/lit/ - Literature

>>14451662
And we gon' bring back reeeal rap, NIGGA!

>>14451662
Sounds like a plan.

Post an excerpt from your poem, epicanon

>>14451662
We need to bring her back

>>14451696
She's blood, flesh and bones
No tucks or silicone
She's touch smell sight taste and sound
But somehow I can't believe that anything should happen
I know we're right where I belong and nothing's gonna happen, yeah
Cause she's so high
High above me, she's so lovely
She's so high
Like Cleopatra, Joan of Arc, or Aphrodite
She's so high
High above me
First class, fancy free, she's high society
She's got the best of everything
Why could a guy like me ever really offer?
She's perfect as she can be, why should I even bother, ah ha
Cause she's so high
High above me, she's so lovely
She's so high
Like Cleopatra, Joan of Arc, or Aphrodite

>>14451719
>SoC in a fucking poem

>>14451662
I gotchu bro

>>14451719

>>14451696
>tfw I wrote several long narrative poems in 2019

I'm hesitant to post them here on /lit/ because I still hope to get them published. Somehow.

>>14451731
Post a smaller poem that your not afraid to not publish so we can judge you

>>14451731
post it an excerpt as a screencap
that way it's not searchable

>>14451765
The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You're barely waking
And I'm tangled up in you
Yeah
I'm open, you're closed
Where I follow, you'll go
I worry I won't see your face
Light up again
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide

>>14451719
>>14451770
>this fucked up meter

Looks like Rupi Kaur is posting in this thread, lads.

>>14451770
You retard

>>14451770

>>14451776
>>14451778
I miss the sound of your voice
And I miss the rush of your skin
And I miss the still of the silence
As you breathe out and I breathe in
If I could walk on water
If I could tell you what's next
I'd make you believe
I'd make you forget
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love
I miss the sound of your voice
Loudest thing in my head
And I ache to remember
All the violent, sweet
Perfect words that you said
If I could walk on water
If I could tell you what's next
I'd make you believe
I'd make you forge

Cmon now /lit/, I know you've got better poets then these mere free versers

>>14451662
>Are you with me, /lit/?
No, the past has past. Today can never be yesterday.

>>14451827
But tomorrow can be like yesterday.
I know this because i have a job.

What ever happened to the anon that was writing the epic about the war in Afghanistan or something like that

>>14451853
Based, I'm not even going to bother with a comeback. You win.

>>14451765
This >>14451770 isn't me. The screenshot's not a bad idea. Here you go. This poem's written in a kind of unrhymed couplet, with the first line having fourteen syllables and the second line having thirteen syllables. It was an unusual meter and it took a while to get the hang of, but I wanted to do it because the "swaying" of the couplet, the alternation between line lengths, was something I thought would call to mind the swaying of flowers in the Spring breeze. This poem takes place in springtime, and flowers play an important part in the plot.

>>14451722
>>14451728
>>14451776
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ElORM9O-0U
you guys are fucking retarded

>>14451899
Weird syntax at some points but I like it

>>14451662
I’m in

>>14451899
Pretty good. I feel it loses some of its rythym there in the middle, but you do a pretty good job of getting the effect you were describing, and when you nail it the overall rythym is really good.

>>14451899
Not bad, anon.

>>14451662
>We're going to bring back the epic in the 2020s
already happened in 2019

C...can I share some poetry with you too, anon-kun?

poets should not be allowd to exist, virgins

>>14451703
BASED

>>14451770
Ugh, god damn it

I wish I were that optimistic

bump

>>14453325
This is real talent, anon.
Probably the best thing I've ever read in this damned board.

>>14453325
I like it a lot.

>>14453684
Just give it a go, you mind find its easier than you think.

>>14453325
A little awkward, but nevertheless a valiant effort, anon.

>>14451703
Based Fem NEET poster

>>14453325
Pretty based anon

Fuck it. Here is some shit I wrote. Only been writing for nearly a year and would like advice if you can offer it.

Brother, we sparred in the streets when our eyes first met,
I, a warrior king who has seen in the Deep,
You, nothing but a savage defying my tyranny;
Now the Deluge returns from the tears that I weep.

I had dreams that foretold your arrival that day
From a land where gazelles graze in summer season;
Found by a harlot who laid your head down
In her soothing embrace and imbued human reason.

Far in forests of cedar, we smote the ogre;
When the bull had come down from the heavens above,
You took hold of its horns and I butchered the beast,
But my ax could not rescue the brother I love

From the underworld's grasp to which mortals succumb.
You are buried with riches befitting a king
And adorned with obsidian, cornelian, and gold;
May the gods be your guide for the blessings you bring.

