/lit/ - Literature

>>14347189
i know this feel quite well

>>14347189
read blanchard
t. /lgbt/

Basic response, but why not *The Metamorphosis*. Its a story about dysphoria in a way

>>14347189
orlando

>>14347189
>>14347197
same
all the sex i would do if i could be a lesbian girl omg

Stop watching porn ten hours a day you brainfried retards

>>14347189
https://scholar.google.com/scholar?hl=en&as_sdt=0%2C5&q=%22Male+lesbianism%22&btnG=

it's a phenomenon that's mentioned in women's studies courses

https://nplusonemag.com/issue-30/essays/on-liking-women/

>>14347284
Will I stop being a fag if I stop watching porn??

>>14347329
Unironically Yes. your not gay if you want to be a lesbian, you probably just don’t feel very masculine because you aren’t. Don’t worry about no-fapping but seriously reduce your porn consumption

>>14347189
I am a futa trapped in a man's body. I want a woman's shape but the penis stays.

>>14347329
Yes, also stop masturbating

>>14347329
Yes

>>14347329
how do you feel when you watch ffm threesome porn?

>>14347189
lesbian strapon porn is the best porn category

>>14347189
Stop masturbating and work out, stop consuming tranny propaganda. It will solve this issue. These intrusive thoughts are external to you.

I'm kind of similar in that I have erection problems when I try to have penetration but I'm still horny and would love to have lesbian style sex without penetration. But as a man even bi-women seem to require good dicking from man in order to see him as good sex partner. Are there women who like men but aren't obsessed with penetration?

>>14347189
Ok tranny

>>14347189
the scientific term is autogynephilia

>>14347189
You aren't a woman who likes women trapped in a man's body. You're a low-value male who has noticed how much better society treats even low-value women, and you think your life as a whole would be better if you were a woman. Getting sex much easier is just the biggest outward sign of all the other things society makes easier for women. It's also easy to fantasize about.

If you chase this "I'm a woman" thing, you'll become a discord tranny. Bitter. Dumb. No hope of becoming that which you dream about. No increase in sex. You won't become a woman, you'll become a sexual Frankenstein. Those who know you will be repulsed so you'll label them toxic and adopt increasingly convoluted politics to justify the decisions you've already made, and the doubling down necessary to preserve ego.

If you just repress these feelings, you'll become an incel. Incels and trannies are made of exactly the same stresses and pressures, they just act on them differently.

The only ways out of your situation are either to improve yourself so greatly women want you as a man, or to accept it'll never happen. Improvement is unlikely, as you can't train to be taller or study to have more masculine facial features. If you were already hot you wouldn't be navel gazing on /lit/. You'd be guys deep in a Stacy and "I wish I was a girl" wouldn't even be on your radar.

Your next best move is to accept that you will never have the fantasy. Acceptance is the opposite of denial. Once you've accepted you'll never be Chad Thundercock, or possibly that there will never be a woman who cares about you, for you, it will get better.

I've abandoned sex and devoted my life to writing. I'll never publish anything, but it keeps me from turning into a discord tranny or Elliot Roger.

One of the key strengths of this position is that when you want nothing, you're harder to manipulate. The snake-oil salesman promising pussy if you buy his products or accept his ideology goes from a serious consideration, to a pointless sideshow. When you opt out, you're also refusing to support the social systems that isolated you to begin with. Your whole life changes. No longer do you work to produce money for the lure of social status you can never attain. You work to produce something you value more. Solitude goes from evidence you're defective or doing something wrong, to exactly what you want.

>>14347689
this (depression/dysmorphia, tranny propaganda, ressentiments, 'toxic' masculinity) + porn addiction

>>14347689
The first half of your post is solid, anon. The second half, though, hints quite strongly at the repression you detest so much in the first half.

>>14347701
It's more that my stressors have shifted. I am mentally and physically ill. I will probably not live much longer. I have no idea if I will be able to flesh out anything worth sharing with any degree of talent before I die. If I fail at that, then when I die, all of me will die and not a single person will remember me 100 years from now.

I'm not sure I'll ever even have the status of an absolute crackpot. At least the crackpot will have a small following forever. Even if just among people who go looking to read odd old writers for entertainment.

My main idea which may be new may also be an actual manic delusion.

>>14348130
You are loved and appreciated anon. Good luck to you.

>>14347189
I hope not. I’m tired of living in a world where people believe stuff like this. And I can promise you I’m not going to take it much longer.

