/lit/ - Literature

I'm tired

I'm hungry

I wanna make cummies

always take your own straw to a coke party kids

>>11098908
Met a former janitor from my hs years.
She is very sick now but still holds up and jokes as she always did.
In the old times she would say that I was her winning horse and I could do great things if I applied, but that I needed to be more sociable .
Once she told me "Thank god I came to know you, imagine if I wasn't aware of your existence, you could've died anonimously and nobody would have shed a tear or said something nice about you. Let people know who you are, speak up!"

I introduced her to my wife.
She smiled.

>tfw no lanky pale three meters tall androgynous omnipotent god gf to impale me then revive me and kill me again in perpetuity
Any books for this feel?

I am vulgarity itself.
I'm only a good soul at home.
An immaculate one.
But otherwise it's just masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation masturbation.
My life is masturbation. Total masturbation. I revolve and accelerate, my hand in my pants the whole time. I'm a ballerina dancing through the world.

>>11098971
if you used one of those milk flavor straws, would your coke be yummier?

>>11098971
They didn't have any or were the ones they had all gunked up?

>>11098974
Sounds like a nice lady.

Thinking of having a fap.

>>11098979
>Any books for this feel?
yes. A dildo.

>>11099014
I didn't mean impale as in a dick

I really want to write my Post-Apocalyptic/CyberPunk Story with a few fantasy elements sprinkle here and there. But I believe people will be out off by my first novel. How do I go by rectifying this?

>>11099016
that doesn't change my answer

I actually have a trigger that I've never told anyone about- if I see sexualized violence, I get launched into this weird state of mind where I'm really giddy and aroused and I start self mutilating. I've never really told anyone this, because I actually like it. While it's happening, I'm not worried about anything. The whole world is gone away. It's an exciting feeling. A fervour. I imagine that it's an almost religious feeling, like it used to be when people danced naked in the woods and ate raw goat hearts, or whatever.

>>11099018
Write something else

The other guy who is in the genetics thread is shitting up the place and doesn't come here to be a fun guy, apparently I'm a brainlet for wanting evidence from him.

>>11099136
yeah. that happens a lot.

>>11098989
Sort yourself out.

If the human mind defaults to bigotry, then we must find a solution other than education. We cannot expect everybody to be fully educated, even in the greatest conditions. Even if bigotry were not natural, it is far more cruel to keep a minority in a place that violently oppresses them than it would be to forcefully relocate them to a place where they would not be discriminated. But such a place hardly exists. In the ideal world, all different peoples would be separated into partitions of equal prosperity.
The one and the other cannot live together in harmony. Difference sows strife.
Freedom of speech is a dangerous concept. It relies on the belief that people will not release bad information, and that people will actively seek out good information. People will always accept bad information that is convenient for them or affirms their ego. People will always lie for their own benefit, with the use of bad information.
Unmoderated message boards on the internet have always been a bed for bigotry and degeneracy. Moderation, banning, blocking, and muting are all forms of censorship. To not accept that is to be in denial. If humans will present ideas and intermingled with other ideas, then they are at risk of being infected by bad information or intentionally subversive ideas. Ideas are dangerous, and thus they must be regulated as the the internet has already shown. Only a regulated forum can maintain an appearance of civility and moral values, and so with the internet representing a microcosm of human society, it can only be extrapolated that the policing of ideas and the restriction of free speech is necessary to facilitate a civil society where strife caused by differences remains.

>>11098908
>I must get up and do sometjing.
Anything. Come on, get your shit together.
Read, work out, go on a walk, cook, watch a movie. Get off this site. Stop refreshing the page, it's always the same old threads. Nothing remotely interesting. I have enough. Stop. Stop. Maybe one last time.

>>11099254
*cries*

>>11098908
i fucked up and wrote down the wrong date for my uni exam and now ive gone and missed my exam fuck this gay earth

>>11099308
an actual nightmare. break your leg with a hammer and say you fell down the stairs.

>>11099323
I fucking might to be honest with you

>>11099325
it's a solid plan. it doesn't even have to be a big break. just be careful not to accidentally fuck up your knee or ankle.

Can someone recc a book under $7?

>>11099346
most of them, off of amazon

What's the point of friendships in 2018? It feels like no one really wants to know each other so all relationships between everyone are extremely on the surface.

TWO FUCKING DAYS INTO WEATHER THAT ISN'T BORDERING ON FREEZING AND ALREADY THE RICH FAGGOT FUCKS ARE DOING CONSTRUCTION AND HAVING TEN LEAFBLOWERS A DAY RUNNING ON THEIR FUCKING POINTLESS RICH 3.5 MILLION DOLLAR BUNGALOW IN A SHITTY SUBURB HOMES LITERALLY AS I WAS TYPING THIS IT WENT FROM ONE TRUCK AND ONE BACKING UP SIGNAL TO TWO TRUCKS ONE BACKING UP SIGNAL AND A FUCKING CAR ALARM TED WAS RIGHT TED WAS RIGHT TED WAS RIGHT TED WAS RIGHT TED WAS RIGHT

>>11099355
I don't know, me and my friends know all kinds of shit about each other.

apparently niggardly doesn't mean what I thought it did

>>11099355
>>11099361
Me too. I have good friends. Feels nice.

>>11099352
Thanks...

>>11099372
me too. if I didn't have such amazing friends, I'd have killed myself years ago.

>>11099372
>>11099384
also, now that I'm on the subject, it's actually kind of scary. it's something so small, but those 3 people are close to my whole goddamn universe. recognizing that something as simple as having friends is the single thing that's made my life worth living kicked off a nice existential crisis. What if they die? What if they move away? What if I just hadn't met them? All kinds of things could have gone wrong!

>>11099384
>>11099404
Oh shit, what if I'm supposed to be a useless piece of shit and I'm spitting in the face of the universe? It's just a few tiny threads keeping out of an awful life of uselessness and degeneracy! I'm tormented by the idea that I'm actually garbage and that my friends are the only thing between me and absolute garbage existence. I'm a monster, holy shit.

>>11099333
I think I'm gonna have to bite the bullet and hope they'll let me resit it, I hate uni so fucking much, having to jump through hoops and stressing out over a subject I'm not interested in and don't want to do, and that I won't even be taking into next year, heavily considering dropping out to be honest

I'm worried that all my best sexual experiences are in the past.

>>11099355
There isn't any. Take the misanthropy pill

>>11098908

Hey op.

Just finished a big milestone in my life and am moving soon with someone I love away from our hometown. It’s very exciting. I have a few days to kill in the meantime, and I think it’s the first time I’ve had to be bored in about six months so I don’t know what to do with myself. I recently finished Norwegian Wood by Murikami, and I’m hoping to actually read this time Ulysses (which I’ve stopped and started too often). Alternatively, I’m thinking of reading JR by Gaddis, which was given to me as a gift and I would like to finish it before I see that person again.
Anyway, all is swell, and I’m very lucky to be wasting my morning away on /lit/ as I’m unsure the next time I’ll have over a week of time to kill.

:)

>>11099073
This almost sounds normal but you should talk to a professional about this anyway friend

>>11099263
>we cannot expect everyone to be educated
See that’s where you’re wrong kiddo. Almost the entire American population and much of the world is literate. We should marvel at that. Public schools teach algebra to children, calculus to teenagers. We live in an impossible time, and what we think impossible now may be normal in the future.

>>11098908
I live near a church and the bells ring every our from 11 in the morning to 9 in the evening.
No fucking wonder the rent was so cheap.

>>11099653
the education system is a factory for wage slaves. Kids are required to obey without question while we give them longer school days, more math and science, while reducing free time, art, music, literature. Students all over the world are showing harrowing levels of stress to the point of self mutilation, in some cases.

14% of americans are illiterate, half of them don't believe in evolution, and more than half don't know their own constitution, let alone the basic history of any other country. Some schools aren't allowed to teach evolutionary theory.

More is not better. Leave kids alone.

why do threads always end after I post?

Unless I reach critical acclaim in my lifetime, I will never know whether my friends and professors have consistently complimented my strong writing skills because they have low expectations of others or because I am a genuinely good writer.

Does anyone else feel this way?

>>11098979
Are you attracted by the Hyperion's Shrike?

Grrrrr errraggghhh uuuuuhhhhhh errrrnnnnnnnn Uhh I I I ughnnnn Fuck help help grrrrrrrrrr

>>11099803
stop jacking off

>>11099791
Haven't read Hyperion but from looking it up I'd wager no.
I had something a little more cuter in mind.

>>11099769
This depressed me.

