/lit/ - Literature

>>15409680

>teachers and professors think I'm shit at literary criticism
>all I did was give my honest interpretations and write them the best I can
>carefully read every text I was writing about

>teachers and professors think I'm average at literary criticism
>all I did was write what was necessary
>skimmed what I was writing about
Books about being normal?

can you be a fraud on another board and not shit post here?

>mom helps me write my paper
>teacher pulls me over after class and compliments my paper

>don't write paper

>>15409760
Unfortunately not, sorry.

>write an analysis of 2 books in hs for summer assignment
>know I did well, imagined myself reading my essay to the class, picking my favorite essay out of the two
>first day of class
>teacher asks me to pick my favorite essay and read it in front of the class
felt pretty badass

>write son's paper
>teacher pulls him aside after class and compliments it
>professors think he's gifted at literary criticism
>he gets into a top grad school
>expects me to keep writing papers for him indefinitely
>won't even move out or do his own laundry
>start encoding heinous racial slurs into all his papers with a simple vigenere cipher
>wait until he's on the cusp of world recognition
>broadcast the code to the cipher
>pay gooks to make it go viral
>son is savagely beaten by wogs

>teachers and professors thought I was a dwarf in a suit
>all I did was eat a magical fruit and gain dancing powers
>didn't even learn how to dance or spend money going to a dance studio

>>15409680
>Get book list for junior year paper
>Lovely Bones is on it
>Saw the YMS review before so pick it
>Paper is supposed to be how the author put themselves in their work or some shit
>Look her up
>Lost her virginity at 19 to a rapist
>Apparently the first thing she did was quip about it to her dad
>Absolutely sick of this bitch
>Entire paper ripping on her for being a total fucking weirdo
>Book legit features ghost rape, child rape, adultery, supernatural murder, all kinds of weird bullshit that only a woman could come up with and think is anything but retarded
>Get an A
>Teacher stops when handing papers back
>"...I don't agree with your paper, and I'm very disappointed because I love this book, but you defended your points very well."
>Prose was unbearable
>Didn't make it past page 20
>Entire thing was based on shmoop summaries
>Haven't even fucked yet so I had no idea what I was talking about in regards to sex and rape

I also copy and pasted paragraphs of some Civil War general's Wikipedia entry for a paper in 2nd grade and never got caught

>>15409906
though for sure it'd end in wincest.

>write 20-pg paper on weaponized language in Hammett and Pynchon
>Prof says I should try and publish it
>never do
I regret this.

>read literary criticisms from the 19th ce
>use their diction and syntax
>prof calls me sophisticated and profound

>>15409680
For every pseud redditor “essayist” student there are a hundred barely literate troglodytes in every public school. Teachers latch onto the barest hint of sentience like vampires

>summer reading assignment
>I don't mind reading but all the books picked out by the teacher were gay as hell
>of the five books, I pick one that seems the least awful
>don't read it
>in class everyone is giving their presentations (just giving a summary of the book)
>think to myself: no problem, I'll just remember what the kid before me says about the book and repeat it
>all the kids before me picked different books
>realize if I'm the first kid to give a report on this book I'll have to make shit up, and I'll be instantly found out when someone else gives their report on the same book
>I'm the last kid to give the report
>literally no other kid picked the book I did
>completely make up a story based on the cover and title alone
>turns out the teacher didn't read it either and I passed the assignment

>have to give a creative response to a short play
>play is about some racist guy talking to a foreigner
>really can't be assed
>never do my assignments
>some other kids do a 'play'
>realize I can just improv a monologue
>go in front of the class
>say a bunch of racist shit in character
>"great monologue, anon!"

>>15411271
the opposite happened to me
>grow up reading gothic fiction in middle school
>accidentally begin copying their grammar (really, really long sentences with like twenty clauses) without thinking about it
>write all my essays like this
>teachers fucking hate everything I write
>one day in AP European English we all read a speech by the Queen of England and discuss how beautiful and complex it is for an entire paragraph being a single sentence
>I'm like "what the fuck, it's beautiful when the Queen writes like this but not me?"

>>15411314
I honestly believe this is the truth. I hate all my class papers, but whenever I have to do a peer review, I realize why professors compliment.

>>15411271
>>15411423
kek
I was big into Poe and Coleridge in high school, my teachers would always shit on me for “archaic and obtuse” language when we were supposed to be concisely debating the merits of gay marriage and globalism but my autism was too powerful for them

>>15411263
can i see it?

