/lit/ - Literature

Your probably the first person who ever read it all the way through. Any "twist" hype was made by F. Gardner himself.

>>17487007
I’m not all the way through. I’m only half way. That’s part of why I’m so pissed. I knew there was supposed to be some kind of twist. Twists are supposed to be at the ending! I can’t believe someone fucked that part up. Maybe there’s another twist at the end but I’m pretty certain this has to be the part I’ve heard about. It’s one of those “weird just for the sake of being weird” type twists that I can’t stand.

>>17487002
Read some real indie horror.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08TGBGGF8

>>17487989
john, kindly eat your own shit. and stfu with the excessive shilling.

>>17487031
How do you know that your twist is the final twist? I only got to the 25% mark myself though, congrats on suffering as far as you did

>>17488898
Nah I can shill endlessly now.
>>17488864

>>17487002
>>17487007
>>17487031
>>17487989
>>17488929
>>17488915
gtfo samefag

I give him credit for originality in the twist. I can’t think of any other story which does the same thing. For better or worse he basically cane up with a new idea for a twist that’s never been done before. Call of the Arcade is significantly better because it doesn’t rely on the same gimmick. Haven’t read the others.

>>17487989
>Clearly inspired by Gardner's success
>Decide to insult him

What an asshole.

>>17487989
>Read some real indie horror.

Seems like more of a thriller, at least, that's what the kindle preview suggests. Nor does Amazon categorize it as horror.

>>17490123
This. I met Gardner in the Writing General. After talking to him he gave me a positive review for my poetry collection and even gave me the names of some good reviewers. They don’t review poetry but my point is he was trying to help me. This guy however is a total dick. Rather than choosing to do something similar to that he’s attempting to smear gardener’s books. I don’t understand why there are so many mean spirited losers from this site.

>>17490123
I doubt he's successful. 4chan ads are cheap, but so are his books. I'm guessing he's breaking about even.

>>17490341
>I don’t understand why there are so many mean spirited losers from this site.

Most of them are failures.

>>17490341
That just about sums up my thoughts. I might’ve read his book. I read Call of the Arcade because it was free. I don’t want to read whoever this guys book is at all now. Gardner’s a shill but at least he’s not a jerk who resorts to cheap shots like this.

Can someone spoil the twist for me. I dont want to read the book.

>>17490761
>I dont want to read the book.

Then why are you on /lit?

>>17487002
>did you guys meme that part too?
>you guys
>guys
>plural
kek

>>17492125
I was in a /lit discord with gardner. Everyone kisses his ass there. If you're still implying it's just him you're unfortunately wrong.

>>17492155
>/lit discord
Yikes.

>not read esoteric experimental erotica from /lit/ instead
>pic related
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08W3JQ369[/spoler]

>>17492383

>>17492392

>>17492392
>>17492405
horrible font, not reading.

I think Gardner is trying to get so much hate that the natural 4chan contrariness will kick in and people will ironically start buying his book.

>>17493131
or people started to notice there's better books out there

>>17493165

Why are you insulting gardener? He actually helps people with their writing in the Writing General. You're obviously trying to mimic him. Smart thing to do would be to make connections with others from this board. Any interested I ever had in reading your book is gone.

>>17490341
>he’s attempting to smear gardener’s books

It's just a silly meme, that didn't strike me as mean-spirited, much less a smear.

Gardner I'm warning you. I've put up with this shit for months, and now you've inspired another fucking shill to shill his books. I'm actually going crazy browsing this fucking catalog. I am THIS close to buying a VPN myself and gore-spamming every. single. one. of your threads. I'm serious.

>>17493207
Whatever, John, we all know it's you. Go shill your shitty book elsewhere

>>17493165

Let's see Gardner's books are 99 cents, and there are five of them. The author is a genuinely nice guy and offers constructive criticism.

The other guy has only 1 book that costs three dollars and is significantly shorter than any of Gardner's books. He's not a nice guy and resorts to cheap shots against fellow writers like that pic.

