/lit/ - Literature

>getting fucked up by literal ink on a piece of paper

>>12500758
ikr, pretty spooky

>>12500739
Hey i remember that thread, from were that image come from. Cool anon the one who made the image, it was certanly from a time where /lit/ wasnt a pile of reddit tier posts

>>12500739
Ive just become more and more cynical, I was already an edgy as fuck teenager at the beginning of this process, and it's gotten to the point where I feel barely human anymore. What I discovered is that you can so far beyond the pale of what you're allowed to think that you stop setting off alarm bells because people don,t even have antibodies for whatever fringe perspective you've arrived at in your isolated misery. After having increasing trouble getting along with people for years, you suddenly find interaction much easier and without conflict because there is no common ground left to fight over. This is a small victory of sorts, I am no longer angry, and my interactions with people are pleasant enough. I haven't offered my honest opinon to what I still call my 'friends' in something like 5 years now, I just go through a kind of zombie relationship with them. I made the mistake of attempting genuine connection with the last girl i dated and I found once again a sort of black hole of idiocy lying right beneath a thin layer of unexamined beliefs congealed from instinct and social pressure

The very worst part is knowing youare just as pathetic as everyone else, trying to rationalize the fact that the real reason you 'love your girlfriend' is because her face and tits are nice and you have some inside jokes or something, not because of some fabled intellectual or emotional connection you each project on the other while not understanding them. And all your theories you've attempted to construct are sad impulses towards rescuing your image of yourself and the world from the bleak and unpleasant reality that keeps impinging on you. More than anything we try to find a way to look at existence and say 'this can be fixed', and every miserable deformed person dying alone right now indicates that the only possible way this could be true is if this world is a punishment that will be redeemed by a better afterlife, for which there is no evidence and never will be. The paticularly pathetic among us try to elude this entire issue by deforming our understanding of reality with concepts that sublimate all that is negative into a Whole, an Atman, something that cannot be criticized by logic because it transcends it. These same people cling like infants to concepts like free will and morality, vigorously deny what they see as an overly biological conception of humanity, even though if they were truly privy to higher modes of understanding this sort of squabble should be entirely irrelevant to them, based as it is in 'dualistic thinking' and other illusory modes of apprehension, far below the sacred Oneness they know is the truth.

Some people are fairly fortunate, and don't suffer as much while actively enjoying life to a degree, they are given a more pleasant ride-along than others, though they don't really understand what is happening, they just have a nicer dream, and this is the only good part of reality. Everything else is shit

>>12500739
Reading Blake made you start wearing a fez and grow a silly mustache?

>>12500878
What drivel. You are dumb.

>>12500739

I don't think reading is what has fucked me up
If anything I started out so fucked I could read anything and come out the same or better on the other side

I dislike more and more everyday. I know I've changed, but I wonder if this board has also.

>>12500983
I'd be interested to know what you believe but somehow I doubt you'll post it. Whatever it is I think you know on some level how flimsy it is, and how easy it would be to cut down

I just hate <insert hobby here> more.

>>12500983
Don't be mean to others.

>>12500983
>i can't read

>>12500878
Good post. Why should we throw down lengthy posts with effortless two word responses? No better than phone posters!

>>12500878
Imagine being so arrogant that you assume the disinterest people show in the face of your inane ‘fringe perspective’ (lol) rants is an indicator of low intelligence and not just commentary on your absolutely brainlet-tier perception of the world.

I saw you replied to that other anon asking him what his counter-argument was. The reason he’s not responded, most likely, is that you’re not made any argument yourself. Some vague rambling about how ‘everything is muh biology’ and that there’s no free will because of that (see, again, you’re dumb) doesn’t constitute anything seriously worth arguing against.

I suggest you stop posting and get laid.

>>12501161
I understand that this sort of topic upsets people but try to at least read my post. I don't talk about this in real life, I understand how to entertain people's delusions so that they don't get upset. If you think just having friends and girlfriends can solve any of what I posted then you are either very young or just incapable of reflection.

