/lit/ - Literature

Been toying with an idea for a while and even posted it on one of the Novel Idea threads.

It follows the protagonist going about her everyday life normally, however, she slowly starts to become aware of the reader. She thinks you are a stalker at first and confides in her friends and family but they think she is crazy as they are not aware of you. Eventually, she is shunned by them. As the story progresses it becomes an unrequited love story between the reader and the protag and you are all she has left. After some time she can feel the end of the book approaching and tells you that although she will forget you, she hopes you will always remember her. She asks that you one day read her story one more time so that she can fall in love with you all over again.

I was thinking of making it into a psychological novel, but I know very little about how to write those. Are there any tips that can help me.

>>17700877
That's just dokidoki literature club but a book

>>17700880
>That's just dokidoki literature club but a book
I never played dokidoki literature club, so I'm afraid to ask if you're being serious since I spent a considerable amount of time working on this idea and I don't want it to end in waste.

>>17700906
The twist is the same but the girl is a yandere who makes her NPC friends kill themselves instead of feeling stalked and isolated.

>>17700911
But mine isn't all that much of a twist? Thanks, by the way, I can work with that. I was afraid of it being a carbon copy.

Are there any online resources for writing characters, some kind of list of examples such as likes, dislikes, ideas, strengths, flaws, etc... Thinking of writing a few short stories, five or seven pages long, before attempting to write the story I actually want to write.

>>17700980
Did you try googling before you asked this question

>>17700989
I did in fact, but most of the advice I can find online seems really obvious and essential (like writing every day) or just kind of stupid and irrelevant that doesn't pertain what I want.

>>17700996
Try this?

https://www.fantasynamegenerators.com/

Don’t know if it will help you, but I think it’s what you’re looking for. You can always check some tabletop games and run some ideas from that? Sorry I couldn’t be much of a help.

Anyone successful here? How many hours do you write per week? Do you read more than you write? I need help and I'm legit too afraid to ask my friends or family.

>>17701036
>I'm legit too afraid to ask my friends or family.
Afraid of asking them of what? Reading your rough draft? I doubt many of us would help in that front.

>>17701048
>Afraid of asking them of what?
I think I'm overworking myself in writing my novel. I wake up with headaches, whenever I sit down and try and type, I get nauseous, I've been getting irritable at everyone and also been tired to do anything other than sleep.

Why do people hate telling so much in writing. Showing is good but if you try to show everything you'll end up with a complete slog of a story. Surely, telling, even if its a little, is good?


>>17701067
>I think I'm overworking myself in writing my novel. I wake up with headaches, whenever I sit down and try and type, I get nauseous, I've been getting irritable at everyone and also been tired to do anything other than sleep.
Take a week or two off, this shit sounds so unhealthy. Also, go and see a doctor for your health.

>tfw want to grind out the short stories for practice
>tfw never really read short stories
Who should I go read, anons?

>>17701142
read short stories

Do you guys have any advice for people who are introverts and not well-spoken trying to write?

Every time I try and write dialogue for my characters, they come out stilted and a bit formal, even when the situation doesn't call for it. I've been watching youtube videos and reading more to try and get out of that habit, but I haven't been making strides towards my goal. Should I go out and interact with people to get an idea?

>>17701167
Stop being retarded and blaming your personality traits for your subpar writing skills and actually write

>>17701067
Going to add what this anon said >>17701096 don't fall into the trap of writing every day, write at your own pace, don't try to force yourself to write if you ain't feeling it. That shit is detrimental and you will burn yourself out.

>>17701193
Saying just write won't help him. He's clearly writing.

>come up with neat world people like
>want to write a trilogy and get trad. pubbed but chances of that as my debut are laughable
>rework the first book so that it's self-contained with a potential sequel as a hook, but it's still too long after 2nd draft to debut with
>friend says I should write a standalone set in my world first and write the trilogy later if gets picked up
Is he right? Or is he trying to hinder me?

Fuck I fell asleep again and we have another retarded anime thread

Do you guys have any advice/guidelines on how to write open-ended fiction? I do have an idea or two for stories that could be set in a shared universe, but I don't have any clue as to how to develop them. If I know the ending in advance, I can work my way back, but without an ending in sight, I'm at a loss. I suppose I could come up with a list of objectives that the character has to achieve in order to progress and treat these as endings. But I feel if I do that, I will inevitably write myself in a corner. Should I still attempt it?

What are your MC's flaws?

Can you write about sex if you're never had it?

>>17701334
Tries to be a man's man but fails.

>>17701353
Dick goes in the vagina.

>>17701314
Write without worrying about the ending and see what you get. You might find something you like and then you can edit it

>>17701353
Anon, I bought a bunch of porn novels from Amazon and let me tell you, the sex scenes are subpar. Yet, people still buy them. If you need some help on how to write sex, visit a few literotica sites, to give some insight.

>>17700842
Is there healthy rivalry between /wg/ and /ffa/? Nature of their work makes it infinitely easier to produce something tangible.

>>17701385
I don't want to write porn or erotica, I mean sex in a non-porn story

>>17701390
Oh, sorry for the misunderstanding. Yeah, you can write sex even if you never had it. What made you believe otherwise?

>>17701404
It might come off cringey

>>17701415
If it’s their first time having sex, then it’s going to come off as awkward. Everyone’s first time is awkward

>>17701417
But then what do I do about the next times

>>17701386
>Is there healthy rivalry between /wg/ and /ffa/?
I wouldn’t say rivalry, but I also post of /ffa/. Why do you ask?

>>17701359
I don’t know, anon, I feel like people should have at least an outline of their novel. If only so they don’t get mired in writing their story.

>>17701443
If you're really lost it's fine to just write until you feel inspired. You can make an outline at any point in the writing process. There's no timeline you need to follow.

>>17701424
Wouldn’t change since their still inexperienced in sex. How many sex scenes are you writing? Because you might be writing erotica.

>>17701334
Possessive, manipulative, controlling, narcissistic, and sociopathic. Not even a good person, just downright awful.

>>17701357
>Tries to be a man's man but fails
In what way? There’s plenty of ways to be a man.

>>17700877
If it's aimed for weebs. Good. But I don't think it would work for anyone else desu. Not even the YA market

>>17701427
I was just wondering because they're basically on opposite ends of trying to write something. It makes sense people would frequent both threads. Flash fiction could almost be creative venting compared writing that epic trilogy everyone seems to be into these days.

>>17701503
>But I don't think it would work for anyone else desu. Not even the YA market
I feared this, any reason why?

>>17701310
There's a real thread up too, but anime draws retards like hot shit draws flies

>>17701468
Sounds like the average man

>>17701523
>Flash fiction could almost be creative venting compared writing that epic trilogy everyone seems to be into these days.
Not dying it, it helps me cool off when writing my actual novel. Shame it's awful.

>>17701540
It’s a woman, anon.

>>17701524
It's too mawkish. Fuck. I hate being put on the spot like this because you worked hard on it obviously. But as I was reading your synopsis all I could envision was some type of slice of life anime. But the good news is, is that any idea can work and I'm obviously not a professional just a guy stating his opinion. It all comes down to execution but I think it the execution really has to be less than stellar if you don't want this coming off as corny. What type of books do you read by the way?

>>17701556
*nothing less than stellar

>>17701547
It sounds like the average woman too

>>17701524
She's basically a waifu.

>want to write something in first person
>keep cringing really hard and feeling like im self inserting myself into the book

MAKE IT STOP

>>17701556
Don't be feel bad and I'm sorry if I put you on the spot, I didn't intend to. But it's great to have a second opinion, you know, it's one of the reasons why /wg/ is here for.

