/lit/ - Literature

Criticism on a single paragraph.
Preferably constructive, but this is 4chan, so you can rip it to bits if you want too.

> Post your own, so we can rate your work too.

Stella heard her husband turn on the shower as she stood in the mirror. She felt fat, old and more than a little misshapen. She pressed her hand to flatten the soft skin over her stomach and tried to stand up a little straighter. She was surprised her husband still had such a desire for her. She looked like a mother, or worse perhaps, her own mother. It was true Seveners aged well and as she neared her forty-eighth summer solstice she probably looked far better than most, but Stella was her own comparison and always had been. She looked at herself and thought of the fresh faced, smooth skinned, red haired beauty that had won the heart of a young Captain so many years ago. Dirk was always telling her that she needn’t compare herself to anything other than him, saying he was an ugly old soldier. Although he meant well, he didn’t realise quite how challenging that was. Dirk was as masculine as could be, and it made her want to be more feminine in contrast. Her mind turned to his broad shouldered, well muscled frame, his thick dark beard neatly cropped and a twinkle in his eye that still could set hearts racing in many a young maid. Their youngest daughter had said that his modesty was matched only by hers.

>>17401346
This is basically Joseph Campbell on easy mode.
It dovetails nicely with the Noah rainbow.