>>12500739
Reading has unironically saved my life. It has given me an outlet to take part in dialogues that I wouldn't be able to have with anyone I run into on a daily basis

>>12501176
Your post is just the run-of-the-mill ‘oh god im just too smart it hurts’ post you see on this site every day. The only difference I can see between your post and the thousands before it is that you’ve admitted to not being a teenager.

The fact is, your opinions aren’t fringe, you’re just boring.

>>12501200
My post has nothing to do with intelligence at all, I am beginning to suspect you didn't read it. Many people feel as I do but it remains fringe, it isn't spoken about in public.

What do you believe? How do you justify existence in the face of constant suffering by people who cannot be saved?

>>12501178
Agreed

I was fucked up to begin with, would have an hero'd if I didn't start introspectively construing

Granted reading fucked me up more so than before but it ran with the light, so I'm more austere in general but sometimes I can manage to have dry humor about it. I applied to the on-campus library as an "associate" so there's that. Polis.

>>12500878
Why don't you just kill yourself?

>>12500878
I can't make you happier, because I can't even make myself happy, but I want you to know I read your post Anon and understand your desolation.

>>12501161
>getting laid solves everything

>>12500878
whats it like having friends and a girlfriend?

>>12500878
>don't share your real opinions with anybody
>attempting to do so results in finding "a sort of black hole of idiocy lying right beneath a thin layer of unexamined beliefs congealed from instinct and social pressure."
I'm sure your hyper intellect has rationally constructed the best perceptions of the world that ever was. You are a coward for hiding yourself and believing that you've gone beyond the pale from not talking to anyone.

It's made me an unpleasant person in long term relationships. Constantly pointing out peoples contradictory beliefs and scrutinizing their reasoning slowly gets under their skin. Like the other anon I''ve learned to restrain myself since it would result in pain for both parties. A sense of guilt would overwhelm me every time I caught the the effect of my lashes in someones eye. No amount of politeness or precaution could stave off the psychic pain. I became a better bully.

>>12501998
I think you forgot to add American Psycho to the Fez wearing enlightened list.

Have you ever considered that you're just fetishizing an image of yourself as an edgy, loner anti-hero instead of engaging with life?

Have you ever considered that your gf & friends notice your contradictions in ethos and have the emotional maturity to not dwell on it and let it define you as flawed?

Consider not assigning an identity to yourself, adhering to it and then feeling sad that you're the lamest version of thing you wanted.

>>12500739
reading has had little effect on my life. it's mostly just made me feel dumber because i don't pick up on the larger meaning of whatever it is i'm reading.

>>12502013
Its not a question of identity but probably an actual psychological problem that has been magnified to some extent (and culled as well) by reading. My fsther exhibits similar traits so I suspect its heritable. The point is I more often then not impose my will and over time this (at a subconscious level I suspect because its usually consciously cloaked in compromise ) causes people to manifest feelings ot hatred toward me. Im by no means abrasive but when people get emotional it becomes obvious during disputes that what matters is being able to impose their will not get to a truth.

>>12502121
How has reading fucked you up if it's a genetic inheritance?

Isn't reading about self-improvement and understanding? Empathy?

It sounds like you're using it as a tool to exceptionalize yourself instead of overcoming emotional problems. Reading should open doors, not just confirm your worldview.

>>12502135
Because it adds to the reservoir of power and ability to impose my will.
The core issue (psychic pain from using power) is not from reading but reading magnifies it.

>>12502163
Well, it sounds like you've got it all figured out then.

You're sociopathic desire to exert your will over those around you causes you pain. Try being introspective. Try watching your thought processes and being culpable for your decisions.

Or blame it on books like the meme guy with the big head from the library.

It sounds to me like you're too lazy or defeatist to own the fact that you give in to the path of least resistance, which in your case is exploiting loved ones. Why not be more aware and try not doing that?

>>12500739
Quite the opposite. You faggots have an inherent talent to twist even the simplest hobby.