>What type of books do you read by the way?
Recently, I've been reading a lot of literary genres, mostly crime fiction and YA. Haven't read since High-school so I'm trying to ease my way up.

>>17701596
Try writing in third-person limited. It helped me.

>>17701556
>mawkish
The term has a negative connotation but it's what I like about sentimental anime stories desu, I feel like this element of unrepentant sentimentality is missing in most modern works.

>THE
>HE
>I
>THEY
>WE
>IT
>A
>THEN
>AN
>(CHARACTER NAME)

>>17701636
The he I they we it a then an (character name).

>>17701627
>third-person limited.

I just looked it up and that is the method im using lol

People told me writting is supposed to be smooth and fluid, but i feel more like im hammering and forcing words out of myself

>>17701636
This was me last week too kek. Got over it by analyzing the section in a portrait of the artist as a young man where they move to Blackrock

>>17701452
I'll let you decided, anon. Don't hold anything back.

>>17701671

>>17701657
>but i feel more like im hammering and forcing words out of myself
Try taking a break, or write a different story, clear the mind a bit before resuming.

>>17701747
Sometimes the words flow really smooth and easily, no thinking required

But its rare and i will never finish anything by just relying on that

Im just gonna try to write with my brain turned off

>>17701543
Anon, I....

>>17699652
>Why do you even bother? The only ones working on writing are the animefags. Everything else is just shitposting or blogposting.

i'm curious. you make this same post almost every thread. post your writing.

>>17701671
Lots of descriptive writing that paints the setting well. I get the feeling that MC isn't worried about the curfew announcement, but I'm not sure since there's lots of descriptions for the setting. If this is the beginning, there's nothing that hooks me.

>>17701167
stop thinking about yourself when you are writing, and... just write. when you are creating, just think about your creation.

>>17701812
The crunchy sound of the leaves beneath his feet was satisfying. With each step, Rudy Everett jumped to avoid the puddles that had filled the forest the night before. The trees sobbed around him, thick drops falling on his head. He liked to pretend he was an explorer, living countless adventures that would put most of his favorite movie characters to shame. A solemn breeze made its way through the trees, which had already begun to take on the warm colors of autumn. The accompanying sound was a spectral whisper that made Rudy imagine all sorts of situations: a giant hiding in the earth’s depths, who had been awakened from his long sleep, or perhaps the voices of the forest’s spirits, whispering.

>>17701812
Here’s an excerpt from one of my self-published works

The crunchy sound of the leaves beneath his feet was satisfying. With each step, Rudy Everett jumped to avoid the puddles that had filled the forest the night before. The trees sobbed around him, thick drops falling on his head. He liked to pretend he was an explorer, living countless adventures that would put most of his favorite movie characters to shame. A solemn breeze made its way through the trees, which had already begun to take on the warm colors of autumn. The accompanying sound was a spectral whisper that made Rudy imagine all sorts of situations: a giant hiding in the earth’s depths, who had been awakened from his long sleep, or perhaps the voices of the forest’s spirits, whispering.

>>17701846
Having some worry in which the direction of the story is going is healthy though.

>>17701772
>Im just gonna try to write with my brain turned off
Honestly the best thing you could do. Stop worrying. Everyone’s first draft is shit.

>>17701817
>If this is the beginning, there's nothing that hooks me.
Then I failed. Thanks for the critique. Would you say I need to tone down the description?

>>17701589
Yeah, well, I was trying to portray a sociopathic woman in my story.

>>17701589
Yeah, well, I was trying to portray a sociopathic woman in my story, not a normal woman. Any tips?

>>17701898
i read the first two chapters and honestly they didn't convince me to continue. the first chapter was not scary. it was a slog and had no urgency. a lot of it felt like listing and, ultimately, boring. the dialogue was not very believable in both chapters. both chapters ended very weakly. nevertheless it's by no means shit and you did a great job actually writing multiple books that other people read, if that really is you.

>>17701958
Not the original anon who replied but its boring. You know how to write for sure. But it's just boring. Do you read modern fiction? Because I think you and certainly some other anions try to replicate writing styles from half a century ago and they don't always translate well. If you're going to go that route then you have to be really talented and something special. Look at modern books and mix it up

>>17702018
Thanks, I’ll take what you said in consideration. As for writing like a half-century ago, I think it has to do with me being embarrassed more than anything. Considering how much /lit/ shits on modern fiction.

>>17701661
this is me all the time

>>17701630
>I feel like this element of unrepentant sentimentality is missing in most modern works.
Modernist writing is soulless. New books feel like factories churning out stories that are already written before.

>>17701036
>Anyone successful here?
No
>How many hours do you write per week?
3-4
>Do you read more than you write?
I haven’t read anything since I started writing

>>17701334
Compulsive liar

>>17701958
I'll parrot what the other anon said and add that you'll need a solid hook within the first 300 words (or approx 1 novel page). Things like clickbait titles have gained prominence for a good reason. It works, and you need to replicate that if you want to appeal to modern readers.

If you're not appealing to modern readers, then just focus on making the MC's motives known to the reader sooner rather than later.

>>17701334
Inability to let go, naive, ultranationalist and detached from most of society

>>17702214
Once again, thanks. I’ll take what you said in consideration.

>>17702159
I think that's just a logical outcome of reliance on increasingly defined (sub)genres. When you distill ideas to couple of key ones that garner popularity and people start abusing those you'll get a made-on-conveyor-belt product in the end. Just look at the state of modern Isekai for the most blatant example.

>>17702274
>Just look at the state of modern Isekai for the most blatant example.
Not just Isekai, take a look at YA. Hunger games was such a success that rip-offs were created

>>17702296
YA and Isekai are both garbage though, literally a waste of trees

>>17702312
Yeah, and it’s because of that it’s in it’s current position

This is a little excerpt inspired by this image

"a poor effort, Margaret" said Sgt.Pepper with disdain whilst pacing around the pile of snow that was supposed to represent him.
He began to lazily extract with his mouth the wiry twigs that had failed to capture the elegance of his whiskers.After spitting out the final offending sprig he turned to look up at Margaret with half closed eyes
"My displeasure shall manifest on your pillow later. Pray I do not find a mouse to substantiate my stool"
Margaret stood stoically and said nothing, having been taught silence in these situtaions lest she sought a bout of batting from his groomed paw.
Having meted out her just desserts he began to slink back indoors but could not resist turning
"A few hours outdoors may hone your snow-sculpting to an acceptable level"
He nudged the door shut with his head and attempted to lock the door by jumping and turning the key which took several attempts.
Margaret knew not to look when Sgt. Pepper tried to close doors, his one insecurity despite his aloofness.
The wind picked up and cut through her cardigan, but not as much as it cut her to see the head roll off the sculpture she made and thud into the snow.
She began to retreat into herself and began replaying The Hangover in her mind, the only movie she was allowed to watch
"What happens in vegas, stays in vegas" she said to herself quietly with a vacant smile.

>>17702226
Yugoslav wars veteran?

>>17702398
Its like Gundam in Yugoslavia

>>17702406
>Gundam in Yugoslavia
Which one though? There’s like dozen of them.

>>17702339
Decent. Are you going for a Warriors angle? And have a clan of cats, but it’s instead it’s just house cats?

>>17700877
Sounds cool you should write it

Thoughts on writing the time? Number notation (5:30), writing it out (five-thirty), half past five?
5 o'clock?

>>17702467
Use the more modern one.

>>17701334
Can’t be honest with anyone, not even to himself.

