/lit/ - Literature

>>15257668
>At the age of 23 Anon had the biggest penis in the world
>At the age of 2X OP was sucking at said penis

>>15257668
wrote my diary desu

I made the minor literature chart and I have a youtube channel a few people like

>>15257668
Nietzsche and Schopenhauer are completely achievable

>>15257668
-Became fluent in 4 languages at the age of 23.
-Scholarship in one of my countries best colleges
-Rich family and max Nepotism at the snap of my fingers
-Good with women
-Good productive habits
-4chan shitposter and Jew hater

Tell all those faggot philosophers to calm down

>mfw at the age of 27 i'm a shut in neet

>>15257690
post it

>>15257668
im 20 and i made money

>>15257705

i made the rene guenon chart and singlehandedly destroyed this board

>>15257866
C-can I have some? Help out a litbro, haha

I got myself into civil service with enough time in my hands, thanks to the little work I actually have to do, to read all the works of Nietzsche, Goethe, Pascal, Schopenhauer and others and get paid for it.

>>15257668
I've coomed to a lot of hentai

>>15257668
-Fluent in English and Latin
-Got into a fully funded MFA Program
-Recently completed a perennial philosophy based Epic poem
-people already saying "This is what T.S Eliot wished he had the ability to pull off"
-only started writing poetry 2 years ago

HOES MAD
HOES MAD
HOES MAD

I'm happy

>22
>comfy job
>read 15 books this year
>losing weight
I'm doin all right

>>15257906
lies

>>15257705
Yes, you did all of that dear anonymous poster
>Posts written here are a work of fiction
OHNONONONO

>>15257668
>At 50 anon set out on his final journey to conquer Butterfly

>>15257668
I’ve harassed hundreds of roastie whores on the internet and made them seethe with rage

>>15257929
Not everyone who browses this shithole of a site is an incel loser anon

>>15257904
>-Recently completed a perennial philosophy based Epic poem
cringe lmao

>>15257668
I'm 23 and have written a tremendous amount. That being said, I see no reason why I should care for praise from people I do not know, institutions I do not respect, and payment from awards when I already make good money.

>>15257904
>Recently completed a perennial philosophy based Epic poem
post it

>>15257875
I hope you're honest.
If so, well done.

>>15257668
I am a Good Will Hunting-esque genius.

On the one hand it's a blessing, but on the other it's an almost unbearable curse. All my life I've aced every test I've ever set. I've failed at practically nothing. Even in sports I excelled while other "academic" kids refused to even take part. I've just completed my BA in English Lit at the age of 19 and I'm about to start on my MA (fully-funded scholarship), but I don't know how long I can continue being a genius before I eventually burn out or break down. My professors all tell me that I stand out and that's it's obvious that I'm destined for great things. Heck, one of them has said outright that he wishes he had possessed my intelligence and work-rate when he was my age. Whether it's math or science or literature I just excel in everything I do without even considering that there was an option that I could not. Just last semester I solved a theorem that people had been working on for the past two decades (I won't say which one because my name is now indelibly linked with said theorem) and that was a for a class I wasn't even supposed to have attended. Psychiatrists have said that people in my very small demographic of highly intellectual individuals usually suffer from aspergers or some related disorder which deprives them of a healthy social life, but I have surprised each one in turn when I inform them that in fact I am an incredibly sociable and well-liked individual (despite also being a mysterious hermit-like recluse) and that every girl I have either dated or simply penetrated a bunch of times has described me as the kind of guy they could really see themselves with long-term.

>>15257668
Different times, different lifestyles, different educations. At earlier ages, boys got married, yet here I am, a single man. Time's change OP

>>15257710
Same but not a NEET and only real event is getting a college diploma.

>>15257906
Most based post I’ve seen all day.

>>15257890
please please tell me how I get one of these lazy government jobs. This is literally what I aspire to, at least as a day job until I write something decent enough to get published. What major should I chose in college, preferably non-stem, for what careers? I have no idea what to major in right now and I'm desperate. All I know is I don't want slave away in some office when I could be reading in some office instead.

>>15257906
Extremely based. Wish I could say the same and mean it

>>15257705
>Rich family and max Nepotism at the snap of my fingers
lol join the club

>>15258063
Say something interesting. Prove it.

