/lit/ - Literature

Many of us are veritable chads, banging dozens of literary girls nightly. What you need to understand is that 9 times out of 10, female professors who are really into deconstructing literature and School of Resentment style theory are BEGGING to get fucked by Big Canonical Cock. I am being serious. I am not being ironic. For my survey course of English lit from Beowulf to 1800, my professor fit this trope exactly; she was about 28, fairly cute (not an art hoe, but with shorter brown hair), and very into “fighting back” against traditional views of medieval literature. Queering Langland, "there were black people in the Middle Ages," all of that. On the first day, we discussed the concept of a literary canon, which she argued inherently favored those works produced by people in power. Needless to say, I disagreed. Because I happened to have a class in the next room right before her course, I was always the first to arrive, usually about 5 minutes before anyone else. We would have brief conversations, first about whatever material we were going to cover that day and then about random topics- other books and poems, little details of our lives, etc.

Slowly I began to realize she was dropping small hints of her sexual availability. Nothing too risqué. She would say things like "Old English poetry (she never said Anglo-Saxon because that was a 'white supremacist dogwhistle') is so elegiac, it always makes me lonely" or "anon, you might like this article on the York mystery plays, I found it very stimulating," etc. What's more, these hints always came after I said something to defend the canon or canonical authors and traditional interpretations. For example, one day I happened to namedrop Harold Bloom during a conversation about Shakespeare's use of the carnivalesque. She made a face, and I said "Love him or hate him, you have to admit Bloom presents a useful analysis of poetic influence across the history of English literature (or words to that effect)." She bit her lip, and for a second I wasn't sure if she was going to criticize our guy or what, but instead she mentioned that the Taming of the Shrew was playing at a local theater, subtly indicating she wished to go with me. We did end up going, and it was particularly fun to watch her watch Petruchio tame Katherine. She clearly loved it; I didn't bring it up, of course, but only a few days before she had said the play was irredeemably misogynistic. Needless to say, we had an enjoyable night.

i look like a fucking nerd with the body of an emaciated twink, a mistake of nature

I dress like a hobo and i don't socialize. I'm also in debt. If the academic career doesn't work i'll just kill myself. Most of the other students seem normal, they'll likely work at starbucks

>>16930681
Me too, 5'11 and 120 pounds.

>>16930551
I have a lot of sex (no, I'm not joking)

Mentally ill

>>16930551
Like all university classroom, a cattle caste.

>>16930551
Why don't literary and philosophy majors actually seem to read? The ones I met never talk about never seem to discuss what they read, act any wiser, or work any harder than STEM people I know who go to book clubs.
At most I see them rushing a reading for a class. I thought great works are supposed to be transformative.

>>16930703
>5'11
Mind sparing me a few inches? Heh

>>16930718
They picked the major because they were directionless, rather than because they had a passion for it.

>>16930703
at least you aren't 5'8"

phil and your philology students are compeletely different.
Like not at all comparable desu.

>>16930742
Who’s talking about philology

>>16930742
redpill me on philology

>>16930766
even english lit course is philology desu.

>>16930673
This was a nice story the first time you posted it. Now, it's tiring.

>>16930551
>faggots
>trannies
>mentally ill
only options

>>16930791
>>16930799
Philology is just linguistics, has very little to do with literature. Don’t know why there’s a confusion here.

>>16930799
I don't think you know what philology is.

What kinda girls go to your courses? Because this is my first semester and I literally never seen any of my study mates, just their names. Lots of asians in my courses though, hope there's an arthoe there haha.

>>16930551
Twinks begging to be turned inside out by muscle chad business majors on the football team. Then later in bed the /lit/bro will enlighten Chad or Tyrone on the finer points of the meme trilogy.

>>16930673
>>16930551
sameposter posting for the sake of copypasta

>>16930712
I have met 3 people who I would consider sentient at my uni.

>>16930810
>Philology is just linguistics
>Philology is the study of language in oral and written historical sources; it is the intersection of textual criticism, literary criticism, history, and linguistics.[1][2][3] Philology is more commonly defined as the study of literary texts as well as oral and written records, the establishment of their authenticity and their original form, and the determination of their meaning.

>>16931163
My bad, I didn’t realise it was such a broad field. I still wouldn’t regard it as relevant to modern literature degrees, but I can see where the anon was coming from.

to be honest I'm not into philosophy
I prefer poopology more, studying the art of logs slidding down the throt is very beautiful

The folks in my English program all either mentally, physically, or spiritually ill. All of them. And the funniest part is that STEM fags regularly take our courses and outperform them. Most will become forgettable high school teachers.

>>16931782
I was one of the STEM students that outperformed the English majors in their own classes, thank you for noticing

>>16931788
It's even funnier when you guys take Phil courses and stymie all the Marxists with basic, common sense arguments.