>>17702447
Nah, just let my imagination run with this image but I think the idea only has legs for a short story, its better left to the imagination I think to imagine the absurd rules Sgt.Pepper has to torment this woman

I really don't understand why some /litizens/ are trying to parrot classic writers. First of all modern education is so different you'll never be able to replicate what they did. Second and I think most important of all, unless you're writing for yourself, you'll never gain an audience. Think about the stereotypical classics reader. They will never give your work a chance. Look at this board. Look at their views on modern work. It's a dead-end. Be inspired by the classics but don't replicate them. Translate them for the modern reader.

>>17702613
What the fuck does the modern reader what anyway?

Im just trying to convey some ideas i feel strongly about, maybe make the reader think about some topics for a bit.

>>17702613
I write how I want about what I want
Fuck the reader

>>17702631
Did you read what I said. I said if you're writing for yourself then good. This is more to people who want to actually write for a living
>>17702625
>what do modern readers want anyway
There are different types of readers. There are a lot of "highbrow" readers yearning for more novels to read. My main point is that instead of trying to write for a reader from the late 1800s to the early 1900s you should examine your work and try to present it best for modern readers. Remember they have read the classics. If you're going to be another Dostoevsky copycat they are probably going to laugh it off. But if let's say you're inspired by Dosto you could maybe write something like Crime and Punishment but have the main character reflect modern times. Maybe he's an incel or libtard who are brainwashed by the internet into believing their ideologies to a point where they act upon it etc

>>17702190
>3-4
are you super busy or something?

>>17702339
kek

>start in medias res
>get told "start your story earlier"
How am I supposed to react to this?

>>17702797
>people have different opinions and preferences
Stop writing exactly what /wg/ tells you and just write what you want and how you want it
Can't please everyone

>>17702797
post your opening line and i will tell you the truth i promise

>>17702833
I posted it here before and no one seemed to have a problem. Reddit is getting confused with the past and present storytelling as well, at least I expected this.

>>17702797
How many books have you read and finished that actually started in the middle of some action scene or dialogue or whatever? That is a trick for short stories. With novels, the reader wants to understand stakes before anything else. Raising the stakes can wait for that.

>>17701596
>write in first person
>basically just use my thought processes as a reference
>narrator comes off as extremely insane and neurotic
I don't know I find it really captivating

>>17701334
1st MC is a pacifist of sorts and has survivors guilt, and reluctance to follow orders that may result in needless deaths. 2nd MC agonizes over her decisions too much and can't let go of the past and has codependency issues later on

guys just letting youi know that first person is usually incel

>>17702952
>write in first person
>MC is an emotionless husk who has a cynical quip sometimes

>>17703045
>>17703112
>MC checks his watch every few pages for no reason other than habit

>>17702933
Funny thing is that I considered what I wrote to be a kind of short story. There's enough wiggle room for more story, but I did try to make it as obvious as I could with the ending paragraphs.

I incorporated other anons feedbacks the last time I posted this. I don't have plans to keep working on this, though.

>>17701334
He's far too quick to trust people who seem good or who care for him owing to abandonment issues.

“Sorry to ruin your day off.”

He gave up trying to light the damp cigarette and threw it to the ground. “Make it up to me later. What’s the situation?”

“Lunch rush, some nut in a dress tries to sneak into the women’s bathroom. Employee stops him. That’s when it all goes to shit. Based on witness reports we could be dealing with at least a class 4 mutation.”

“Great,” he muttered. “We got visuals inside?”

“Cameras are down, one of the diners got it on video.”

“Guess I better take a look.”

The video was shaky and low quality but showed exactly what the chief had described. An restaurant employee in a shouting match with a tall man in a dress and a wig. It looked like something out of a sketch comedy show. Sir you can’t go in there, the employee kept repeating. But I’m a woman, it was shouting back.

“How long does this go on for?”

“Another 15 minutes.”

“Skip to the end.”

The video now showed a crowd beginning to gather around the argument. Sir you CANNOT use the women’s bathroom, the employee said exasperatedly. You are a MAN in a dress. You need mental help. Do you want me to call 911? At that point the tall man stopped arguing and went silent. Then his eyes rolled back in his head and he appeared to be having a seizure. BUT... I’M... A...WOMAN... he said slowly, his voice becoming more low pitched. Alright take it outsi-, the employee didn’t have a chance to finish before he was impaled. There were screams of panic as the the man’s limbs beginning to snap at the joints and elongate before the video abruptly ended.

“Anyone else still inside?”

“Couple of people still unaccounted for. They may have been in the bathrooms when it happened.”

“Civilians,” he grumbled. “Always make things more difficult.” He opened his trench coat and pulled out a heavily modified Smith & Wesson model 500. Printed on the side was the passage, A woman shall not wear a man's garment, nor shall a man put on a woman's cloak, for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God - Deuteronomy 22:5.

“You going in alone?”, the chief asked.

“Always do,” he replied walking towards the restaurant. The downpour showed no sign of letting up.

“Sorry to ruin your day off.”

He gave up trying to light the damp cigarette and threw it to the ground. “Make it up to me later. What’s the situation?”

“Lunch rush, some nut in a dress tries to sneak into the women’s bathroom. Employee stops him. That’s when it all goes to shit. Based on witness reports we could be dealing with at least a class 4 mutation.”

“Great,” he muttered. “We got visuals inside?”

“Cameras are down, one of the diners got it on video.”

“Guess I better take a look.”

The video was shaky and low quality but showed exactly what the chief had described. An restaurant employee in a shouting match with a tall man in a dress and a wig. It looked like something out of a sketch comedy show. Sir you can’t go in there, the employee kept repeating. But I’m a woman, it was shouting back.

“How long does this go on for?”

“Another 15 minutes.”

“Skip to the end.”

The video now showed a crowd beginning to gather around the argument. Sir you CANNOT use the women’s bathroom, the employee said exasperatedly. You are a MAN in a dress. You need mental help. Do you want me to call 911? At that point the tall man stopped arguing and went silent. Then his eyes rolled back in his head and he appeared to be having a seizure. BUT... I’M... A...WOMAN... he said slowly, his voice becoming more low pitched. Alright take it outsi-, the employee didn’t have a chance to finish before he was impaled. There were screams of panic as the the man’s limbs began to snap at the joints and elongate before the video abruptly ended.

“Anyone else still inside?”

“Couple of people still unaccounted for. They may have been in the bathrooms when it happened.”

“Civilians,” he grumbled. “Always make things more difficult.” He opened his trench coat and pulled out a heavily modified Smith & Wesson model 500. Printed on the side was the passage, A woman shall not wear a man's garment, nor shall a man put on a woman's cloak, for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God - Deuteronomy 22:5.

“You going in alone?”, the chief asked.

“Always do,” he replied walking towards the restaurant. The downpour showed no sign of letting up.

>>17701334
His naivete drives the story.

>>17701334
He's got a really big dick. Now I know that doesn't sound like much of a flaw but he's also Scottish so his pecker keeps peeking out of his kilt and it's a bit difficult to keep his old chap in check.

>>17701334
He's a slut.

>>17701334
1. Lazy underachiever, cuts corners whenever he can
2. Thinks too highly of himself despite having nothing to back up his hubris
3. Won't admit his mistakes and will try to pass blame on others
4. Is me :(

>>17703501
saw it coming but I still let air through my nose

>>17701334
>Can't get over his dead wife
>Misanthropic nihilist
>Lost an arm

I think I'm trying too hard.

>female MC in anything that's not porn
I hope you don't do this

>>17704114
i dont want to write porn
but i do want to provide the fans with good material for making their own porn

>>17702797
Anger.