>>15412180
Seconded, I am interested

>>15409680
>never study
>always get A's
>never feel motivated to try at anything because I'm so intelligent in certain areas and pick up things without trying
This sucks but I wouldn't trade it for anything

>>15411423
You were probably writing the standard AP student sentences, where you write a lot, but never say anything. Otherwise, your writing wasn't clear and/or not grammatically correct.

>>15409680
Literally O homem que sabia javanês.

>>15409680
Anon, you aren't the hack fraud. Your teachers were.

>>15409680
>Ghost write a friend's paper for which they received some prais received
>Too lazy to write a paper for a class I'm in and end up failing

>>15411263
Yeah I’d actually love to see this. Please share anon

>>15409680
>skip school until I'm almost expelled in twelfth grade
>took AP English despite the fact I never bother to show up
>rocking a solid 27%
>book report worth 20% of final grade
>final worth 30%
>read half of Oliver Twist two days before essay is due
>shit out a couple thousand words in the library at school the day it is due
>teacher gives me an 87% but notes that almost everything I mentioned happened in the first half
>get 92% on the final exam
>get my AP English Literature credit as well
>barely graduate

>>15411423
>>15412127
I was studying Latin at the time so my grammar was air tight. For long sentences, I would condense them during self-editing, and, concerning polysyllabic words, I used those sparingly.

>>15412211
This is me. A pampered effortless life fucks you up when you really need to try.

>>15411104
>I also copy and pasted paragraphs of some Civil War general's Wikipedia entry for a paper in 2nd grade and never got caught
Lmao wtf, your teacher didn't get suspicious you had the prose of a wikipedia article in 2nd grade?

>>15411104
lol. ty for sharing

>>15412440
Wish this was me. I get B's without putting any effort. If I just spent a few more hours, I probably wouldn't have dropped out of my prestigious uni and attend shitty city college.

>>15412211
you and i are opposites
i study my arse off and hardly manage to even get a B
your talents are wasted

>>15409680
I used to get average between 70 - 80% on highschool essays by running Wikipedia through google Translate a couple times and shuffling the paragraphs around so their plagiarism program wouldn't catch it. Only a few handful I wrote on subjects I actually cared about. For english class I would also take 2 french short stories and blend them together, think up the worst possible ending scenario and translate into english.

>>15412551
Oh yeah, and the only time I ever got caught for "plagiarism" was for a project I'd written myself.

>>15412390
School is for fucking morons dude. That was a way smarter move.

>>15409680

That's exactly the point. You're so good at it that you're criticizing yourself, apparently.

>>15411314

This reminds me of the time in high school when we were all tasked with "grading" each other's work. I got this one guy's stuff. He had decent verbal skill, nice enough guy, I went over to his house for parties once or twice. Even had a glint of intelligence in his eyes. I would have described him as acquaintance/slight friend, hang-around dude.

I was shocked. Incoherent sentences, the usual high-school tier their/they're-its-it's and so on, but it was so consistent throughout that it hurt to read. I marked it middling-low since we were about to graduate and would never see each other again anyway, but also to soften the blow a bit. Guy could not write to save his life and he wasn't even "stupid", if you know what I mean. Sympathy for the teacher who has to read all this crap.

>>15409680
>final exam on french
>haven't studied
>haven't been to class in 3 or 4 weeks
>400 word essay on some book about some muslim girl
>spend intro making parallels to Aisha cause I haven't even read the summary to the book
>shit out 2000+ word obscurantist Enron style fuckfest
>all just reasserts intro
>conclusion is intro with sentences swapped around
>90% mark

>>15412613
>Be in middle school
>Have to write two short stories for English class
>It was an assigned part of the curriculum the teacher had to do
>My friends do theirs
>I'm the reader of the group so they ask me to look at theirs
>The first one is genuinely incomprehensible.
>Manage to get him to the point where at least every sentence is individually readable
>Teacher gives everyone who handed in anything 100%, never reads a single one

I don't blame him

>>15411385
>>turns out the teacher didn't read it either and I passed the assignment
Based

>>15411417
No fucking way

>>15412211
Did the same but for Bs and Cs. Would have settled for barely passing. Just didn't want to be there. My mom would get pissed off at me cause I'd always read history and non-fiction. She'd say "where the fuck is all that information going? it's not showing in your notes." stuff like that.

