/lit/ - Literature

I'm 30. I didn't ask to be, but it could be worse. Someone once said that after a certain age, a man without a family can be a bad thing. What age did he mean? I was terrified of my third decade until I had my first child. Now I look back on my twenties with an existential dread only matched by the comfort I feel by my current age. Alcoholism, progressivism, higher education, cheap sex, shitty jobs.

These days some freak with a bone in its nose calls me a crypto fascist because I go to an evangelical Reformed church and only fuck my wife, but I'll take that any day over all the "knowledge" I acquired from reading Deleuze and Pynchon and Althusser and Derrida.

>>16897104
What do I do if I’m actually Holden Caulfield

>>16897104
>be freshman in college, first week of first semester
>only book i've ever read outside of high school was Infinite Jest, I never read any real literature. I was not aware it was regarded as such a meme book in the literary world. I genuinely thought it was the #1 greatest book ever written, and I only read like 3 books, 4 if you count that i read IJ twice.
>i would talk about it at parties with girls.
>i would bring it up in my english lit class, question why it isn't on the syllabus, i'd call out, interrupt the class. i'd go to office hours and try to bring it up to my instructor in front of the other graduate research assistants and they all just looked at me like i was insane
>no matter what the topic was in any essay, i'd connect it to IJ somehow, mainly because I viewed literature as 99% Infinite Jest and 1% people making poor attempts to create something as good (meanwhile having zero points of comparison to IJ)
>my breaking point was when i attended a seminar from some famous lit professor. he said something along the lines of Infinite Jest being good, and everyone laughed, and he smiled, as if he was sarcastic and I was really confused.
>i straight up interrupted him and asked "um why was that funny?"
>i saw a few of the grad research assistants from office hours stifling their laughter, i felt something was up
>speaker says "well it's a good book but the people who rave about it only do so because they've never read much else, like upper class white kids."
>fuming i say "that's not true at all"
>speaker says "if you rave about it, have you even read Pretentious Angst by Ernest Milton?"
>i blindly respond "of course i have, it's a classic"
>the entire room bursts into booming laughter
>i look around completely dumbfounded
>after 30 seconds of loud laughter which felt like an eternity, i'm beat red, speaker says "if you're still confused, that's neither a real book nor author, case in point."
>i storm out, switch majors the next day
>4 years later, senior year, at a bar talking to a qt3.14, she says she's an english major, i'm a marketing major, i bust her balls for not having any job security (100% taking out years of my STEM roommate busting MY balls about job security)
>her friend arrives, also an english major
>"oh i remember you, you're the Infinite Jest guy!"
>she tells her friend the story about the seminar and what i'd do in freshman lit class
>qt3.14 says "and now you're a marketing major, lecturing me about job security and commercialism. you've literally become the very thing Wallace criticizes in Infinite Jest", and they both laugh
>i storm out
>creates 2 year existential crisis i've yet to recover from

>>16897104
I remember the first time I saw OPs thread. "This is a glownigger data mining thread," I thought. "You won't collect and demographic data about me, glownigger."

And I was right. The CIA operative left empty handed, totally unable to influence me with ad data or bot posts.

I have neither read catcher in the rye or Saligner, but fuck it, let's try. I come from a big family in a poor city, populated by brown people in a white country. I'm pale myself, but my black eyes and dark hair saves me a lot of trouble. Some of these muslims even call me shabab, and their turban-girls love me. I fucked with a green-eyed girl from Iraq once. Thank God her Quaran-daddy wasn't home to hear her get her pussy beaten by a christian. I would be damned and she would probably end up being kicked out. Nice ass though, and I even got to touch her hair. - on the pussy that is.

>>16897159
You're a phony

>>16897150
This seems apt.

I am the only child of a man who died laughing choking on his dinner. I have assigned importance to things based on coincidence.

>>16897243
Based schizoid personality disorder poster

>>16897243
Don't mention us or else eyeballs human meat split eyeballs jelly in the socket fingers sliced off at the knuckle salami slivers of tongue still wriggling nigger killer fetus abortion

>>16897104
Life is a nigger and so am I.

When you fuck up in life, your punishment is niggers. Don't make six figures? Live with the niggers. Commit a crime? Go to jail with the niggers. Fuck up in class? Go sit with the niggers in remedial class.

After 28 years of this, I finally realized that they couldn't punish me anymore because I had become a nigger too. Imagine my shock when I sat down at a nice restaurant only to see people next to me make a disgusted face and ask for their check early. It doesn't feel good to realize you're a nigger... a punishment for fucking your life up, but at least you know where you stand. And now I knew. I stood with the niggers because no one else would have me after lifetime of fuck ups.