Kind of lost track of the plot on this one. I kept wanting to push it in different directions as I went. I think it's important to be able to see the scope of what you're writing so you know how much you can pack in. I had a hard time because I didn't firmly decide how long it should be
Also when did we start going through a thread a day?

See you guys tomorrow morning

>>17704114
Seems restrictive. Why would you do this?

>>17704809
Women don't have the mental depth required for a main character

>>17704809
virginity and resentment

>>17704840
hope she sees this post

>>17704852
>simp!
yeah dunno, wojack or something

i don't want to work with an editor it's too scary because there is embarrassing content in my work but it is that same embarrassing content that makes me think it would find a receptive audience

>>17702568
Well, let me tell you, it would make an okay short story.

>>17704903
Anon, you’re going to have to suck it up and work with an editor at some point.

>>17704903
I come to you sir with a solution. Simply log onto any of the plethora of sites full of embarrassing and objectionable written content, find an author there who has a grammatical style you enjoy, and offer them money.

>>17703501
So the average /lit/user?

>>17700842
>Any progress on your novels?
Averaging about 1000 words per day, and currently at 13,000 words with a plan for the next 24,000 and a rough sketch to get to 125,000 or more. I have no illusions about ever being published (only fantasies). However, I've noticed that on days when I get a decent writing session in, I don't think about death and dying or have suicidal ideation, so I think this is something that I'm going to stick with for the foreseeable future.

>>17705077
Have you thought of self-publishing?

>>17700842
Novel prgressing well enough. A lot of the bigger ideas are still formless, probably going to do a bit of research after draft one. Planned for a trilogy, self pubbed because I'm years away from being able to honestly write the novels I'd bother to tradpub.

>>17705077
Fix your diet

>>17705120
He's still only considering suicide; he's not that bad off yet

>>17704054
Sounds like max payne

>>17705128
The future is now old man.

>>17705128
There’s nothing wrong with self-publishing.

>>17704937
>>17704975
you're right. but i do have a concern that editing might actually take away some of its outsider qualities.

>>17703212
I recall reading this in the previous thread and giving some feedback. This version is greatly improved. My main complaint is that the flashbacks between present and the past aren't as clear-cut as they could be, and it took me a bit of effort to sort them out. It might also be improved by switching the order of scenes a bit. Usually it makes sense to start with an action scene and then move into description, but this time it might be better for the reader to know that the town has recently been devastated. I think you'd be able to provoke more curiosity by starting with a scene of Erica foraging through the town, spotting the wizard, and then cautiously attempting to follow him because wizards know things and he might lead her to food. Flashbacks of what wizards did to her friends, to establish the risk of following the wizard. The wizard confronts Erica, and she stands her ground, which leads into the opening you wrote.

This story hit me on a personal level because I was often very hungry as a kid and did a lot of things I'm not proud of to get food. The world seems so cold and uncaring to a hungry child, and you've captured that feeling well. Lying, begging, cheating, stealing. It all felt so right in the moment, so justified, and now as an adult I find myself with memories of starvation and shame where others have comfort and pride. I can't count the number of times other kids spit on food and then offered it to me to see if I'd eat it. I'd like to see the story continued.

I JUST KEEP GETTING STUCK HOLY FUCKING SHIT MAKE IT STOP

>>17705287
you must choose. you may maintain multiple paths and cut them off as they become less viable but you must choose.

>>17705349
I literally just cannot let go and write

Maybe its beacuse i dont have a precise plan for my work, is it beacuse of that?

>>17705399
We don't know you or your process, anon. We can't give advice on anything but the information you give us. If we perceive you as projecting and admitting the fact that you don't have a precise plan, then that's what we are going to go with. Without more information it's a shot in the dark to help you diagnose your issue.

You continue to get stuck, stuck as in what to write next immediately? Like the next word? Or stuck as in the next paragraph? The next scene? How the scene ties into the book overall? We don't know what you mean by 'stuck'. Tell us, specifically what you mean.

>I don't have a precise plan for my work
This implies that you have a vague plan for your work. Has your best writing been by your coat tails or after long periods of planning? Do you get bored by having planned everything out already or are you just procrastinating? Again, we don't know unless you tell us.

The anon from the other thread said that some anons 'blogpost' but the problem with that is advice like this is dependent on context of the individual. We could all reply 'just write' as other anons mindlessly reply 'based', but none of that helps this anon with his story.

>>17705445
Yeah i get what you mean

I just get stuck on the next word or the next sentence, then i get pissed off at my writting and delete all of it and start over

I have a scene in mind, i know what i want to convey with this scene but the words just wont come to me

I have a vague plan for the story but i know what i want to convey and i know what i want to do for every scene BUT THE WORDS DONT FORM

>>17705501
Try giving me the elevator pitch of the scene you are currently working on. Don't write it, but describe it to me. It could be an outline, or talking points. Just tell me what's supposed to happen.

>>17705519
Its like an introduction to the setting of the book and our main character - aloof military officer gets picked up by a trucker on his way to his next posting

It is supposed to depict the setting via descriptions - everything is completely bombed out, you can't really use the main roads, soldiers laying around in burned out buildings etc...

This is further expanded upon by the conversation he has with this trucker guy

>>17705559
Okay, now take that and add to it. List off more descriptions. Jot down a few things they would say to each other in the truck. Give me some snippets of how the truck bounces every few yards. What are they talking about? Again, not writing it, just telling me as if we were hanging out, waiting in line.

>>17705589
Well first the trucker gets asked where he is headed, officer answers gets onboard

Its a quiet drive for a couple of minutes then they begin exchanging snippets of information - rumors of an upcoming offensive, mortar attack left a lot of guys dead

Trucker guy talks about where he's heading (picking up some guys from a construction unit), they try to barter some items from eachother etc...

>open up something I was really proud of last year
>it's cringe
yup, it happened again guys

>>17705676
edit

>>17705676
Learn from it.

>>17705676
What was it about?

>>17702740
No, just lazy. Also I can write 900-1500 words in an hour so I still clock out with a good amount of words at the end of the week

>>17705139
Seriously, I don't understand the stigma against self-publishing.

>try the post nut clarity trick
>jerk off but don't get the post nut clarity
bros.....

>>17706029
It’s just elitism and gate-keeping, you see it in every community

>>17706117
Maybe by clarity they mean suicidal thoughts.

>>17706163
No, no, I've felt post nut clarity but I'm not getting it for some reason.
I'm just feeling less horny but that's just me most of the day on most days.

>>17706117
what is the post nut clarity trick? you wank and then write a book? that's a lot of wanking.

Good news /wg/! I've come up with a dorky little side quest to start my next book on give my first act some fun and magic while still sticking to the themes of the story (and throwing in a really stupid chekov's gun)

>>17705628
Not the same guy but sounds pretty good, I think itd make a sweet short story, perhaps the items they barter could shed light on what the current situation is like, what is scarce and what these two worlds have in abundance that they can barter for what they want

>>17706117
>>17706189
I literally only write after I’ve wanked

>>17706189
Yeah, pretty much just that.
Some guy posted a coomer berserker wojak with the concept like two threads ago.

>>17706117
This isn't /coom/ general fuck off

>>17704903
I don't want to work with an editor because I don't want to pay someone for what I'm convinced I could do myself if I just let it sit for a few weeks or a month and come back to it.

>>17706220
First time I heard there's a /coom/.
I'm not interested in that anyway.

>>17706211
i hope you codify the effort in your preface.
>this book was fueled by 1,237 wank sessions, i cranked it like a chinese bitcoin farmer.

