/lit/ - Literature

>>19262289
(2/3)

I think I came up with the idea of using one of these trash receipts for our return. We just needed to find a receipt for an item one of us already owned. After collecting dozens of them, we found someone who bought a GameCube at a Best Buy…and Crissy’s brother had a busted GameCube in the basement we could return without anyone noticing.

Of course when we went to Chrissy’s basement, we found it in awful shape. The thing was covered in peeling stickers, the controller was literally chewed on, and the d-pad was polished to a shine by a thousand hours of gamer grease. We were committed to returning this piece of junk, but it was starting to look impossible to pass it off as only 30-days of abuse.

None of us wanted to be tge one to do the deed, but through the age old process of rock-paper-scissors I was chosen. I put the old-ass gamecube back into its box and taped the 2-day old receipt to it.

We spent hours concocting explanations. “Why am I returning it? Well, it just displays a black screen when we start it.” “Oh, the stickers? As soon as he opened the box, Jimmy slapped those on.” “The controller? I didn’t notice that, maybe the dog chewed on it.” “The box it came in? We threw it out and the garbage truck picked it up yesterday.” I expected to be grilled on this, but with $199 on the line I intended to show up prepared.

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