Good luck getting readers now.

>John David Card is literally a ghost and he's haunting 4chan because he died a day after he published his book.
Kino

>>17493193
Does he, help people with, their commas?

>>17493234
Go to the /lit discord and tell him that tough guy.

the fact thay these posts are always about "le twist" and not about the content of which, nor its actual merits, speaks shill from miles. /lit/ wouldn't fucking care about the god damn spoiler, because there are no fucking actual spoilers in books or films or whatever you absolute shill. Just shill the fuck out with your samefagging crap. Also I'm not even mad bitch

>>17493242
Just a disinterested third-party, anon ... or should I say, F. Gardner?

>>17493343
>Just a disinterested third-party, anon

No you're not. You're some asshole who decided to attack gardener's to shill his own book. I don't read gardener's shitty books. And I sure as hell am not going to read yours, buddy. If you're trying to make sure no one ever reads your crap, you're doing a goodjob.

>>17493460
yeah it's all but confirmed >>17493343
is definitely 'John David Card' (probably a fake name too)

No one has given a synopsis of the plot or the twists to any of his books. Look, I love the white race as much as the next guy, but I can’t keep posting in shilling threads by the author without someone posting fucking spoilers.

>>17487002
I recommend you read the superior Chad of the Crocodile

>>17493743
What are you talking about? This book has been posted on here for months. Every single time I come to this board you guys are talking about it. There’s excerpts of the writing in ads. Samples of the writing is easily accessible. Don’t encourage even more shilling.

>>17489987
Whats the twist?

>>17493743
A kid gets eaten by a crocodile on Halloween at an amusement park. One year later his family is haunted and stalked by anthropomorphic Crocodile.
There’s your synopsis.

>>17493847
Oh and Stephen King and JK Rowling are in it.

>>17493743
I've only read half of it, but here's what happens
> Two main characters are Mark and Johnny, age 18
> Johnny is damaged, he was raped or something in his childhood, he's very fragile and easily cries
> Mark is protective of him
> They go to haunted house and find a strange arcade machine after a half hour of wandering around
> Plotwise, it's surprisingly easy to find the Polybius considering it's supposed to be a top secret machine that has been hidden for 30 years
> My speculation is that Mark is the chosen one
> Arcade machine, or the Polybius, is no ordinary machine
> The Polybius a device planted by aliens and high government officials
> Sam is an older haunted house employee
> 30 years ago, Sam's little brother committed suicide after playing the Polybius too much
> Sam becomes obsessed with the Polybius games
> He gains the ability to hypothesize people and cause them to kill themselves
> He hypnotized his mother and friend, who then kill themselves
> Sam says he's part of a cult called the Ouroborus and asks Mark to give the Polybius to him
> Mark says no and he and Johnny run away
> Sam chases them but gets caught by the police
> members of Sam's cult had ratted him out to the police, wow such twist
> The next day, the two boys start a normal day at school, but Sam is back
> he's killing their classmates
> he escaped jail by hypnotizing the police and the guards and causing them to kill themselves

Then I stopped from boredom

>>17494026
Oh yeah, the Polybius is transferred onto a flash drive, Mark and Johhny aren't dragging around an arcade machine

>>17494026
This actually sounds really good. You just convinced me to give (((Gardner))) 99 cents.

>>17494039
All right, here is the rest of the story

> Mark, Johnny, and Sam all get real life Pokemon
> Shout commands at the Pokemon and they attack
> Sam dies
> Mark and Johnny take shelter in a room and .....
> It was all a creative writing presentation by Mark
> Mark's teacher gives him an A+
> Excellent work, Mark
> But then ......
> Mark is inside the Polybius, it was all a simulation, he's still in the haunted house
> Polybius tells Mark to kill himself, just like Sam's little brother
> Mark breaks free from the Polybius and then destroys the machine
> Johnny walks in, puzzled at why his friend is breaking a machine in the haunted house
> Mark says he doesn't want to tell that story

The end

>>17494142
I got it for (((free))) during one of Gardner's Kindle Select free book days

>>17493460
>>17493701
Confirmed for F. Gardner posting.

