/lit/ - Literature

>been working in job for months and other people in my team are in their 20s and I'm an early 30s ugly beta who doesn't talk to anyone
>was asked on my second day if I wanted to go drinking after work and I refused and wasn't asked since
>decide, fuck it, I'll try to be happy and social, that's what all the people in the cool stories do, even the overtly self-proclaimed introverted ones
>go to after work drinks
>walk just behind the coworkers awkwardly on the way there and wasn't talking to them so I pretended to tie my shoelaces so they went ahead and then I could walk alone to the pub
>feeling so pathetic but then that's how everyone feels, allegedly
>order most generic looking drink
>sit kind of near other people, maybe half a foot further away from everyone else than most people are
>face burning with cringe and everythingstential crisis makes me feel like I have a hollow head
>other people awkwardly seem to acknowledge me with their body language as the weird guy they have to just about acknowledge out of politeness by tilting their bodies and heads 1 degree towards me
>everyone talks about generic normie shit relating to their large friend groups, social activities, holidays, and fun nights out
>too loud to hear people easily
>at one point the two overtly-mechanically friendly people sitting nearest to me ask if I had any Christmas holiday plans and I said no, not really
>tried to half about but still felt I was speaking too quietly
>they still seemed to hear me, I think
>cringe off the charts
>they go back to talking
>look at phone repeatedly
>after 20 minutes I just put my glass back and walk out
>cringe off the charts but then the cool night air washes over me like a perfectly relaxing bath and I walk home quickly and upright, with heightened attention towards the normies passing by, as if I'm trying to focus energy towards them in a way that says "I'm just like you, I just came from regular socialising like anyone else"

>tfw I want to start a blog but I know that if I write about anything other than my own experiences I will be so painfully lower midwit it will physically hurt

I don't think I have an IQ below 100 (pretty sure it's not less than 110 if I'm being honest). I am just so literal minded and lacking in imagination and trendiness. I have such a low tolerance for bullshit. I'm too smart to over-extrapolate or draw strong conclusions from limited data. I'm not socially adept enough to read the room, irl or online, to boost my status in to a more advantageous position through words alone. I'm too non-pretentious to bullshit and too smart to parrot the narratives presented to me like an NPC.

>>18017725
>fell for the start with the sabaens meme
I DON'T WANT TO READ ANY MORE THEOLOGICAL HYDRAULIC ENGINEERING TABLETS

Any books on how to get in touch with my ex-girlfriend when she's blocked me on everything?

About to check myself into a mental hospital in about 14 hours for suicide, and have my faggot family guilt trip me for several weeks, gonna have my psych student brother try to psychologize me as well gay. Time to get some drugs niggers.

Is there any moral objectivism other than religion? I'm to autistic for relativism

>>13659077
>mfw these hos are dating and bedding different men every WEEK and i haven't had a gf in five years

>start with the greeks
>Buy illiad
>translation uses latin names for gods

Love isn't real

post literature that proves me wrong

i have an idea for a novel but cant get the start right any help?

>>12455877
>poor
We're all in the 1% here anon. Nice shelves. Where the Blake? Chaucer? Milton?

>that hardcover Landmark Caesar
i-i'm not mad. you're mad...!

>be middle schooler
>read books all the time
>not school assignments, but because you want to
>enjoy the fuck out of it
>reading is your passion
>start spending lots of time on the internet
>slowly starts to displace your hobby
>cue college
>zero time for reading for enjoyment
>studying all the time
>breaks gobbled up by mindless internet videos
>finish college
>brain irreparably morphs to seek out quick dopamine rushes
>open book
>struggle to retain attention
>at best finished one chapter
>"I'll read more later"
>cue a month later
>realize I started two books without moving beyond chapter one
Is it my fault for failing to focus long enough to read through the book entirely, or is it the book's fault for not retaining my attention?

Gone are the times I would be gripped by a book, and fanatically read through it. A month ago I started to read "Les Enfants Terribles" and "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep". Basically got through the first chapters, but frankly there's nothing exciting in either story.

What are some books that can rekindle by passion for reading?

>>12282260
>Why are there so many christcucks in /lit/? They derail every single thread and when you call them out they revert to name calling and mentioning fedoras. Why are they seething all the time?
>Why are they seething all the time?
>Why are they seething
>SEETHING

>>11119764

I had to read the article because I assumed you were baiting

>tfw missing the point of Huck Finn
>tfw Mark Twain paid for the education of black people in secret

What book will:

>Stop me wasting so much time on the internet
>Stop me feeling so guilty about everything I do, don't do, and how I do it
>Make me start working hard

>>10850254
NOOOO STOOOP

How do I stop overthinking everything and feeling cucked because of everything I do or don't do, and how I do it?

