/lit/ - Literature

Don’t captain a boat if you can’t scramble eggs

The last one to supper is first to clean their plate

If ur not BaD u can't DaB <O/

Do not covet the skin of thine father's wife

>>12025038
Solving transgenderism through psychoanalysis since 2018

You can't fuck a cat in the ass twice.

People never want what they want

Laugh a little blue

A thousand sticks don't make a tree

A cock in the ass is worth two in the mouth.

Even cows don't eat weeds

>>12025151
>>12025038
These are gud

Sometimes a rain-shower is a rainbow in disguise

Piece by piece you shall complete
at least so long as you don't cease

Your cup is bigger than your kettle

Don't put all your hands on the first loaf

Chickens crossing: drive carefully.

>>12025190
My favorite so far.

>>12025190
Collectivism btfo

Everyone wants to be rich, but nobody wants to be in the highest tax bracket.

>>12025038
PSA: This should be "thy father's" because thy/thine works like a/an.

Don't ride a horse before you've mastered the dawn.

>>12025225
Underrated

>>12025018
Two throws in the hole is one for the beak.

better a cup than a mug

You gotta do whatcha gotta do, and vice versa.

>>12025190
That's pretty clever actually

He who laughs last doesn't get the joke

>>12025018
To do without is to learn about.

>>12025473
He who laughs best laughs last.

>>12025018

YOU COULD HAVE PHRASED THAT AS: "FORMULATE AN APHORISM."

>>12025018
God helps those who help themselves

>>12025190

Yeah but you're still a faggot

36 Gs you and me we're alright today

>>12025554
The thread isn’t common quotes that mean nothing. In any case you’re probably just a lazy punk making excuses for other people and yourself. Have fun with your cheap liquor and dank weed.

Spin to the left and you'll end up on the right.

Circling the map won't deceive your destination.

One head is enough to spiral out of control.

Man who go to sleep with itchy bum wake up with stinky finger

When all you have is a penis everything looks like a vagina

>>12025018
http://inspirobot.me/
Tons of that here.

>>12026341

Blessed is he who walks the snowstorm with an empty cone.

>>12026208
this hits deeper than it arguably should

>>12026341
kek

>>12026341
surprisingly profound

>mfw /tv/ are better at this
They say one in the hand is worth two in the bush, but it's time for a hedge trimming, and I'm paying the landscaper. Caspere knew this.

You must live before loving the life of meaning, vefore loving the meaning of life

>>12026395
Jesus, thats not a real line from TD is it?

he who strives for feed and seeds something something chuck

The elevation of man coincides with the descent of mankind

In the beginning was the Word
and the Word was with God
and the Word was God.

>>12026407
It's a dog eat dog world anon, and I'm a goddamn Chinaman

don't paint the nigger white

Niggas iffy uh,
blicky got the stiffy uh

>>12025018
never drink whiskey from a teacup

>>12025190

But this HAS meaning.

The empty road has what no other road has: A view of the horizon.

>>12025018
dont close a door you cant open

>>12025065
best one yet

It would be fun to make a thing like >>12026341 with truly-random bible quotes.

>The dirtiest man often has the cleanest shoes.

>If you can't sell yourself, sell someone else.

>Once a bitch always a bitch, what I say.

you know what they always say, the difference between an atrocity and peace keeping mission is a sense of humor.

I love the rain but I can't live in a storm

If you give 'er the hooch, she'll give up the cooch

To dream is to breathe; to face reality is to face death.

A man without sleep is a man without doubt.

If your leg hurts, tap it three times.

Honestly, there's no place like Caracas

>>12027903
brb spamming this one on /his/ and /pol/

To define a thing is to obscure it.

Someone, somewhere, decided that eggs were a breakfast food.

my poetry may
be shallow but
rape is wrong

>>12028228
Rupi, don't you have too much money to be spending your free time in this hellhole?

>>12027994
This one is actually meaningful

The right man doesn't have to try.

A mud puddle isn't deep just because you can't see the bottom.

Sometimes, to be right is to be in the wrong.

>>12028242
I'm in the middle of The Book of Disquiet, so I may have stolen it from Pessoa somewhat.

>>12028228
my shallow wrong + poetry but rape + may be is - my but is - poetry be wrong - may shallow rape

Sorry, I'm OCD about determinants.

