/lit/ - Literature

>>19667051
vodjka
>>19667096
god do i wish i could smoke some weed right now. but we must continue. we must make it brother.
were going to make it.
cheers

30 days sober from weed.

I should feel good but I just cant. There is still a bug lurking deep within me. Its screaming. It wants to turn off. It wants to get high and it wants to know when it can get high. It needs a date but I cannot give it one. I'm still a fiend and I need to do what's right and keep going. At least that's what I think is right. I don't know. Its all so tiresome. The other night I had one of the most disturbing dreams I've ever experienced. In the dream my cousin had recently committed suicide and we were visiting my aunt to console her. While we were there she told me to go to his room and take whatever I wanted as souvenirs. There were so many cool things in his room...but all I wanted was the weed in his dresser, I was tantalized by it. Awful. Even in my subconscious I am haunted by the leaf.

Anyways. Tomorrow I have a 2nd round job interview for a company I would really like to work at. I am not religious but if there is any sort of higher power or divine entity that cares about me, I pray that it will bless me with good fortune and give me a chance at real life. I'm tired of the hellish "degenerate-simulator" that my life has become. Id like to find some solace. I'll end up at the bar regardless of what happens though. It seems like the bottle is the only thing that makes me feel happy these days. Whatever. Goodnight.

https://youtu.be/4TZhc76BOcg