/lit/ - Literature

>>14685018
I'm going to write the well written equivalent lads what should I include?

>>14685018
Wow, really maeks you think...

>>14685022
zoomer culture

>>14685018
The audiobook is the best version of this, fyi. I don't know how Wil Wheaton pulled it off. The movie is fucking trash and the book is subpar, but that audiobook is sweet.

>>14685022
Something original.

>>14685018
Dante was a knight, married with children, a respected member of the ruling class and was even the top official in Florence for a short time.
You're probably thinking of another book.
Also your reliance on cheap superficial comparisons flag you as essentially a non-reader.

>>14685018
what the hell is this book even about anyway?

>>14686857
Typical coming of age + mary sue + EXTREME 80s nostalgia bombs. It is "fun" but fairly shallow for the most part.

>>14687108
yeah but whats the plot? does he get sucked into a video game or something and has to defeat some guy to get out?

>>14687287
Turned it off after watching about 10 mins of the movie, its about some fag who plays an MMO and tries to find the game devs fortune hidden in an easter egg within the game. It's one of the biggest expressions of commodity fetishism and bastardization that I've ever seen. Fucking disgusting how they tried to cram about as many PRODUCT cameos as they could in every fucking frame of the movie

>>14687353
so like the reddit verision of fight club kinda?

>>14686822
Am I supposed to feel attacked or exposed by your reply here? Lmao, if there's one thing I don't give a shit about is some pseud's opinions about my reading. KEK bet you were choking on a pipe while typing that thinking, "mmmm this fellow sure is a plebian let me put him in his place"

>>14686857
read some

>>14686857

>>14687436
This almost can't be real. How is this garbage so praised?

>>14687436
FUCK i wish i was NEET again and i could have free time like this.

>>14687456
The author knows his audience

>>14685475
What is zoomer culture

>>14687417
>tries hardest to make out like he's not seething
>clearly is

>>14687436
ywn be this based

>>14687517
donating to twitch thots, getting stupid af trendy haircuts, getting tattoos everywhere that they'll regret and get painfully removed in 10 years, doing Fortnite dances in public

>>14687517
battle royale games (fortnite)
Emo zoomer rappers (lil peep, drain gang, yung lean)
Marvel films
anime
just generally shit that was popular in the late 2010s

>>14687436
>when it came to research, i never took any shortcuts. over the past five years, i'd worked my way down the entire recommended /lit/ reading list. Homer, Pindar, Plato, Aristotle, Sophocles, Euripides, Hesiod, Aristophanes, Herodotus, Arrian, Thucydides, Sappho, Plutarch, Ovid, Virgil, Lucretius, Arisoto, Horace, St. Augustine, Marcus Aurelius, Rabelais, Dante, Petrarch, Tasso, Bruno, Boccaccio, Leopardi, Machiavelli, Luther, Cervantes, Chaucer, the Beowulf poet, Chretien de Troyes, Marie de France, Sterne, Burton, Browne, Spencer, Wyatt, Sidney, Percy Shelley, Tennyson, Donne, Pope, Dryden, Bacon, Novalis, Schelling, Schlegel, Hegel, Schopenhauer, Pascal, Lichtenberg, Dickinson, Shakespeare, Ibsen, Strindberg, Dickens, Marlowe, Diderot, Jonson, Goethe, Bunyan, Gibbon, Addison, Smollett, Milton, Johnson, Boswell, Emerson, Quincey, Burke, Spinoza, Leibniz, Hume, Kant, Mary Shelley, Wollstonecraft, Racine, Baudelaire, Valery, Rimbaud, Verlaine, Moliere, Montaigne, Browning, Gray, Holderlin, Schiller, Shaw, Voltaire, Hugo, Balzac, Zola, Colette, Duras, Dumas, Stendhal, Nerval, Flaubert, Mallarme, Malraux, Chateaubriand, Artaud, Poe, Wordsworth, Coleridge, Blake, Byron, Keats, Arnold, Pater, Walter Scott, Swinburne, Rossetti, Carroll, William James, Henry James, Hawthorne, Twain, Melville, Dewey, Bergson, Whitehead, George Eliot, Williams, Frost, Cummings, Crane, Stevens, Whitman, Plath, Trakl, Rilke, Celan, Montale, Neruda, Lorca, Tagore, Manzoni, Peake, Murdoch, Wharton, Wilde, Faulkner, O'Connor, Passos, Nietzsche, Marx, Adorno, Bloch, Lukacs, Bakhtin, Hamsun, Pushkin, Gogol, Tolstoy, Turgenev, Chekhov, Andreyev, Bely, Bulgakov, Gonchorov, Camoes, Pessoa, Queiroz, Saramago, Paz, Borges, Bloy, Pirandello, Huysmans, Lautreamont, Schwob, Casares, Bolano, Cortazar, Lima, Donoso, de Assis, Carpentjier, Celine, Marquez, Unamuno, Gracq, Gide, Jarry, Camus, Conrad, Wells, Hardy, Salinger, Anderson, Lawrence, Forster, Hrabal, Swift, Bronte, Woolf, Bachelard, Roussel, Beckett, Proust, Nabokov, Joyce, O'Brien, Yeats, Waugh, Heaney, Pinter, Auden, Hofmannsthal, Mann, Musil, Broch, Zweig, Bachmann, Jelinek, Lessing, Laxness, Simenon,Svevo, Levi, Buzzati, Quasimodo, Moravia, Llosa, Walser, Kafka, Babel, Schulz, Transtromer, Kertesz, Pavic, Andric, Grossmann, Linna, Mahfouz, Boll, Grass, Canetti, Pavese, Robbe-Grillet, Blanchot, Perec, Queneau, Calvino, Bernhard, Gass, Barth, Gaddis, Vollmann, Vidal, Hawkes, DeLillo, Pynchon, McCarthy, McElroy, Soseki, Murasaki, Shonagon, Kawabata, Mishima, Akutagawa, Tanizaki, Dazai, Oe, Xingjian, Yan, Kosztolanyi, Gombrowicz, Ishiguro, Eco, Coetzee, Auerbach, Benjamin, Barthes, Pasternak, Derrida, de Man, Kristeva, Deleuze, Bateson, Foucault, Lyotard, Mcluhan, Eichenbaum, Steiner, Munro, Carson, Handke, Arno Schmidt, Theroux, Patrick White, Alfau, Marias, Enard, Claude Simon, Elizabeth Bishop, Markson, Lowry, Bellow, Dara

