/lit/ - Literature

I think I've depleted my last reserves of self respect or patience. For many years I wanted to write but recognized I had no talent for it. I dragged my feet when it was time to practice, and I rationalized it by saying it wouldn't do any good to force out bad writing if I wasn't inspired. My life went on despite the fact and my mediocrity in every other aspect of my life was made apparent. Alright, no more excuses then. I'm rubbish at everything else anyways, so if I'm to get good at anything it might as well be something I like doing. I forced it out. I've been writing every day for months. Some poetry but mostly prose. Stories I've made up, writing prompts, imitating the prose of other writers. It's all terrible I can hardly stand to read it it's so bad. I Literally no improvement since when I was 16 and thought I could write a Joseph Conrad novel on the old broken Macbook my father gave me. If you put something I wrote last week and something I wrote 8 years ago next to each other I don't think I would be able to tell them apart. The one thing I actually enjoyed doing, the one passion in my entire solitary life and I'm just incomparably terrible at it. There is no salvation. I do not even have one breath of good prose in me.

how long does it take to learn latin?

I'm too embarassed to admit I want to be a writer, basically because I'm so fucking bad. Everything I write, it just comes out awful, and it has for years without any discernible improvement. I've written and deleted around 10k words over the last few years. If I told anyone I liked writing, they would naturally asked to read some of my stuff.
I would choose great literary talent over fame, fortune or not being an incel, I've always wished I could write a novel so great it was added to the Western Canon.