In the land of niggers, the niggest reign supreme.

Rock-and-roll is dead uniquely in the eye of the beholder

The first sin: when man listened to woman instead of God.

The stretch of flesh between the balls and asshole is the key to man's power.

>>12028255
please explain

A toddler's gotta do what is best for society

God raises mountains. Moles raise molehills. Men raise barrows.

>>12028290
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rule_of_Sarrus

A determinant is an operation performed on square matrices. For 2x2 and 3x3 matrices there are super easy formulas, and since my watch displays hours and minutes like this:

20
13

for 20:13 i.e. 8:13pm, I'm always compelled to compute the determinant of it. It is 2*3-0*1=6 in this example btw.

>>12028299
>moles raise moleskine

>>12028329
only autists are capable of exegesis keep at it anon i'm rooting for you

>>12025190
I'm going to repeat this and tell people I thought of it

>>12028329
what does it equal then?

>>12028363
Exegesis of what excuse me?

Anyways the watch determinant is always an integer between -45 and +18, in case you were wondering.

Don't pass life by on the wind.

>>12028382
nothing in particular, just saying that people like you are naturally good for structural analyses

>>12028376
In the rupi kaur copypasta example words were displayed in 3 lines of 3 words each, so I just combined words in a way akin to Sarrus rule (link related). It holds no meaning whatsoever because one does not usually add and subtract and multiply words.

In general, the determinant of a matrix of numbers is a clever way to determine whether the map represented by said matrix is an invertible function.

>>12028395
Thank you. Unfortunately I cannot feel or understand emotions.

>>12028428
basedpilled

>>12028428
you win some you lose some

Thirsty men do not pray

a claymore has more clay

Well it's like my dad used to say:

The moon won't listen no matter how much the wolf howls.

>>12026425
>In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God.

Pretty sure i heard this sampled somewhere

>>12028596
bedwetter?

>>12025018
Man who balance egg on forehead bear many children

>>12026422
based

If you seek out cringe compilations, you will find yourself in one.

Rise to the occasion and ferociously raw-dog the Absurd in the ass with no lube.

Prove me wrong—except you can't.

>>12025018
The first man to beat his meat will always yeet his skeet

-Byron, 1818

In the beginning there was Ishmael, seated in a room, surrounded by plump heads and stately bodies—and the bodies were with Ishmael, and the bodies were Ishmael.

Those who seek truth only uncover lies.

only in dystopia will you find no complains, only in utopia will you find no praise.

>>12025018
You don't need syrup to butter a pancake.

>>12025541
Tripfag doesn't know that an aphorism contains

>>12028415
but you can assign each letter a numeric value (1-26), multiply those, and then decode each string of numbers back into letters.

>>12028838
That's called gematria and is /x/ material. Combining qabalistic numerology with algebra could be fun I guess. There's already a thing called sacred geometry, so might as well... You could even combine sacred geometry with actual advanced geometry, which is so abstract that drawings are a patronising tool to exemplify particular cases of particular cases to initiates (this is a hyperbole of equation XY=1 in the affine plane over finite field F3:

2 OOX
1 OXO
0 OOO

012

Have a blast! Bidimensional. Not even projective. Super dumb field.)

Yea all math is essentially occult magick larping.

>>12028899
I wonder what 'insight' would be gained by reading modern classic literature with an eye towards each word having a specific numerical value, a la hebrew numerology. It'd be entirely based on confirmation bias, but it might be kind of fun.

Just two ducks shitting in a rainstorm.

The hat that bit the hand is the swiftest in the land.

Left to his own devices he'd tell YOU what the price is.

>>12025018
Never go searching for gold inside a dead man’s dream

>>12029561
change 'Never' to 'Don't' and you've got urself a winner

>>12025521
Who is longest best last laughs

There's still some meat in that crab, if you have the hammer for it.

>>12028428
But you know that emotions exist. Does it perplex you when you cannot understand what sadness is? Or perhaps it's like colour to someone who is born blind. I wonder if blind people do see colours in their minds eye but cannot comprehend what they are seeing and this causes them to overlook it

>>12026341
t-thanks

it's hard to cut an onion if you're already crying

Endings are forever

>>12028255
May shallow rape my but is poetry but rape may be is poetry be wrong, my shallow wrong.

