/lit/ - Literature

I'll keep posting if people are interested

>>12677271

Please tell me this is a joke... Please

>>12677282
it gets worse

>>12677271
>>12677276
>>12677285
>>12677292
Bugs.. easy on the posts....

>>12677271
Is that a mistake in the first sentence? Aren’t you supposed to proofread?

I can't wait to hear everyone's reactions. Thanks for this OP

there's more I'm just adding slowly if people care

>>12677271
>It was a stormy night

Haven't read it but wow that's bad

>>12677305
Technically two? Or am I a retard. He says "where people CAME to die" and then "where screams become faint" became would be correct? I'm a brainlet

I refuse to read or write in double spacing. All of my papers in college past the first year were submitted singlely spaced. I took the hit for formatting, which was minuscule; were it double spaced, it would have looked like every other pseud paper and the eyes get tired of reading and the flow is not there. Likewise, I never bothered with the usual APA or MLA style citations, as it interrupted the flow of my work. I would always use footnotes with superscript denoting which one. It also was easier for me, because doing it the traditional way took more time than writing the paper itself. Yes, I suffered some point loss but never enough to reduce me out of the A range. I would counter that had I written like a pleb, I would have been much worse off as, my work would not have been read, but rather, scrutinized word by word. Almost like how modern Bibles butcher the Pauline epistles by subdividing his rich, lengthy sentences into simplistic verses for brainlets. I will not stoop that low. Double-spacing apologists can all burn in hell.

>>12677271
Why are you posting pictures you took of a piece of paper you printed out? It was already in a digital medium, you printed it out physically to once again render it digitally? This makes me so irrational mad what the fuck. Why would you print it out to show it to people on the internet?

>>12677334
>It was already in a digital medium, you printed it out physically to once again render it digitally? This makes me so irrational mad what the fuck. Why would you print it out to show it to people on the internet?

It was delivered in class by paper. I didn't write it you mongoloid. I would've just pastebin'd the whole thing if it was online but our teacher has us annotate everything by hand.

>>12677336
>I didn't write it you mongoloid.
Excuse me for thinking somebody on /lit/ actually wrote something for once because it's straight dumpster fire fucking garbage.

How the fuck does someone get into a creative writing class when half of their sentences are missing a verb?

>>12677334
>>12677328

You got braindamage there friendos?

Watch your back, this guy might pull a Cho Seung on your ass.

>>12677351
I sleep like 12 hours a week.

>>12677334
You might be retarded.

>>12677351
>critiques double spacing
>proceeds to reply reddit spaced
You make me sick.

>>12677383
I'm willing to admit to the retardation of that post, have you ever done the same? Kill your self.

the finale
thanks for reading
we workshop his paper on monday and I have no fucking clue how anyone is going to do it
I have no idea where to begin with this shit

>>12677391
Performance art.
Walk up to the front of the class and burn it.

>>12677389
Get irrationally mad at pictures on the interwebz totes. All the time.

"TBC" in my mind he hands in the continuation of the story for every single assignment. I hope you see Michael in verse one day, OP.

>>12677396
>reading comprehension
No, you make retarded posts unapologetically, like now.

>>12677391
You tell the truth. You say it's horrible and explain how without using too many adjectives. It's objectively filled with errors, the rest is up to you. Also, try not to be smug about it. "I don't really think I'm a good writer, but..." might help to humanize your tearing down of that shit. Because it is shit, I agree with you. I only managed to read half the pages you have put here. It seems a teenager wrote it. I wrote something similar in tone and theme even before I was in high school. That story is unacceptable.

hey don’t laugh, michael gira wrote this

This had to have been written by sn ESL person

>>12677386
>complains about "reddit spacing"
yikes and cringe, say something meaningful, you fags are worse than grammar nazis

Wait a second...I wrote this!

>>12677455
nazis?

>>12677455
You want meaningful? Here you go: >>12677328

>>12677317
>it was only a flesh wound
There's no way this was written by a college student, right? There's at least no way an English major could've written this.

>>12677358
>Shotgun sodomy
I'm going 180, this guy is a /lit/rician

>>12677358
>>12677391
>that ending
calling it now, future Nobel laureate here

>>12677317
Switching tenses in the middle of a sentence. How did this person end up in a creative writing class?

>>12677271
Hey this is pretty good

>>12677317
HAHA
A 10 y-o girl hog-tied and covered in maple syrup? Loudest I've laughed in a long time. Reminds me of the story of an anon who finds a girl and force feeds her eggs. Either OP is a dedicated shitposter or some loli loving, know-nothing has found his way into university. I more believe the second possibility.

>>12677328
Holy shit, are you me? I'm not as based as you in that I submit single-spaced, but I find that if I don't at least write and read my work in single-spaced, I produce only garbage and it never flows well. You're not alone out there anon.

>>12677317
"One medic replied with, 'Michael saved her.'"

>>12677271
woah
not cool to post without permission OP

>>12677271
get ready to be copystriked, OP

>>12678871
You know what they say, based minds think alike.