I've read the kappa and video game ones. They suck, but I can't stop reading the series. Can't tell if it's a psyop or if its some random 4chan idiot writing then

>>17493834
My panties

>>17494199
>Can't tell if it's a psyop or if its some random 4chan idiot writing then

Someone should write Gardner-style books that turn on this question.

>>17494199
I read Arcade and Cherokee. How does Kappa compare? At this point I'm definitely going to read another one of these. You guys have given me Gardner-Fever.

>>17494026
>>17494153
I just started reading the free copy I got of this book just to see if this checks out. I'm kind of just skimming through. I thought this was a joke. But holy shit it's checking out. It seems to be the actual plot. This is amazingly retarded. I half suspect you're gardner posting these himself. In any case, well done. I'm going to read Call of the Crocodile and hope this shit is just as ridiculous.

>>17494226
I wish I were Gardner. Imagine all the book sales money from the disposable income of 4chan neets

THE PLOT THICKENS
>>>/pol/307238845

>>17494217
Haven't read the Cherokee one. I like the arcade one more, but the kappa one is worth checking out for its weirdness. It's about a kid obsessed with Asian martial arts who has to fight what appears to be a kappa. The weeb has a mental breakdown, and a bunch of other shit happens.

>>17494213
NGL, I kinda want to myself

>>17494153
>"Congratulations Mark!"

Is this why he had that eva ad?

>>17494242
Reviewers are comparing People Mover to James Dickey's "To the White Sea."

High praise, indeed. Sounds like real /lit/, not a forced meme book, like certain other books in this thread.

>>17494265
To the White Sea is a great book. I'm going to have to check this People Mover book out.

>>17494259
I don't know what Eva ad you mean. Although I try not to look at G's ads. The teacher's exact words are
> You did a great job, Mark. Congratulations

>>17494278
>that bit where he asked if his story was too much, and his teachers response

>>17494265
>>17494272
i'm gonna wait until a drm-free pdf leaks.
fuck paying for books desu

>>17494247
Sounds cool. I'll start it tonight. Thanks.

>>17494026
This seems great. Why are there people from this board that don't like it?

>>17494439
It's a poorly written and edited series

>>17494320
Hope you like it in a "wtf am I reading" way, as much as I did

>>17494462
As long as it's fun to read, who cares? I just read the green texts and that sounds like a blast.

>>17494469
I actually enjoy them for what they are - the novella equivalent of a bmovie

Is F Gardner shilling from beyond the grave?

>>17494485
i still can't believe he's gone, gardnerbros. we got too cocky.

>>17494485
Turns out you can die from being too based

>>17494485
He's literally in the /lit discord channel that anyone on here can go on.

>>17494485
no, but John David Card might be, according to /pol/

>>17494485

>>17494509
lol copying Gardner even down to the fake obituary.

>>17494485
F
Gardner

>>17494509
that's lame as hell. meanwhile based gardner died trying to put on a sweater that was too complicated for him.

>>17494509
What the fuck, then who was shill?

>>17494530
Based retard.

>>17494530
He devotes his entire mental capacity to his writing. He doesn't need to devote any energy to pedestrian tasks like getting dressed

I SWEAR TO CHRIST SOMEONE POST THE PDF ARCHIVE OF PEOPLE MOVER NOW I WANT TO READ IT!!!

>>17494597
Calm down John

>>17494597
Sent

>>17494509
Gardner killed Card?

>>17494603
No lol

>>17494610
No, but Cardigan did

>>17494247
>It's about a kid obsessed with Asian martial arts who has to fight what appears to be a kappa. The weeb has a mental breakdown, and a bunch of other shit happens.

This is the greatest description of a book I've ever read.