>>11099769
All the time. I frequently seek out critique, only to find any positive feedback I receive seems fake somehow. Even if it's from a total stranger, I can't help but feel that they're just saying it to be nice.

>>11099361
>>11099372

How do you guys do it? Only stuff people around me ever want to discuss is work and pop culture garbage.

>>11099851
Join a writing club and go to a writing workshop

>>11099803
Iktf

>>11099263
Freedom of speech is a dangerous concept.
Who are these arbiters of "good information"?
The default system must be freedom to do otherwise is place power into the hands of the few, which is incredibly dangerous.

>Ideas are dangerous, and thus they must be regulated as the the internet has already shown.
Again who are the regulators?
>Only a regulated forum can maintain an appearance of civility and moral values
Who defines what is civil and moral?
Civility and Morality are not immutable.
Who defines what is considered civil and moral?
Finally, and most importantly, what is to be done who distribute "bad information", "dangerous ideas" or act in a manner that are considered to be outside of the boundaries of what is "civil and moral"?

>>11099882
show interest in that person. remember that both of you will have different interests. focus on common interests. i don't know- do friends stuff

>>11099911
Fuck me I need an editor

>>11099851

I feel most people don't acclaim my writing to "be nice," but rather because they feel socially obligated given their position. After all, a writing professor would be a shitty writing professor if their student didn't improve their writing skills throughout the semester.

Mostly, though, I think it's because other people are shitty writers. I read a girl's resume the other day—she's in the university's rapping club, and felt it appropriate to mention as much in her application—and she'd misspelled "rapping" with just one P. I understand that success in many fields doesn't necessarily breed the same sensitivity to the written word as success in other fields, but honestly... raping? Microsoft Office didn't catch that one, but you really should have.

Anyway, my point is that other people being shitty at a thing doesn't make an adequate person great. I want to be great at what I do. How do I seek greatness when most people's baselines are sub-average? How do I seek greatness when affirmation of greatness is an inherently flawed concept?

>>11099911
you're a good goy

>>11099920

What if you have literally no shared interests with anyone? And what is friend stuff?

>>11099599
source on cat

My 9/10 girlfriend loves and worships me but I am unhappy with her

>>11099929
underrated

>>11099932
I think you probably have to change your interests then man. Are you really not into music or any tv shows or films or anything? What about sports or games

>>11099882
In my case is similar scholar interests. I study literature, my friends study history, international relations and law, and we're always having in-depth conversations about politics, philosophy etc. That's not to say we don't talk about capeshit and vydia every once in a while, of course.

Try casually bringing up such subjects in conversation. Don't just talk about your view point but listen to theirs as well. You might be surprise with what people have top say.

>>11099932
>And what is friend stuff?
depends on the person, but going to a bar is a good bet. having a constant flow of beer and food nearby is basically a fool proof good evening.
If your problem is that you don't have any shared interests, then the problem is that you're not putting in any effort to connect with people. Ask what people are watching, reading, etc. There's always something to talk about.

Showing people you're interested in them as a person makes them friendly to you, and they'll eventually reciprocate. Friendships are give to get.

>>11099952

I love music, movies, vidya and books. The problem is I actually make the effort to find lesser known stuff in these areas where most people are very surface level and only likes what everyone else likes, which bores me.

>>11099970
so you're an obnoxious pseudo intellectual

Im here sitting alone,
on a bench.
Im here once again,
at the gym.
The mirrors around me,
there to constantly remind me
Of who I am, alone, on a bench
Why I am here also is reflected upon
Everytime I look across, from my bench

I was having an argument with some people the other day. I made the claim that while it is true that roles we play are to a large extent normalized by social practices and etc., humans are disposed to behave in certain ways dependent on their biological composition. This triggered the shit! out of them and they kept telling me I had no idea what I was talking about and that I had no clue what ideology meant and power relations and so on which I found strange since I have read Foucault and Nietzsche and Marx. Am I losing my mind here?

>>11099136
>in the genetics thread

that's where u fucked up, its like going into the hood and complaining thugs are shitting it up

>>11098908
what's on your mind

>>11100002
HAAHAHAHA SO CLOSE DUDE

>>11099940
Girlfriend just broke up with me felt the same way. I'm a perfect boyfriend and I gave her my heart and soul and she just wasn't happy.

Being the other person, I would say to sit down with her somewhere and tell her how you feel. If you don't want to work things out, tell her that but reassure her she's perfect if she is. Just don't give her false hope.

My gf told me she'd love me forever, and when we could get married, and loved to talk about potential children all the day before she broke up with me. So don't lie to her, but tell her and stop wasting her time.

>>11100000

>>11099993
No, but you are retarded to point it out even as fundamentally standing it posses in the pysche of individuals.
The reason is Humans are greater than the primal forces of what once dictated nature. The individual soul may work along the primal lines of activity but the potentiality is recursive only upon the personality that acts upon it. That's why free will exists.

>>11100010
>I'm a perfect boyfriend
this is where you went wrong. you're assuming you're perfect, but if you were, she wouldn't have left.

>>11099970

"Oh, I like [game], too. You should try out [other game]. It's like [game], but better in [these regards]."

Unless you're just an autistic hipster who likes Different Things™ because they're Different©.

>>11098908
There are a LOT of parallels between modern scientific cosmology and ancient Hindu philosophy. It's almost chilling.

>>11100040
I don't play video games (not that poster)
Im not 12 years old anymore (add 10)

>>11100010
I will, thanks

>>11099970
I was with you on the obscurity train until you took it into social pretentiousness town, how about you fucking CONSUME MEDIA FOR YOURSELF

>>11100041
>chilling
Uh. Not really, maybe if you are a completely sheltered individual who never looked at the esoteric seriously.

>>11100010
>I'm a perfect boyfriend
nobody is perfect at anything

>>11100010
This feels bleak. Why couldn't it work with some patience?

>>11100040
I like to mix it up and ask why they like the game, especially if I don't like it at all. You learn a lot that way, and learn some interesting things about things you don't like. And it's easier to recommend things, too.

>>11100050
I mean it's the only major world religion that was founded millennia ago that explains humans are made of immortal star dust and that the universe constantly undergoes death and rebirth. no other religion gets that in-depth with the nature of the cosmos and we're just now figuring it all out through empirical evidence.

>>11100040
>>11100047

If I have to pretend to like stuff I don't, then trying to have friends is pointless to me. Thanks, now I know to not even try anymore.

>>11100067
Okay, and what does this comment have to you being 'surprised'? Like i said no shit, its obvious to any one worth their merit.

>>11100073

You've got the emotional intelligence of an angsty fourteen year old.

>>11099970
You sound like a slightly above average intelligent angsty teen.
Its OK to like stuff that everyone else likes.
Call Me Maybe was a catchy song
Stranger Things is a good show
Liverpool is the best club in the world

Everything doesn't have to be a moment

Any advice for pushing yourself beyond fear to really explore new things? I'm a fairly content young man who isn't overtly mad about life. I just have a lack of fulfillment from most of it. I want the buzzword "passion"

But to find it for myself I'll have to try numerous new hobbies and practices to find the ones I really enjoy. But I never do. I just put it all off. I imagine I do so because I'm afraid to break the routine.

Any advice on how to just throw myself over that speedbump?

>>11100085

No, I just don't see the point of trying to have a relationship with anyone if I have to lie all the time.

>>11100073
I only want to say this to be constructive and don't mean to offend you, but you sound very snobby with your tastes. There's no reason to put other people down for not liking the same obscure things you do. It's one thing to complain people don't enjoy the same things you do, but it's irrational to place yourself as superior for liking some subjects more than most other people.

I fucking love obscure indie games and movies but I don't think I'm better than other people because of it. I just like the feeling of being some sort of treasure hunter and finding a rough-cut diamond that feels like it was made just for me.

>>11100073
>>11100094
if you equate actually putting any effort into a relationship with "pretending to be someone else" and "lying", then you're actually retarded and don't deserve friends. You've missed the point completely, and you don't understand the fundamentals of human interaction.

>>11100084
BECAUSE HINDUISM WAS FOUNDED BEFORE FUCKING TELESCOPES

I wrote a rap and people some to really like it, its not completely done, but it is almost there.
The is the first time Ive felt happy about a piece of mine, its the first I felt like I truely made an original.

Just sharing my emotions, and thoughts
Thanks /lit/

>>11100098

You guys are talking like I go around saying "everything you like is bad". I don't. It's just that if something doesn't interest me, I have nothing to contribute to any conversation in regard to those subjects.