>>12502183
Theres no way to tame this will anon. I sit for 10+ hours a day doing creative work (music) and talk to people on weekends. Sometimes theres no controlling my behavior. Thanks for your time btw

>>12502183
That's hardly sociopathic, I do the same thing. Staying around anyone will influence your worldview, if your worldview is stronger it's going to affect others unless you can justify a reason for not letting it all hang out
>>12502244
Try to be a distant brooding lead-by-example kind of guy. If they ask you'll have answers, if they say something that tugs on you try to understand what would best result between the two of you in how you should understand them long term. Encourage them to develop the views they're barely able to utter out. When you define a view you discover things about it you didn't realize, eventually distancing yourself from the naive beginning of it.

>>12502183
Retard

>>12502183
I appreciate your posts, anon.

>>12502281
Good advice. Thanks

ITT: oh my god oh god im too smart watch out normies im going to blow you apart with my massive intellect oh gond im cumming aaaa

>>12503089
kek

>>12500739
damn this OP is actually me not even memeing...... feels bad knowing my life trajectory as a reader is so common place and predictable haha

>>12500878
Lol Theo, grow tf up you weakling

>>12500739
Faggot

>>12500878
i can understand some of what your going through but i think your main problem is the people you are friends with and relationships you make, If a girl doesn't have the best boobs or pretty face but she can be someone you can feel connected to on level you desire then surely that could be worth it. They are hard to come by though.

>>12500739
The opposite really, its cool to read and learn so many different perspectives, philosophies and creative stories. In that time i have grown to be fulfilled mentally and spiritually.

>>12500878
nice copypasta btw saved.

Reading helps me understand other people, cultures, mentallities... Kinda what >>12503169
talks about.

>>12502183
Imagine being such a pussy you think imposing your will is sociopathic. When is the last time you left your mother's basement?

>>12500878
This is the crying of a man whose life is lived only in his head. Your heart feels, knows things which can't possibly be true according to your head. But there's always a possibility, and the head must ultimately admit that.

>>12500878
Realize that even if you think other people are stupid and only skin-deep, their emotions are as real and good as your bleak outlook on the world. You are allowed to feel emotions, and they must not lose their value simply because you feel like you understand their causes. Also it sounds like you think you are so rational that you don't realize when you aren't. Rethink that bleak nihilism and all you have read, get your ass out of your head.

>>12500878
>The very worst part is knowing youare just as pathetic as everyone else, trying to rationalize the fact that the real reason you 'love your girlfriend' is because her face and tits are nice and you have some inside jokes or something, not because of some fabled intellectual or emotional connection you each project on the other while not understanding them
lol why is that bad
being with someone because that person is sexually attractive is much superior than some cheap emotions
human sexuality is not bad

>>12500776
It was like month or two ago newfriend

>>12500878

>>12500739
Reading is great because it challenges my views of the world and other people around me. It reminds me that my mind is incomplete without other peoples thoughts. It makes life a little bit more exciting when there is a good story.
Finally it has the potential to give meaning to parts of existence where beforehand there has been nothing. This potential must be what OP means when he says that reading can fuck you up. However I think this only can happen when one is unable to put these writings in the right context. Thus reading more or other stuff helps to understand what the author wanted to say. (Good) Literature arises from the author's urge to find salvation even though he first has to go through lots of desperation to find this if he ever does.

>>12500739
fuck off shitskin

p bad

>>12500878

>>12500878
>craving human connection

Wow, you really are retarded

I went from feeling as though I had a moral duty to die to loving the feeling of my own breathing. It feels so good to breathe and as long as I’m breathing I can withstand any torment

>>12500878
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1FmE2t9Y_I

>>12500776
/lit/ is basically reddit: the contrarian edition.

Nice to see Ghazali and Luria mentioned here.

>>12500878
>>12504032
There's an interesting link between these two posts. How do you deal with the fact that real life interactions are vapid in comparison to the deep, meaningful and well worded views on life and emotions put forward in novels?

>>12503876
In part true, but most people hardly investigate their emotions/inner workings. It's hard to form an emotional and intellectual connection with someone who, although obviously having emotions, seems to just live by those emotions without thinking twice of it - often even blocking any real reflection on them out by seeking refuge in consumerism, thrill-seeking, alcohol, drugs, partying.