>>15412716
I shit you not. I didn't go full /pol/ or anything, I just rambled about immigrants being shit and stealing jobs for 2 minutes and pretended to take drags on an imaginary ciggy between sentences to think of more to say.
The play was called Norm and Ahmed.

>>15412738
>pretended to take drags on an imaginary ciggy between sentences to think of more to say
I do this IRL but it's just to do something with my hands or after I said something cringe

>>15411417
lmao. Asked a teacher if I could use wigger in a short story and ended up calling a guy bitch wigger every other sentence.

>>15412744
fucking kek

>>15411104
Post the paper

>>15411385
based if true, what was the book?

>>15412127
I fucking hate dumb cunts like you. I love watching you retards get shit on in STEM classes because you make your shitty reports 10 times longer than they need to be by filling it with dumb unnecessary bullshit. If you're not writing fiction than you should be concise. Otherwise you're basically a woman.

>>15412778
>promotes utilitarian language on literature board
What next? Gonna start shilling for pidgin?

>>15412211
I feel the same. Teachers always said I could get A's and be the top of the class if I tried but I never did. I settled for Bs by doing every assignment the night before and winging tests. I was just so bored of it. They cover shit you could learn in 1 week over 6 weeks. I spent half my time sleeping and the other half I faked being sick and stayed home. I regret it now though. I wish I had the motivation to go to school and do well because now I'm in Uni and still a procrastinating fuckwit even well into 3rd year. Also, the guy who was top of the class in my school is getting fucking destroy by Uni. He's doing some meme STEM generic "SCIENCE" class and barely passing. Last semester he dropped 2 classes and was still struggling with the other 2. Why does the shit happen? Why do the people who try hard get shit on while lazy fucks like me don't try at all, don't make use of any natural talent, and just waste their life pass without problem?

>>15412789
>Indubitably, the answer to the question previously posed can be deduce from the previous formula, henceforth known as formula (4), and it may be shown that when performed correctly it generates a result proximal to that of the numerical discrete integer 5.
>The answer from formula 4 is 5.
Being an obtuse retard doesn't make you special.

>>15412831
sure, but this has nothing to do with literature

>>15412831
Works for lawyers.

>>15412839
>Utilitarian literature isn't literature.
ok bud, clearly your big brain is too much for me to handle

>>15412842
Well, their job is to obfuscate laws from normal people so they can charge out the ass for an interpreter.

>>15412857
You're the type of person responsible for the reduction of language we see today.
>book too long too many pages big words too much watch tv instead

>>15412873
>he likes to read scientific articles which are condensed and get to the point quickly
>he's literally the book hitler who's genociding all muh big words from fiction
You're a retard. If you can't understand that there's a time and place for different styles of writing I suggest you go back to grade 6 and try that shit again. When I read non-fiction I want to understand the topic as quickly as possible, especially if it's for my job. If I read a fiction book I don't care how long it takes because I'm distracting myself and the most important part is enjoyment. Get it through your thick skull.

>>15412886
The guy he's replying too wasn't talking about using it in fucking scientific studies retard. Using flowery language and adjectives in debates is commonplace because it's a fucking emotionally charged popularity contest.

>>15412911
>we were supposed to be concisely debating
Even if it is some gay shit like fags being fags that doesn't make it fiction where you need to right a bunch of flowery crap to stuff every sentence.

>>15412931
It's debate you fucking pinhead imp dunce dipshit mong. Literally all that matters is swaying the reader in your favor by any and all means including the use of favorable language. Fucking knuckle dragging chimpanzee.

>8th grade
>a week of writing one poem a day
>straight up just take the lyrics from blood and thunder
>English teacher praises the fuck out of me, reads it in front of the class and other periods
>swear she knew but just never confronted me about it

>>15412558
How did you get "caught for plagiarism" then?

>>15412944
Teacher ran it through some program they had. I have no idea how it picked it up but the wikipedia copying I mentioned above pretty much started happening because of that. He gave me detention for talking back and not accepting that it was plagiarism. Pretty sure that was the last project I actually gave a shit about till 12th grade and that happened in 7th.

>>15412939
You're wrong. See how I just convinced everyone you're wrong in less words?

>>15412778
>If you're not writing fiction than you should be concise.
You should absolutely be concise when writing fiction. If you're not, your agent and publisher will make you.

>>15412944
Oh yeah also it was about Alcatraz and was pretty much just a summary of the big escape attempt.