>>11100115
ITS ABOUT INNER REALIZATIONS

Now i know ur memeing me tbqfh I dgt fts. (To be quite fucking honest I dont got time for this shit)

>>11100101
on a more constructive note, human interaction is a two-way street. you say that people have nothing to offer to you because of their tastes. why don't you turn that question around and ask what YOU can offer others that benefits them? the world and its inhabitants are not made for your enjoyment, people are going to like what they like, any healthy human doesn't put serious consideration into what other people really think of them when they like something.

>>11100115
I don't come to /lit/ to have my sides obliterated
but when it happens its amazing

>>11100124
can I ask you is there anything you're curious about in the world specifically?

>>11100120
Post rap

>>11100124
The point is, is that you want relationship with people, but you are completely unwilling to do the very minimum that a relationship requires.
Everybody has likes their friends don't share. One of my friends hates reading- so find them audiobooks of books I liked. All of us have very differing film tastes, so we only go see movies all of us will like, or make deals with each other to watch episodes of our favorite shows. Sometimes we want to do things the other one doesn't, so you compromise. For a while, two of us were super lazy and didn't want to spend any money, and we couldn't agree to which house to meet at, so we just said fuck it and met in the middle. Do you see where I'm going with this? Each of us like our own things and have our own needs and we compromise because we like each other, and sometimes we don't compromise if we don't want to. I'm going to tell you a secret. This changed my life.
You have to adapt or die.
If you want everyone to accept you as you are, without any effort on your part, then you're telling the whole world to change for you. That's not how it works. You don't have to be someone different, but you have to adapt.

>>11099522
My favorite pill desu desu

I don't get SNL. I literally just can't understand the humor. I vaguely remember the last time I watched it there was a skit where these two girls were on stage said 'we're lesbians' and a crowd of people behind them turned around with very smug faces and all said 'that's good' and the crowd laughed. I just don't get it, and I'm baffled it has tens of millions of viewers.

>>11100304
You have autism.

>>11100024
>>11100053
No, I really was good. The only thing I did wrong was really trying to push us together towards the end of the relationship. I didn't know her feelings were gone and I was still trying hard.

>>11100055
She decided that she didn't want to date anymore. She said that she just felt like she was bound to me, and the opportunity to experience other things wouldn't leave her. I don't think she exactly wants to fuck other people, I just think its the classic girl thing where they want to experience life when they're young and settle down when they're older. She's also got some problems going on right now mentally and with anxiety. She's "talking" to this weird ugly fat dude because she thinks he understands her. Its weird shit.

>>11100319
Then how is SNL funny?

>>11100324
>No, I really was good. The only thing I did wrong was really trying to push us together towards the end of the relationship.
again, you're wrong. no one is perfect, and you thinking you were doing everything right is a de facto admission that you weren't paying attention and were doing shit wrong. You even admit it.

>She decided that she didn't want to date anymore.
nobody just "decides" to end a relationship. there's always a reason.
>She said that she just felt like she was bound to me
so you were cloying/controlling in some way
>She's "talking" to this weird ugly fat dude because she thinks he understands her.
obviously because she felt she couldn't talk to you, or that you would understand her
>Its weird shit.
and she was right. you don't understand, and think it's weird.

>>11098908
God loves me, that's why I am still here, I have hope, although I get hate all the time. I get stronger with time.

>>11100427
do you think sminem prays to the big man upstairs

I just a Vex rune and a Bul-Kathos' ring in the space of TEN minutes.

I would be the worst famous author, i'm very unprofessional. If i was interviewed by someone i didn't like i'm 100% certain id eventually call him a faggot during it
I imagine it playing out like a memri-tv debate

>>11100167

Not worth it to me. If I was to adapt, it would be me being a fake. As far as I'm concerned you guys answered my question. All friendships are surface level only. Guess it is time for me to accept I will be alone for the rest of my life.

>>11111111

I was supposed to start cooking an hour ago, be done eating by now and on my way to bed.

>>11100089
https://youtu.be/ZXsQAXx_ao0

>>11101071
So it would be like your average Harlan Ellison interview.

>apply for a job
>send cv and personal letter
>all is going well
>they actually ask for my grades
>I send them, faintly hearing my facade shatter in the background
JUST

>>11101153
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mj5IV23g-fE

>>11101188
Why didn't you just pay attention in class, Anon? You were such a good student in high school!

—your family who probably didn't go to college

I just opened an esquire magazine only to be greeted by Jordan Petterson's stupid fucking face. Is he actually becoming an influential figure?

I translated a German song into a poem and I gave it to three teachers.
One of them said, "Good job, Anon!", another said, "Listen, I don't speak German, but judging by the phonetics of the original text, you neglected almost all form of rhythm in your translation, now, don't jump out the window, it's not that bad, but next time maybe try a raw translation first."
The third hasn't said anything. Probably didn't give a damn.
I should work harder.

>>11101218
Fortunately enough I've learned not to tell them about stuff that have any chance of going wrong.

>>11100130
>people have nothing to offer to you because of their tastes
>people are going to like what they like

>any HEALTHY HUMAN doesn't put serious consideration into what other people really think

Boutta pull a Virgina Woolfe boys

looking forward to seeing how many are absent from my International Relations class on Monday after the exam results were released

>>11101321
yo this nigga finna bouta get weighed down

I think excessive introspection has given me irreparable (it took me 4 tries to spell that) brain damage. Or maybe the alcohol did it. Regardless I'm no longer a functioning human

>>11101071
my unprofessional attitude has helped me so much in sales, customers love it when salespeople don't act like generic white bread fucking yes-men robots and actually have some personality. however you do gather a shitload of ire from upper management for "not properly representing the face of the company" but if you're good enough they'd be retarded to fire you. anyway uh, just a little tidbit i thought i'd share about unprofessional attitude lol

>>11101188
employers that care about grades are stupid as fuck

>>11101416
>employers that care about grades are stupid as fuck
>my unprofessional attitude has helped me so much in sales
I see that you're drowning in job offers

>>11101434
i am

>>11100005
el classico

I'm currently reading a great book that I bought second hand, it was printed 1974 and looks like its age. It's about 250 pages long, and I'm at page 200 right now. Like 10 pages ago I noticed that no one seem to turned the pages this far into the book before, they still stick together close to the spine, like if the book was new.

miss me with that gay shit

This is one of my favorite music videos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPlrKifWwKY

>>11101280

I don't know what you people want from me. No one tries to learn anything about anything I'm interested in, but I'm supposed to go out of my way to learn about their stuff? Where is the "meeting in the middle part"? That's me being forced to meet them with no effort expected on their part.

>>11101077
you are an infuriating dumbass

>>11101841

Obviously you guys have no intention on helping me so I'm done.

>>11101849
you clearly don't want to be helped, so kindly fuck off and think about your goddamn behavior.

>>11098989
Nice

>>11101856

I've done nothing wrong and you guys attack me.

Friendship doesn't exist after high school. Adulthood is a fucking meme that attempts to remove every bit of humanity from a person. How can you have friends when you have to move hundreds or thousands of miles just to get a job or fuck, even an internship? A job that takes up most of the day, and leaves you with very little time at all once you take care of your other responsibilities. It's no wonder that drinking is the major social activity for the adult worker. Further, the system encourages you to treat your companions not as people, but as assets. It's fucking absurd how big "networking" has got, it horrifies me how social interactions have been commodified.

College isn't any better, your friends are either the people you do retarded frat shit with or the people you study / copy answers from / "network" with. In either case, you'll throw them away once you graduate. (Not nominally of course, they may help you land a job at megaco :^) ) The truly terrible thing is that being aware of this doesn't allow you to avoid it, because everyone else you meet is too brainwashed to help themselves. The only exceptions I could think of are the "manchildren" that society derides or the broken losers that fill places like /lit/. And I never meet these people, presumably because they've sequestered themselves away from the world after having similar realizations to me.

I don't understand how this has happened. Our popular culture is filled with good, real friendships and yet our reality is devoid of them. When did this happen, was it with the rise of the digital age? Is it a western thing? When the fuck did it become "good advice" to tell people
>don't put too much into your friends!
FUCK YOU. We're a social species, friendship is as important to us as food or water.

I hope this post isn't too incoherent, I'm just fucking mad and needed to tell someone. I hate this aspect of society so much, I hate that I grow lonelier every day, I hate that every interaction I have feels increasingly fake, I hate that my main source of socialization is similarly jaded anons, I hate that there doesn't seem to be a way out.

I'm begging for someone to prove me wrong. Show me that the world is better than it looks. Show me a path out of this hell.