>>17706145
You would think that would go away when the only writers in these threads are animefags.

>>17706191
>dorky little side quest
Do you mean subplot?

>>17706287
The animefags write, everyone else dreams of being a "writer". In 10 years the animefags will at least have 1 million words of practice, and the baffling amateur elitist will have at most a half finished manuscript.
Hopefully the self publishing genrefiction guys can start finishing and posting some of their stuff to break up the monotony(it's me)

Man, I've made a mess of my draft.
I tried going into it to add some stuff but I don't know where to start.
fug

>>17706373
The second draft is the hardest not because of what you need to trim, but because of what gets added.

>>17701334
>Has a hard time truly relating to other people
>Eccentric
>Has weak as fuck bones
>Dreamy, gets caught up in his thought

>>17706373
this is essential agony. you must endure it.

>>17706386
For real.
I am baffled at what to do with it.

>>17706397
I started another one that will be completely out of order and I'll organize it later.
Am I a retart :)??

>>17706363
Most people here are in love with being a writer. But most of them don’t write, and if called out on it fall back on some generic reason why they don’t post. Is it any wonder why animefags are dominating these threads?

>>17706334
when i hear "subplot" i think some small thread of a plot that gets brought up and developed every now and then but isnt the main one. im calling this a "side quest" because its more of a one-and-done thing that's only there to establish the MC's motivations rather than to further the plot

>>17706393
Unironically sounds like a self-insert.

>>17706510
all fiction is autobiographical

>>17706521
There literally isn’t a single character in any of my stories who are anything like me

>>17706363
You might be right, but it doesn't matter, because it's plainly evident that your criticism doesn't come from a place of genuine belief in yourself or your ideas, it comes from insecurity. Rather than embrace the truth (the vast majority of altpub literature is inferior to mainstream) and work to change reality (by asking why that is and what you can do on a personal level to fight that perception [beyond just feverishly insisting that it isn't true]), you'd prefer to ignore centuries of literary theory, criticism, and development and instead decide to judge progress on one single factor. A single factor which, coincidentally, would just happen to make you superior to everyone else if it were to be considered the most important factor.

People like you are the reason self-publishing isn't taken seriously.

>>17706373
Read it once all the way through, section by section, chapter by chapter. Then read it through a second time, stopping at each sentence and validating it for quality assurance. Proceed to do the same for the paragraph and so on.

People tend to think of creative writing as this sort of formless process of inspiration. In fact it's algorithmic and procedural just as imaginative and intuitive. You can see real results by applying a method.

>>17706287
>>17706363
When did this meme start? I write everyday and I’ve never even seen an anime. Conversely I haven’t seen an “anime story” on here, whatever the hell that even is.

>>17706528
your work is like you

Is it better to be autistic about details or is it fine to leave things that aren't absolutely crucial in the air?

I'm writing this short subplot about a guy using the money he got from killing an alien impersonating a pet cat to buy a replacement and I started wondering if it would be necessary at all to go over the expenses.

>>17706537
Are you fighting your personal demons in public? Because this can't be a response to anything I've said. You've clearly got some deep seated resentment towards non trad publishing. Work that out with a therapist and stop projectile vomiting in every /wg/. This is a thread for people writing books.
>>17706550
Most progress posts come from serial writers. Think it started in October maybe.

>>17706545
My main issue is that the draft I was working on right now was actually of the storyline and bible of my current project but my story has some holes that make me question where to fill in right now and what to allow to remain hollow until later.

>>17705242
Thanks for the feedback. Flashbacks can be disorienting, but I justified it because PTSD happens when you least expect it. The person suffering can lose their sense of time and place and it's understandable how this can be an ass to read.

That aside. Erica was designed as the antagonist and the young wizard is the MC. Both characters go separate paths, wizard goes on a quest to uncover the truth for the devastated town and Erica meets up with her abusers.

MC's backstory is that he was disowned by his family because of reasons. He doesn't truly empathise with lower class people. He's questing for a way back into the nobility, but the more truth he uncovers, the more dangerous it becomes and he's hunted.

Erica is the hunter. She's brainwashed by her abusers and (initially) believes that they're unwilling servants in a corrupted bureaucracy. She takes on their assassination quests to kill nobles (which is a simple power struggle in reality).

The story ends with moral questions. The most powerful nobles have access to magical artefacts that they can't reverse engineer, so a couple hundred kids are being sacrificed yearly to experiment with the artefacts' powers and maintain a balance of power between nobles. The storm that gets mentioned is a natural disaster that can be prevented through use of magical artefacts. The moral question: sacrifice 100 children or let towns and cities be destroyed?

MC goes with the logical decision and lets children die. Erica kills the MC because she's hateful.

>>17706579
Not sure what you mean by it being "of the storyline" and its "bible." Is it sort of like background lore?

On the one hand it seems that your current draft is dependent on your storyline. It therefore makes more sense to treat the storyline as the source of truth .

Alternatively, since this bible forms its mythology, the storyline should be retconned to be consistent with it. Whichever approach requires the fewest changes and the least rewriting.

>>17706560
>no u
I do strongly resent most self-published novels. I love literature, and I think it plays an important part in our society. It irritates me to see people proudly lowering the bar of one of my passions. You won't embarrass me by mocking my devotion to the craft, for it is a source of pride for me.

There is nothing inherently wrong with going outside of traditional publishing. I believe that self-publishing could represent a much-needed outlet for outsider authors to present genuinely controversial views to the world. However, to date I have seen nothing self-published which could not have been traditionally published had the authors taken the time to bring it up to a minimal standard of quality. At present, self-publishing is the sewer of the literary world, and that will never change so long as there are retards like you proudly defending the status quo.

The fact that retards keep shitting up these threads with progress posts about their cliche drolling fantasy serials does not at all redeem your views, it only confirms that they are attention-starved autistics who won't take a hint.

>>17706637
So many places to bitch about this and you choose the general dedicated to writing. Be autistic and embarrassing elsewhere, or if you want, continue being to court jester in every /wg/ for the next decade. Not like you have any friends to meet, any hobbies to pursue, any books to write.
Last (you).

>>17706637
i've never seen a post go from cope to based like this

>>17702797
media res is a technique to start the story, not where you start it

>>17706590
>MC goes with the logical decision and lets children die. Erica kills the MC because she's hateful.
Would be more impactful if the MC isn’t a sociopath.

>>17706613
>Not sure what you mean by it being "of the storyline" and its "bible." Is it sort of like background lore?
That and an abridged form of the story to go in and out to flesh it out later.

>>17702797
if this happened to me i would simply say i suddenly had a terrible headache in my left eye and dismiss myself to ask /lit/ how i ought to proceed

>>17706560
>Most progress posts come from serial writers.
Maybe so, not that I've noticed that personally, but it doesn't mean that animefags are the only ones writing. I've never seen any proof that that's the case.

>>17706665
>Not like you have any friends to meet, any hobbies to pursue, any books to write.
Dude... why'd you have to call me out like that? For fifty years I have been trapped in a bubble of loneliness, never speaking to anyone, never trying anything new or learning any skills. I don't even play video games. I've never finished watching an entire television episode. Lately I've been banging my head against the wall trying desperately to think of a book idea so I could get famous and maybe then would people like me. And then I found /wg/. "Finally," I thought. "A place where I can pretend to live my dreams of being a writer. Nobody will ever know how pathetic I am in real life." But then came the animefags, so boldy doing that which I cannot not: churning out words of poorly written cliche garbage. I couldn't handle it. So much rage and envy began to bubble inside of me. I thought if I used a bunch of big words and long paragraphs, you would all be too confused to see through my ruse. But then came you, a valiant knight atop a white steed, charging forth to strike down my facade of intelligence and revealing the deranged lunatic within for all to see. Great. Probably gonna kill myself now.

