/lit/ - Literature

>>10378358
i was sitting in the Burger King (Aus: Hungry Jack's) on the corner of Bourke and Russell Street with my wife. we'd just been to a goth shop called Lucrezia / De Sade and bought some magazines, including an issue of Amelia G's "Blue Blood".

in it, she reviewed an SF anthology called "Technosex", collected by Cecelia Tan, and she selected one story for particular praise.

a story written by me.

i had a kind of cerebral orgasm. someone i'd never met who had nothing to gain from it, had approved of something i'd written.

>>10378358
Remembering the happiest moment in my life is consequently one of the main reasons I'm depressed

>>10378358
I was about 9 or 10 years old, and I got a phone call. It was my friend. His family was going to see a movie, and he invited me to come along. That was the first time I felt a sense that other people liked me, and it was really nice.

I was 16 because it was my 16th birthday. I had just grown boobs and even more recently bought a blue sundress in Chicago. my best friend and I had Spanish summer school in the morning and after that she bought us sandwiches and we drove in her old blue VW with crank windows to a nature preserve to picnic and smoke cigarettes. I unbuttoned my dress down to the waist and the sun was warm on my skin. we were the only people for miles and we were eating raspberries

>>10378453
weak and histrionic

>>10378464
sorry bitch its true

>>10378358

I won $600 one time playing competitive machine dance games. But it's hard to say if they made me happy or just kept me from killing myself. I really should have killed myself.

>>10378358
First blowjob I got, the girl swallowed. No lie, was also the first time I got high.

>>10378453
Beautiful

>>10378464
and your happiest moment ever was when you tried to step on someone else's happiness by judging it weak.

sucks to be you.

>>10378358
First DIY show I ever went to 10 years ago. After Pocahaunted performed I cried.

>>10378358
It was the 6th day out of a 10 day meditation retreat. At the end of the day, I could count on my fingers the individual external stimuli that had captured my attention. An air vent. A group of meditators paying attention to something. Likely the geese, but I didn't even think to glance over to what they were attending to. The normal day-to-day stream of mind had slowed to where the space in-between thoughts became tangible. I could watch each thought arise and inevitably fall away.

I was sitting in my room meditating and I was finding myself distracted by the soft breeze blowing through the window, as well as the sounds of birdsong. This was not the "deepest" meditation that I had ever had, if fact, the pleasantness of the breeze and song were something that I had grown to be cautious of, at least in the context of meditation. Yet, even if the context of the event establishes itself to me as a temporary happiness, it was still a profound one.

>>10378358
I can't really rank the happy moments in my life, but one that sticks out to me was around the fifth of July. My then-boyfriend and I lived far away from each other, so the majority of our time spent together was during long drives back and forth between our homes. I stayed a bit late instead of caring about getting back before curfew, and we just sat close quietly and held each. When we kissed, there were literal fireworks, someone just shot off their leftovers the moment our lips met, and I said that I loved him for the first time.

>>10378583
you highlighted the epitome of my life ty

>>10378618
How long had you been meditating before then? What sort of retreat was it?

It was christmas time a few years ago. I regained contact with a girl I used to see, but not date, about a year before that. We went to the same school, and she got bored with me over the summer and ended it because I just wanted a FWB type deal and was mean to her. I ended up realizing I was completely in love with her. I would go to her neighborhood to go pick up friends or drive by where she worked at on my way home, and think about her everytime. Usually I would burst into tears or at least fall into severe depression. Anyway, I tried playing the long game with her to start seeing her again, and long story short, we hung out a few times again.

She was always super reserved and coy, and wouldn't even kiss or touch me. She did it on purpose, probably because she wasn't all that into me. I was a pussy and couldn't get the nerve to tell her I actually liked her and wanted her back. We hung out maybe three times, and nothing happened, and I just got more obssessive and depressed. We hung out one night before halloween. She drove us around a little bit, we got something to eat, and then we went to the waterfront in town to walk around. We went out on the docks and sat in silence. HEr mom called her, and told her she had to go home. She looked at me and said we had to go, then I just told her that I was in love with her and that if i didn't tell her, I would regret it the rest of my life. She looked at me and wiped a tear from her eye, then kissed me really hard. We made out for 30 minutes on the docks, and we're still together

>>10378648
It was a Vipassana retreat and it was the second such retreat that I've been one. I did my first one a year before that. Didn't start meditating in earnest until that first retreat.

>>10378453
why is everything with broads about their sexuality and physicality at the end of the day

>My cunt became the world

>>10378785
what? because she unbuttoned her dress? thats the only sexual thing i can read from it, and she said she's basically alone with a gf. quit projecting your perversion

>>10378358

When I experienced my first awakening experience. I had been meditating for a while, but I didn't reach an awakened state doing the same old "mindfulness" meditation everyone was preaching about. No doubt there are benefits to meditating, but I didn't experience an awakening doing it that way.

I was interested in some other practices, so I got this audiobook by Loch Kelly a while back. And while doing one of the guided practices, something just shifted. It was almost like nothing happened, but everything happened.

For these few moments, I was completely unidentified with myself and just experienced things as they were. It was quite liberating.

I must admit that it has been a while since I've done a formal practice, but I do plan on getting back into it again.

>>10378746
That's fascinating. Such reports inspired me to take up meditation, but I couldn't get over the desire for them to occur, and the frustration drove me to quit. I'd still give it another go sometime.

Was that ever a problem for you?

>>10378798
Woman's happiest experience
>I was a young nymphette and my breasts had just began to menstruate. I unbuttoned my cunt and my clitoris twitched with the anticipation of the beautiful picnic before me. I am a woman and back then when this story took place I was also a woman, I had breasts and a vagina. My vagina quivered as my breasts bounced bountifully in my dress and I unbuttoned my dress and let my breasts become my cunt.

Man's happiest experience
>It was during a meditation retreat and I was doing vipassana meditation. I saw God and found my center and developed myself as a human being.

>>10378807

i prefer the woman to the man tho, men just talk about dumb shit like god who isnt even real

>>10378358
I don't think I've ever been happy.

The weird thing is, nothing really stands out. I don't feel happiness very strongly, and in the past few years I have begun to suspect that the times I've acted the happiest when I was younger, I was really just imitating behaviors from other people's happy moments that I'd seen before. Now that I live alone, now that there aren't always people around to please by showing them that I'm happy, my responses are growing duller.

For example, it snowed overnight earlier this week, in Houston, where I live. It rarely does that, and even more rarely in such an amount as it did. Snow and cold weather are dear to me, given that 90% of the time in this city, the weather is miserable. Despite that, when I awoke to a cold morning and a yard blanketed in snow, I found myself barely able to come up with a smile. I felt a distant sense of satisfaction, but none of the outward elation I would have shown even just a few years ago.

I have no specific moments I can think of, only streams of moments from the distant past. I recall vacationing with my father to probably be my happiest. Meeting my relatives in Florida and being on the beach and seeing the ocean in person, eating new foods, new sensations all around. Makes me want kids.

>>10378785
>why is everything with broads about their sexuality and physicality at the end of the day

because they have breasts and they can play with them whenever they want, and you can't touch them. that's why.

