/lit/ - Literature

Actually I have paranoid fantasies about writing a hit novel and being stalked and harassed because of it.

That seems like a hassle to me actually
My >that kid-ism when it comes to writing is
>he imagines getting an agent to wholeheartedly endorse his book with their entire being

No, I fantasize about having a farm, fathering seven children and building a bunker together fully supplied for the inevitable civilizational collapse

>>11102492
>he fantasizes about writing a novel, but as soon as he opens his laptop to write he starts browsing /lit/

>>11102503
>he fantasizes about reading but he browses /lit/ instead

>told by anyone I show my writing that I should pursue a career as a tv/film scriptwriter
>no worth ethic to write more than 20 minutes a day, but constantly having fun with events and characters in my head
>work ethic is a gutter rat
i wish i was dead tbqh

>he fantasizes about writing a peculiar and trenchant that never gets published and is never appreciated until long after he's dead

>He's fantasizes about writing novels, becoming famous, and then finally having the permission needed to kill himself, because his family would be financially sound in the wake of all the heightened sales and my newfound legend

>>11102510
You wish you *were* dead.

>>11102510
give your phone and your pc to your mom you'll start writing to fight the boredom

>>11102519
yeah i'm also dyslexic, I didn't learn to read fluently until I was 15... I basically think in images so that's might be why there's some excitement to by shit

>>11102498
This. I spend way too much time thinking about how I could conceal my true identity while pursuing a literary career. Specially because I want to write weird fiction and I don't want people to conflate that with my serious work.

>>11102515
>novelist
>financially sound

>>11102554
DFW made bank

>>11102548
At least your incorrect grammar will make for believable dialogue, and if you can manage to efface it in the rest of the script you'll be hailed as the next Tarantino.

>>11102548
that guy is wrong the correct grammar is "I wish I was dead"

>>11102584
Why? It's a wish, it should be in the subjunctive mood.

>>11102492
I fantasize about writing something that actually pleases me. After that, I really don't care what happens. ..Actually, anonymity's the new 'celebrity' -- i actually like my relative invisibility. Pseudonymity's the way to go: avoidance of whatever hooplah.. Youre my brothers forever anons, whatever 'happens'

>>11102600
maybe the anon meant it in the indicative

>>11102507
>he browses /lit/ but realizes he can't read

>>11102611
He uses the word "wish" in the sentence itself.

>>11102611
>It is the case that I wish I were dead

>>11102627
>>11102640
well he might've meant wish in a way that you didn't think of yet

>>11102653
What sense is that?

>>11102664
well maybe he saw a shooting star outside and knew anything would happen if he wished it

>>11102681
The fact that he wishes he were dead, even if he knew it would come to pass if he merely wished it, means that the state is not presently occurring. So, it would still be in the subjunctive mood. But at this point I think you're just tickling my dick.

>>11102681
>I wish I was dead, because when the assassins from the future came to visit me last month, they were able to extrapolate information regarding my life restoring chamber and thereafter disabled it causing me to never have been able to thwart their plot.

>>11102693
>>11102705
hanging up my hat with a smile knowing i kept the bait going for so long

>>11102492
>travelling around the country on a book tour
That would involve public speaking and being compelled into meetings with lots of random people. Do not want.

I fantasize about writing a book but keeping my identity hidden so when people talk about me as the writer I can criticize myself in the third person.

>>11102492
>travelling around the country on a book tour
Nah fuck that. I'd pull a Salinger and live in isolated comfort my whole life.

>fantasize about getting interviewed by moronic journalists that ask me nonsense questions and I give them the Thomas Bernhard treatment

>>11102492
A book tour sounds like a nightmare.

I wouldn’t want to say shit or explain any of my intentions behind writing stuff. You’re always more of a brainlet in person than on paper because on paper you have years to think and edit and rewrite, so anything you said would only ruin your mystique.

If I wrote a good book that actually made money I would refuse to do book tours or interviews. I’d fuck off and buy a nice old house with some land in a rural town, have a family, have no internet, just a room for my library and a typewriter.

;_;

>>11102793
aren't book tours just to get audience pucci

I fantasize about writing a couple groundbreaking books that change the world forever.

They’re usually non-fiction, though, and are either about mathematics or economics or sociology/social philosophy

>>11102833
that's really gay, anon

Actually, I fantasize about writing a brilliant, (maybe even) masterpiece novel anonymously and then become famous as the only (as well as harshest) critic of the novel until it is revealed posthumously that I was actually the author as well.

>>11102840
You’re really gay

>>11102712
You gotta leave the grammarians alone, big guy.

>>11102498
>>11102552
>the chad sincere desire to be recognized for hard work vs the virgin pretentious daydreams about showing everyone how youre too good for them

>>11102492
>and travelling around the country on a book tour
No.

>>11102967
me on the left

>>11102492
Honestly I just want to make like $100k/year off writing. Enough to live comfy in my comfy Midwest town.

>>11102988
kek. You write erotica then?