>age 23
>fluent in Portuguese, English and Spanish
>have written three political theory mega-essays, each of around 800 to 1000 pages of length that I have no idea how to publish
>live with mom, make money as professional gambler, give money to mom so she can buy more and better groceries

It's a pretty retarded life.

>>15258102
respectable

>>15258063
Biggest larp I've read all day

>>15258063
Do you tell them you post on 4chan
Might change their mind

>>15258102
How to gamble successfully?

>>15257906
genuinely based

>>15257906
Best post ITT

>>15257686
fpbp

>>15257906
based

>>15258110
There are many books on how to play poker or be a better sports player, but I mostly just bet on soccer games where it looks extremely likely that a team is going to win to make a safe quick buck.

>>15258125
What championships are the most predictable? Do you follow team news and form?

>>15258134
Here in Brazil it's Libertadores and Copa das Américas. But any game where they use the decimal odds, if one number is like 4 or 5 more than the other, such as, one has a 1.05 and the other has a 7.02 chance of winning, the one with the smallest number is going to win.

>>15257904
LARP

>>15258147
So you go for many small time bets

>>15258092
something interesting

>>15258232
indeed, but most are not as miserable, as 1.05, often you get a decent odd, even doubling your cash

>>15257668
at the age of 40 he began to prepare to plan his first novel.

>>15257668
I'm 18
>I moved countries by myself
>fluent in English, Italian, Spanish, Portuguese and I'm learning Italian (Latin will be next)
>got into my dream uni
>I have friends, get along with my family and I'm in a great relationship
It's all pretty nice and comfy, I have hobbies and I'm probably going to get engaged in the next 2 years. Not as glamorous as inventing the calculator but I'm happy

>>15258076
I work as a research analyst at a large public university. It’s extremely easy and I’m actually required to be there no more than 35 hours most weeks. I get a month and a half of paid vacation and many other absurd benefits. I studied economics but there’s a high demand for people with math/stats, computer science, and information technology backgrounds. Other than that, it’s basically just getting lucky with something extremely niche.

>>15258435
>English, Italian, Spanish, Portuguese and I'm learning Italian

>>15257921
Good for you anon :)

>>15257906
:)

>>15257668
>At the age of 28, I edged (masturbating) for 12 hours, with 5 minute breaks every hour.
>At the age of 30, I am still a KHV NEET, and I get wrist pain when I masturbate over 30 minutes so I gave up on edging

>>15257668
>At the age of 44, Wallace Stevens published his first book

>>15257668
I don't think we'll see young genius like this ever again. Imagine what you could of gotten done as a kid if you weren't distracted by vidya, porn, internet, entertainment, and didn't have friends.

>>15257712
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC70DBZLtHVkScdx49McB6NA

I turn 24 in October and I have accomplished nothing. I did, however, do some cocaine today and then wrote 6 pages of my novel, which is at 78 pages now. It's not much, but it's something.

>>15257668
I'm accomplishing my own dream, what else matters? All of those people were tortured souls and I'm probably happier than most of them. I'm also more "successful" than 90% of my own generation. I wouldn't trade my life for theirs, I honestly wouldn't.

Guys if I have no creative talent at all how should I go about writing? Idk what to write about or why I want to do it but I feel like it would be good for me.

>>15258762
Journalism.

>>15257668
>25
I made an app years ago, but I don't know how to release it.

>>15257906
COPING OVERACHIEVERS WR*TERS BTFO

>accomplish
Is only stalling the inevitable having done anything at all?

>>15258435
You still haven't learned Latin yet? Yikes. I was fluent by 14. Maybe one day, anon.

>>15257668
>Just turned 18 last month
>Starting my MA in classics next year at Yale
>Fluent in English, Russian, Arabic, Russian, Mandarin, Ancient Greek and Latin
>Getting my first novel published next year
>Also getting married to my high-school sweet heart next year
Things are finally looking up for me.

>>15257668
Nietzsche also died from the syphilis he contracted losing his virginity to a prostitute because he broke his brain trying to reconcile being a Christian and still having your own morals

>>15258850
me too, but I also know aramaic. catch up, kiddo

>>15258591

What the fuck is this

>>15257668
>turned 18 almost a year ago
>fat midwit retard going studying to become a tech monkey

>>15258063
I am a Good Will Hunting-esque genius.