>>10378358
First acid trip. Just pure glory, pure being.

>>10378807
we cling to cunts and cocks of despair

>>10378446
That does sound really nice :)

>>10378807
a) you sound jealous
b) maybe happiness and sex are inseparable

>>10378785
the story is about freedom you dumbass

>>10378806
Yup - it's a very common problem, at all levels of experience. Even if it's just expectation of a mild feeling of relaxation.

I think it's helpful to think of it like weight lifting. It's a long slow process with gradual results. Any 'events' are just numbers increasing to multiples, like finally benching 200

>>10378785
Your world started inside a cunt, so it's not far off

>>10378433
I understand this feel on a visceral level

>>10378802
What meditation?

im naturally melancholic due to rough teenage years, nothing in particular stands out as #1 but heres one that came to mind

first time i did ketamine

I accidentally orally swallowed 300mg of ketamine. I thought it was mescaline... there had been a mix up in getting what i thought was mescaline

I took a shower and fifteen minutes in after come up my legs felt... weak like i couldnt control them and was really drunk. I said out loud

I thought mescaline takes like 2 hours to come up

walk into the living room and I feel uncomfortable. Trying to watch Drug Store Cowboy but I feel this visceral disgust with this movie. not sure why

Frustration and confusion and sitting on my couch trying to relax for the first hour. When on ketamine you lose motor skill function, walking becomes difficult

At some point I moved onto my bed laying there just dreaming and I started meditating

I had this serene calm that I have felt glimmers of many times since then, mind commentary completely gone, no thoughts, just... a sensational blur. All notions of what I am or who I am didnt matter. I was the most at peace id ever felt in 20+ years. I meditated for hours... I lost track of time and got locked into this blur where time did not matter

I love dissociatives and have revisited them often since doing lady k

Also first time I had sex on acid was incredible, was with my first love, at my apartment next door to the bar, old bare wood boards with aging piping and scribbles from the previous lunatics who lived there (one love letter left behind from the lunatics: "EAT SHIT AND DIE"). I remember us talking beforehand, breath sensitive, hearts racing, wild stare, and I said

primal. It feels so primal. Proceeding to fuck like animals for hours. great times, never felt so alive and right

After fucking we went onto the rooftop in hot summer heat. I had a small window that accessed the rooftop and we would go up there do bong hits and watch drunk people get in petty arguments

I miss that apartment

I had just railed a line of methamphetamine in the Nojoqui park after being up about a week. It was early in the morning. The nature and flaming dopamine rush burning in my head elated an artificial sublimity. Never experienced such a beaming release of what felt like pure heaven. Its sad to know that moment was caused by a substance. The real question is, does the moments causation being meth subtract from it?

>>10378986
No, but as you said, its artificial

>>10378986
>elated an artificial sublimity.
Shitty writing desu something sublime shouldn't be elated or even artificial really

>>10378817

>>10378986
You kind of have to pay the piper in the end though, don't you? I know I did. In a way I feel like it makes it more "fair", like you "earned" the good feelings with all the misery.

>>10378785
lmao 2real

>>10378453
god this story is so bougie it hurts. muh cigarettes muh travel muh clothes muh consumption. before you ask, no i am not resentful, i am simply immortal and tired, deal with it bougie bitch

happiest was this idea that i felt inside that I have a kind of insane compulpassiospiritinitudinousity occuring which will give me some measure of a tiny key to the kingdom of things
otherwise i am a broken nothing among a sea of robotic heathens

I've done acid, had a gf, seen sublime sights, and had my writing praised by many people. Strangely, the happiest moment that comes to mind was right after one of the worst moments. I was working a shift and some customer was very upset because she thought I was working too slow and she was in a hurry (as they always are). So she called me some racist things. It was one of my first times dealing with a shitty customer and the racism made it worse. I took a 15 min break to breathe and texted my friend, who just listened and said stuff like "im sorry that happened, i love you man, and i wish i could have fucked up that customer." It hurt me in a good way. Knowing that someone out there had my back.

>>10379058
I pray that you feel suffer something morreal soon

>>10379064
calm down oldfag. live and let live eh?

>>10379069
>can't see sincere wellwishing if it bit him in the arse

>>10379038
I don't disagree but it was a fleeting moment where I had some adult freedom but no self-awareness or real critical consciousness. most other posts are drug related, so I guess happiness is reliant upon a degree of ignorance (willfull or not) and maybe that allows the physical sensations to take primacy.
btw I got last house on the left'd in the end if it makes you feel any better

>>10379058
>ive seen things you wouldn't believe

Loneliness is the divine sadness

God in his heaven, all is right with the world, and yet

and yet.

This thing rebounds, subway, sublimin, subcon, it comes back: "You're the only one around, Me"

That
Well, we don't have to feel that profound sadness, we are creatures of God, thankfully. We want to know God? No, that is true loneliness. Let us know ourselves and each other. That is happiness. Thus has God made this world. You don't understand anyone besides yourself? That is the supreme blessing. To understand completely is to be. To be all is to be singular, alone. No one else. You don't know what I'm on about? Congrats, I've cured your loneliness.

>>10379097
sorry, the comment just sounded sarcastic like "hope you suffer something more real, as opposed to that kiddie suffering you got going on"

>>10379098
You got raped? Nice.

Not best, but my heart is warmed when thinking to my childhood days with my best friend, laying on the kitchen floor making our own Pokemon cards out of construction paper and markers.

>>10379137
interacting w het men is pretty much both literal & figurative rape

>>10379148
Very nice

>>10379153
kik?

>>10379156
>>10379153
You two worrie me

>>10379156
Why?

>>10379165
I just like the fact that women feel violated on a daily basis, both psychically, physically, and spiritually.

>>10379178
so we can spiritually violate each other ofc

>>10379226
No thanks, I don't speak to f*males. You were probably a banana slug or a weaver ant in your past life.

>>10379226
don't trust this guy, he's a skeleton.

>>10379058
pussy

>>10378807
Fucking kek

Watching Peter Rabbit and Friends and other English cartoon stories as a young child, believing that England was still the England depicted in the stories and books. Walking through fields and running with dogs, believing England was still the same.
I cannot visit the countryside, enjoy anything remotely English or reminisce of nicer times without looking at the news, or looking outside and seeing what it is now, and imagining what it will be.
t. Englishman

>>10378425
I am disgusted by you. What even is a Goth Shop? Just a Hot Topic? I am going to use every tool and resource at my disposal to destroy you and your dumb wife.
Also you published in a Sci-fi anthology, not only that, but it was called "Technosex."
Also fuck Burger King. Fuck anyone that wants to eat at Burger King. It is the only fast food that sinks below the level of McDonald's.

>>10379512
hows autism going

>>10378358
Happy moments are for the weak

I was lying on the grass, resting on my elbows in a pastoral landscape deep in the Carpathian. My state was solely observational, devoid of thoughts and the anticipation of them. I had lost the feeling of being the 'thinker of my thoughts' and was selflessly surveying the landscape as they appeared in my consciousness with a detached awareness.

