/lit/ - Literature

Run.

>/lit/ wisdom

Why does it matter? Move on.

Personally, I would end the relationship. I’m not going to get into any details that complicate or blur your personal decision, but this is something that effects not only you on a visceral level, but also myself reading it. That such a loving and kind person (supposedly) can either be duped or knowing degrade herself like that elite a certain disgust in the pit of my stomach that you probably know all too well.

Once a feeling like this has been elicited it is almost impossible to get rid of as it is something that serverely violates your moral instinct.

I would just drop the relationship and find somebody else, the infatuation and love you are feeling will eventually pass and be transferred onto somebody else in a different way.

Oh fug, is it because women don't know how men really feel about most sex that they think it's okay to be sluts?

>Her, and three men. I feel a wave of agony rush rush over my body as I even type this.
She should have not told you that. There was no good reason for telling you that.

>Is it my pride? Is it my heart?
It's your pride. You are not longer capable of believing your one measly dick will ever satisfy her now, not really. Perhaps not again, unless you go through a cuck phase and adjust to your new identity.

To be honest OP she sounds like a girl who is desperate to be married, and she found her sucker. And you don't sound ready to be married to her, if this one thing is causing you so much concern. How much /pol/ have you consumed in your lifetime? Too much, perhaps.

If you find you can't continue with her and break it off, don't feel too bad. Like you, I found my summit girl once. The girl who cries after sex because she's just so happy and in love. I found someone who was so overinvested in me to be creepy and codependent. She had no idea that she could not cure me of my existential pain, or that she was a fool to try. Just leave this girl behind with her delusions of what woman and man relationships should be. I did, and I'm perfectly happy today to be not legally and financially bound to someone.

How old are you? I'm guessing 20s. You can wait. A real woman is out there for you somewhere.

>three men
Oosh. Got to dump the thot. Shame her and make sure she realizes that there is no excuse for her hoedom, with a straight face and no emotion, swallow your pride, and move on.

>>10369923
I don't know if this anon means give up the gal or accept her, warts and all. But this being /lit/, I'm going to bring up Ulysses here. Leopold Bloom is an icon for cucked men everywhere because he ultimately chooses forgiveness over spite. Think long and hard on this, anon. Do you want to give up the kind of relationship you just described?

>>10369908
What disturbs you more, that she was capable of such an act, or its very occurrence?

>>10369923
>Why does it matter?
huh I didn't know there were women on /lit/

If everything you said is accurate and you're not just nutting yourself over some girl, is this that big of a deal breaker? If so, I think you've got to ask yourself if you actually love her. Sorry.

>>10369908
Break it off she sounds like a psychopath trying to trick you, if someone is too good to be true they usually are.

>>10369908
Be in a foursome with her.

In all seriousness, anon, either accept her or if you can't deal with it, recognize that it's not truly love. Read about dealing with jealousy. I'm sure there are things you've done in the past that others would consider unsavory. Try to get over yourself. If you do love her that is.

Whatever you do, don't remain in the relationship, growing ever more bitter and abusing her passive aggressively. Or just aggressively. She doesn't deserve that and neither do you. Do what you do because you care about her, not because you're scared to tell the truth or be alone, or are afraid you won't fall in love again.

It's ok to not know what to do, too.

Good luck, anon. I hope whatever happens leaves you both happy, safe, and sincere.

you spent the first 3/4 of the post describing an ideal angel of a woman. When you discovered her past you experienced cognitive dissonance (it doesnt fit my image of her). Your image of her is not who she is. You fell in love with a hollow image of a girl. The fact that you guys are honest is promising I hope you can get past this anon. There are no angels.

>>10369937
It's very occurrence. And thinking about it. And I think what disturbs me most is that I don't know how to feel about it. Part of me is screaming inside. Part of me doesn't know why. Part of me is confused. I'm just so confused and bewildered.

>>10369943
I am >>10369930 and if I found out my gf had been with three dudes I'd be wanting to get with her and her friends. There's nothing wrong with sex, or enjoying sex. It's great fun. OP's problem is he thinks his gf is icky for having committed some kind of sin that exists only in his own mind. He's not ready, and tbrqhwyf her OTHER behavior -- the insane emotional attachment, not the foursome -- would send me running for the hills. OP thinks that kind of "love" is a good thing. OP is wrong. Pic related, it's OP.

>>10369949
I fell in love with what was in front of me. I fell in love with the heart and the soul and the face in front of me.

What is who she is anyways? What IS someone? Is that part of who she is? Or maybe who she is decided that was not for her and that she wants this. fuck's sake I'm so mixed up right now

>>10369952
Wait wait wait so hol up hol up ayo hol up lemme get this straight hol up hol up she was in a foursome BEFORE this relationship you two have or DURING? Cuz if it was Before my dude you had better lower your expectations my dude because a woman who's a perfect Saint and angel is gonna be in a convent, not in a relationship lol ya feel me ukoudvkirdbkoodhmiooprsb

>>10369908
How many guys total has she had sex with in her life?