>>12503909
Non-argument, sexual attraction can of course be beautiful, but not trying for an emotional connection with a (sexual) companion is just aiming too low.

>>12501004
Now that's a strong nigga.

>>12500878
try shrooms so you gain a little empathy
>wah wah my gf hasn’t read Schopenhauer

>>12504939
>How do you deal with the fact that real life interactions are vapid in comparison to the deep, meaningful and well worded views on life and emotions put forward in novels?
It's the opposite. Few novels capture what real human interactions have. Most things written aren't close to Don Quixote, one of the few novels to ever capture humanity.

>>12501004
Yep

>>12500739
It turned my hopelesness into a sad beautiful melancholy. I still am involuntarily indifferent to life and have the certainty that I’m going to off myself at some point, but I’m glad I read the books I read.

>>12500878
You're likely over intellectualizating, or are simply depressed and trying to cope by intellectualizing.

People itt have given good advice (see >>12503149 and >>12503371). The best I could add is: people's opinions, including yours, generally don't matter and are very likely false if they make sense at all. You can live your life with hardly an opinion on anything and nevertheless not be a brainless sheep.

Consider how dwarfed you are by the body of human knowledge and the collective intellectual effort it took to amass it, and how that is dwarfed by the body of knowledge we would like to have amassed, and ask yourself how any pretention at having figured life can be anything but laughable.

The upshot is that the bleakness you see around you might very well be an illusion. It's merely an intellectual consolation, but it's something.

You can also remember that killing yourself is ultimately a possibility, and I don't mean this with an atom of animosiy towards you.

I recently understood, at a very personal level, how suicide was not necessarily a sin but a matter of rational decision. It felt liberating. I've been thinking about suicide every day for the past 8 years at least.

It still is the case, but I feel more relaxed, as it something that is still mostly in my own hands. And strangely enough it makes me want to kill myself less. You could try applying that dispassionate thinking to yourself. It takes time though.

Yet another approach would be to try to be have the best ride possible. Rather unprincipled and selfish, but with no hope of general salvation, surely it is the less deplorable path ? Worth trying at least.

I know it's hard to cast off an outlook that's been forming for years, so maybe the best you can do is to try articulating it in cogent and striking terms. Could you try piecing together an essay, treaty or novel detailing your views ? Of course that would require a lot of self-questioning, which can only read to refining your on system (or discard it altogether if it's too flawed).

You could post excerpt here, very few things are jugded fringe here (and there are pubished authors who have advocated for universal suicide, some of them even comitted suicide after that, you can hardly shock a really seasoned reader even outside of 4chan nowadays).

Moving out, travelling, replacing your old relatonships with new and generally making a drastic change in your objective conditions of living is often necessary for getting out of a depression-induced mindset. Basically don't sit passively like a coward, face the situation any way you can and take it into your own hands. For instance you could have taught that idiotic girlfriend of yours if you had cared to, and you would have learnt a lot from it.

Good luck and godspeed anon. Many have been there before you, more than a few have made it out.

>inb4 two words post that dimisses all my advice

you know those shitposters are just lazy fucks, don't submit to them

>>12504939
Most of real life interaction is actually interaction with yourself.
And no human brain is really deeper than another, barring severe trauma or malformation. Some people are simply more conscious of their own depths and more articulate about it. A lot is going on even in a simple conversation between two idiots, not to mention in the mere fact of looking at asnow-covered field through the window of a train

If anything reading literature should train your eyes, hear and mind for those kind of elusive complexities.

>>12505068
Not him, but this advice is excellent and uplifting. Once you accept that the fact that you’re not dead means you don’t really want to die, you can develop a more nuanced understanding of what produced that compulsion and the value in itself. The thought of suicide is an empowering comfort.

>>12500739
post the template, dipshit

>>12505006
Then why does reading about one of Sebalds hikes connect with me more than my girlfriend telling me about the guy her friend is dating?

>>12505123
>Some people are simply more conscious of their own depths and more articulate about it.
This is the core of the problem. The only way to form a bond with someone is by looking into their depths, which is highly (though not entirely) dependent on their being articulate about them. Literature is always a very articulate look into the author's depths, a look which almost always seems deeper than the one I'm allowed into the inner life of real life people around me. How do you deal with that?