>>10379058
>>10378453
>Walking through the streets of Chicago
>It was my 16th birthday, therefore I was 16
>Me and my boy Big Eddie were shooting the shit when all of the sudden, some dumb Mexican bitch in a blue sundress
>Decide to rape her, as I am a black man and that is a part of my culture
>Cop tries to stop it
>Big Eddie shoots the cop
>Smoke a crack rock
>Pure happiness

Walking out of a theater around new year's eve and seeing snow beginning to flit down against the street-lit surroundings. It mostly just rains where I live, so it was nice to have some snow to conclude the year.

Memories of being young and naive, drinking cheap lambrusco wine on the gianicolo hill overlooking rome at sunset. Love that memory.

I don't remember

>>10378358

When I made this.

>>10379564
Say what you like about Sammy, I am so glad he unearthed that masterpiece. It's like the missing link to post-post-modernity

>>10379516
Ah, I already know what I'm going to be for halloween: your extra chromosome.
Have fun with your gauges and you and your wife's fetlife accounts.
Also I dare you to post your mediocre writing to this thread.

>>10379569
what's the big deal

>>10379583
>being this pleb

When I was going on concerts to see my favourite band (it was a local band).
+When I was watching Lost.
That was until 8 years ago. Only misery and suffering after that.

>>10378807
And in turn, I am disgusted by people like you. How petty and feebleminded you are.

>>10379703
looks like this roastie is getting toasty

>>10378358

I can't even think of it

I'm a hollow, unfeeling robot

Please end what you would call my life

>>10379723
It's alright bro, happiness can't be that great. In fact, I feel a sort of smug contentment and amusement at my lack of joy. Is that what people call "happiness"? Emotion is a worldly and therefore ephemeral thing

When I was 16 almost 17 my mother (single mother) came up to my room and said the daughter of her colleague at work asked if she could borrow my copy of Scar Tissue by Anthony Kiedis. I said ok but wasn't quite sure why they had been talking about that anyway. On a weekend afternoon I was playing on my pc in room alone as usual and I hear unfamiliar voices downstairs. There's a knock at my door and my mother says do I have the book since her co-worker and daughter are here. I panicked and found the book and cleaned my entire room in like 30 seconds for some reason freaking out. I even changed into a shirt and different trousers, as if I was going to a dinner or something. I went downstairs with the hardback book and stood by the door silently not wanting to interrupt their conversation. The girl and my mother noticed me but the girl's mother was saying something and didn't notice me. The girl was red-haired and pale and very cute, and seemed a little shy but not so much that it dominated her personality (like it did mine) and made her weird, "dark" or melancholy. Her mother saw them looking at me and stopped talking to turn and apologize for not seeing me. I handed over the book to the girl and she smiled and said "Thank you." I stood there with my hands in my pockets and didn't know what to do next, until my mother leaned in to talk to the woman and again and said "Hey [my name], Sarah's into her music too" and I lifted my eyebrows to show that I thought was cool and interesting on a personal level. My mother then said "why don't you show her your CDs?". This was around 2006 so I still had a ton of CDs in my room on two big vertical racks. I said ok and they began talking again leaning towards each other. I walked sideways up the stairwell not to be rude and she walked quietly behind me. In my room I closed the door a little and stood silently at the far side of the room with my hands over my genitals. The CD racks were unmissable but I could tell she didn't care. I sat on my bed and said "sit" and pointed at my swivel chair. She sat on the edge of it and shrugged her jacket off but didn't touch the sides of the chair or my desk as they were covered in semen or just dirt in general. She asked if she could use the bathroom and I walked her along the hallway and pointed inside the bathroom. She was in there for like 15 minutes and came back but didn't seem ashamed that she had probably been defecating. She sat back on the swivel chair and I put on the Californication album and pointed it out and she faked enthusiasm. We sat quietly listening to it and staring at the ground until her mother called her to leave. Her mother seemed really happy, and mine did too, as if thought we were attracted to each other. When she left I saw that her beanie hat had fallen out of her jacket pocket and onto the floor in my room. I fucked that thing for weeks until it was damp as hell and didn't smell good at all. It's probably still in my drawers at home somewhere.

>>10379748
truly the John Green of out time

I think there are about 3 moments I recall at first.

During summer holidays when I was around 15 probably, I was eating ice cream, it was really sunny, I was alone and I was thinking how nice it is. I was just content being alone and having no responsibilities at the time.

I don't know if it was earlier or later in my life, but one night before going to sleep I was thinking about what I was afraid of, and I decided that all those things weren't that big of a deal. That no matter what happens, nothing is really that bad in life. Pain, death? Can't phase me, I was in love with everything.

The last moment was perhaps the last and only time in which I spent a whole day with other people just hanging out, playing video games. I think I was around 17, I was laughing all the time. Makes me kinda jealous that other people have friends and do stuff regularly together. All these people forgot about me as soon as school ended, so I wish I could go back to the mindset from where I was 15, maybe I just need to have a more stable life, where I'm not anxious about the future, and I will be content alone again.

>>10379748
well that took a turn in the end there

>>10379748
While I was reading this, I forgot you were almost 17 and instead read it from the perspective of a 5 year old.

>>10379748

This being the happiest moment in your life actually made me more depressed

I don't remember it, but it was great

>>10379748
Laughed out loud at the ending

I don't wanna remember it desu. I always feel like I'm chasing that lost feeling of being young and satisfied with myself or simply reminiscing about better days. But by simply referring to them as better days just goes to show how lackluster life has become.

Yet nothing good can come out of reminiscing, only despair.

>>10379569
Schizophrenia doesn't count

>>10379741
Yeah, I don't think it's healthy, but I've been really gravitating towards melancholy and suffering lately. As in I feel like suffering is more beautiful, and more meaningful than happiness.
Perhaps this has made me behave self-destructively at times, so now my goal is to do everything I can to succeed, and still fail miserably at the end. This way I will be proud of myself, but still not be disgustingly happy. The more pain I feel, the more superior to others I feel. Fuck happy people.

I don't know, how do I find out? What's a happy moment?

Sometimes when I spend time with my gf a very spontaneous sort of enthusiasm and ecstasy just kinda washes over me, then I can barely speak. It's not connected to anything in particular.

A few times when I went on holiday with my parents come to mind, especially reading a book with a contented kind of tiredness or eating food and laying around, not doing anything in particular.

A few times when I was around my brother's kids too, but those moments also make me extremely depressed.

I think ultimately the happiest feeling I know is feeling like I've gained time. Like taking a day off, or being calm enough to just let time pass, not towards anything specific in the near future, just letting it pass.

A tiny amount of moments of accomplishment, like winning a competition or reading something I wrote and really liking it.

None of these seem to be "the best moment" of my life

>>10379802
That's because your life, like most people, has no "best" moments. It will pass a fleeting mundanity like so many others and you will be gone

>>10379817
I bet I had more best moments than you. In fact I having one right now as I gaud over you, I have at least a few a day in fact.