I am but the same flesh that's entombed on this day;
I take leave of my kingdom and travel by the sea
To consult the old sage who survived the great flood.
He will teach me the secret of immortality

>>14451722
>>14451728
>>14451776
>behold retarded zoomerdom incapable of using google

>>14451827
>past has past
The past has past what?

I'll post an excerpt from an epic (as in long) poem I'm writing. It's not complex, or super deep or anything;

So Jacob ventured through the woods to find the lilac fox,
to ask of it - if it so gave - the way to Audr's home.
He took the trail until its end, and then kept treading on.
The forest grew much denser now; the trees grew mighty tall.
Their ancient trunks rose from the ground, their crowns embraced the sky.
From all around him he could hear the forest sing its tune.
It was at once familiar, at once completely new.

For days he hunted for the stream of which the old man spoke,
and while he did find many brooks, none matched what he'd been told.
He sat dejected on a rock when he heard distant shouts.

"Get off! Get off!"

A man in robes came bolting through the trees.
He ran with ease and skipped past branches, stones, and mossy roots,
his ashen robes and scruffy beard just barely keeping up.
He stopped and panted next to Jacob, then he took to words.

"What do you think you're doing here? You'll ruin everything!"

"I'm sorry" Jacob said "but please, pray tell who may you be?"

"So stupid, stupid, stupid, you destroyer of my plans.
Around you stands my life's long work, a masterpiece, I'll add."

>>14451662
What if we kidnap Rupi and only feed her Curry and other indian food. Then, we keep her in a small room where she spends all day farting and shitting. Would this fix poetry?

>>14451662
We are, but nobody who posts on this board regularly is going to be.

>>14453325
>4 syllables
>4 syllables
>4 syllables
>5 syllables
ruins the entire thing

>>14455383
>syllables

>>14455397
what

>>14451662
I’m working on publishing a poetry collection with this exact goal in mind. It’s all allegorical but hardcore redpilled stuff that’ll get past the censors (liberal publishers). I’ll post some if anyone wants.

>>14453325
this is damn good.

"Eight Pee-M"

Javad plays in the yard;
skip, skip, turn skip.
Everyone cheers for our bard.
Saying; you go Javad,
You're our hero Javad!"

Javad get's tired and falls.
The white chalk is all red.
Javad is asleep in bed.

>>14455527
I re-name it *"Eight Pea 'M'"

>>14454218
>>14454584
>>14454938
>>14454951
>>14455424
aww anons glad you liked my poetry, I love you all too <3
I really hope to become a writer some day, words truly are magical. Thanks for the (You)'s :3

>>14455383
Are you referring to the -ity lines? The very last one is kindof a play on the modernist drive for "creativity" just being a bad re-hashing of the past (among other things), hence why it's not in keeping with the others. Though if it makes you feel better, they *all* keep the (mostly-iambic) pentameter with the preceding line.

O' tranny O' beast of fate
I tell thee to seethe, cope & dilate
You will never be a real woman
Was getting caught part of your plan?

Thy deviance madness-borne
It is society you have torn!
Filthy creature without faith nor passion
Be purged in the fires of Abaddon!

>>14451662
Prediction: All great future authors will have browsed /lit/

>Poetry
>English
Stop trying to make this happen.

>>14455708
Is it really worth sacrificing the momentum of what could be a great poem for a play on words?

>>14455763
Well, thematically it's what I was trying to build up to, eurhythmy is nice, but it's ultimately a tool, not the final end.
I can see why you don't like the break in structure, but imo it's the perfect way to end on a slightly jarring note. It gives definition to everything before it. And if I may suggest— the fact that you're upset means that the poem has seeped its way into your brain, as intended ;)

>>14455804
I wouldn't say i'm "upset" over it, your poem is still good and I get your point. Are you influenced by Bataille?

I eat my poopoo and I drink my piss.
I'll try my cum next. Hmm? What's this?
It tastes quite bad, it tastes quite crude.
I'll stick to poopoo for my food.

>>14455874
Haven't read him, actually, will add to my ever-growing list. I'm woefully unread in poetry, the closest influence I can claim in that area would be Tolkien. Dostoevsky and Donna Tartt are always in the back of head, too. Nietzsche, perhaps, in the sense of liking The Birth of Tragedy and hating with a passion pretty much everything else he stood for. Uni leaves me with tragically little time for reading/writing, alas.

>>14455914
sublime

le bump
de rump

>>14451899
"languid air" should better be "limpid air"

>>14451899
camping in this forest to which they'd recently come -> camping in this forest where they'd recently arrived

Yeah as other anons said the rhythm is quite good except at some points it isn't, which occurs because of English's natural stresses not lining up aesthetically in the ear: "Having grown up...of the book" is an example of suboptimal meter. Also if this is supposed to be telling a story or something there is a lot of fluff. There's a total of 6 lines that all say the same exact piece of info: she is reading a book.