There are 20+ books I feel like I need right now to not be a pleb. And lots of intellectual topics to learn. And practical stuff to do. And food and drink to consume or not. I feel cucked for not doing everything everyday in every way.

I think this feeling causes me to procrastinate the start of real life by mindlessly browsing the internet rather than face the certain failure of an actual life.

>feel like my default state is on the internet rather than off
>spent shitloads of time on the internet in the past 6 years

I don't have ADD tendencies or anything but when I'm on the internet it's hard getting off

>one more book for the pseud cred and then I'll read for enjoyment

>be me
>be an ugly beta 27 year old
>wake up at 9 am
>read brideshead revisited for 3 hours and feel sad I didn't go to Oxford or have friends at university
>feel like a consumerwhore for reading instead of creating
>go to gym (felt weak due to coffee affecting sleep)- Staceys everywhere, awful pop music everywhere celebrating Chads and Staceys
>go to full time job
>leave work after 10 minutes because I have nothing to do- realise I am unhappy during what should be my prime
>realise that when I stayed at the office 9-5 my life was gone
>go to drink coffee in central London and browse 4chan and feel sad about my life
>will probably binge on junk food when I get home due to the demoralisation of seeing Staceys who consider me an ugly subhuman

>struggling to think of a good life philosophy- endlessly agonise over means and ends
>constantly scolding myself for not focusing on one thing, focusing on many things, waking up early, working late at night etc.
>having schedules or detailed plans or routines
>know that this is stupid but it won't stop torturing me

>will spend the Friday night either reading, or, if I can summon the willpower, learning maths / programming because I feel like I have to
>did well in education but procrastinate learning stuff or any productive hobbies because I feel like an IQ fatalist (or it's how I justify laziness to myself)

>started reading brideshead revisited
>section with his youth at Oxford university
>hated my time at university so reading this is like blissful torture

>find out today I have failed ANOTHER graduate assessment centre for a very prestigious workplace (pol would accuse it of being 99.9 % Jews, to give you an idea)
>these are interviews and group exercises that test you solely on your normieness
>aged 27 and have passed only 1 out of about 40 interview processes due to ugliness and introversion and being an ugly beta
>have had 4 in the past two months and failed 3 of them
>have one final assessment centre next week (following the one I passed)
>tfw already 21 year olds get these jobs while I am not posh enough

FFS, WHY even bother with life when being an ugly beta is career suicide? This is infuriating.

And if I don't get this I will be too old to get graduate jobs because they all start up to a year after you pass the interview. It seems like it's the career slow lane for me. I'm going to have to just invent new lies for competency interviews.

And I have to see Chads and Staceys all over central London, who have everything handed to them. My current job requires no effort, which is my only silver lining. I will always be an ugly subhuman and knowing everyone sees me as that is demoralising. How can I have any motivation when this is life?

>aged 27
>no friends since school, no female attention ever, never been to pub, club, or party
>become the ugly loser loner nobody talks to on day 1 of every job
>no passions in life
>main hobby is walking around central London, feeling sad about life

I feel so pathetic. I am so lazy and have no expertise or in depth knowledge in anything. I have a stem degree I had no interest in so I forgot everything immediately. I put no effort in to it after a while and passed with an acceptable grade which is kind of an achievement but not really.

I have a low paying but outwardly respectable job but I do brain-dead shit and I do almost no work. Whenever I've had to stay from 9-5 at any job I felt like my life was immediately over. Or even 5 hour part time job shifts were unbearable.

I just wish I had the balls and work ethic to go home and work hard on one thing but you always get insulted if you don't do loads of shit. You like books? Well read shitloads of books and only read the ones praised by the dumb masses (classics and NYT best sellers). You want to learn programming? Masturbate with functional nonsense or else you're dumb.

And not only all that, I feel guilty over process as well. I am constantly trying to analyse my psychology as if I have no willpower. "Shall I exercise first and then do my chores? If I exercise first then I won't do the chores."

And for over 600 (probably no exaggeration) times in the past 3 years I have had junk food and coffee while telling myself it's the last time and tomorrow I will stop for a long time. And when I worked in an awful part time job I would always tell myself I'd work hard when I got home on intellectual stuff. And then I'd completely waste my free time on the internet.

I feel like I have been procrastinating starting real life because I see it as a load of shit I have to do to avoid being ostracised by society, rather than the stuff I want to do.

I could go on about being an ugly autist beta loser loner etc but I can't even enjoy my free time or make it productive. I see tonnes of attractive normies getting everything handed to them and it demoralises me so much. It is like salt in the wounds.

>tfw I want to read a tonne of books and be one of those insanely well read people but reading even 60 pages a day is a big chunk of my time taken away
>want to also spend lots of time doing other stuff (learning maths, programming, exercising)