>>10379817
Maybe you're right

this >>10379842 wasn't me

>>10379817
>>10379845
samefag, this >>10379845 wasn't me

>>10378453

Don't get why this gets so much hate. Sounds genuinely nice, though very cliché. The raspberries were my favorite part.

>>10379857
>Don't get why this gets so much hate

take a guess anon

>>10378707

Liked this 1, tho still not as good as my relationship story

>>10378807
Kys

That time I talked to birds while on shrooms. They said they loved me.

>>10379857
It has many triggers for your typical anon:

>a woman wrote it
>the 2nd sentence is about her boobs
>she has a friend
>at 16 they had a car and smoked cigarretes
>they were happy

>>10378453
hey sexy open bobs for me now pleas

Kissing my then best friend in my bedroom at 3 am.
We returned from a fair a few hours earlier and were lying in my bed dozing off for a bit.
When I got up to look at the moon shining through my window she followed and looked me straight in the eyes. Then it just clicked.


She broke up recently so I don't really like thinking about it

>>10379905
A kiss is your happiest moment? How pleb, you'd think on /lit/ it would be at lest somewhat more intellectual

>>10379922
nice b8

>>10379986
That would be some weird bait if it was. It's just a normal, perhaps semi-serious, statement. Not everything is a troll.

>>10379905
Beautiful moment, thanks for sharing. It's likely no consolation but I'm going through the same thing. I miss her a lot.

When I met up with a girl I had met on the internet after talking with her for about a year. I was extremely down and had no one to talk to when we started talking to each other. We slept together but did not have sex. We had pizza, watched Netflix, and sat in her apartment for two days. The moment of true beauty when you finally meet the person you've been talking with so much, and longing for, that moment when you finally don't have to wait anymore. It was my first female contact since kissing Ida in Grade 4.

Later she said that she had seen me as a friend since the beginning. That she had been interested in the beginning, but that I had not given her any hints, and thus moved on. Since then my life has been nothing but misery, trying to accept her feelings, and being a good friend while being torn apart inside. I sometimes have drunken ramblings in the night and text her, saying things that are embarassing, but she always forgives me. And she always talks to me.

>>10380036
Move on. It's harder to do then say but you're only harming yourself in the process and it will be the end of you if you persist with this sort of behaviour.

find a new girl

>>10380036
lol this much energy spent over some thot
get a life

>>10379485
If it makes you feel any better, I still think England is neat.

>>10380067
sadly, many parts do not resemble England anymore, this is largely due to mass immigration. There has also been a large cultural revolution in the minds of the English people too, so many of them feel little connection to these lands

>>10378358
I'm not sure, there are several. Some of them are intellectual - sudden moments of realization or understanding. Some of them have to do with drug use - e.g. tripping on shrooms, although I can't really trip anymore without having a paranoia-engulfed bad trip. Some of them even have to do with video games and playing CoD4 and (especially) Halo 3, and being really good at them (I was really into MLG and had some semi-pro friends, but never made it quite that far myself).

However the moments that I probably miss the most were those I shared with my girlfriend when we would lay in my bed at night watching TV, or go out somewhere in Baltimore for the day, or hang out together with her friends or mine. Specifically, I remember and enjoyed seeing Star Wars the Force Awakens (even though I'm not a Star Wars fan), seeing Kung Fu Panda 3, and going to 4th of July at the country club with her. It was also really nice when we got to vacation together at this place called Chincoteague, and we just stayed inside the whole time at watched movies and shit, including Lord of the Rings, of which she was a huge fan and I was always uninterested. Unfortunately, she broke up with me almost a year and a half ago.

>>10380115
I loathe you and everything you represent

>>10380126
y tho

>>10380164
pseudo intellectualism, drugs, video games, genre fiction, gf, friends, normie

what's there not to hate about you

First time I hung out with extended family since I was a kid (live on the other side of the world). They treated me as their own. Never had that feeling before. That warm safe feeling.

>>10380102
I'm a foreigner currently living in the UK for my studies and it blows my fucking mind when I hear brits blame immigration for how shitty this country is. British people are what ruined Britain. Before I came here I have never been exposed to such a high density of downright stupid, uncultured, and most of all nasty people. I've lived with 7 different Brits over the years and absolutely all of them were complete retards with no sense of responsibility or hygiene. You might say now that it was just bad luck, but that's not the case. I've talked to numerous other international students, mostly European ones, all of whom have made similar experiences. In fact whenever I meet up with internationals 70% of our discussions are centred around the absolute fucking disgust we have towards this country and how we can't wait to get our degrees and piss off. The expression nasty English didn't come into existence out of thin air. Face it, England sucks because it's full of English people. The English ruined Scotland, the English ruined Ireland, the English ruined America, the English ruined India.

tl;dr The UK is full of disgusting rats.

>>10380255
best feel for me too in similar circumstances

>>10380269
As a fellow foreigner, I must disagree. British further education is almost as bad as American SJW memes. 90% of those interested in culture and politics come out of British Unis as Marxists. Heterodoxy is discouraged in academia. Scotland is far worse than England in this respect and this isn't due to the English.

There was a time when England attracted immigrants who wanted to live there because they wanted to be English. The vast majority of post mid 60s immigrants want to insulate their culture from English values and younger generations are in direct opposition to them - mind you, this is also true for many young natives.

>>10380234
My life sucks. I wouldn't consider myself a pseud. I have a deep and genuine interest in philosophy, linguistics, and math. I'm not really into video games, and haven't been for years, but I was when I was in middle school and even as a freshman in high school.

Also I don't like genre fiction or popular culture at all. I mostly read non-fiction, but if I do read fictions it's usually Russian or German classics. The movies I personally like are mostly silent films and period pieces I guess, I don't know (my favorite movie and the one I've watched the most is probably the Cabaret of Doctor Caligari). My great fondness for memories of watching Star Wars and Lord of the Ring has more to do with who I watched them with and the fact that for a moment inn my life I felt truly comfortable and happy, and not in saccharine or artificial manner,

As for the drugs, they've nearly ruined my life. Years later, I look back on the birth and eventual development of our relationship, and I envy those times, and wish my my concerns today were the same as those I had back then, but unfortunately, over the years I've developed an addiction to heroin and other things have changed in ways that can't be undone.

>>10378358
When I was a kid, I used to play on this tiny hill by the soccer fields while my brother was practicing. It was only like a 20 foot hill, but in New Orleans that made it like a mountain. I remember one time in the summer around 3rd grade playing on the hill with my friend from school, making rings out of those flowery weeds, rolling down the hill, going over to play on the traintracks. I was so happy.

>>10380269
Yeh as a Scot I can confidently say you've no fucking clue what you're talking about. Scotland was never 'colonised' - we united with England under King James the FIRST of England and SIXTH of Scotland out of mutual and self-interest. What country are you from genius?

>>10379537
Hals is such a tool

>>10380375
The fact you needed to explain yourself further isn't really proving him wrong.

When I dreamed that I died.

>>10380397
Wait, thought of a better one:
>Sophomore year in high school
>me and like 6 other friends went over to our friend's house
>tripping on acid
>climbed up his tree
>walked down to the river
>ran around with the wind blowing in my hair
>pure happiness
Wind is so amazing on acid

>>10380422
I'm just a human being, confused and alone. Perhaps I've done something to embarrass myself, but all I ask is for your forgiveness if I have.