>>10369908
You’ll always feel superior to her, clearly. So, the only course of action is to break things off. From personal experience relationships with completely uneven sexual histories cause massive tension. If you haven’t had this kind of wild multi-partner sex multiple times yourself its always going to bother you. You’ll have it in the back of your head when you have kids too. Breaking it off will cut off an further injury to your psyche. Extreme, visceral pain from a trusted partners betrayal, in this case her value was misrepresented as a moral agent, is totally natural and is a sign you’re a healthy human. Have fun with that

>>10369955
OP here. Let me tell you something. I've been in an open relationship, and weird sexual encounters, and I've been in loving, exclusive relationships, and the pleasure that you get from a loving exclusive relationship is far more refined and delightful than all the other weird shit. I choose love.

>>10369908
I would leave her. Her innocence has been completely destroyed. For some reason women today think that they can be complete sluts without detriment to their value as wives.

>>10369955
>OP's problem is he thinks his gf is icky for having committed some kind of sin that exists only in his own mind.
>sin that exists only in his own mind
I hate you people

>>10369963
It was years before she met me.

>>10369964
Not many for her age. Less than the amount of women I've been with.

>>10369976

enjoy cervical cancer.

>>10369971
>I choose love.

Then choose love. /thread. But it's not that easy for you apprently. Why are you bothered by something that happened before your relationship with her? If this thread is sincere and not bait, I think you're looking for an excuse to drop her. And you would be right to, because what I said about you forever being concerned about your ability to please her and what >>10369966 said about tension is absolutely true. Resentment grows like mushrooms, family.

>>10369982
Lmao was that the worst con you could think of?

>>10369925
Apparently, when she was doing it, she knew it wasn't for her.

>>10369986
She's just a monkey, and so are you. Both doomed to die. The level of psychic agony expressed in OP is proof enough for me she is not right for you. And more likely than that: you are not ready for "the one" of your measly lifetime until you deflate your crazy monkey expectations.

>>10369977
it sounds to me like your issue is you think she degraded herself either beyond repair or that she knowingly left behind any chance of morality. She also seems to feel guilty, so maybe she isn't beyond repair? What is her personality like in regard to self-abasement, prior to this revelation?

>>10369908
>In a way, I asked
What did you ask?

>>10369983
This thread is sincere, and I'm not looking for an excuse to drop her. I'm looking for an excuse to stay with her and love her.

I have no problem with pleasing her. I've been with plenty of women, and let me tell you that I am confident in my ability to please women. Learn about oral sex. Read multiple books on it. The pleasure you can give someone from this is truly shocking and I really can't imagine a world in which some of the orgasms I have wrought are surpassable.

>>10369977
>OP has fucked more women than his one true love has fucked men, but somehow SHE's the whore because once she fucked three men at the same time

>>10369962
She is someone who makes mistakes and has been through the shit presumably. Not an innocent perfect angel, but a person who loves you. A person who has done something you find disgusting. Have you never done anything that would disgust her? Sounds to me neither of you are pure considering youre on 4chan. Dont think of marriage or kids or anything yet. Dont think of forever. Just continue having fun with her for now and see where it goes. When you think of forever is when her past bothers you most, so just remember: youre dating. Nothing more. Its still early, I know its hard to change how you view someone, but this angelic image has to dissipate.

>>10370006
She doesn't like self-abasement. Doesn't like being dominated. Etc. This subject was quickly broached, because I had been in dominant relationships in the past.

>>10369908
OP what do they think they were calling your girlfriend while they fucked her? That kind of thing implicitly can't be intimate, she was probably just an object, and not even a valued one, I mean you wouldn't even share a fleshlight with another person. Also wonder what kind of dudes rail the same girl, they're gotta be pretty experienced, she was probably barely holding on, and it'd be hard to breath with a dick your mouth because I doubt they just stood around while she got pounded

>>10370010
"Have you ever been in a foursome?"

Jewish degeneracy destroys another one.

Who has the John Green image about Cheerios? Surely that will make you feel better.

>>10370011
>I'm looking for an excuse to stay with her and love her.
Then you're already a cuck. You can't stay with her and keep your pride, silly as I think your pride is. What is causing your revulsion to this foursome revelation? Religious beliefs? Overinflated ego? >>10370013 is keeping it 100, you're a hypocrite who is destroying his "one" chance at happiness.

>>10370024
OP here, I didn't ask this. I asked the kinkiest thing she'd ever done, after she had asked me. It was a response question.

>>10370011
>I really can't imagine a world in which some of the orgasms I have wrought are surpassable
>SHE'S NOT PURE REEEEEEEEE

>>10369908
Why in the fuck do you care? Grow up. People do sex. Big deal. It changes literally nothing about her or how she feels about you. God the idiocy of your self torture over this almost makes me want you to leave her and spare her your infantile self-involvement. God.

>>10369922
spbp

>>10370029
What do you mean I'm a cuck? In your post, you're both insulting me for being disgusted and at the same time telling me I'm a hypocrite for being disgusted.

I know this is not my one chance for happiness. I am no fool. I'm not denying that.