>>12678866
>Either OP is a dedicated shitposter or some loli loving, know-nothing has found his way into university. I more believe the second possibility.
You're a fucking retard

>>12677271
I like what this guy's shitty writing style does to my brain.

>>12677271
lmao at the grammar spergs upset about a couple run-on sentences. The story has more insight and tension than most of the original work posted here unironically seeking praise.

I saved a few really awful pieces from my undergrad workshops. I'll see if I can find them.

I'm also in a creative writing class although most of the submissions are benign. Is this about to become the seminal /workshop/ thread?

>>12677271
Unironically too painful for me to read past the first page. I’ll give you some real advice though, OP.

Everyone who takes creative writing starts out pretty shit, unless you’ve already been writing a long time. Even being well-read isn’t enough, you make a lot of mistakes early on just out of obliviousness, and you kind of just have to make them and learn not to do them the next time.

The best thing you can do for someone who is so utterly bad like this is point out the concrete mistakes they make instead of just saying the whole structure is garbage or giving them your opinion on the literary aesthetics of their story (which they can easily throw out).

It looks like there are some major technical and grammatical errors here and a lack of rigorous proofreading. Just communicate that to them. Beginning as a creative writer, most of the learning process is just making less mistakes with each story. So what you can do for this chump is say, here are some basic things you can correct, your run on sentences, lack of commas, tell them to proofread their work carefully, etc. then the next time, they will still be shit but at least they won’t make those mistakes. And maybe over time they can make a fewer mistakes with each new project.

Y'all are plebs, this kid is bleeding raw talent. All he needs is an editor to make him the next Cormac McCarthy.

>>12677276
An unironic gem in a pile of shit

>>12677276
>>12677317
keep posting, this is fun

>>12677317
>"I have Molly, heroine, spice, and everything nice."
sounds like fun.

>>12677391
Thoroughly engaging, I enjoyed it a lot.

>>12677271
whats a social college?

our professor would tell us not to write overtly violent shit

>>12677328
Fucking this. I cannot stand the double spaced meme. It irritates every nerve.

>>12680186
>do not write overly violent shit
You're professor is a moron, then. Much of the best literature of the past hundred years-- no, most of human history-- has, in some regard, based a portion of itself in the inherent violence of man. Blood Meridian is probably the best recent example.
I mean, I guess I get it: it's very hard to do well, and very fucking easy to make a bunch of cringy, pseudo-grimdark nonsense, but come on. You can't just write it off entirely.

this story would be based if it was just one giant run-on sentence

>>12680055
hey that's good indeed

Alepska was a remote harbor. It was a place of infinite reunions; that of prisoners to their thoughts, that of man to his loneliness, and those of spectators to their complicity. Society did not fear the fear of Alepska itself, of course. It is not that a wealthy to-do from Augustburg fears that a disheveled and homeless person will be on the steps to the train at all, but rather a dread that the wretched vagrant will look up and peer into her eyes. Such was the relationship of Alepska to the rest of the world.

One lively night, the black and shapeless waves were smacking against the rocks jubilantly. From a cell on high, the young man listened to this terpsichorean performance. He reckoned that this strange and hellish cacophony would have been not unfamiliar to the witches of Bald Mountain. The humor struck him: here too, was a hero of no values; prince of no kingdom; seduced by the simulcra of a lover long dead; here a cthonic dance tormented him also.

>>12680552
jeez this is good

>>12677358
>Let us re-enact the part where you rapped my sister

The voice of his generation?

>>12680552

Need to shit out that thesaurus and try again.

lmao this story fucking rules

>>12680637
>>12680680
the critics are polarized

I love when we have threads making fun of some random guy's shitty writing, like with that Catgirl Misaki thing recently

>>12677285
>Poured the beer... lit it on fire"

>>12677271
hot damn, gonna read this with coffee tomorrow
thanky, OP

>"there's a lot more filth that needs to be cleansed from the streets of New York."

Amazing.

>>12677285http://i.4cdn.org/lit/1551347399858.jpg
> where the prostitute's ratings are high with HIV

Holy shit. I'm a leftist in politics, a right-wing elitist in literature. Writing should banned for those who cannot write

>>12682412
Does that mean double autism?

>>12680055
This makes me believe it's elaborate performance art

>>12680552
>but rather a dread that the wretched vagrant will look up and peer into her eyes. Such was the relationship of Alepska to the rest of the world.
pretty good my dude, keep writing and trying to publish

>>12677394
this desu

>>12677271
Oh wow.
I seen some shit like this before. A friend of mine once handed me a self-insert-mario-fanfiction-rap. I burned it to protect their dignity. But that's the only thing I can think of which compares.

anon...
you really shouldn’t be posting workshop material online
im ashamed

i led a workshop (club at uni) that got a story similar in spirit to this one but with worse grammatical errors and, instead of the fixation on violence, there was a fixation on the protag’s date’s outfits, which were described in My Immortal Harry Potter levels of detail
it was actually worse, ill see if i can find it

>>12680055
holy...