>>14347689
Personally, while I do feel like a lesbian in a man’s body, I don’t feel like a tranny. I relate to women more than men and I can control my sexual urges as though they have an on/off switch in a way similar to many women. It has nothing to do with being a comically stereotypical woman like a lot of trannies do, but rather the fact that my mentality is more feminine. I’m wondering if I maybe have a female brain? Would that explain why I seem to be a somewhat feminine male?

>>14347646
Maybe. Humans are a bit more nuanced and complicated than labels, though. Else you make the erroneous connection between a wavelength and a color.

>>14347689
>as you can't train to be taller or study to have more masculine facial features.
This is actually a lie.
Posture (and tongue position) affect jawline similar to how braces affect teeth.

>>14347189
No. As much as I'd love to replace all masculine and ugly bodies with those of sexy women, I don't feel like a lesbian. Lesbians are into freaky shit, just like women.
I think the only thing I agree with lesbians is the pleasure I get from their bodies and general femininity.

>I want something, so my whole identity should be centered around it
This is absolutely retarded, and presumably a consumerist machination. All of my ideals are unrealizable in the physical realm, beyond the dreams and fantasies I have.
Trying to absurdly claw towards them with limited resources or crying how it isn't so are both futile.

Let's say somebody is way too fixated with Sonic and all their sexual fantasies are between those types - should they take surgery, therapy, acting classes etc. to look and behave more like Sonic? I think not.

>>14347298
This was great, thank you

Holy fuck this is disturbing. You people are gone

>>14347189
my diary desu
i got over it

this is why porn should be banned.

>b-but muh wanking!!
yeah sorry bro all sorts of visual pornography at one's fingertips hurts too many people. you can just wank with your imagination.

>>14347189
Ask Butterfly...

Yes, The Late Breakfasters by Robert Aickman explores this theme

The duality of gender is part of the material delusion, the spirit is genderless; it's both and neither. A soul developing spiritually will get closer to realizing that, as part of realizing how all of the material world of duality is a delusion; and since the soul molds the body to its needs, it manifests the body as more androgynous, closer to what it really is. Confusion and frustration arise naturally since our materialistic society has no concept of these things, so people are left to their own devices; the entire confusion of gender and sexuality is a result of that. Since society fails to inform and they fail to inform themselves, instead of developing further they plunge headlong into the worst of degeneracy and sink lower instead of rising. The stakes get higher and the more you develop the more risky it is; with awareness of good comes awareness of evil, greater potential for virtue equals greater potential for sin. Ignorance is not an excuse in the grand scheme, since the entire game is about gaining knowledge and overcoming ignorance through virtue and not being arrogant or lazy (the source of ignorance). The material world itself comes from ignorance and delusion. Listen to >>14347689 but go further, devote yourself to God and become a brahmachari.

>>14348648
good post

>>14347189
Sonichu

>>14347689
>If you were already hot you wouldn't be navel gazing on /lit/
false. i've blown off a good number of girls; im just looking for someone i want to spend my life with, not just some dumb cunt to fuck, and /lit/ is a better version of /pol/ at this point.

t. albania thundercock

>>14349425
>albanian chad
oxymoron

>>14349436
>6'2
>white
>blonde
>semi-athletic build
>good brow ridge
>good jaw line
>symmetrical face
>high t neanderthal features

>>14349473
and no proof was seen

>>14349485

>>14349491

Be gone shiptar dog

>>14349498

>>14347329
gay people is literally not real
show me man who wont fuck 10/10 girl and i pay you

>>14349503
>we wuz illyrianz n sheeit

>>14349506
we were

>>14349503

You are a dumb muslim nigger. You are the dumbest, muslimest nigger I have ever seen.

>>14349508
So were a bunch of other smelly balkanlars, which is why most of you still have darker phenotypes today compared to other Europeans. Why do you guys cling to it though?

>>14349520
XD dude

>>14349523
>so were a bunch of other balkan people
yes, but we are more illyrian than them, as they have a lot of slavic admixture.

>which is why most of you still have darker phenotypes today
if you go to northern albania and into more rural kosova, there are tons of pale blonde people, just like me

>Why do you guys cling to it though?
because illyrians are chad and conquer northerner wahmen. my maternal side is german and polish for instance.

>>14349558
You sound like you're LARPing, dude.

>yes, but we are more illyrian than them, as they have a lot of slavic admixture.
Most Balkanlars have very little Slavic admixture. They got the language from them, but it was small tribes of Slavs that conquered large numbers of "superior" Illyrians, lol.