>>12028966
Same insight you'd get from forcing an interpretation of the divine comedy as an allegorical represantation of world war two: a fun and useful excercise in creative writing, but probably not what the author originally meant. I like tarots because they have simple images but can have variously intricated interpretations.

>>12030087
I'd be perplexed if that weren't itself an emotion. Checkmate friendo.

>>12030207
May shallowness rape my butt
My butt is poetry
But rape may be poetry
Is poetry wrong?
Wrong. My shallowness is wrong.

Combinatorics and an open mind are an endless source of inspiration

All pussies are pink in the dark

A helping of hash belongs in the trash.

rust in the mind is gold in the throat

Sage

>>12030397
two in the hammock is one in the boat

People in glass houses should always wear clothes

>>12025581
Underrated. Very good post my friend.

>>12027903
can sum1 explain this 2 me? am i low iq?

>>12030691
Read the OP

>>12025018
"Praise Allah"
and my personal fave,
"Allahu Akbar!"

>>12027903
Tell that to Sarah Kerrigan.

>>12025018
"Many a man of mangled meat bore seed settling for a boar's feed."

aka skinny white niggas fappin all day to hentai wind up with fat bitches and piglets

>>12030777
As profound as 2018 can get, really.

>>12026341

>>12030785
Good trips end the year early, I say.

>>12030799
Checked for dubs but the message sucks. Or maybe I've ascended beyond the mediocrity of middle-aged New York jewry.

>>12028250
A puddle is always deeper than it seems.

>>12025018
To the baker go the dozens

>>12028570
What's his phone number

>>12030799
>>12026341
>>12030805
this is the least inspirational bot i've ever seen

>>12031003

In the mirror, yourself sees you

walkie talkies know how to communicate with each other.

i need 'x' as much as i need a horse to teach me the way

>>12031003
Seems inspirational enough to me.
>Be dead

Tibetan Book of the Dead deep with only two words? And so close to Halloween, with orange lights and dark bg? Bonus.

It's the pic jackpot equivalent of "I'm EDM af bro" without the "duchie of fratfag" connotations.

>>12028648
damn.

>>12031114
Yeah, it is also somewhat motivating from a reverse psychology standpoint.

>>12028329
Based. Are we in the matrix?

If you always expect the worst outcome you will never be disappointed

The best way to market yourself is to not market at all.

>>12031169
I was. Probably you still are. I made my way out computing determinant after determinant like I was slashing forest vegetation with a machete.

>>12025018
every walk in the park is a shot in the dark

cant recieve a signal without tapping into the frequencies

>>12028503
the only good one

In this moment, I am euphoric. Not because of any phony god's blessing. But because, I am enlightened by my intelligence.

Whores will have their trinkets.

>>12025521
but this is an actual saying in the nordic countries

You can fool all of the people some of the time - but you can't know for how much of that time any or all of those people are fooling you back

>>12025018
Rise to the occasion: fuck existence in the ass without lube.

>>12030731
yeah but it doesn't make sense to me..? all the other ones do

When you remember your mother, remember her proverbs not her praise. It's the only way a man can raise a daughter.

A frog isn't a foxhound, but that doesn't mean it don't hunt.

Treat the sunrise like a mountain, and the afternoon will be a molehill

When a man wears a watch, it doesn't make him on time.

If your going to give a friend your time, give him your best hours from the top, and he'll give you twice as much tomorrow.

Some things are only as important as you think they are, and only think things are as important as you think they need to be

When a man loans you an axe, don't compliment the grain of the handle if you don't intend to return it sharpened.

A lawyer who reprensents himself has a fool for a client, but when has it ever behooved a man to hire someone else to be brave for him?

Even the most beautiful peacock still just tastes like regular old chicken

>>12025018
It's ok to make mistakes. It's not ok to not learn from them.

>>12025018

A locomotive won't motivate you, but it just might drive you loco

Dont spend ten hours of elbogrease when you could use a drop of cheer

Have the humility that the Lord might be behind the next door you open, but not the expectation.

Don't run away from your problems but don't walk into disaster's path either.

You can't use your grandfather's boots in heaven.

A fishing hole only becomes a fishing pond when you catch something!

A man who eats trout from a plate has a husband for a wife.