>>11102147
grow up retard

no but seriously u will make good friends again once you actually put down roots in some city but yeah you probably arent going to have the total mindmeld kind of friendship you did with the kids on your street when u were in grammar school, thats life

>>11102147
>Friendship doesn't exist after high school.
that's why you retain your friendships from high school (or preferably prior). this is the trick to meaningful social relationships, i'm convinced.

friday night time to shitpost!

>>11102147
I mean, the fact that you still want friendships like that is telling that you're not too far gone. The current political climate and my experiences at jobs makes it difficult to not be an insane misanthrope. I met my best friend in college and even though he moved we still talk constantly so I think these things are possible. You're right about the "professional" world though. It's a total mind-numbing, torturous, dehumanizing process designed to instill a faux-moral idea of loyalty and work ethic. It's a darkly comic situation where being a sleazy slacker who cheats the system for self-gain is in the right.

>>11102165
unless you went to high school at exeter academy or like dalton are you sure you really wanna stay friends with a buncha plebs?

tfw didn't make friends in high school
tfw don't have those decade-long relationships
tfw have no trouble making friends, but can't keep friends for shit
tfw will grow old and lonely because my wife will be my only friend

Had a dream that my best friend started dating my ex who I'm really not over even after a pathetic amount of time
Anyone wanna psychoanalyze me? It kinda fucked my day up

>>11102208
>predicating friendships on common interests
these are doomed to a premature demise. the truest friendships involve a mutual appreciation of each other's character. aristotle got it right.

>>11102224
my opposite, i have meaningful, long-lasting friendships but cannot forge new ones and will probably remain a bachelor for life.

>>11102259
so u think the kids who happened to sit in your row in high school are the best exemplars of character you can find in life? u must have a mighty stunted life

ok now the question on my mind is should i have a nice long fap for a couple hours or should i try to do some productive shit, idk

>>11102234
You're insecure, but I'm sure you already knew that. Probably also somewhat jealous. That's all I could get from the information you gave.

>>11102174
I SLEPT FOR THREE HOURS LAST NIGHT AND WORKED A TEN AND A HALF HOUR SHIFT TODAY, THAT'S WHY I'M SHITPOSTING, IT'S NOT BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE FRIENDS OR ANYTHING TO DO TONIGHT, I COULD GO OUT IF I WANTED, OK?

>>11098908
I should read a book.

>>11102306
Is there any book you want to read?

Becoming a more devout Catholic has made me fully understand the psychology of the men who fought in the Crusades and the Wars of Religion. There are moments when I feel like I could fight and kill for the truth of my religion, also. I can't imagine how much more intense that feeling was at the end of the Middle Ages.

>>11102279
friendships cultivated at particularly young ages inextricably impress principles and characteristics upon both parties. this is why your earliest friendships tend to remain your most robust, provided you manage to maintain them for a sufficient period of time. when it comes to my friends, i'm not saying they're the objective heights of moral excellence, but they are genuinely concerned with my well-being and our relationships are built upon productive rather than toxic foundations. couple that with the fact that their sensibilities are most amenable to mine, and i therefore find the most virtue in their characters, and hopefully vice versa.

>>11102316
I have books I want to read/in the middle of reading, but have no real drive to do so right now. Bit tired and feel like sleeping, but I am a few chapters away from finishing a book so I feel I should finish it. I also feel that if I try to read it now I might just trail off and not fully digest anything from it.
All the while posting and reading posts on here is just taking time away from sleeping and reading.

>>11102296
Yeah I pretty much knew that already
He has a gf who we were both friends with before who I have 0 interest in romantically or even sexually to be honest but still when we all hang out I feel a void and I think they can tell. Also yeah insecure fits, why else would I be on 4channel.biz

>>11098908
I live on the road, more specifically out of my car. Mostly I just spend my time reading or hiking. I was wondering, would anyone like to join me? Like a sort of rolling writer's guild/caravan dealie?

>>11102346
Go to sleep and finish the book tomorrow morning.

>>11102361
I would join you if my life fell to shit

>>11102361
What are your travel plans, if you have any? Also please don't murder me if we meet up

>>11102376
I don't have a lot of big plans. I want to check out a bunch of restaurants, hike (particularly around the pacific northwest), beautiful libraries, museums, just a bunch of stuff I loved doing as a kid.

I care but I shouldn't
I have little victories but they pass
I try to understand but I'm at a loss

>>11102449
I'll be spending the middle and end of July in the PNW, then moving on through North Idaho wilderness, spending a week or so there, then heading down to Provo, UT. So if you're going to be anywhere in that general area around that time post in one of these threads, or something. That stuff sounds not unpleasant.

>>11102165
I tried anon, I really did. But every year they grow further and further from me.

>>11098974
I think this is one of the most sincere stories I've read in this threads so far. I lurk almost everyday expecting something like this.
Than you, anon. Godspeed you, your wife and that lady.

>>11098908
fuck school. god, let these last weeks end fast. i want to draw and write freely again

>>11098908
V E I N S O B S T R U C T E D B Y D E M O N S , N E R V E S E A T I N G G R A V E S

>>11099346
Why don't just download them?

>>11103401
lol you think this is real? lurk more

>>11098989
me too; I would also assume most of us are too 0.0

>>11098908
i put together an ikea bookshelf the wrong way. i mixed up the left and the right side so there's more space on top than my other 3 matching bookshelves. this intensely triggers my OCD but it's too late to do anything because i already put the 50 nails for the backboard in and i'd have to buy another bookshelf. it still holds books but god fucking dammit it looks just slightly off

>>11100304
>I don't get SNL.
It's been neutered garbage since Farell's last days. SNL is in a van, down by the Comedic river Styx. Put it down. Let it die.

>>11101071
>I would be the worst famous author, i'm very unprofessional.
You have what it takes. In the Corporate World Soviet, people don't want to be faced with "méi bàn fǎ" from yet another god damn drone. If the Fat Thrones Fuck can get away with it, so can you.

>>11101228
>I just opened an esquire magazine only to be greeted by Jordan Petterson's stupid fucking face. Is he actually becoming an influential figure?
In a world of untidy sleeping quarters, feng shui is a revolutionary schtick. 60k a month in patreon subscribers don't lie.

>>11101229
>I don't speak German, but judging by the phonetics of the original text,
1:1 phonetics/metre is added value, not a Bed of Procrustes to autiste over; the strength of the poetry of those you're soliciting needs to be the primary consideration when filtering their criticism. Translation is alchemy, and bad ones are impaired by the uninitiated status of their would-be magicians. That one is right about there being a set of morphemic and semeiotic algorithms within which a faithful attempt will fall more within than without.

>>11102147
>provincial rivalry removed, one big ant hill
Freedom of movement in individuals and capital facade. Turns out we're adapted to a first name basis in-group of around 500 before it becomes nameless faces in the crowd. Find your tribe, and reinforce it with ritual, shared tasks.

dude i was havin a nice friday fap sess browsin tranny porn and i came across a goldmine, usually i browse xhamster cuz they have a dedicated shemale section so u know no matter how hot a chick is she def got a dick, sometimes pornhub will mix cisgendered thots and hookers with recommended videos for amateur trannys of color...but today for whatever reason i got started with pornhub so i was like fuck it ill just go with it and i was going through the usual tranny escorts, natalie la porta, kayla ko, etc. i like their low budget videos with clients gives it a raw authenticity those overproduced trans500 shits dont have, and i came across "she malez n da hood 3 scene 03" or something, naturally i clicked on it, dude, it was the full scene of some old vhs or maybe dvd video from the 90s with sort of bad lighting and video effects from the 90s, so hot, so i checked out what else the user had uploaded "metropolis" was his name, he had so many old school classics like shemale samba mania! all full scenes too no edits, for so many millenials that was one of the first tranny pornos that really made the rounds on irc xdcc bot channels etc. it used to be hard af to find tranny shit for real, but there were so many on his channel, many i hadn't heard of, one of them had sick vaporwave vibes really givin u that 90s experience back when wackin off still made u feel a little guilty and embarrassed, but also hotter, idk, also some of them had like thigh high hooker boots and penciled on eyebrows like a tranny hooker u might see by port authority before guiliani, idk tranny porn these days rarely is this good, the pornhub user "trannymafia" who does those tranny hoodrat dvds is keeping it alive, but most of the commercial tranny porn these days sucks, not to mention half of them have that fucking "ramon" guy who looks like junot diaz but with a big ass dick, really takes u out of it, the old 90s where just anonymous brazilian studs and longdick black bucks, plus imagine how much balls it took to transition to a tranny in like 1998 before where u can piss was a presidential election year issue and shit, shout out to all the sexy ass tranny thots of yesteryear

His mandibles clicked as he saw the sun crest the horizon.

the best part about 90s pornos is they are usually in some normal house in the suburbs like some shit your uncle could live in, if they have a scene by a pool that's gettin fancy, now every porno is in a god damn mansion or if its a pool scene its like a pool in beverly hills or some shit that costs a million bucks

>>11098971
Who the fuck uses straws instead of rolled up 20's (or five's in my case)?