>if you go to northern albania and into more rural kosova, there are tons of pale blonde people, just like me
>because illyrians are chad and conquer northerner wahmen. my maternal side is german and polish for instance.
Like I said above, it's the opposite. Illyrians and other Balkanlars got conquered by Slavs, Turks, etc. and had religions and languages imposed on them. Your genetics have remained mostly unchanged, but you've been conquered by everyone under the sun. Vassals of Ottomans, Germans, Russians, Americans, etc. It doesn't matter. You're not conquering anyone, quite the opposite actually.

>>14347189
Sonichu

>>14349589
>Most Balkanlars have very little Slavic admixture. They got the language from them, but it was small tribes of Slavs that conquered large numbers of "superior" Illyrians, lol.
wrong. see image; outside of south serbs, most of the west balkan slavs are about 50-50

>Illyrians and other Balkanlars got conquered by Slavs
obviously not albanians, who are the core illyrians

>Turks
we converted to islam so we wouldn't get invaded by a gigantic empire that had tons of subjects to draw upon. we ended up winning in that exchange, considering that we got to rule over greek and serbian christians and colonize their wombs, lmao.

>Russians
Hoxha would like to have a word with you

>Germans
were our allies

>Americans
everyone is having that issue right now

>>14349614
>wrong. see image; outside of south serbs, most of the west balkan slavs are about 50-50
You're all pretty close, it's just minor nationalist bickering.

>obviously not albanians, who are the core illyrians
The Illyrian movement was started by Croats, lmao. Anyway, the whole we wuz thing, regardless of who does it, is just fanfiction.

>we converted to islam so we wouldn't get invaded by a gigantic empire that had tons of subjects to draw upon
Is that supposed to be a positive? You're vassals of America or the EU today, same as the other Balkan states.

>Russians, Germans
I was referring to the fact that all Balkan states are vassals of one country or another at any point in time.

>everyone is having that issue right now
Here you go. Only way to prevent foreign powers from meddling with you.

Confederacy of dunces

>>14349649
>You're all pretty close, it's just minor nationalist bickering.
i actually tend to agree with this

>The Illyrian movement was started by Croats
that doesn't change that they are about half slavic, except dalmatian and maybe bosnian croats.

>You're vassals of America or the EU today
ok? so are you, and everyone that isn't iran, north korea, china, or russia.

>>14349693
I'm American though.

>>14349704
and your taxes go to israel, goy

>>14349708
>implying we don't control Israel for our ends
>he fell for the Jew meme

>>14349719
>implying we don't control Israel for our ends
yeah man, the look of a victor

btw, america is a massive shithole. ugly country with ugly fat people.

>>14349738
Then why do so many South and Eastern Euros move here?

>>14349748
to use your state resources (or in other words, your tax money), which is what im doing as we speak lmao. thanks for paying for my university.

>>14349766
You're welcome. With money we can buy everyone and everything. You can't escape our reach.

>>14349806
>our reach.
you live surrounded by niggers, so you aren't winning. also, iran is soon going to topple your empire of dirt.

https://www.nytimes.com/2002/09/06/opinion/how-we-won-the-war.html

>>14349818
Cope. Everyone is our bitch, including China. Look behind the smoke and mirrors.

>>14349821
cringe. only an american could be so dumb to think this.

>>14347189
I mean most lesbos just wish they were men, so congrats I guess?

>>14347298
This tranny has a good sense of prose, for sure. Interesting perspective to read, he/she made some interesting points about the hypocrisy of certain feminists, even if I don’t agree with the larger argument. Bit at the end was a bit forced sentimental insightful, but b for effort.

>>14348340
Female sexual urges don’t have an on/off switch, I speculate women are even poorer at controlling them than males are at controlling their own. Female sexual urges simply don’t have a concrete and simple end-point, ejaculation, and so they’re dissolved throughout every part of the psyche with a milder intensity and more variation through the population.

You don’t have a feminine sexuality. Even if you did have a feminine sexuality, it wouldn’t indicate that you had a female brain. Even if you thought it did, you would have no way of knowing. What do you think it’s “like” to have a male brain?

>>14350038
>good sense of prose
really? i skimmed through it a little bit and didn't really like it. reminds me of the quality of writing in did in 12th grade. albeit, i am a fan of writing that is similar to the way people normally speak, but that could also just be because i prefer audibooks.

>>14350326
>what do you think it's "like" to have a male brain?

Based on my observations, I seem to think differently from a lot of men. I just don't feel sexual attraction in the same way a lot of guys seem to for a start. Just to name one example, most guys go mad over fanservice of female characters in fiction, but I'm pretty indifferent to it. That's not even mentioning how my consumption of porn coincides with many ways women consume porn (i.e prefering erotic lit over live action porn, liking porn to have romantic interaction rather than just plain fucking etc.). Add on top of that the fact that I've never really cared about masculinity that much and the fact that I relate to women more than men on average. The more I think about it, the more it feels like my being born male was an accident of some sort. Still, like I said, I don't want to be a tranny because it wouldn't actually make me a girl; I just wish I was a girl sometimes, if that makes sense.