>>17706737
Logical from a reader perspective. In character, he makes the choice because lower class children are worthless and it's okay for them to die over upper class people.

>>17706783
it's just anime fags getting uppity because we keep shitting on anime fags. they had to rally to defend themselves. it's a good thing in the sense that it keeps them from going back to writing more anime garbage.

>>17706841
>Logical from a reader perspective
Anon, you might be sociopathic

Thinking of it, how believable would it be for a pet to be successfully replaced by another animal that looks really similar to it? Like, if you replaced a black tomcat with green eyes with another black tomcat with green eyes, would most people be able to tell?
I had a cat but I never had to part ways with him and then get back, and he had a very peculiar fur pattern anyway so I have no idea what would be the possibilities of even finding a "copy".

Should I go ask /an/?

>>17706869
>we
ok old man
most people here want to write and discuss writing, not live out their high school fantasy of being at the center of some clique war.

>>17706959
you seem game to partake

First hundred posts: can I get feedback?
Second hundred posts: fuck your opinions and fuck you
Third hundred posts: can I get feedback?
Looks like another successful /wg/. Keep up the good work lads.

>>17706955
I have two cats, and they both have very idiosyncratic behaviors. Even if they looked identical I could tell them apart almost as soon as they stopped sleeping.

Cyberpunk fiction in 2021 - yay or nay? Why?

>>17707037
We've probably hit market saturation on that one. Bladerunner 4 years ago, the Cyberpunk 2077 flop a few months ago. People are probably sick of hearing about it. Like writing about Zombies in 2014

>>17707060
that's a good point i think i will write zombie fiction instead

>>17707060
>1 movie
>1 game
>saturation

Le what now. There's barely any /lit/ cpunk media at all.

burgerpunk bros...

>>17707032
Damn. Seems like I jumped right into a corner.

>>17707086
I was trying to bookend the cyberpunk era, not summarize it. I just skipped over the multiple cyberpunk netflix series, Ready Player One, Ghost in the Shell movie, the myriad of cyberpunk movies the world has already forgotten. The genre saw a recent massive revival and it probably peaked/fizzled out when the defining video game limped to the finish,

>>17706914
nothing wrong with being a sociopath. i would love to read a story about a properly sociopathic character and not some hollywood murderer trope. sociopaths are quite smart i think. they don't bother wasting emotional energy on people and things that we don't care about.

>>17707037
people certainly have a taste for it but in my estimation the demands of the genre, in order for a piece to attract attention, have grown to fairly lofty heights. i don't want to become gnostic or take heroic doses of hallucinogens to leave mankind behind or become trans in order to write a couple short stories. if you can do it then all the more power to you but i will stick to ghost stories.

>>17707119
>Ready Player One, Ghost in the Shell movie
...I'm not sure those are even worthy of mention frankly.

I dunno, I genuinely think the "hard-boiled detective noir" plus "future tech" combination is a massive and obvious hole in the market right now, but not sure how to bring something new to the genre that doesn't just rehash 80s "megacorp bad" tropes.

>>17707164
>the demands of the genre, in order for a piece to attract attention, have grown to fairly lofty heights. i don't want to become gnostic or take heroic doses of hallucinogens to leave mankind behind or become trans in order to write a couple short stories
Yeah me neither. It's a pity that cpunk has gotten so... what's the word... typecast?

>>17707383
>Yeah me neither. It's a pity that cpunk has gotten so... what's the word... typecast?
It was typecast from the very beginning.

>>17707148
>sociopaths are quite smart i think.
No, only a small percentage of them. Who are then dubbed high-function. Low-function sociopaths are the norm and retarded as fuck.

>t.writing a sociopathic character

>>17707148
>>17707444
>le high-functioning sociopath meme

Too often used simply to excuse boorish behaviour.

>>17706797
You enjoy this too much. P(r)etty based though.

>>17705676
post it

I am not an animefag but I write

>>17707744
oh yeah? prove it

I hate anime and I will write and I whate I write will honestly probably be of similar quality to the animefags but that's cause of my genre and target demographic I could definitely write literary fiction, the best literary fiction you've ever read, if I tried full stop.

>>17707751
here you go >>17687990

>>17701334
>liar
>unlikeable piece of shit
>miserable
>bitter

>>17701334
she farted in gym class

>>17707784
in the pic, indicate who's talking in the bottom dialogue exchange.

in the full text:
>“You know how Auntie gets.” Johnny set the cage on the countertop. “She said hi.”
should have a comma instead of period after 'gets' and no period after 'countertop' and lowercase the 'she' as a result.
>She sighed. “How about you do something useful for the store instead?”
kinda same thing, maybe reword it as
“How about you do something useful for the store instead?” She said with a heavy sigh. Auntie surveyed the cages that hung around her. She unhooked the one with a couple of songbirds, set it down on the counter, and covered it with a black cloth.

Which brings me to my next point: don't be afraid to combine 1-2 sentence paragraphs together and don't be afraid of combining actions into paragraphs like the part with the parrot actions and the coinciding dialogue. You can in theory cram a bunch of actions into a paragraph, but absolutely do a new paragraph whenever someone new speaks. Also, this is just my preference for dialogue, but I'd spice up dialogue with cuts to characters doing stuff, make it more 'rich', but it might not work for you.

>>17700842
behead vtubers and their apologists

>>17707869
thanks for reading the whole thing, anon.

>“You know how Auntie gets.” Johnny set the cage on the countertop. “She said hi.”
should have a comma instead of period after 'gets' and no period after 'countertop' and lowercase the 'she' as a result.
so like this?
>"You know how Auntie gets," Johnny set the cage on the countertop, "she said hi."
hence
>"You know how Auntie gets, she said hi."
a bit run-on, don't you think? agree with your second point, though.

>don't be afraid to combine 1-2 sentence paragraphs together
i was aiming for breathing room and emphasis. guess it didn't work very well?

>but absolutely do a new paragraph whenever someone new speaks
i thought i was doing that already. unless, i did substitute actions and dialogue in the later part. is that what you meant?

>spice up dialogue with cuts to characters doing stuff
i understand. i've seen good examples of this but for now i end up overdescribing shit and making the dialogue slow down and lose focus. good advice, though.

is the dialogue okay? which one is the weakest?
did the ending make you feel anything?

thanks for your thoughts. if you want me to do the same for your work i'd be happy to.

>>17707762
Calm down John Green.

>>17707979
>so like this?
I would do it as no comma after countertop, and even Grammarly gets picky about dialogue punctuation. I think it just boils down to style.
>You know how Auntie gets," Johnny set the cage on the countertop "she said hi."
>You know how Auntie gets," Johnny set the cage on the countertop, "she said hi."


>i was aiming for breathing room and emphasis. guess it didn't work very well?
I think it's a situational thing. If you do it too much (and this is namely paragraph breaks after dialogue from what I noticed) then it appears kind of ameaturish. Only the most really anal, really picky readers on their high-horses with stiff hard-ons for prose will particularly care, though.

>i thought i was doing that already
No, you're fine. It's just a supplementary point.

>is the dialogue okay? which one is the weakest?
Again, this is just personal preference/pickiness, but I think a lot of dialogue is lackluster. It's remarkably short and concise, which isn't particularly a bad thing. I think your dialogue where the characters finish with doing body language/tone/action is good prose-wise. On a somewhat related note, there's a lot of 'he' and 'she'. I think it wouldn't hurt to throw their names in and mix it up with a description of their character here and there.