>>11103618
when are they going to legalize coke, why cant some iraq war vet claim it helps his ptsd or some coal miner with a bad back can tell trump it helps work hard to beat the chinese, etc.

Pop music is disgusting now resorting to singing over done to death F G Am C chords

Female empowerment is the stupidest term on the planet I still don't understand it or misogyny. Who the fuck hates their mom?

The Toronto killer's last facebook post reads fake and trollish as hell. The guy who made the post may as well have signed off with a wink emoticon

Muslims have better pop music than the west, sorry, this guy is the Josh Groben of the mid east and his melodies sound like deicide on a bad day

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XcikV4gcPzo

>>11103633
I'm a former /pol/tard who's been chilling out, but even I have to admit that richer Muslims have some fucking slick style. I love those satin shirts and the colognes the dudes at my uni wear are fucking dope. That song is breddy gud too but I was expecting more of a crescendo desu.

>>11103658
depends on where they from, egyptians tend to just dress like a fuckin cab driver, but dudes from morocco always got flair, like peacoats and loafers and shit, probably the french influence

Deep down I'm actually incredibly lonely and all of the intellectual posturing and self-obsessed hobbies I have are all ways of coping by either distraction or pretending that I'm actually above it. If someone would show a genuine interest in me I'm sure the majority of the motivation I have for pursuing these interests would vanish.

>>11103767
tell me about yourself, my dude

The cathedral was monstrous, it looked as if it could hold a small village within, and it might have some ages ago. The rays of light cutting through the clouds struck the structure, glimmering were the gilded accents and ornamentation beckoning memories of grandeur, the culmination of lifetimes of conception, construction and completion. It must have once been filled with the pious and priestly, believers of a great faith, but no more. It’s only congregation was that of the forest. Trees, grass, flowers, creatures of the air and earth. Beneath that veneer of tranquility is something deadly, beauty concealing doom. For whoever ventured in would surely be swallowed into it’s unseen darkness.

>>11103618
>>11098971

The patrician choice is the shell of a disassembled inkpen. Money is filthy, rolls can be loose, and straws are too narrow. Ink pens have the perfect dialeter for inhalation.

>>11099073
Sounds really, really hot.

>the proper way to respond to "how do you do?" is to say "how do you do?" back because it isn't actually a question
what in the goddamn

>>11104040
don't allow normies to get away with this shit, always give them a detailed rundown of your day and your current life situation

>>11104040
>what in the goddamn
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKS7tdNkHOM

Nothing excites me anymore.

It's really weird being in a position where nobody will talk to me about anything even though I'm pretty sure I'm not saying anything fundamentally unreasonable.

Thread got pruned. Posting here to further the charade....

---

>>11105157
>>11105142
Imagine believing both of these aren't true and we aren't capable of compartmentalising various competitive anxieties engaged by our poly-ideological worshipping minds, capable of holding these anxieties about competition along with some personal narratives we hold about interpersonal relations in competition activities. An agent is first and foremost acting from dissonant conceptions of reality, and the complexity cannot be observed but only coerced to favour one signal translation over the other.
>>11105175
The competitiveness of the left is best utilised in mass and is the best driver of the lefts subjugation by markets seeking to fulfil their desire for infantalization, empathy, and security. Technological fear-mongering is a good market that will always be worth selling into, and the inter-dimensional parasite will always hiss in relation to my awareness, information bracketed and under authority of an infinite negation. While it is true that technology/capital overpowers us because it remains on a time scale persevering in pleasant antagonism well after the individual has time to understand that statistics of human birthrates linked to culture affect moral decision making at a pragmatic level, especially of those that like to play football.
---
Stone over paper where once it was paper over stone.

>>11099355
I've grown to enjoy superficial friendships. I'm uncomfortable with people knowing too much about me. I have someone who I was close to but I haven't talked to him in several months.

Now that I think about it, it's weird to realize sometimes how different things can be.
Yesterday I went into the city with around ~10 dollars and when I spent it all on books and tea, I realized, holly molly, I just spent it all, and I'm out of money, there is nothing else for me to do here now, since everything requires money, let's go home instead.
10 dollars is nothing for an American. 10 dollars is nothing for someone in the west.
The contrast made me think, but I haven't gotten to a conclusion yet.

>>11099769
>>11099923
Yes. It's frustrating to pour your heart into something and get canned praise from people who you know have no sense of taste or quality scaling. It's insulting to see people say they love your characterization or your prose and then turn around and say the same thing towards someone who can barely string a sentence together. It's tiring to be stuck in a sphere where the mildest of critical feedback so often results in getting screamed at by some lunatic with a papier-mâché ego that people won't give it even when you ask for it.

The ceaseless praise of mediocrity is the death of quality.

I'm totally alone but pretty happy about my life.
I like waking up early, working out, reading and living according to pretty strict routines.
My future doesn't look half bad and I'm quite satisfied with the way things are going, even though I'm the most boring person you could ever meet by conventional standards.

It's been four years since I started working as a financial engineer, two of my tasks that are particularly bothering me consist of taking care of tax evasion paperwork for clients and optimizing their resources use (which a lot of times implies moving businesses offshore), my job makes me extremely depressed and I haven't gone a single day in the past years without thinking about killing myself.

>>11105849
I'm boring too, but my future looks bleak and I can't be satisfied by anything in life. How to enjoy being alive

You'd be doing us a great favor if you just offed yourself, fucking leech
I don't care how educated or well payed you are, you are far worse than a NEET since not only do you not provide anything productive, but you're actively undermining your country's working class with your pathetic "job"

I'm so bored
I spend my days reading, and I do long sessions because time flies when you get deep into a book and don't have a clock to look at. I've had 3 hour reading sessions lately. I'm doing this to eat away time from the day.
Another thing I do a lot is nap, I nap usually every day, hardly tired, just trying to make the day go by faster
I don't know why I do this, I have nothing to look forward to. No friends, nothing to do.
I think I do it as a way to try and get closer to some event, even though no such event exists.
Every weekend I think as if I'm gonna do a lot of fun stuff and go out, but I never do, I spend it as I've spent the last weekend, reading and sleeping and browsing 4chan. I don't know what to do, I'm without meaning and I hate it

>>11105975
meant for >>11105850

>>11101434
There's more to sales than just retail.

>>11101195
Thanks based Ellison.

>>11101321
Still alive?

>>11101351
>Or maybe the alcohol did it.
It was the alcohol.

>>11101600
What a nice feel.

I’ve gotten a strange graduation present, an envelope full of letters, from friends and family. Each telling me why they love me, how I’ve effected them and how I’ll do great things. I moved my senior year, all those people live so goddamn far. Have you ever been split between tears and joy?

/lit/ has driven the purple proser critanon around the bend. All week he's been trying to exact revenge. Now he's reduced to posting traps until he runs out of proxies. Many such cases. Sad.

>>11105947

I'd suggest working out the basics first so your future wouldn't look so bleak.
Think as logically and detached as possible about what your minimal necessities will be in the future and what your options are (careerwise, moving to another city/country, studying for a job which is in high demand, etc.). Then if you decide on something of which you're confident you can realistically achieve, consider what you would like to have or do besides these absolute necessities. Then go over what you would have to do to get these. Then weigh everything and choose whatever you want.

This approach works if you're able to focus on what you know is necessary, rather than on desires or fantasies. Drop the latter. And don't try to enjoy, do what you think you have to do (according to your own rationale, not someone else's) and what you think is right.
After a while you'll just learn to appreciate the trivialities of everyday life and you'll be content.

what's on your mind

>>11098908
normalfags are evil without a doubt. i went out last night and every second sentence was lascivious or disparaging towards some other person absent from the get-together. Extreme dishonesty with humor, blatant social gaming to get sex and drugs throughout the night, women flaunting their sex lives while trying to pretend to groundedness that they betrayed with constant partaking in hyena-like assaults on whoever was being “dude ROASTED”

evil evil evil

they are not worth fighting for, I wish no goodness or evil upon them, but the average human is fallen entirely into vision machine consciousness. 90% of their time was spent on their phone or talking shit, craving cheap food, trying to get cigarettes, coke, pills.

pathetic people.

just got home from work, my anus has been pinched all day trying to hold all these turds, now i can release

>>11106023
>giving an envelope full of "letters of encouragement" instead of cold hard cash

sounds like your friends and family are cheapasses

>>11106256
I’ve gotten money in the cards you dimwit, that’s not the point. The point is they sat down a wrote a letter. An honest to god letter. You’re spoiled if you think money and gifts are all that matter because your material possessions are the only thing that give proof that people give a shit about you.