What I'm trying to figure out is whether I am rejecting something good in my life, something loving, because of an irrational devil whispering to me in my head. Thusly, bringing darkness into this world. That's what I'm trying to figure out.

Fornication is always immoral. The opening of "sexuality" that's occurred since the '20's and '60's is responsible for all the ills of modern society, constant perversion has brought decadence and degradation to all of humanity. We will atrophy and die out due to this degeneracy, please stop immediately.

>>10370031
She already wanted to admit it then, asking that sort of question. This is clearly a test for the relationship. PASS THE TEST. I'm surprised to hear she doesn't like being dominated or self abase too much-- that is a very good thing. I think she really loves you, but the last thing I'm unclear on is whether or not she expected you to flip. Was she nonchalant about it "Not being her thing"?

>>10370035
kek, and don't forget:
>>I've been in open relationships
>SHE'S NOT PURE REEEEEEEEE

>>10370037
Best post in this thread.

>>10370039
I'm done giving you serious replies. You're a tard, and so is she for appreciating you.

>>10369908
if she's that in love with you, just talk to her about it made you feel and see what she says. an anonymous board full of people who most likely don't know you or her personally can't decide on an extremely important decision for you. just tell her how you feel yourself.

This thread is making me sad. I hope you two find happiness...I hope we all find happiness.

>>10370059
You must be 18 years old to post on 4chan.

>>10370017
Don't forget the most important question: What ethnicity do you suppose they were?

>>10370044
She was fairly nonchalant, and then when she realized what happened to me, she started crying and basically collapsed, and became very serious about it.

>>10370037
Because, 'what is a person''?

Is she who she is with me now? Because she chose to be this? Then I'm ok.

Or is that a part of her? A part of who she is? Then I'm no ok.

>>10370065
They were white. She is European. Not that this matters, Mr. Racist.

>>10370068
>Or is that a part of her? A part of who she is? Then I'm no ok.
Well the foursome is a permanent part of her memory, her history. It is a part of who she is. She wouldn't do it again, because you said she said it wasn't for her and she knows it would hurt you anyway. Presumably unless you were involved in any future foursome it would be cheating, besides.

>Because, 'what is a person''? Is she who she is with me now? Because she chose to be this? Then I'm ok.
So if she has changed herself from who she was before -- just to be with you <3 <3 <3 -- it's all good? That's pretty scummy of you my man. You are saying you would withhold your love for her unless she meets your expectations of behavior. Repulsive and immature desu. Go back to open relationships.

>>10370072
>Not that this matters

>>10370072
Of course it matters, cuck boy. You think any of this is normal? Do you know why you are triggered like this and experiencing the emotional reaction you are? Because you live in a fucked up, degenerate culture where your women are told that instead of being ladylike and creating babies it's okay to get gang banged then non-chalantly break it to the potential provider cuck (you) to test him.

>>10370080
I'm not saying she changed herself from who she was before. I'm saying she tried it, realized it wasn't for her. So is that a part of who she is, or isn't it. I don't need your answer. I don't give a fuck about what you think. I wanted someone in this thread to inspire me with a solution.

God damn this all

>the posts in this thread.

wow.

>>10369908
nobody's really at fault here. you're not a jealous hypocrite, she's not a big fat whore. you built up your own image in your mind of this woman being the perfect partner, and for her to have engaged in a foursome a couple times in the past is painful as fuck for you because this ideal romantic image you have made of her has been raped and tainted. i went through the same thing with my ex.

either way, it might be wise to break up with her, if only because this "tainted" image of her will probably haunt you for a long time before you're able to get better.

i recommend spending some time by yourself. some deep introspection. read some of jung's works, find why you feel the way you do about sex.

>>10370068
They aren't mutually exclusive. She is both the person she is with you and the person that had a foursome all at the same time. The fact that that causes you any kind of angst means that you are, regardless of age, a self-involved, childish, narcissist who doesn't deserve a partner as generous, honest, and loving as the one you have described.

Have you ever done, thought, or said something that is in contradiction to the person you are now? Well, guess what you are gonna always also be that person. And the one you are now. And a million other yous doing a million other things. Just like her, just like me, just like every other human being that is a messy collection of experience and contradiction and always in a continual process of becoming the next thing they are.

But really. Just leave her. The fact that this causes you angst means that you probably should not bother her or anyone else with your self-involved egoistic conception of partnership except for someone as narrow minded and shallow hearted as yourself.

>>10370084
She can't change the past, fella. Get over your emotional kneejerk reaction and stop polluting /lit/.

>>10369908
Read Infinite Jest

>>10370094
oh yeah keep calling the OP a piece of shit, he'll surely feel better if you keep calling him an egoist narcissist bolshevik proletariat cuckshed swamp janitor

>>10370068
She loves you

Thot patrol when???

OP here. I have had glimpses, flashes in my mind of the capability me getting past this, and conquering this. And leaving it behind. I know it's possible. I know I could do that.

The question is, in doing that, am I weak, or am I strong?

>>10370017
LMAO

>>10370115
You are strong

>>10370107
What do you mean?