>>10378785

They are little more than their bodies and gender.

>>10380477
You are little more than memes and cliches, a neural network could make your posts and nobody would notice a difference

>>10380485

I mean a neural network is more of a person than most women...

They rarely if ever refer reduce the information they receive to "I'm a neural network".

>>10380485

I mean a neural network is more of a person than most women...

They rarely if ever reduce the information they receive to "I'm a neural network".

This summer my gf (ex now) had her final year exhibition in the city where I went to uni a few years earlier. I hadn't visited the place since I graduated so the day after her show I woke up early to wander around the streets and eventually made my way back up to the main campus. It was the middle of summer so there were barely any students and walking around I felt a genuine sense of bliss/nostalgia that I hadn't experienced in a long time. She eventually drove up and met me there and we had lunch outside. The whole thing made me exceptionally happy and is probably the best I've felt in years.

>>10380269
>the English ruined American
>the English ruined India
>the English ruined Scotland
>ruined Scotland
O i am laffin

>>10379058
You have to go back.

>>10379582
Not that guy but this is legit the most autistic thing I've read all week.

>>10380269
I'm not saying the English people aren't mostly decadent, they are. But when there are no English left in England then there is no hope at all.

>>10379748
>those tonal shifts
>that prose that hits the autism of the situation just right
>that subtle subtext that shows that maybe it was his happiest moment because he made his mom and her mom proud and happy for a moment, even if it was a noble lie
This post was literatvre

>>10380446
You shouldn't be asking for it to begin with , my word shouldn't mean anything to you

>>10379780
It's autism you dip.

>>10380663
One could just get to the point and say nothing matters, but I've always taken a firm stance against this position myself.

>>10378358
my first college debate tournament with a qt partner

It was April an April evening and Nora and I were soaked in rain. We were walking back to my flat when I decided to go inside the antique bookshop I’ve been eyeing for weeks. As we got in I combed my wet hair back and to the side with my palm and I was hit by the smell of my perfume, our wet clothes and that of old books. It must’ve been near closing time, as the cashier had her umbrella and jacket ready. She got up to help us, I turned towards her and said “Good evening,” but Nora already had me by the hand and pulled me towards the letter K. I gave the cashier a nod and she smiled back then sat back. I felt like she was envious of us, envious of Nora, and I was filled with happiness and pride. Nora took a book in her hands, skimmed through a paragraph of the introduction, then turned a few pages. I saw a familiar look in her eyes, when she tried to put the book back I took it from her hands. She said I don’t have to, she doesn’t want it. I paid for the book and kissed her forehead.
When we left the shop the rain was starting to faint. It was not cold but chilly enough to wear a long coat over something light. It was windy at the bus stop and the large square offered no protection. She opened my coat and hugged me, wrapping it around and warming herself like she always used to do. The sun has already disappeared behind mount G. and I could barely decide between looking at the silhouette of the mountain looming over this part of the city, the lit-up E. bridge, and Nora. I took it all in, until Nora, the sunset, the mountain and the bridge were one and inseparable, as if one couldn’t exist without the other.

>>10381078
When we got home I changed into a torn up, dry shirt and comfortable pants. My small flat smelled of cigarettes, so I opened a window before warming it up. Nora opened my wardrobe and took out a sweatshirt that was too big for her size. Her shoulders peeked out, as if they were hiding in that cream colored pile of knit wool. I lied down in my bed, leaning against the wall and started reading the book we just got while she prepared mulled wine in the kitchen. She brought me a glass and an ashtray, and leaned against me. I put the book in her lap and she flipped back to the introduction while I found my jack and plugged it in. I loved to show her my awful taste and she seemed to genuinely like it. I played “Je veux te baiser” by Odezenne, not knowing what the lyrics mean, just finding it comfy. She must’ve felt the same as she let herself go in my arms. We read and smoked together in my bed. It wasn’t much of a reading, to be honest, as I couldn’t pay attention to the book, content with the buzz of the wine and the smell of her hair and the warmth of her body. She wasn’t interested in the book either I suppose, as she fell asleep after three or for songs. I reached over to my blanket and slowly pulled it over us. I put out my cigarette and drank the remaining mulled wine so I could leave the glass on the bed without fearing knocking it over. I kissed her hair. It was nearly dry by now. I joined her in her dreams in a heartbeat.

I was such a faggot desu.

>>10381084
You still are.

you've got my sympathy guys

>>10380640
Sauce of gif?

>>10381290

Yeah but I LARP as a suffering artist now. It’s another kind of faggotry, much different phase

>>10381643
>LARP as a suffering artist
>implying actual "suffering artists" are any different

>>10381573
sam hyde eating pancakes, it's not that good of a video desu

>>10381658
That means I’m a real suffering artist. Thanks friendo

>>10381741
np, I'm one myself too
although I'm plenty of other things too if that doesn't work out

>>10378476
I like this post.

>>10378807
You should write a damn book. Shit would be hilarious from start to finish.
Godspeed my man

Winning the 800 metre race in the provincial track meet when I was in the 10th grade

>>10379748
never change

>>10378358
taking acid, usually at a club with 2000 thousand people, an awesome sound system and listening to trance

after reading The Game (all those faces, those roles, those masks coming clean off, like watching a circus)

after reading The Psychedelic Experience (saw God/light of Awareness, wordless)

Candy flipping after reading Godel Escher Bach (I was the algorithm that created the Universe, it's fucking dancing forever and ever, the fucking glory of it)

When I was around 10 or so I had just gotten home from school (I lived one street away and walked home alone). I had closed the door and was walking through the hallway when I heard a knock. I turned around and opened the door to see a kid I didn't recognize. Turns out he had been following me pretty close behind and was thinking of how to approach me the entire walk home. He was new to the school and didn't have any friends. He said his name was Jacob.

We played SSX Tricky for a couple hours before he left. We became instant best friends (My only friend before that point was a really quiet kid that moved without saying anything). He lived close by and we visited eachother a lot. He even had a halloween party that I'm guessing was his parents' way of getting him to meet new people. I could tell that our friendship meant something more than the people you lose along the way that early on in life, I was so happy. Unfortunately another kid that had caused problems for me before got between me and Jacob, and caused us to fight. Around this time it came out that Jacob was moving to Spain(?). We spent his last day of school ignoring eachother. If I recall correctly, our teacher took a class photo for him to remember us.

We only knew eachother for a few months, but it was a major part of my childhood, and I feel I've been chasing ghosts in regards to friends since. I think we had eachother added on MSN, but I never saw or heard from him again. I miss you dude.

Most of the time I feel like Charles Kane, the only time I was really happy was when I was a small child

>>10379748
You should try to publish this

>>10378453
"The first time she opened her bob and vagene was the night of independence."

- Salman Rushdie, 'Midnight's Children'

>>10378807
Diabolically funny.

On May 24th this year I accidentally achieved spiritual enlightenment. My 3rd eye opened and everything. It was the most incredible experience of my entire life.