Wish I hadn't decided to fast. Wish this acne on my face would go away once and for all. Wish I could go eat some maltesers. Wish I don't cave in to the temptation because I'll feel like shit after it. Wish I still smoked cigarettes, that would be a good way to get my mind off things. Just wish I had something that brought me pleasure.

>>11106159
Helping protestants enjoy life has got to be the most depressing job in the world. Luckily there is alcohol and drugs and poetry on nature.

>>11106251
Tell us about your pooping experience after.

>>11106368
Read a book.

>>11106429
I am. Currently reading Crime and Punishment. However I also have a final project I have to complete for university so I'm stuck in the 4chan limbo trying to procrastinate.

>>11106368
Go to a fucking dermatologist.

>>11106467
I have. For 2 years I have been taking pills and rubbing creams on my face daily and it never resulted in any change.

>>11106487
haha faggot

I found him
The man who will be my main character. See my book is about a happy incel, and I found just the person on the train today. His hairline thinning, his fashion horrible, and his body unappealing. Yet he was striking conversations with people on the subway, and was quite jovially about it. I have decided that this man will be my main character

>>11106751

Would you consider a cameo from me, friend? I am the Raz to your raz-ma-tazy character.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYnVYJDxu2Q

>>11104065
I always reply with a very blunt, cold "Mediocre" and then move away from small talk.

>>11105850
Never commit suicide. If you're willing to give up everything, you have plenty of opportunities. Try to burn out instead of euthanizing yourself.

For example: try gathering as much dirt on the company as possible, then relocate somewhere discrete and blackmail your former company and clients for as much as you can bleed them for.

I swear to god. Be a fucking outlaw. The stress will give you purpose, the adrenaline will give you a will to live.

What are some tips to improve my writing/exercises and stuff i could do? I'm not writing a novel or have ambitions to be a writer or anything like that, so not in that sense just a general one.

Its been so long since I've actually had any friends that I have completely forgotten what its like. I don't find this to be a particularly sad thing.

>>11104065
lol i'm not normie at all but i'd always smirk to myself when i'd say "whatsup" to chicks and they'd start telling me what they're literally up to, like "oh have to finish my paper but then i'm thinking about going into the city, blah blah" its like its just a greeting i dont need to know your whole weekend plans

>>11098908
I'm an alcoholic drug addict. Since the start of the new year, where my daily drinking habits really kicked in, I've been on a downward slope of racism, anger, loneliness and abuse. I've also been doing coke on a semi-regular to regular basis. I haven't been one hundred per cent sober for more than a week in for probably ten years. Some days I hate life, others I don't. But all I know is I'm on the downward slope to 30, single, alone, in massive amounts of debt, been laid a bunch but never had a gf, no real future prospects and very seriously mad at the world I live in.

If you haven't guessed it by now, I also think about myself and my place in the world constantly.

Is copying greentext stories plagiarism?

hipster always seemed hip and cool when they where over there in brooklyn, you'd see a guy with a moustache, big ass glasses and some nut crushing jeans and be like "woah i bet he has great taste in vinyl!" with a bit of envy as he strolls out of the fair trade coffee shop, but when you see mother fuckers walk around your own neighborhood you know they probably never listened to death grips discography and probably have a couple beat books at most, and you're just like that moustache does not hide that fact that you are a boring white male from the suburbs without the will to fulfill middle class white destiny of yuppiness, but since your dad is only a dentist instead of a hedge fund manager you can't afford brooklyn and have to move next to me. i don't like it. last time i was at a bar with some "hip" assholes one guy looked like axl rose and kept trying to stump with vocabulary words none of which were obscure i'm like i guess somebody didnt get legacy admissions to yale, and then some other nerd dressed like a farmer kept going on about star wars lore like anyone gives a shit, i should have put a paragraph between brooklyn and here but who cares

I just got straight b's in school this semester. It's my last semester of grad school. It drags me down from about a 3.6 to a 3.4. One of the classes showed that I had an 89.15%, but that isn't counting our presentations, which I was never shown a grade for. It's possible she marked me down for those, but if she did it's bullshit since it's the one thing she never gave me feedback on.

I sent her a bunch of emails hoping for a correction, but I'm furious. I don't know what do do with myself.

>>11107205
I know this is pretty cliche but have you tried acid? It helped me quit doing drugs

>>11107269
yeah acid ruined weed for me now if i smoke i get all the extreme paranoid delusions of acid plus hardcore depression, but without any of the visuals, now i don't get why anyone would smoke weed by choice, the shit is like a punishment

Is this real life?

>>11107309
Is this fantasy?
>probably a little of both

>>11107300
I had a similar experience but with DMT

The first time I really tripped on DMT I thought I was at a party with loads of people staring at me while I overdosed on some unknown drug

now the thought of doing most drugs makes me anxious and smoking weed just makes it worse

>>11107205
Go volunteer at an animal shelter. Appreciate your protoplasmic drift through life while petting dogs.

>>11107300
Granted I never tried coke so I can't really relate, but from my understanding that stuff rewires your brain to seek it out and rationalize seeking it out so it might be harder to quit. Is quitting drugs something you want to do?

>>11107331
oh ya true coke is physically addictive in a way other shit isn't, but if u do enough acid it will smash your ego to the point that you won't even want to bother with whatever "self-medicating" bullshit you were doing to keep up your facade

>>11107341
Describes pretty well what happened to me

>>11099896
>Join a writing club
any recommendations?

posting your thoughts in a thread is not literature

>>11103485
You think it isn't?
>implying it's important at all

when a book is too long is scares me

>>11107688
its a containment thread. these threads most likely improve the quality of the rest of this board.

>>11107803
just posting my thoughts

>>11106487
Try just moisturising
Worked for me

>>11106487
I've been using all that stuff for years as well, did nothing for me. Is it possible to be bored out of an insecurity? I think i've had this acne for long enough now that i honestly haven't got the energy to feel insecure about it anymore. are you embarrassed by it?

>>11104040
>>11104065
the thing is it also doesn't make sense interpreted literally
how do you do... what, exactly? there's no object in that sentence
not only is it not a question, it's not what it looks like, it's a fixed phrase, it's an idiom

I got spider on my doors and I don't know hot to kill him effectively, he is hidden behind my backpack. I can't go to sleep knowing he is near
I'm a fucking pussy

>>11107907
i skimmed over the first and last parts of your post and somehow got the idea that it was about hot spider action

>>11107930
tell me how to kill him I can't think lucidly now

>>11107936
Get a cup and paper or convince the spider that it’s you and it should accordingly kill itself

>>11107936
did you try making friends with it?

I want to do productive things but I just sit on 4chan all day gathering information about said things, never improving.

>>11107993
cold turkey is your only hurp

i just wrote that, didn't i? gotta go to sleep

>>11108007

I should get drunk and play my guitar?

>>11108013
sounds like a good night

>>11107815
My hair and face get incredibly oily Im not sure that is a good solution. I already use moisturizing cream with benzoyl peroxide anyways

>>11107822
Yes, very much so. I feel like nature branded me as a virgin for the world to see. It completely kills my confidence.

Why is Updike revered as a prose stylist? I've been reading some of his short stories (from the collection titled "the Afterlife") this week as my first exposure to him. I would describe his prose as good but nothing too special. The esoteric vocabulary I appreciate. Any attempts at psychologizing seem amateurish. Moreover, most of his protagonists have a dull persona to the point of being interchangeable, and I am having almost no luck identifying major themes.

>>11098908

I can't think anymore. I can't think. Fucking goddamnit.

>>11108168
Don’t worry Anon, a lotta people can talk without thinking. Why how do you think Ricky Gervias can speak.

>>11108187

No, I mean, I'm irreparably schizo and it's made me retarded. I can't remember anything and I can't think real trains of thought anymore. Everything I say and do is wrong somehow but I'm too stupid to know how anymore. And the worst part is nobody will talk to me so I can't even use others as a frame of reference.

>>11108203
You seem to be coherent right now.

>>11108226

lol

I think 2018 will be it for me lads. I tried my hardest, honest, but it wasn't quiet enough. I always liked to imagine my life as a series of dramatic events, but now they're over. I never thought about what would happen after, and now I'm living it. Stagnation. I don't think there's much more I can see that I haven't already beheld. With that future and regrets piled higher than ever before, what good does it do me?