>>14350685
based post. this just means you are closer to enlightenment than the average person, and want a partner you have a strong emotional connection with.

>>14347233
The guy at the bottom of the pic is what most trannies look like, plus long stringy balding hair and the ghost of a mustache they forgot to shave that morning over crimson lipstick as they take their hideous selfie for validation online.

>>14347189
>>14347197
>>14347278
its called "autogynephelia" you fucking coomers. stop cooming.

>>14347329
Pornography-induced homosexuality is real. Or just keep jerking it and degrading your mind and body. Jack it til your prolactin levels are sky high and you get bitch-tits from cooming all day. Have fun when your hair falls out and you go blind.
>T-those are old wives' tales!
ok coomer

>>14350870
>Jack it til your prolactin levels are sky high and you get bitch-tits from cooming all day. Have fun when your hair falls out and you go blind.
i think that is a stretch, although porn is bad for mental and moral reasons and should be banned.

>>14350719
I definitely want a partner with a strong emotional bond. It's the reason I pass up on opportunities where I can get easy lays.

Still, I can't help but feel my mindset puts me in an awkward place mentally. I fully acknowledge that I place women on a pedestal, but not in the same way an incel/nice guy type would. I genuinely think women are better than men and I'm a little bit of a misandrist too. Deep down, I know this mindset is wrong and I should treat everyone equally, but I also think I have something of an unconscious bias against men.

Ever since I realised the possibility that I might be mentally a woman, it's not only explained so much about why I never quite felt like the other boys and how my parents have always accused me of being "a big girl", but it's also seriously fucking with my head because I feel like I don't belong with men, yet years of male socialisation means that I'm not confident about jumping in to be "one of the girls" either. It fucking sucks.

>>14350902
> enby cope engages

>>14350902
i am very similar to you from what im reading.

>I definitely want a partner with a strong emotional bond. It's the reason I pass up on opportunities where I can get easy lays.
same. ive passed up probably a dozen chances and am 22 and a virgin, but i dont regret passing them up - im actually glad i did. i know i wont be happy if i just sleep with a girl for the sake of sleeping with a girl.

>but I also think I have something of an unconscious bias against men.
it's probably just because a lot of men these days think about sex very materialistically; whereas, women by their inherit nature, are in generally going to always see things in a more emotional and connection based way. nonetheless, i still feel that a majority of white men do want a deep connection with their partner, not just sex for pleasure. nonwhites in general tend to be much more materialistic, though i do find exceptions every now and then.

>Ever since I realised the possibility that I might be mentally a woman
jung, evola, and many other 20th century thinkers stressed the idea that people have both male and female components to them, and the closer you are to self actualization, the more you will be a blend of both. maybe try to integrate healthy male components into your life. i highly suggest you read "Sun and Steel" by mishima. it is not long of a read and is truly an amazing work of art.

>>14350912
I don't want to think of myself as enby because I don't look androgynous enough. For now, I've mentally settled with considering myself an effeminate male and a lesbian who somehow wound up in a male body. I'm avoiding trans stuff because the constant battles MtFs on /lgbt/ have with their gender identity tells me that they aren't happy. My hope is that I make a bunch of female friends or find friends through a gf, and that I can earn their trust so they can accept me as an "honorary girl".

>>14350953
I must admit that I've been avoiding Mishima because of his sterotypical image as a macho man. I like some aspects of masculinity, but fetishising masculinity is something I find obnoxious. It doesn't help that a lot of masculine works of fiction often have some elements of sexism and/or misogyny. I find misogyny disgusting because of how highly I think of women. I'd love to read an author that holds women in high regard while still promoting a healthy view of masculinity-- That might help cure my misandry, but I've yet to find such an author.

>>14351038
i really think you will enjoy "Sun and Steel;" please give it a read, you will more than likely be surprised. he evokes a much older type of masculinity the hearkens back to the samuri of japan and the knights of europe.

>>14351038
/lgbt/ is poison and you shouldn't take the nonsense that happens there seriously. If youre an effeminate male thats fine, if youre a tranny thats fine, if you're anything else thats fine too, but don't cuck yourself because of how other people see you. Doing so will make you miserable, and you deserve to be happy anon.

Sounds to me like you're an autogynephile with obsessive-compulsive tendencies