/lit/ - Literature

>>21248704
Technically, it's not all fucking banged up like:
>>21248528

So you're far ahead. Your tale telling could make huge gains by engaging the mind's eye more. For example:

>The eerie silence of the forest returned Adah back to her senses.

This is old advice, but Show Don't Tell. So instead of saying it brought her to her senses, you could simulate the experience of it bringing her to her senses. This way the moment to moment stuff works its way into the reader.

>>19746350
>You've never been inside an Orthodox Church.
Think again.

>You clearly have not read the Cloud
Think again.

>haven't read Huxley
Think again.

Look at your posts and ask yourself why anyone would discuss anything with a pseudo-Christian Orthodox LARPer who doesn't see the irony-wrapped cringe he put out to the world.

My time is better spent showing you how the world experiences you. And we both know I got everything right.