/lit/ - Literature

>spent most of my adolescence and my entire adult life learning French, Spanish, Portuguese Latin, Ancient Greek, Icelandic, and Dutch
>friends and family would always ask me why I'd choose to waste so much time and energy learning obscure languages, tell them they're what interest me
>did nothing but peruse my interest in languages and linguistics for 10+ years
>now I'm 28, have no friends, no girlfriend, really no career, all because I decided to bend my energy on accumulating functionally useless information
>the only work I could get was teaching HS English
Don't be like me /int/. This field has no serious fulfillment to offer whatsoever, leave NOW while you still can.

what do I do if my health is completely failing and im poor and my house is killing me (poor shit parents trapped here against will) and im American (no health insurance)

>eyes are always black
>literally cant evne take a picture
>body is pale as fuck pale as can be
>people call me albino
>my eyes are totally black
>i mean like not even black bags
>like shit you can see a mile away
>my entire bottom eye lid is black brown purple blue and red
>literally the biggest black bags i have ever seen
>people tell me i look tired as fuck, i look high, i look like i havent slept in weeks
>people look at me weird
>always have to worry about it
>constantly afraid of being in pictures
>gaining weight from fatigue
>always too tired to do anything
>i can just sleep and sleep and sleep and sleep and sleep all day
>still tired after sleeping
>take monsters, caffeine pills, and all this shit
>still feel tired but its the best i get
>cant eat healthy because it makes me feel like shit
>i have to eat junk shit like pizza and little debbie snacks because it gives me more energy than salads and shit

idk wtf to do. i go for 1-2 mile walks, nature walks, bike rides, get sun, get fresh air, drink water all day starting as soon as i get out of bed. at least eat half way healthy with salad, fruit, vegetables, sauces, chicken and shit like that. i take a multi vitamin every day now, i take iron pills here and there, i take herbal pills.

its not the caffeine either i tried totally abstaining from caffeine and it did nothing and plus THIS level of tired doesnt simply come from caffeine use this is some shit.

i have to sleep 12 hours a day, take a nap, lay around half the day, and then i get like 2-4 hours if im lucky of having energy

I think my house might be killing me like mold, lead, etc or thyroid problem + depression

I feel this massive existential dread creeping over me whenever I think about the fact that I don't have kids. It's like a faint horror in the back of my mind that follows me whenever I see a thick fertile female or my gf.

Are there any books with this theme?

>>12534803
>This book is dedicated to Annie. Please come back Im sorry for everything oh my god please I cant live without you everything I do is for you I wrote this for you please Ill do anything just talk to me again