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/lit/ - Literature

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File: 59 KB, 447x536, JesusClearsTheTemple.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14290063 No.14290063 [Reply] [Original]

Matthew: Conservative Jewish Jesus who likes playing with hellfire
Mark: Paranoid-schizophrenic Jesus
Luke: Weak and effeminate Jesus
John: ???

>> No.14290065

>>14290063
Logos-jesus

>> No.14290088

>>14290063
John:
Jesus teleports behind the Jews and says "nothing personnel kid"

>> No.14290109

Matthew: The son of David
Mark: The suffering servant
Luke: The son of Man
John: Creator of all things

>> No.14290162

>>14290063
The mans name was Yeshua. Aramaic and hebrew dont have the letter j. Your saying yay-Zeus. Christ is just Ceaser. Wake up. Hes just another rabbi. I wish he was the messiah but its not happening.

>> No.14290169

>>14290063
Matthew: Kike Jesus
Mark: Kike Jesus
Luke: Kike Jesus
John: Kike Jesus

Very consistent t bh

>> No.14290243

>>14290063
John is by far the easiest to caricature.
Congratulations "if x then y checkmate" troll, you have only yourself played.

>> No.14290259

>>14290243
Are you that insecure about your beliefs you get angry if someone makes fun of them?

>> No.14290288

>>14290162
>Your saying yay-Zeus
What is this, /x/? Jesus is just how the Latins said it, (Iasos in Greek) also only Spanish speakers stress the jeSUS, English speakers typically say JEsus

>> No.14290317

You missed Guru Jesus

>> No.14290323

>>14290063
>Luke: Weak and effeminate Jesus
What about the Rich man and Lazarus? He sends him to hell, eternal hell, not because he was downright bad, no, something Christ regards as much worse-----he didn't take the time to notice the man suffering right below his face.

No where else in the Bible is the torment of hell so bad, where there is no reprieve, no hope of redemption. He was in such torment that even a dip of the man he walked over every day's finger would not be given.

>> No.14290331

Mark: Jesus the Jew
Matthew: Jesus the Zionist
Luke: Jesus the SJW
John: Jesus the Nazi.

>> No.14290425

>>14290288
Regardless hes not the messiah which is self evident from the balkanisation of montheism introduced by Christianity.

>> No.14290484
File: 165 KB, 800x1088, evangelists.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
14290484

>>14290063
Matthew: Christ as human.
Mark: Christ as king.
Luke: Christ as servant.
John: Christ as God.