On the one hand it's a blessing, but on the other it's an almost unbearable curse. All my life I've aced every test I've ever set. I've failed at practically nothing. Even in sports I excelled while other "academic" kids refused to even take part. I've just completed my BA in English Lit at the age of 19 and I'm about to start on my MA (fully-funded scholarship), but I don't know how long I can continue being a genius before I eventually burn out or break down. My professors all tell me that I stand out and that's it's obvious that I'm destined for great things. Heck, one of them has said outright that he wishes he had possessed my intelligence and work-rate when he was my age. Whether it's math or science or literature I just excel in everything I do without even considering that there was an option that I could not. Just last semester I solved a theorem that people had been working on for the past two decades (I won't say which one because my name is now indelibly linked with said theorem) and that was a for a class I wasn't even supposed to have attended. Psychiatrists have said that people in my very small demographic of highly intellectual individuals usually suffer from aspergers or some related disorder which deprives them of a healthy social life, but I have surprised each one in turn when I inform them that in fact I am an incredibly sociable and well-liked individual (despite also being a mysterious hermit-like recluse) and that every girl I have either dated or simply penetrated a bunch of times has described me as the kind of guy they could really see themselves with long-term.

>>15257668
yeah the world was also 10x smaller back then

>>15259098
>excelling in artificial settings makes you a genius

Oh boy, have I got some bad news for you

>>15257906
How will OP ever recover?

By 30 Caesar had still accomplished absolutely nothing and thought himself a loser.

>>15260057
god, can you imagine living back in those times

I came in a vagina at 16 and then in an anus at 23.

>>15257668
Have my own English School. Underpay a bunch of filopinos to teach kids how to say the alphabet while I sit at home reading and doing hobbies.

I feel sorry for human calculators, they only know how to be used by the state and never achieve happiness. Hence why teh Sci posters run away in tears every time they come here.

I just farted and a tiny bit of poopy came out and now I am changing my pajama pants.

>>15258034

>In part because of Ritschl's support, Nietzsche received a remarkable offer in 1869 to become professor of classical philology at the University of Basel in Switzerland. He was only 24 years old and had neither completed his doctorate nor received a teaching certificate ("habilitation"). He was awarded an honorary doctorate by the University of Leipzig, again with Ritschl's support.
Lucky bugger

>>15257906
Literally wanted to post "happiness". OP is a faggot.

>>15257668
Absolutely nothing

>>15257668
>at the age of 13 anon jacked off for the first time to a celine dion music video
>at the age of 15 anon began jacking off in to socks
>at the age of 17 anon lost his virginity but shortly after discovered microwaved banana peels feel excellent
>at the age of 18 anon decided women arent worth the effort and subscribed to bangbros premium with his first paycheck
>at the age of 26 anon stopped caring about everything and began ejaculating and urinating in cups so he didnt have to move
>at the age of 30 anon discovered virtual reality pornography and then spent over 1000$ on masturbation accesories


who knows what could happen next

>>15257906
BS. If you're happy in this gay modern world you are not paying close enough attention.

>>15260797
maybe if you have a large family that allows you to stay busy and you focus on the kids and making sure theyre formed the way you wish

>>15258552
Probably heroin.

>>15260825
That's the one.

>>15258762
Haruki Murakami suffers from the same thing and it hasn't stopped him. Basically read a bunch and sit down to write for a set period every day

>>15258063
>or simply penetrated a bunch of times

You were doing an okay job until this

Done anal with two different girls

>>15257705
sounds legit

>>15260778
>anon gets drunk while listening to his neighbors have sex and spends 15 minutes writing a post only he thinks is funny
>anon realizes his post would be much funnier if he had included some meta /lit/ jab at the end
>anon is retarded so he cant figure out how to put his own agony in to coherent word so he just replies to his own post

>>15257906
Congrats. What did you do?

