/lit/ - Literature

>Attention young students! I have recently been made aware that a certain mass murderer has escaped from the Azakaban magical prison/perpetual torture facility. This may come as a shock since no one has ever been known to escape from Azakaban before and because, by all reports, he is specifically targeting a student of this very school. Nevertheless I assure you we have taken all the necessary precautions. Among these precautions are the Dementors. The demonic jailers of the very same magical prison which this murderer has already just escaped. I would like to inform you that those horrible specters floating above every entrance and patrolling the school grounds do indeed harbor no regard for human life. That said, with all likelihood they will most likely not try to suck out and consume your living soul so long as you stay out of their way and have not had a particularly hard lot in life. In light of this information, I still elect not to include the effective Patronus Charm spell into your yearly curricula. If you do, for whatever reason, still desire to further protect your young soul from these ghastly wraiths you will be able to stay after hours with the known werewolf I have employed this year.
>Good luck.

.......However

>>14723050
"To all Gryffindors... Cheers. Cheers, my friends. It has been an honour. Cheers!"

>Dumbledore fixes his eyes on the Slytherin table, completely ignoring Ravenclaw and the other one

"Now Slytherin... I know we have had our differences, but your ambition and hard work is truly something to behold. Admirable!"

>the Slytherins are cautious. Dumbledore usually follows up a praise with some humiliation and injustice

"Indeed, I have a special treat for you all because of these traits. It's so good, that you'll love it despite its Muggle origin. It is a large apparatus which all of you can fit in which will confer all of you a deeply unique experience that shall benefit us all. A chamber of sorts. I have had that room over there fitted with the apparatus. Move along, children, shuffle into it now. You too, Snape*

>the Slytherins flood into the room, some cautious and some excited

>Dumbledore slams the door shut and enchants it to be locked and airtight. He turns to the other houses

"And that special treat? That "unique experience" the Slytherins shall all experience and you all won't?

"..."
"...Why, it's... DEATH! FUCK SLYTHERIN! THE FINAL SOLUTION TO THE SLYTHERIN MENACE BEGINS NOW! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL, TURN ON THE GAS! YES, YES, WELL DONE, SLYTHERIN! WELL DONE SLYTHERIN FOR DYING SO WELL! SIX MILLION POINTS TO A HOUSE THAT SHALL CEASE TO EXIST IN 6 MINUTES!"

>He said calmly. Dumbledore's mouth foams during his blood-crazed tirade, the hall erupts into applause and a massive, inter-house orgy ensues. The Slytherins begin dying in the gas chamber. As Malfoy chokes on his own blood, Harry proves himself to be a sexual dominant member of the orgy

>Dumbledore looks on with pride

>Years later Harry Potter tells recounts these events to his son, Albus, at bedtime, with Ginny smiling warmly at the memory.

"And that's how Dumbledore exterminated the Slytherin scum. HEIL GODRIC! Dumbledore truly was the greatest headmaster of them all, and a good friend"

>Work on a novel every day
>Urge to consume any other media fades away and quickly becomes unsatisfying outside of very small bursts

First step of enlightenment taken

What the fuck was his problem? If he didn't want Slytherin winning so badly then he could've just told Snape to tone it the fuck down.

>>11335505
>>11335839
Honestly from the revision of the first chapter that Im now working on the only paragraph that I found 1000 words in that doesnt involve terminology only seen in this particular novel is just going to sound like something straight out of one of lovecrafts works ( on top of it being shoddy if Im now just going to quickly translate something on the spot)

actually I just checked and even that includes a "made up" word, admittedly which Ive posted on this board before but the closer I inch to this thing actually being finished the more I want to keep it fresh and interesting for the people who might be interested in actually reading the full book

>>10739776
I have it on good authority that it's absolutely terrible and no desire to read it. So well done, OP, yes well done, well done....

HOWEVER

If my gf bought it for me and it was her favourite book too, I would at least try to read it through. You're doing the wrong thing, love is about compromise, 10000 points to Gryffindor.