>>10369947

SENSIBLE POST

>>10370115
You are a pathetic, weak man.

>>10370121
I think you're right. But this would no masculine strength. This is no manly strength. This would be spiritual strength.

>>10370115
alright now you're just being melodramatic. i can see why you're being upset over this now, you're in love with the idea of love, not with her.

man just break up with her at this point. spend some time alone so you can get over this twisted image of sex in your head.

>>10370115
>The question is, in doing that, am I weak, or am I strong?
Why are strangers opinions in the matter of your relationship with "the one" worth anything to you?

>>10370128
You think I am a weak man for asking this or that I would be a weak man in moving past her history and leaving it behind?

>>10370080
Are you a woman?

>>10369962
There is no permanent self, stable, unchanging. It's unsettling because if someone could change in a dimension you find so drastic then it could happen again. So the fear and disgust you have is that the "person" you see in front of you is not a secure entity that will remain unchanging throughout your life. And it's not. People change, life is scary.

>>10370132
I am in love with the idea of love, but she is a perfect candidate. You really think I should break up with her?

>>10370134
I could give a fuck less about stranger's opinions. Ultimately, I'll do what I choose. I was hoping for insight from strangers to inspire me with something.

>>10370080
>You are saying you would withhold your love for her unless she meets your expectations of behavior. Repulsive and immature desu
What's repulsive and immature is that she willingly degraded herself, twice. OP is emotionally mature to pine for purity, that is the only beatific stance to assume in this wretched life. OP is right to walk away, and reserve his love for something purer. Withholding love from the slampig will be a valuable lesson to her. OP, you should also cut contact with her, and ask her not to contact you. It'll hurt tremendously, and she will invade your thoughts daily for years, but you will pass through this fire with strength. She will breakdown and contact you through all this, and you'll desire deeply to forgive and reach out with warmth. Only reply to let her know you are not thinking about her. This will be a lie of course, but a noble one.

>>10370137
No, I'm a man who values a woman as my equal in a romantic relationship. If I accept her as anything less, it would debase me.

>>10370130
Spiritual strength is what the guys before you didn't have if she is with you now. She's about to lose her spirit too if you cave in on her; that would likely ruin her far worse than anything in her past.

>>10370136
You're a weak man for not telling this max skank girlfriend of yours that her behavior is disgusting and to never contact you again.

>>10370143
t. autistic Catholic larping NEET

>>10370142
If you are this bent out of shape about her sexual history you should not be attempting to have an adult partnership of any kind until you go see a fucking sex therapist or something that can help you develop a considerate, mature understanding of sex, intimacy, and relationships. You are not capable of being a good partner in a healthy adult relationship right now.

>>10370142
if you know you're in love with the idea of love, YES, you absolutely should break up with her. your own ideas of love will taint whatever relationship you are in because you will impose these imaginary, subjective ideas on what a person or a relationship should be because of your love, and your imagination will always conjure a more perfect image than anything reality could ever muster, and so in some way you will always feel defeated, lost, and hurt.

it's okay to see love in a romantic or a poetic way, but don't actually believe in that shit, it does nothing but hurt everyone you're around.

>>10370148
The cells that composed her body at the time have been 100% replaced

>>10370157
Sure. But the moral sin has not? And the memory has not. What the hell are you trying to even say, anon.

>>10370143
I just don't agree with you. You really are talking about bringing darkness into this world. Something I don't want to do.

>>10370150
What do you mean?

>>10370148
Jesus. You're more far gone than I thought. She doesn't want to be your equal, guy, she wants to be dominated. That's why she let 3 guys roast her in the first place, and it's probably why she told you about it, because she doesn't find you dominant enough and wants to test you. Do you know anything about women?

>>10370155
t. a woman

>>10370157
Not the neural cells holding the memory of her gangbang

>>10370155
Shut the fuck up mate. It's not abnormal for somebody to be concerned about the girl they love getting gangbanged

>>10370164
If you're so concerned with moral sin, ask yourself whether she wants forgiveness from you, and if she lives her life in accordance to that. Seems pretty simple imo.

>>10370173
to be fair it's one thing to be concerned, it's another to be as devastated as OP is.

OP, have you ever considered looking at this rationally?

You're too emotionally attached to this. And the person who's the most emotionally attached is the person who gets hurt the most in a relationship, and for the least meaningful things as well.

The point is that it only matters, it only makes you feel all of this, if you are emotionally attached to the relationship, if you're not, you don't care.

I say move on so you can measure how you deal with it for a while. If you can't bear this emotionally, then break up and stop bearing that weight for the sake of your mental health and your emotional stability. Otherwise you're going to be emotionally unstable and live a period of your life that will be like shit for the the most part. It will make you become self destructive.

>>10370169
>She doesn't want to be your equal, guy, she wants to be dominated.
We're talking about relationships, not hookups. She tried being a sub, didn't like it, and stopped. Poor bait my man.

>>10370072
>Not that this matters, Mr. Racist
Lmao I wonder what it feels like to be this

>>10370155
Are you a woman? I feel like only a woman could be this insensitive to the feelings a guy might experience in this situation.