>did the ending make you feel anything?
frankly, no, but it's not your fault. I'm just too autistic.

>thanks for your thoughts. if you want me to do the same for your work i'd be happy to.
I don't think it would really be fair for either of us since a lot of stuff I pointed out is glaring in my early chapters and there's over 240k words

>>17708370
>You know how Auntie gets," Johnny set the cage on the countertop "she said hi."
didn't know this was legal. alright

>frankly, no, but it's not your fault. I'm just too autistic.
don't sell yourself short. you make lots of good points and confirmed my own suspicions. the story didn't have a very good buildup after all

thanks again anon and best of luck.

This has been honestly, a comfy /wg/

>>17708370
>I would do it as no comma after countertop
A comma is recommended, especially in this case when a pause is indicated.

>>17707037
Cyberpunk is way overdone now. I just don't see it happening.

>>17707383
>hard-boiled detective noir" plus "future tech"
Do you mean Tech-noir?

>>17706955
>Should I go ask /an/?
Better safe than sorry, anon, I would ask for advice.

>>17707450
>Too often used simply to excuse boorish behaviour.
High-functioning sociopaths are a thing in real life. And are nothing like low-function sociopaths.

Can I get some honest crit on this?

https://childhoodfriendpublications.wordpress.com/

I keep only getting praise when asking my readers but I feel like my writing is lacking in many areas and I would like to know where to improve.

Warning it's NTR.

>>17708757
>Warning it's NTR.
Going to be honest with you, already starting out bad. Given how much NTR is hated.

>>17708757
>NTR.
?

>>17708757
>Warning it's NTR.

>>17708765
Not really going for popularity here. I'm aware that it's a niche. I'm rather looking for feedback on the pacing and prose in general.

>>17708765
>>17708790
>>17708811
NTR is a man’s fetish, you three are clearly children.

>>17708859
Just the first chapter or all the chapters? I mean, not to assume, but are your fans okay with it? Because if they like it, you shouldn’t worry about it.

>>17708714
I didn't say they didn't exist

>>17708876
>a man's fetish
>heroine is a petite 15 year old girl

>>17708919
So far I only got positive feedback for it, but I imagine much if that is the niche factor.
It's probably a bit much to ask for you guys to read over 100 pages, so I'd be happy with just getting feedback on the beginning.

>>17708941
*static noise*
*telephone click*
[French Accent] "Post ze graph."

>>17708941
I know it’s hard for you to understand, considering you had no proper highschool life, but women steal men from other women. It’s a common occurrence, even at adolescence.

https://discord.com/invite/baMD76mMT5

https://discord.com/invite/X3xujhKfNJ

>>17708996
typical weeb, are you all perverts? Every time I run in to one, there is always something wrong with them. The one that makes these threads is a skitzo.

>>17709101
The commonality is posting here, not weebery. There is something wrong with you too, you wouldn't be here otherwise

>>17708757
>>17708859
>Can I get some honest crit on this?
>I'm rather looking for feedback on the pacing and prose in general.
I managed to read the first chapter and pacing and prose are the least of your worries. I say grammar is your more pressing concern. There are some mistakes, some of them, egregious. You need to learn to italicize thoughts. Not only that, but you need to stop misusing punctuation in complex sentences, and quotation marks.

If you don't mind, this is how your first chapter should be presented. I haven't fix everything, that would take a bit, just giving you a rudimentary rundown. Have you thought of getting a beta reader?

>>17709142
Whatever you say. If it helps you sleep at night. Why not.

>>17709101
>The one that makes these threads is a skitzo
Still can’t get over the fact you guys still seethe because of the OP pic.

He could barely stand to look at her disgusting body. The result of Decades of cheap wine and grocery store candy on full display. Her makeup if it could even be called that was also a write off. It looked less like something that had been deliberately applied and more like she had been ambushed by a rogue clown with a bucket of mixed paints.

She looked down at him with disgust. “So you want to be a better writer?”

“Yes mistress,” he whimpered.

“Step one, to be a better writer...,” she paused for dramatic effect, “YOU NEED TO BE A GOOD WRITER!”

With just this single piece of nonsense advice he was already erect. “Please mistress more!”

“Step two, know that your writing is bad and will always BE bad. Trust me nobody cares except you.”

He felt his dick become wet with pre-cum. Only two pieces of advice in and he was already reaching his limit.

“STEP THREE MISTRESS PLEASE!”, he shouted desperately.

A grin spread across her wrinkled face. Every one of her features contorting into an exaggerated caricature of a stereotypical middle aged woman. With her round face and poorly dyed orange hair she looked like a pumpkin that someone had forgotten to throw out after Halloween. “Step three, NEVER self publish EVER!”

This was all it took. He came so strongly he thought he was going to dislocate something. His wasted cum splattered onto the cheap carpet.

She grabbed one of her works off the table and tore out several pages. “Clean that up,” she ordered.

As he did so he caught glimpses of the writing. Utter garbage. Seeing it immediately made his dick begin to harden again.

“Step four...”

He was shaking with anticipation. “PLEASE ALEXA!” he screamed interrupting her.

She ignored this and continued. “If you want to be original you need to read what others have written.”

He wasn’t even fully hard as he began cumming uncontrollably. As he felt himself losing consciousness his mind inadvertently flashed an image of what she might look like naked. He lay on his back unable to move as the contents of his stomach came rushing up.

>>17709150
Forgot to mention this, but you need a line break for the flashback portion, switching from present tense to past tense is a big no

Something like *** would suffice.

>>17709150
Thanks for the feedback, I'll compare that to what I wrote tomorrow.
Can you give me an example of a grammatical error I'm making? That should definitely be the first thing to improve.

>>17708946
Tell us how you got those fans.

>>17709150
>You need to learn to italicize thoughts
lol no

>>17709175
I don't think it's necessary to capitalize when you want someone to scream. The exclamation point is enough I would say.

>>17709293
It's a habit I need to break.

>>17709306
Just skimmed what you write, I also recommend quitting.

>>17709325
>wrote
,,,,

>>17709329
sue me.

>>17709325
>what you write
You're going to critique someone's writing when you can barely even speak English?

>>17709191
>Can you give me an example of a grammatical error I'm making? That should definitely be the first thing to improve.
I feel like someone else can explain it better than me, but I'll give it my best. In the last paragraph, you went from present tense to past tense. When the first part of the story was present tense, whereas the flashback scene was past tense. The last paragraph takes in the present time, yet you wrote it in the past tense.

“(No more of this.)” Italicize it.

>>17708757
How long did it take you to get your viewers?

>>17709334
im not speaking and the i is next to the o, i don't proof read my post.

>>17709306
i'm a capitalizer too. they aren't ready for us yet. we will be proven right in time.

>>17709351
Is WordPress even better than Royal Road?

>>17709358
All caps are good for creating a jarring snap
If you use it more than once it loses all effect

>>17709371
No, Royal Road is superior.

>>17708757
>https://childhoodfriendpublications.wordpress.com/
Why Wordpress? Wouldn't Royal Road or any other weeb website be better?

>>17709371
>not using both
>not posting to every single front possible
bro?

>>17709371
No. You have to put in effort for search engine optimisation if you want your site to get clicks. A ton of WordPress blogs go unnoticed because of poor SEO. RR doesn't allow porn, so WordPress is good in this area.