>>17494509
People like you with your forced meme bs authors are ruining /lit/
Go shill somewhere else and let us discuss real literature in peace

>>17494688
Thanks. Wait until you find out what the kappa actually is

>>17494691
Yeah we need more threads about fascism instead

Im reading Crocodile now. I started with Arcade then Kappa and then Cherokee. I definitely liked Cherokee the most. Sam was my favorite part of Arcade and I was glad to see he’s one of the main characters. Nihilistic with a wicked sense of humor.

>>17487002
I actually like to read what anons write and to be frank, Gardner isn’t THAT bad. Most certainly not my cup of tea, but the prose is shit, but the story isn’t any worse than some of the Stephan king stuff. I’m reading pic related now because it’s also being shilled here by some Canadian, and I like a whole ton better. It’s simple but not poorly chopped together like the call series’ sentences and structure. Definitely recommend it if you like supporting anons.

>>17494763
Sam is in Cherokee?

>>17493165
based?

>>17494153
pure kino

>>17494779
Yeah.

>some dude shills his book and names it after an Indian
>actual Indian shills his book and gets told to fuck off
racism is real bros! Now cool!

>>17494858
Kek. Based Fag Gardner.

>>17494768
>>17494797
both are john samefagging

>>17494298
This part was hilarious. Gardner clearly became self aware enough to realize how retarded this was when writing it. Then it’s kind of brushed aside as “Nah it’s great!”

>>17494908
In Call of the Cradle this is taken to an even greater extreme. Cradle has the funniest conclusion to a story I’ve read. Which is jarring because it’s dead serious.

>>17494663
lol

>>17494712
I'm a couple chapters into Kappa. The atmosphere and mood in this is reminding me of Shenmue. I'm not really sure where it's going but it's good so far.

>>17495229
>Shenmue
I see.

It kinda gave me Shenmue vibes up until after the fight with the kappa

>>17494908
I really hope that the entire series is Gardner trolling his readers

>>17495329
I don’t want to spoil it. But at the very end of Call of the Cradle that basically happens.

>>17495345
Based. I'll save that one for last. I have three of his books left, including that one

where's the /lit/ discord. i want to meet mr. gardner.

>>17495404
I want to meat him

>>17494026
>>17494153
But is Johnny a cute twink, yes or no?

>>17495431
No he's a bear

>>17495436
>a weepy bear
Yuck, guess I'm steering clear of this one

>>17490970
Why aren’t you reading Stephanie Meyer right now?

>>17495438
Hes a hot bear for you tho ???

>>17490761
It's peppermint

>>17493193
>t. not faggot gardner

It's not me posting this time. I only posted my book once here. I blame the discord, they've taken a liking to me because I'm a pretty sweet guy if I do say so myself.

Good god, is F Gardner /lit/'s twink of the week? I suppose they needed someone after RC Waldun

>>17495461
And modest

And sexy

>>17495443
I'm reading your post log

Guys what if Card and Gardner are the same person and this feud is made up to manufacture drama so that both books sell because negative publicity is good publicity. You ever think of that? huh?

>>17494906
I’m not John I just genuinely want to help him shill because he’s a good writer and I actually care about reading unlike half of the people on this board

>>17495505
Personally I'd like to think that it's a meta-narrative wherein, at some point in the future, Gardner is wearing a nametag or something like that and is then caught in an explosion or something that singes most of his name off and he loses his memory due to traumatic amnesia so when he wakes up he only sees part of his name and then travels back in tiem to stop the event happening.
"Gardner" => "Card",
like Voyager 6 =>Vger in Star Trek
or Fry => Lars in Futurama
or No Vacancy => Novac in Fallout: New Vegas

Could be meta-kino once we get the payoff desu.

>>17495628
Thanks for the idea, might use that in a book

-G.

>Joe downs a beer in like two sips
>A year passes by and the kid dies with no context
>Joe tells his therapist that he's taking his pills incorrectly and the therapist doesn't care
>Joe turns on the radio at random just to catch the beginning of a story about him
I'm not even a fifth of the way through the book and it's already completely nonsensical to the point of being amusing.