>>14455708
>hence
Pseud

I’m currently planning an epic poem describing the war in the north against Sauron. Central figure is Dáin, but the Elves of Mirkwood and men of Dale are in it too. Style is heroic couplets, may post the first stanzas soon

>>14457154
>heroic couplet
Is that 2 muscle men banging?

>>14457162
doesn't have to be

>>14455759
Unironically this.

>>14451719
>She's touch smell sight taste and sound
this sticks to the mind somehow

Well, then, we need not seek for the Heav'nly Powers:
It are a token, what sallies out of them,
Not of love, but of love's delight.
As the first Tea-Kettles go out:
It changes the Seas of Hell, and makes the Ocean
Shine with like Eye. They say "all will be well!"
Or "more will be done," even if the Admirable Powers
Can but keep from overstepping the Boundaries.
As the Star puts into night-time, as the Night with Eyes
Upwards; so also when these Powers with Hat of Sparkling Stars
Become handmaids to their Discreet Highness.

A furious mask grab
A men of depravity
Knee drag, neck slap
Duck & dive, dive & duck!


God put a divinity in the world
He made thee a spark so special
He put you on the chain gang
Put you to the test
And left you to grow
God in you
So confused and blind

These are lyrics to a folk-punk song I'm making. Any criticism is helpful!

What happened that time, some a high school boyfriend fucked her?
What happened that time, she said fuck me and said fuck me
When I was young we must have laughed and shit, told a lot of lies, didn't grow up
But at times there's nothing you can do
You can't fucking get away with shit, that's the truth
She's still with him, still fucking him, let it go but I can't
She, &c., &c.

>>14451662
Poetry is the only form of writing that is short enough for zoomers' attention spans. This thread is evidence that we can resurrect it by simply copy/pasting old 90s lyrics as our free reddit poetry, in hopes of sparking their creative minds to write their own shit.

If moths had eyes, would they be happier?
How do they know they are not dead
Cavemen hunting for food, but not before they style the hair on their head
What would last longer in dinosaur times?
A blind man wouldn't stand a chance
Not with all them rocks about
I'd rather be a blind moth

>>14451719
She's touch smell sight taste and sound is a cool line

Every thing else is whatever. The idea is one that's not going win you friends

>>14455400
>English poetic meter is recorded by amount of syllables
Read more

>>14457962
>is recorded

>>14457992
I genuinely can't even remember what I meant to type there. I'm ill and retarded.

>>14451662
idk OP...

I'm liking the direction this guy is taking Rap in...Maybe try not being born in le wrong generation?

>>14457453
>Put you to the test
>And left you to grow

With the resurgence of right-wing traditionalism, I'm inclined to agree with OP. We'll get another Kipling who, as Borges said, could have written a true epic if he hadn't written children's stories.

>>14458422
>Kipling
Kipling was trash honestly.

Master the haiku
The epic will come after
Easily, stepwise

>>14451662
art reflects life
if life is ugly, how can art be beautiful?

Fuck off butterfly
Your sentiment is vapid
Form nonexistent

>>14451662
I know literally nothing about poetry. How do I learn rhyme schemes, meter, syllable counts, etc?

>>14451662
Poetry hasn't been good since bicameralism went out of style.
Imagine instead of hopelessly waiting for your muse to speak to you through your pen, you literally had the voice of God commanding your writing. We never stood a chance in recreating the classic epics.

>>14458518
filthy pessimist, go back to planing how to kill yourself you degenerate trany

>>14458561
Poetic Meter and Form by Octavia Wynne looks to be good but unfortunately I can't find an ebook download anywhere

>>14458583
You're referring to Jaynes? I've never heard this mentioned with regard to poetry

>>14458614
Yes. Reading his theory brought back memories of creative writing classes where we were encouraged to be less self regulated or filtered, to not get in the way of our own speech. The bicameral man is the epitome of all that.

>>14451662
FUCK YEAH
IM WITHJEW MAYT

>>14451662
Lets do it

Niggas iffy
Uh
Blicky got the siffy
uh

>>14458839
The bicameral man is the epitome of a creative writing class? Lmao sounds great.

>>14451796
poetry was the shitposts we made along the way

>>14451899
neat first part
i like it because of the rusted parts of robots that could be seen
reminds me of Dresden Codak
not so much a fan of the last part though
it reads more like random terry brooks ya fantasy mary sue #98675595 but what do i know
i also feel like she shouldn't be named

>>14454965
so, Gilgamesh was gay all along?

>>14455250
>all_the _eggs.jpg

>>14455408
no thanks

>>14451719

Go on... FINISH

>>14455748
nice

>>14458439
this

>>14458518
>what are drugs