>he fantasizes about writing a super good post and getting tons of (You)s

>>11103006
>C_Data_Users_Colin

>>11103006
>Windows phone

>>11103006
Here's a (you), Colin

>tfw actually authored and released a memoir about a particular experience I had
>sold decently but not nearly enough to give me financial stability
>have to work full time still

>>11102501
fag lol

>>11102999
No. And I wouldn't. But $100k/year from writing is a nice dream.

>fantasize about mine getting published and getting an HBO series like gay throes did
>become rich
>go digital nomad and write novels from cafes...but in other countries!!
>live in that country a while to "research" setting for novel before moving to next one
>never have to wear fucking office clothes again, have like 3 outfits, a laptop, and a toothbrush
Look at all the fucking garbage that gets published and somehow mine can't get through? Man. I just want to be a millionaire, why is that so hard?

>>11102833
>know two people who think they will write the book that will "change da worldo"
>both of them are fuckup losers IRL who can't even sort out their own basic problems and become functioning adults, much less can they fix society
>one is nearly 30, one is late 50s, not even teenagers we're talking about
>neither has written a single word towards it
>neither will shut the fuck up about it
It's like a broke man writing a business guide.

>>11103006
Go to bed, Colin.

>>11102492
>implying I would attach my real name to my work

>>11103515
>not dressing up once you hit the big time
it's almost like you have no aesthetic sensibilities

>>11102492
who does?

>>11103515
What have you published?
Who are you?

>>11102501
This but unironically(also with 10 kids)

>>11103269
Name senpai?

>>11102498
>>11102492

i am so paranoid about my book that i refused to put my name on it.

not even because of the content, but because i am a shit writer and can't format to save my life

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07CVHJJ75

>>11104533
Sounds like something that could be interesting, too bad I have no money at all so I can't find out. When I get a job I very well might.

>>11104547
for you my lit homies ill put it down for you
free of charge, feel free to comment on it :)

and if you feel like you want to drop me some money, great.
if not, great.

its my first book, i would be glad just having someone enjoy my suffering

>>11104547

https://expirebox.com/download/868264033b5f0f95c7d6fbdbac6c3e8a.html

>>11104558
Thanks anon! I'm about half way through and can already say that you didn't proof read it very well, there are a lot of instances where you are missing either punctuation or articles. Your writing style is also all over the place, you seem too scared to commit to a style so instead you scrape the surface of many. Every paragraph I've read so far is very brief, I find it impossible to get lost in a story when not long after I start it has already finished. When you start to go into any kind of depth you suddenly move on. I guess these are all things to be expected from somebody's first book, keep writing and most of all stop being a pussy. When you fail to commit to what you are writing you will end up with a boring piece that isn't capable of capturing the readers full attention. Don't give up homie. with more practice you could definitely write some great stuff.

>>11104655

many thanks!

>>11102492
nah dude

>write a hit novel
>be a weird recluse who is rarely seen and is known for getting in altercations with paparazzi who try to get in my face

>>11102492
>implying

>>11104655

I figured that would happen, as i was writing it i felt uneasy since if i went into more detail and deeper into each chapter it would basically be erotica.

guess that was a poor decision to leave it half finished lol

as for the styles, punctuation and articles.
well i am not a good writer. i was, very close to hiring someone to editing my piece but decided against it.

>>11102492
>he fantasizes

>>11104655
lol my anxiety is now kicking in, i see more people downloaded that shit book, I REGRET EVERYTHING

I SHOULDN'T HAVE PUBLISHED THAT TRASH
ITS JUST A FIRST DRAFT ILL FIX IT

>>11102492
>he fantasizes about writing a hit novel and parlaying it into a movie deal to make enough money to fuck off into obscurity

>me in my fantasy riding off into the sunset

>>11104688
I don't mean go into detail about the sex, but rather the people and the situation. It's all well and good to say "I got catfished" but there is so much more that can be extracted from that whole event.

>>11104779
That's just how it is, people will criticize your work. It's your job to use that criticism to become better. Don't expect it to happen over night, the way I see it being able to write beautifully is almost like writing in a different language.

>>11102510
>potential talent to make a career with
>just too lazy to do it
>wants to die to avoid self discipline
I hate you

>>11102624

i look at picture of lit
some time read

>>11103006
why did you do it, Colin?

>>11102492
I fantasize about writing a series with a small but outspoken and supportive following enabling me to afford the rent and continue writing on the outskirts of town

>>11102503
>he 'writes' on a laptop

>>11102492
>>11102498
Synthesis of these two: I have fantasies of being shot dead while touring my controversial hit novel. I am lauded as a martyr, especially when they discover my unfinished manuscript for my next hit novel. Crowds worldwide gather in the streets and wail, "ah, he was so young!" and "oh, what could have been!"

>>11103006
I sympathize Colin. You’re kinda funny so here’s a (you).

>>11106628
good taste, never once seen this masterpiece mentioned on /lit/ glad you had a good childhood

>>11102492
I fantasize about being debt free and making enough every month to not starve to death by writing words. everything else is a bonus

>>11103006
D-dad??