/lit/ - Literature

>>20821907
>Be UK Norf FC lad, 25yo
>2016 just after the election in the USA
>I wore a red MAGA hat for partly lulz but Trump is the only remotely based candidate in decades too
>I am in a very very liberal pro-EU and pro-Labour Party bar in Norf of England
>I had a kindle and was reading a book
>The two chicks sat next to me on the long bench thing
>One is a strawberry blonde qt and another is turbo autist librarian looking bitch
>Not the librarian you are thinking of, she was aspergery and smelt weird
>qt looked a bit like pic rel but not that perfect or air brushed
>After they were talking for a while, apropos of nothing, blonde wheels on me
>Little qt smirk
>She says "whattya reading?"
>She had an implacable Euro accent so I didn't say I was reading the Turner Diaries
>"Lord of the Rings"
>"Oh great! I like LOTR, but I think it is a bit of an undertaking so I haven't read it in ages"
>"I prefer The Hobbit actually" I say with my most charming and detached tone possible
>"Oh my god, thank you!!! I have been sayng it for years" she says with real lean-in interest
>Without a beat being missed she asked if the hat was ironic or serious
>I say both
>She gives me a shit test "it is either ironic or serious, it cannot be both?!"
>I double down and say "okay, let me rephrase, it is a jolly good time and it is deadly serious too"
>She starts the shit test conveyer belt
>We talk for maybe 15 minutes
>I make sure to include her friend and state my points with determination and didn't budge
>She leans in and nods along, she is interested, I do not compromise or agree to disagree ONCE
>After a while I tell her (tell) that I am buying us all drinks, she says ok, we continue
>I go up for more but she stops me and tells me it is her round (bitch buying ME drinks? sheeit)
>After however long the bar closes and we all step out
>I ask about her charming accent, she says German, so I am glad I wasn't honest
>I say where and she says it is in Europe (teasing me)
> I roll my eyes and say "no, are you Bavarian or...." and she acts shocked, and slaps my arm
>She was from Westphalia
>She invites me and her friend to a late bar but I hate the place and I reluctantly excuse myself
>She says "I am glad you didn't just blow off my questions and call me a snowflake"
>I said "no no never, I hate that nasty term, it is rude.... I much prefer Libtards"
>She is in stitches, rosy cheeks, sparkly eyes, and sweetly tells me goodnight
>I was about a month or two out of the worst relationship of my life, so I wasn't invested
>Glad it ended politely, and gave me a much needed confidence boost, I was in much pain
Fin