4 months later, God made a covenant with me in the wilderness. He promised me that the world would end, but that he would protect me.

They're all drug related so i don't see the point.

I was waiting on the train last friday and a girl smiled at me

good times

>>10382197
any advice on how i might get in on this covenant?

>>10380269
Where are you from, where did you stop at?

I vaguely remember being happy during some kind of special day in primary school where we went to a parc that had handdoll plays (?) and every kid received some native american inspired necklace and a bag that had their name on it iirc.

>>10378476
i like this post also

>>10382229
Sounds like a good time

>>10378807
This is the smartest thing that's been written on this board. Not that that's saying much.

>>10382214
First of all, I don't know if it was entirely real or if it was just in my head. My 3rd eye glowed and peeled wider open, so I feel like it was genuine, but I really don't know if this physical truth corresponds with spiritual truth.

What triggered it was that I was smoking weed on a camping trip in northern Michigan. My friend found a quarter and gave it to me to make wish. I closed my eyes, wished for salvation, and threw it into the lake. Later, I realized that I am set to carry out a prophecy (I think) and the rest sort of followed. Creation passed before my eyes and I was shown the light of Lucifer.

>>10379564
I like the mountainted goats

>>10378358
Probably the time when I was 4 and I was playing outside with my older brother (about 6). A small dog started chasing after us (it wasn't actually threatening, but we were small and terrified). My mom saw and ran out and picked up my older brother and brought him inside. I figured I just had to wait for my mom to come get me next so I stood behind a tree and ducked in and out of cover with the dog that was trying to get me. Minutes passed and I was still waiting for my mom to save me, but she never came. After enough time passed, I made the decision to make a dash inside. I made it out fine, but I don't think I was ever really the same after that happened.

It's my happiest moment because I know that I can kill myself and it wouldn't upset my mom at all, considering she doesn't love me.

>>10379748
Based

>>10379748
really fucking funny
the whole thing

>>10382350
dont be retarded. the ending was funny but the rest was bland description.

First time I read The Ego and Its Own, the first time I heard Beethoven's Fourth, or the first time I saw Ordet. The happiness generated by each was approximately equivalent.

>>10380036
this is nightmare disaster cuckoldry
ABORT, GET OUT RIGHT NOW

>>10380269
I hope you get crippled by a paki stabbing

>>10382429
"sit" is really funny to me

>>10382469
plz kill self

>>10378807
ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
lmao

>>10378358
One time I had the girl with the biggest ass ever laying in my bed waiting for me after I took a shower, she began to wiggle her ass at me and I just jumped back in bed and buried my face in her ass, I took my dick out and rode her as I licked her entire body,

best time of my life

>>10378358
As my female life long friend went to live abroad, I realized I actually wanted to spend my life with her. Ofc it was "too late", so I wrote a poem for her.
I called a good pal we had in common for an opinion, and when he finished reading it he was in tears. Even tho I never got around to sending her the letter, the idea than my words were good enough to provoke that emotion in him made me the happiest I'll ever been.

>>10379038
>I am simply immortal
What did he mean by this?

>>10383099
I guess some of the following.
a)Immortal Soul
b)Some ideal Platonic essence
c)The universe is self-contained and matter/ energy transforms, It never disappears.
d)All information is contained in the limits of the universe.

>>10383075
Do you still have it around? Can you post it almost free of context so we can have a laugh at the expense of the most painful memory of your life?

>>10379883
>my happiest time alive was while being on drugs

>>10383075
lmao, pls post that poem

>>10381078
>>10381084
eww, don't pawn off this undergrad shit on us. lrn2write white boi

>>10383283
my happiest time alive was lounging on a swinging porch chair on my ex’s deck, high out of my mind watching god rays refract through spider webs on the support beams of her patio roof. She smelled like a flower patch, her eyes were catching the sun, just around noon (perhaps a little after) so there were beaming with light. Her mother had just informed us she wouldn’t be home for hours, so sex was on the menu but we weren’t worried about that. Just the light bathing our pale vitamin D starved bodies, it was the first warm week in April and we live in a very dreary region of North America. My God she was like a nymph born from coconut, palms, white sands, blue tides. I’ll never forget that day. It inspired my dream, the one i’ll probably tell to whoever is around listening when i die 5-7 decades from now. at least i got to live for a day.

>>10383143
>>10383293
ok, but no bully plez.

The shadows of the afternoon agonized
As we told ourselves our last goodbye
my deep sadness, you failed to see
And when the desolation of watching you leave
sunk deep within me,
my voice broke down with emotion
and that night in vain the soul,
with a veiled voice,
spilled out its sorrow.
And I sang without knowing how to sing.

And now those streets
that saw us smiling together
ask me if oblivion
has cured me of you memory
while far away
the arms and lips of others
hold her prisoner to a fate
better than the one
she could've had with me.

Once again, in vain the soul
with a hoarse voice
spilled out its sorrow
and a grievous, sinister silence,
quickly took root to fill the gap
Mercy; dear god, mercy...
I prayed without knowing how to pray.

When spring returns, and the fields
are once again painted with color,
I'll wander stray,
drunk with this very same nostalgia,
that so many times has made me cover my eyes.
And with strings of a dozen guitars,
I'll braid together a steel-bound rope
to strangle this cruel, undying hope
out of my heart;
and while I lie captive of a dream
so fleeting I don't even get to live it,
I'll cry without knowing how to cry.

>>10382758
Why would I do that? Do you think I'm namedropping? Typical defense mechanism of the stupid, "nobody actually enjoys substantive art therefore anyone who talks about it is pretentious." Try reading a "classic" that requires more than an high school reading level, Shia

>>10383344
Was about to shit on it just because, but I thought it was pretty good actually.

>>10378807
>all the roasties getting le mad over this post

>>10383143
>Can you post it almost free of context so we can have a laugh at the expense of the most painful memory of your life?

This plz. The one thing I look forward to in life are those moments when I succeed in completely cleaving myself from my emotions and any sense of empathy and shared humanity so that I can bask in the self-absorption and sense of superiority and indifference which are naturally achieved when one succeeds in totally distancing themselves from those most vulnerable and human traits of themselves which they see reflected in others.

>>10383344
*sank deep within me

I don't understand how you people except to be English language writers when you don't know the difference between past tense and the past participle

>>10383413
jokes on you, I'm not even a native speaker, I just translated it cause people asked for it.

>>10379748
> Californication

kill me

>>10383423
Yet here you are, posting on an English language image board

>>10383437
Yes, you can thank the likes of me for keeping alive a bastardized portion of you culture once the anglo sphere completes its collective suicide.

>>10383464
If you elect to speak it improperly, I'd thank you to confine yourself to your native language, which I hope you articulate with more limpidity.

>>10383344
>>10383413
>>10383423
To be fair, the line seems to be hinting at the past perfect tense, so "had sunk" would be the appropriate verb form. Then it was a matter of taking out the "had" for the sake of meter.