>>16897265
You should read Houellebecq

>>16897243
I have your ip

>>16897104
I chugged my bottle of Heiney and felt the oily slick churning in my bloated belly. It was only a matter of time, I thought, before I'd have to ejaculate a thick, greasy and foulfully-stenching mass from my swollen asshole. Fuck the twentieth century, I thought. The culmination of two and a half millennia of art and science is about to be ejected from my herniated sphincter, and washed away to be processed by some poor shit in a plant somewhere on the outskirts of LA. I took a drag from my cigarette. I thought I'd better warn my wife to get out of the house before it started.

super Mario

>>16898140
Why did you post this. What does it mean. Why.

funny mario
>>16898164
I love Super mario. He Has a Red Hat.

>>16897104
I heve never even been to a Rye field lmaoooo. How could I possibly sound like some catcher in the rye. Actually, I have never played baseball either, in my country only japs play it. Catching sounds pretty gay, but I guess playing as a batter could be cool.

>>16897104
HOLDEN RAPED PHOEBE

I'm a phony

I'm not sure what to do. By all accounts, I'm a well-adjusted person; I don't look at my feet as I walk, or mumble as I talk, but I can not help but feel anxious. Day in and day out, I feel a looming sense of dread, like something terrible, something which never comes, will happen soon. However, days pass like normal, albeit a little faster than normal, with being cooped up inside. I don't know what the future will bring, or if that black mass in the pit of my gut is warranted, I guess I'll see.

>>16898223
I remember suggesting Holden's pedophilic tendencies in English class and the teacher absolutely rejecting everything I said
Fuck school

>>16898264
Women can't even understand basics like Salinger, Anon.

>>16898280
It's wild that you could infer she was a female teacher

>>16898280
Found the incel!

>>16898314
found the crypto-chud

>>16897104
I talked to one of my oldest friends just now. We go back almost 17 years now, and I'm only 22. I love this man. He is so close to my heart, his well-being so essential and important, that I can say with full confidence: yes, I would commit acts of genocide and pure depravity if it was in his interest. We spoke about the book he intends to write, about literature in general, and more importantly about life and spirituality and metaphysics. Despite the fact that he is an atheist, he listens to and cherishes my opinions, an ex-atheist. He is deeply considerate, seems to genuinely ponder everything I tell him, and respects and values me. I could strangle most everyone in this thread if it be necessary, if it would ensure his success. I like you /lit/, I really do. This place has given me so much. It would be a hard choice, one wrought with regret and despair, but I absolutely would choose him over the sum total of all of you. Also, I'm a libra.

>>16898332
Based and bropilled.

>>16898332
ur gay lol

>>16898377
I find the thought of kissing another man revolting. I have no clue why women put up with the aesthetic cancer that is the male, and I do not understand why all women are not lesbians.

THE YEAR IS TWOTHOUSAND; I AM TEN YEARS OF AGE, RISING FROM A BRIEF PERIOD OF DEPRESSION CAUSED BY MY CONTEMPLATION OF MORTALITY, AND MY PURPOSE IN THE WORLD; FEW MONTHS INTO THE FUTURE I WILL MEET THE INDIVIDUALS WHO WOULD BECOME THE BEST FRIENDS THAT I WILL EVER HAVE, AND WHOM I WILL NEVER SEE AGAIN AFTER AGE THIRTEEN.

I DO NOT KNOW IT YET, BUT I AM LIVING THE BEST TIME OF MY GENERATION, AND ARGUABLY, OF MY LIFE; WE ARE RECEIVING THE NEW MILLENNIVM WITH UNIVERSAL CELEBRATION, AND WITH A VAGUE, BUT OMNIPRESENT, ENTHUSIASM FOR THE FUTURE; THE MILLENNIAL SPIRIT GLOWS IN OUR BODIES, AND THE FLAME OF «Y 2 K» CANDESCES IN OUR HEARTS.

THIS IS THE YEAR IN WHICH, FOR THE FIRST TIME, I BUY A MUSICAL COMPACT DISC WITH MY OWN MONEY.

THE YEAR TWOTHOUSAND IS CYAN IN COLOUR.

>>16898573
Rate my realist proses: >>16898113

>>16897104
something something his sister Phoebe

>>16898328
found the tranny

>>16899178
What's a crypto-chud?

>>16899258
idk don't care enough to go on warosu and see the deleted post but anyone who uses chud is a tranny

At 23 I live in a state of meandering uncertainty where the brief moments of happiness keep me comfortable. Although I have no real struggle, I am suspended in a purgatory of melancholy. The only solace is my love and the cope of having brothers in suffering. The only way forward has not appeared to me quite yet. I hope to make something of myself.