Who knows, maybe something will change. I won't hold my breath though.

i think i never bother trying to get laid anymore because my room is a fucking mess and probably smells like ass and i don't feel like cleaning it plus the walls are paper thin and i dont want everybody hearing my awkward sexual encounters

>>11108450
sorry

>>11108450
You sound like someone in one of those ridiculous live television skit shows from the fifties who standing in front of an audience saying sad and dramatic shit for sympathy, but then automatically turns around and is whisked away by some new turn of events. It's a boring gag, but even worse over an entire book where the end is the last redemption. That shit sucks for a viewing experience unless you don't see it coming. But it's usually so ridiculously easy to see the themes and ideas. Putting energy in to negative patterns of thought and not for pleasure is just sad.
Good luck.
>>11108560
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhaRkWfaq10
Wake up. Clean. Get friends. Find booty.

>>11107773
I cri

>>11108815
oh shit luv me some holy fuck they always have the raddest videos

peep this, mainstream but still kinda fun

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhoATZ1Imtw

I just want somebody to love me

>>11099362
Wow this is amazing

I need a crutch of some kind, always. It used to be cigarettes, but now there's something missing in my life.

Also:
I'm loveless and unloveable.

>>11105979

>I think I do it as a way to try and get closer to some event, even though no such event exists.

You can create such an event. Heres a how-to list:

> 1 stop smoking

>2 find a work out you like

>3 eat appropriate amounts of quality food


>4 find a job that you don't hate


>5 take good care of your skin, hair and clothes. everyday.


>6 don't listen to yourself think too much. when you do, write it down. don't think as often, and think better.


>6.5 read at appropriate times. before bed is good. PUT COMPUTER AWAY AT NIGHT.


>7 pick up another hobby. join the chess club. do it. you will meet nerds. you will become a real nerd. you want that.

>7 stop minding your own business. become a flashier version of yourself. make yourself interesting to yourself. think of yourself as a character in a sandbox simulation. In a way, that's what you are.

>8 give less of a fuck about your own feelings.

>9 start by following the list.

>10 talk to women at any chance you get until you are good at it. sleep with girls you think are skanks. do stupid things and think about said things later.
>11 drink a lot of water
Good luck jack.

>>11108843
try cheeseburgers

>>11108913
I'm too beautiful so far.

Any other suggestion? Please.

>>11108036
I GOT THE SOLUTION FO YOU, BOY.

I'm not kidding.

FOLLOW THE KOOK'S ONE TRUE TIP TO BECOME EXACTLY WHAT YOU'VE ALWAYS DREAMED OF BEING, BOY:

>Ready? Here it comes:


Travel through America, lone, unwashed, equipped only with the necessary gear. Sleep in your tent and walk EVERYDAY.
This has done what no other BULLSHIT ACNE PRODUCT could do to my skin: cure it.

What's stopping you? You'd turn your life around. What you're doing now is straight up useless. You're better than THAT. YOU'RE BETTER THAN THAT. GOD DAMN IT, BOY. YOU DESERVE A NORMAL SKIN. YOU DESERVE A GOOD ALLURE.

WALK, BOY. Walk, and see! And don't FEAR the WALK, BOY!

>>11100073
I won't lie to you like the p-zombie niggers anon, you have to mold a mask, never take it off save for moments of intimacy with the opposite sex and alone at home. You cannot show even the most cursory elements of your real Self to the world, people will abuse, exploit, ruin, infect and deform them. Just pretend to be someone else. You won't feel self-betrayal after the hundreth instance of false consciousness. There is no way out, the hive is too strong, people are so awful and violent, you just have to be something that they want. Try to be consistent but subtle, you will get away with this for decades. Adults are unbelievably shallow retards, they don't notice this kind of inconsistency at all.
>>11101326
what a joke, those classes are so simple. the whole degree would be a free accolade if it wasn't so soul sucking and the bugs weren't so irritating
>>11102147
nope all correct, you are right to feel the way you do, there is nothing here that is incoherent.

>>11108843
>>11108921
Have you considered doing something productive compulsively? It's almost as good as smokes.

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJQnL4ZzFFU

this is the last good boilerroom set and it was already like a month ago

"I enjoy marijuana," he said, grinning.

Damn Christposters on here won't give me any recommendations about Distributivism and Solidarism

>>11109007
>doing something productive

I think my actual problem is that I'm slowly rebuilding the neural connexions in charge of concentrating and taking action -- after taking out the middleman, smokes. It's been difficult to focus. When I smoked, I was as productive as can be, 25h a day. It even delayed my sleeping hours.

Also, at this point in my life, I don't know what to focus on. I've been so lonely. Smoking was my truest companion, yet I'm glad it's gone.

I've been unable to write.

On the flip side, things have been getting better and better with time as the last two months progressed. I've been composing music.

But moments like earlier, when I wrote the message you replied to, still happen every night.

Thanks. Have a great night.

>>11099461
uni is the ultimate meme.

>>11109061
I dropped out of uni after a week.

Considering going back since in my society, in terms of alternative money making, there is FUCK ALL for me (since I'm relatively STUPID). :)

>>11109061
>Said the worthless NEET

>>11109071
Just kidding actually, I'm a creative genius (and my parents are almost rich enough to support me entirely for the next 26 years).

Jokes ;p

>>11109074
Be nice, Bernard.
TAKE A WALK, Bernard.

>>11109071
Wrong. I easily make more than a friend of mine who's a chemical engineer at the same company for a year and a half, and I just started. Putting in the little time and effort required for certification in a trade is so much better. You won't end up spending most of your time and energy on a job you hate, your job is relatively secure, and for the most part you will never be "out of work." Morticians, electricians, and plumbers never have to worry about there not being anyone who needs their services. And if you are into literature or philosophy, you're much better studying that on your own, anyway, provided you aren't a degenerate without a functioning faculty of judgment

>>11098908
why do I break down so easily? Just talking to two people at once puts me into a suicidal mess. ahhhhhhh

>>11109093
I think I agree with you, but I ((believe)) I'm far too superior to work any mundane job for most of my waking time.

I'd rather create something useful for the world and/or manking (either an object, should it be software or hardware, or a work of art that sustains me), and, if and when this terrible plan fails, live a very difficult life in the forests. Not a joke, what do you think?

>>11109124
Please ignore my stupid typos, english is FOURTH language (jokes :p)

>>11109124
>I'm far too superior to work any mundane job for most of my waking time.
Well, I'll tell you this, so you know, Faulkner claimed to have written Sanctuary in six weeks while working twelve hour shifts.
>I'd rather create something useful for the world and/or manking (either an object, should it be software or hardware, or a work of art that sustains me), and, if and when this terrible plan fails, live a very difficult life in the forests. Not a joke, what do you think?
I think this is a joke, or the fantasy of someone who has never had to work to live.

>>11109103
Let me GO the fuck OFF on a whim here: you might lack a BIT of self confidence, UH? HUH?!

Not trying to be agressive, here, bear with me, here, okay, bud?
>Maybe you feel stuck in a living situation from which you see no way out. Maybe, here, I'm saying MAYBBBBBEEEEEEE, okay, MAYBE, you're feeling a little demoralized!
>Maybe you've set standards you feel you can't/can no longer MEET!(???)

>Maybe speaking OUT TO PEOPLE JUST AIN'T YOUR FORTE! :D MAYBE your FORCE lies ELSE-ware.


Low self-confidence is NOT AT ALL limited to but can be onset by "relationship" troubles with people that you feel love you and that you love but YOU'RE so FAR OUTTTT YO' ZONE, BRO! THAT they can't understand The Real YouTM.


YEAH, bitch! :P

You will always be met with resistance if ever you try to straight up change your situation. >GOOD NEWS!

>There might be options for you, here, bud!
>Don't give up! You deserve to be happy, YES, YOU, DO!

I'M not PREACHING here, BUd!
I'M PREACHING TO THE CHOIR, Buddy !
>People like you. You're organic. You're true to yourself! IT'S SO VERY HARD, in this fucked up world, to be TRUE to yourself, but you try!

>MISTAKES HAVE BEEN MADE . TM

> DO not Worry About Them Ok?

>Everyone has those.

> WE ARE THE


Anyways, yeah, I'm just letting you know, your problem will go away with time, okay? Someone loves you.
OR
Someone will love you. Always. It'll be ME. FIND ME!
>Sport

>>11109137
>I think this is a joke, or the fantasy of someone who has never had to work to live.


Not too far off on both points, there, lad!

Life is sad and stupid.

>>11109179
Not if you make it something else.