>>15260859
Based

>>15257906
God I wish that were me

>>15260859
How do you convince a girl to do anal? My gf never wants to do it and I cant convince her baka

>>15260928
One, she's stupid. Two:
>Convince
Oh no no no, you're going about it all wrong.
First time I did anal it was only because me and my gf at the time had run out of condoms. I was still horny and a bj wouldn't cut it. So I started playing around with her ass little by little, then I just put it in. Nothing more to it. Her mom called in the middle of it and she answered the phone which was pretty funny

My current gf always liked when I played with her ass but we didn't do anal for awhile. But the thing is I tried to make it seem like I was doing her the favor. She liked me playing with her ass so much that she was more than willing. Got a bunch of lube then went to town, and now I have free reign, don't even need lube anymore and she cums like crazy from it.

But you gotta put it in her mind before you put it in her butt. Next time you're fingering her just rest one of your fingers on her hole, increase stimulation every few minutes. Just try and get a finger in there whenever you guys have sex from now on. Eventually she'll succumb.

>>15260950
i hate you for even writing such a post. anal isnt even better than pussy. fuck you nerds

>>15258762
i feel the same way. I don't have any ideas or talent yet for all my life i've had this feeling deep down that i just need to do smthing creative. Even if it's just for myself.

>>15260958
>getting anal makes you a nerd
It's different than pussy and can definitely be better sometimes
Jealous faggot

https://www.goalcast.com/2018/06/26/8-successful-people-found-success-later-life/

it's never too late stay whitepilled lads.

>>15260965
not even remotely jealous of some lecherous nerd

>>15257668
I shitpost on 4chan

>>15258591
Holy based as fuck. What camera do you use?

>>15258762
Write 500 words every day. 180 days in you will have written a 90k word book (that is very decent sized)

>>15257668
By the age of 20 I had masturbated more times than Neitzsche did in his entire life.

>>15257906
Godspeed anon

>>15257668
24
>selfpublished a graphic novel
>wrote 5 short stories that are on my website
>can play 2 instruments wel, the third kinda meh but decent enough
>poetry bundel is done yet to be published
>can paint and draw
>have a job and am self sufficient
>bodycount 17

>>15257906
you cucked most of the major names

>>15257668
Writing a Nature and Phys. Review paper

>>15260825
Pathetic

noone cares who you are anon stop replying. simple as that stfu

>>15257668
Nutted seven times a day for seven days in a row. My dick was red and raw by the second day. I have a lump on it that hasn't gone away in 2 years now...

>20 years old
>Still live with mum
>Went to uni for a year, dropped out
>No particular interest in anything
>All my money is in crypto
>Spend most days browsing 4chan or YouTube, or thinking in silence
Le man of inaction

>>15260797
I can look outside my window and see a beautiful oak tree. I can look at the news and see some poor transexual kid dying of aids.

Your attention is a gift you get to give.

people are not equal, so why should I feel bad that I can't come close to actual geniuses? At least I know my place.

>>15257906
Imagine the feeling

Man I don't even have any goals in life beyond basic self improvement, I'm pretty much genetic trash that grew out of a poor family of also retards, so it just hurts me to see successful people around me, especially in close proximity

My ressentiment flares up around them, and I imagine, imagine, imagine what could have been, were I just -not- myself. My idiot, subhuman, slave, self.

>>15257668
At 37 Chuck palahniuk published his first writing.

At 33 Cormac McCarthy wrote his first novel.

>>15257668
>Hegel finished his phenomenology at 37 years old. Before that he used to have major self-doubts.

Age is a spook. I'm in my mid twenties, became a MD and am now pursuing a master's degree in CS and a bachelor's degree in philosophy.

At age 19 I completed my first novel-length translation after three years of on-and-off work.

At 15, i reached a personal best of nutting 6 times in the same day

>>15257668
>At the age of 24 Neitzsche became the chair of Classical Philology at the University of Basel
He asked his student to ask for Lou-Andréas Salomé's hand for him, and went on and drowned his sorrow with whores and died of syphillis.

>At the age of 25 Goethe was already famous among literary circles and published his first novel
>"I like boys a lot, but the girls are even nicer. If I tire of her as a girl, she'll play the boy for me as well".

>At the age of 18 Pascal invented a calculator
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Jansenism

>At the age of 26 Schopenhauer began writing his magnum opus
>That seething incel

>>15263178
Nobody said they were not autistic. Doesn't change the fact that they did more than most of us.