>>15410211
Is that real

>>15412613
>be in University, waste of time Creative Writing class
>do a silly palimpsest activity, where you write a few lines of poetry and then pass it on to the next person to write over the top of it
>my neighbour is a kindhearted, well-meaning but thick-as-pigshit middle-aged woman, divorced I think
>she gives me her work, pathetic drivel
>I think that it will just get passed on to the next person and she won'tssee it again, so I shit all over it - literally writing "SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT"
>teacher tells us to pass back to the person before us and read what is written
>she reads it out, tears in her eyes, while class of mongs stares at me like I'm the devil incarnate
>get A+
>become literary critic
>can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs

>>15412974
holy fuck.

>>15412959
Turnitin and similar applications can return false positives, so it's not unbelievable, even if it is doubtful. In any case, I don't know whether teachers are forced to use these applications by the administrators, but I worked with student writers for four years, and it's not hard to tell when a student plagiarizes something; though, it does take work.

>>15412974
Exquisite corpse games are always silly. Why try to take it so seriously?

>>15412966
Well, that may have been a false positive due to how many times escape attempts have been recounted, or you may have written some shit paraphrase.

>>15412990
I had never even thought about trying to beat plagiarism programs before that. From that point on I did my projects with the explicit intent of beating the program. Why would I risk trying for real and getting a fail, when I know that I can just copy Wikipedia, run it through translate a bunch, clean it up, and use all the Wikipedia sources in my bibliography?

>>15412990
It's complete bullshit though. It only ever catches the biggest retards who are so dumb they forget to reformat the font and remove hyperlinks so it doesn't matter anyway. Or people who copy several different writing styles into one report. You can literally copy from Wikipedia and as long as you change the sentence structure around a bit. Like instead of "X happens because of Y" you change it to "Because Y, X happens" and you're good to go.

>>15413015
Well, any false positive should be readily identifiable by an instructor. Now, depending on the rigor required of the academic dishonesty standards of your department or school, maybe an incorrect citation or three was the culprit. I can't say (nor do I agree with such rigor), and it may be that your original and correct work got flagged incorrectly, and the teacher never investigated. Hell, like citation generation, maybe these programs are just bad and shouldn't be used. I can say that you should've fought it. I don't quibble much with your solution, really, even if you gave up some writing practice to employ it.

>>15413020
That's fair. I don't have experience with any application designed to catch plagiarism (I've done without), and really, changing the words and syntax of a source is part of the paraphrase process, so what you're describing is almost the work I'd expect of an honest writer.

>>15413000
This wasn't exquisite corpse, it was a palimpsest activity, writing on top of (and not just adding to) what is already there. I don't know what was the desired outcome - probably not tears.

>>15413091
Did you at least apologize or did you just sit there awkwardly like an autistic retard?

>>15412959
How does one gain such mental fortitude to prevent violent revenge in a situation like that. I can't imagine myself being able to resist the urge to rape and kill that bitch for doing that to me

>>15413091
Ah, I thought you were searching for an explanation. My bad. Anyway, I imagine the goal of this activity was to engage in play and low stakes writing. It seems silly to judge writing produced in such a situation, but whatever.

>>15413108
I got fucked on a lot in school from the start so by that time that was nothing. 12th grade I was literally walking around in a trenchcoat and army boots joking about clearing out the place. People kept coming up to me unironically asking if I thought they were chill and telling me to give them a heads up.

>>15413100
I apologised profusely and tried to convince her that I was making fun of myself, not her. I don't know though, there's something about reading "SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT" all over your poetry, in public, that I imagine makes it hard to believe the man who wrote it.

>>15411385
Kafkaesque

>>15413120
Forgot the twist ending.
>Reader, I married her.

>>15413119
Based. At least at that point people stop fucking with you, right?

>>15413135
Not that anon, but in my experience, they just fuck with you more.

>>15413112
It was less the writing than the activity I was judging. She was collateral damage. But yeah, I still feel regret, hence confession.

>be me
>write a 2500-word essay on the historicism of the self developed by Byron throughout his eastern tales, positing the idea that his work preempted Heidegger by almost a century
>get an 80 and professor says I should consider sending in to The Byron Journal
>have never read a single Byron poem all the way through and just flicked to random pages in my Collected Works to find loosely relevant quotes
Watch out for me in the next few years, I’m going to be big.

>>15413141
Well, yeah, those activities are intensely silly, but I've found it easier (and ultimately more fun) to just embrace junk like that. I think a lot of students are too self conscious to write spur of the moment and/or share their work, and I suspect these activities help in rapport building.