OP here.

>>10370155
I get what you're saying. I don't mind how many partners someone has been with in the past. It's the foursome thing that bothers me. I'm not sure why.

>>10370156
Aspiring to something in the imagination for me, is virtuous and divine. Trying to bring imagination into reality is divine.

>>10370169
She doesn't want to be dominated. I've been with girls who love getting dominated. Trust me, I would know.

>>10370085
>she's not a big fat whore.
Except she is, that's the problem

>>10370183
>I'm not sure why.
I already told you. You're immature, and not really in love with her but rather the idea of love and the pleasure of having someone treat you as well she does.

>>10370166
>I just don't agree with you
You're right OP, you passed the test. I was just projecting anyway. I did something similar and I regret it daily. It weighs like nothing else.

>>10369925
This
Also I am inclined to think this is bait...but idk, it could be true, or adjacent to the truth, e. g. maybe it was actually just a threesome

>>10370179
If you really believe that you have no understanding of female psychology. If she really liked you she would have never mentioned this. She mentioned it because you aren't dominant enough.

OP read this and stfu, or tell me about your mother. This thread is not /lit/.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madonna%E2%80%93whore_complex

>>10370014
/thread

I won't lie. I probably wouldn't get over something like that, but that's because I've been with my gf for 6 years and just the thought of that would be death to me. You've been with this girl 6 months. I know you're in love, and that's fine, but 6 months is not enough time to find out everything you need to find out about someone you're serious about. This is a big step, the first big skeleton to leave the closet. You won't know if you can take it unless you just try to keep it up and see if the natural flow of things makes you relax. Or you could try to talk about this with her in more depth, not the act, of course, but your feelings about it. If she is who you hope she is, she will be understanding, and her acceptance of your hurt pride will help you move on.

You've asked another question in this thread that worries me, though. This "what is a person" thing. You seem to be having trouble coming to terms with the fact that people are not stable, reliable entities, but rather a collage of chaotic moments that ultimately only end up leading to their current character. They're not born into a self, they're made into a self by many things, one of which is fucking up and making terrible mistakes and hurting others. This foursome seems to have been just that for her, a chaotic fuckup. But be reminded that her relationship with you could also end up being just that if just REEEEE and make her feel like a slut and leave. You'll end up as a guy she kinda loved but who was too hurt by her past, so things just couldn't be. She could end up hating you or hating herself or both. Anyway, you'll hurt her too. Is that what you want?

From a /lit/ standpoint, I think you need some Camus, my man. Embrace the chaos and absurdity that comes not just with nature, but with people and their histories. If at the end of the day you guys end up splitting, that's ok, just make sure it's not because you demanded her to be perfect or to be a stable self. Nobody is.

OP here.

I choose love.

Case closed.

/thread

>>10370183
>Aspiring to something in the imagination for me, is virtuous and divine. Trying to bring imagination into reality is divine.

i agree, and that's excellent advice for improving yourself, but it's fucking unfair when you apply it to another person, because you're setting expectations for a normal, flawed human to revolve their life around a certain ideal that a certain person has in their head at a certain time. if her ideal image of a man was one who served in the army as soon as they got out of high school, would you think it fair if she got extremely upset because you had not done so?

what's the kinkiest thing you've done? if you've never had multiple partners in bed before then it's evident that the idea of a gangbang is intimidating and scary simply because its unknown to you, but that's just my thought and not the main point

>>10370183
>She doesn't want to be dominated.
Yes, she does.

>>10369999
Quads of truth, cannot deny.

>>10370197
Wait so are you gonna love the whore or another girl?

>>10370197
welp. rip to this future garbage fire of a relationship

>>10370182
No I'm just a sane adult who isn't completely devastated by the idea of a partner having had group sex before because literally who the fuck cares.

>>10370183
I don't know what to tell you then bud. If you are this fucking devastated by it, and don't have a rational reason why... Just get over it. Or leave. It's that simple. She is always going to have done this. She doesn't need to be forgiven for it, and you aren't making a sacrifice by moving past it. Your partner had group sex twice. I do not understand where this becomes an exisistential drama for you. It's not a big deal.

>>10370201
take le redpill :^)

i am le expert on le female psychology

>>10370191
>She mentioned it because you aren't dominant enough.
Dumb virgin anon gives bad advice, film at 11.

She didn't tell OP about the foursome to manipulate him (and if she did she's crazy). She took a chance and told him the truth because she's trying to build a real relationship and putting a little bit of emotional load on OP is part of that process. She's testing him to see if he's an emotionally mature partner. Big fucking surprise, he's not. And you've revealed yourself to be suspicious of any kind of equal relationship or emotional investment. I hope you find happiness one day, you poor sob.

>>10370197
Whudda cuck. Gotta shame these bitches, not excuse their whorish behavior.

>>10370197
Hope it works out bud.

Now someone for the love of god delete this train wreck.

>>10370175
We're on /lit/. I'd expect people who read and write to be more attuned to feelings and difficult questions than average people.