>>17495638
I'll sell you the rights via a Gentlemans' Agreement for any amount of money you think is fair.
Please send your offer to:
PayPal.Me/johndavidcard

And then consider the concept all yours.

>>17495645
Since you have the book, does the writing style at any point seem similar to pic relates? I'm doing a little skullduggery and I want to get to the bottom of this until I find out who keeps shilling.

>>17495667
Uhhh you're supposed to be dead?

>>17495505
>>17495628
I know Gardner irl and can confirm this is the case, it’s actually incredibly gross the lengths she’s going through in order to pull this off though. Yes, she. She used a voice changer in the discord. She realized how much hate she was getting under the Gardner alias and decided to try Payless shilling to see if it would get her better recognition. All of this is one big experiment, that’s why the Gardner books read like shit. She stole People Mover from an unknown author on instagram and didn’t bother to remove any of the native shit, and now native Twitter is trying to doxx her because they’re pissed. Literally send help, this bitch is going to get cancelled.

>>17495771
Link to voice changer software? Been looking for a good one

>>17495792
she uses voicemod pro if I remember correctly

>>17495803
>>17495771
post pussy

>>17495771
This is somehow more retarded than either "some guy writing dumb books for a laugh" or "a literal autistic retard shilling their books on 4chan"

>>17495839
it’s butterfly

>>17495843
She's smarter than I gave her credit for. Barely.

>gardner is butterfly
Literally plot twist of the century

Gardner is Mexican... kek
Card is... Red Indian? Oh, like a casino, card, gettit?

Wait a minute. I think both these names are trolls.

>>17495876
Natives have membership cards for whatever perks being in a tribe or whatever. Like a library card but for drug discounts or buying cheap cigarettes or whatever. At least in my province.

>>17495933
You’re describing Metís not natives

>>17495933
If we get an African-American author pop up and start shilling on here named "Cotton" I think we'll know it's part of the new /lit/ shared universe then.

>>17495949
Don’t give butterfly any more ideas

>>17495947
The micmac (or Miqmaq or whatever they call themselves) tribe here in Newfoundland has the card like I described. However, most of them are as white as me, so they're technically metris and I should get a DNA test or something so I can get gibs too

>>17495949
What would we call the 4chan multiverse

>>17495947
What's the diff

>>17495827
Like her

>>17494242
>>17494265
>>17494272
I'm the one who wrote the review. I was on a People Mover thread when I finished reading it and anons were encouraging me to be the first to review it, so I did, first posted to Goodreads and then to Amazon once the review was approved. I am incidentally also an author. I was on a thread much earlier talking with Gardner (presumably) and said I'd check out his books. Wasn't a fan. Honestly. Sorry, Gardner.

But last night I see that now I'm part of the conspiracy, that John Mark Card is supposedly dead and lived in Georgia and anons noticed that my review showed me as also being in Georgia. This honestly freaks me out. It is not the first conscience I have encountered lately.

>>17494242
>>17494265
>>17494272
I'm the one who wrote the review. I was on a People Mover thread when I finished reading it and anons were encouraging me to be the first to review it, so I did, first posted to Goodreads and then to Amazon once the review was approved. I am incidentally also an author. I was on a thread much earlier talking with Gardner (presumably) and said I'd check out his books. Wasn't a fan. Honestly. Sorry, Gardner.

But last night I see that now I'm part of the conspiracy, that John Mark Card is supposedly dead and lived in Georgia and anons noticed that my review showed me as also being in Georgia. This honestly freaks me out. It is not the first coincidence I have encountered lately.

>>17495404
It’s called “Neo /lit”

>>17494298
>His teacher’s name is literally “Mrs. Exposition.”

>>17495295
I finished Kappa. I thought it awesome. That was one hell of a twist at the end. You're right about the tone changing a lot after the fight.

Can someone please upload these to b-ok.cc? Help an anon who missed out on the free giveaways.

>>17498353
They’re free on unlimited. That’s where I read them.

>>17494026
>Mark and Johnny
how's your sex life?

