs, but they've released albums and gone on tours, etc. basically you have to go after live gigs, and when you land a gig, you have to put on a good show. if you don't have some big label marketing the shit out of you, the way to get buzz is to be willing to put on great shows anywhere and everywhere.

>>17947469
I think you have to be very, very realistic about your own appeal and marketability. From my personal experience, I don't think its *that* hard to get noticed within a certain scene if you are a great performer and your music is entertaining. Particularly if your scene is a relatively small one where most of the bands know each other. From there, you can gain a following that you can then build up from.

But if you JUST make good music, even if it really technically good, but you don't have any appeal outside of that, you're going to have to work A LOT harder to get people to listen to it, let alone fork out money for it.

>>17936427
I have the urge to buy some books on gardening/farming/etc. Purely in case the end of civilization as we know it happens in my life time and I have them with me. I have little to zero interest in it otherwise.

Idk what that says about me or my mental state, but it’s nice to say out loud. I also bought books on wilderness survival for the same reason. I thought it was because I had an interest in camping, I’ve since realized that wasn’t true, and love my bed and my apartment far more then I can say. I do enjoy walks in nature, being outside in general, but in a very controlled environment.

Perhaps this will all change someday, or needs to be changed personally by me.

>>17947500
oh yeah for sure. i know another guy who's in some metalcore band, cringe genre to me, but that aside, he spent a ton of money getting his album and ep professionally mastered, and even had a professionally produced music video. the problem is, they were like "we're gonna shop it around to major labels" in my mind i'm thinking i know there were some metalcore bands that went mainstream like 15 years ago but i think you dudes missed that, and on top of that they picked a super generic name that like five other bands in similar metal adjacent genres already use so when they tell you their name you have to to scroll past all the other bands to see if you see someone you recognize in their fancy ass video. they went nowhere as far as i know. overambitious, played out genre, poor work ethic, bad branding decisions. don't be like that.

>>17947510
you know you're becoming a prepper wacko? just hopefully giving you some self-awareness

Lockdown is poetic. It serves to protect the lives lead by those who have lived but no longer do so -- the sickly, elderly and obese and such. In turn, it reduces the active lives of the young into the staticity of the old. What we saw could've been the sacrifice of the old for the young, instead it went the other way around. The young lose 1 - 2 years of their youth so that the old and sickly could be old and sick for another decade.

>>17937073
what a supremely beautiful creature

>>17936427
I feel like life is going to keep getting worse and worse. Social media and identity politics have molded society in such a way as to make people take actual masochistic joy in hating each other and tearing each other down. Every political issue has been framed as an existential threat and if you don't agree with someone they immediately react by freaking the fuck out. It's tiresome and makes meeting new people painful. I'm quite ready for the asteroid.

>>17939238
haruki murakami. regardless of his skill he's made bank

>>17939238
Ted K proves you wrong. If the publishers won't come to you, you'll have to be more creative.

>>17947062
Emasculation

>>17947946
Yeah, Ted K isn’t exactly a notable novelist there, bud.

>>17947921
His parents were literature teachers and he studied Drama at university. Also, his books are not even good.

>>17947982
He IS a writer. You didn't mention novelist, but on the end, don't novelists peak late in their lives?

>>17939918
i've had a day to think about this... while i may have lost some good stuff, there was probably a lot more shit. Overall, it's probably a net positive it was forever wiped from the world.

That being said I intent to exclusively have these things in A5 notepads/booklets from now on.

Any recs?

>>17947892
Thank you, he really is. Every day I'm in awe of his perfection.

Going to model my life on this guy.

>>17936427
I want to fuck

>>17948854
grody

She is too good for me and I don't deserve her. I'm just thankful that she's even willing to talk to me at all and be friends. I've always wanted to date a girl similar to her. She is a wonderful person and of course I am blowing it like I always do. I am a piece of shit, but I do really want a relationship with this girl and I care about her. I really genuinely think she is special and I do want to pursue her but she doesn't seem that interested. Whenever something may have started in the past there was always something going wrong. Mainly it was my fears and fears of failing again so I never actually asked her out. I'm happy to have a friend back in my life but I need to stop the romantic ideas. I've always been my own worst enemy when it comes to women, and it doesn't appear to have changed at all.

I'm not sure what to do, no one in my life seems to want to hang out anymore and I am losing ambition or will to continue with my obligations. I wish I knew someone I can talk to about it, but the friends I do have don't care. I have no one to share with. I've always just wanted a normal life with a house, wife, friends, and kids. I feel like there is something terribly wrong with me, and I'm afraid I'm just losing it, but I don't know how to fix it.

it happened again- i pissed myself

> I've always just wanted a normal life with a house, wife, friends, and kids.
NGMI

>>17949104
Based.

>>17949104
>not wearing diapers
Own fault.

>>17946597
he is still a muslim. he has struggled with it to an extent, but he is for sure still a muslim. he is not still radical, he doesn't like that he followed teachings that declared takfir (declared as dis-belief) other streams of islam. He was some form of salafi all through high school, and it really served him in sorting out his life. I can't imagine he ever watched porn during those years, for instance, and he apparently got exceedingly good grades and seems to have been quite harmonious. He is not at all knowledgeable in pop-culture, he lived behind a veil. Then he got more and more lost in technical theology until it kind of consumed him. Now he is levelling out with sufi poetry. He's a little shaken but I think he is happy and I think he has very good chances of leading a happy life. He has this light of holiness about him, he is completely naturally kind and just, stands up for what is right. I think he will become a father within a few years and that he will be the best father, simply put.

Your life is predetermined, there's no free will. Too bad we're conscious for a story that has already started and finished but we're lagging behind a second at a time for some reason. It's torture so maybe this is "hell".

>>17947558
there's nothing wacko about most preppers, the entire nation of switzerland are preppers