Average people don't get devastated by things like this because they sweep them under the rug. If your nature is not to do that, but to do the opossite, this is what you get: obsession and guilt and ugliness. But you might also get great art.

>>10370209
>because literally who the fuck cares.
A man would, specifically the man who wants to love her, it's a universal characteristic of human culture. I almost feel bad for you, but hey, go ahead and love the whores of this world, someones gotta do it

>>10370195
Yes, I agree with your conception of an ever changing self. But although we have all this chaos to wade though, and that this leads to who we are, we make choices all along the way, and these choices make us who we are. And these choices, in a way, are who we are.

Whether or not you agree with this, I care not. I wish you peace and happiness and love. Farewell.

>>10370209
i'm really glad that OP made this thread because it reminded me that at one point, I was a self-critical obsessive virgin that had calculated how low the chance of me getting with another virgin was, and how I wrung my hands at the thought of all the chads of the world deflowering all the women of my dreams.

now, i largely don't give a fuck about someone's sexual history, and i feel so much more free because of it. i mean, if someone was a nympho in a bunch of porn videos, i probably wouldn't date them, but those types of people aren't my type anyway. feels good man

>>10369908
Has she somehow ceased being everything she was before you knew this? Are you unable to give yourself to this person 100% because you presumably have had sex with other people?

>>10370213
Responses like this show why white men have fallen so low and are such weak soyboys these days, they really believe this bullshit. Women do not think like this. Read some heartiste.

>>10370082
>>10369908
OP, you might want to consider the test hypothesis. Is she testing to see how much you'll put up with?

I don't get why she told you.
I wouldn't tell my partner about all my past experiences.
But I don't know. It couldn't really have been "not for her"...why would she do it twice. I think a lot of women go through a phase where they just want cock so badly they'll do things like this. She probably liked it well enough, but didn't want to do it again.
Still, she shouldn't have told you. it might be a test.

>>10370220
I agree. Just remember she chose you too.

I wish you well.

>>10370224
pfft. you thought you were talking to OP half the time, when you were responding to me. i'm not surprised you can't track what women think.

>read more of this /pol/ blog
i'd laugh but that's really sad

>>10370219
Group sex has been a part of human culture since literally the dawn of time. I'll continue to live my life not ever giving a fuck that someone has had it because it has no larger significance to their character other than being a descriptor of some sex they had.

>>10370195
This is pretty good advice in general.

>>10370197
cuck

Honestly on a practical level your first priority would be for you and her to get tested for any diseases.

Second priority is honestly assessing if her past actions actually merit a complete 180 view of her. Honestly if she isn't being infidelitous right now it probably means she's finished with that phase of her life.

I mean if it's haunting you that much you can leave her but all that's going to do is cause you to be alone again and leery of any future women you meet. Meanwhile your significant other will probably withhold this information from her next potential partner since it completely scared you away. Causing her to probably surfer mentally.

Listen I totally get not wanting to be with a ""experienced"" woman, but unless you're willing to go to some third world village or nomad tribe and get some virgin girl from there you are going to have to live the fact that a majority of your future partners as you get older will be sexually active in one way or another.

If you love this woman then you should at least be willing to accept her as she is, that being of her past and present self. Surely you don't want to end up as some of the unfortunate souls here who swear away real women because they're obsess with "purity" do you?

>>10370213
>She's testing him to see if he's an emotionally mature partner.
How could you possibly spin this into her favour? Shut the fuck, this thread is pretty eye opening to what kind of men there are out there. I cannot grasp how you could consider getting gangbanged to be a healthy part of womanhood, and then claim it's OPs fault for being "suspicious" about the girl he loves being a whore. Not to sound like /pol/ but this is actually cucked, I just hope I can use this to better myself by knowing these are the "men" I'm competing with.

>>10369908
Hahah holy fuck imagine like 3 dicks in your girl all at once Ahahahah kill youself my man you actually fell for a clearly unstable turbo whore.

>>10370237
this is pretty interesting desu. monogamy is a religious virus, a mental illness infecting the species. just look at all the retarded /pol/ posters spouting off about sin and their bad advice. it's lunacy. when many males share a female, the offspring are protected and provided for by all. the bonds of the group strengthen over time: this is the exact goal of ethnocentrists, and the opposite of the decline they rail against.

>>10370237
the absolute state of the modern men

>>10370236
I knew I was not responding to the OP.

Anyway, this case is cut and dry. The OP's poetic love talk, his emotional reaction, his talk of wanting to be this girl's equal... women don't like this. They view this type of behavior as weak and want men who are dominant and better than them, not an "equal."

OP's gf wanted him to be more dominant so to test him she dropped the news about her previous gangbangs. He reacted like an emotional wuss and failed the test. The relationship is over. You may choose love but she's done with you OP.

>>10369908
this is like when I found out my exgf slept with a black man. that crushing feeling when you realize your expectations were clearly too great and you've been duped by another coal burning skank. I literally know exactly what you felt and are feeling right now op and it sucks but let her go. especially if you are prone to neuroticism it'll just eat away at you. when you lay beside her you'll feel physically repulsed by her and you'll try to rationalize away your perfectly natural feelings but they won't go away.

