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/lit/ - Literature

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14363925 No.14363925 [Reply] [Original]

the first cumshot landed squarely on David Foster Wallace's bandana. He roared with indignation and seized forward to face his enemy, eyes blazing with New Sincerity. Harold Bloom stood smirking across the room, turkey gobbler waggling ever so slightly with satisfied amusement. The renowned fantasy author gripped his almost non-existent penis, and with a lightning quick yank sent another gob of spunk invigorated by the wisdom of the classics towards the younger writer. This time Wallace was prepared; he ducked, and placed his hand on his own shaft for a returning volley, but found himself insufficiently aroused. He quickly leafed through his mental arsenal for spank material and conjured the memory of himself hurling a chair at his ex-wife. With a now stiff dick, he launched a load of his own towards the fat man, who was caught off guard-
Pynchon stood up from his typewriter and retired for the night.

>> No.14363932

Stop masturbating, stop watching porn, control your lust before it erodes what little is left of your brain.

>> No.14363946

>>14363925
Based
>>14363932
Cringe

>> No.14363965
File: 2 KB, 148x74, OP cringing cringe CRINGE.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14363965

>>14363946
The real cringe is cringing with your own cringe, so cringe.

>> No.14363982
File: 190 KB, 1080x1920, Screenshot_20191216-215348.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14363982

>>14363965
Fail...

>> No.14363989

>>14363982
my post was the third, so the real fail here is you.

>> No.14363991

>>14363932
Based.
>>14363946
You're going to hell. You are beyond the possibility of redemption. Not even the Buddha, Jesus, or any number of prophets would ever forgive you. Put your dick down and stop masturbating. Free yourself from the tyranny of the flesh. Ascend by embracing the volcel way.

>> No.14363997
File: 123 KB, 1881x591, 2019-12-16 (3).png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14363997

>>14363965
idiot

>> No.14364042

>>14363997
Hey idiot, >>14363989

>> No.14364309

both sides are idiots

>> No.14364412
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14364412

>>14364309
Enlightened centrist

>> No.14364436
File: 716 KB, 4688x4688, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14364436

>>14364412
>complimenting poster
>posting shiggyman

>> No.14364441

>>14364309
i've decided that this issue is at least as important as all the other inane shit people overly concern themselves with and that i will make this the hill i'll die on, i will be marching on the capital tomorrow at 0600 sharp with my local militia and we are going to demand at gunpoint formal recognition of the anon who posted >>14363925 as "based" by the federal government of the united states of america, you are all welcome to join me and i am hoping that this will be the incident that kicks over world war iii between basedposters and cringeposters and also that this brings out the apocalypse so god will finally end our suffering in this absolutely meaningless spiritual wasteland that is modern reality
anyway yeah 0600 sharp be there or be square (that means cringe in hippie parlance)