>>14687542
>Marvel films
i don't know of any zoomers who lie that shit, it seems to be mostly 30 year old soiboi types who watch that and literal 10 year olds, but not really zoomers

>>14687287
>>14687393
The world's society lives mostly in a VR realm. They even go to school in it. It is also like an RPG game at the same time. The creator made an Easter egg that allows who ever finds it to become the owner and a rich billion/trillionare. An evil corp is trying to find it first. Years later, no one has even found the first clue until the MC comes along. Don't read the book, don't watch the movie, just listen to the audiobook,

http://audiobookbay.nl/audio-books/ready-player-one-ernest-cline-4/

>>14687353
The movie is shit and doesn't capture the essence of the book in anyway.

>>14685022
Make everyone you dislike an NPC who gets pwned by you and your Virgil. Master Chief or a Woody Allen-ized Ernest Hemingway would work well for the role.

I've noticed that there don't seem to be any porno movies

that are made for guys like me.

All the porn I've come across

was targeted at beer-swilling sports bar dwelling alpha-males

Men who like their women stupid and submissive

Men who can only get it up for monosyllabic cock-hungry nymphos

with gargantuan breasts and a three-word vocabulary

Adult films are populated with these collagen-injected

liposuctioned women

Many of whom have resorted to surgery and self-mutilation

in an attempt to look the way they have been told to look.

These aren't real women. They're objects.

And these movies aren't erotic. They're pathetic.

These vacuum-headed fuck bunnies don't turn me on.

They disgust me.

And it's not that I'm against pornography.

I mean, I'm a guy. And guys need porn.

Fact.

"Like a preacher needs pain, like a needle needs a vein,"

Guys need porn.

But I don't wanna watch this misogynist he-man woman-hater porn.

I want porno movies that are made with guys like me in mind:

Guys who know that the sexiest thing in the world

is a woman who is smarter than you are.

You can have the whole cheerleading squad,

I want the girl in the tweed skirt and the horn-rimmed glasses:

Betty Finnebowski, the valedictorian.

Oh yes.

First I want to copy her Trig homework,

and then I want to make mad, passionate love to her

for hours and hours

until she reluctantly asks if we can stop

because she doesn't want to miss Battlestar Galactica.

Summa cum laude, baby!

That is what I call erotic.

But do you ever see that kind of a woman in a contemporary adult film?

No.

Which is why I'm going to start writing and directing Geek Porno.

I shall be the quintessential Nerd Porn Auteur.

And the women in my porno movies will be the kind

that drive nerds like me mad with desire.

I'm talking about the girls that used to fuck up the grading curve.

The girls in the Latin Club and the National Honor Society.

Chicks with weird clothes, braces, four eyes, and 4.0 GPAs.

Brainy articulate bookworms, with MENSA cards in their purses

and chips on their shoulders.

My porn starlets will come in all shapes and sizes.

My porn starlets will be too busy working on their PhD to go to the gym.

In my kind of porno movies the girls wouldn't even have to get naked.

They'd just take the guys down to the rec room and

beat them repeatedly at chess

and then talk to them for hours about Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle

or the underlying social metaphors in the Aliens movies.

Buy stock in some hand cream companies

because there is about to be a major shortage.

And I'm not just talking about straight porn. Oh no.

There should be fuck films for my nerd brethren

of all sexual orientations.

Gay nerd porn flicks with titles like "Dungeons and Drag-queens."

This idea is a fucking gold mine.

I am gonna make millions,

because this country is full of database programmers

and electronics engineers

and they aren't getting the loving they so desperately need.

And you can help . . .

If you're an intelligent woman is interested in breaking into the adult film industry,

and if you can tell me the name of Luke Skywalker's home planet,

then you are hired.

It doesn't matter if you think you're overweight or unattractive.

It doesn't matter if you don't think you're beautiful.

You are beautiful. . .

And I will make you a star.

>>14687540
What the fuck is a fortnite dance?

>>14687550
10 year olds are younger zoomers, no for older zoomers.

>>14688227
JUST

>>14685022

The pleasure that the anus offers.

>>14687436
Imagine eating that much garbage

>>14687546
Saved.