>>16931838
I sure hope so. My creative writing class was funny at first, but after 3 assignments where over half the class shoehorned in one of the following
> brain dead politics
> rape
> suicide
> dead baby
I just started putting out technically sound garbage

>>16931619
that's called scatology you nonce

>>16930551
Soon to be hungry and/or depressed.

>>16931862
Right? I feel bad for the profs, honestly. They must get so tired of reading the same bullshit stories and poems over and over again.

>>16931619
Styx cult is so obsessed with poop. Why?

>>16931902
I ended up giving my prof a 15-page multi-part story about finding the perfect taco bell order. Got an A because I was "adventurous with form"

>>16930703
bait

>>16931919
I'm genuinely relieved to hear I'm not the only one who rolls in giving zero fucks like that. I don't say this often on here, but you have my respect.

>>16931967
Oh we exist, keep fighting the good fight, and publish something worth reading in your spare time. Writing from a place of zero fucks has special powers on quality

>>16931996
I hear you, brother. I reached that same conclusion right before I taking a break from my classes. My second book just dropped yesterday.

>>16930673
Nice copypasta

>>16930551
They are either rich or retards.
>>16930673
Serious deja vu.

minimum wage cunts
often 'communists' too

>>16930739
At least you aren't 5' 6"

>>16930551
I'm 330 pounds, 1m85. I was the only fat guy there. It's mostly very thin hipster men. Since I'm fat and hairy, I was very popular with the men but was not popular with the women. The thin men were popular with women but were mostly gays.

>>16934705
At least you aren't 4' 3"

>>16933148
At least you aren't 5'1

>>16930551
i knew a guy who studied literature and he never read books

>>16930551
lit's my minor, most of my class are y/a reader females
there's one guy who reads pewdiepie/betterthanfood-core novels and phil, probably the closest thing to someone who actually cares about literature

>>16930551
Actual chads. No, I'm not joking. As the vernacular goes: if you know, you know.

>>16934715
He cute.

>>16930681
I’m 6’2” and 220 lbs., or at least I was until I gained 30 lbs. from being home during coronavirus.

Why do we have a tendency to categorize people and make judgements like this? Did people do this historically or is those because we have so many people?

I'm doing philosophy and mathematics. I would not be surprised if there were nearly a 1 SD difference in IQ between philosophy students and mathematics students. It is left as an exercise for the reader to render a plausible guess as to who comes out on top in that comparison.

>>16930551
I once met a guy that was studying literature and was really deep into medieval lit and scholastic philosophy. I don't think he was representative of the mean student though,

I'm a fit, handsome guy with severe mental health issues

>>16936348
Fellow based STEM and philosophy major, i'm doing engineering with philosophy- I find that the STEM students never think about their beliefs, and the philosophy students are just as bad (accepting whatever belief is told to them to be correct).

>>16936809
How can you be sure that's what they do?

>>16936370
lol

>>16930551
I got fucked a cute English major twink the other day. Best experience ever.

>>16934715
>>16936243
Issa woman

>>16930673
sameposter but fun

>>16937203
Naw, that's Elliot.

>>16930551
>philosophy

>>16934715
is it gay that i would fuck this 5'1 bloke?

>>16930551
I'm philosophy + math and I'm kind of a loser.

>>16936260
I'm also denial about my covid weight gain.

>>16930718
I know some who probably liked literature at first, but I feel like those courses pile book upon book, and you don't have time to read them. I don't actually know, I was a stem major and I took up /lit/erature when I had free time after graduating.

What I want to know is what do you actually learn in those courses that you can't get by reading the book yourself and discussing it with people online?

A literature major I know joked and laughed that I go to a lower ranked university than them. The real joke is that I am doing a STEM degree and they are doing literature.

>>16930551
pseuds

>>16938817
>you can't get by reading the book yourself and discussing it with people online?
Nothing in particular, you have internet, you have book on the texts. Usually is well-rounded view and context of the texts, curated analysis that professors can provide, but most likely you can find them online if you know where to look for.
I don't think people discuss books anymore, to my knowledge forums, etc are dead, and here for example rarly you can talk of Literature to anybody that actually has anything good to say.
But maybe it's just me. Threads are comfy here when they prosper, specially Philosophy ones. Literature ones? Not really.

>>16930551
lot of em are average looking, nicely dressed young women. The few guys i've come across are more of the nerdy or very artsy type...and all skinny

>>16936989
I can't, these are my personal anecdotes. The engineers i've encountered tend to take many things (like equations, or statements of the world) and run with it, willing to not think about the real-ness of that thing. That's more in the realm of philo of science or epistemology, which makes sense given our field. Worshippers of science, unquestioning of the world around them. In my philosophy class I hate to say it but it's quite obvious nobody actually reads the texts we're assigned, as all class discussions are topical and follow whatever sparknotes or goodreads said about the authors. Little critical thought surrounding the topics discussed imo, very much so an echoing of the sentiments of others.

>>16930703
Who's that?