>>10370246
eh, I don't like emphasizing that OP is responsible for what his gf feels like if they do break up. she might withhold information from her next partner, she might get over OP, you don't really know, it shouldn't really be factored into making a decision.

but it sounds like OP isnt breaking up so. whatever. he can be a passive-aggressive martyr til she ends up breaking up with him.

>>10370248
>How could you possibly spin this into her favour?
By seeing how OP reacts to her news that she participated in a foursome once (or twice). I never said or even implied a gangbang was a healthy part of womanhood, you absolute simpleton. But it is part of her past, and she can't change it. I do think whether she is testing him or baiting him it is morally reprehensible either way. OP should be suspicious, his girl is fucking crazy.

> these are the "men" I'm competing with.
I've gotten plenty, thanks. I'm not interested in women at the moment. Even the best women are manipulators, and the social decline we're experiencing in my country isn't helping either.

>>10369908
3 white bois ain't as bad as 1 nigger. now if it was 3 niggers... that's a monumental problem.

>>10370259
Haha, you have no fucking idea what you're talking about, you naive little fool.

>>10369977
give a number faggot

>>10370271
I think he's a /pol/ tard, and women probably think he's a joke (and some do prefer a simple creature), but he's right. the relationship is doomed whether OP stays or drops her.

>>10370254
>monogamy is a religious virus
I'm I to sensitive for wanting to kill or exile people like you? Islamist extremism sounds better everyday after this kind of degenerate acceleration, "when men share a female", what are you on about literal cuck? Guess what, religion is a human abstraction, and social constructs are more valid than unrestrained behavior, you are the one degenerating

>>10370271
Everything in that post is likely true. Your illusions about the nature of women will not last, amigo.

>>10370213
>She's testing him to see if he's an emotionally mature partner.
This in turn reveals her to be an emotionally immature partner as well, but ok, keep shitting on the poor fuck who got befuddled by a befuddling thing.

>>10370248
>I cannot grasp how you could consider getting gangbanged to be a healthy part of womanhood

Biologically speaking this shit is extremely common in a number of other species. So for a female organism of this planet it is technically healthy.

Mankind has kinda spoiled itself with virtuous love and the concept of fidelity. Practically speaking he should really only worry about disease knowing this now.

>>10370276
OP here. The question was never whether the relationship was doomed. All relationships are doomed. The question was whether I was rejecting beauty in my life.

>>10370284
i'd say your idea of "beauty" died the second you heard she was spitroasted, bucko

>>10369925
>Once a feeling like this has been elicited it is almost impossible to get rid of as it is something that serverely violates your moral instinct.
how do you deal with your feelings and emotions? alcohol? that would explain why you stay bothered. for me personally horrible feelings pop up, then i face them head on and the basically dissipate.

>>10370270
Damn this is true t.bh , I have black friends who "act white" and I wouldn't care about those kind of people, so it's not a race thing? Idk what it is

Just feel it out, with time.. You cannot change the past, you can accept it, and if you can't deal with that the it might be best to move on. What particularly bothers you? Do you find such acts degrading and repulsive? Is it that you don't like the thought of her being with intimate with men other than you? Is a girl with a sexual past a dealbreaker?

>>10370292
how do you 'face' feelings what does that even mean

>>10370280
OP needs to harden the fuck up. He's got his little widdle heart broken because some girl isn't the angel he imagined. He's soft, and not a man despite his proclamations of sexual prowess.

>>10370287
Well, what is beauty? Pretty elusive concept.

>>10370304
it's also subjective. it just sounds to me his idea of beauty is one that never had a gangbang.

>>10370282
Other species often eat their young as well, are you fucking retarded?

>>10370307
but gangbangs are beautiful

OP needs to listen to some Patrice O'Neal, honestly. Sex is a very simple transaction.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpHCsNEyWm4

>>10370265
>eh, I don't like emphasizing that OP is responsible for what his gf feels like if they do break up. she might withhold information from her next partner, she might get over OP, you don't really know, it shouldn't really be factored into making a decision.

That's fine, I'm just putting it out there that actions have consequences. On a purely selfish level concerning himself it's really his call and he's not obligated to look out for well being.

But since he decided to stay with her he should be trying to look forward not backwards right now.

>>10370282
>Biologically speaking this shit is extremely common in a number of other species
That validates it even more you moron, sex for animals is pretty much rape, and it is common for them to eat the newborn so the female will go into heat again. Humans are above animals because of their social constructs, that's what makes them human. This is one of the stupidest things I've seen on this board in a while, I hope you're underage.

>>10370316
amen, patrice was a fucking prophet. rip

>>10370304
Start with the Greeks
>>10370316
>Sex is a very simple transaction.
It absolutely isn't

>>10369955
>and tbrqhwyf her OTHER behavior -- the insane emotional attachment, not the foursome -- would send me running for the hills.
This. OP this is the /lit/ wisdom you search. Neediness isn't cute forever, if you ever move in with this girl you'll know exactly what I mean. I suggest continue the relationship with the intention of learning from the mistakes you're about to make.