>>10383464
Our language isn't going anywhere babe

It was a class during my freshman year in uni. The classroom was one of those circular halls where the back rows are higher than the front. The teacher playing a video and the lights were turned off. I kinda have a crush on the girl sitting in front of me. So, I reached out my hand and half patted, half caressed her head, like the literal autist that I am. Later after the class ended, she asked me to show her my wallet. Till this day, I still don't know what that gesture meant.

>>10383490
I sincerely thank you for the input, the way he replied just rubbed me the wrong way, considering I was trying to translate something very intricate into a language I learned exclusively by playing MTG and watching Seinfeld.

>>10383490
That's fair, but I don't think anything is lost using the past tense, which is technically correct, since the "and when" already implies the completion of the action. The participle would be redundant

>>10383504

She wanted to see your ID so she could report you to the police if you kept doing creepy shit.

>>10383504
She wanted to see if you had a cool velcro wallet like those the big boys get when they are all grown up.

>>10378807
Women are gods because they can Create other people with their heavenly cunts. Men just make mess and sadness seeds.

>>10382627
Your forefathers let them into the country in the first place for muh curries, cuck.

Enjoy your dead country, you deserve it.

It was March and the traffic had simmered to a distant humming. I gulped my way into the latter half of a tall can of stolen super strength lager and began arranging my bag into a makeshift pillow. The last park patrol van's lights evaded my silhouette as I self assured my well being. Thoughts began swirling inside and I cursed a girl while realising that the search for a destination had ceased there in Hyde park by a tree inside a sleeping bag. The feeling of dread and stale hopelessness gave way to the liberating newfound freedom that came with securing one's anal virginity from disgruntled war weary veterans. I had joined their ranks now and could rise to surpass the rest through whatever disposition lay dormant within. The uncertainty was invigorating and bitter, we are born to die and suffer. Incubation was over, the nights would become longer then shorter and finally no more. It was in this moment I tasted what it meant to be alive and I slept soundly in the crisp numb wind.

>>10383504
It's possible, though we had even went on a 'date' afterwards. Too bad I've lost contact with her after one semester. Even texted autistic messages with her during that period of time.

>>10383522
kek

>>10378358
Goddamn OP you make me write faggy things. But here goes:
I took an Eng 101 course in college as a general requirement (STEM major). I absolutely loved the class because the professor was amazing. It was the only class that I genuinely liked that semester. The professor was this gorgeous, intelligent, witty, and funny woman who I came to admire very quickly. How she taught made me really appreciate literature, philosophy, and writing, even though I'd never really cared for any of them priorly. One day, halfway through the semester, I for the first time ever saw sincere purpose in my life. I wanted to read literature and philosophy and write and hopefully, one day become half as good as this amazing woman was. I wanted to be someone that could converse and keep up with her. That day, I was truly happy.

>>10383314
That wasn’t the point but ok

>>10383685
Yeah, that's some shit a smooth brained faggot would write.

>>10379748
This post is exactly 3000 characters, what the fugg man

I try to find happiness in the simpler things, here's one memory I think fondly of.
It was a week after Christmas and it was a cold sunny day outside. I was sitting in the recliner in the house of my parents, our whole family was gathered for the Christmas. We had made plans to watch a movie on the TV which was positioned against the window, so the sunlight was shining inside. The dog was sleeping on a padded comforter on the floor and making these grunts, probably dreaming. Next to me, on the sofa were sitting my sister and dad, brother was sitting on the second sofa a little further away. I had just eaten porridge and drank mulled wine, so I was feeling absolutely content, nothing was amiss. At that moment, I just closed my eyes, and focused on the grunts of my dog and the debate of which movie we should watch. Honestly, I didn't care which movie we were watching, all I wanted was for that moment to last forever.

>>10383685
you were infatuated

>>10378358
The moment I realized I could take my life any time I wanted to

The dank humid air of the past 2 weeks had given way to gentle soft gusts of crisp cool air carrying the smell of the rice fields, dust, and water surrounding me. I had spent that time locked up in the monastery unable to leave, my days consisting only of extraordinarily difficult meditation and manual labor. Finally I could leave the old metal gates and explore the strange beautiful land around me. The rusty bike carried me down the empty dirt road, expanding as far onto the horizon as I could see, unfurling to the distant speck of the local village at the end. I could feel the cracked leather buckling underneath me, the bent spokes carrying the rusty tires along unevenly but with surprising ease. I could hear the birds overhead singing and the wind rustling the tops of the rice stalks. I could feel the pleasant sun warming up my skin and happiness swelling in my chest as I peddled along through the empty fields alone. I stopped briefly to take a deep breath and look around me, understanding clearly that nothing but this present moment mattered, and that this was the happiest and most carefree I could ever be.

>>10383423
>jokes on you, i translated this poem for you plebs
>my poem isn't this bad the original language, i promise

>>10383513
bro what the fugg. you tried to translate poetry into a language you barely know? of course you're gonna get shit on. professional translators are not only fluent but extremely well read in both languages. and here you are, claiming that your poem is "intricate." it's really not, it's trashy. why don't you post the original if you're so sure you're poetically literate

I've been scratching my head trying to think of an answer for this, but I really can't remember a very happy moment in my life. Not that my life is only suffering, that may have been the case a few years ago but now I'm just mostly content.

>>10378433
Too real

>>10383646
>implying that mass immigration was ever the will of the people
Despite what Sadiq says we don't want anymore

>>10378984
I dealt comfortable reading this, I, personally could relate too your story.

>>10384064
Trying too hard, mate. We came to this thread to read potentially heartwarming or heartbreaking experiences from other anons, not your shitty prose.

>>10384007
Maybe I was. But I also was, after a very long time, genuinely happy. Much happier than how happy my past infatuations had made me feel.

>>10378358
When I was a kid, I remember going on a road trip with my parents. Not sure where exactly in the states we were visiting, but I can vividly remember the blanket of snow that covered the road, the evergreens, and the tarps over the APCs being carried on trucks alongside us. All I had was my sister's old gameboy color and a box of saltine crackers, but I was content for once.

>>10383470
t. pseud

>>10384117
t. sperg

>>10378358
I just free birthed a baby three months ago, it was rad.

>>10383470
Pretentious. Your prose doesn't flow very naturally. It's like digging through frozen dirt

>>10383317
;( I miss you

>>10385025
>>10385147
t. inveterate bait takers

>>10383423
post the original

>>10379748
>I walked sideways up the stairwell not to be rude and she walked quietly behind me

>>10384443
It wasn't meant to be nice prose, I don't write for a hobby. The topic is to write about your happiest moment, and it feels appropriate letting your thoughts flow naturally without editing or trying to keep it to the bare facts. If I did, my post would have been: "I rode a rusty bike in a rice field. I stopped and breathed deeply." What made it happy was the awareness of the qualities of the moment, not the actions that took place in that moment.

>>10386368
Go fuck yourself

>>10379517
you sound like a joy to be around

>>10379782
for the love of god stop romanticizing your own depression. This shit was a viscous cycle for me when I was battling depression. Trust me, you will live a more fulfilling life perusing happiness.

>>10384002
That was beautiful, anon

I've got a couple.