>>15413146
fuark uleh thats fully hectik
ur gonna be the next stephen king uleh

>collect philosophy books to look smart whenever a girl comes over
>have never read a book
>at best listen to it on audible

In my defense, I listen to them like 10 times each to the point I remember most of it, I don't read though.

>>15413219
I get seizures imagining the critique of pure reason in audiobook form.

>>15413146
>professor says you should send work into journal
>only gave it a C

>>15409680
I can highly recommend Kleider machen Leute.

It is a book about cutter who is mistaken for a duke, because he wears really nice clothing. And he stumbles from event to event. The Name is german and means Clothing makes People ( not a great translation ).

Its about how appearance shapes the impression you make and how to deal with being an imposter.

It is extremely short, about 50 Pages, you can read it in two hours max. I had to read it as a kid and didnt really get the message and I thought it was true bullshit. But I read it again 8 years later and was fascinated. It went into the head of the imposter. And paints a fell written picture.

7/10 would recommend, because its a good and quick read.

Here the entire Story if you wanna read it:

https://www.prosperosisle.org/spip.php?article907

>>15413234
>college offers 2 whole courses for CoPR, one at Grad and one at undergrad

>>15413275
>an 80 is a C
maybe in some meme american university where they give every special snowflake an A and the only thing to separate the good students from the shit ones is a fucking +

>>15413275
Professors don't suggest you send things to publishers without thinking that the student will continue to improve the work (probably even asking the professor to discuss future revisions). A promising draft that only warrants a middling grade can still be turned into an excellent and publishable essay.

>>15413377
7,8,9, and 10 point grading scales have 80 as a C

>>15413275
A C in the UK would be 40-49%, not 80%

>>15412453
She didn't read it I think. The point was that you wrote a paper about some guy in history and dressed up as them for this event where younger kids would tour the "living museum" and you would answer questions about who you are n shit

>>15412297
I went back and read a paper I wrote in AP Euro on Napoleon and I'm amazed at how any of the shit I wrote didn't immediately fail me. Every fucking sentence says as much as 2 words do

i have adhd up and i remember in middle school whenever i would be asked to write what the authors message was i would always just summarize the whole story and the teacher would give me a D and call me a retard each time

>>15413334
>The Name is german and means Clothing makes People ( not a great translation ).
English has an idiom for this already. "Clothes make the man"

>>15412798
>Why does the shit happen? Why do the people who try hard get shit on while lazy fucks like me don't try at all, don't make use of any natural talent, and just waste their life pass without problem?
It's not that the people who try hard get shit on. It's that you probably come from a "disadvantaged" background and your peers from that background never had much intellectual talent to begin with. I had some problems in school, but put in effort in junior and senior year, and now I'm at one of the top unis in the country and on the planet. And I'm doing quite well for myself here.
If you don't feel like putting in effort, and I understand that, it's probably because you haven't yet found the thing that you really, really wanna devote your life to yet. See if you can find that thing, and then throw yourself wholeheartedly into it.

>>15412778
You know nothing about me, I excelled in science and studied it in university. I am more accomplished and intelligent than you in every way and I could beat you in a fight IRL should you choose to disclose your full name and place of residence right now.

>>15413995
What do you do? I'm in my 3rd year of Electrical Engineering and while I'm interested in it, more than any other STEM field, I find it's just the same memorization shit as highschool. To be honest, there's other things I'm more interested in but the biggest question I always ask myself is what's more financially viable. I certainly don't want to end up as a English major serving coffee.

>>15414049
Is this a new copypasta?

>>15411104
>paper in 2nd grade

LARP with a capital L A R P

>>15414070
I'm doing history, and I'll be applying to graduate school next semester. I have no clue whether or not I'll get in anywhere, and even if I do, I have no clue if there'll be a job waiting for me on the other end, but I literally cannot imagine doing anything else with my life, so I'm taking the plunge.
As far as your situation goes, I know a guy who did his undergrad in CS, worked for a few years, then came back to do a PhD in what he really wanted to do. You might consider a similar path.
If you're in your third year, it's already too late to change your major and do something else, but don't be afraid to make long-term plans that involve attempts to make a living off of what you like to do.

>>15413275
Anything above 70 is a first class degree in the UK. Anything about 80 is automatically suggested for publication. Anything above 90 is super rare.