>>10370312
No, I'm just stating that as an being of this planet a woman having a foursome is not the biggest issue he could have nor is it some weird anomaly to be scared. Especially if this was in the past.

>>10369908
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16084184

>>10370278
>photo of middle eastern primitives stoning a perfectly healthy uterus to death.
>this is supposed to support his position

/pol/ btfo forever.

>>10370335
That actually wasn't what you were saying, that's what you are saying now. It not being the biggest issue still makes it a big issue, and it is a weird anomaly thankfully, although with people like you maybe that will change.

>>10370335
>an being
It is actually a major red flag to normal people.

>>10370085
>has been in a foursome, twice with the same people
>"she's not a big fat whore"
Sure thing

>>10370347
Not /pol/ desu, just conservative, /pol/ hates muslims because muh race. I can't wait for the Islamic influx to strengthen the right wing

>>10370347
the psychologically reinforcing effect on female sexual restraint is more valuable than the social cost of one less womb

>>10370319
>That validates it even more you moron, sex for animals is pretty much rape,

Not for all animals, just because some species perform such acts does not mean all of them do it.

>and it is common for them to eat the newborn so the female will go into heat again.

Again not all do this and the ones that do it do so to reduce competition.

>Humans are above animals because of their social constructs, that's what makes them human.

We are not "above" animals we are merely animals of abstraction. Our social constructs exist because that's what allow us to best function on this earth.

>This is one of the stupidest things I've seen on this board in a while, I hope you're underage.

It's only stupid because you believe we are somehow more "special" than other species when we still die of diseases delivered to us by insects more than a thousandth of our size.

>>10370359
fwiw, I'm a /k/ommando and welcome actual social challenges arriving on my shore. the left is being driving insane by twitter drama, I can't imagine what actual social problems caused by mass refugees (Ger, Swe style) would do.

I just don't think women should be treated like cattle.

>>10370361
good answer. still a despicable practice. man needs an alternative to women: they are grasping, manipulative, emotional wrecks by their nature and will have no qualms about ruining a mate financially or otherwise if it secures their future.

cheap IVF + refugee surrogates maybe.

>It's only stupid because you believe we are somehow more "special" than other species when we still die of diseases delivered to us by insects more than a thousandth of our size.
Lol

>>10370350
>That actually wasn't what you were saying

It was actually, it's just wasn't explicitly stated as my original post put more priority on the health/ disease side of the issue. Sorry if it wasn't made clear.

Boy this is why you need to be a degenerate nowadays before settling down. I have a GF, but before that I did fucking anything with anyone, man or woman. She brings up any of the kinky shit she did with her one ex, I laugh and tell her 5 stories that make her uncomfortably jealous. My advice is to break this shit off, go be a hedonist for a bit, then try to find a GF.

>>10370365
>Quoting every sentence
>Reddit spacing
>Shitty deterministic argument
>Parentheses around special like we aren't quite obviously distinguished from all other animals
>Claiming humans are no better than animals because disease?
I don't know how you got here but you need to go

>>10370390
>"just become a degenerate so degenerates won't seem so degenerate"

>>10370398
Seems like a valid solution. There is no fighting the degeneration of women. Sure, you can find a traditional, pure gf, but that is considerably more difficult than finding a whore.

>>10370345
I was eating while reading this

>>10370398
>placing the laws and social mores of others in something as personal as sex before your own judgment
>blaming and condemning people who exercise their god-given rights
Late Antiquity's abandonment of the Greeks was a mistake.

>>10370421
> something as personal as sex before your own judgment
Whut? It is my own judgment
>Its a women's right to be a whore
It shouldn't be

May I also get some /lit/ wisdom?

I started a job today after waiting for two months of constant bologna. Instead of the third shift I was told it became merged with second shift. Third shift was guaranteed to me and the day before I get called to work they axe it and merge it into second. We have to work longer than second, though.

I was also told I would be interacting with no one but my colleagues. This turned out to be incorrect too as I had to clear off and clean tables of people's disgusting food remnants like a busboy. I don't think I would have minded as much if there were not people constantly shifting in and out of where I just cleaned making it all annoyingly futile for me. Watching people leave their trash really angered me. After all that I get to the job I was meant to do four hours later. Honestly? Not that bad. My legs are sore as hell but I enjoyed the solitude of cleaning floors in a mall. I attempted to ignore the blaring Christmas music to no avail, but I was able to think about literature and philosophy somewhat uninterrupted.

I'm really debating whether I should quit or not. I want to. I also want to ask if there is literally anything else I could do (aside from pick up vomit due to my dry stomach) in order to never have to deal with the tables again until everyone is gone.

I don't know what to do. The hours alone are really difficult to do and anxiety doesn't help with the people. I like my colleagues, honestly. I hate the job and the others. I also hate that I was basically lied to about my duties and hours. I regret going in today.

>>10370434
This is some of the most banal shit you could have said, got to /adv/

>>10369908
I hope this is bait, if not you're a colossal fucking faggot, just get over it.