I live in a CIA prison. A nigger runs my prison. In prison, the nigger tries
to torment me. We can take away his knives by confessing, every day. In about
2000, I masturbated fantacizing about my niece, Lani. She looks like Star Trek
Seven of Nine! In 1985, at my sister's wedding, I stuck my crotch on the hot
tub drain because it kinda sucked. In 1985, I tried to get a dog to lick my
dick. From 1998-2003, I fantacized about leading a Catholic army like Dune, of
Mexicans or Brazilians? That was dumb because they're niggers. In 2003, I
played tag with a black girl about 7-years-old. She reached for my crotch. In
high school, in the library, Carlos and I said 'juicy' or 'toxic' as a way of
evaluating girls. In 1988, I cheated on my SAT by talking in the hall during
the break -- two problems. On 9/9/1999, I killed a CIA nigger on purpose with
my car. :-) In 1982, when I was 12, I babysat Kevin's kids. I changed a diaper
because I thought that was being professional. In 1975, when I was about age
five, my brother, Keith, put my penis in a vacuum. In 1977, when I was about
age seven, my brother, Danny, got me high on gas fumes and we sucked each
other's dicks. Dr. Tsakalis had an oddly round ass. Paul Keck at Xytec had an
oddly round ass. Distracting? At about age five, Jay Weinrick and I touched
dicks to each other's assholes.

>>11107182
great job asshole, then just say "hey"

>>11109186
Fuck your mind, buddy.

>>11109185
Life has made me sad and stupid and so I cannot make it anything else.

>>11107936
spray it with window cleaner until it stops trying to run away. scream if necessary.

>>11109186
I'll teach you to pull the trigger

>>11109195
>Believing in something like that.

See a psychiatrist, bud.

>I know what it's like to have a hard time, and to want to kill myself very much, and not doing it, but only because I knew I wouldn't miss.

So, I killed myself in another way.
I killed my sad self. I thought: I am a new man, who has nothing to do with that man.
I have no friends left. I don't do any of the things I did. I burned my art, and everything I wrote. I stopped smoking, and shaved my fucking head.

I love you.

>>11109186

>>11109207
>he believes in psychiatry
toplel may as well pray for better horoscopes

>>11109207
There's no need to kill yourself when you're dying all the time. Lose your dreams and you will lose your mind.

>>11109235
Sorry, absolutely meant psychologist.
That being said:
>Not believing in medication for mental health.
Why not? There's proof and testament that it works for some.

>>11109239

I know you're nowhere as lost as you've made yourself believe you are. Your anxious self is more restricted by bad habits than you can actually conceive.
I know it's difficult, but you'll have to trust me on this one. Your happiness is in my hands now, so no pressure on you, okay?

Here's how you'll do it:
>Dealing with one issue at the time.

This is no nonsense. Some things are buried, but you know what you need to change. No need to change it all at once. One guilty pleasure/torture at a time.

>Eradicating bad thoughts.

Once you've located where the bad comes from, you're free to eradicate the negative aspect of it. This is a difficult step, granted.

Basically, you have the power to pinpoint your bad memory/bad habit and deal with it, using your very own (FREE) MINDPOWER. The objective is to see it in a different way. For example: you were raped. Damn, that sucks. I'm sorry, man.
BUT: it wasn't your fault. Ignore it, don't replicate it: BOOM, you're free to go.

ANOTHER EXAMPLE: All those failed social interactions:

Happens to everyone. No one remembers. Moving on.

LAST EXAMPLE:

YOUR DREAMS HAVE BEEN CRUSHED.
They're hurt, they're unrealisable, but they're not gone. ADAPT!!!
>Adapt

I think you can manage to adapt that dream you had, which was ideal, to a more pragmatic and realisable approach, which will probably be even better than you thought, and will DEFINETELY earn you a lot of respect.
LAST STEP:

>No longer putting stress on your shoulders.

>Thinking


I fucking love you, man. Don't worry, honest, you're here. You're a sentient being on this spaceship we have. Even homeless people can live happily. You're okay, man. Go crazy, you're fine!

>>11109167
What?

>>11109299
Just trying to be very nice to someone, well? What what?

>>11109310
Thanks for tryin

>>11109314
For one I love you, don't give up, don't give in, never let them bring you down, they don't deserve you, plenty of fish in the sea, money isn't everything, avoid a cure that is worse than a disease, better late than never, when people care for you and cry for you, they can straighten out your soul, I love you, take care of yourself, don't worry.

Work is sex. Play is sex. Society is sex. Individuality is sex. Love is sex. Hate is sex. Life is sex.

>>11109336
u need some foucault in ur life

damn it i've done it again, it's 3:40 in the morning, and i've shitposted another day away, to be fair i did work this morning, and did a little half-assed kettlebell workout, but still

>>11109362
Shit, happens, man. Prepare your clothes for tomorrow, get it a little earlier, it'll hurt, shower, eat quickly, go for a jog if you do that, don't go on the internet in the morning tomorrow, make plans instead, do something you like.


I know how it feels. Sleep well.

>>11109326
Stop it.

>>11109417
I won't stop. I am the replica of the positive voice in your head, so scarce might it have shown itself as of late, telling you that, after all, it's not so bad, even throughout all the bad, it's not so bad, even throughout all the bad, it's not so bad, even--- Positivity will triumph in your life, my friend.

My friend.

I know it's strange.
Shouldn't you heed the words..?
Should I tell you more..?
I'm only telling you that you're at a turning point -- but there is no pressure here. Simply put, you have an opportunity.
It is a conscious choice to accept that you are no better than them, and that you sure as hell ain't worse than (Them), who are like all similar to (you).

We are all one, and hurt all together.
I love you.
It's hard to love us, isn't it?

Don't worry so much and go to sleep. You will have a nice day tomorrow, and there is much you can do -- or much to think about.

There is no pressure. Remember that.
Don't let them change your mind on that.

This thread is autosageing so I just want to say that I want to die and I want to die and I hate myself and I want to die and I can't take living anymore and I want to die

>>11109529
No. I refuse that.

I wanted to die and I'M LIVING PROOF.

Don't die just yet. You're okay. Life is very difficult, but you have the opportunity to live.

DON'T DO IT.
I care about you more than anyone has cared about you before. I AM THE PROOF THAT SOMEONE LOVES YOU RIGHT THIS MOMENT and I AM THE PROOF THAT YOU ARE LOVEABLE.

I'm very emotional about this, so please, do me a favour. I just want to be you friend. Please.

>>11109544
>I wanted to die and I'M LIVING PROOF
..jesus?

>>11109529
I know that feel. What are you doing right now? Do you know skillz?

>>11109529
Just to clarify.

The reason I wanted to die is that I had a very fucked up childhood.
My family always supported me -- too much. Until they didn't. At all.

I dropped out of school and couldn't find work. I was practically homeless and addicted to drugs, thoroughly alone and abandonned by all who had loved me before.


YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH TO OVERCOME YOUR ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION. YOU CAN DECIDE TO CHANGE. LET THESE WORDS RING TRUE TO YOU.

You have nothing to lose, just like me, I was at the end of the rope when light shone to my eyes and what I can only think of as my God let clarity in through my tears.

NEVER GIVE UP.

For one I love you, don't give up, don't give in, never let them bring you down, they don't deserve you, plenty of fish in the sea, money isn't everything, avoid a cure that is worse than a disease, better late than never, when people care for you and cry for you, they can straighten out your soul, I love you, take care of yourself, don't worry.

>>11109550
Nah. But I kinda "get" Jesus now.
hah

By the way, you moronic bush-league busters kept me up for five hours to be telling y'all not to die I mean got' dam' boys, what's with our fucking generation(s) wanting to kill themselves? What's this phenomenon?

Love and respect to each and every one of you.

>>11105784
What conclusion is there to make?

>>11109544
>*refute

>>11109686
There must be one, even if it's just a pointless "Our lives are different" conclusion.

>>11098908
I don't know what to do with my life.
I gave up my passions (drawing) and for couple of months now I'm just sliding through everything. Now and then I get really depressed and tend to consider suicide as the best way to end all my doubts. I feel like there's no escape. Job that I have isn't bad, cause it brings some money but anytime I'd like to make a decision to change something (my job, moving to another place) I get paralyzed and I'm unable to decide on anything.
Then the good days come and I forget about all my misery. It's always there, sneaking towards me, but until it doesn't hit me again, life is bearable and even enjoyable.

I don't know what to do. People say you should find a purpose, a responsibility, but it's so hard to do.

>>11109093
>You won't end up spending most of your time and energy on a job you hate
heh

>>11109074
>the majority of uni grads are anything but worthless

>>11099851
I wasn't being dishonest Ben. I just don't do well at critique.