>>17494469
I hate funfags. The real answer to this is “Who cares of it’s entertaining?” A book with unnecessary commas is a bad book. It’s poorly written. It doesn’t matter if it’s “fun” to read. Gardner is a hack.

>>17497224
I’m reading it right now and genuinely like it as well. Gonna leave a review when I’m finished. Don’t spoil anything for me but I’m on page 60 at the cliffhanger. Does it get even better from there?

>>17495876
Gardner’s not Mexican. He’s a white dude from Chicago.

>>17498938
Somebody in the discoed ask him what ethnicity he is. I need to know.

>>17498953
*discord

Also post the link to the discord here. At least one of you have to be in it.

>>17498907
Well actually that's wrong the height of the main character's peril. There's no more run-ins with anybody like those characters anymore, but one more interesting thing out of left field happens for her and then it ends quite nicely.

>>17499034
About the height I mean.

>>17495431
Yes. The cutest.

How can Gardener afford these ads? It’s been months now. It doesn’t make sense.

>>17494026
I'm starting to lose the plot just reading this.

>>17499186
i looked at 4chan's pricing and i don't understand it. there's a flat rate and then a bid for price per x number of views? it allows you to set your own price points. it's psosible he bid the minimum amount and because no one else advertises on 4chan he "took the lot of them."

>>17494507
link

>>17499034
>>17499047
I’m glad I was really worried for her safety the entire book. It’s hard to read books about little girls since coming on this board, lots of perverts here.

>>17499034
>and then it ends quite nicely.

Hmmm, I was intrigued by the possibility that the book would end with the little girl going to the same place that "To the white sea" goes.

>>17499458
>>17499499
>Hmmm, I was intrigued by the possibility that the book would end with the little girl going to the same place that "To the white sea" goes
Well, in a way, she does. I say it ends "nicely," but I mean in terms of story. Read on.

>>17499526
Stop posting about an off topic book here.

>>17499531
It's all on-topic and connected as far as self-published authors on /lit go. Don't really feel like making a People Mover thread when this one is still up and talking about it.

>>17499588
Samfagging doesn't count as people talking about it, John.

this thread could be 4 people for all I know

Someone PLEASE post the discord F Gardner is in. I want to meet him!

>>17499320
It cost $20 upfront and at least 20 cents per click. His books are $1 each. Don't you think he's exhausted the entire userbase of /lit/ already

>>17499728
I don’t know. But he advertises on /x, too.

>>17499667
I'm not John, I'm P.A. Choi

>>17499724
It's in the Goodreads group. Neo /lit.

>>17499667
The fact you people still think it’s John same posting and not that people genuinely like his story is funny af. Going to write him a great review just to spite this board.

>>17498662
It would be better if you were here

Anybody got a digital version of the book they're willing to upload to zippyshare and share with me?

>>17500867
I would if I knew how to do that. I think most people are reading it off unlimited since it's free there.

>>17495616
What if John isn't even a /lit/poster and it's just the one guy who reviewed his book shilling it on his behalf?

>>17500909
Do that many people on this board have Kindle Unlimited? What happened to Amazon bad and Bezos is evil

>>17501167
I have it because I hate myself, and my money

>>17500953
That does sound about right since I'm the ghost of John David Card but i'm only watching the thread not participating in it

>>17501203
Spooky

>>17501167
They're the biggest company in the world. It's hard to just completely avoid them. I don't care what Bezos politics are. I just like unlimited because the amount of free content on there is insane.

>>17501167
>>17501201
>>17501233
I tried the free trial and it was pretty fucking sweet, great way to read just whatever and I don't have to feel like I need to get my money's worth if I end up not liking a book. $10 a month is too much, though.

>>17500953
That’s pretty much what I’m doing. I feel a very strong sense about his writing like it could one day be a classic if he fixed up the spelling errors. I felt a very deep connection to the main character and feel if would be important for more young adults and minors to read her story, it’s very relatable.

>>17501317
Yeah, America does have a lot of meth-head parents.