>>15409680
The Impostor Factory (La Fabrique des Imposteurs, not sure it's been translated but it probably will soon enough) by Roland Gori.
It's exactly about why our society produces the kind of successful frauds you describe.

>>15409894
Nice anon. Here's mine:

>write a short-story for a hs assigment
>spend the better part of the week on it, end up with 15 pages and several interlocked subplots
>teacher pulls me aside after class and asks if I'm really the one who wrote
>I am but no way to prove it
>didn't expect this.jpg

>>15409876
Unfortunately not sorry.

>>15409776
been there

>>15412211
Unfortunately it'll end up biting you in the ass later unless you choose a line of work much below your talent.
I was the same as you and aimed high. I don't recommend.

>professor asks us in seminar to talk about any difficulties we're having doing essays
>think, for some reason, it would be funny and endearing to talk about how I leave all my essays to the last minute.
>"haha I'm such a doofus, I always do my essays the night before ahaha, got any tips on motivation haha"
>nobody laughs
>realize I've fucked up, keep taking though, start dropping spaghetti
>my friend next to me stares at the ground in embqressment
>my professor just glares at me
>"wow. That's really bad."
>end up do his essay night before
>only professor to see through my bullshit and give me a bad grade.

>>15409680
>forget to write paper
>don't know what to do
>decide to take a shit in the paper hand-in box
>next day there is an uproar in class
>everyone is mad because their papers had shit all over them
>prof is so pissed he can barely talk
>he offers reward for anyone with info on who shit in the box
>decide talk to prof to collect reward
>tell him it was me
>he doesn't believe me because no one would be retarded enough to admit to shitting in the box
>it goes unsolved
>class gets an extension on their papers
>the due day rolls around again
>i have forgotten again so i shit in the box again because why not
>the teacher is FURIOUS everyone is fucking BERSERK that their papers have SHIT on them
>i raise my hand again to calmly explain that i shit in the box twice
>this time they believe me
>i get expelled
>doesn't matter had sex

>>15414336
but what did you have sex with

>Carefully craft sonnets and poems in terza rima
>Get told it's mediocre
>Shit out semi-rhyming free verse
>"You have talent"

>>15412974
you give me hope that it was not a curse to be born with a set of horns. thank you and God bless you

>>15412741
kek'd

>have AOL Instant Messenger
>offhandedly mention Dante's Inferno in my profile bio
>get a message from some random college student asking me to explain the book to them
>I haven't read this fucking book
>completely make shit up about the nine circles to hell being allegorical to Freud's conception of the mind, with the Id and everything
>college student probably wrote our conversation into an essay that failed her
>I was like 12 at the time

>>15409680
Stoner

>>15415253
Positively based

>>15412180
>>15412188
I'll look for it. I'm using a different laptop and unsure if I backed it up

>>15409680
Literally all of Marx's work

>>15411363
That's more of a Car Salesman than a hack fraud, I'd say.

>>15410211
Wtf how did they teach a cat to do Bruce Springsteen dance!!!!????

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=129kuDCQtHs

I'm looking to plagiarise for a writing contest. Is this plausible? I'm not going to directly plagiarise just really really push the "inspiration" thing, if you know what I mean, which is pretty much, you could say, plagiarism.

>>15410211
Yo, is that gif real?

>>15412961
>>15412931
>>15412886
>>15412857
>>15412831
>>15412778

You're not in STEM, you're obviously underaged. This site is +18.

>>15412969
>>15415604
>>15415604
I'm being trolled?

>>15415860
wow you got me bud, it was all just an elaborate ploy. Are you going to write about your experience with the alt-right trolls for your next 50% of total grade English assignment?

>>15412211
what do people actually study for this to work in college? i got all a's in high school without trying but pretty much as soon as i got into college (stem) that stopped working. i dropped out after the second semester basically because i couldn't cope.

>>15410211
You idiots, its fake

>>15415894
No, cause I'm actually in STEM and know you're talking out of your ass.

Shouldn't you be watching the latest Rick & Morty episode?

>>15416061
Let me guess, some gay shit like biomed, right?

>>15416043
I study EE and it mostly works. Although there are times when there's a lot of pressure and stress because I left something to the last minute or only do a few hours of study right before an exam. Of course it's not great for your GPA either. I was planning on getting my shit together this semester and then corona happened.

>>15416119
You're ignorance is astounding but no, I did something easier than BioMed, Electrical Engineering.