>>15257668
Eh, I've self published two poetry chapbooks, and am slowly working on a series of novels I shall self-publish one day.
I've also succeeded in getting disowned by my family, which must be among my greatest achievments.
I'm 23 btw

>>15262630
Those are rookie numbers in this racket

at the age of 26 i took a shit so big it tore my anus

>>15263543
Once when I was 9 years old I didn't shit for a month, went to the hospital to get an enema, and when I finally did shit I lost 30+lbs (the nurse weighed me before and after).

>>15258435
>i'm in a great relationship
yeah sadly you have known her at a very early age
say goodbye to her in a few months/years(?

>>15258102
Anon what works of political theory should I read in Spanish?

>>15258800
nobody taught you how to fart yet you do it

>>15260891
At least you're honest.

>>15257668
>be me
>born in a third world country
the end

>>15257668
Why finish a work when you can dream it

>>15258591
Eat a dick

>>15257906
Great answer actually.

>>15261229
>that are on my website
you know they don't count if they're self-published, right?

>>15257668
Age 25

Neet living with parents and have a criminal record

>>15258591
You're pretty cute. I would suck your dick.

>>15257668
>nothing and frankly I don't care

>>15260797
What you value is incongruous with reality. You can never be contented. Filthy wretch, hopeless, and envious.

>>15265518
Giga based

>>15263620
that’s your horrible pessimism speaking. When you meet such an important person in your life, you will be infinitely fascinated by them and all that they do. If those feelings should fade, they will fade but to feel that they will inevitably fade is unhealthy imo. when you’re in those moments, there isn’t room for any other thought than their eyes, as you’re locked-in-step in dance
Please don’t bully me, and just agree with me loll

>>15259098
>read first sentence, already kek

good reply

>>15264287
El Continente de la Esperanza

El Foro de São Paulo contra Álvaro Uribe

La fauna política latinoamericana : neopopulistas reyes pasmados e insoportables

>>15257906

>>15257906

Nice.

>>15263587
Once, while in my cousin's house, I took a shit which completely clogged the toilet. There was no plunger in the bathroom and I was too embarrassed to let them know what had happened. So I owned it like a man and unclogged the toilet with my bare hands. I remember having to scrape off and pushing shit to get the bathroom unclogged.

>>15257906
Hey, good on you anon. I genuinely mean that.

>>15257705
*country's.
Hopefully the college is good enough to fix your grammar.

>>15266793
kek. I did the same thing in my cousin's place. There was shit underneath my fingernails.

I urinated all over the bleachers during gym class and got away with it.

>>15266275
Anon these all seem more like political history, not theory. They also don’t seem generalizable outside of Latin America. I’m not interested in Latin America specifically, just political theory more broadly, and was wondering if there’s anything written in Spanish that I should read

Are there any original works of pure theory in Spanish I should read?

>>15263587
You're probably a short article in a medical journal somewhere.

>>15257906
extremely based.

>>15267511
A lot of literature in Spanish is very latin-centric, and honestly I don't know of any pure theory in spanish specially because a lot of it comes mixed with historical aspects of thier itmes with communism and socialism.

>>15258147
>>15258125
>>15258102
Além de brasileiro, é mentiroso.

>>15267650
>Brasileiro
>mentiroso

É de se esperar.

>>15257668
Nothing, yet.

>>15257906
> For the fact is, man has been created for happiness, and he who is wholly happy has a perfect right to say to himself: I have performed God’s will on earth. All the righteous, all the saints, all the holy martyrs have been happy.

>>15257668
Spent the day fartin into my bed

>>15257668
I managed to have the pleasure of this conversation with you, waifu, which none of the great men you mentioned can claim.

That's what she actually wants to hear OP.

>>15257668
I'm pulling an Ozu

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yasujir%C5%8D_Ozu#Early_life
>In March 1921, Ozu graduated from the high school. He attempted the exam for entrance into what is now Kobe University's economics department, but failed. In 1922, he took the exam for a teacher training college, but failed it too.
>Ozu returned to Japan in February 1946, and moved back in with his mother, who had been staying with his sister in Noda in Chiba prefecture.
>Ozu was known for his drinking. He and Noda measured the progression of their scripts by how many bottles of sake they had drunk.
>Ozu remained single throughout his life.
>He lived with his mother until she died, less than two years before his own death.