I wanted to get drunk but now I realize it's 10:40pm... you can't get booze this late on a saturday, or any day of the week for that matter. At least not in Ontario, Canada. What a shithole. Maybe my mom has some booze

>>16899640
This is holden for sure

>>16897265
based

>>16897492
>Based schizoid personality disorder poster
forget the '-id', that's full-blown schizo

>>16897170
I hope this is real

>>16898396
Based

>>16899606
Turn it around now I guess. I’ve had finally acquired momentum and I just turned 24. I’m afraid I’ve left it too late and I’m just endlessly spinning my wheels till I die.

>>16897104
The bit of self-worth I have is tied to test-scores from years ago. I have nothing real to show. I have made nothing. Produced nothing. Done nothing. Infinite steps to what end? None. An ending, yes, but no end. I am a Rube-Goldberg-Machine of dying.
There is a girl that I love, no, I am in love with. A painter. Talented too, far more successful than I am. She will lose interest. Pale sky today. Or I will lose interest. Did some pull ups. Sometimes I am proud of my arms and I often imagine them throwing people off, I often imagine myself throwing people off. A literary type, a smart man and such a body too. All in my head. No talent. Illusions of grandeur are not ambitions of greatness. The French makes it sound kind of sexy at least. Today, as all days lately, I will write for the sake of having written.

I find it extremely difficult to write about myself because I don't believe there's anybody there

>>16902136
Who is it that finds it difficult?

>>16897104
I suppose I am not much different from other people, I am after all still human. Yet I sometimes feel as though I am somehow very different from the rest of civilized society. I can't help but think of the Writers monologue from Stalker.
Some bastards would criticize me, I get wounded.
Another would laud me, I get wounded again.
Perhaps I've lived a shit life, perhaps I am not any different from anyone. It matters not, I am who I am.
I am a man who stands opposed to swedish society, for highly petty and idiotic reasons. I am an acid freak and chainsmoker, a man who might have appeared normal in the 60s, but I dont live in the 60s, I live in the year 2020 where the world seems to make less and less sense by the minute, and the worst excesses of the west seem more pronounced than ever.
I suppose I am slightly too harsh on myself, I am only a monster in my own eyes. I have a large circle of good friends, I am good at maths and I have the ability to find joy in the little things in life. And I think that last bit is the key to why I can function in this horrid time. I am happy.

>>16902148
There's no definition for me, I can only give you facts about myself, I can string together the facts into a narrative but I don't believe that makes it any more real. This kind of psychosis is contagious by the way, fair warning

>>16902239
edgy

>>16898184
Me too man I wanna be like him jumping around, stomping on brown midgets and getting coins from brick boxes

I am in love for the first time in my life at 27 with a decent Christian girl. Before meeting her I was an alcoholic, drug addict, whore mongering nihilist and suicidal. I was raised in a decent middle class family but wanted adventure. I got it. But never had love until now.

>>16897104
I am a normal person; a young adult. Mentally a child pretending and posturing as what I think 27 year old me should be. I like to keep things simple. My ideal life is a job with good work life balance, marrying my long time girlfriend, a small and cozy home, and a few pets. In my free time I write code and pursue creative hobbies such as writing and drawing; although I'm not good at either. I'm a misanthrope due to self-isolation in my youth and I hate it, but I crave the ability to be a positive influence on others. Through action I hope to change myself into a better normal person.

>>16897104
lmao theres like 50 replies and only 1 rec what the fuck

>>16897150
Reread Pynchon.
>>16897265
>>16897678
White Fragility
>>16898332
Mishima
>>16899606
Arno Schmidt
>>16899640
How to Buy Booze Online
>>16904475
THERE YOU GO

>>16904507
Which Mishima book?

>>16904530
The one with the mask. Don't know the English title. Confessions of A Mask maybe?

I'll be durn if I ain't. But who is. A feller can't ere know whether he is was or is except he were a fish.

>>16904507
Kill yourself dangelo shill

>>16904574
Id rather kill you, racist pig.

>>16904579
Reported your IP to the fbi. I'm an upstanding Biden voter and I donate to the DNC. I will personally make sure you're unemployable and I'm not even kidding. Hope your little comment was worth it :)

Gottem lmao

Spite can be a good emotion I find. It makes things more fun

>>16904614
He fucked with the wrong person. I'm a federal employee with a condo in McLean and I absolutely won't be called a racist by some anarchist or commie. I also went to Georgetown Law. I will make sure he is held accountable for threatening to kill me and calling me racist.

>>16904643
Why are you posting on a Mongolian Amateur Cheesemaking forum?

>>16898293
tintin is /lit/

>>16898573
Depression at 10? Damn...

>>16897150
Deleuze was a crypto fascist by that definition as well, dipshit.

>>16904655
because its fun. I mean I'm single but seeing someone. Its better than cable.

I AM A WORSHIPPER TO THE LORD OF THE EVERLASTING THRONE

>>16902394
nice.