>>12500739
/lit/ told me to read more so I stop being an incel but it just reinforced my worldview

>>12505157
I once worked with a guy who mostly joked about how everyone was a pussy and about people he fucked up or killed. He was serious. But talking to him more, I found out he left a woman because he loved her and thought his presence was destructive. I found out the woman he loved now was far more tolerant of his destructive tendencies, and he curbed his tendencies out of respect for that tolerance. This guy doesn’t read anything and lives by the sweat of his brow, but he possesses the same immeasurable depth as every other person who experiences an existence as as phenomenal as this one. Every person I seriously devote my time and attention to surprises me with their depth of feeling. My favorite quote from this man: “They say Rome wasn’t built in a day... that’s because they didn’t have me!”

>>12505068
not >>12500878 but props on giving a damn and responding well to his issues

>>12504939
Sometimes the beauty and complexity of the world makes me simply stop and wonder. Everything has many unseen layers to it, and people, with all their interaction, most of all. I'm probably some sort of autist, but I get by living a life of wonder. You can too, if you stop disregarding it.

>>12500878
...

>>12500878
Life is suffering, my friend. You can't escape it until you die. But honestly ask yourself, why you are suffering? Where does this suffering come from? I was sort of like you, feeling a sense of superiority over others because I knew some thing that they didnt. I started to get this feeling of disgust and disdain for those who could not see their conditioning, to consume and consume and consume. But what I didnt realize was that I was doing the same thing. The folly of man is the rational faculties that he has. How do we make sense of this world/reality? Everything is broken down in to If, Then statements, a binary. Its either this or that, and I have a sense that you understand this, to a degree.

Do you not see the irony of your judgement. The cynicism you have of this world is merely just a projection of your attempt of controlling it. You judge everyone who doesnt think like you, because you have this desire/expectation that they should be thinking just like you! You say, CAN"T YOU SEE THIS IS ALL AN ILLUSION?! WHY DO YOU PERSIST IN FRUITLESS DREAMS? Your disdain of others is just the same as those people who drone through life with a cell phone in their face trying to escape the reality that they are going to die. You havent let go my dude, and if you did you might even love those who you have previously judged. You might even want to try and help them see past the veil, but you cant want them to see, cause in they end they have to want to see for themselves.

Don't enter the loop. The loop of desire. It is an infinite cycle. No body likes being told what to do, especially the ego.

>>12501816
>everything is biology
>except for my supreme logical intellect, getting laid (as in, doing what my biology tells me to do) wont solve my misery


see you people think youre blackpilled but you dont understand that the truest blackpill is white and tells you to lean into your biology and accept the life illusion and live it to its fullest. use your knowledge to finesse the world into giving you whatever the fuck you want. youre stuck on the second to last step and refuse to keep going out of some ridicoulos and arbitrary feeling of finality and intellect. your views dont change shit so go get laid you fucking moron

>>12501816
it doesn't. what resolves everything is you and your bean of brain!

>>12500878
WAAAAHHHHH I JUST NEED THE RIGHT PERSON
Get gud at silence

>>12500739
>jack london after age 12

>>12502244
post your music

>>12500878
WHOA I AM SO SMART, I WATCH RCK AND MORTY AND WRITE LIKE A FAGGOT

>>12506017
Nauseatingly cringe post

>>12506017
I REALLY HOPE YOU ARE UNDERAGE

>>12503909
>cheap emotions

retard

>>12501816
Getting laid made me stop reading so...

>not reading the greatest works of Eastern philosophy and poetry after wading through the cesspool of western literature

These people were have subliminal sex with eachother through awareness of the Self

>>12501200
>your opinions aren't fringe, you're just boring
brutal

>>12500878
1 Corinthians 11:3 KJV
3] But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

>>12503910
Ah yes, the good old days! It was a different time, 2018 or possibly the beginning of January 2019, a better time! A simpler time when men were men and not girls (penis).

>>12501212
Life exists to propagate itself, retard.