>>17709401
>RR doesn't allow porn, so WordPress is good in this area.
I literally read stories that have sex scenes in RR

>>17709394
Wouldn't it be better to post it on Spacebattle or sufficient velocity

The last few days have been super slow for me. I've been sitting down and writing but I've only been pinching off 600 words or so each day, which is terrible, since I know I can do 2k-4k. How do I reset and get back to my usual pace? Should I just jump ahead a few chapters and start fresh, or are there better ways? I have a good outline, so it's not like I'm blocked on serious issues; I just don't feel as confident as I did for the first 20k words.

>>17709409
Was it 100% smutty porn? They'll allow sex scenes if it's a small part of the story. There's even rape but I'm pretty sure it's not allowed to be explicit. Last I heard, it scared advertisers.

>>17709444
It seems you're burned out and you don't know it.

>>17709448
>Was it 100% smutty porn?
No, there was an actually story being told, but I remember the author basically telling his viewers if they want sex scenes and when they said yes, pretty much wrote it.

>>17709444
Probably spend weeks in this rut because you're too arrogant to just take a rest

>>17709456
I think I know what story you’re referring too, chest something.

>>17709449
>>17709460
Weak. Burnout isn't some incurable medical condition. 600 words in a day is a break.

>>17709456
Alright. I'm mistaken about the explicit stuff. You still can't write pure porn on RR though.

>>17709481
No, a break is not writing for like a week. If you're not resting but still writing, you're still working.

>>17709481
Ok idiot
Power through then. Not like everyone else knows that effective rest is more efficient in the long term than extending your burn out
If you're writing 600 words a day instead of 2k, it'll take you 3 days to make up for the loss you made in one day, during which you are accumulating more lost value
Just rest

>>17709482
Ah, that much is a give. Not like I'm complaining, there's plenty of sites that allow erotica.

>>17709493
If they haven't learned to effectively rest, they'll just end up anxious and feeling guilty the whole time and come back just as bad
Adults who haven't learned to rest are pretty much resigned to a lifetime of feeling tired and slogging ineffectually through their work
Anon is pretty much fucked because of subscribing to labor slave brain rot

>>17709501
It's the sunk-cost fallacy.

>>17709481
Just take a small break, it won't hurt you.

>>17708936
With the way you said it implied it.

>>17708757
You rush too much to get to the NTR parts. The first chapter alone could have been several chapters for the inevitable NTR, but you just rush it. And the MC seems readily to accept his place as a cuck, as well as the heroine.

>>17707864
How is that a flaw? It’s more like a fuck-up.

>>17709481
Even 1 word a day is not a break.

>>17709538
Ignore him, he will soon learn.

>>17709523
nah you just got shit reading comp and reacted to a conclusion that only exists in your head like a /lit/ard
>>17708714
what the fuck is a low functioning sociopath? crippled and unable to join society because they don't empathize? or just someone who's volatile and impulsive in their treatment of others?

>>17709482
Kinda creeped out that there’s no age-limit on that site.

>>17709541
He will suffer and learn or suffer and double down
Either way, fuck him 'til he gets over himself

>>17709542
>low functioning sociopath?
Thus, low-functioning sociopaths would be poorly integrated into society. It may also refer to impulse control, which the low-functioning do not have, having a hard time delaying rewards.

On the other side, high-functioning sociopaths are well integrated into society, they have good impulse control, being able to delay rewards.

>>17709548
Yeah but he’s going to bitch here later.

>>17709542
You need to read more books on sociopaths if you don't know.

>>17709433
No, they have restrictions.

>>17709481
>Burnout isn't some incurable medical condition
What is depression.

>>17709444
Nice humblebrag. I can write 600 a day, when normally I would write 2k.

>>17709561
Sloth and a need for attention.

>>17709546
american?
>rules specifically designed to allow only tasteful depictions of sex
>THINK OF THE CHILDREN
repression just makes reactionaries, don't be such a weirdo. it's just sex

>>17709550
makes sense. sounds like it describes 80% of poor people, at least in my experience
>>17709555
yeah probably do but I don't fetishize and find aesthetics in the mentally retarded so I'd rather use my time on something else

>>17709501
>Anon is pretty much fucked because of subscribing to labor slave brain rot
Sounds like the majority of the pseudos on /lit/ to be honest.

New thread >>17709572

>>17709568
>sounds like it describes 80% of poor people, at least in my experience
Are you pretending to be retarded?

>>17709591
You don’t have to announce it, we’ll go at our own pace, fucking hell.

>>17709598
Just is just shitposting, ignore him.

>>17709598
>factor results in social failure and exclusion
>so all the poor must be sociopaths
doesn't into correlation and causation or just pretending to be retarded?

>>17709568
>yeah probably do but I don't fetishize and find aesthetics in the mentally retarded so I'd rather use my time on something else
So you'll write about something you have no idea about and you don't think it's a bad idea.

>>17709637
i'm not edgy teenage-kun
just wanted to know, cool your jets

>>17709615
Pull yourself up by your bootstraps. President Trump had to ski to school and read his homework by candle light. Elon Musk was born in the favela and survived polio.

>>17709649
How is learning about something you'll write edgy? By the sounds of it, your story will be a trainwreck if you can half-ass research.

>>17709651
t. has never spent time around poor people
people are irritable and impulsive. apathy and abuse are everyday
>but my underdog story!
>my fetishization of the proletariat!
when your down, there're few things you hate more than the middle class who infantilize you
i'm not some american cuck who follows government mantra, right or left. I don't mean to imply that poor people are in their circumstances because they're all born with that nature, more likely is that shit living makes you mean

>>17709656
i'm not edgy teenage-kun
not the one the american psycho clone
boost your reading comp, christ

>>17709550
>Thus
...

>>17709603
It's useful to have a link on the old thread, like every regular general does on this board

>>17709670
>i'm not some american cuck
What are you then? A European cuck?

>>17709670
>t. has never spent time around poor people
If you actually read my post you'll find it's laced with about seventeen layers of irony and that I am in fact on your side.

>>17709656
By the sounds of it, you have trouble reading, let alone writing

>>17709684
We were doing fine without it. Just because you’re lazy to look up the catalog doesn’t mean you have to announce it here.

>>17709693
false flagging as an average america is a pretty vague narrative tool
sorry my analysis skills weren't up to the task

>>17709705
>doing so "fine" the last thread accidentally split into 2

So I guess this is how society regresses.

>>17709710
The part where I talked about Trump as if he were Lincoln and said Musk was born in a fucking favela should've clued you in my man

>>17709723
I thought you were an american who cheers for the blue football team pretending to be a fan of the red football team
their narrative tends to be
>the poor are precious little babies
>don't say mean things about them!
>anyone who says mean things are a red who wants them to just work harder!
guess I latched onto the wrong thing

>>17709718
>>doing so "fine" the last thread accidentally split into 2
You mean the one where the anti-animefag made a thread before the bump limit just so he could preempt animefag and failing horrendously?

>>17709736
You mean, you were so butthurt you couldn't make it first, you samefagged your newer thread until the other one fell off the board?

>>17709827
Sure, anon, this is like fourth time I remember you anti-animefags creating a thread and being BTFO. But no, it has to be samefag.

>>17709561
Burning out = depression? Or are you diagnosing him based on the fact that his productivity has dipped slightly?

>>17709444
I don't necessarily agree with the others about resting (though it can sometimes help). I've been there before and one day it just clicked and came back to me so maybe just keep trying if that's what you feel. Alternatively, I used to find switching to short stories for a day or two would help reignite the writing in my main project. Try something new that excites you. Try a few things out and don't let anons tell you what is 'objectively' the right solution for you.

>>17709718
That wasn't an accident, both threads were posted in the previous thread.