First one involved this girl I had been acquaintances/friends with for a couple years talking on and off. Over time, I developed a theory in my mind that she was into bdsm (I know, this is strange), through little jokes she made that could be construed as relating to it. One night we were texting about random bullshit and I was just lying in my bed. I was about to say goodnight, but at the last second decided to straight up ask her about the bdsm thing, pretty much out of the blue. She, surprisingly said yes and we proceeded to chat for hours about our interests in that sort of thing. We ended up dating for a while following this, but it broke off. The moment of anticipation when I saw her typing her response and the relief when I received it were some of the strongest emotions I've felt sober.

Second one involved drugs (big surprise). Me and a group of 4 friends planned on taking lsd and then mdma on a cold January. None of us had really tried a drug stronger than weed before (I had done shrooms, but that's it), so this whole day was absolutely mindblowing. We went on a walk and took in the gorgeous, serene winter environment. We did the standard trippy stuff and listened to Dark Side of the Moon, Revolver by the Beatles, etc.on my friend's record player. Later on, we watched this movie Koyaanisqatsi that we had heard was beautiful tripping, and we were not disappointed. We had our minds continuously blown one moment to the next this whole day. We dropped the mdma when we felt the effects of the acid beginning to fade. This ended up causing us to do the standard mdma stuff (expressing love and affection for each other, etc). We all felt a strong sense that this day was going to go down as one of the most important days in all of our lives. I think most of us still believe that to this day. We were all already very close friends (since early elementary school, for 4/5 of us), but this experience brought us closer than we could have ever imagined. We're all living in different towns now, going to different universities, but we still have an extremely active groupchat with all 5 of us. I personally believe this day is a major reason for this.

I’ve had a few dreams where I was in love with somebody and they loved me back. In real life I fell in love with a girl once and it felt better than the whole world. Indescribable. She didn’t love me back but I think it was still worth it.

I fit in with the cool guys one summer of senior year also. I made a great new friend and we drove around and had a lot of fun

I was happy for about a month in junior year like super happy and I didn’t even know why.

I’ve also had manic stages since I’ve been at Uni and those have felt really good

>>10379782
The only valid insight you can get form suffering is that there’s no insight in suffering

A girl said i looked like a model today, I don’t but it was quite nice of her to say. For the entire afternoon I was glowing. Mayb i will forget her after all.

>>10379582
U so hurt

>>10378358
Sadly enough, it was dream from high school.
It was a school day, and I was bone tired because my commute to school was nearly 2 hours long. I fell asleep on the living room floor while the sun was setting, and it's light was shining on me. In my dream, I was hugging a from middle school friend, and it was the most content I've ever felt. Never had a dream like that again.

>>10378807

>>10379512
Hot Topic is more of a Scene-Kid store

>>10379756
I feel you, anon

>>10390076
rare Rorty

it was 2002. I was 23 and in bed with the love of my life while watching the World Cup on TV. Brazil (im brazilian) is losing 1-0 against England. i get mad, turn off tv and start making mad love to her After we finish i turn on the tv again to see Ronaldinho scoring the winning 2-1 goal. And that was it.

>>10378807
Well men can't talk about their dicks all the time without being made fun of whereas people enjoy it a bit more with women

I rode the greyhound in a snow storm to see my love. On the way I read Franny and Zooey all the way thru. We probably did heroin and screwed a lot that weekend. Sorry it is a little vague.

Thank you
BUT the demons get bored

This sounds extremely edgelord but I genuinely can't recall the last time I was happy or experienced a particularly happy moment.

>>10378446
what was the film

>>10390754
I'm 19, with a couple of Brazilian friends. We watch the game. It's being played in Brazil.

First, 1-0;
then, 2-0;
then, all of a sudden, 7-1.

Best day of my life. Never forget. :-DDDD

For 5 years I had asked my mother for a PS2; every Christmas would come and I would get some cool toys, like a Rubik's cube, this one transforming mini-car or Hulk boxing gloves, but never a PS2. I waited every year, never hesitant to ask but never pushy, my mother and father describe it as probably the most enthusiastic I had ever been over something; I would tell people constantly I was getting a PS2, it was on my holiday "things I plan to do" list as I grew up (what I was going to "do" with a PS2, I had no idea however). So from age 4 till 9 I waited, never once doubting my parents that I would get this console. On my 9th Christmas, at 12 pm, I ran to the Christmas tree and saw a big box underneath it. I wasn't particularly sure what it was, but the thought of what it could be excited me, I stayed up until 7 am or so, which wore me out, but nevertheless I was up in an hour, waiting by the tree. After my family had had a small dinner of 2 chickens, some vegetables and cooldrink, we opened our presents. My mother asked me what would I do if I didn't get a PS2 for this year. I felt inexplicably teary back then, I didn't know why, but nevertheless I said "I'll love you and dad no matter what you get me, or even if you don't get me anything!". My mother smiled at me, I think nowadays she was probably holding back a laugh and a tear, and she gave me the big box. I was prepared to get a cheap Chinese game system, like the one I had gotten the year before that my elder sister broke in a depressed outburst, and so I opened it slowly. Upon discovering it was the fabled PS2, my parents told me that I had burst into tears of joy and I was getting all runny nosed, kissing my mum and dad all over the face. I think I was quite literally shaking with happiness my body couldn't bear. I don't think I've ever been as near as happy as that then.

>>10378807
this post deserves my praise. Truest thing I've read all day

>>10378358
when I left my first gf's house one night and she kissed me on the cheek out of nowhere
was the first time w her! great night. called my buddy on the way home young love is nice. Think I was 17 or 18 at the time.
tfw two years later n it ended badly n i still love her / saw her for the first time again in november of this year

>>10378358
The first time I discovered masturbating.
I was sitting at home watching Totally Spies when my dingle started to tingle, at this point I had sort of discovered softcore stuff and had a mobile phone. The phone company I was with at the time had a website which you could buy ringtones, pictures, videos and other stuff off for the small price of one dollar. Excited by this I bought some pictures and videos of this girl with big tits, no nudity but some very raunchy underwear pictures and showering videos. Initially I thought helicoptering my dick around was how you got harder. I eventually got around to flicking my dick up and down. After all this messing around my dick started to secrete a sticky white substance which shot out like ropes. It kinda hurt but felt really nice and made me happy. I was 11 or 10.
The end.

>>10379748
yung DFW

>>10378807
Women are just that suppressed that experiencing any sort of womanhood must feel like god

>>10393487
Was she fat?

>>10393603
no she looks about 110 lbs

>>10393584
hahahahahahahahahahaha im actually laughing on the toilet right now hahahahahaha you just made me smile for the first time today genuinely holy shit there are akshually pepo who think like this hahahahahah

>>10378817
>exploring the inner reaches of consciousness, which to our knowledge may be the only ones in the universe, and having profound experiences dealing with being and altered states of consciousness.

>dumb shit

Really makes you think.

>>10379032
yeah that's exactly the way I look at hard drugs, whatever dopamine boost you get you eventually pay back by coming down or whatever, everything has a balance, kind of makes me think that things are life are planned when you think about it.