Whatever though, you really should stop browsing this site for your age and look into the things you talk about because you know nothing about fiction, non-fiction or STEM.

>>15416200
lmao, okay faggot

>>15416237
Looks like you have some reading to do, maybe you'll get something through your thick skull.

>>15414264
>>15413407
Really?

>>15416043
I took dual-enrollment classes and outside of some math struggles I still came out with all As

>>15416636
No, I'm lying.

>mfw never did gay ass literary analysis because I'm a STEMfag

>>15412959
You can look up those programs and run them on the essay yourself, then just edit until it doesn't catch it.
t. whole friend group never caught for plagiarism

Try reading Can't Hurt Me by David Goggins. It is undoubtedly written by a mid-/no-wit, but it emphasizes in an unintentionally poetic way how cheating/being a "hack fraud" will only ruin your life. Your teachers don't suffer if no one reads the book - you do.

>>15409680
My diarrhea: day soup.

This piece of shit book got assigned to me in college because the author was an alum. We had to write a paper comparing it to Catcher in the Rye. I'd already read Catcher in the Rye in high school and didn't feel like reading it again. I did not feel like reading some garbage ass book just because an alum wrote it and refused to read it.

I wrote the paper the night before it was due without reading the book and just basing my paper off of in class discussions. I think I got a B.

The fucking professor who assigned it retired and now self publishes a bunch of crappy books on Amazon. Just what you want a professor emeritus to be doing.

>>15416850
wow, I can tell it's complete dogshit just by looking at the cover. Unbelievably based.

>>15409894
You fucking nerd dweeb hahaha

>>15416867
>Unbelievably based.

What's based about a shit book?

>>15416913
The shit cover to alert you not to read it.

>>15411423
What kind of AP English program did you have where you had to write essays?

At my high school the AP English class had all kinds of bullshit projects like making a movie poster for Tess of the d'Urbervilles and a huge final project that was essentially just scrapbooking. It was looked at so badly by a big chunk of the students that a lot of high achievers refused to take it and took an AP English class online instead.

>>15416918
Based

People say not to judge books by their covers, but there are a lot of cases where you should.

>>15409862
Same.

>>15413135
>>15413140
They stopped fucking with me cause I also shaved my head and started agro bumping into people in the hallways. Plus it was my grampa's old army trench coat and it had a leather holster sewn into the breast of it.

>>15416957
I had AP English in some backwater shit hole, and we wrote a timed essay every week.

>>15416850
>this dude goes to Columbia
doxxed lmao

>>15417900
I didn't go to Columbia, I went to Beloit. I would sincerely hope an institution like Columbia wouldn't assign that shit novel.

>mfw my parents spent $160,000 to send me to liberal arts college and afterwards I went back to work at the same menial job I worked in high school

>>15417900
The guy who wrote that book didn't go to Columbia

>>15412778
Seething gen chem lab 100 series TA or too stupid to even reach that level?

>>15409680
Bajtin, is that you?
Weren't you dead?
Fucking formalists, Stalin should've sent you tu Siberia.

>>15409876
It's okay. I'm sure Reddit will accept you as you are.

>>15414336
did you get the reward

>>15409680
>Be poor literature student from Argentina.
>My only passion is Borges. Yet hate studying any other autor.
>Peronist goberment fucks the economy once again.
>Decide to make money ghostwriting essays for lazy rich fucks from first world countries.
>Do essays on electrical instalations on hospitals, winging it with google. Charge $100.
>With that I can pay rent for two months in my ghetto.
>Write an essay on self esteem. lel.
>Venezuela government fucks their economy even further.
>Suddenly start to compete for clients with Venezuelans with doctorates that charge even less than me.
>Drop out of college. Decide that education is a piramid scheme.
>Keep reading Borges while taking my CISCO certificate.

Fucking Venezuelans. I hope their economy never recovers.

>>15419679
>>Decide to make money ghostwriting essays for lazy rich fucks from first world countries.
How do I get in on this?

>>15420072
First you need to be from a third world country shithole. Otherwise they will tell you to get a real job flipping burgers.
Then you create a social media offering your services.
Suck their dicks all you can. Earn those shekels and demonstrate to them you have no dignity at all.
Then after a couple of works well done they will recommend you to other rich lazy fucks.
Then a fucking starved venezuelan fuck with two doctorates in sociology will take your job because he charges one kilo of rice for essay.

>>15412778
>STEM classes
Imagine striving to become a grunt

>>15415396
You better post it on the warosu