>>17501317
Gardner's books are at least exciting and fun to read. The book you're referring to is just flat out boring and uninteresting.

>>17495645
I audibly Kek'd at this. Sounds heckin fucking amazing.

>>17501338
My parents were just abusive. Both my siblings and I tried to run away at least a few times in our childhoods. It’s fairly common to have abusive or toxic parents in general I think, broken home lives.
>>17501364
They aren’t though. I read a bit of Gardner, his writing style is cringe. People Mover has genuinely poetic prose.

>>17501434
>People Mover has genuinely poetic prose.
Separating the boys from the men here. True /litizens stand up.

>>17501434
>>17501466
Trying to hard, John. We all know it’s you. Why are you so hellbent on turning Gardner into your enemy? You’re clearly trying to repeat his success/meme book status. Look if you want to sell your book, trying to defame another writer just makes you seem like a dick.

>>17501500
It's even working against him, I have mote interest in reading Gardner than him just because of his shitposting.

>>17501500
>>17501532
I’m not John I’m white

>>17501574
What is John?

>>17501532
Same.

>>17501532
If I were an aspiring author and wanted to make SURE no one would ever read my books, I would basically go out of my way to attack other writers like he's doing. No one likes a bully. Which is exactly all this guy is. Except it's backfiring and he's killing his chances of his book ever seeing success. I don't know why he had a grudge against gardener, but I don't care. All I know is that I would much rather read gardeners books than whoever this no name asshole is.

>>17501580
He’s Cherokee, he’s even a character in that Gardner book.

>>17501624
You’re making it out like anons on this board don’t already piss on Gardner. This guy just does it with a name attached. Dare I say, based.

>>17501629
You're going from insulting Gardner to lying about you being in his book? You're not fooling anyone.

>>17501646
Dare I say, "samefag." Everyone knows it's you, John.

Namefags on 4chan always devolves into this schizo shit every time where no one knows who is really posting anything, it's pretty funny.

>>17494509
Meds. Now.

>>17495645
Amazing. You’ve just sold me on this.

WHo call croc? Please tell me I ask every thread and never get an answer.

>>17502621
Kappa

>>17501665
Everyone knows it's you, Gardner.

>>17490970
Why would anyone want to read OP’s book? The anon your responding to didn’t say he didn’t want to read ANY book. Just spoil it already.

Gardner and Card are the same person, wake up sheeple

>>17502827
The entire plot of the book has already been greentexted

>>17494026
>>17494039
>>17494153

>>17502935
That's Call of the Arcade. Not Call of the Crocodile. Different book.

>>17502935
>Oh shit. Somone greentexted the plot of a book. It's been ruined forever. Nobody better greentext any books from classic literature or they'll be ruined, too!

Retarded

>>17494026
>>17494153
This sounds incredible. You lied to me /lit. This doesn't sound bad at all.

>>17503289
Well it's written badly, so if you like mediocre shit, you'll have a blast.

>>17503309
Are you the same guy as >>17498858
Because this sounds like a terrible argument. If (Insert book you love here) has too many commas it wouldn't automatically become a terrible book. Horrible logic.

>>17503331
No, I'm not.
It's terribly written. It does not flow. I recoil when I read it. Simple as that.
Closest comparison I can think of is when a friend who read the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo said the book had a good story but was poorly written. The David Fincher adaptation is amazing, but I don't think I'll need to read the book.

>>17503331
with that kind of logic, the vast majority of writings on FanFiction.net are magnum opuses, if you ignore the poor grammar, formatting, sentence structure, and plot pacing

>>17503343
That's the reverse of what usually happens. Most people say X movie is bad but the book was good. So if David Fincher directed Call of the Crocodile it would be a masterpiece?

>>17503343
gardner's prose is serviceable. really seems like you're jealous and overly defensive concerning the attention he's been getting for his numerous publications and swashbuckling viral-marketing campaign.