>>15257668
18 law student,written several essays on race and criminality,best in my class ,going to write political literature in the future,lifter with muscular body and sportsman of boxe,weightlifting and jiu jitsu also beeing an archer training to compete in archery contests that good enough?

>>15258063
This gives me a vibe similar to the "I will live a good life at your expense" copypasta, in less transparent but also less funny.

Anyway, good job.

>>15258063
You're going to have to find peers who are smarter than you in some areas or better than you in some way in order to feel like a human being. The alternative is to spend the rest of your life playing with the toy people in their toy world and impressing them every time you breathe, allowing solipsistic narcissism to devour you from within. You have no idea how lonely you are because you're living within the intellectual equivalent of a single player game.

>>15267986
vapid narcissist

>>15258591
Will you sub me back? I only have 4 videos, but I want to be friends.

>>15268012
narcissist?he asked what i achieved its not wrong to be proud of your acomplishments,not everyone is born to be a fucking humble monk

>>15263487
Why whats your high score?

>>15261255
Holy fucking shit

>>15257906

>>15260778
>>15260891
>>15260778
>>15260891
>Today, I thought I was listening to porn through headphones but it was blasting through my speakers for an hour straight
there's always someone more pathetic than you, mon ami

>27
>Have a well paying corperate job as asoftware engineer
>Read, play multiple sports, socialize with friends in spare time
>Hot gf

I'm happy

>>15257668
>What have you accomplished so far?
180kg deadlift

>26
>two time college dropout
>have worked many entry level jobs
>currently at amazon
>have read a lot
>getting better at french, but still beginner
>starting to feel motivated to write more, have some ideas for short stories

I have accomplished absolutely nothing. I blow my money on dumb shit, and learning french is the most productive thing I do. Other than that, it's just reading and surfing the internet.

>>15257705
yet you're still a frogposter

>>15257939
based

>>15257668
Nothing. I'm a community college dropout, a fast food employee washout. I have failed at everything I ever tried at. Tried writing music, failed. Tried writing poetry, failed. Tried writing stories, failed. Tried playing an instrument, failed. Tried to do theater and apply to acting schools, failed. I have failed every interpersonal relationship I've ever had. I am a failure as a son. I am a failure as a brother. I am a failure as a friend. I am a failure as a boyfriend. I have nothing to be proud of in my life. I am a complete and utter failure. I plan on killing myself.

>>15258063
>solved a theorem

try again, but harder this time

>>15260797
You cannot cure the world if you act from a place of sickness.

>realized self as eternal essence of all that exists beyond the appearances of forms
>liberated from samsara
never returning to this faggot reality again ,cya later dualitycels

lecturer for my creative writing workshop sent the story i submitted to the editor of TinHouse that she knows. they rejected it for not fitting but i appreciated the recognition

shitposted on /lit/ for 6 years

>>15257906

>>15258591
Nice, q

>>15257686
Based

>>15257668
does it matter to accomplish anything at all in this existence?
you fight to improve a decaying stupid species that will make your life miserable for it and then will appropriate all your merit after you die

>>15257668
>What have you accomplished so far?
comparatively, nothing but at least ive had sex

its not my fault wellbutrin fucked me up

I have accomplished nothing because I still don't know what I like or what I want to do. My whole life up to now I've basically been waiting for something.

>>15257906
I am happy for you, anon

>>15267987
post that one anon

>>15258102
incredibly based

>>15270945
You’re halfway towards success :)) dont give up yet, suicide is not fun. Silly anons with future gfs to love, shouldn’t throw around that threat so carelessly

>>15258110
look up matched betting

>>15257906
whats the secret anon?

>>15257668
> allegedly died of speed overdose at 15
> never visually aged since
> stopped counting the years after turning 18
> keep hoarding knowledge and experience in a body halted in time
> utterly lacking empathy and emotion
> omw to become a devilish ephebe of wisdom

>>15273812
What?

>>15273834
i am eternally young, and profoundly schizophrenic.

> at the age of 18, i am with horses
> many of you city posters havent even touched a real horse
> these half-a-ton beasts like me and carry me fast across the fields
> monkey brain pushing the reward button non-stop because i have a bond, the fur is soft, and i'm going fast
> not in misery
i outsmarted the system