Wearing orange in front of your father is like saying you saw him as a man before a friend, and a friend before fellow.

Some people need to take a picture to remember. Some people never remember. But a few people always remember to remember, and those people are the ones with real memories.

>>12026341

Frogs don't sing on Sunday

No one wants to be a millionaire, they just want to spend a million.

A titty in each hand isn't worth one in the bush

>>12032532
Thanks Dylan

>>12034305
this is surprisingly woke

look through the same window and the landscape wont change

To acquire, one must first obtain.

>>12025018
Those who face the new never sleep.

>>12025018

We must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children.

>>12035375
He said write a saying, not a joke.

>>12026341

>>12026341

>>12025035
Yasssss slay

Don't cry over puked baloney.

>>12026341
>http://inspirobot.me/

>>12026341

>>12028428
Based. There's a good reason people like you exist in a population.

>>12035669
So that someone can be made fun of?

>>12033750
Would be a bit less generic if you said its not okay to learn from them

Look for loneliness and you may find people

>itt: my song lyrics from when I was 16

>>12026341
This one applies to /lit/ pretty darn well.

>>12026341
HOLY SHIT

>>12035543
I love this site.

Your cum is not the greatest tribute you could pay to a woman

>>12030309
>May shallowness rape my butt
>My butt is poetry
>But rape may be poetry
>Is poetry wrong?
>Wrong. My shallowness is wrong

Nice hip-hop lyrics there

>>12028299
I like this one.

>>12026341

Nobody wants to be the guy left holding the straw.

It takes two to tango, but one to cook.

Spit in the wind and you'll get blood on your shoes.

Everybody thinks they're God. Nobody thinks they're Jesus.

Sometimes, going backwards is the only way to go back.

Life is like a meal; sometimes you need to put the fork down.

You can tame a snake but you can't change a clock.

>>12026341
Inspiring indeed.

>>12025541
fuck off back to effay and talk about your boyfriends tatoos

It's warmer in the forest.

A jester always plays hopscotch by himself.

>>12036415
>It takes two to tango, but one to cook.
I am going to use this one day. Thank you.

A man with phimosis can't shoot far.
Among animals only T-Rex can drive a car.
Circumcised men don't pee at the bar
It takes three to make war

>>12028363
That may not be right, but it's certainly false.

>>12025190
nice, this is my line now

inb4 shit novel, it's not even first draft leave me alone pls

>>12037156
shit

>>12025018
The shells look prettier in the water

Make sure there’s toilet paper before you take a shit.

A journey of a thousand miles ends, with a single misstep.

You can't not know nothing

Our life is an infinity of darkness between two points of light

A kitten born in an oven isn't a cake

Once you go Persian, there's no other version

>>12025018
If yuh dont sea no holl, yuh cant stayk da poll, but if yuh goat gota fine slitt, yoo can fukc et

>>12037867
Bullshit. I make the best Korea cakes.

The starving decide the taste of your bread

>>12025018

"
"
"
""
- Anonymous
"
- Anonymous
"
- Anonymous
"

he who watches the work reaps the reward

he who does the work takes in the reward

a tourist doesn't know where they've been a traveler doesn't know where their going

Sometimes it's better to starve than catch trout

>>12036078
Got a Hitler once.

A boner perceived is a boner achieved.

"Fame and Memory are the two largest liars."
Harlan Ellison

>>12028188
I want you to know you're part of the reason /his/ went to shit. You disgust me>>12028190

>>12039284
it was never good, that's what I enjoy about it

Patience must be learned posthaste.

>>12026341
Just so you know my mom showed me this a couple years ago.

Common men do what they want, wise men do what they must.

>>12025438
You gotta whatcha gotta do

Never boil water under a hot sun.

The hotter the chick, the bigger the dick.

The longest boat always makes for the shortest voyage.

>>12030397
If you change it to "Steel in the mind is always rust in the throat." its actually a really good nugget of wisdom.
>>12030572
good

>>12028188
>. You disgust me>>12028190 (You)
Did you quote me by accident?

>>12039773
no but you quoted me by accident, >>12039284 is who you're looking for
the fuck, is this site so hard to use lmao

>>12039786
Fuck, no idea how that happened.

>>12025018
don't try to get bread by destroying a sandwich

Don't do whats right, do what's left.