/lit/ - Literature

What are you on? Ive been on several medications (not at the same time) at this point and most of them after a period for a week to a couple months where you'll be in a sort of buzzy, unfocused headspace, almost like a nicotine high, but it does pass. Meds range from imperfect lifesavers to extremely destructive depending on you and your reaction, but in general they have enormously improved my productivity and output as a writer. I won't say that mental illness doesn't give any inspiration, but don't worry you're not going to lose your anxiety any time soon, the idea is just to keep it at bay long enough to live like a normal person as much as you can -- which for me has definitely manifested in being able to read and write much more consistently. Excercize, diet, and other healthy habits aren't memes, they're jusy as necessary as meds. Good luck anon, wish you the best.

>>11989602
I'm on Escitalopram. It's not Lexapro, but an equivalent. I just started taking them and I do feel better.

This actually helps a lot anon, because that's exactly how I feel: buzzy, unfocused. I'm glad to hear it's likely it will vanish. It's funny how we can become attached to our illnesses, I kind of miss my anxiety, as if I had lost a limb and now I just felt a phantom in its place.

But yeah, I just want to be able to write clearly again.

who /bupropion/ here

>>11989587
>crippling anxiety

Cbd oil / liquid.

>>11989587
I was on citalopram, then mirtazapine, and now I'm on paroxetine which has worked the best for me of the three, though I can't cum anymore and sometimes I start to jitter uncontrollably. sucks desu, but it's ultimately better than being paralysed by anxiety/depression.

>>11989729
Man I loved the energy and sex drive and it did treat my depression but not my anxiety, may have made it worse actually. I've tried so many things including various supplements and routines and whatnot and eventually just returned to zoloft which is what I started with, but now I lift and set a schedule for myself so I'm hoping that'll stop the effects from fading after a couple years like what happened when I originally started on it.

>>11989723
Yeah, sometimes I do miss the bare intensity of depressive episodes, and then the absurd rush of coming out of one and finding fairly mundane things like talking to a nice cashier or a pretty sunset to be overwhelmingly beautiful. To an extent I even miss reacting so viscerally and being sent spiralling by things like lost dog posters and disturbing news headlines. But I really can't live like that personally, and like I said it's not like that's gone, it's just being managed, and with my emotions managed better I've been able to travel a lot, write a lot of things I'm proud of, and have healthy relationships. It never stops being work and I'm always worried about things getting bad again, as I'm sure they will at least several times before I die, but holy shit am I glad that sometimes things are pretty good.

>yfw all these fuckin kids are literally insane spazzes

yikes from me phamalamadingdong

>started on SSRIs after being diagnosed with depression
>feel human for the first time in my life, actually enjoy getting out of bed, learning new recipes, talking to people, even got a new job
>after a month the high fades and I'm exactly the same
I don't know what's worse, never feeling human, or feeling human once then having it taken away

>>11989729
/bupropion/ gang. Also lurasidons which is stupidly expensive. Tybg I have insurance. I've been on antidepressants the last 8 years or so, you're not alone.

i was on heavy antipsychotics and mood stabilizers (and a bunch of other shit) for 4 years following a psychotic breakdown, the last 2 years consisted of a regimen of invega shots and lithium. 6 months ago i stopped all medication and smoked weed more regularly. i expected it to be hell at first, and it was, but what followed was a period of time where i felt most alive and even joyful. almost like how happy i felt before i was basically institutionalized. however this past month my depression has been kicking my ass, and it's a severe psychotic suicidal depression. i think about death and dreams constantly. the death of my father and grandmother have began the (selfish) process of me grieving for my own death. the psychotic is just a person who dares to ask questions and actually gives a shit what the answer is. sometimes i feel comfortable in my skin but i feel entirely inconsequential compared to the vast amount of data that's floating around. if i matter so much that my suicide would destroy a consciousness forever why don't people seem to notice me? the answers aren't on the internet, they're in friends (and family, if you're lucky) but the internet is fun.

>>11989723
Word of the wise: alcohol will sort of undo any effect it has on you and only makes recovery harder and longer, it's really not worth it to drink on escitalopram. Godspeed anon

>>11989729
How much can I drink on bupropion? I’m taking 150 mg a day