>>17503356
I'm not saying all books with poor grammar are good. I read the greentext of what that anon posted and it sounded interesting. I can't imagine it suddenly becoming terrible because it has too many commas.

>>17503363
>So if David Fincher directed Call of the Crocodile it would be a masterpiece?
Fucking yes, of course.

Point is, the reason David Fincher's Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is excellent has little to do with the story or with the author's writing.

>>17503373
This is the most reasonable answer at this point. It also explains the countless oddly identical negative posts. Which are ironically claiming gardener is samefagging and spamming his books. It kind of seems obvious now in retrospect.

>>17503377
>All that matters is the director.

I'm not even sure how to respond to such a strange claim. This would essentially imply that all writers are pointless. I don't think I need to elaborate why this is ludicrous.

>>17503373
>gardner's prose is serviceable.
Strongly disagree.
Some of us have better standards, anon.

>>17503373
>swashbuckling viral-marketing campaign.
uhh

>>17503402
>all writers are pointless
No, but a director with flourish can make a lot of difference.

Movies and literature are two different mediums.

Someone post the fucking /lit discord Gardener is in.

>>17503413
Why are so many movies poor adaptations? Why do people usually say the books were better? David Fincher is good. But there have been other good directors who have made poor adaptations.

>>17503374
>I can't imagine it suddenly becoming terrible because it has too many commas
Greentext makes anything sound interesting. But if you don't believe us, you'll have to suffer Gardner's prose for yourself. We tried to warn you

What am I in for?

>>17503515
should've gotten a kobo

>>17503515
A very boring book.

>>17503526
Is People Mover available on Kobo?

>>17503502
I can stand something "bad" as long as it's a good time. I've already heard someone say crocodile is like The Room. If it's "bad" in the same sense that the Room is a poorly bad movie. Point I'm trying to make is The Room is one hell of a movie to watch. If Crocodile is the same way? I don't see a problem.

>>17503551
I never saw the Room. although in general, I don't like so bad it's good movies. I know some people find overly bad stuff amusing, and around normies, I pretend I do too, but those things make me feel tried

>>17503575
That might explain it. "Selling a cat to a dog person." It simply might not be your cup of tea. As most art is subjective.

I'm John David Card, AMA.

>>17503809
No one cares. You're making yourself more unlikable by the minute. You defame gardener and say his books are shit despite clearly being influenced by him. You even copied the fake obituary &amp made for their magazine about gardener. Except you made one about yourself. Now you're attempting to hijack threads about gardeners books, because your own threads can't survive on their own. You're trying to ride gardeners coattails in the most pathetic ways imaginable.

>>17503664
Haven’t seen that one before.

>>17503610
Makes sense. It’s like how some people say The Room is bad while others love it. Both are true. Depends on your taste.

>>17503437
No

The sequel to PEOPLE MOVER drops soon. And word in the /lit discord is that it's gonna be four times the length of the first book and will really blow Gardner's novels out of the water.

>>17505566
checked prophet

better get my copy of People Mover asap so I'm ready and all caught up when this new one comes out then
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08TGBGGF8

>>17505566
How can someone write a sequel when they're dead?

>>17506481
how can Tupac release tracks when he's dead?

>>17506543
Fair point.

>>17503901
I’ve haven’t seen someone btfo so hard on this site in a while. Normally I’d say that’s really mean guy he was asking for it.

>>17506890
I'm on team Card.

>>17506890
That was r/murderedbywords tier. Go back.

>>17507017
Of course you are. You're Card.

>>17507694
No, I'm P.A. Choi

>>17505566
I’m in the /lit discord and no one has ever even mentioned your book. They do talk about gardeners books and they seem leagues better than yours.

>>17503343
>>17503377
Good points. Reminds me of how everyone likes the movie of The Shining because Kubrick made it so well. Gardner’s like our autistic version of Stephen King. He can pimp our new books quickly but they would be better if some director like Fincher had the material in their hands. Some of his scenes are fine. They would probably translate well one screen. But Gardner just has too many tense issues and other grammatical concerns.